ADHD & Emotions : do you struggle with Emotional Dysregulation 😣?
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 17 май 2022
- ✨📓 Assess Yourself With Your Pre-Diagnosis Workbook👇workbook.theminiadhdcoach.com...
✨ Chapters:
0:17 Introduction
1:36 Why emotional dysregulation happen in many people with ADHD?
3:17 What can you do about it?
Hi 👋 ! My Name is Alice, I created The Mini ADHD Coach in august 2020 when I was just diagnosed with ADHD at 29.
After years of questioning, therapy, burnout, and chaotic career path changes, I finally understood why I struggled with so many things.
So I decided to share what I learned to raise awareness around ADHD and help the ADHD community thrive.
💕 To learn more about ADHD visit www.theminiadhdcoach.com
⭐️Join me on Instagram @the_mini_adhd_coach
🔗 Interesting articles
ADHD & Feeling always tired: www.theminiadhdcoach.com/blog...
ADHD & Impulsivity: www.theminiadhdcoach.com/blog...
ADHD & Lying: www.theminiadhdcoach.com/blog...
Have you ever found yourself getting angry at a teeny tiny problem? You know it doesn’t exactly make sense to be so angry about it, but you can’t help how you feel. Or do you feel extreme anxiety over something as small as a late bus?
Perhaps you regularly feel like your emotions are just too much to handle?
Well, if you have ADHD, these are entirely normal symptoms. In fact, these occurrences are perfect examples of what we call emotional dysregulation. This term refers to the inability to properly regulate your emotions and emotional responses, and it’s very common. One study showed that 73% of adults with ADHD experience emotional dysregulation. This number is slightly lower in children; around 24-50%.
Unfortunately, emotional dysregulation can have a really big impact on daily life, your relationships, and your self-esteem. You may feel very self-conscious about your reactions to certain situations and worry about what your loved ones and friends think. In turn, that can lead to a spike in associated symptoms like anxiety and depression.
So, why exactly does emotional dysregulation happen in many people with ADHD?
There are physical reasons for emotional dysregulation occurring. Bear with us while we get a little technical.
The amygdala is the part of our brain that looks after our emotions and triggers the decisions that we make each and every day. When emotions like anger or worry flow through the amygdala, it sends an overwhelming response to the cerebral cortex. Usually, the cerebral cortex would temper this response and act as a halfway point, allowing you time to think through for a moment before outwardly displaying your emotions.
However, some scientists believe that this connection between the cerebral cortex and the amygdala is not as powerful in people with ADHD, so the emotional response doesn’t exactly ‘slow down’ as it arrives at the cerebral cortex. And from there, well… your reactions might be more intense than you’d like! This means it can also take longer for the feelings to subside and for you to calm down.
🎬 Credits
Animation: Dan Carlo Ramirez
📚 Sources
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/arti...
www.additudemag.com/emotional...
What’s your dominant emotion 😠😂😭🤩😔🤪 ?
im beetween angry and laughing
i was diagnosed at age 6
Anger and my reaction too funny things
Worry, unfortunately. Anxiety is very strong with me. I also have issues with excitement, which sucks when I'm watching a movie or a show and I have to leave the room because I'm overwhelmed by my emotions. Thriller and horror movies are no go's for this reason.
anger
Sadness and struggling not to cry 😅
its incredible how adhd is way more than just hard time focusing and getting things done
I wish i didnt burst into tears over the slightest things that, even as the tears are filling my eyes, i am aware of how stupidly inconsequential the issue im crying over is. Like my brain knows it's not that deep, but my throat starts hurting and my eyes get damp and all hell breaks loose when i try to stop it. Its so annoying and frustrating.
I'm 100% a cryer too. It's not hard to get triggered by something and then my mind goes on a self-deprecating tangent that makes me so upset I lose track of what I'm doing and I have to curl up for a while and cry. And that can happen anywhere, out in public, with friends, at work or school. It sucks.
I cry so often too, I cried so many times at work, every time, I feel upset, you can be sure, tears are coming. People say I am overly sensitive, I feel everything so intensively. I can cry seeing something upsetting online or tv, but when I am happy, I am also super energetic, jumpy, overly enthusiastic, etc...I only realise that many symptoms I have been experiencing all my life could be actually ADHD but at the same time, I have always good at school, uni and work, I struggle more with my personal life and staying on top of tasks, especially admin related tasks, I am also very fussy and tidy (I heard it is more the opposite in a lot of adhders?), extremely perfectionistic, not sure really if these symptoms could mean I have ADHD...Feeling quite lost!
@@annemarliac4947I relate to this a lot.
@@annemarliac4947I am also a perfectionist and love being tidy and organized so yes it's easy to think we can't have ADHD if our personality is like that. But here's the thing - is it easy for you to always remain tidy/organized or remember to do tasks that you are supposed to do a certain day? Or do you often have to make extra efforts to accomplish them? Are there still days where you haven't tidied up your place and you're feeling guilty about it but also just really don't feel like doing it? You said you struggle with staying on top of tasks, that's a very ADHD-like struggle.
Also, a very common symptom - especially found on every one of those online ADHD tests - is how frequently you lose things. Now I'm someone who rarely loses things because of my tendency to keep everything organized at all times which means I know exactly where something is supposed to be and I usually keep everything back at the same spot (if not immediately because of procrastination, then as soon as I feel like it). So yeah, I don't lose things a lot. *But* I do forget things very very often and that's something not found on these questionnaires a lot. I often step out in my slippers and then come back remembering I forgot to change into my shoes. I forget to take my keys all the time, sometimes even my phone.
So, if you maybe think a bit more, maybe there's something you're missing or not paying close attention to? Not everyone's ADHD signs are the exact same
@@annemarliac4947 I have almost the EXACT same symptoms as you do and I've had them my whole life. I was diagnosed with ADHD at 6 years old, frequently saw a neurologist as a child, as well as took a variety of different medications but ritalin worked better for me when I was young. My diagnosis never came close to explaining my hyper-emotional behavior and my fixation on ritual, routine, and order. I was recently diagnosed with autism as well, so I have a dual ADHD and autism diagnosis...and I feel like it truly does explain the dichotomy of my symptoms. It's like I have 2 people inside of me, I never truly felt like a had a true sense of self, and it's so incredibly NICE to have an answer as to why I'm so incredibly different from everyone around me and why I don't fit in with anyone. Knowing isn't going to "fix" me, but it's amazing knowing that I'm not alone! And it's a proper first step to receiving the treatments and medications that are right for me. When I was in school, there was no such thing as an adhd/autism dual diagnosis, they were thought to be mutually exclusive. But ADHD is now understood to be much more closely related to autism, but they aren't the same condition.
At this friend once back in high school and she had told me something that was really detrimental to her and I I remember maybe overreacting a little and then I remember her telling me this is why I don't tell you things because of the way you react and that hurts a lot.
Man, that sucks dude. I'm sorry that happened.
You gotta pratice regulation my dude
I remember hearing that
Sorry if it’s rude to say “Same” and stuff to things like this, but I relate to this a lot.
When me (a person speculating ADHD) has a friend crying or feeling really happy, I tend to be kinda numb, bored, or awkward, and don’t know how to react. This also happens with less noticeable (for me atleast) social cues.
I think I heard similar response.. not at that moment but it was after I got to know her in person then I left the office. She thought i was overreacting, even it was said later, i was hurt.
Sometimes, when someone says something a little hurtful or thoughtless, I get this rush of adrenalin that is way over the top despite what my mind is telling me. It is so embarrassing to burst into tears when I'm not even that upset, because because I cannot control my body, in a situation where doing something physical to burn it out first is not an option.
I rarely relate to something more!! When I cry I often tell the other that I don't care that much and my tears just come out! I also hate being comforted when I'm like this
That is so painfully relatable omg. My boss told me to stop putting so much paper in the printer because it jammed on her (A perfectly reasonable request, she wasn't even mean about it or anything) and the adrenaline rush made my arms tingle like I was being spun around forcing the blood into my outstretched arms. I started shaking and had to choke down tears. I felt so god damn pathetic but I just can't control my bodies response and it is FRUSTRATING 😢 The worst part is, that my constant panicking makes me way more prone to making mistakes than are actually going to get people mad at me and it's all just some kind of stupid cycle of overreacting and causing more PROBLEMS BY OVERREACTING AAAH
I have a 3 step process for when I catch myself getting worked up or dwelling too much on past mistakes. I go through the steps as needed:
-Deep breath
-Grounding (where am I, what time is it, smells and sounds, etc.)
-Perspective (why, where, just how big of a deal is it?, how did it happen, how can I improve instead of sitting in shame/anger/sadness?)
I'll try this. Thank you!
None of those things work for me
Funny, I was told to ground myself ALOT through my teens but... I feel that thinking logically about it helps me a lot more (the Perspective part of what your wrote) whereas grounding does nothing for me.
@@MorgansMemez the first steps just help me pull out of the flashback or whatever my mind is going to. If I’m reliving a moment I regret or smth, grounding reminds me of what is ACTUALLY going on, and furthers the final step’s effectiveness
I love when people tell me it "isn't that deep" I know it's not tell my brain that
When I was a kid, there was way too much focus on the emotional dysregulation, the school (ab)used it massively. I was bullied every day throughout elementary school AND our version of college. I was always, ALWAYS told "Just ignore them, you are making it fun for them by being so angry". To this day I wonder if a teacher would just ignore it if they came to work and was greeted daily by "Hi ugly", people trying to trip them up on the stairs, people intentionally bumping into them etc.
When I get comfortable with people that's when my mask comes off. I overreact, I can't control it because it happens in a split second. I apologise but I'm already at 100. Small things trigger it, an unwanted touch, farting or burping (smell triggers me), the phone ringing, dirt, the list goes on. Luckily I have a partner who understands 😂
Exactly me.
This literally made me cry. I was diagnosed last year and so much of my life makes sense now.
are you now capabale of controlling your emotions like normal people.
This literally hits me in the feels because I struggle with emotional dysregulation and it’s not just because of having ADHD. I have this issue because of the fact that I had a right frontal lobe brain injury that occurred before I was born. It sucks because sometimes I just wish that I could just react and express my emotions the same way everyone else does without having my form of ADHD, my brain injury, my autism (I was diagnosed with autism this year on my birthday) impact how I express my emotions and cause me so much reactivity with some of my emotions.
Feeling emotions deeply can sometimes be the very bane of my own existence.
Thank you so much for sharing this. I have ADHD and I don’t really struggle with attention as being a college student helped me to organize and manage my time with practices to combat those issues non-pharmacologically. I so glad to see this part of ADHD which was ruled out originally many years ago. I am so happy to see it coming back into mental health science as a true problem with people with ADHD. I know many people with ADHD and most of us have the intrusive thinking. Once we are in that thought, it spirals and controls our emotions for the entire day and is near impossible to climb out. At the same time, I turn minor things in my head into utmost tragedies when really it is nothing. Or I will turn a minor detail in my previous relationship into a monologue or story that will cause me to dwell, be angry, anxious and it affect my past relationship. I don’t feel normal sometimes because of this. I meditate, exercise and am on stimulate meditation which all help. I am so thankful and blessed to see this coming back into the science and light as a forefront topic in the ADHD world. To all my fellow ADHD’ers especially those of us who have truly been heart broken over a break up because our emotions lead to that break up and partners couldn’t handle us anymore, you are not alone. You are not alone with this problem and just realize IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. ❤️
Its not always the same but i have quite a lot of symptoms and one is getting bored easily so how on earth did you type this its like an entire book?!?
@@moonlight_day8282 well, everyone have different interests
The intrusive thoughts and the inner monologues, 😮😮😮I do that a loooot, like my brain doesn't stop it, especially when I'm washing the dishes! It starts of small word or thought and it develops to sometito me getting angry at nothing and when I get back to my reality I find myself just over reacting over an internal monologue 😅
i never knew until now why it took me so long to.calm down whenever I cried or feel sad or angry. It's funny that unpleasant emotions taked longer to calm down than positive emotions.
I havent been diagnosed for adhd but i really feel something's wrong with me. I remember when i was 9 and got really upset, angry that my friend was wearing the same shirt as me despite loving the idea of it a few days prior. Then there was another incident when i was 5-6 and I wanted to bring some cookies to the fridge. I started crying when my cousins took the cookies and put them in the fridge after i said i was going to do it- i felt a surge of embarrassment from both situations-
I absolutely understand. I’ll get angry, or maybe frustrated is a better word, and react in an angry or frustrated way… but I almost immediately realize that what I did was not the right way to react. Then I feel embarrassed. Sometimes I will apologize, but an apology can only take you so far.
Those are just two examples from when you were a kid, im not trying to bring you down but if you had emotional dysregulation it would happen more often and not things that happened years ago. Honestly the 5 year old reaction is so normal, most kids would be rlly upset by that.
For me I’m the opposite (don’t have it/speculating adhd) I am not good at regulating things in the little area. Such as, not knowing how to respond when people cry around me, staring blank at someone when they are explaining a traumatic experience, and then breaking down when my parents make a little joke.
I've lost friends and lovers - i also grew with ptsdc. I'm thankful to your video. Now I do not feel like I', alone.
Long-distance-hugs
ADHD overthinking is bad enough, I cannot imagine ptsd on top of it :(
I was diagnosed when I was 40 it felt like a relief cause I always knew, plus my sister died of cancer that year if I had not been diagnosed when I was I probably would not be here today
Omg thank you! I have been called hot headed and an over thinker/ over reactor. I was diagnosed in February. I want to so better, my relationships, job, and social life is falling apart.
I'm just starting my ADHD journey... much, MUCH later in life than might have been optimal. I've done some online tests and scored almost 100% in all of them, and I've watched videos about symptoms that I've slowly been ticking off. I'm now at the point where I'm so convinced that this is what I'm dealing with, that I'm actually going to seek a diagnosis. And then I discovered this channel, which has quickly and quietly walked me through all my symptoms, even the ones that aren't "official" ADHD symptoms yet...
But THIS video has really grabbed my attention (pun intended). This describes perfectly a part of my personality that I'd never even considered might be connected with ADHD. The experience I've had watching this video has been nothing short of life-changing, and I thank you most sincerely for it.
Wonderful content!!
I don't have ADHD but someone very important to me does. And I'm trying to learn further about ways to be of good support and help if needed
❤
ur so sweet
i have adhd......i'm in a horrible phase due to it....and my mom won't take me for treatment because it's "in my head" so i should be able to "solve it on my own" and not make such a big deal about something minor........i'm so horrible heartbroken over that statement
How old are you? Could you get professional help on your own?
Another idea could be to show her these videos and let her know that you would really like help. Good luck 🧡
Same with me. I am quite sure I have either adhd or generalized anxiety disorder. I’m told its all in my head, go to sleep earlier, get off the phone, go outside, get over it, etc.. Wish I could get diagnosed and treated.
@@katypopaty2287 i'm 18.....but indian....here i can be over 40 but my mom still looks over my medical needs😕
I’ve known I’ve had ADHD since I was 6years old but after watching your videos I now know why I get mad at little things and why I’m not emotionally stable and how I relate so much to basically all your videos. Also your vids make me realise how much of a barrier or mask I have created for myself and have that ‘mask’ on almost 24/7 when either with people or on my own
It's so refreshing to see a video tackling this common ADHD symptom. Ive known Ive had ADHD since I was about 3, yet I still felt different when comparing myself to portrayals of it in media. For a while, Ive kinda just assumed there was some underlying problem other than my ADHD that was causing the difficulties with emotional control. Though its nice to see that symptom get some needed attention.
And here I was trying to be faithful to someone that didn't even exist that actually wasn't going to be with me. That's the emotional part I have a hard time to believe to ever get attached.
these short videos on different topics are very helpful! and that artstyle is darn cute
I can 💯relate to this. I’m either bursting into tears or tearing into someone & sometimes both. So embarrassing‼️ And then having to apologize but not being able to explain why. Ugh! Just the worst 😱
I am soooo delighted to know why my emotions are so strong and it’s so hard to come sown from my emotions! This is amazing!
I’m 30 years old and I’ve always felt like my emotions were always hypersensitive and that there was something wrong with me, the first few minutes of this video has made me realise that I for sure have ADHD to an extent and will be seeing my GP this week, I’ve spent most of my life that I can remember just accepting it. As a child you just think you’re angry or you parents just think kids are kids, I was intelligent never got in trouble and was outgoing so it makes sense why my parents never looked down that route, most of us assumed ADHD was for “naughty kids” at school back then. As an adult them first few minutes of the vid sum up my emotional dysregulation to a tee and I’m just in shock, I feel like crying because I never knew any better after all this time. Why such small things can ruin my whole day, why it takes me so long to come back down, why I feel like I can feel it in my brain when I feel depressed. I have so much stuff going through my head I’m honestly lost for words, I can’t believe it.
When I was a child and I got angry or frustrated, I would cry. Not sobbing, but a very angry face and lots of hot tears. I used to absolutely hate that I cried so easily. Now that I'm older, I just shout which is 100000× worse 🙈😩
Thank you so much for this video with people who has ADHD and austmic like me because it's helpful and I can relate to this so much 🤗🤗🤗😢😢😢❤️❤️❤️
Just found you channel and I find your content amazing!!! Thank you!!
I think I have ADHD but instead of hoping I don't have it I hope I do, I think the reason is bc I think it's the only way for my feeling to matter
THANK FOR THE CLARITY OF EXPLANATION.
Your videos really sooth me, thank you
I grew up diagnosed at a very early age with "just the inattentive type" of ADHD but as I've gotten older I've started to notice more of the other parts of it as well and am wanting to understand myself more
Video styling is adorable btw
Though this wasn't groundbreaking for me , I did appreciate the reminders.
Is dysphonia more common in people with ADHD than others? I only just learned about it a couple of years ago. Don't have an official diagnosis (don't know how well known it is yet and if one can get one), but it just makes soooo much sense.
Thank you now i know why i struggle through this😢
(Also i have Innatentive adhd)
Sums it all.
I know this video was posted a while ago, but I'm curious as to why you recommend cutting out alcohol & drugs as part of improving emotional regulation. Is there a specific reason behind that recommendation, or is it just a generic healthy lifestyle tip?
When im trying to work on something and get into a manic cleaning or working mood, nothing can disrupt my methods. Given i have no distractions, ill get all my tasks done. But so much as moving oen thing into a space i just cleaned or into a space im currently cleaning throws me off. It gets me so mad that i literally just got peeved with my fam for cleaning, folding, and placing my fresh laundry on my bed for me to put away. I had just made it and put all of the built up laundry away from the past month. Now, im just angrya and my whole routine is ruined. Im so grateful my mom folds it and distributes it accurately, but i cant help the anger. Not sure if its my adhd talking or not, but im peeved. 😔
I lost almost all of my friends cause used to get angry easily, now that I started taking medication I feel that I started developing thicker skin 😂😂😂😂😂
What medication may I ask?
Блин, я засмотрелась ваших видео про сдвг, так что забыла сделать уроки и вообще забыла что мне надо ложиться спать и что мне завтра в школу, и сейчас час ночи и мне осталось спать четыре часа
😪
Зато видео интересные и полезные, спасибо вам за то что вы делаете, рань я думала что моя экстремальная эмоциональность, которая реально иногда мешает мне жить, это просто моя "особенность", вообще я раньше считала все симптомы сдвг за "особенности "
Всё таки приятно знать что у моего состояния есть научное подтверждение 😊
(Извините кстати что комментарии на русском, я бы не смогла выразить свои эмоции правильно на английском)
Yes very helpful
Awesome vlog‼️
Thank u I've had anger issuse😊
Does this include ovely dulled emotional reactions?
Oh oh oh... new day new info....
So what i felt before i taken SSRI for PDD it is emotional dysregulation... i thoguht that only lashed out emotions are counting...
Some only must clear me what is the difference between anexiety and emotional dysregulation...
Part of it i broken or cured with one try of recreational illegal stimulant use... part of mine dysregulation or anexiety litteraly "died" and never returned
After 3 months of ssri i got Just 0 sex drive, and anedhonia, also called PSSD. It took me more than 3 years to get better
Oh damn. Glad there’s a happy ending though.
I have been SSRIs for about 4 years now, emotions still all over place
Is it only anger or any other emotion?
The medication doesn’t work with me….I’m lost
nice video
1/3 is now “slightly”.
It's kinda opposite for me. I'm oblivious of my own emotions most of the time.
Healthy life style, diet, reagular excerise... with ADHD ? Pics or did not happen ;)
My ADHD is main direct on indirect reason why i don't do this things...
Am I outsider in this regard ?
Hehe. My diet is fine (but probably more because I enjoy making food, and don't like most junk foods)
Exercise? Hah! Not happening. Well, maybe going for walks when I get restless counts?
How about happiness
Interesting how none of the solutions proposed here involve having a sense of humour about it. Take a moment to realise how absurd your reaction to whatever mild inconvenience you’re dealing with is, and laugh.
Avoid alcohol and meditate… really haha
Have you met ppl with adhd 😅
I was also annoyed by “add into your routine” lol. What routine?!
started crying not even 2 minutes into the video, so yeah I might have this.
I think maybe a middle-high school disclaimer
I feel that your initial definition of the term "emotional disregulation" is incorrect. It does not mean that we are unable to regulate our emotions as well as other people, it means our emotions "are disregulated" and are out of sync and proportion, i.e. they are more intense and often appear out of the blue - to start with. Any person would have trouble regulating this level of emotional volatility and unpredictability... 😢
i didnt knwo therapists would perform cbt
CBT is literally what most therapists do.
Once I learned to stop giving a crap about what people think of me my life's journey has become better but I still have issues processing emotions on the fly. So I still have anger issues and sadness and sorrow issues but it has nothing to do with what people think or say about me. Look what's going on around us here in the United States of America. This is the anchor of emotions at this time.
I think i have ADHD but my parents dont pay attention
Same 😢
Hmmmm.....
i like alcohol and drugs tho helps me sleep
Drugs are the only that helped. Weed to be exact sooo
How it helped you?
@@Octavio12341000 for marijuana, it helped me to calm my nerves after a hard day of work. If it becomes overwhelming for me or if i had an argument with someone, my "high" self would tell me to relax, let go of the bad feeling and sometimes my brain would tell me that "it is what it is"
so true
Just don’t take your anger out me . I am not a punching bag. No disrespect but be aware.
I think you might want to say entertainment purposes only.
I don't support medication. It's so unnatural. But everything else was good.
So if someone has diabetes, you don't support insulin for them?
Or if someone is extremely iron-deficient/anemic, you don't support iron supplements or iron infusions?
🤔
Thats stupid you need medication to heal
sssi make your adhd worse