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Opening up about what's been going on | Infertility & MS
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- Опубликовано: 1 авг 2023
- MY INSTAGRAM: / elinlesser
MY PATREON COMMUNITY (find out more info here): / elinlesser
Today I'm opening up and sharing more about my experience with infertility and IVF, as well as my experience with multiple sclerosis (MS) diagnosis. I'm doing this for the sake of visibility for this as an issue and hopefully to help others going through something similar feel less alone.
I think when you say people get uncomfortable hearing about certain things it's because our society is generally quite surface oriented. How things look is exalted, youth is exalted because of physical beauty. But none of us last. I find I drift away from people, situations, conversations that are superficial. Honesty and realness provide true and lasting beauty, and I thank you for putting that out into the universe.
That's a really good point. And thank you ❤
I do understand. Fertility issues eight years…adopted 2 little girls all grown up! It was so traumatic …and not much support from the family. Had wished I had someone to understand, brave girl❤
As someone who was adopted and has adopted 3 children because I couldn't get pregnant.... and then miraculously ended up having 4 biological children, I have run the gamut of emotions. I understand!! I will encourage you to consider adoption. This is so near to my heart and there are so many children waiting for forever families. With your husband's medical background and your psychological background, you have so much to offer these children, more than most. I know the longing to give birth, and I hope you have that experience too, but please also consider adoption.
I went through infertility- I can relate to a lot of what you’re feeling. I was very closed about it except to those people in my life I trusted with my pain. It ran deep and was incredibly difficult. A lot of people make uninformed comments that mean we’ll but cut deep. It is a lonely experience. I hope that there is more information shared - specifically about the pain. Very much like a miscarriage - to many it isn’t a baby or a life yet, but to the mother - it is. How can we support women better in these circumstances - good conversation here
Thanks for sharing this tough journey Elin. You truly are a
“Slice of Light” to your viewers.
I’m sorry you’ve had so much all at once to deal with Elin. And I applaud your courage to speak up with such intelligence and heart. None of it is your fault. I’m glad for any bit of relief or clarity you might feel following this video and wish you well in days ahead. Sending big love xo
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I'm also struggling with infertility, and I'm so tired of all the unhelpful comments from those around me to "relax and don't worry about it - that's when you'll get pregnant", and the "my friend tried this (unscientific) method and it worked, you need to try it!". It all comes with good intentions, but for people who do not have infertility they do not understand how difficult these words hit us.
So true!!! That happens a lot. Thanks for sharing
Lol if only “just relax”ing cured actual medical conditions.. like PCOS and endometriosis, and low ovarian reserve, and blocked tubes.
I think you put this out so eloquently with transparency and grace. I’m sure there are many people who need to hear this. Thank you for taking the leap and talking about something so personal. 💜
I take issue with the sexism in the medical community too, in terms of the lack of research into how autoimmune disorders in general affect women differently. I have two autoimmune disorders that have, without a doubt affected my menstrual cycle and fertility, yet my specialists don't acknowledge it because what little research that's out there, is new (despite this being a problem for women for decades according to the research itself) and they are unaware and reluctant to look into it.
My thoughts are with you, especially as I'm in the same boat; in my 30's and wanting a child. Hugs from Ireland x
I am 45 and became infertile due to cancer treatments (leukemia) when I was I my early thirties. This was accompanied by extreme fatigue and other health issues during the cancer recovery. So I can relate a little bit and how insecure and painful your situation is. And how utterly lonely you can feel amongst friends who are young mothers and don't suffer from a medical situation. My husband and I divorced (he left me for a woman with whom he has a family now) and I met another man several years later. Long story short I am almost ten years happily together with this new man who has two lovely sons. I am not at all saying this is your path but just pointing out that life can be very unexpected and difficult. But I am sure better times will come eventually. You are not broken, you are not 'damaged goods' and it's not your fault that your body has problems. Please take good care of yourself and stay hopeful about your life. And be open about it to your friends. True friends might not relate but will be supportive. And if not you will find other friends. I wish Andy and you all the best!!!
I don't have the added layer of complexity that comes with having an illness like you do, but I did go through years of IVF. And contrary to the anecdotal narrative around IVF, I never did get pregnant. I talked about it while going through it, and was shocked to find out how many people I knew that had also gone through infertility, or who had multiple miscarriages for sometimes upwards of 8 years before having a successful pregnancy. It's all around us, but we don't often talk about it. It's HARD to talk about. It's hard not to feel like you, personally, failed as a woman. It's sometimes even harder when people say things like, "oh, I'm sure God's plan has something else in store for you!" or "have you considered adoption?" The first is borderline insulting, and the latter really glosses over just how difficult and traumatic adoption can be, especially after years of unsuccessful IVF.
But I do find that each time I share my story, the portion of the burden that I carry is a little less, because the burden of that story is being shared by others. It gets a little easier over time.
You have my heart.
On a different level of difficulty I understand the aloneness you are feeling. I pray for comfort with joy.
Thank you for sharing your story. My mother is a nurse and has worked with MS patients for many years. I personally have walked through the IVF and ended up becoming a mom through adoption at age 40! Hang in there and know that adversity will make you and your husband stronger as a couple. ❤
This is your story and it deserves space to be shared. We can hold that space for you here on your channel, and hopefully you can feel confident to share more with friends and family. Your infertility and MS dx aren’t because of anything you did - you’re right, bad things just happen sometimes to great people. Sending you love and light 🤍✨ thank you for sharing!
Dear Friend any feelings of grief are legitimate. 😢 Infertility. Miscarriages. I lost my little boy at 8 months and 3 days. The Uncertainties in Life. You are a Wonderful Person and a Wonderful Professional. What I have learned about You is How Hard You Work to Make a Better Path no matter what You are navigating. It doesnt make it hurt any less does it? With All the Love You and Your Husband Share and remember You Both through You Work Reach Countless others Daily. What a Joy you really are to many Children out here of All Ages. Bless You and THANKYOU. PS You talk about anything You Choose !❤❤❤❤
👏 yes, for visibility 👏 yes, for others struggling with the same things 👏 Well done ❤
Your story was raw, real, and honest and really resonated with me, Elin. Thanks so much for having the courage to share it. While I thankfully don’t have MS (and can’t imagine what that would be like to live with), I struggled with infertility for about 10 years (and, everything that went along with it - the Fertility Drugs; IUI; IVF; watching friends have babies and then a second, third; feeling different from my peers because I wasn’t able to connect/relate to the shared experience of pregnancy/parenthood that they were all living together; wondering what was “wrong with me” and if I had done something wrong to not be “blessed” in this same way that my friends were and openly talked about, etc.). Unfortunately, our story did not end with a pregnancy and we, personally, didn’t feel comfortable moving forward with the next suggested step of a donor egg/embryo. We explored the possibility of adoption and foster care, but didn’t feel the peace we needed to continue down either of those paths. Ultimately, we decided to remain as we are and as “pet parents” lol unless we ever learn that someone we know is personally connected to a child in need of a loving home. The truth is that several of my friendships drifted and some didn’t make it because we sadly couldn’t understand each other anymore, but my husband and I’s relationship that was tested by fire during this decade of our life (and beyond) just continued to strengthen and deepen - even to this very day. I will say the same thing to you that an understanding soul said to me once “If it is for you, it will be.” Take good care.
Wow, thank you so much for sharing your story. I so appreciate your honesty and openness, because I feel like I’ve learned something from you just from this post. It just really touched me. I really respect your choices and I can’t imagine what you’ve been through. Seriously, thank you so much for sharing. Your story is important.
❤️🙏🏻Wow, your comment brought tears to my eyes, you recounted so much of what my husband & myself have been through, in fact it could have been my story. Seventeen years on through multiple pregnancy loses & losing both my parents, we have as a couple, gone through the fire & come out a lot stronger & realise we are far more grateful & happy with our life’s than most people & that includes the ones that have kids but are always negative & unhappy. Of course being a pet parent helps 🐶🐶
Of course! Thank you for your kind words, Elin. So many women/couples struggle with infertility, but so few talk about it like you said. I was one of those ultra private people about my story for so long and touched by a sense of shame about it, but just recently (and thanks to your sharing) am choosing to be more open about it to hopefully normalize the topic/struggle a bit and help remove the stigma of shame surrounding it.❤️
@wendycaran8267 - It sounds like we have walked the same path. I’m deeply sorry for your numerous losses. I’m glad to hear that you and your husband are stronger than ever and thriving in your life now! I share the sentiment. I love this quote by Joseph Campbell which has been really helpful to me: “We must be willing to let go of the life we planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” Happy full living and pet parenting!
@@HolisticHomebody I was also a very ultra private person, but I realise like yourself, I had to let others know there is a great life to be had afterwards, It gives a lot of women courage & strength to be less fearful for their future, whatever that maybe.
You are in the midst of a chronic illness. The effects on daily life is unimaginable. I am dealing with a chronic condition and it is its own hell. Grab the good days, give yourself so much grace and love on the bad days. And keep living. Much love 💖💖💖💖💖
At first I thought I wouldn’t watch to the end because, as a man aged 73 it’s not topical. However, I did. My thoughts are my own. No better or worse than others. I’m pleased you felt you could share.
Thank you for your realness. I struggle every day with fibromyalgia and RSD and Small Fiber neuropathy, which most people aren’t even aware of. I live in severe chronic pain and extreme fatigue every second of every day. I am not being treated with enough relief medication for the day, so I’m still suffering, with no help in sight. It is very lonely because only my immediate family knows my everyday struggles. And a lot of times, I even try to hide from them my pain. I am praying for you, and never give up hope. That’s what I cling to. That and Jesus. ❤
Thank you for your honesty and vulnerability in sharing your story. I cannot begin to understand how difficult this journey must be. Thinking of you ♥️
It takes a lot of courage for someone to share their struggle with infertility, I hope that you turn your hope and faith to the Lord who will direct your steps and give you the desires of your heart 💛🙏🏼
As a cancer survivor, you're right, our illness does not define us. What does define us is the growth we experience and mature into, all of which defines us, so much so that we begin to see how it all blossoms and benefits others as well as ourself. Perhaps that's why God is more interested in our growth than He is in our pain because He knows that our growth is eternal and our pain is temporal. By temporal I mean that life is but a vapor (when compared to eternity). The container we live in is temporary, yet our soul never dies...a concept that's sometimes tough for our mind to grasp. Living in the moment is sometimes all we can handle. 🙏I pray you can travel the path to find natural remedies for both MS and infertility.🙏That your youth will give you the time that's needed to resolve each issue along the way.🙏 Much love from Texas
Thank you for opening up. Thank you for being vulnerable 🩷sending you a virtual hug 🩷 you are so brave for sharing your life’s journey in this public way.
I'm sorry that you are experiencing infertility. It is a hard road to go down. My husband and I went through that for 7 years. We did treatments as well. Finally naturally we conceived our first son and 2.5 years later we were surprised with another son. Praying that your journey will bring about a lovely child, very soon. Love from Canada.
I agree with Kathleen Hunt that we live in a time when so many people feel much more comfortable with superficial conversations and where they aren’t required to show compassion to others who might be going through something they aren’t experiencing themselves. For those of us who have chronic illnesses, especially ones that are debilitating and perhaps not well understood, some people avoid us and even end friendships because they are so “afraid” of what’s wrong with us. This can be very isolating and lonely and I’ve had to reach out a build new relationships so as to stay engaged and connected to others. I’m still a person worth knowing even if my brain doesn’t work quite as well and even if I don’t have as much energy. No doubt others can relate. Thanks for speaking honestly. If you didn’t, we might think your life was perfect.
Been there too, I don’t have MS though, and I’m so sorry you both are going through any of this. Praying for you and your journey. May a beautiful healthy baby be a part of your story. Be kind to yourself and your new body. Thank you for sharing. ❤
Thanks for sharing all of this. My husband and I decided not to ttc because of my health issues for the past 13 years. I've been tested for MS and am seeing a rheumatologist at this point.
It's for women who have decided to stop pursuing pregnancy or adoption. But if you ever need it, Childless Collective has been really helpful for me. It is extremely hard to be surrounded by friends all having babies/raising kids.
I think you're very brave to open up about this, and I definitely don't think you're doing it to try to get attention or anything like that. 💞 I don't believe that any of this is happening because of anything you did or didn't do. I believe what the Bible says about why disease and death came into the world - because of the first sin recorded in Genesis 3. I'm usually not "preachy" in my RUclips comments, but please don't let anyone make you feel like this is your fault. I'll be praying for you 🙏
My son decided to avoid parenthood. He's my only child. He won't be changing his mind. I grieved so for my body's line, cut off after possibly thousands of years of surviving horrific and painful pushing on to LIVE. I am the last female of my line. It's been years and that still makes me cry. I believe we are a partnership of the body, a loyal and true-blue sort of pet, with an indwelling spirit.
I understand how you and Andy feel the tremendous pull to keep your descendants in bodies that come from your wonderful lines. The spirits of your children can inhabit any body that they wish. Perhaps grieve one more time for the long history of your bodies and turn to open your hearts to your child in an alternate body. Save your poor loyal body as much strength as you can by avoiding the childbearing arena.
You have a child waiting to come to their Mom with MS. You and Andy are perfect for their life path.
I knew a boy in high school who had grown up with a bedridden mother he loved enormously. He was a wonderful guy with a great attitude.
If your diagnosis gets in the way of ordinary adoption, there are people who would be glad to accept you. Release the old stress, perk up a bit as you relax, and start opening doors so your dream can begin to come through. You ARE blessed. Open the doors and let the timing take care of itself. This way, you turn the waiting into a celebration of love. Your health will thank you. Hugs and love, with tears in my eyes...
I think your son is brave. Society casts a harsh eye on those of us who opt out of parenting.
My thoughts and prayers are with you. I struggled with infertility years ago, & a more recent diagnosis with MS, but they didn't overlap like yours! I understand the roller coaster of emotions! 😢 Thank you for sharing honestly!
I don’t have issues with infertility but l did have a surprise pregnancy at 39 and he was due on my 40th birthday. MS and motherhood is a challenge. We all have our own battles. Thanks for sharing your story and vulnerability, it’s very courageous of you and appreciated. Hugs from Melbourne, Australia x
Thank you for your courage in sharing this. I really appreciate anyone who is generous with painful experiences in life. It makes life more doable somehow, seeing that being human naturally comes with challenges and there are people who understand & relate to that...& want to be real. I find this kind of connection to be so important & healing. Such a kind & authentic gesture from you. ❤️
Thank you so much for saying this -- it really warmed my heart.
I admire your courage and sharing this. I wouldn't have the courage to do all that with MS. I would just adopt. But that's just my personal feeling on it
Hi Elin, thank you for sharing your tough story. We're bombarded with fake images of happy lives, where being successful is the only thing that matters. But real life is out of our control. I really appreciate your honesty, braveness and authenticity. You're showing us that we can all be a mutual blessing if we stay truly human.❤❤
Love and hugs from Italy💞
How very brave of you to lay it out like this. I am so blessed to have come across your videos. Life is hard and we need to just love each other thru it. My heart hurts for your struggles. Keep on keeping on!
Don’t give up. Without all the details I have been through chronic migraine and infertility tx. I resonated with a lot of the story you shared. When u r in the middle of it it is hard in all of the ways. I agree with your sense that it needs to be spoken out loud so we don’t feel so alone. I also agree that people/ friends / family do not have a frame for talking about it. I’m happy to hear you have a supportive spouse. We ended up luckily having one of my sisters donate her eggs. It worked. My daughter is 21 now and we are very open about our story and how we never gave up. We did have a to adopt but only after we went through all of the medical options. We didn’t use that option after all. I also learned something critical about my migraines during my pregnancy. I didn’t have migraines while pregnant!! So i hope when you are pregnant you will learn something positive or helpful that could help you navigate your MS. Anyways - hang in and thanks for being brave and sharing your truth. ❤
Dear Alin,
I am binge watching, while doin a PILE of dishes because I am desperate to get rid of my clutter.
Then this feed came through. I was like, wonder when this was made…just recently!
Thank you for all your tips and suggestions-I will be implementing!
That being said, I have PCOS. Didn’t know it. Have tried for 33 yrs of marriage to have a baby. Huge family w tons of nieces and nephews, but us w nothing. Yes, I hear you. It’s been really hard. Thought it would get easier w age, I’m 60, but NO. It actually is harder, because children and the legacy becomes so much more precious as we age! Didn’t know that.
So, I have several autoimmune issues. After starting to research the pcos, I found a lot of the ketogenic carnivore drs all find tons of results when we eliminate the processed foods, seed oils and even certain veggies that aggravate these autoimmune symptoms. I have gone carnivore for a season as a “total elimination” to allow my body to heal from the pcos. I AM FEELING SO MUCH BETTER! As that’s why I am able to actually stand here and do the dishes. My clutter is not from hoarding or letting go, but from illness. Unable to do anything but get ready for work and then collapse after-unable to get anything done in the evenings. But that is changing. I don’t think I will have to stay carnivore forever, but I’ve been sick for at least 30 yrs, so I have some mending to do.
So, there is hope! Might wanna look into this and don’t wait 30 yrs to try it.
Also, I have mindsets about being ill and not able to do activities. I need to break these mindsets. I see I have “sickness”thoughts. Would love to hear some tips on these issues dealing w clutter because of illness and building healthy thought patterns.
Please forgive this extremely long comment.
Will keep you and hubby in prayer.
Blessings
Danielle
I feel for you! You really are between a rock and a hard place😱. Child rearing with MS is completely exhausting …every day. But what is one to do? Young, female and wanting a family…
Good luck with your journey and I wish you well. I only found out that I had MS after the first child, although I had it prior to the first and was not diagnosed on initial presentation. The second child happened when my MS appeared to settle after four years. It was a gamble and everything went well, but it was a worry. I didn’t have fertility problems so I didn’t have that extra burden. Warmest regards from Perth Western Australia
Medicine has a lot of biases, for woman, trans peopel, black people, and I think this kind of conversation helps to fight agains it. Hope you are fine and send you a lot of love ❤
Feeling same way about my perimenopause now. I know what u mean. People only want to hear the good not the hard in society it seems. My first pregnancy second trimester miscarriage was super hard too and I felt like no one wanted to hear about it. Feeling your pain❤️❤️❤️
Hugs to you. This community is always here for you
Hugs Elin, praying for you and your husband in this. Our son and daughter in law struggle with infertility and have done for a long time. It’s invisible unless you’re close but it affects so many.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I can relate to your lexperience so much as someone who is also experiencing infertility and dealing with an autoimmune disease. I have undifferentiated connective tissue disease and the daily fatigue can be so debilitating at times that I often think that I’m not meant to be a mother. When I received my diagnosis I also thought that this is probably why I wasn’t able to have children because I wouldn’t be able to take care of a baby with this condition. I’m currently taking a break from fertility treatment but I am still hopeful that my health will improve enough for me to continue trying. I wish you all the best ❤
Thank you for sharing a new (to us) part of your personal journey. As someone with health issues too I get the most out of these videos. I hope that didn’t sound insensitive. I’m so sorry you are going through this. I truely hope you are able to realise your dreams of having a baby in whichever way you can x
Elin, I love you and enjoy listening to your voice at bedtime. I have benefited greatly from your channel. I wish I could share some of my comfort with you. My husband and I never happened to have children. It doesn’t bother either one of us that it never happened. I hope it happens for you because you want it so much. I don’t feel like something bad happened to me that I didn’t happen to have children. Just blessed to have a happy home. 💕
Wow, I’m so glad I found this video. A true gift as I have MS as well and thinking about having a child. ❤
You are an amazing human being and the reason why we are here is to listen to your story and to learn from your life experiences. You can talk about anything and everything that inspires you to be the best version of yourself. It is scary to share so much of your personal life, but it helps best to talk so that you can realize that you are not alone in your journey. I have two autoimmune diseases that have stopped me from getting pregnant, and you have described exactly what I have gone trough. So what you might think of as over sharing, to me is a blessing because I know I’m not alone. And neither are you! So by you sharing your life story, you inspire all of us! Thank you 🙏🏽
Long time ago ( 25 years now), I had been diagnosed with the autoimmune disease. At the same time, I desperately wanted a baby. It was and obviously still is, the lack of support from medical professionals that was a problem on top of my problem...to cut it short- my girl is 24 years old, perfect in every way. Keep fighting for what your hart want! I am sure it will happen for you and your husband. Lot's of love from across the world 🇷🇸
Your transparency and openness will be used and blessed. I can only offer the most I can give you and that is my promise that I will pray for you. I relate to much more of what you said. You are a beautiful soul! 💕🌸
I have POTS and secondary infertility.
We do have one child but couldn’t have more.
Thank you for sharing your heart!
Thank you for opening up and sharing your story! I can't imagine trying to juggle all of this at one time. You are such a beautiful soul, and we appreciate all of your videos. I am sending you a virtual hug. We never know what others are struggling with daily, so we all need to be kind to each other. ❤
Thank you so much for the kind words. Seriously, they mean a lot. And you are so right about not knowing about what others struggle with. ❤
I just stumbled across your decluttering videos, which I am going through right now. I liked it, so I clicked on your page. My heart goes out to you in your infertility struggle, as well as your MS diagnosis.
I struggled with infertility for many years. We finally decided to adopt, and now we are the parents of 16 and 19 year old beautiful amazing young women. Please don’t overlook how many wonderful children need parents who will love and care for them. It is the biggest blessing the Lord has given us.
I will keep you and your husband in my prayers.❤
It's saddening to see this topic shifted away from and to see you're going through this time. Thank you for being brave despite the hitch in your voice. You are talking about something a ton of women go through. My sister is wanting children but every time she has gotten pregnant the fetuses don't survive. Not even long enough to be born. It's heartbreaking to see. I know you are struggling with the situation. So much is going on. Wish only peace for you during these difficult times.
How sweet you are,i watched tons of your videos and liked you so much and now..i'm finding you are so brave too.I'm praying for you and your husband:be strong
For most women MS goes away when they are pregnant, and comes back after you give birth. Pregnancy is amazing for women’s body.
Thank you for sharing ❤ It's so helpful bring awareness and especially helpful to others who may have the same struggles. ❤
Your such a sweetheart! God bless you. Pray
It’s difficult to know what to write without it sounding patronising, or glib, or being accidentally insensitive but here goes:-)
That was a very brave video for you to create and it must have taken a lot of courage. Coping with infertility must be so traumatic - especially when many of your peers are starting, or have families. Many people would suggest adoption or surrogacy but as with all things, it has to be you and your husbands decision as to whether or not to go down that route. Whatever happens, I hope that everything works out well for you. Best wishes Em xx
Thank you for your openness regarding these topics.
I have several friends who experienced infertility.
Thank you for sharing! 💕 As someone who also has been going through a fertility journey, it's very comforting to know I'm not alone in this. I appreciate you having the courage and strength to share your story when others may not. You mentioned that feeling of being split into two sets of emotions at the same time joy but yet wonder when it will be your time when a friend or family member becomes pregnant. I couldn't relate more. 😢 I'm so tired of hearing "it will happen when it's meant to happen" (even more heartretching after the many mcs ive had. 😭
I hope you get your family, you and your husband have longed for. 💕 Sending prayers, good vibes your way! Hope to see more of your videos!
My heart goes out to you. I appreciate how frustrating your situation is and applaud you for sharing your health struggles with others in the same situation. Hopefully it will help others.
I love that you shared this. I can't begin to understand the difficulty of MS and infertility at the same time. I know what it feels like to be the only one without a baby and that is super painful. My sisters-in-law were all having multiple children, and I was happy for them, but I couldn't even hold the babies without feeling sick inside. Thankfully, after 4 years, I was blessed with a son, and 3 years later, another one. I absolutely think people need to hear these stories! Those who are in your situation do need to know they are not alone, and everyone else needs to hear your perspective to raise awareness and empathy! Many prayers for you!!
I appreciate you sharing your story with us. ❤ It must be difficult to open your heart to the world, but I believe you will help others this way.
Thank you so much ❤
I love when you do these opening up videos soo much. You are someone with such a good energy for me. And, no one who follows you/knows you would ever think you're posting this for attention. The lack of medical research on female bodies is really real. I love how you pointed out the niche of: infertility *with* chronic illness. I really recommend this channel to you: Della Vlogs (lots of touching, powerful infertility content). They are my absolute feel-good.
You are not alone. It is always okay to share if you are comfortable. In fact, I think it is so positive to share as other people who are struggling with the same issues don’t feel alone. My daughter and son in-law tried to have children for years, had infertility issues and finally sought help. It is painful and watching my daughter go through it is hard for me , her mom, as well. My heart goes out to you. Don’t give up. God is in control. Our bodies are unique.
I really feel this. I am made to feel uncomfortable about my medical condition and it's frowned upon for me to mention it. But sometimes people will ask why I didn't do something or can't do it and the medical condition is the answer. I've been made fun of for walking with a cane since my 20s and there needs to be more understanding of disabilities in our society. Thank you for sharing ❤
Sending you strength to get through these difficult times. So many people share unhelpful or hurtful advice/opinions with people going through infertility (and also chronic illness). A lot of people prefer not to talk about either issue when they’re going through it, not just because it’s deeply personal and very tender but also because people say such insensitive things, or don’t know what to say. You’re not alone and hopefully talking about this will help others in similar circumstances.
You are so brave! Infertility is such a difficult issue ... I am crying for you. ❤❤❤
My heart goes out to you for so many reasons. You are both brave and wise to have made this video. I think it will help both you and many of your followers a great deal. If it does turn out that you will have to make a life without the family you want so badly, I’m sure you’ll make the best of it for yourself and others. But don’t give up yet! It may very well happen when you’re least expecting it. ❤
I also agree it can seem like people don’t want to hear our health struggles. I think the problem lays in the fact that unless you’ve gone through the specific issue it can be extremely hard to truely understand. Also people instinctively feel like they need to offer solutions and that can be uncomfortable for them when there are no solutions. For us, often we just want to be heard and feel like we are heard. So maybe it’s a communication mismatch.
My heart went out to you when you talked about friends talking about pregnancy and you feeling like you can’t or shouldn’t talk about your situation. It reminded me of when people say to me “I’m so fatigued” while I’m sat here with MECFS with my life actually debilitated from fatigue. It’s not quite the same I know but I think it makes us both feel invisible.
Never be afraid to take up space Elin, your journey is as important as anyone else’s.
Keep doing what you are doing, you are a very sweet lady, this should not be happening to you😢, I always keep you in my prayers, I pray for a good outcome❤❤
Although is different, I agree and feel your situation because I am goin trough menopause symptoms and because my sister and mother had cancer, I have very little options to help with all these symptoms. So yea, is scary and the frustration is just huge. Thank you for sharing😍 is good to talk and reflect. I do have a wonderful supportive family to be thankful for too, that’s good🌸😍
Thank you for sharing! I embrace you. You are so strong. It takes balls to be open about yourself.
You are a beautifully honest and compassionate person. Thank you for sharing your personal journey with us. Never-say-never my dear. Every new day brings new hope. If you believe in good karma, then you probably have earned THOUSANDS of 'good karma' points! 😄 The universe reciprocates assorted blessings randomly. I'm sending positive thoughts your way...💭💞✨️
You inspire me. You are so strong and beautiful. I wish you all the best with this and hope that things will get better soon ❤
❤ i relate so hard to this. Thank you so much for making this video.
Aylynne, you are a beautiful,demure and kindly young woman. The way you’ve just shared your life to your audience is an inspiration. Clearly your demeanour will make you a wonderful mother. Sending blessings to both you and Andy. Wishing you good health and good luck moving positively forward 🙏🏼
I recently binge watched your videos and the documentary “What the Health”.. So I wonder what your diet looked like… because there’s a mention of MS in the documentary. I admire your openness… We find that very hard in our corner of the world.
Elin...thank you for being vulnerable and brave...not easy...a couple of things...I have a friend who was struggling with infertility at the same time as another diagnose..what she wound up doing was going to a place called nutritional healing and they draw vials of blood send off for testing and essentially they then have a road map nutritionally how to help, and it made a huge difference for her and she believes made a difference in her physical and so her body could feel better and get pregnant. Also my niece said that her low progesterone made it challenging for her to get pregnant. Perhaps this may help...perhaps you've already been down these roads....
a very poignant and relatable video elin ❤. I think our society has become too comfortable and indifferent to suffering, thus lacking the courage and compassion to deal with it when they see it. we want to keep things nice and happy, but like you said, we need to make more space for these things. its not like sick people need all the sympathy in the world, but even just a moment of recognition, that friend that ask "how is your health? how are you fairing? " etc. means the absolute world.
I am so hearing you through all of this. Absolutely everything you say I am "Amen-ing!!!" Just got up to "so blessed" and yup, I felt "so cursed" and like I was being punished when I always thought I did everything right. And the exclusive conversations and complaints about being a parent where I was just crawling up and dying thinking I would give anything to be a parent. We tried for seven years. I had three miscarriages. One ended in emergency surgery because it was ectopic. We didn't do IVF as we're Catholic and to be honest, despite that I'd had so much trauma with our fertility journey I think it would have broken me. I also live in New Zealand and adoptions here just do not happen. There was one in the region where I lived last year. People abort. But a lot keep their babies because there's a lot of social support and not really much stigma about being a single Mum - which is a good thing! We tried embryo adoption and all six embryos we adopted died. All the while friends were having babies with ease. Like you we didn't try for a baby straight away as we married in our mid twenties. So by the time we got to the end of our fertility journey I had turned 42. And there was a happy end for us. We matched with another couple for embryo adoption and I got pregnant and my boy was born in July 2019. He had to be C sectioned out because I got pre eclampsia. But what amazes me is that while we were trying and having so much sadness, he was waiting in frozen storage for us the whole time! We desperately wanted a sibling for him but sadly the remaining embryo from his donors didn't work out. We've been on the waitlist for more embryos but I had surgery yesterday to check out some irregular bleeding and the doctor told me I would likely need a hysterectomy as she suspects I have ore cancerous cells. I'm pretty sad about that. Your video has made me feel less alone. I found the not knowing if things would ever work out and if I would ever be a Mama the hardest thing of all. And yes, when I was going through the struggle it felt like everyone was pregnant. I am so hopeful that you and your husband will have that little baby waiting for you. Thank you so much for sharing this. And I think we all need to speak out about infertility because it's there and it's real and so many of us are struggling 💕
Hi! You are not alone. My sister tried having a baby for ten years, with fertility issues on both sides of the couple. Lastly the husband was diagnosed with prostate cancer and had to do surgery and they were about to give up with having a baby. But luckily they tried that last time and now she is about to have a baby girl with 40 years after 10 years of search. We dont know if it was the radioactivity boost or what but this week we should meet the little girl after knowing all the pain they had to endure. I feel you, hang on and above all you are not alone ❤ big hug from argentina
Visibility is huge as someone with chronic illness. And I know friends with infertility and miscarriages feel the same. It's helpful to know you're not alone, and also to get ideas for coping and/or treatment. And to see there are people who will listen and walk through the bad stuff with you. Sometimes we don't give our people enough credit and assume they don't want to hear it without actually trying. I wouldn't be surprised if someone sees this who's doctor said there's no MS treatment while pregnant, and now knows there are options they can ask for. I'm glad you have good support and wish you the best for your health and family.
I know this is a personal video on difficult issues, but you skin looks amazing and absolutely glowing!🥰
Thank you for being brave enough to share. I would of liked kids but my chronic illness (CFS/ME) made me unable to find someone to have kids with, I've pasted that stage of life now. It's also something that doesn't get talked about and if I bring it up very few people understand so I don't, it's hard. Another thing I think should be talked about more are miscarriages, real life is really hard, messy and a lot of time tragic but not many people want to see that, it's too painful. Wishing you both all the very best and hope good times come your way. Take care.
Although I’m dealing with something very different, this video made me feel so seen. I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes earlier this year and it has been such a roller coaster of emotions, especially grief over what I thought my life would look like. Similar to your condition my diagnosis involved a 2-day hospital stay in May and I’m still watching all of the bills come in, and it’s hard to convey just how awful it feels to not only have to make multiple decisions a day that will have lasting impacts on my health while also paying so much money just to stay alive. There’s a certain solidarity that chronically ill people share and it doesn’t fix anything but it is nice to feel less alone ❤
Thanks for sharing! ❤ Hopefully you can cope with the trauma you lived through and deal with the cards life handed to you. (I have PCOS and can feel the pain of not getting pregnant for years.)
I am so sorry you have been dealing with these two issues!! But I do feel like it is a blessing in disguise that you didn't get pregnant and it is probably your body's way of telling you not to do it. You need to make YOUR health a priority for you and your husband. It is difficult to adjust your expectations but you can do it and have a happy life without children. I know MANY women (myself included) that don't have children and they are living very rich and happy lives. Take care and I will be sending positive vibes. Hugs!
YOU are amazing, and so brave! Thank you for sharing - wish you all the best. Sending love and warm vibes your way 💕
I hope so badly that you can have a baby! I had endometriosis and was told I may never be able to conceive. But I had 4 pregnancies, and had a miscarriage and then a pair of twins stillborn. I know some of your pain.
Thank you for your bravery! You're so blessed to have a wonderful husband. 💛
You are a beautiful and courageous young woman. Thank you for sharing with us!
Thank you so much for sharing this! Sending you all the love I can from Argentina! ❤
Thank you very much for sharing. I feel you and I admire your openness to raise awareness. Sending love ❤
Never feel guilty about sharing your health problems. To those of us who also struggle with our health it's incredibly helpful to know we're not alone in this. Personally I've suffered from Long Covid for the past 2 and a half years so I can definitely relate to the fatigue and the struggle to find medication that works. And then most treatments and medications aren't covered by insurance in my country because there isn't enough research proving their effectiveness. I think as a society we need to make the medical struggles that so many of us face more visible. So eventually there will be more research and treatments made available.
Thanks for sharing. I have a family member dealing with this issue, so difficult! Hugs ❤
Sending love and support. You are a very brave woman. You are stronger than you think. We see your strength every day in your videos. ❤
Wow, thank you. ❤
We appreciate you being so open about this ❤
Sending love and hugs to you - thanks for sharing a topic that is so raw and close to your heart
You have such a positive outlook when you have been dealt a difficult hand. I really admire your attitude and openness regarding your struggles. You seem like a really lovely person and I wish the best for you ❤
Hi Elin, I’m in MN too. May I suggest contacting Mother Moon Acupuncture? Meghan is so calming and amazing, I truly believe the treatments I received there were a huge help in the conception of my son 6 years ago. I know suggestions on this subject aren’t always fun to hear, but really, I had gone through infertility treatments and medications, all unsuccessful, then fell pregnant 4 months after starting at Mother Moon. Thank you for sharing your story! ✨