Twenty years of being lovebombed , gaslit , devalued and then hoovered again , to the point where I lost nearly all my identify , self worth and confidence ! A devastating pandemic and one more toxic jab too many and I called it quits ! One year of no contact later , still healing and finding my feet , but every day it gets a little bit easier ! Great video 👍 , the more people learn about these creatures the better they can be armed to recognise the red flags before they get sucked in ! Keep up the good work 😎😎
Welcome and thank you The Big H.. it’s great to have you here in the community. Glad you are away from the narcissist and improving yourself. I appreciate you sharing ☀️🙏🙌
When you decide to go no contact with these people, you also have to leave them emotionally. No more emotions about them. No matter what happens. Leave them emotionally. Stop wasting emotions on the people who already wasted so much of your life.
Best way to break the Spell is to not talk about them. It ends their lust for attention good or bad. Choose Peace of mind by evicting them from our head space to Heal!
Videos like these are valuable to our healing process and contribute to our well-being mentally, spiritually, emotionally, physically. Truly grateful for these words of advice.
Not going back this time. I went back 3 times, and it escalated faster and faster to the discard. This time I'm taking real action by blocking him on everything, not going to places I know he goes. It's not easy, but time will heal. Thank you Andrew. ♥️
DITTO! Went back 3-4× ... had no idea what a FAKETARD he was. I wish him the BEST with his other supplies & flying monkeys 🐒 .... I GOT GOD & it's so empowering to know I am able to LOVE ❤️ You were so on breaking me like you did your other women b4 me.....
We have to remember that in the spiritual realm, these people are just vessels with entities working in them to devour, destroy and yes, kill. Go back and you’ll start to notice yourself become more frail, sicker and desperate. Then the trauma bond gets thicker and you’re caught in their web. It’s not worth it, and you’ll essentially lose your identity and God knows what else. Stay AWAY and learn to love yourself. Once you heal and ask for God’s protection, you’ll never have to experience this again. Love y’all! ❤️
GOD bless you very true they are devil's very much into distressing us hurting us and everything that is evil guide your heart and mind heal and pray to God he brought us here to Andrew to get healing through Andrew's teaching we will all heal together ❤️
@@gabrielleaumont3971 Omg yes I actually read about this 😭 sucking the blood from our vains,my friend said to me when you kill a vampire you must stab it in the heart to kill it so this is our job to make the break final...
The thing is..,these narcissistic people do black spells on the daily. It took about 2 years for this spell to wear off. I’m still healing. Once you healed…don’t go back. This person made my life a living hell at one point. Exactly right.❤️
You would be so proud of me Andrew. The day I went no contact…I stayed no contact. It gives me a sense of power, closure, strength and focus. I cry…I ruminate, I get dreams…but I never break no contact. 🙏🏻We will talk soon🙏🏻
I am in the mourning stages of the end. I am not mourning the lack of that malignant narcissist, I am mourning what I thought could be. What I thought could be was fueled by the love bombing. I had no idea, whatsoever, what he was doing. He did. I happily filled in all of the blanks, he added the fuel, and I believed it. After I started listening to you, and learning about the dangers of narcissists, I felt like I had been poisoned by him. This is a long recovery, but what I learned was invaluable. I emerged stronger than ever. Thank you again, Andrew for the unvarnished truth. God bless you for all you do for all of us.
@@wendythomas4930 Hi Wendy, completely recovered. Lord, what a journey. Grateful for the lessons learned and the changes that resulted from that mercifully brief dance with the devil. Stay the course-its well worth it!
ANDREW!!! I left two weeks ago and went no contact last week. I watch your videos every day and you are an angel!!! I am sticking strong, getting my friends back, and loving life already. When I have doubts I watch your videos and then go “Yeah!!! I am strong powerful human and he has no hold on me anymore nor will he ever again!” So thanks. :)
Reece! this is also what im going through! i had temporary moments of insanity, i was angry and cursed him blocked and unblocked several times, but now i am actually OVER HIM and happy that i broke the spell. He was never going to change and after 4years of physical, emotional abuse, i am slowly regaining my power, getting back my friends and the person i was before i met the Narc,
It’s a spell and a curse! Three months free of her and I am still in pain over the whole thing. My head still spinning and heart hurting. EVEN THOUGH I know I am better off - free of the abuse. Even though there is no way I would ever go back to that relationship. Some days are better than others. Today isn’t one of them.
Hi Andrew. Yes, I was under his spell, but thank God, I'm out of it, and FREE. It took a long time and WORK to get out of it, and once you're out, NEVER GO BACK TO A NARCISSIST! IT GETS WORSE! I went into Therapy, read self help books and I blocked my phone #, got off Facebook, and I moved. Never heard from him again in 11.3 years. It works! You WILL get over him. TIME breaks the spell. ONLY YOU can make this happen.
OMG YES! Completely their dreams and their supply. After 34+yrs of giving, I cut the ties. Went back for x 6mo AND left again. It’s been VERY hard and completely confusing and horrible time. Recovery has taken a long, long time but so glad I had the strength do do it for myself. Hang in there for anyone reading this!! YOU will make it!! Hold tight to yourself, find support. You can do it. Andrew is so right. 💝💝
I got sucked back in because I left the door open a little bit. Very soon the cycle started again. Rinse wash repeat … I stopped it in its tracks because it was unbelievable and got much worse. I left under the worst circumstances believe me. You can do it. BLOCK THEM.
I really like how emphatic you are here Andrew, you show how much you care for the people who you're sharing your healing journey with. You're very wise and strong to have chosen a path and stuck to it and you are proof that it pays to do this as oppose to exploring the dangerous path of returning
Once you know you go you get out and you stay out. This is so true 👍 no contact is the only way, their nothing but predators that's all they are, listen to this dude, I've been there done that 🙏 to Jesus to fight all your battle's and he will, you just have to step up and go no contact and block them on everything and it will break the trauma bond slowly, but you must stay no contact and stop the emotional thinking about them their nothing but a demon 👿.
I have been no contact fid 18 months. I keep thinking/ feeling he will try and hoover me back. He lives a 15 mins drive away. I keep educating myself praying for the strength to silently ignore him turn my back and protect my energy. I feel I am getting obsessed with the need to protect myself because evil is strong. I will be victorious x
@@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlone I needed help to understand after i was blocked ... i would have done anything at that time to understand..i was very cofused ok..He said he would help but he was worse!
It's more like going cold turkey, trauma bonding is a highly addictive, the push/pull creates a cocktail mix of hormones similar to a cocaine high. You can't simply wave a wand to break that spell, you have to go thru physical withdraws of having just one more fix for months of no contact before you can begin to break the spell.
Excellent Andrew! I went back too many times over a 5 year period. It was all a waste of time. No more! Yes it was like a spell and as you explain they draw us in. No more! Thanks!
This business of going back “on average” x amount of times…. Omg I foolishly went back SO MANY TIMES. It was like clockwork. Every 3-4 weeks that cycle was repeated…. most definitely given permission by ME. Their many types of supply is evident. AA provides a narc a crazy supply of OTHER NARCS! I am done. 2016 is when this all started. DONE.
the narcissist I have been free off for a week now would RAGE for hours if I had an opinion that differed from his, he would try to talk circles around me, attempt to baffle me with long words and basically try to wear me down and mentally drain me until I gave in...but not the last time :) a week ago a stood my ground, I stuck to my guns and I refused the argument I said it was over- he sent a long winded venom laced reply and I simply deleted it and blocked him. i was so bored of having my words invalidated and stepped on. i finally thought- 'I have a brain in my head, it's not just in there to keep the wind from whistling between my ears'- so I shut him down and this past week has been BLISS! my phone is quiet, my anxiety has all but vanished, my sleep pattern has returned to normal and I no longer feel like I have to apologise just to break tension- that guy is a 46 year old throwing tantrums that a bratty toddler would be embarrassed by, life is too short to be plagued by emotion sucking vampires
THIS is the tough love that I need today, tomorrow and yesterday. Thank you for reminding me of my value as an Empath and the fact that it was JUST a spell that an evil person placed on me and breaking it is COMPLETELY within my control. I have the power to change this by holding fast to my commitment of NO CONTACT. Keep up the good work. Your beautiful spirit and enduring kindness are changing lives in numbers that are likely far more than you will ever know. 💕
absolute truth!!!!! just few hours without narc i feel total different person...i feel M E! happy to be me! he was aware and he🧐 said different person came back to him, so we should never separate😥😬😨again⛓🔐
I need to get empowered Andrew. I know I need to end the cycle and take the action. Your videos which I recently discovered have helped. I started to think I was mistaken and over thinking. Deep down I know the truth. I will break the spell. Thank you 😊
It has taken me 17 years to heal, I speak my truth. I went for all the love bombing and discards for 10 years, until I FINALLY figured out who I was with.
Yep.....all so true, Andrew. They literally strip you of everything....it is all about them. Their behaviour controls you in so many ways...the fear they want to install in you is appalling. I felt I was under a spell and still am in someway even after leaving. Day by day I'm working on healing....day by day I'm clearing their spell.
Was a brief but highly intense "relationship". I knew exactly what he was from the start, but really was under a "spell". Was thrilled by him, on every level. Knew what I was doing. Did it anyway. Was dream-like while it was happening. Almost all love-bombing. No maliciousness in him at all, and I was watching closely for it to surface. After awhile, began to notice subtle changes in his attention level. Saw blatant evidence of manipulation attempts, which I resisted. Breaking point came. I needed a minor medical procedure. He never even texted to see how I was. I brought it up. Was met with a barrage of excuses, but no sincere care. That was the beginning of the end. I made a decision to end it. Left abruptly, no real explanation. But carried affection for him for many months, despite the jarring glimpse I had into who he really was. Been a year and there remains a great divide within me, between what I KNOW intellectually (after copious research and learning)...and how I FEEL. Can't seem to extinguish the affection. That memory of the initial bliss phase is so intoxicating, even now. He's no good. That's clear. Would never go back. But a form of a spell remains. Leaves me feeling stuck.
Was in the same condition...love him to bits..... did not love him ...but the idea of him what i though and what he represented..... sometimes i feel like my soul is dying for him...i wish he was real..but he is not...i completely understand your pain....do not supress your pain....feel it..let it come.....in the weak moments remind yourself of his reality...and watch such videos....cognitive dissonace is what we are trying to break...... because that person we loved his body is present...we are trying to find him in their body.... but they are not real.....just an illusion mixed with lies and manipulation..... would love to hear what helps you heal...... god has hold our hand to take us out of the grip of that demon.... always think about what life would have been with him if you did not left...we all are togeather in this ...you are not alone.
I just wrote you a detailed, lengthy reply and it didn't go through. :(. In brief, thanks for your supportive comment. Much time has gone by and I feel much better. You asked what helped me to heal? It was time and distance. Definitely the complete absence of contact with him. I grieved what I thought I had. I saw clearly what I actually had (nothing). I accepted that I ignored my own intuitive prompts and jumped headlong into "excitement" (which masquerades as such, but is actually very close to anxiety). I traded my own priorities for his beauty and his romantic rhetoric (both meaningless without substantial depth). Actions speak volumes. Not pretty illusions. I am very clear now on what that whole thing was. I'm even grateful that it happened, because it brought me to a new awareness. Now when I meet people, I see the whole context of what is there. I silently measure their words, motivations, behavior. And I am most clear about my own intrinsic value. Would not compromise that again, ever, especially not for a whimsical thrill. Fantasy has it's place in paperback novels. Reality is where we all live though. Thanks again, and good luck to you.
@@rainflower5874 hey you, thank you for the reply it helped me a lot.... i want to share somethings which i though might help you..... after this abuse we become observer like a third person of not only others but most importantly ourself ..it is almost like we are detached from our body and see our self for who we we are what we want..what are the wrong habits and traits we have and what are our strengths. .. preety superpower to have don't you think ;) ....another thing whenever get confuse between two things between logic and feeling.... always see for how you body feels about certain decision...people and we ourself can deceive and manipulate our logic and feelings to get what we want not what we need...but how our body feels can never be wrong... it keeps score subconsciously of every right or wrong since birth.... while taking a big decision how we feel guilty or not ...anxious or not ...calm and peaceful thinking about it or not... discomfort is ok... it is required for growth .... third one is know your personality type..i am an infj...it helps you understand or decode your self better.... frank james videos are good.... fourthly when you an counters people with npd...just remember...if they can stand with their lies so strongly its our duty to stand even with more strenght with the truth..... certain people are protector of truth...that's how earth still have humanity... donot only live but thrive in your life... do more than what you thought you will before that person came in life because now we are emotionally and intellectually stronger than ever.... god prepares those with specials gifts and chosen ones to go through hell to understand the beauty of heaven on earth.... and serve a special purpose on earth.... i know my friend after narcissistic abuse sometimes it feels like...you have died once and you rember the painfull death of your past life and you are rebirthed again with all that past meomory... to live with... excuss my english mistakes not my native language... but hope got what i trying to convey... you are already a highly empathetic and intellctual person i can tell... but thought somethings out of this might help you.... after all we all are children of one and here to help each other.....may god give you all the happiness and heal your soul forver.
I’m not being lured in or getting involved with the narc again. Looking at them online doesn’t bother me bcoz the narc was only online. My healing has been going quite well as I realized a year ago what a narc is and I have busy life and family. Narc coaches Jesse & Dave have helped me learn and understand. 🥰
Thank you for your video Andrew. Oh yes I broke that spell. I will always remember Easter gone. I was in lighting a candle and I prayed to the Sacred Heart. I asked the Lord to please direct me in my life. I didn't realize at the time I was being devalued but I knew something was off. Days later my gut instinct knew this evil soulless creature was indeed lying to me. He was cheating on me with probably a number of supplies. I have begun a new life Andrew. The old me is gone. I educate myself now all of the time. Peace has begun to enter my life. Lisa
I had a similar experience. God bless you . Even when confronted he denied and blame shifted then slandered me then "punished" me for not allowing him to gaslight me. He wanted me to take back that i said he had cheated. Yet it was the truth. He is a pathological liar. I pray for his soul and thank God for breaking the soul tie.
you are very brave and very strong, always were (perhaps didn't know it). You are a survivor. Bless you, stay strong count your blessings, live a beautiful life.
He mad me angry at myself for nothing I did but trying to understand his sickness,freedom is great everyday my life is mine unless I choose to share it again!!😎
Thank you. Before I knew about narcissism I was already under the spell, I had even said to her that she had put a spell on me. I didn’t realise what was going on. The times when we weren’t together she was the first thing on my mind when I woke, the last thing before I slept and in my mind throughout the day. I was counting the time till we would see each other or speak and for me it was too long. I took my phone with me everywhere just in case I missed a message or call - although they rarely came. After nearly four months it is still so hard and she thinks that she can whistle and I will come running, I don’t know if this would be the case or not. The only thing that is helping at the moment is the fact that she is out of the country at the moment. I hope she doesn’t come back for some time. I know she will I just hope that I am strong enough to say no.
I can totally relate to your story. I was the same, my phone was attached to me in case he rang or needed me. I went no contact 18 months ago but that is not the end. They still have the power to return, when they want , to manipulate and lie to get our energy again. It's hard to turn your back to them , ignore them and not let them trigger a reaction. We have to realise we hold all the good power in this battle and it will always win over evil. Be that different person who now thinks of self love only ❤ I will overpower him if he returns . X
I totally understand this! I lost my lovely husband of 23 years marriage, 6 years ago and remember feeling at the time that I didn’t care about anything, other than my (adult) children, including myself for at least 18 months, until my ex appeared, he must have thought his birthdays had come all at once, and slowly over the next couple of years he manipulated and lied to me, I then let him move into my lovely home, where I saw the real him dipping in and out, which was the biggest shock , I’d been living in a protective bubble !! I realised he wasn’t the person I thought he was and literally one day threw him out , i questioned some of his actions and he ran , literally ran off !!!! I do feel that he did think I’d calm down and he would yet again hoover me up, saying I was overthinking things, too sensitive, he couldn’t. Yes,I loved him with all my heart , something I said I wouldn’t ever do again after losing my husband as couldn’t cope, but I did I let him into my heart and he abused my love, kindness and heart. I could use the phrase he was a user and do to friends /family who don’t understand the complexity of narcissism but he is so much worse than that !! My feelings are still very raw, and i do remember the feeling of the knight in shining armour saving me , but he wasn’t, he was feeding off my pain and sorrow 🥲 I’m so strong now, yes I cry, but I enjoy every minute of every day, and realise now that everyone comes with a warning . My message in writing this is that everything can change in a breath so , Enjoy , keeping smiling , you can get through it, time is a healer, be kind to yourself, love to you all 🥰
You said something very important the narcissist fed off your pain and sorrow. These demons sense your need and they reflect it back onto you. They'll morph into anything to get what they want.
I have wondered when this transition occurred. For me it was wanting something I had. So one transgression after another ignored or thought of as temporary. She was grieving a loss, but so was I. The thing is a narc grieves differently. Agression, rage, an entitlement to be the exception that death defeated, genuine compassion seen as pandering. Everyone's empathy for that loss fades as all are treated like shit. But you as a primary are invested deep. Your company wanted only for supply and for them to avoid sitting with themselves when all others have burned out. You mistake wanting your attention for affection. But in clear, clear hindsight, there wasn't anything in common. Just a happenstance meeting. Most things repulsed me and my beliefs. But yes Andrew, it can be called a spell. A mirage. A ruse. You have to be fed up way past tolerances that those not invested in the 'spell' would have already been long gone.
I needed to hear this right at this moment. Thankyou for everything beautiful Andrew 🙏 you are helping me to get stronger every day 🌺🌸 love and light to all survivors. We will get there 🙏
Great absolutes at the end He didnt love me. He wont change. He will take much. Yes Thanks for the great advice my Dad gave me that it wont get better. Right why would I put myself in that position again.
If he/she is indifferent it means he/she has another supply. Line-up your ducks and then go no contact. If they've become indifferent that means they fell in destiny's trap. If you try to outsmart destiny or feel you're more empathic, destiny will burn you and the narcissist.
Andrew , I let the narcissist go 10 years ago and it took that amount of time to break the spell. I had to review your channel everyday to free myself and I thank you for that. It's a lot of work and I did it and continue to move forward. I was down, lost and worked my way through the healing process. It wasn't easy. As you said, I had to go through it and it was worth it. Action is key. He died 2019.
Thank you Andrew for so accurately describing the zombie like spell the narc puts us in with the mind games they play on us, which increasingly get worse and hook us deeper. Your description is so accurate that it reminds me I never want to go there again. The push pull creates a trauma bond that we become addicted to from 3 internal chemicals emitted in our bodies which cause us to become addicted to them, that is the spell. I want off the zombie gerbal wheel and never go back. Your videos are so helpful. Thank you!
Oh yes That’s exactly how I saw it but Thank God he broke that curse , that spell was broken . Yes They are parasites from hell . Oh but I am so free now with exception of their long lasting sting. Like they want that sting to last you a life time
I totally agree, Andrew. Entirely! And when you get the 'soft discard', I call it 'the wedge' technique (the Narcissist wants to avoid giving CLOSURE and they try to keep the door 'wedged open' for their return), then it becomes your job to give the Narcissist strong closure. I did this, then walked away. YOU have to give the Narcissist strong CLOSURE then walk away, and I mean RELOCATE and BLOCK indefinitely!!!!!!!!!!!! There's no 'half-way-house' with this! There just isn't is the 'plain truth'. I'm starting not to care now. Its finally wonderful!!!!!!!!!! I'm more logically minded and have trained my mind to interrupt unhelpful emotional thinking with logical thinking based upon radical acceptance and disgust. You have to treat this as WAR defending yourself.
WoW, News Flash . Well said, Real Said, and REAL FACTS. Thanks for Saying it Like it is. I learn better and do better when things aren't sugar coated. It sparks something in me to Ignite Change, more change and sticking with my new desecions. I really want to see at the End of this journey, well I want to meet at the End of my new path, that version of me that got lost, the person I should have Experienced ALL these YEARS, can't wait to meet Her.
Hi Andrew! Thank God for your videos and taking the time to make them. . I’ve been missing my ex even though I know going back is not an option. Your videos help me toughen up and ground myself again. God bless you🙏🏻
Thank you for help me understand who I was dealing for he left one week ago I'm accepting the was over but still hurting I know I'm gonna be ok just gonna take time but I'm willing to feel better
Wow, when i read my reply from almost a year ago, what a difference i feel. I feel more "charged up," more alive. I ALWAYS believed in TIME. My Therapist always told me how important TIME is, and she was right. Today, i feel like a new person, and NOBODY can actually hurt me like that anymore. I run from narcissists, and refuse to be involved with Toxic people who are so self-centered that they hold on to every single word you say, and make something BAD out of it. These people are hurting and struggling everyday, but it's not their fault. I choose to follow my dreams and protect my heart. NO TOXIC PEOPLE ALLOWED!🚫
You've helped me so much last 7 days.Im s 57 year old man a good soul I met her on a dating site her house was like her rotten she didn't even have a washing machine and innlots of debt I fell for her because I felt sorry for her little game I thought she was depressed there was red flags sirens blaring houses burning down all over.I married her with over 45 guests from around the world and it wasn't wedding bells it was alarm bells not one friend turned up for her I even needed to get her a bridesmaid.we moved 23 times and my friend got her a job as a home carer and she was great at it but the lies she told was incredible.She convinced me to get a joint Facebook account and basically cut me off and stole all my friends I had to get a new account.Hospatilised twice arrested for assault and she made a three page statement even I believed it.I live in Bournemouth England beautiful place the police had to move her after another violent drunken episode I'm surprised she's never been in trouble I've never come across anything like it after she left 11 weeks ago I went no contact and I walk on the beach every morning as she left me depressed full of anxiety and my nerves had gone I'm slowly coming out of it and I've shot down a few flying monkeys.Three weeks after she left she phoned a good friend and said she's with new supply expecting me to run to her like I done before it's the lies omg I feel it and I feel like exposing her as my ,80 year old Dad told me to take videos which I have done and I can see the animal for what it is the devil in disguise every part of me wants to expose them but I don't I continue getting fitter and faster I'm off to Bali for three weeks next month and I intend to spread the word about these rats parasites the thing that annoys me the most Is sometimes I see her work colleagues and they look at me like I've blowtorched there gran the stories they must have made up are unbelievable to me.Your videos have helped me so much and I'm a pretty tough guy but I was just duped my friends and family know and lots of friends are just waiting on Facebook for her to make a wrong move and she will be told what a vile creature she is I'm still in pain and I get better each day tougher and more resilient I had no idea these people existed it's just been 7 years of drama.I call her triple D drink dick and drama a filthy individual once again thank you and I will continue to heal and work towards a bright beautiful future
I am having a very hard time accepting he didnt really love me. I start to feel strong and feel like i can get over this. Then it hits me how he made me feel. I have never loved anyone how much i love him. I need to accept it was all fake on his end but i cant. Ive been coming up with a million reasons why what he put me thru over n over again was worth feeling the love he showed me. Im even convinced i liked the abuse. I now realize my dad and grandpa were narcissists. My Mom and Grandma have stayed w them..so this type of relationship is what is normal to me. Also im a new supply..well was.we were together almost a year. Are there any videos on being the new supply? Now that im pretty sure he discarded me for good and is going to go back to his wife of 17 years. Was already feeling worthless n insecure n now feeling inadequate. Ugh.
You are not alone Andrea, it was hard for me too, to accept that he was an actor. Think of the ugliest face you can imagine, now that is what is underneath his mask. His heart is dark and full of cockroaches. And he doesn’t mind it. He is a portal for evil. And again doesn’t care. Run because soon you will end up just like him if you decide to stay & share a life with him. Take Care 🙏
I’m Braking The Spell. !!!!! Oh My God !! Andrew You May Believe What I Went Through But Not Others ! I’m OUT OF HERE BUT THE COURT. Need THIER Help ! Thanks Friend Andrew ! 🌹
Andrew everything that you have said is like exactly what I'm going threw almost like your with me going threw this???... I'm just dam how this girl friend of mine does it??? Or am I just going nuts!??? I NEED more proof to catcher her with that new supply cuz everyday I FEEL as if I'm not the only one in her life!?🤔😠
I am in control! Thank you Andrew❤ i broke the spell-- lmao the 3rd party is now his 1st party😂 because I left and ghosted/blocked him. I did what I needed to in my timeline which took months admittedly. Now my focus is on me, self love and a new career. I have found my Divine Feminine-- who will eventually find her true DM.❤🎉 thank to you and others who bring this demonic behavior to light. I am a warrior.
Ever seen those black eyes. Ever seen the narcissist circling around (with black eyes)? when you were in public. Those black eyes are absorbing every single thing you do to use it against you.
Reminds me of 3 years back, when I left cult religion, I was looking on RUclips and trying to heal from it, took me almost 2 years to get totally out of that cult. Now my recent break up with the Narc, I am back on RUclips and healing process again. Cult+Narc = miserable 😩
I did move on about 6 months ago Monitored his phone. Painful at what he said about me. I stayed the coarse & confronted him 1-1-23. Packed him up everyday. Emotional abuse is not even fitting words for these people. With grace I wished him all the best. My life is evolving everyday, not always with ease but with knowledge of where I’ve been in this marriage of 24 yrs.. I grieve a live…… we will never have….. we never did. There is nothing that these people bring to a life. Breaking free is the only thing to do.
I spent 15 years with a Narcissist....and yes I was under a spell. There is an aura or something that feels supernatural or a negative spiritual energy that surrounds the Narcissist. I'm slowly coming out of a living hell. The worst part of it all is the damage it caused to my children. I have experienced emotional and spiritual pain that I never knew was possible. Andrew I can't thank you enough for your healing videos.
Yes some narcissists are very wicked and shameless. This type of narcissists are Like the devil and have some evil powers. Only prayer to God can make them powerless and weak so that it gets unactivated in its psychic psychological powers and evil plannings . At the same time people should focus and make a way to stay away from such evil narcissist very soon.
It makes so much sense when i heard that narcissism brings demonic energy into one’s life; looking at some of the comments and what I’m going through : Unexplainable sickness and hopelessness most of the time. I can’t leave yet. We haven’t figured out how to leave because we’re totally dependent on the narcissist.
The mental image I have is of the character of Renfield in the story of Dracula. He worshiped Dracula and craved even the smallest of breadcrumbs of attention because he was brainwashed and slowly but surely went crazy. We started as the naive and innocent Johnathon Harker and hopefully will become Abraham Van Helsing. (Apologies for the media / cultural references).
So my narc has his new supply of course heres the kicker we lived in his house he moved out and went to live with her said I had 3 months to find a place funny thing is is I know it'd his way of keeping me around. And when I have down time im not check his stuff I'm watching these videos to help me stay on track. Thank you for sharing.
He is blocked and no contact and I have moved on…I only received one Hoover from him and I showed indifference and he never came back, Good. One month no contact and It gets better each day…thank you
NEVER EVER AGAIN! Do this want this NO. Do I have this YES. Can I make it happen YES! Is all the hard work worth it ABSOLUTELY! Will you have setback yes does that mean you give up NO! Are you alone NO! Hmm I wonder how I learned all this 😊
Thankyou for this video. Its really helpful. My ex narc bf broke up with me 20 days ago and I tried to go no contact but reached him out after two weeks asking him for a chance to get back together, reminded him of all the good things I used to do for him. He rudely replied that he could remain my friend if I wanted to, at that moment I decided I'm not going back again and blocked him. I'm still under his spell and listening to videos like this to help me out. I have strong urge to confront him to let him know that I know his reality but I know that will go in vain.
Your 100 percent right. Now he's acquiring friends to put him on a pedestal. Yes very draining. They live in a fantasy world honesty. Love your videos too by the way.❣
I thought I was just being decent to endure such strange behaviour from them.I became immune to emotional pain and thought it's just my upbringing to always accept another person as they are. What nonsense.
That's exactly what my priest said after the first time my narc ex cheated and lied and abused me daily, but I couldn't detach from him: "This guy has you under his spell"... Two years later and daily abuse and rages and lies and cheating with at least two women... Definitely some kind of a spell!!
Too many times to number, and I must learn to recognize the pain of those discards. Going back gave them more chance to fool me, setting me up for further denial. Thanks for the wonderful help you give for healing from this situation. You are right about no contact, we can focus on the here and now. Separate from the constant manipulations I find ways to help myself heal. Blessings to all. 🧡
Aloha Andrew, best video of the year!!! 🎯 🎉 I was blinded for 6 yrs now I can see 😳. Now I can see CLEARLY now. The relationship is DONE, DISMANTLED, I just didn’t press the button yet. I can’t wait to be happy again. Thanks Andrew like you told me “ PATIENTS N PLAN” 🤙🏼🤙🏼🤙🏼
I so wish I had this info when I first met him. From about the 7:40-minute mark on, oh I wish I had that information back in the early moments of meeting him. Truer words were never spoken: YOU ARE NOT HIS ONLY SOURCE OF SUPPLY. Tough to hear, yes, but nothing but truth. I hope if someone's listening who has just begun with a narcissist that they will listen to this as truth. Then again, it takes years sometimes, to put it all together. Great information here, thank you.
One month before the discard, when the devalue had begun but I didn't know that's what was happening yet, I was standing in line for coffee and my mind was wandering, probably thinking about how weird and confusing everything had suddenly gotten with him, and the thought popped into my head "was I ever actually in love with him or am I just under his spell?"
Thank you for this video, yes what you say is so true, the only way is to break off contact, the replay scenes is so clear to me, I am that little hamster all the time running in circle, thank you for being here, you have helped me tremendously to see just how bad he had made me slump and almost loose myself in his world he lives in, I find it difficult to interact with others beside my own family for me I can feel how badly he broke me, just like a toy, but he continues to play with broken toy hopefully he will get tired of the broken toy and throw it away, I would feel so much better if he does, thank you so much for your dedication on education of narcist, it has helped me so much thank you
Thank You Andrew! It has been month so in my healing path. Yes, I still think, worry about the narc. I have to remind myself: The narc thinks: He is better, smarter then every body, he doesn’t hear nor care what any one has to say (his reasoning only made sense to him. All about him) What is wrong with me to let him rent space in my head? Yes! I was effected by a parasite. He took my time, my spirit, my mental health and I was the willing participant. Yes, it was great/ I couldn’t do no wrong at the beginning, then the flaws finding and he was relentless. I’m still healing but my boundaries are stronger. No Hoover for me. Been there, done it. Not looking back, I’ll turn into a pillar of salt. Hang tough my Sisters and Brothers. Namaste 🙏
With my HS sweetheart since 1983, 1 child in 1990, split in 2000 for 9mnths. We always had issues , both have childhood traumas, I was in therapy when we split, he went 1 time, I am now in therapy again and CODA. In 2006 he lost his Mom, we inherited her home, By this time he had back issues and did not work In 2008 he was diagnosed with epilepsy. Our daughter moved to Maui in 2016. We started planning a vaca there went in 2018, planned to move there together in 2020, started research and planning. From 2007-2019 all was ok (same roller coaster I was used to ), In June 2019 he had a seizure that changed him, ( he went back on Cepra after 4 yrs seizure free on CBD) that summer we had a great time fireside in our yard. By fall he got more agitated and mean and disrespectful, hurtful. I stayed and ask him to seek help and try to show him I cared. Covid hit, April 2020 I went to my sister's for Easter , he stayed home. When I returned with a plate of food for him, he proceeded to rage and yell about all kinds of BS for 45min. For the next month this went on,l have recordings because he was convincing our daughter I was crazy, telling his friends I was trying to kill him. Kept telling me to get the F out (even though he had no income, had mot worked since his mom passed , 15yrs). I was out of work for 3weeks in shutdown, we got along ok. When I went back to work it got worse. He did not speak to me from June to Aug, I would sit in the yard fireside alone. He needed dental work, so I paid (with savings from covid & HI) .He changed more, paranoid, accusing me of foolish things, bringing up my 1 big past mistake. I def think the med needed adjusting but he would not listen, he was fine. I Planned on moving alone now, secured a job and continued to plan. I got covid in Dec and my Dad passed in Jan so plans changed. He talked bad about me to cousins at my Dads memorial (a man he loved since he was 14). I continued to plan and try to talk to him and save our marriage. When I said to separate, he said no loose ends and said the divorce word. He had no $$ and I was losing myself more and more. I filed in July 2021. I moved to Maui in Sept 2021 and have been here 4 months. Our anniversaries are in a few weeks, 2/18 = 27 yrs married. 2/20= 39 yrs together. Our court date is in March. He has not spoken to me since 3 days before I flew out. I still love and miss him, I definitely ruminate and have deep trauma bonds after 40 yrs. Working on me, daily battle, am homesick for family, friends and my pets still at out family home with him. Am luck to live in paradise to heal but lots of transition and change, still trying to make friends and thrive. Thank you for your info and guidance. Be well
Your story broke my heart, Ive been through a similar experience 20 years ago. My recommendation would be to continue learning about YOU. I have a few book recommendations if you're interested. Much love!!!!
Update he was a no show for court Friday, Now I have an additional bill for 1700.00, when he wanted this, I just wanted to leave. I have decided to dismiss and let him do what he wants. Spent over 4k now and got nowhere. Crazy
Twenty years of being lovebombed , gaslit , devalued and then hoovered again , to the point where I lost nearly all my identify , self worth and confidence ! A devastating pandemic and one more toxic jab too many and I called it quits ! One year of no contact later , still healing and finding my feet , but every day it gets a little bit easier ! Great video 👍 , the more people learn about these creatures the better they can be armed to recognise the red flags before they get sucked in ! Keep up the good work 😎😎
Welcome and thank you The Big H.. it’s great to have you here in the community. Glad you are away from the narcissist and improving yourself. I appreciate you sharing ☀️🙏🙌
Same 32 years and two grown up children for me.
It's been 5 years for me and I lost myself.. you ladies are so strong you give me hope. Thank you for sharing!
@@MrChristinahunt88 I'm a man.....
Wow 20 years smh. I hope you're still doing OK
When you decide to go no contact with these people, you also have to leave them emotionally. No more emotions about them. No matter what happens. Leave them emotionally. Stop wasting emotions on the people who already wasted so much of your life.
🙏💯🙌💪
Best way to break the Spell is to not talk about them. It ends their lust for attention good or bad. Choose Peace of mind by evicting them from our head space to Heal!
💪😉💯
Exactly!!!
Everytime i have a weak moment i watch one of your videos and i get myself back on track to healing!
Beautiful Stephanie 🙏💯🙌
Well done, these videos are so helpful it’s great advice.
Videos like these are valuable to our healing process and contribute to our well-being mentally, spiritually, emotionally, physically. Truly grateful for these words of advice.
Me too Stephanie! Andrew you a sanity and soul saver!
Me too...these videos are the best
"The only person that can break the spell is you"!
💯☀️💯💪
So very true, I love this video.
Not going back this time. I went back 3 times, and it escalated faster and faster to the discard. This time I'm taking real action by blocking him on everything, not going to places I know he goes. It's not easy, but time will heal. Thank you Andrew. ♥️
Welcome Cara..🙏💯🙌
Bravo, you hot wise!
DITTO!
Went back 3-4× ... had no idea what a FAKETARD he was. I wish him the BEST with his other supplies & flying monkeys 🐒 .... I GOT GOD & it's so empowering to know I am able to LOVE ❤️
You were so on breaking me like you did your other women b4 me.....
We have to remember that in the spiritual realm, these people are just vessels with entities working in them to devour, destroy and yes, kill. Go back and you’ll start to notice yourself become more frail, sicker and desperate. Then the trauma bond gets thicker and you’re caught in their web. It’s not worth it, and you’ll essentially lose your identity and God knows what else. Stay AWAY and learn to love yourself. Once you heal and ask for God’s protection, you’ll never have to experience this again. Love y’all! ❤️
Yep, empty vessels make the most noise.
They are energy vampires.
GOD bless you very true they are devil's very much into distressing us hurting us and everything that is evil guide your heart and mind heal and pray to God he brought us here to Andrew to get healing through Andrew's teaching we will all heal together ❤️
@@gabrielleaumont3971 Omg yes I actually read about this 😭 sucking the blood from our vains,my friend said to me when you kill a vampire you must stab it in the heart to kill it so this is our job to make the break final...
Couldn't have written this statement better myself 🎯
It is a spell and it makes you 😷 sick.
💯🎯more ways than one.. mentally, psychologically, emotionally, spiritually, physically, and financially 🎯💯
Anxiety depression physical problems lack of energy apathy ...
Poison
@@valb9963 🎯
lol so true
The thing is..,these narcissistic people do black spells on the daily. It took about 2 years for this spell to wear off. I’m still healing. Once you healed…don’t go back. This person made my life a living hell at one point. Exactly right.❤️
Don't give him so much of you. Still healing? Why? why give him that? Heal today, right now, and love your life and yourself.
They have no control if you take it from them ❤❤❤❤❤
You would be so proud of me Andrew. The day I went no contact…I stayed no contact. It gives me a sense of power, closure, strength and focus. I cry…I ruminate, I get dreams…but I never break no contact. 🙏🏻We will talk soon🙏🏻
I am proud of you 🙏💯🙌
It's literally a spell... I feel drained at times.. My energy... I got so sick in 2013...almost died from trying to please and fix.
I understand completely 🙌💯🙏
WoW , my heart's breaking from these comments 😢
Me too, I had breast cancer and needed both hips replaced aged 58 and 61 due to arthritis
It absolutely is a spell. I was always sick, like I had the flu. I'm healthy and feel good about life again.
😪
I am in the mourning stages of the end. I am not mourning the lack of that malignant narcissist, I am mourning what I thought could be. What I thought could be was fueled by the love bombing. I had no idea, whatsoever, what he was doing. He did. I happily filled in all of the blanks, he added the fuel, and I believed it. After I started listening to you, and learning about the dangers of narcissists, I felt like I had been poisoned by him. This is a long recovery, but what I learned was invaluable. I emerged stronger than ever. Thank you again, Andrew for the unvarnished truth. God bless you for all you do for all of us.
Same here
Eileen how are you now? I am still with him. 25.5 years almost divorced
@@wendythomas4930 Hi Wendy, completely recovered. Lord, what a journey. Grateful for the lessons learned and the changes that resulted from that mercifully brief dance with the devil. Stay the course-its well worth it!
ANDREW!!! I left two weeks ago and went no contact last week. I watch your videos every day and you are an angel!!! I am sticking strong, getting my friends back, and loving life already. When I have doubts I watch your videos and then go “Yeah!!! I am strong powerful human and he has no hold on me anymore nor will he ever again!” So thanks. :)
Beautiful empowering message of growth and healing 🙏💯🙌😊
Reece! this is also what im going through! i had temporary moments of insanity, i was angry and cursed him blocked and unblocked several times, but now i am actually OVER HIM and happy that i broke the spell. He was never going to change and after 4years of physical, emotional abuse, i am slowly regaining my power, getting back my friends and the person i was before i met the Narc,
Yip you right - i am still under the spell🙄😔💥
It’s a spell and a curse! Three months free of her and I am still in pain over the whole thing. My head still spinning and heart hurting. EVEN THOUGH I know I am better off - free of the abuse. Even though there is no way I would ever go back to that relationship. Some days are better than others. Today isn’t one of them.
💯🙏🙌
You are still hanging on, which is giving her more of your energy. She is happy, you're not impeding her welfare in any way.
Same here man. It's a fight
Hi Andrew. Yes, I was under his spell, but thank God, I'm out of it, and FREE. It took a long time and WORK to get out of it, and once you're out, NEVER GO BACK TO A NARCISSIST! IT GETS WORSE! I went into Therapy, read self help books and I blocked my phone #, got off Facebook, and I moved. Never heard from him again in 11.3 years. It works! You WILL get over him. TIME breaks the spell. ONLY YOU can make this happen.
In your time..🙏💯🙌
What's theirs is theirs & what's yours is theirs
😉😉💯
Omg!! I have heard that before from my former narc friend!!
OMG YES! Completely their dreams and their supply. After 34+yrs of giving, I cut the ties. Went back for x 6mo AND left again. It’s been VERY hard and completely confusing and horrible time. Recovery has taken a long, long time but so glad I had the strength do do it for myself. Hang in there for anyone reading this!! YOU will make it!! Hold tight to yourself, find support. You can do it. Andrew is so right. 💝💝
🙏💯🙌☀️💪
And on a spiritual and energetic note…these people are not CABLE of loving. NEVER. You give them a chance…they Will hurt you…AGAIN!!!
Agree with you.. 💯🙌🙏
Like reptilians, they act on instinct, not love. You can try to love a reptilian, but turn your back and they will bite you.
So much hurt
I got sucked back in because I left the door open a little bit. Very soon the cycle started again. Rinse wash repeat … I stopped it in its tracks because it was unbelievable and got much worse. I left under the worst circumstances believe me. You can do it. BLOCK THEM.
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I really like how emphatic you are here Andrew, you show how much you care for the people who you're sharing your healing journey with. You're very wise and strong to have chosen a path and stuck to it and you are proof that it pays to do this as oppose to exploring the dangerous path of returning
I appreciate your kindness and sharing this beautiful message 🙌🙏☀️💯
Once you know you go you get out and you stay out. This is so true 👍 no contact is the only way, their nothing but predators that's all they are, listen to this dude, I've been there done that 🙏 to Jesus to fight all your battle's and he will, you just have to step up and go no contact and block them on everything and it will break the trauma bond slowly, but you must stay no contact and stop the emotional thinking about them their nothing but a demon 👿.
Thank you Gay.. No Contact is the empowerment step..🙌☀️
I have been no contact fid 18 months. I keep thinking/ feeling he will try and hoover me back. He lives a 15 mins drive away. I keep educating myself praying for the strength to silently ignore him turn my back and protect my energy. I feel I am getting obsessed with the need to protect myself because evil is strong. I will be victorious x
@@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlone
I needed help to understand after i was blocked ... i would have done anything at that time to understand..i was very cofused ok..He said he would help but he was worse!
It's more like going cold turkey, trauma bonding is a highly addictive, the push/pull creates a cocktail mix of hormones similar to a cocaine high. You can't simply wave a wand to break that spell, you have to go thru physical withdraws of having just one more fix for months of no contact before you can begin to break the spell.
Thank you for sharing this.. ☀️🙌🙏
The withdrawal is excruciatingly painful 😔
Excellent Andrew! I went back too many times over a 5 year period. It was all a waste of time. No more! Yes it was like a spell and as you explain they draw us in. No more! Thanks!
God bless you ☀️🙌🙏.. moving forward everyday 🙏
This business of going back “on average” x amount of times…. Omg I foolishly went back SO MANY TIMES. It was like clockwork. Every 3-4 weeks that cycle was repeated…. most definitely given permission by ME. Their many types of supply is evident. AA provides a narc a crazy supply of OTHER NARCS! I am done. 2016 is when this all started. DONE.
Trauma bonds are real! It's like an addiction to a powerful drug. The detoxing from it is extremely difficult BUT WORTH IT!!
the narcissist I have been free off for a week now would RAGE for hours if I had an opinion that differed from his, he would try to talk circles around me, attempt to baffle me with long words and basically try to wear me down and mentally drain me until I gave in...but not the last time :) a week ago a stood my ground, I stuck to my guns and I refused the argument I said it was over- he sent a long winded venom laced reply and I simply deleted it and blocked him.
i was so bored of having my words invalidated and stepped on. i finally thought- 'I have a brain in my head, it's not just in there to keep the wind from whistling between my ears'- so I shut him down and this past week has been BLISS!
my phone is quiet, my anxiety has all but vanished, my sleep pattern has returned to normal and I no longer feel like I have to apologise just to break tension- that guy is a 46 year old throwing tantrums that a bratty toddler would be embarrassed by, life is too short to be plagued by emotion sucking vampires
Thank you for sharing this 💯🙌☀️
THIS is the tough love that I need today, tomorrow and yesterday. Thank you for reminding me of my value as an Empath and the fact that it was JUST a spell that an evil person placed on me and breaking it is COMPLETELY within my control. I have the power to change this by holding fast to my commitment of NO CONTACT. Keep up the good work. Your beautiful spirit and enduring kindness are changing lives in numbers that are likely far more than you will ever know. 💕
Thank you for sharing this..🙏💯🙌❤️
absolute truth!!!!!
just few hours without narc i feel total different person...i feel M E!
happy to be me!
he was aware and he🧐 said different person came back to him, so we should never separate😥😬😨again⛓🔐
🙏🙌☀️💯
I am in a burnout due to the narcist. My energy is gone. He was like a vampire emotionally and fysically.
Sending healing energy and strength 💯🙏🙌
I have had 3 Narcs in my life,,,,,,it took decades for some of them
I need to get empowered Andrew. I know I need to end the cycle and take the action. Your videos which I recently discovered have helped. I started to think I was mistaken and over thinking. Deep down I know the truth. I will break the spell. Thank you 😊
Welcome 🙏 always 🙏
It has taken me 17 years to heal, I speak my truth. I went for all the love bombing and discards for 10 years, until I FINALLY figured out who I was with.
I was with the devil himself
Yep.....all so true, Andrew. They literally strip you of everything....it is all about them. Their behaviour controls you in so many ways...the fear they want to install in you is appalling. I felt I was under a spell and still am in someway even after leaving. Day by day I'm working on healing....day by day I'm clearing their spell.
💯💯🙏
Was a brief but highly intense "relationship". I knew exactly what he was from the start, but really was under a "spell". Was thrilled by him, on every level. Knew what I was doing. Did it anyway. Was dream-like while it was happening. Almost all love-bombing. No maliciousness in him at all, and I was watching closely for it to surface. After awhile, began to notice subtle changes in his attention level. Saw blatant evidence of manipulation attempts, which I resisted. Breaking point came. I needed a minor medical procedure. He never even texted to see how I was. I brought it up. Was met with a barrage of excuses, but no sincere care. That was the beginning of the end. I made a decision to end it. Left abruptly, no real explanation. But carried affection for him for many months, despite the jarring glimpse I had into who he really was. Been a year and there remains a great divide within me, between what I KNOW intellectually (after copious research and learning)...and how I FEEL. Can't seem to extinguish the affection. That memory of the initial bliss phase is so intoxicating, even now. He's no good. That's clear. Would never go back. But a form of a spell remains. Leaves me feeling stuck.
Thank you for sharing this 🙏💯🙌
Was in the same condition...love him to bits..... did not love him ...but the idea of him what i though and what he represented..... sometimes i feel like my soul is dying for him...i wish he was real..but he is not...i completely understand your pain....do not supress your pain....feel it..let it come.....in the weak moments remind yourself of his reality...and watch such videos....cognitive dissonace is what we are trying to break...... because that person we loved his body is present...we are trying to find him in their body.... but they are not real.....just an illusion mixed with lies and manipulation..... would love to hear what helps you heal...... god has hold our hand to take us out of the grip of that demon.... always think about what life would have been with him if you did not left...we all are togeather in this ...you are not alone.
I just wrote you a detailed, lengthy reply and it didn't go through. :(. In brief, thanks for your supportive comment. Much time has gone by and I feel much better. You asked what helped me to heal? It was time and distance. Definitely the complete absence of contact with him. I grieved what I thought I had. I saw clearly what I actually had (nothing). I accepted that I ignored my own intuitive prompts and jumped headlong into "excitement" (which masquerades as such, but is actually very close to anxiety). I traded my own priorities for his beauty and his romantic rhetoric (both meaningless without substantial depth). Actions speak volumes. Not pretty illusions. I am very clear now on what that whole thing was. I'm even grateful that it happened, because it brought me to a new awareness. Now when I meet people, I see the whole context of what is there. I silently measure their words, motivations, behavior. And I am most clear about my own intrinsic value. Would not compromise that again, ever, especially not for a whimsical thrill. Fantasy has it's place in paperback novels. Reality is where we all live though. Thanks again, and good luck to you.
@@rainflower5874 hey you, thank you for the reply it helped me a lot.... i want to share somethings which i though might help you..... after this abuse we become observer like a third person of not only others but most importantly ourself ..it is almost like we are detached from our body and see our self for who we we are what we want..what are the wrong habits and traits we have and what are our strengths. .. preety superpower to have don't you think ;) ....another thing whenever get confuse between two things between logic and feeling.... always see for how you body feels about certain decision...people and we ourself can deceive and manipulate our logic and feelings to get what we want not what we need...but how our body feels can never be wrong... it keeps score subconsciously of every right or wrong since birth.... while taking a big decision how we feel guilty or not ...anxious or not ...calm and peaceful thinking about it or not... discomfort is ok... it is required for growth .... third one is know your personality type..i am an infj...it helps you understand or decode your self better.... frank james videos are good.... fourthly when you an counters people with npd...just remember...if they can stand with their lies so strongly its our duty to stand even with more strenght with the truth..... certain people are protector of truth...that's how earth still have humanity... donot only live but thrive in your life... do more than what you thought you will before that person came in life because now we are emotionally and intellectually stronger than ever.... god prepares those with specials gifts and chosen ones to go through hell to understand the beauty of heaven on earth.... and serve a special purpose on earth.... i know my friend after narcissistic abuse sometimes it feels like...you have died once and you rember the painfull death of your past life and you are rebirthed again with all that past meomory... to live with... excuss my english mistakes not my native language... but hope got what i trying to convey... you are already a highly empathetic and intellctual person i can tell... but thought somethings out of this might help you.... after all we all are children of one and here to help each other.....may god give you all the happiness and heal your soul forver.
I’m not being lured in or getting involved with the narc again. Looking at them online doesn’t bother me bcoz the narc was only online. My healing has been going quite well as I realized a year ago what a narc is and I have busy life and family. Narc coaches Jesse & Dave have helped me learn and understand. 🥰
Getting ready to leave, after 5 years. Im so damaged🤦🏾♂️. Y'all be careful out here🤞🏾
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Thank you for your video Andrew. Oh yes I broke that spell. I will always remember Easter gone. I was in lighting a candle and I prayed to the Sacred Heart. I asked the Lord to please direct me in my life. I didn't realize at the time I was being devalued but I knew something was off. Days later my gut instinct knew this evil soulless creature was indeed lying to me. He was cheating on me with probably a number of supplies. I have begun a new life Andrew. The old me is gone. I educate myself now all of the time. Peace has begun to enter my life. Lisa
Beautiful reply… this is so empowering 🙌☀️🙏
I had a similar experience. God bless you . Even when confronted he denied and blame shifted then slandered me then "punished" me for not allowing him to gaslight me. He wanted me to take back that i said he had cheated. Yet it was the truth. He is a pathological liar. I pray for his soul and thank God for breaking the soul tie.
@@quit512 They are dirty filthy cheaters and pathological liars, they even believe their own lies 🤣💚
you are very brave and very strong, always were (perhaps didn't know it). You are a survivor. Bless you, stay strong count your blessings, live a beautiful life.
@@gabrielleaumont3971 Thank you so much Gabrielle xx
He mad me angry at myself for nothing I did but trying to understand his sickness,freedom is great everyday my life is mine unless I choose to share it again!!😎
Thank you. Before I knew about narcissism I was already under the spell, I had even said to her that she had put a spell on me. I didn’t realise what was going on. The times when we weren’t together she was the first thing on my mind when I woke, the last thing before I slept and in my mind throughout the day. I was counting the time till we would see each other or speak and for me it was too long. I took my phone with me everywhere just in case I missed a message or call - although they rarely came. After nearly four months it is still so hard and she thinks that she can whistle and I will come running, I don’t know if this would be the case or not. The only thing that is helping at the moment is the fact that she is out of the country at the moment. I hope she doesn’t come back for some time. I know she will I just hope that I am strong enough to say no.
I can totally relate to your story. I was the same, my phone was attached to me in case he rang or needed me. I went no contact 18 months ago but that is not the end. They still have the power to return, when they want , to manipulate and lie to get our energy again. It's hard to turn your back to them , ignore them and not let them trigger a reaction.
We have to realise we hold all the good power in this battle and it will always win over evil. Be that different person who now thinks of self love only ❤ I will overpower him if he returns . X
yes, you are strong. go no contact you know the drill.
Every time he leaves the house I pray that he don't return I regret meeting him
You one of the best speakers on this subject. God bless you!
Thank you 🙏.. I appreciate your kindness and honesty 🙌💯❤️🙏
The one I had never ask me for money he always give me!!
I totally understand this!
I lost my lovely husband of 23 years marriage, 6 years ago and remember feeling at the time that I didn’t care about anything, other than my (adult) children, including myself for at least 18 months, until my ex appeared, he must have thought his birthdays had come all at once, and slowly over the next couple of years he manipulated and lied to me, I then let him move into my lovely home, where I saw the real him dipping in and out, which was the biggest shock , I’d been living in a protective bubble !! I realised he wasn’t the person I thought he was and literally one day threw him out , i questioned some of his actions and he ran , literally ran off !!!! I do feel that he did think I’d calm down and he would yet again hoover me up, saying I was overthinking things, too sensitive, he couldn’t. Yes,I loved him with all my heart , something I said I wouldn’t ever do again after losing my husband as couldn’t cope, but I did I let him into my heart and he abused my love, kindness and heart. I could use the phrase he was a user and do to friends /family who don’t understand the complexity of narcissism but he is so much worse than that !! My feelings are still very raw, and i do remember the feeling of the knight in shining armour saving me , but he wasn’t, he was feeding off my pain and sorrow 🥲 I’m so strong now, yes I cry, but I enjoy every minute of every day, and realise now that everyone comes with a warning .
My message in writing this is that everything can change in a breath so , Enjoy , keeping smiling , you can get through it, time is a healer, be kind to yourself, love to you all 🥰
Thank you for sharing this message Jo..🙌🙏💯🙏
You said something very important the narcissist fed off your pain and sorrow. These demons sense your need and they reflect it back onto you. They'll morph into anything to get what they want.
Thank you. Same to you !
End It Moment Caught Him in More Lies Also Cheating - Lie and Cheat No Trust
They hide so much from people.. it’s not until the truth is discovered that we become enlightened thank you Jane 🙌🙏
I have wondered when this transition occurred. For me it was wanting something I had. So one transgression after another ignored or thought of as temporary. She was grieving a loss, but so was I. The thing is a narc grieves differently. Agression, rage, an entitlement to be the exception that death defeated, genuine compassion seen as pandering. Everyone's empathy for that loss fades as all are treated like shit. But you as a primary are invested deep. Your company wanted only for supply and for them to avoid sitting with themselves when all others have burned out. You mistake wanting your attention for affection. But in clear, clear hindsight, there wasn't anything in common. Just a happenstance meeting. Most things repulsed me and my beliefs. But yes Andrew, it can be called a spell. A mirage. A ruse. You have to be fed up way past tolerances that those not invested in the 'spell' would have already been long gone.
Thank you for this Brad 🙏🙏☀️💯💯
Develop a plan to protect yourself from regressing! Then work the plan faithfully!!
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Yes you HAVE TO cut the emotional bonds, cut off your vibrational energy completely. It takes effort, a mind effort, and so necessary
I needed to hear this right at this moment. Thankyou for everything beautiful Andrew 🙏 you are helping me to get stronger every day 🌺🌸 love and light to all survivors. We will get there 🙏
Welcome Tammy 🙏💯🙏
Great absolutes at the end
He didnt love me. He wont change. He will take much. Yes Thanks for the great advice my Dad gave me that it wont get better. Right why would I put myself in that position again.
Welcome 🙏 thank you for sharing this 🙌☀️
If he/she is indifferent it means he/she has another supply. Line-up your ducks and then go no contact. If they've become indifferent that means they fell in destiny's trap. If you try to outsmart destiny or feel you're more empathic, destiny will burn you and the narcissist.
Andrew , I let the narcissist go 10 years ago and it took that amount of time to break the spell. I had to review your channel everyday to free myself and I thank you for that. It's a lot of work and I did it and continue to move forward. I was down, lost and worked my way through the healing process. It wasn't easy. As you said, I had to go through it and it was worth it. Action is key. He died 2019.
HE WOULD SAY IF YOU LOVE ME YOU WILL DO THIS FOR MEEE!!!🍊🍊🍊💛
Thank you Andrew for so accurately describing the zombie like spell the narc puts us in with the mind games they play on us, which increasingly get worse and hook us deeper. Your description is so accurate that it reminds me I never want to go there again. The push pull creates a trauma bond that we become addicted to from 3 internal chemicals emitted in our bodies which cause us to become addicted to them, that is the spell. I want off the zombie gerbal wheel and never go back. Your videos are so helpful. Thank you!
Welcome 🙏🙌😌
Oh yes That’s exactly how I saw it but Thank God he broke that curse , that spell was broken . Yes They are parasites from hell . Oh but I am so free now with exception of their long lasting sting. Like they want that sting to last you a life time
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I totally agree, Andrew. Entirely!
And when you get the 'soft discard', I call it 'the wedge' technique (the Narcissist wants to avoid giving CLOSURE and they try to keep the door 'wedged open' for their return), then it becomes your job to give the Narcissist strong closure. I did this, then walked away.
YOU have to give the Narcissist strong CLOSURE then walk away, and I mean RELOCATE and BLOCK indefinitely!!!!!!!!!!!! There's no 'half-way-house' with this! There just isn't is the 'plain truth'.
I'm starting not to care now. Its finally wonderful!!!!!!!!!! I'm more logically minded and have trained my mind to interrupt unhelpful emotional thinking with logical thinking based upon radical acceptance and disgust. You have to treat this as WAR defending yourself.
WoW, News Flash . Well said, Real Said, and REAL FACTS. Thanks for Saying it Like it is. I learn better and do better when things aren't sugar coated. It sparks something in me to Ignite Change, more change and sticking with my new desecions. I really want to see at the End of this journey, well I want to meet at the End of my new path, that version of me that got lost, the person I should have Experienced ALL these YEARS, can't wait to meet Her.
Welcome 🙏💯🙌☀️
God bless you trying to help people with their own lives. Good 🇬🇧🙏
Hi Andrew! Thank God for your videos and taking the time to make them. . I’ve been missing my ex even though I know going back is not an option. Your videos help me toughen up and ground myself again. God bless you🙏🏻
Continue on the path.. you are doing great..🙏🙌💯💪💯
Thank you for help me understand who I was dealing for he left one week ago I'm accepting the was over but still hurting I know I'm gonna be ok just gonna take time but I'm willing to feel better
Incredible. Very true. Thanks for your video.
Wow, when i read my reply from almost a year ago, what a difference i feel. I feel more "charged up," more alive. I ALWAYS believed in TIME. My Therapist always told me how important TIME is, and she was right. Today, i feel like a new person, and NOBODY can actually hurt me like that anymore. I run from narcissists, and refuse to be involved with Toxic people who are so self-centered that they hold on to every single word you say, and make something BAD out of it. These people are hurting and struggling everyday, but it's not their fault. I choose to follow my dreams and protect my heart. NO TOXIC PEOPLE ALLOWED!🚫
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You've helped me so much last 7 days.Im s 57 year old man a good soul I met her on a dating site her house was like her rotten she didn't even have a washing machine and innlots of debt I fell for her because I felt sorry for her little game I thought she was depressed there was red flags sirens blaring houses burning down all over.I married her with over 45 guests from around the world and it wasn't wedding bells it was alarm bells not one friend turned up for her I even needed to get her a bridesmaid.we moved 23 times and my friend got her a job as a home carer and she was great at it but the lies she told was incredible.She convinced me to get a joint Facebook account and basically cut me off and stole all my friends I had to get a new account.Hospatilised twice arrested for assault and she made a three page statement even I believed it.I live in Bournemouth England beautiful place the police had to move her after another violent drunken episode I'm surprised she's never been in trouble I've never come across anything like it after she left 11 weeks ago I went no contact and I walk on the beach every morning as she left me depressed full of anxiety and my nerves had gone I'm slowly coming out of it and I've shot down a few flying monkeys.Three weeks after she left she phoned a good friend and said she's with new supply expecting me to run to her like I done before it's the lies omg I feel it and I feel like exposing her as my ,80 year old Dad told me to take videos which I have done and I can see the animal for what it is the devil in disguise every part of me wants to expose them but I don't I continue getting fitter and faster I'm off to Bali for three weeks next month and I intend to spread the word about these rats parasites the thing that annoys me the most Is sometimes I see her work colleagues and they look at me like I've blowtorched there gran the stories they must have made up are unbelievable to me.Your videos have helped me so much and I'm a pretty tough guy but I was just duped my friends and family know and lots of friends are just waiting on Facebook for her to make a wrong move and she will be told what a vile creature she is I'm still in pain and I get better each day tougher and more resilient I had no idea these people existed it's just been 7 years of drama.I call her triple D drink dick and drama a filthy individual once again thank you and I will continue to heal and work towards a bright beautiful future
I am having a very hard time accepting he didnt really love me. I start to feel strong and feel like i can get over this. Then it hits me how he made me feel. I have never loved anyone how much i love him. I need to accept it was all fake on his end but i cant. Ive been coming up with a million reasons why what he put me thru over n over again was worth feeling the love he showed me. Im even convinced i liked the abuse. I now realize my dad and grandpa were narcissists. My Mom and Grandma have stayed w them..so this type of relationship is what is normal to me. Also im a new supply..well was.we were together almost a year. Are there any videos on being the new supply? Now that im pretty sure he discarded me for good and is going to go back to his wife of 17 years. Was already feeling worthless n insecure n now feeling inadequate. Ugh.
Thank you for sharing this 🙏💯🙌
You are not alone Andrea, it was hard for me too, to accept that he was an actor. Think of the ugliest face you can imagine, now that is what is underneath his mask. His heart is dark and full of cockroaches. And he doesn’t mind it. He is a portal for evil. And again doesn’t care. Run because soon you will end up just like him if you decide to stay & share a life with him. Take Care 🙏
I’m Braking The Spell. !!!!!
Oh My God !! Andrew You May Believe What I Went Through But Not Others ! I’m OUT OF HERE BUT THE COURT. Need THIER Help !
Thanks Friend Andrew ! 🌹
Welcome 🙏
Andrew everything that you have said is like exactly what I'm going threw almost like your with me going threw this???... I'm just dam how this girl friend of mine does it??? Or am I just going nuts!??? I NEED more proof to catcher her with that new supply cuz everyday I FEEL as if I'm not the only one in her life!?🤔😠
Continue to become educated and empowered 🙏🙌☀️
I am in control! Thank you Andrew❤ i broke the spell-- lmao the 3rd party is now his 1st party😂 because I left and ghosted/blocked him. I did what I needed to in my timeline which took months admittedly.
Now my focus is on me, self love and a new career. I have found my Divine Feminine-- who will eventually find her true DM.❤🎉 thank to you and others who bring this demonic behavior to light. I am a warrior.
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I was the one that always went back he never came back to me
Same. Reverse hovering. I would sit and think of ways that I could make things better, let him right back in. Smh.
Ever seen those black eyes. Ever seen the narcissist circling around (with black eyes)? when you were in public. Those black eyes are absorbing every single thing you do to use it against you.
Reminds me of 3 years back, when I left cult religion, I was looking on RUclips and trying to heal from it, took me almost 2 years to get totally out of that cult. Now my recent break up with the Narc, I am back on RUclips and healing process again. Cult+Narc = miserable 😩
Was it 'Love Has Won' cult?
I did move on about 6 months ago
Monitored his phone. Painful at what he said about me. I stayed the coarse
& confronted him 1-1-23.
Packed him up everyday. Emotional abuse is not even fitting words for these people.
With grace I wished him all the best.
My life is evolving everyday, not always with ease but with knowledge of where I’ve been in this marriage of 24 yrs..
I grieve a live…… we will never have…..
we never did.
There is nothing that these people bring to a life.
Breaking free is the only thing to do.
Thank you for sharing this insight 🙏🙌😌💯
I have no more drama ❤💯
Beautiful to hear 🙌💯🙏
I spent 15 years with a Narcissist....and yes I was under a spell. There is an aura or something that feels supernatural or a negative spiritual energy that surrounds the Narcissist. I'm slowly coming out of a living hell. The worst part of it all is the damage it caused to my children. I have experienced emotional and spiritual pain that I never knew was possible. Andrew I can't thank you enough for your healing videos.
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Yes some narcissists are very wicked and shameless. This type of narcissists are Like the devil and have some evil powers. Only prayer to God can make them powerless and weak so that it gets unactivated in its psychic psychological powers and evil plannings . At the same time people should focus and make a way to stay away from such evil narcissist very soon.
It makes so much sense when i heard that narcissism brings demonic energy into one’s life; looking at some of the comments and what I’m going through : Unexplainable sickness and hopelessness most of the time. I can’t leave yet.
We haven’t figured out how to leave because we’re totally dependent on the narcissist.
Thank you, Andrew. I'll never be with anyone like this , again! No mas! Namaste🙏💯❤🤟🕯🌺
Namaste 🙏
Wow! Spot on 🙏
Thank you 🙏
The mental image I have is of the character of Renfield in the story of Dracula. He worshiped Dracula and craved even the smallest of breadcrumbs of attention because he was brainwashed and slowly but surely went crazy. We started as the naive and innocent Johnathon Harker and hopefully will become Abraham Van Helsing. (Apologies for the media / cultural references).
Thank you for sharing this 💯🙏🙌
So my narc has his new supply of course heres the kicker we lived in his house he moved out and went to live with her said I had 3 months to find a place funny thing is is I know it'd his way of keeping me around. And when I have down time im not check his stuff I'm watching these videos to help me stay on track. Thank you for sharing.
Welcome 🙏
So so true, thank you 👍
Welcome 🙏
He is blocked and no contact and I have moved on…I only received one Hoover from him and I showed indifference and he never came back, Good. One month no contact and It gets better each day…thank you
Thank you so much.🙏
Welcome 🙏
No contact is the key for sure. Going no contact, not seeing him or allowing him access to me via text or phone calls broke the spell.
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Hey Drew 💜💜💜👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
Hi Mary ❤️🙏
NEVER EVER AGAIN! Do this want this NO. Do I have this YES. Can I make it happen YES! Is all the hard work worth it ABSOLUTELY! Will you have setback yes does that mean you give up NO! Are you alone NO! Hmm I wonder how I learned all this 😊
Beautiful 🤩 thank you 🙌💯
Thankyou for this video. Its really helpful. My ex narc bf broke up with me 20 days ago and I tried to go no contact but reached him out after two weeks asking him for a chance to get back together, reminded him of all the good things I used to do for him. He rudely replied that he could remain my friend if I wanted to, at that moment I decided I'm not going back again and blocked him. I'm still under his spell and listening to videos like this to help me out. I have strong urge to confront him to let him know that I know his reality but I know that will go in vain.
Sending healing energy and strength 🙏🙌💯
Thanks for the reminder
Welcome val 🙌🙌
Your 100 percent right. Now he's acquiring friends to put him on a pedestal. Yes very draining. They live in a fantasy world honesty. Love your videos too by the way.❣
Thank you 🙌☀️💯
The light will shine through
Always 🙌☀️
I thought I was just being decent to endure such strange behaviour from them.I became immune to emotional pain and thought it's just my upbringing to always accept another person as they are. What nonsense.
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That's exactly what my priest said after the first time my narc ex cheated and lied and abused me daily, but I couldn't detach from him: "This guy has you under his spell"... Two years later and daily abuse and rages and lies and cheating with at least two women... Definitely some kind of a spell!!
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Too many times to number, and I must learn to recognize the pain of those discards. Going back gave them more chance to fool me, setting me up for further denial. Thanks for the wonderful help you give for healing from this situation. You are right about no contact, we can focus on the here and now. Separate from the constant manipulations I find ways to help myself heal. Blessings to all. 🧡
Welcome 🙏 💪😉
Aloha Andrew, best video of the year!!! 🎯 🎉 I was blinded for 6 yrs now I can see 😳. Now I can see CLEARLY now. The relationship is DONE, DISMANTLED, I just didn’t press the button yet. I can’t wait to be happy again. Thanks Andrew like you told me “ PATIENTS N PLAN” 🤙🏼🤙🏼🤙🏼
🎯🎯💯💯🙌🙌🙏🙏🏄♀️🏄♀️🤙🤙🤙
NARCDAILY -You Are Not Alone ur da best Andrew 🙏🏼🤙🏼💯🌺
Helsyea! Thank u baby Jesus every time I need a cold splash, hard slap of reason Andrew's the go to guy for the facts! thank u Andrew 🙏 perfect 🙏
Welcome 💯🙌😉🙏
I so wish I had this info when I first met him.
From about the 7:40-minute mark on, oh I wish I had that information back in the early moments of meeting him. Truer words were never spoken: YOU ARE NOT HIS ONLY SOURCE OF SUPPLY. Tough to hear, yes, but nothing but truth. I hope if someone's listening who has just begun with a narcissist that they will listen to this as truth. Then again, it takes years sometimes, to put it all together.
Great information here, thank you.
Welcome 🙏 always ☀️
You are not his only source of supply! That is what hurts the most for me.
One month before the discard, when the devalue had begun but I didn't know that's what was happening yet, I was standing in line for coffee and my mind was wandering, probably thinking about how weird and confusing everything had suddenly gotten with him, and the thought popped into my head "was I ever actually in love with him or am I just under his spell?"
Thank you Andrew
Welcome 🙏
Thank you for this video, yes what you say is so true, the only way is to break off contact, the replay scenes is so clear to me, I am that little hamster all the time running in circle, thank you for being here, you have helped me tremendously to see just how bad he had made me slump and almost loose myself in his world he lives in, I find it difficult to interact with others beside my own family for me I can feel how badly he broke me, just like a toy, but he continues to play with broken toy hopefully he will get tired of the broken toy and throw it away, I would feel so much better if he does, thank you so much for your dedication on education of narcist, it has helped me so much thank you
So true will said
That video is exactly what I needed right now 🙏🏼👍🏻💯‼️
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Thank You Andrew! It has been month so in my healing path. Yes, I still think, worry about the narc. I have to remind myself: The narc thinks: He is better, smarter then every body, he doesn’t hear nor care what any one has to say (his reasoning only made sense to him. All about him) What is wrong with me to let him rent space in my head? Yes! I was effected by a parasite. He took my time, my spirit, my mental health and I was the willing participant. Yes, it was great/ I couldn’t do no wrong at the beginning, then the flaws finding and he was relentless. I’m still healing but my boundaries are stronger. No Hoover for me. Been there, done it. Not looking back, I’ll turn into a pillar of salt. Hang tough my Sisters and Brothers. Namaste 🙏
One of the best videos on this subject, ever!!! 👍💯
Thank you 🙏
Thank-you!
Welcome 🙏
With my HS sweetheart since 1983, 1 child in 1990, split in 2000 for 9mnths. We always had issues , both have childhood traumas, I was in therapy when we split, he went 1 time, I am now in therapy again and CODA. In 2006 he lost his Mom, we inherited her home, By this time he had back issues and did not work In 2008 he was diagnosed with epilepsy. Our daughter moved to Maui in 2016. We started planning a vaca there went in 2018, planned to move there together in 2020, started research and planning. From 2007-2019 all was ok (same roller coaster I was used to ), In June 2019 he had a seizure that changed him, ( he went back on Cepra after 4 yrs seizure free on CBD) that summer we had a great time fireside in our yard. By fall he got more agitated and mean and disrespectful, hurtful. I stayed and ask him to seek help and try to show him I cared. Covid hit, April 2020 I went to my sister's for Easter , he stayed home. When I returned with a plate of food for him, he proceeded to rage and yell about all kinds of BS for 45min. For the next month this went on,l have recordings because he was convincing our daughter I was crazy, telling his friends I was trying to kill him. Kept telling me to get the F out (even though he had no income, had mot worked since his mom passed , 15yrs). I was out of work for 3weeks in shutdown, we got along ok. When I went back to work it got worse. He did not speak to me from June to Aug, I would sit in the yard fireside alone. He needed dental work, so I paid (with savings from covid & HI) .He changed more, paranoid, accusing me of foolish things, bringing up my 1 big past mistake. I def think the med needed adjusting but he would not listen, he was fine. I Planned on moving alone now, secured a job and continued to plan. I got covid in Dec and my Dad passed in Jan so plans changed. He talked bad about me to cousins at my Dads memorial (a man he loved since he was 14). I continued to plan and try to talk to him and save our marriage. When I said to separate, he said no loose ends and said the divorce word. He had no $$ and I was losing myself more and more. I filed in July 2021. I moved to Maui in Sept 2021 and have been here 4 months. Our anniversaries are in a few weeks, 2/18 = 27 yrs married. 2/20= 39 yrs together. Our court date is in March. He has not spoken to me since 3 days before I flew out. I still love and miss him, I definitely ruminate and have deep trauma bonds after 40 yrs. Working on me, daily battle, am homesick for family, friends and my pets still at out family home with him. Am luck to live in paradise to heal but lots of transition and change, still trying to make friends and thrive. Thank you for your info and guidance. Be well
Thank you 🙏
Your story broke my heart, Ive been through a similar experience 20 years ago. My recommendation would be to continue learning about YOU. I have a few book recommendations if you're interested. Much love!!!!
@@nevadadan4113
Update he was a no show for court Friday, Now I have an additional bill for 1700.00, when he wanted this, I just wanted to leave. I have decided to dismiss and let him do what he wants. Spent over 4k now and got nowhere. Crazy