@@yunusaliakbas9192 they are the first if you check the about his channel is linked the second is probably his friend and the third is new with no subs so probably a throwaway
"In the same vein, it's also considered rude to leave your earbuds in your ear while you're talking to people" It's far more rude for others to talk to me while I have my earbuds in my ears and expect me to take them out. There's a reason I have them in my ears: To listen to music and not other people.
I could if it was an abusive spouse that died and the person was already separated long before they died and then the proposal? I mean seems appropriate if no one objects it and hated the person collectively. People are weird and different anyways. 😂
As someone who's autistic, this video was just a list of things I need to try and remember to fit in but inevitably won't. I can't think of anything worse in an already stressing social scenario than eye contact!
Don't worry, not everyone likes to make eye contact. If they try to make eye contact first, try your best to as well. Or ask close friends and family to help you practice eye contact.
@@justsomeperson0 Thanks man. Some advice given to me a long time ago was to just look at their nose when talking and it’s very difficult for the other person to tell otherwise. With eye contact, even forcing myself to do it makes me extremely uncomfortable to the point that I wouldn’t be able to continue the conversation without looking away after a few seconds. I’m definitely much better at it than I was during my childhood though.
@@DiscoCallum No problem. I have issues with eye contact too, but for opposite reasons. I have a 'resting b*tch' kind of face so I always look angry or pissed and when I make eye contact with people it scares them. But yeah, you can practice making eye contact to build confidence. It helps.
Omg exactly what I just commented!! (Except I'm adhd and odd and probably a narcissist but I have most autistic symptoms). So all I saw was rules and my brain says that's a big no no. Also if these rules are so important, why are they "unspoken"? Are they just trying to promote the notion that everyone understands rules when that so isn't true? It's basically erasing neurodivergency from the way I see it
@@MrMainlander depends on the product. 100$ is overall too much for just a pair of wireless earbuds. Especially considering I've used 17$ earbuds that work just as good if not better.
@@Ginglover9000 I'm interested, which one was it? I agree that apple is kind of overrated but my point still stands. If you're working 100$ is not that much money
@@richhornie7000 these aren't 'unspoken rules', that is bs. These are more like how not to irritate people who get irritated at pretty much everything. Like Sending a text message before Going to neighbour's house ? WTF, I'd rather just shout loudly. Or not. My neighbours are not that insecure and know that we live in a healthy society and not in a back stabbing bitchy society.
@6eq uj5 They are actually spoken and written. They're just not official as "rules" in society as some people don't behave the same way as most people do.
I think I agree- at least part of me wants to. But who determines what is right and wrong? If everyone does something, then society accepts it as right.
@@heavens.sorrow don't make decision on what society thinks, have your own thinking (BE YOURSELF), Decide yourself what's right and what's wrong, and the fun part is even if you make mistakes on the process it's worth experience to correct yourself, create yourself, explore yourself.
@@baji740 I don't think you understood my point. I never said I didn't follow my own moral code, infact I was making a point against Mo's statement which implies a universal right and wrong. Lecturing the wrong person, m8. But have a good one.
@@baji740 Sure you say that but at the end of the day if someone does what he wants and is considerred "wrong" then you will just look at him and say "how rude he is" or "how stupid he is" thing is, you only say this usuing words and no actiins
the avoiding to ask a woman her age is weird to me, why feel insecure that you’re ageing, as if every other person in the world isn’t... i once didn’t do the maths right and thought my mom was one year older than she was and that didn’t sit right with her at all. is it because women are exposed daily to the message that the younger they look the more value they have in society?
Nah if a woman feels that insecure about her age then she's overreactive. Do what you want I feel like that question would be the same as asking a chick that's wearing a wig if her hair is real or not. But you don't really know if her hair is real and are genuinely curious
As a person on the high functioning end of the autism spectrum, some of these I can do(social interactions),but I struggle with eye contact and reading body language at times. I enjoy your videos and the content that you cover, and the way that you can communicate abstract ideas about this thing we collectively call life.
In France, if invited to a casual party, please do not arrive on time. The unspoken rule : everyone is at least 15~30 minutes late, unless they're here to help set up the place.
You'll hate my country for this. Not only is common for people to take two spaces, sometimes they even take 3 parking spaces. And expect for cars to be parked on the sidewalks, forcing you to walk on the road and not get hit by a car.
There's an unspoken rule that I wish more waitstaff at restaurants abided by or knew: when people at your tables are praying before they eat, _don't interrupt them._ Even if you don't personally agree with their religious beliefs, don't interrupt them. Wait until they are done. It'll only take a few seconds. The number of times I and my family have been interrupted while saying grace before we eat or order is surprisingly pretty high.
Ngl I knew most of these but not all, and as someone with autism it’s really helpful to know these so I don’t unintentionally break the rules. Thanks aperture
I used to think all of this and I am always considerate. When I observed people not following these basic manners, I thought there is something wrong with me. Thank you @Aperture for making me feel proud of myself :)
« By leaving many of these rules unspoken, we’re able to follow them more naturally. Because some things … are better left unsaid. » That was the cherry on the top in this video
I try to only look at things I wouldn't be embarrassed for others to see in public. But some times, if I'm listening to music (With ear buds of course.) or texting someone, that's not possible.
As an autistic person, all of these unspoken social rules are a pain in my ass! I constantly feel the pull to conform to them, but there's also this aching need that I have to reject them and just go down my own path (I think everyone feels this, it's not just if you're autistic) I struggle with understanding social cues and my energy gets so drained trying to play the part for other people, because I know that I'm not honoring my true self. And 75% of the time, I don't even know what these unspoken social cues are until someone tells me upfront. If I want to be able to survive and make a living, I have to play by these rules and it's exhausting. I wish I could just completely let go and be myself, but I get afraid of what might happen if I show up in my authenticity. My true self has been rejected lots of times, but I also know that I'll suffer a lot internally if I don't learn how to embrace who I am and accept it. I function better when things are clear and straight up, and I feel like it's better to live in a way that is honest than leave things unspoken. I want to try to live in a way that is more true to who I am, even if there may be consequences.
Ever since I made a point to either tell the truth or simply say I don't want to talk about it, I've been surprised at how well even unpleasant or uninteresting truths have been received.
students and Introverts on a large scale are isolated from these rules. That's why sometimes we don't know how to react to a familiar person passing by you. Because we are unaware of the rules.
My aunt chose to raise my cousins without technology, while it might seem good I’m honestly doubting the method now, neither of them know these unwritten rules of using technology, for instance multiple times while I was there I would try to text my friends and they would both immediately lean over my shoulder and start reading my texts, I was like tf who does that 😐 they hardly know how any social media or just the internet in general works, like they shouldn’t have social media at their age but they should at least know what it is, I mean how are these kids gonna get jobs if they don’t know how any technology works????
It all has to do with one rule: Treat others like you want to be treated. We know we don`t like certain things that may have happened to us, like when someone swipes on your phone, so we try to make others feel good by not doing that. And we`re all sort of the same so we just know.
Unfortunately, when some of us treat others as we would want to be treated, we find out that our values and preferences are not the norm and we're left to simultaneously start cataloging our failures (when brought to our attention) for future reference in being harmonious and to accept that pretty much most everyone else is never going to reciprocate. Not a whine mind you. Life is what it is, and it isn't often as simple as people make it out to be.
@@gertvanbeelen1101 If that philosophy has served you well, then by all means, keep at it. Please realize that your experience doesn't necessarily generalize across the population, and real substantive differences do exist between people that sometimes need to be accounted for if our goal is to peacefully coexist. Note: I'm not saying it's good to perseverate or overcomplicate matters either. In a paraphrase of Einstein: A theory should be as simple as possible to fully explain the data, and no simpler. Simply treating others the way I want to be treated has backfired for me.
@@seancooper5140 Then I only have one question. How do you want to be treated? I like it when people don't cross my boundaries and treat me as an equal. And in my experience this works with everyone.
You should make one video about the teaching of Geeta, just like you did before stoicism. Geeta is treasure of knowledge and the way of living a peaceful life.
The "don't blast your music out loud wherever" and "don't look at your phone when someone's talking to you" really got to me. I hate when people those things.
I’ve always wondered why people would you get upset or seen weird when I do certain things and now I realize it was because I broke an unspoken rule without knowing
“ there are two people you don’t lie to” Me: ah yes , your wife and maybe your closest friend or relative “ ... your doctor and your lawyer “ Me: ... ah yes more importantly - yes
Your channel is just amazing! Every video is like taking a tour through your mind and it actually doesn't even matter so much what the topic is. Just nice to listen someone share their perspective.
On my 16th birthday we went to a restaurant and I asked a really pretty waitress I got fond of “how old are you” cause I was curious… lady got so pissed she didn’t even sing me happy birthday with the rest of the staff. It’s been 5 years now and life hasn’t been the same since that day🤧
My favorite friend frpm highskool was the guy who always dropped in unannounced, he loved on my family, it made me feel good to know how comfortable he was
That rule about leaving a last piece of food to the one sharing is something I didn't know. I laways wandered why my roommate always leaves one damn piece of chocolate....
Hey aperture, just some colour grading tips- fix exposure in some shots and don’t use too much of teal look (may be a little bit of desaturation will make it better in some footages). Also try to use other styles. Anyway these are my personal suggestions and as always kudos to the amazing video👏👏.
Dude! Some of these rules I didn't actually know, but I knew it makes me uncomfortable doing or seeing someone do them. Like talking with wireless earbuds in.
In my previous job one time i became so depressed that i didnt wanted to talk to anyone, including my co-workers. So i went to the work and didnt say hi to them then some of them asked me why dont you greet us. and that topic was brought up several times. That was when i realized importance of social rules
Unspoken Rule: Unless facing in the direction of the sun or having issues seeing where you currently stand (although you could just shift/move) I feel it’s courteous to take my sunglasses 😎 off when speaking to someone.
@@julius43461 oh, never once thought of that, I’ve always just seen them as the same as regular glasses. Coming some someone who never wears sunglasses
@@andyzhang7890 Eyes tell so much about us. Hiding behind sunglasses gives you great advantage over the person you are talking with. You have more confidence because the other person can't figure out your mood, or if you are lying or not.
@@julius43461 yea, that's fair. I definitely think eye contact on both ends are a pretty big part of communication, but I understand that isn't universal- some ppl, like those with autism, can't, and some societies, like Japanese, even discourage it
@@andyzhang7890 Oh I probably am on the autism spectrum. I have severe issues with eye contact. That's exactly why I understand the advantage that glasses give you. I was always tempted to wear glasses when talking with people, but wouldn't do it as it feels to me like I am escaping from something.
There is one reason we lie, and well, do anything at all- for ourselves. Nobody lies for someone else, I pity folks who aren't self-aware enough to understand this.
That's too easy of a conclusion bud and life is way too nuanced for that blanket statement. From anecdotal experience alone I can remember circumstances where I lied on behalf of someone else whether it was for them to save face or to prevent/protect from some sort of danger. Even just a minute of brainstorming we can come up with dozens of situations where someone would lie for someone else. Nobody lies for someone else is a cool teen angsty punk song title but shit, use your brain for a second and tell me you cant think of a lie you wouldn't say on behalf of a friend or sibling to someone else?
X person explicitely asked me not to truthfully answer y question if person z inquires. You could say "well you could technically still tell the truth you're only doing it for yourself" but if we use that criteria then every relationship on earth is intrinsically selfish which we know is not true as (most) humans have a much larger range of emotions and we can see selfless behaviour in many instances such a a parent-child relationship. You could further reduce this and say "you only care about the child as it makes you feel better" thus going back to selfishness but this is quite an absurd leap of logic as in doing so you'd essentially be many forms of free will leaving us to be essentially automatons and if we can't control ourselves to a reasonable degree then we can not be selfish as nothing we do is in our control.
Yeah but taking calls in public, without speakers, is also flagged here. These are more like irritation vectors of an emo kid, not the 'unspoken rules' BS.
We do a downward nod to say hi to someone we don't know and an upward nod to say hi to someone we do know. But it doesn't work well if you do them backwards 🤔
It’s public spaces. If they want silence don’t go into public. In the same way “we should give them silence to relax” they “should let us play our music or take our call for the same reasons?”
I agree with you. To be so concerned with the possibility someone is having a bad day so don't play music out loud is kind of off to me. And if someone has a call....I don't get upset that they need to talk to them. Maybe in a library it would be rude but in public? Nah.
Aperture has already made the bold assumption that I wake up and say “good morning” to my neighbours
It’s a bold assumption to even think I wake up, let alone in the morning
It's a truly bold statement for him to think I go out in the morning
It's really a bold assumption that I have neighbors to talk to.
@@binja_ my man ^
yeah all of the above
me: how much stock footage do you use?
aperture: yes
this is not a hate comment, i mean it's better than watching someones gameplay footage
@@Martiganz_ I think it better since it keep people mind interested
@@Martiganz_ gameplay distracted my mind
@@vmrobi011 same here
@@Martiganz_ absolutely I agree
This kind of footage needs time and work to collect as well
Aperture never runs out of high quality video ideas I swear
ruclips.net/video/E5NqwcwjGqY/видео.html
@@choicethetaurus i would dislike but they way you self promo is pretty funny so i let it go. plus the song isnt half bad.
@@choicethetaurus While i don’t encourage it. This not a bad self promo.
Why do these replies seem so staged
@@yunusaliakbas9192 they are the first if you check the about his channel is linked the second is probably his friend and the third is new with no subs so probably a throwaway
That calm voice with the most exotic topics......a click is never a second away from the notification sound. Great vid as usual.
Yes indeed
You get a sound?
Not really calming but ok
He is a lo-fi person
@@GoldLND morning ion your baby 🍼 is doing kouyou you
I really like that Aperture doesn’t have a set and done topic he talks about. He makes videos on literally anything interesting. Love your videos!
Heck, the next video could be about you
@@germandragoon6p108 ya
True thats what i am trying also
ruclips.net/video/nOB0NQOqzmw/видео.html
Ikrrr
"In the same vein, it's also considered rude to leave your earbuds in your ear while you're talking to people" It's far more rude for others to talk to me while I have my earbuds in my ears and expect me to take them out. There's a reason I have them in my ears: To listen to music and not other people.
agreed
You're right
@@silasdavid1999 he really is though
"... are better left unsaid." -said the guy who just said all the things
Lol yea that ending was honestly a little odd considering he just contradicted his entire video
@@andyzhang7890 life is a contradiction
@@callmeenzy5715 Life being a contradiction is a contradiction.
*Endless loop*
@@LeanoSamwinga IT BEGINS BUT NEVER ENDS
@@callmeenzy5715 read hegel
Imagine proposing at a funeral or asking someone if you could propose at their funeral
I could if it was an abusive spouse that died and the person was already separated long before they died and then the proposal? I mean seems appropriate if no one objects it and hated the person collectively. People are weird and different anyways. 😂
Well, if you ask someone if you can propose at their funeral they are not going to say no are they.....
@@creationbeatsuk yes they are
And if they refuse, just kick the dead body until they say yes.
@Sammie Freshener whatever makes you feel better about reality bud
Didn’t realize what I typed was that hard to read. 😂
The vid:
Society: You know the rules and so do I...
A full commitment's what I'm thinking of
You wouldn't get this from any other guy...
@@phonixcharged4966 I just want to tell you how I'm feeling! 😡
@@maxezzy1282 Gotta make you understand
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let u down
Never gonna run around and desert u
@@reya9620
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.
As someone who's autistic, this video was just a list of things I need to try and remember to fit in but inevitably won't. I can't think of anything worse in an already stressing social scenario than eye contact!
Don't worry, not everyone likes to make eye contact. If they try to make eye contact first, try your best to as well. Or ask close friends and family to help you practice eye contact.
@@justsomeperson0 Thanks man. Some advice given to me a long time ago was to just look at their nose when talking and it’s very difficult for the other person to tell otherwise. With eye contact, even forcing myself to do it makes me extremely uncomfortable to the point that I wouldn’t be able to continue the conversation without looking away after a few seconds. I’m definitely much better at it than I was during my childhood though.
@@DiscoCallum No problem. I have issues with eye contact too, but for opposite reasons. I have a 'resting b*tch' kind of face so I always look angry or pissed and when I make eye contact with people it scares them. But yeah, you can practice making eye contact to build confidence. It helps.
@@justsomeperson0 people said I look grumpy even tho is my normal face, sometimes I scare people away -_-
Omg exactly what I just commented!! (Except I'm adhd and odd and probably a narcissist but I have most autistic symptoms). So all I saw was rules and my brain says that's a big no no.
Also if these rules are so important, why are they "unspoken"? Are they just trying to promote the notion that everyone understands rules when that so isn't true? It's basically erasing neurodivergency from the way I see it
I need you to seriously answer this. You have stock footage worth of how many gigabytes?
he could make a whole video of that stock footage
wait..
ruclips.net/video/eZNvCtwXM_0/видео.html
*Terabytes
I think you mean terabytes.
*exabytes
Alternate title:Tips on how to blend in human society
Facts these are just tips to follow for me since im really awkward in public lol
I just wanna be a frog, is that too much to ask for? I didn't sign up anywhere obligating me to be normal.
@@stephencurry3502
Same, human same :(
Aliens : Write that down! Write that down!
@@giantspacemonstr as an alien I agree
Plot Twist: Aperture doesn't use stock footage but actually goes out and films tons of random people
I wonder where he gets it from.
Aperture really gets all the value out of his stock footage subscription
Robots, Aliens, and Demons will be studying this to go undetected in society..
The unspoken rule of society:
You live in it.
Yo bet, if i never get out of my basement, im technically not a member of society
@@nulled7888 You just replied on this comment, that automatically makes you a member, like it or not.
@@ManipulateHavoc well if you define the internet as a society, then yes. But who would :d
@@nulled7888 Pretty sure in this generation everyone defines it that way. However there’s no escape from society even if you don’t use the internet
We live in a society...
There's many people in the world who need to watch this and learn
Facts
yeah but I rather not listen
There are*
“get a pair of wireless earbuds… they‘re pretty cheap“
*shows pair of AirPods*
100$ is pretty cheap tho
@@MrMainlander depends on the product. 100$ is overall too much for just a pair of wireless earbuds. Especially considering I've used 17$ earbuds that work just as good if not better.
Or you can get the Raycon e25 everyday pro earbuds
@@Ginglover9000 I'm interested, which one was it? I agree that apple is kind of overrated but my point still stands. If you're working 100$ is not that much money
@@notryan7220 i was certain they would be the sponsor of the video lol
Not asking a woman her age is how you get arrested.
Lmaoooo
The. It wouldn't be a woman who u asked
Lmao
I wonder why? Can someone please answer? Thanks
If she looks older than 20, don't ask her age
Whenever I wear earbuds, that's when everyone has something to say.
Earbuds mean No Talking, goodbye....
I swear people around me breaks these rules a dozen times in a day
As they should
@@schnitzelberry why they should?
@@schnitzelberry what??
@@richhornie7000 these aren't 'unspoken rules', that is bs. These are more like how not to irritate people who get irritated at pretty much everything.
Like Sending a text message before Going to neighbour's house ? WTF, I'd rather just shout loudly. Or not. My neighbours are not that insecure and know that we live in a healthy society and not in a back stabbing bitchy society.
@@giantspacemonstr you seem to be quite irritated by this video
This shows a lot about the unspoken rules of society and its future.
When I read this comment I realised *w e l i v e i n a s o c i e t y*
@6eq uj5 uhh it's in the title, plus r/woooosh
@6eq uj5 They are actually spoken and written. They're just not official as "rules" in society as some people don't behave the same way as most people do.
As someone who doesn't know most social rules, this was a great video.
Those who know dont watch such videos
Right is right even if nobody is doing it and wrong is wrong even if everyone is doing it
I think I agree- at least part of me wants to. But who determines what is right and wrong? If everyone does something, then society accepts it as right.
that is true
@@heavens.sorrow don't make decision on what society thinks, have your own thinking (BE YOURSELF), Decide yourself what's right and what's wrong, and the fun part is even if you make mistakes on the process it's worth experience to correct yourself, create yourself, explore yourself.
@@baji740 I don't think you understood my point. I never said I didn't follow my own moral code, infact I was making a point against Mo's statement which implies a universal right and wrong. Lecturing the wrong person, m8. But have a good one.
@@baji740 Sure you say that but at the end of the day if someone does what he wants and is considerred "wrong" then you will just look at him and say "how rude he is" or "how stupid he is" thing is, you only say this usuing words and no actiins
the avoiding to ask a woman her age is weird to me, why feel insecure that you’re ageing, as if every other person in the world isn’t...
i once didn’t do the maths right and thought my mom was one year older than she was and that didn’t sit right with her at all.
is it because women are exposed daily to the message that the younger they look the more value they have in society?
Holy shit bro
Sup Aristotle
Yep
Nah if a woman feels that insecure about her age then she's overreactive. Do what you want
I feel like that question would be the same as asking a chick that's wearing a wig if her hair is real or not. But you don't really know if her hair is real and are genuinely curious
*возраст всего лишь цифра*
As a person on the high functioning end of the autism spectrum, some of these I can do(social interactions),but I struggle with eye contact and reading body language at times. I enjoy your videos and the content that you cover, and the way that you can communicate abstract ideas about this thing we collectively call life.
"get wireless ear buds, there cheap": shows stock footage of 119$ apple air pods
Or what I call “unwritten Laws” which I’ve been analyzing lately, I can’t believe the coincidence
i have noticed that when i come back from an extensive trip the invisible rules are easier to spot.
@@arsenhere7020 hahaha true
ruclips.net/video/E5NqwcwjGqY/видео.html
@@choicethetaurus Good voice.
@@choicethetaurus tbh this the best self promo ive ever heard.
In France, if invited to a casual party, please do not arrive on time. The unspoken rule : everyone is at least 15~30 minutes late, unless they're here to help set up the place.
The unspoken rules of society get broken by my friends on a daily basis ;-;
Psychopaths
@@Zimboprenuer Y e S
Bruh fr
As they should lol
Another unspoken rule: Don't take two parking spaces for your car unless it has genuine value (and or) age to it. Especially in a busy parking lot.
Once parked somewehre, where 2 cars were on each 2 parking spots. I hate them till this day
@@rubykanima Disgusting. :(
You'll hate my country for this. Not only is common for people to take two spaces, sometimes they even take 3 parking spaces. And expect for cars to be parked on the sidewalks, forcing you to walk on the road and not get hit by a car.
There's an unspoken rule that I wish more waitstaff at restaurants abided by or knew: when people at your tables are praying before they eat, _don't interrupt them._ Even if you don't personally agree with their religious beliefs, don't interrupt them. Wait until they are done. It'll only take a few seconds. The number of times I and my family have been interrupted while saying grace before we eat or order is surprisingly pretty high.
"Don't ask a man his height"
-Sun tzu The Art of War
😂😂😂
There are so many social rules that it’s almost impossible to know all of them I’m always worried that I’m going to break one
Ngl I knew most of these but not all, and as someone with autism it’s really helpful to know these so I don’t unintentionally break the rules. Thanks aperture
I used to think all of this and I am always considerate. When I observed people not following these basic manners, I thought there is something wrong with me. Thank you @Aperture for making me feel proud of myself :)
Never ever kick a man in the nuts unless you are about to get killed.
« By leaving many of these rules unspoken, we’re able to follow them more naturally. Because some things … are better left unsaid. » That was the cherry on the top in this video
I just wanna say I'm a big fan.Watched your shower thoughts videos one day and instantly got hooked.Keep up the good work😊
I try to only look at things I wouldn't be embarrassed for others to see in public. But some times, if I'm listening to music (With ear buds of course.) or texting someone, that's not possible.
The listening society: a metamodern guide to politics
This book is good
What is it about?
@@angelinaa8004 I will butcher the concept, (dyslexia) I suggest you google metamoderna :-)
@@angelinaa8004 I would like to know what you think about it 😀
Your thought process must be amazing. High quality content. Every time. ❤️
ruclips.net/video/nOB0NQOqzmw/видео.html
A common sense/courtesy instructional video. Much needed in today's world.
there so many things that I didn't even know before watching this video, thanks for educating us on those unspoken rules!
As an autistic person, all of these unspoken social rules are a pain in my ass! I constantly feel the pull to conform to them, but there's also this aching need that I have to reject them and just go down my own path (I think everyone feels this, it's not just if you're autistic) I struggle with understanding social cues and my energy gets so drained trying to play the part for other people, because I know that I'm not honoring my true self. And 75% of the time, I don't even know what these unspoken social cues are until someone tells me upfront.
If I want to be able to survive and make a living, I have to play by these rules and it's exhausting. I wish I could just completely let go and be myself, but I get afraid of what might happen if I show up in my authenticity. My true self has been rejected lots of times, but I also know that I'll suffer a lot internally if I don't learn how to embrace who I am and accept it. I function better when things are clear and straight up, and I feel like it's better to live in a way that is honest than leave things unspoken. I want to try to live in a way that is more true to who I am, even if there may be consequences.
Ever since I made a point to either tell the truth or simply say I don't want to talk about it, I've been surprised at how well even unpleasant or uninteresting truths have been received.
students and Introverts on a large scale are isolated from these rules.
That's why sometimes we don't know how to react to a familiar person passing by you.
Because we are unaware of the rules.
Just because you're introverted doesn't mean you're stupid
it bothers me that a lot of these things don't make any sense. and it bothers me that they're unspoken.
My aunt chose to raise my cousins without technology, while it might seem good I’m honestly doubting the method now, neither of them know these unwritten rules of using technology, for instance multiple times while I was there I would try to text my friends and they would both immediately lean over my shoulder and start reading my texts, I was like tf who does that 😐 they hardly know how any social media or just the internet in general works, like they shouldn’t have social media at their age but they should at least know what it is, I mean how are these kids gonna get jobs if they don’t know how any technology works????
Don't worrie, every single younger cousin looks over ur shoulder when u literally have any screen on
It all has to do with one rule: Treat others like you want to be treated. We know we don`t like certain things that may have happened to us, like when someone swipes on your phone, so we try to make others feel good by not doing that. And we`re all sort of the same so we just know.
I think that works as a general rule but I’ve met so many different people in my life that I definitely don’t think that’s applicable across the board
Unfortunately, when some of us treat others as we would want to be treated, we find out that our values and preferences are not the norm and we're left to simultaneously start cataloging our failures (when brought to our attention) for future reference in being harmonious and to accept that pretty much most everyone else is never going to reciprocate.
Not a whine mind you. Life is what it is, and it isn't often as simple as people make it out to be.
@@seancooper5140 Life`s as simple as you make it to be.
@@gertvanbeelen1101
If that philosophy has served you well, then by all means, keep at it.
Please realize that your experience doesn't necessarily generalize across the population, and real substantive differences do exist between people that sometimes need to be accounted for if our goal is to peacefully coexist.
Note: I'm not saying it's good to perseverate or overcomplicate matters either. In a paraphrase of Einstein: A theory should be as simple as possible to fully explain the data, and no simpler.
Simply treating others the way I want to be treated has backfired for me.
@@seancooper5140 Then I only have one question. How do you want to be treated? I like it when people don't cross my boundaries and treat me as an equal. And in my experience this works with everyone.
The Unspoken Rules of Society:
#1 Don't Speak About It
#2 Be About It
Yeah, fight club 👍✊👊👎🖕💪. See you at the ring tonight bro.
"Sometimes, some things are better left unsaid"
Then how would we learn?
That quote is so stupid
I'm surprised you didn't put it "Don't scream at retail workers"
That's a spoken rule
I rarely see that in my country. It must be an American thing.
You should make one video about the teaching of Geeta, just like you did before stoicism. Geeta is treasure of knowledge and the way of living a peaceful life.
"dont play music out loud on the bus"
every roadman in the uk:
Me anywhere:
It’s always the full volume slowthai aha
The "don't blast your music out loud wherever" and "don't look at your phone when someone's talking to you" really got to me. I hate when people those things.
The rules are no longer “unspoken”.
I’ve always wondered why people would you get upset or seen weird when I do certain things and now I realize it was because I broke an unspoken rule without knowing
“ there are two people you don’t lie to”
Me: ah yes , your wife and maybe your closest friend or relative
“ ... your doctor and your lawyer “
Me: ... ah yes more importantly - yes
These videos are always a good watch
“Get wireless ear buds. They’re pretty cheap”
Air pod max being 500 plus
“Uh yeah, cheap man”
Usually you can ask a woman you think is younger than 20 their age, but if they're over 20 it's seen as disrespectful. Wierd.
Aperture is one step away from becoming an ASMR channel
Your channel is just amazing! Every video is like taking a tour through your mind and it actually doesn't even matter so much what the topic is. Just nice to listen someone share their perspective.
On my 16th birthday we went to a restaurant and I asked a really pretty waitress I got fond of “how old are you” cause I was curious… lady got so pissed she didn’t even sing me happy birthday with the rest of the staff. It’s been 5 years now and life hasn’t been the same since that day🤧
Might as well asked what her bra size was...
My favorite friend frpm highskool was the guy who always dropped in unannounced, he loved on my family, it made me feel good to know how comfortable he was
That rule about leaving a last piece of food to the one sharing is something I didn't know.
I laways wandered why my roommate always leaves one damn piece of chocolate....
That's a really good thumbnail and title keep up the grind Aperture :)
Hey aperture, just some colour grading tips- fix exposure in some shots and don’t use too much of teal look (may be a little bit of desaturation will make it better in some footages). Also try to use other styles. Anyway these are my personal suggestions and as always kudos to the amazing video👏👏.
Dude! Some of these rules I didn't actually know, but I knew it makes me uncomfortable doing or seeing someone do them. Like talking with wireless earbuds in.
alternate title: 13 mins tutorial on how to be a decent human being
Mark Zuckerberg is watching
i would call it more of a 13 minute tutorial on how to be a neurotypical
I'd say this is a 13 minute tutorial of how to mask and blend in with the neurotypicals.
In my previous job one time i became so depressed that i didnt wanted to talk to anyone, including my co-workers. So i went to the work and didnt say hi to them then some of them asked me why dont you greet us. and that topic was brought up several times. That was when i realized importance of social rules
life: you only get so much of me, try to make the best of it!
society: live your life for me, you're being rude.
This shit ain’t unspoken rules it’s respect ✊🏽💯
Unspoken Rule: Unless facing in the direction of the sun or having issues seeing where you currently stand (although you could just shift/move) I feel it’s courteous to take my sunglasses 😎 off when speaking to someone.
Absolutely, I think it's rude to talk with someone while wearing sunglasses.
@@julius43461 oh, never once thought of that, I’ve always just seen them as the same as regular glasses. Coming some someone who never wears sunglasses
@@andyzhang7890 Eyes tell so much about us. Hiding behind sunglasses gives you great advantage over the person you are talking with.
You have more confidence because the other person can't figure out your mood, or if you are lying or not.
@@julius43461 yea, that's fair. I definitely think eye contact on both ends are a pretty big part of communication, but I understand that isn't universal- some ppl, like those with autism, can't, and some societies, like Japanese, even discourage it
@@andyzhang7890 Oh I probably am on the autism spectrum. I have severe issues with eye contact. That's exactly why I understand the advantage that glasses give you. I was always tempted to wear glasses when talking with people, but wouldn't do it as it feels to me like I am escaping from something.
I swear I’m not an alien attempting to learn how to blend into human society.
Rule No1 : If you're going to tell the truth, make people laugh, or they'll kill you
Your videos just comfort me way to much
I love how social etiquette is often different around the world, even for things we think are obvious and unshakable. Like eye contact.
I could sleep to these videos, his voice is so calming
Well I actually slept hearing his soothing voice lol 😆
"Get a pair of wireless earbuds, their pretty cheap"
$170 😂
There is one reason we lie, and well, do anything at all- for ourselves. Nobody lies for someone else, I pity folks who aren't self-aware enough to understand this.
That's too easy of a conclusion bud and life is way too nuanced for that blanket statement. From anecdotal experience alone I can remember circumstances where I lied on behalf of someone else whether it was for them to save face or to prevent/protect from some sort of danger.
Even just a minute of brainstorming we can come up with dozens of situations where someone would lie for someone else. Nobody lies for someone else is a cool teen angsty punk song title but shit, use your brain for a second and tell me you cant think of a lie you wouldn't say on behalf of a friend or sibling to someone else?
X person explicitely asked me not to truthfully answer y question if person z inquires. You could say "well you could technically still tell the truth you're only doing it for yourself" but if we use that criteria then every relationship on earth is intrinsically selfish which we know is not true as (most) humans have a much larger range of emotions and we can see selfless behaviour in many instances such a a parent-child relationship. You could further reduce this and say "you only care about the child as it makes you feel better" thus going back to selfishness but this is quite an absurd leap of logic as in doing so you'd essentially be many forms of free will leaving us to be essentially automatons and if we can't control ourselves to a reasonable degree then we can not be selfish as nothing we do is in our control.
"human are social animal and we thrive in group" - Extrovert
"wtf? No we don't. We don't like people and we thrive alone!!" - Introvert
Exactly I can't imagine being a extrovert
@@user-ii4oi4pw3z haha same lol
Me, an ambivert : 👁👄👁
I know right I find it hard to believe because I like being alone
I’m 15 and I didn’t know half of these rules lol. Thanks for letting me know!
Unspoken rule: public speaker phone conversation. Very annoying
Karen
Yeah but taking calls in public, without speakers, is also flagged here. These are more like irritation vectors of an emo kid, not the 'unspoken rules' BS.
You would be my friend man , highly empathic and special people deserve credits , keep it up.
We live in a society
There is no such thing as society...Margrot Thatcher
I don’t know these rules. It’s like a big secret. Thank god I found this video, it’s actually very helpful and insightful to someone with ASD.
"Get a pair of wireless earbuds. 'They're pretty cheap'"
Never given a thought about these....but now iam thinking that...and this really feels amazing :)
Much love from Sub-Saharan Africa 🥰😍
I love your vids because they are not structured but instead they flow smoothly and make it so I never want to leave the vid
Interesting. I never knew these because I am an unsocial creature by nature.
We do a downward nod to say hi to someone we don't know and an upward nod to say hi to someone we do know. But it doesn't work well if you do them backwards 🤔
"Get a pair of wireless ear buds"
Is it ok to use wired headphones ?
Ah yes, 3:31am perfect time to watch aperture's video
"Don´t look someone’s phone in the public transport"
Latin america: Do you guys can use your phone in the public transport?
@VisualPlugin the Multilingual Programmer cause you will get robed :v
It’s public spaces. If they want silence don’t go into public. In the same way “we should give them silence to relax” they “should let us play our music or take our call for the same reasons?”
I agree with you. To be so concerned with the possibility someone is having a bad day so don't play music out loud is kind of off to me. And if someone has a call....I don't get upset that they need to talk to them. Maybe in a library it would be rude but in public? Nah.
Fastest click of my life
If only all the youtube videos were as good as these ones, or even better. In my opinion, this video was one of the best ones I've watched so far.