I am experiencing a prolonged and emotionally destructive separation and divorce. During this, I have found myself watching lots of videos of live musical performances. At first, I thought I was using the music to help me deal. Later I realized that I had become fascinated by the interactions of musicians as they play. I am not much of a musician but I have come to understand that this type of interaction is what I crave both from an intimate relationship, and with friends and colleagues. This is not shameful to me. I realize that in the aftermath of the destruction of my former life, that what I need, to be healthy, is healthy connections, not complete isolation brought on by hurt and fear. This video serves as a very potent confirmation. Thank you Teal.
The fact that you’ve realized this means you are healing. Keep going. What a brave and beautiful person you are. Gift yourself the time, space and grace you need and well deserve right now to fall back in love with yourself so that when you’re ready to love someone again they will not be able to love you any less than how you love yourself. It will not be possible because you will not let allow any less than you need and deserve and you won’t even have to try to get what you need. It will just be the standard your heart and soul has set. So, love yourself beyond all measure and the love you receive in return will be beyond measure as well. ❤
It's important to know the difference between codependence, independence, and interdependence. Interdependence is what a healthy relationship looks like. It's about believing you have value to offer and are also worthy to receive.
U kno what that's the kinda bs people don't need to here. Did u even watch the whole clip.? We all have needs in common. Why complicate things n induce suppression of emotions and needs.
@lja8534 Yes I watched it to the end. She even referred to interdependence herself. There is some nuance to the subject. I recommend just looking up those definitions and just bounce it off what she says. I'm not antagonizing, just sharing something I believe to be helpful.
@lja8534 Here’s a breakdown of codependence, independence, and interdependence in relationships: Codependence Definition: A dynamic where one or both partners rely excessively on the other for emotional support, validation, or a sense of identity. Boundaries are often blurred, and self-worth becomes tied to the relationship. Characteristics: Difficulty functioning or feeling whole without the other person. One partner may sacrifice their own needs to maintain the relationship. A tendency to "fix" or control the other person to maintain security. Emotional enmeshment, where one person’s mood heavily impacts the other. Example: Partner A constantly seeks Partner B’s approval and feels anxious or unworthy when it’s not given, while Partner B feels obligated to meet all of Partner A’s emotional needs. Independence Definition: A state where individuals prioritize their autonomy, personal goals, and self-sufficiency, often to the point of minimizing reliance on the relationship. Characteristics: Clear boundaries and strong individual identity. A reluctance to depend on or share vulnerability with the partner. Emphasis on "me" over "we," sometimes at the expense of intimacy. Can lead to isolation or emotional distance if taken to extremes. Example: Partner A focuses on their career and personal growth but avoids opening up emotionally to Partner B, keeping the relationship surface-level. Interdependence Definition: A healthy balance between connection and autonomy, where partners maintain their individuality while mutually supporting each other’s growth and well-being. Characteristics: Clear boundaries with mutual respect for individuality. Emotional support without losing one’s sense of self. Collaboration and shared goals while maintaining personal aspirations. Both partners feel empowered to give and receive freely. Example: Partner A and Partner B share emotional vulnerability, support each other’s dreams, and also pursue individual interests, creating a sense of mutual fulfillment and trust. Key Differences: Codependence: Over-reliance and enmeshment. Independence: Emphasis on self-sufficiency, often to the detriment of intimacy. Interdependence: A balanced approach that honors both individuality and partnership. In essence, interdependence represents the healthiest dynamic, where both partners contribute to a relationship that fosters growth, trust, and mutual respect without sacrificing personal identity.
@@lja8534i think her words can be also mistaken for excuse for bottomless pit type of people who drain others to death but don't offer anything themselves. Don't confuse them with people who can give something back and aren't just leaching and asking for excuses or wanting to be one sided nursing agent for others.
I always had a very small family and was raised by a single mother. The pain of loneliness can be very deep. I wish to experience genuine connection and belonging 💔💛
Hearing this from someone that’s an example to me, confirmed the very things I always felt when being in the spiritual field. I never felt at home. Knowing and feeling the needs summed up in the video where never met, I feel like a ghost. I see why I never thrive, no matter how many spiritual practices I do. I feel hollow, and the very thing that scares me the most are humans, yet I crave the needs a lot. I used to say I choose this, from a souls perspective, and I gaslighted myself everything with it. I’m human, and I have human needs. I knew it all a long, now I knew I was right
Right. I've acknowledged this truth for decades, while living my entire incarnation with most of my needs unmet. Most if not all humans I've loved and do love, seem to not show mutual desire to meet my needs while I help them meet theirs. I move away from people who don't respect my needs and goals, seek to meet new people who may have a shared mutual desire, while also giving generously when I can as much as I can without erasing my own efforts and time required to "fill my own cup"and respect myself. Life continues on and I still don't have friends, a partner, a family that desire to collaborate and share lives together as designed.
Agreed. What galls me is the hypocrisy of every women I have ever met who weaponize every manner of social, relational, emotional need to their own advantage (resource extraction) and then will use their abundant sexuality as a predatory way to extract power. Given this, and all manner of double standards, social, legal, and otherwise, of course most men are very afraid of monogamy, dependence, marriage, commitment, and all manner of collective action abuse. Most men are seriously traumatized, and no help and support is available to them at all, from any quarter -- even other men. Only some men (and nearly no women at all) have loyalty, honor commitments, and maintain responsibility to agreements to provide, whereas women, if any even temporary feeling suggests otherwise, will quickly discard any and all responsibilities to anyone else at all. From there, I see no generosity, only expectation of princess treatment and entitlement. So anything you give as help another with their emotional or relational needs is immediately taken for granted by them, with zero to none reciprocity, and abundant entitlement, if you are a man giving to a woman, and hence, when you are discovering such lopsidedness, elect very reasonably and rationally, to pull back, you end up with (necessary) distance -- which just means that you are even more alone. Hence the cycle continues. More necessary isolationism. Modernism sucks.
Some people have huge capacity and some have none. How can we ever balance this without turning into each other? I think she is missing something here, i have listened to her repeating this for years. I am in the same situation like you described and have completely gone hermit mode after the realisation that people use me as a free general resource and when the time comes to return the favor they reveal they have nothing to give or are not being able. How can we move on from being focused on people who have nothing to give? Because i am tired of small souls. It's not anymore my job to feed indefinitely hungry people.
I hear you both, in the same boat unfortunately. I can't tell if refusing to settle is necessary to finding the right relationships or if settling is actually required in all relationships... So confused 😂
Having come away from a relationship with a so-called 'spiritually enlightened' partner, I'm really enjoying Teal's videos ripping on the spiritual ideology and persona. Everything she said in this video sums up what I tried to brainwash myself into believing whilst in that relationship - that I was 'needy' for having needs, and should be able to provide myself with every single need I have. That to depend upon another was simply a character weakness.
Another take: I got to look at modern relationships through the eyes of a 22yo single mom who survived an abusive relationship with her child's father. I looked into her eyes as she became extremely vulnerable, and said, "I fear I will not be able to trust another person for the rest of my life." These traumatizing experiences individuals have faced are killing relationships that could be healthy dependencies.
My friend was just left with 3 young children when her partner of 15 years decided he wanted a younger subordinate at work. He got to walk away FREE, falling into the comfort of a codependent relationship, she has to deal with the rude awakening of instantaneously becoming a single mom overnight. They could barely survive on two incomes. How is she supposed to sustain on ONE!? How is she ever supposed to trust someone again, let alone trust someone with her children!? 💔
@@stellaallbright4750 When you consider your friend's adversity she's about to face it's bad, but with a good support network it's doable. She needs those she can depend on to rally around her. It's your last line that is the real problem, in my eyes, and one that is tying my stomach into knots. The 22yo, soon to be 24yo, woman in my comment has fallen hard for a fellow. A fellow that they met seven weeks ago. I hear he has a lot of money and loves to spend it lavishly on this woman. (btw, I've seen some photos and videos of this dude, and he is nice looking and well built. I can see why she's smitten.) I realize that it's my overactive imagination that is causing my gut pain. I'm just afraid she'll be blinded by the sense of security he provides and not properly vet this dude before introducing him to her child. And since I use to work at CPS, my imagination is being fueled by the numerous stories I've heard.
@@stellaallbright4750 And about her life-partner getting a free pass, that should never happen. I've heard that divorce courts will award the woman with at least half their partners assets, and maybe more, since she has the children.
@@stellaallbright4750 Have you heard the expression, "Pumped and dumped?" Based off of several Tik Tok videos that I've seen, there seems to be a segment of that male population that target vulnerable women in your friend's situation.
Growing up, "home" wasn't emotionally safe, and I was bullied as a young child as well. I relate to this video a lot. It's not as if I strive for independence, or don't recognize the fact that independence is an illusion. But I still fear depending on others (too much). I have friends and brothers I can (and do, to an extent) depend on. But I am very cautious about it. The difference, to me, is that being "overly" dependent increases the chance for me to experience intense/active pain inflicted on me by others, whereas unfulfilled dependency is a gentler/passive pain I've learned to endure. I think many people find it difficult to find people who they can trust to truly depend on, and even when finding such people, we learn not to overburden them. We are all born ignorant, many of us start out being overly trusting, which leads to relational trauma, which leads to us reducing our desire for and trust in dependency. Ultimately, the root of the problem lies in the nature of dependence itself. It is not a problem we can solve ourselves. You can't MAKE yourself feel safe getting close to others, or opening up to others. It is an environmental factor others have to create for us which we can then embrace. If we try to force it, disappointment/re-traumatization becomes inevitable. You can't breathe underwater, and you can't feel safe when you aren't. And even people who mean well aren't unconditionally safe. So it's a balancing act. How close can I get, how open can I be, without drastically increasing the chances of getting hurt? And when I do choose to (actively) depend on others, it is preceded by my acceptance of the possibility that the floor might vanish from under me.
Thank you so much for making this video 🙏 I have been saying for years now (without being heard or agreed with) that this myth in the spiritual community that’s been repeated over and over like an anthem that “I need to be 💯 self reliant and capable of making myself FULLY HAPPY ALONE WITHOUT NEEDING ANYONE before I will find love or my tribe” is DAMAGING and has felt impossible! I’ve always said it’s human nature to need people and no ones “vibration” is perfect and who can be truly happy alone? I’ve said it was a farce and an unfair expectation and been told that I’m just codependent so I don’t understand. This is vindicating. 🙏 Much appreciated 👍😊
I've been told that "you have to be happy alone before being happy with someone else" thing so many times. 😒 The funny thing is that everyone that's said this is to me is in a unhappy relationship.
@@Tim_G_BennettI've heard this so many times and it felt wrong and hurt me. It feels like being made fun of when people who tell you these things, have families and probably can't even remember to come home to an empty apartment. I used to believe them... Now I think that they can f*** off. Now I know that people heal in relationships not when meditating and doing yoga all alone and lonely in their stupid little apartments.
I used to think success was all about working harder. Then I read The Secret Doctrine of Wealth, and it completely shifted my mindset. It’s amazing how much clarity can come from the right book.
I don't mind dependency. I looked for, and look to others, but I HATE to be controlled. I hate to be hurt, and backstabbed. Show me a person alive that I can trust with myself, and I'll show you my willingness to be dependent.
@@vlst8715 Yes, and "when relational literacy and boundaries" best practices fail us, we grieve the years of loss doing our due diligences only to find another failed attempt at leading our best life.
Thank you. One of the things I realized in the most painful days is that even the most “independent” humans are highly dependent on one humans for things like food, clothing, gadgets, etc. Any time I brought this up to others, 90% of them said that they get everything “from within” and got mad.
Thank you, Teal. I was aware that I was neglected and starving from needs being met, yet only yesterday I realized how much I've started to obsessively try to meet them myself - and definitely with that destroying myself. Over and over I tried so hard to self soothe, calm down, feel into my feelings of fear and anxiety as well, yet it felt difficult to me and often frustrating, leaving me with a fear that I couldn't regulate, even when I'm 17 "already". I noticed that I never learned how to even self soothed and there was not much or any co-regulation in my childhood. I'm now trying to really accept that I need someone, specifically someone through whom I can experience the co-regulation that has been missing and let that be the base that hasn't been there before, to actually feel more stable and be able to learn regulation myself - in a healthy way, without letting those dependency needs be unmet or fighting them, through which I will honestly never find true regulation either, right? Acknowledging it feels good, but honestly so f*ing crappy too. Admitting that I want someone that takes my hand and that is fine with going in the pace that is okay with me, being there, listening and helping me to regulate, without shaming me for not being able to yet. Someone that is there the way I needed it, to develop healthy instead of crippled. I must sound more optimistic or positive than I actually am about it, but maybe expressing it and sharing it makes me feel lighter and hearing about how someone else might relate to this🤎 (ps I already looked for therapists)
I agree, a sense of community, requires both dependency and interdependency with individuals in the group and the group as a whole. Alot of indigenous cultures foundations are built on this.
Had to come back to write another comment. This video has been MASSIVE to me. Wow. It's made me realise why I've always felt a bit uncomfortable with people who adamantly insist that being single/having no friends/doing their own thing is what's right for them - that they have everything they need in themselves. Because this goes against our innate wiring. Why do humans enjoy love stories? Because we see harmony being restored. Why does grief hurt so much when we lose someone? Because of the loss of our own. Why do people care so much what others think? Because we fear being alienated from our clan. All these are signs that prove what Teal is saying here. These aren't just little 'annoyances'... they stem from a much deeper place. Clearly a need. If you wiped the planet of humans and anything humans had ever made, then put one human back on the planet, how long do you reckon they would live for?
2:40 - 3:23 Wow that's a lot of dependency needs.... I probably only experienced like 5 of them. I remember one time my neighbor father passed away and she came to my door to tell me. At one point I had reached my arm behind her and gave her pat/rub, a soothing gesture. And in that moment I felt something powerful I never felt before. I dunno what it was, but trying to connect with her and listen to her so intimately just sparked something in me I never felt before. I've helped out others many times and been there for them so I'm not sure why I felt that. 4:40 - 4:52 What if life shows that nobody really wants to be apart of your dependency needs? What are you supposed to do? First it was my parents, then people in general who don't like the real me. Probably explains why I avoid performative work like the plague. 4:55 - 5:12 I went into independence as much as I can because I couldn't get my dependency needs met in a healthy manner from those around me. Fortunately, I never believed such things... I am aware that I'm not supposed to meet my dependency needs on my own.
thats the thing, were men. we SHOULD have people to emotionally lean on and/or meet our needs. but people want us to fulfill THEIR needs. and dont think about the other way around. people are like hungry wild dogs. they see you, they see "meat" , not a companion took me years to realize people are just good-looking-animals. (REALLY good looking, but still lol lmao) look up joe rogans chimpanzee story. its the RXACT same as human behavior, accept were less hairy
Yes....thank you for specifically stating the "In order to".... Namely, to "thrive"on a physical, emotional mental and even spiritual level". Something I've noticed in myself is that I will often say "I don't need such and such"... But I'm not even considering the idea of "thriving" when I say it. I'm usually coming from a place of "surviving", given all of the facts of life that I perceive as almost unavoidable in today's world. For me it's about feeling I have "accepted" the realities of which needs others are and are not likely "capable" of providing…and then consciouly "choosing" what I can most easily live without. So, the way you've stated it, I would not argue… "In order to thrive" we need all kinds of things, and it appears… to me anyway… that all of these needs are incompatible with the realities of our modern lives. This is probably why very few people are truly thriving. Those of us who are looking around and actually "registering" where a good majority of people are at (physically, emotionally, mentally & spiritually) can feel, instinctively, that "thriving" is almost an impossibility....and so we hang back and try to meet our own needs as best we can..decide what we can most easily love without...try to transcend our desire for more....and set our sights on "good enough". Yes this is very sad...but I think it's true
God this is so liberating to hear I feel very comforted AND like I was told the truth. This isolation this disconnection has no meaning anymore for me. I have needs and they deserve to be met!
I love this. Just Yes. Doing life alone is extremely difficult. Community, If you have needs you are needy and desperate so you turn away. Say it loud. Thank you ❤
thank you, once again, you nailed it Teal. I am working through this since childhood and it's very relieving to be acknowledged regarding my experiences made with this issue
If you can leave… I just heard a story of a woman who went to ER with a stroke and had to lie there as they lectured her about her supposed alcoholism (she is sober) and didn’t treat her for her stroke. She could not get up and leave. That is why she was in the ER.
Wow Teal thank you ❤ serendipitously, I see this afternoon I was writing about this yesterday! Specifically I commented on how our buying power has become so much worse now that we are living increasingly independent!
I also can see as one who takes time deliberately with myself to be aware of this that I am is part of something "spiritual ". Slowing down the mind and body periodically and giving attention to mind and body does actually help reset, rest and revitalize ones self. Without that humans will easily crash and burn. I've seen it kill people, my loved ones. And knowing myself, I now know it's not my trauma. I have the power to detatch from it and not force it to roll into my kids lives by being open about it. Also counselors are amazing to have. Anyway, you rock!
I feel like every word you say is like poetry. Very Poetic! I don't know if that's the intention or not, but I love it! I love your content very much! Also, you are very beautiful! Thank you for sharing your knowledge and educating us about human being. Thank you, Ms. Teal Swan!
I think the underlying problem is that people want one simple answer of either extreme independence or extreme dependence. Trying to balance both gets complicated. Yet results are best in that complexity.
That seals the deal ~ my guiding mission for the year. 2023: make it work 2024: make it work for me 2025: invite, inspire, allow others to go to work for/serve me ✨
This girl man ❤ u are sooooo right and SUCH a tremendous gift and blessing to this world universe and to us all teal. So much love appreciation and respect to u ❤ prayers 🙏🏼
Thank you very much for the video Teal! I can say from my part that i feel pretty disconnected with people lately, at work it is the distance type talk, during my free time im mostly alone, i dont understand why is this happening to me, i remember when i was a child it was so easy to talk with someone, now it s like we re hiding, or maybe it s just me that s hiding..
"The surest way to corrupt and destroy yourself, is to deny your dependency needs. The surest way to destroy another being is to deny them of their dependency needs. The surest way to destroy the fabric of human society is to deny that people have dependency needs". Teal Swan 🌎🙏😥😘
Looking forward to experience, non-physical Consciousness/Awareness expressing itself in human form, choosing exploring interdependence; a system of connectivity and health, which involves the conscious meeting of each other's dependency needs, which will create a safe human society, in which people can thrive and navigate their life here on Earth 🌎💕🕊 thank you Teal 🙏😘
The worse part of what I went through 3 years ago was the alienation I felt completly disconnected from the rest of the population. Very scary. Nobody gets out of "it" alone.
Actually, you come in alone & you leave alone. Our need for connection is part of the journey, but we will lose absolutely everyone we love as part of that journey. That's how you know the 3D "physical" world is hell.
@@richarddebono7092 "Actually, you come in alone..." Lol, I'm pretty certain your mother and father were involved in your coming into the world. Thinking that we come alone in this world just proves the point of this video how our perception can be distorted even regarding such obvious facts. Not even mentioning that your mother and father couldn't not exist without their parents etc. Therefore, looking further into history, your bare existence is based on who knows how many thousands of people.
I think it is important to let yourself be a human being with needs, but I also think that it is first and foremost important to understand who we are fundamentally so that we can have a firm anchor in our experience at the level of form as a human being. Otherwise our needs are transformed into desires and then the human being suffers incredibly, I think it is important not to think that one side excludes the other, what we humans would have needed since childhood is to learn to process emotions and energies.
The change/development in voice frequency of Teal Swan is amazing. (I just played the Boundaries versus Oneness video from 11 years ago, before listening to this most recent one.) ✌️
Thank you Teal! I depend on you and your videos (in a healthy way lol). You have such a knack for articulating these complicated concepts is such a beautifully wise and approachable way! Sending you lots of love and gratitude!
Teal, thank you so much for what you do here...A book called "A Place Where We Love To Be" might help the problem we have with sharing. Atoms exchange and share energy to keep themselves whole and balanced. We have about 30 trillion of them, right? Once we see that we feel "more" during a positve encounter together than less, I believe this experience will set the record straight. We're only afraid because we're not doing this. So, do it and see what happens...Meet everyone as if they are a part of yourself, because they are. ❤😊
The worst thing about it is .... If you are already mentally and/or physically ill you're more likely to be stepped on/treated poorly or even be completely alone because most of people simply don't see the value in you anymore. I come from that background and even building your own career while obviously something is always going on in your life is extremely hard. People don't take you serious anymore ^^
Yes, I can relate. It's a hard reality that people who have been abused can find themselves chronically in abusive patterns and relationships. People treat you how you let them treat you. And the trauma is recreated over and over again.
I 100# agree just by reading the title of this video… can’t wait to hear how closely my feelings and your feelings align on this matter. I am figuring this out just for myself in the present day so no wonder I have had one failed relationship after another and this includes platonic… thank you for the video. ❤
I'm a person that does not need romantic relationships or sex. I understand that need of food and roads and I'm grateful those things are provided. I have a few friends I deeply appreciate. The most cherished thing I crave is solitude. I do not want to come home to somebody, I want to be alone.
@ I'm almost 37. I got married at 21 and have been alone since I was 30. Horrible marriage. It's funny because there's an Astrology term called "Saturn Return" where every person from around the age of 29 and 30 has a "reset" and in my case was a collection of bad experiences that caused me to want to be alone. 7 years without a relationship and counting.
I totally agree with you Teal and I have grown to accept that I need love and connection and community around me, BUT my struggle has been codependency, especially in romantic relationships. I think that's why people run so far into hyper independence because we are all so codependent that we traumatize each other. Can you speak on this please? I'd love to hear what you have to say!
This is Rampant in the spiritual community Teal, unfortunately it'll take a while for Humanity to unravel. I've been constantly told to stop being dependent upon people or even a relationship. Thankyou for this clarification Teal ❤
A-fuckin-men. As usual, humans don’t know how to balance. Humans used to be too focused on community that they didn’t allow autonomy or independence. Then we gained more independence in parts of the world and that started to become way too much of the focus. And now there’s a coldness and expectation to be able to be entirely alone even when we know loneliness kills. We need a balance between community and independence. It’s so sad to see this struggle to simply follow our biological and spiritual needs. I don’t know how to find people like this anymore and it breaks my heart.
This is excellent perspective. It needs to come side by side with an understanding of how to relate: If I am dependent, and this is scary, and it makes me insecure, how do I relate to the systems that provide for me? How do I improve that relationship? How do I feel good about it? This is the basis of morals - if I benefit, how do I also become a benefit to the system I benefit from? Symbiotic instead of parasitic. Help each other. A sense of exchange. youre mining the rich ore GO DEEPER!
About to make an app for connections and partnerships where the focus on the app is the topic of this video. To help those of us who see the imbalances and the poison of these ways of thinking find other like-minded people in search of community, depth, emotional connection, support, and all the other things you mentioned in this video. Idk if anyone would use it but it’s a thought.
Your so awesome thanks for the video these things need to be more talked about but it's like taboo without connections with one another no matter how otherwise fruitful our lives it'll only become more empty or at least loveless some would say is the same thing
Honestly listening to this brought up feeling’s of depression, excitement, & gratitude…Teal you did it again! After many years of isolation & building a better relationship with self & most importantly the inner guidance/ intuition is stronger than ever! Great… But the need is stronger than ever … for connection & love 💙👍🪷❤️
Hello to everyone reading this. Right now, I'm inconsolable. My ex-partner left a few weeks ago, and I am heartbroken and saddened since this relationship is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Although I tried, I was unable to win him back. I don't know what to do, but I shouldn't be posting this here.
Since my 12-year relationship ended, I know how hard it is to say goodbye to someone you love. But I couldn't just let him go, so I did everything I could to win him back. I finally went to a spiritual counsellor for guidance, and he helped me win back his love.
Would you please make a video about control if you think its a good idea.I think i tend to " freeze" in this stressfull situations were i have no control and instead of going into it to make it better i just feel powerless to it.
i was at this party last weekend, and after a few drinks, i ended up on top of a table, dancing, completely naked. not something i’d normally do, but honestly, the way people were looking at me was crazy. like, they couldn’t keep their eyes off me. i wasn’t trying to do anything special, but it made me think of this book i read a while ago, Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki. not that i’m suggesting it made me take my clothes off, but the whole vibe thing… it might’ve played a part.
I am experiencing a prolonged and emotionally destructive separation and divorce.
During this, I have found myself watching lots of videos of live musical performances.
At first, I thought I was using the music to help me deal.
Later I realized that I had become fascinated by the interactions of musicians as they play.
I am not much of a musician but I have come to understand that this type of interaction is what I crave both from an intimate relationship, and with friends and colleagues.
This is not shameful to me.
I realize that in the aftermath of the destruction of my former life, that what I need, to be healthy, is healthy connections, not complete isolation brought on by hurt and fear.
This video serves as a very potent confirmation.
Thank you Teal.
Very good perspective.
The fact that you’ve realized this means you are healing. Keep going. What a brave and beautiful person you are. Gift yourself the time, space and grace you need and well deserve right now to fall back in love with yourself so that when you’re ready to love someone again they will not be able to love you any less than how you love yourself. It will not be possible because you will not let allow any less than you need and deserve and you won’t even have to try to get what you need. It will just be the standard your heart and soul has set. So, love yourself beyond all measure and the love you receive in return will be beyond measure as well. ❤
Hang in there bro.😎
@joeprimal2044
Thanks.
I appreciate it.
Hardest time in my life so far, and
I have had some Stuff before.
I'm still here.
@@rtraveller6705
Thank you.
Thank you for validating the fact that we cannot get everything from within. I needed to hear that stated out loud.
It's important to know the difference between codependence, independence, and interdependence. Interdependence is what a healthy relationship looks like. It's about believing you have value to offer and are also worthy to receive.
U kno what that's the kinda bs people don't need to here. Did u even watch the whole clip.? We all have needs in common. Why complicate things n induce suppression of emotions and needs.
@lja8534 Yes I watched it to the end. She even referred to interdependence herself. There is some nuance to the subject. I recommend just looking up those definitions and just bounce it off what she says. I'm not antagonizing, just sharing something I believe to be helpful.
@lja8534 Here’s a breakdown of codependence, independence, and interdependence in relationships:
Codependence
Definition: A dynamic where one or both partners rely excessively on the other for emotional support, validation, or a sense of identity. Boundaries are often blurred, and self-worth becomes tied to the relationship.
Characteristics:
Difficulty functioning or feeling whole without the other person.
One partner may sacrifice their own needs to maintain the relationship.
A tendency to "fix" or control the other person to maintain security.
Emotional enmeshment, where one person’s mood heavily impacts the other.
Example: Partner A constantly seeks Partner B’s approval and feels anxious or unworthy when it’s not given, while Partner B feels obligated to meet all of Partner A’s emotional needs.
Independence
Definition: A state where individuals prioritize their autonomy, personal goals, and self-sufficiency, often to the point of minimizing reliance on the relationship.
Characteristics:
Clear boundaries and strong individual identity.
A reluctance to depend on or share vulnerability with the partner.
Emphasis on "me" over "we," sometimes at the expense of intimacy.
Can lead to isolation or emotional distance if taken to extremes.
Example: Partner A focuses on their career and personal growth but avoids opening up emotionally to Partner B, keeping the relationship surface-level.
Interdependence
Definition: A healthy balance between connection and autonomy, where partners maintain their individuality while mutually supporting each other’s growth and well-being.
Characteristics:
Clear boundaries with mutual respect for individuality.
Emotional support without losing one’s sense of self.
Collaboration and shared goals while maintaining personal aspirations.
Both partners feel empowered to give and receive freely.
Example: Partner A and Partner B share emotional vulnerability, support each other’s dreams, and also pursue individual interests, creating a sense of mutual fulfillment and trust.
Key Differences:
Codependence: Over-reliance and enmeshment.
Independence: Emphasis on self-sufficiency, often to the detriment of intimacy.
Interdependence: A balanced approach that honors both individuality and partnership.
In essence, interdependence represents the healthiest dynamic, where both partners contribute to a relationship that fosters growth, trust, and mutual respect without sacrificing personal identity.
@@lja8534i think her words can be also mistaken for excuse for bottomless pit type of people who drain others to death but don't offer anything themselves.
Don't confuse them with people who can give something back and aren't just leaching and asking for excuses or wanting to be one sided nursing agent for others.
Unfortunatelly most people are not aware of this. Thank you Teal for everything you do, you are a true gift to the world! ❤
most if not all things she talks about are things people are unaware of, she made it her buisness
Share this with people.
@ my dog didnt care :
most people are aware of this. we're just opressed by hypercapitalism. trust me we all know. we just can't do anything about it.
I disagree. Most of us know this but we cannot change the society in which we exist.
I always had a very small family and was raised by a single mother. The pain of loneliness can be very deep. I wish to experience genuine connection and belonging 💔💛
It's the worst kind of pain 😔
Omg same love, I hope this information will help us to seek that very aspect out so we can come to meet our dependency needs❤
❤@@hanavaughan6956
@@hanavaughan6956hey! Let's be family and choose each other! 💝 🫂
@@hanavaughan6956 ❤️
Hearing this from someone that’s an example to me, confirmed the very things I always felt when being in the spiritual field. I never felt at home. Knowing and feeling the needs summed up in the video where never met, I feel like a ghost. I see why I never thrive, no matter how many spiritual practices I do. I feel hollow, and the very thing that scares me the most are humans, yet I crave the needs a lot. I used to say I choose this, from a souls perspective, and I gaslighted myself everything with it. I’m human, and I have human needs. I knew it all a long, now I knew I was right
Right. I've acknowledged this truth for decades, while living my entire incarnation with most of my needs unmet. Most if not all humans I've loved and do love, seem to not show mutual desire to meet my needs while I help them meet theirs. I move away from people who don't respect my needs and goals, seek to meet new people who may have a shared mutual desire, while also giving generously when I can as much as I can without erasing my own efforts and time required to "fill my own cup"and respect myself. Life continues on and I still don't have friends, a partner, a family that desire to collaborate and share lives together as designed.
Agreed. What galls me is the hypocrisy of every women I have ever met who weaponize every manner of social, relational, emotional need to their own advantage (resource extraction) and then will use their abundant sexuality as a predatory way to extract power. Given this, and all manner of double standards, social, legal, and otherwise, of course most men are very afraid of monogamy, dependence, marriage, commitment, and all manner of collective action abuse. Most men are seriously traumatized, and no help and support is available to them at all, from any quarter -- even other men. Only some men (and nearly no women at all) have loyalty, honor commitments, and maintain responsibility to agreements to provide, whereas women, if any even temporary feeling suggests otherwise, will quickly discard any and all responsibilities to anyone else at all. From there, I see no generosity, only expectation of princess treatment and entitlement.
So anything you give as help another with their emotional or relational needs is immediately taken for granted by them, with zero to none reciprocity, and abundant entitlement, if you are a man giving to a woman, and hence, when you are discovering such lopsidedness, elect very reasonably and rationally, to pull back, you end up with (necessary) distance -- which just means that you are even more alone. Hence the cycle continues. More necessary isolationism. Modernism sucks.
Some people have huge capacity and some have none. How can we ever balance this without turning into each other? I think she is missing something here, i have listened to her repeating this for years.
I am in the same situation like you described and have completely gone hermit mode after the realisation that people use me as a free general resource and when the time comes to return the favor they reveal they have nothing to give or are not being able.
How can we move on from being focused on people who have nothing to give? Because i am tired of small souls. It's not anymore my job to feed indefinitely hungry people.
I hear you both, in the same boat unfortunately. I can't tell if refusing to settle is necessary to finding the right relationships or if settling is actually required in all relationships...
So confused 😂
@@atlasiroh5095i have been wondering the exact same question. No answer yet
🎉 totally agree feeling that 💯
Having come away from a relationship with a so-called 'spiritually enlightened' partner, I'm really enjoying Teal's videos ripping on the spiritual ideology and persona. Everything she said in this video sums up what I tried to brainwash myself into believing whilst in that relationship - that I was 'needy' for having needs, and should be able to provide myself with every single need I have. That to depend upon another was simply a character weakness.
Which is why I only date ladies who've done prison time. Spiritual partners are too much work.Keep it simple. Shanks and ramen noodles😂
Another take: I got to look at modern relationships through the eyes of a 22yo single mom who survived an abusive relationship with her child's father. I looked into her eyes as she became extremely vulnerable, and said, "I fear I will not be able to trust another person for the rest of my life." These traumatizing experiences individuals have faced are killing relationships that could be healthy dependencies.
My friend was just left with 3 young children when her partner of 15 years decided he wanted a younger subordinate at work. He got to walk away FREE, falling into the comfort of a codependent relationship, she has to deal with the rude awakening of instantaneously becoming a single mom overnight. They could barely survive on two incomes. How is she supposed to sustain on ONE!? How is she ever supposed to trust someone again, let alone trust someone with her children!? 💔
@@stellaallbright4750 When you consider your friend's adversity she's about to face it's bad, but with a good support network it's doable. She needs those she can depend on to rally around her. It's your last line that is the real problem, in my eyes, and one that is tying my stomach into knots. The 22yo, soon to be 24yo, woman in my comment has fallen hard for a fellow. A fellow that they met seven weeks ago. I hear he has a lot of money and loves to spend it lavishly on this woman. (btw, I've seen some photos and videos of this dude, and he is nice looking and well built. I can see why she's smitten.) I realize that it's my overactive imagination that is causing my gut pain. I'm just afraid she'll be blinded by the sense of security he provides and not properly vet this dude before introducing him to her child. And since I use to work at CPS, my imagination is being fueled by the numerous stories I've heard.
@@stellaallbright4750 And about her life-partner getting a free pass, that should never happen. I've heard that divorce courts will award the woman with at least half their partners assets, and maybe more, since she has the children.
@@stellaallbright4750 Have you heard the expression, "Pumped and dumped?" Based off of several Tik Tok videos that I've seen, there seems to be a segment of that male population that target vulnerable women in your friend's situation.
Growing up, "home" wasn't emotionally safe, and I was bullied as a young child as well. I relate to this video a lot. It's not as if I strive for independence, or don't recognize the fact that independence is an illusion. But I still fear depending on others (too much). I have friends and brothers I can (and do, to an extent) depend on. But I am very cautious about it. The difference, to me, is that being "overly" dependent increases the chance for me to experience intense/active pain inflicted on me by others, whereas unfulfilled dependency is a gentler/passive pain I've learned to endure. I think many people find it difficult to find people who they can trust to truly depend on, and even when finding such people, we learn not to overburden them. We are all born ignorant, many of us start out being overly trusting, which leads to relational trauma, which leads to us reducing our desire for and trust in dependency.
Ultimately, the root of the problem lies in the nature of dependence itself. It is not a problem we can solve ourselves. You can't MAKE yourself feel safe getting close to others, or opening up to others. It is an environmental factor others have to create for us which we can then embrace. If we try to force it, disappointment/re-traumatization becomes inevitable. You can't breathe underwater, and you can't feel safe when you aren't. And even people who mean well aren't unconditionally safe. So it's a balancing act. How close can I get, how open can I be, without drastically increasing the chances of getting hurt? And when I do choose to (actively) depend on others, it is preceded by my acceptance of the possibility that the floor might vanish from under me.
Thank you so much for making this video 🙏 I have been saying for years now (without being heard or agreed with) that this myth in the spiritual community that’s been repeated over and over like an anthem that “I need to be 💯 self reliant and capable of making myself FULLY HAPPY ALONE WITHOUT NEEDING ANYONE before I will find love or my tribe” is DAMAGING and has felt impossible! I’ve always said it’s human nature to need people and no ones “vibration” is perfect and who can be truly happy alone? I’ve said it was a farce and an unfair expectation and been told that I’m just codependent so I don’t understand.
This is vindicating. 🙏
Much appreciated 👍😊
I've been told that "you have to be happy alone before being happy with someone else" thing so many times. 😒
The funny thing is that everyone that's said this is to me is in a unhappy relationship.
@@Tim_G_BennettI've heard this so many times and it felt wrong and hurt me. It feels like being made fun of when people who tell you these things, have families and probably can't even remember to come home to an empty apartment.
I used to believe them... Now I think that they can f*** off.
Now I know that people heal in relationships not when meditating and doing yoga all alone and lonely in their stupid little apartments.
I used to think success was all about working harder. Then I read The Secret Doctrine of Wealth, and it completely shifted my mindset. It’s amazing how much clarity can come from the right book.
God bless you for this share
Bot
I don't mind dependency. I looked for, and look to others, but I HATE to be controlled. I hate to be hurt, and backstabbed. Show me a person alive that I can trust with myself, and I'll show you my willingness to be dependent.
Wow... exactly my thoughts and beliefs... Incredibile.
No one will show us a person we can trust. This is why relational literacy and boundaries are our everything, my friend.
@@vlst8715 Yes, and "when relational literacy and boundaries" best practices fail us, we grieve the years of loss doing our due diligences only to find another failed attempt at leading our best life.
@@vlst8715 Dark is the human soul, and hidden are the things that no one can know before they are shown.
Don't you mean "independent" in your last sentence??
Finally, someone said it. Thank you!
Thank you.
One of the things I realized in the most painful days is that even the most “independent” humans are highly dependent on one humans for things like food, clothing, gadgets, etc.
Any time I brought this up to others, 90% of them said that they get everything “from within” and got mad.
Those are also the only things I need. However, I don't want other people getting to close to me.
People get upset when you confront them with lies they tell themselves.
Thank you, Teal. I was aware that I was neglected and starving from needs being met, yet only yesterday I realized how much I've started to obsessively try to meet them myself - and definitely with that destroying myself. Over and over I tried so hard to self soothe, calm down, feel into my feelings of fear and anxiety as well, yet it felt difficult to me and often frustrating, leaving me with a fear that I couldn't regulate, even when I'm 17 "already". I noticed that I never learned how to even self soothed and there was not much or any co-regulation in my childhood. I'm now trying to really accept that I need someone, specifically someone through whom I can experience the co-regulation that has been missing and let that be the base that hasn't been there before, to actually feel more stable and be able to learn regulation myself - in a healthy way, without letting those dependency needs be unmet or fighting them, through which I will honestly never find true regulation either, right? Acknowledging it feels good, but honestly so f*ing crappy too. Admitting that I want someone that takes my hand and that is fine with going in the pace that is okay with me, being there, listening and helping me to regulate, without shaming me for not being able to yet. Someone that is there the way I needed it, to develop healthy instead of crippled.
I must sound more optimistic or positive than I actually am about it, but maybe expressing it and sharing it makes me feel lighter and hearing about how someone else might relate to this🤎
(ps I already looked for therapists)
I agree, a sense of community, requires both dependency and interdependency with individuals in the group and the group as a whole. Alot of indigenous cultures foundations are built on this.
Had to come back to write another comment. This video has been MASSIVE to me. Wow. It's made me realise why I've always felt a bit uncomfortable with people who adamantly insist that being single/having no friends/doing their own thing is what's right for them - that they have everything they need in themselves. Because this goes against our innate wiring. Why do humans enjoy love stories? Because we see harmony being restored. Why does grief hurt so much when we lose someone? Because of the loss of our own. Why do people care so much what others think? Because we fear being alienated from our clan. All these are signs that prove what Teal is saying here. These aren't just little 'annoyances'... they stem from a much deeper place. Clearly a need.
If you wiped the planet of humans and anything humans had ever made, then put one human back on the planet, how long do you reckon they would live for?
2:40 - 3:23 Wow that's a lot of dependency needs.... I probably only experienced like 5 of them.
I remember one time my neighbor father passed away and she came to my door to tell me. At one point I had reached my arm behind her and gave her pat/rub, a soothing gesture. And in that moment I felt something powerful I never felt before. I dunno what it was, but trying to connect with her and listen to her so intimately just sparked something in me I never felt before. I've helped out others many times and been there for them so I'm not sure why I felt that.
4:40 - 4:52 What if life shows that nobody really wants to be apart of your dependency needs? What are you supposed to do?
First it was my parents, then people in general who don't like the real me. Probably explains why I avoid performative work like the plague.
4:55 - 5:12 I went into independence as much as I can because I couldn't get my dependency needs met in a healthy manner from those around me. Fortunately, I never believed such things... I am aware that I'm not supposed to meet my dependency needs on my own.
thats the thing, were men. we SHOULD have people to emotionally lean on and/or meet our needs. but people want us to fulfill THEIR needs. and dont think about the other way around.
people are like hungry wild dogs. they see you, they see "meat" , not a companion
took me years to realize people are just good-looking-animals. (REALLY good looking, but still lol lmao)
look up joe rogans chimpanzee story. its the RXACT same as human behavior, accept were less hairy
Yes....thank you for specifically stating the "In order to".... Namely, to "thrive"on a physical, emotional mental and even spiritual level".
Something I've noticed in myself is that I will often say "I don't need such and such"... But I'm not even considering the idea of "thriving" when I say it. I'm usually coming from a place of "surviving", given all of the facts of life that I perceive as almost unavoidable in today's world. For me it's about feeling I have "accepted" the realities of which needs others are and are not likely "capable" of providing…and then consciouly "choosing" what I can most easily live without.
So, the way you've stated it, I would not argue… "In order to thrive" we need all kinds of things, and it appears… to me anyway… that all of these needs are incompatible with the realities of our modern lives. This is probably why very few people are truly thriving. Those of us who are looking around and actually "registering" where a good majority of people are at (physically, emotionally, mentally & spiritually) can feel, instinctively, that "thriving" is almost an impossibility....and so we hang back and try to meet our own needs as best we can..decide what we can most easily love without...try to transcend our desire for more....and set our sights on "good enough".
Yes this is very sad...but I think it's true
God this is so liberating to hear I feel very comforted AND like I was told the truth. This isolation this disconnection has no meaning anymore for me. I have needs and they deserve to be met!
You are the best ! Clarity and honesty are your talents.
Thanks for reminding me of all the things I have given up on because apparently I was wrong to even have needs. Of course who am I to need something.
I love this. Just Yes. Doing life alone is extremely difficult. Community, If you have needs you are needy and desperate so you turn away. Say it loud. Thank you ❤
This just validated a part of me that even i myself was not ready to validate
The timing is so damn perfect...needed this the most
I was thinking about this today. Teal is an amazing teacher and her way to explain our reality is a gift.
🎁💝🎁 YES 🙌🎉
thank you, once again, you nailed it Teal. I am working through this since childhood and it's very relieving to be acknowledged regarding my experiences made with this issue
I swear if I hear self sufficiency one more time from a healthcare professional I will .. leave. Because I can control myself.
If you can leave… I just heard a story of a woman who went to ER with a stroke and had to lie there as they lectured her about her supposed alcoholism (she is sober) and didn’t treat her for her stroke. She could not get up and leave. That is why she was in the ER.
Wow Teal thank you ❤ serendipitously, I see this afternoon I was writing about this yesterday!
Specifically I commented on how our buying power has become so much worse now that we are living increasingly independent!
I also can see as one who takes time deliberately with myself to be aware of this that I am is part of something "spiritual ". Slowing down the mind and body periodically and giving attention to mind and body does actually help reset, rest and revitalize ones self. Without that humans will easily crash and burn. I've seen it kill people, my loved ones. And knowing myself, I now know it's not my trauma. I have the power to detatch from it and not force it to roll into my kids lives by being open about it. Also counselors are amazing to have. Anyway, you rock!
हे अहं भारतस्य अस्मि। अहं च भवतः महत् प्रशंसकः अस्मि भवतः महत् कार्यं भवति। ❤❤❤
I feel like every word you say is like poetry. Very Poetic! I don't know if that's the intention or not, but I love it! I love your content very much! Also, you are very beautiful! Thank you for sharing your knowledge and educating us about human being. Thank you, Ms. Teal Swan!
I think the underlying problem is that people want one simple answer of either extreme independence or extreme dependence. Trying to balance both gets complicated. Yet results are best in that complexity.
That seals the deal ~ my guiding mission for the year.
2023: make it work
2024: make it work for me
2025: invite, inspire, allow others to go to work for/serve me ✨
Great distinctions on: dependent, independent and co-dependency
Thank you everyone who helped bring this forth
Before I go, I wanted to thank you, too. So thank you, Teal.
Yes! When I embraced my needs, my life changed
I'm glad Teal put out this video. Helps bring back a humane world...
Thank you Teal, this truth is so freeing! My hope is that everyone who needs this will watch this video 💫
This girl man ❤ u are sooooo right and SUCH a tremendous gift and blessing to this world universe and to us all teal. So much love appreciation and respect to u ❤ prayers 🙏🏼
Thank you so much Teal, this is so important!!! ❤
Many blessings to you, Teal Swan! ❤
Thank you very much for the video Teal! I can say from my part that i feel pretty disconnected with people lately, at work it is the distance type talk, during my free time im mostly alone, i dont understand why is this happening to me, i remember when i was a child it was so easy to talk with someone, now it s like we re hiding, or maybe it s just me that s hiding..
Wow Teal, your timing is perfect. Thank you 🙏💖🥰
Great timing!
"The surest way to corrupt and destroy yourself, is to deny your dependency needs. The surest way to destroy another being is to deny them of their dependency needs. The surest way to destroy the fabric of human society is to deny that people have dependency needs". Teal Swan 🌎🙏😥😘
Thank you teal ❤ just what i need to hear again. I really thankful to have found you 🙏
Looking forward to experience, non-physical Consciousness/Awareness expressing itself in human form, choosing exploring interdependence; a system of connectivity and health, which involves the conscious meeting of each other's dependency needs, which will create a safe human society, in which people can thrive and navigate their life here on Earth 🌎💕🕊 thank you Teal 🙏😘
The worse part of what I went through 3 years ago was the alienation I felt completly disconnected from the rest of the population. Very scary.
Nobody gets out of "it" alone.
Actually, you come in alone & you leave alone. Our need for connection is part of the journey, but we will lose absolutely everyone we love as part of that journey. That's how you know the 3D "physical" world is hell.
@@richarddebono7092 "Actually, you come in alone..."
Lol, I'm pretty certain your mother and father were involved in your coming into the world.
Thinking that we come alone in this world just proves the point of this video how our perception can be distorted even regarding such obvious facts.
Not even mentioning that your mother and father couldn't not exist without their parents etc.
Therefore, looking further into history, your bare existence is based on who knows how many thousands of people.
Bless your beautiful soul for addressing this important element and in such a clear & direct way. Much appreciated, as always 🙏❤😇
I think it is important to let yourself be a human being with needs, but I also think that it is first and foremost important to understand who we are fundamentally so that we can have a firm anchor in our experience at the level of form as a human being. Otherwise our needs are transformed into desires and then the human being suffers incredibly, I think it is important not to think that one side excludes the other, what we humans would have needed since childhood is to learn to process emotions and energies.
We are all connected and that is magnificent!
The change/development in voice frequency of Teal Swan is amazing. (I just played the Boundaries versus Oneness video from 11 years ago, before listening to this most recent one.)
✌️
Thank you angel. God bless all who visit your channel. 🙏❤️🕯️😇🕯️❤️🙏
Thank you Teal! I depend on you and your videos (in a healthy way lol). You have such a knack for articulating these complicated concepts is such a beautifully wise and approachable way! Sending you lots of love and gratitude!
Have a good week 🙏
Teal, thank you so much for what you do here...A book called "A Place Where We Love To Be" might help the problem we have with sharing. Atoms exchange and share energy to keep themselves whole and balanced. We have about 30 trillion of them, right? Once we see that we feel "more" during a positve encounter together than less, I believe this experience will set the record straight. We're only afraid because we're not doing this. So, do it and see what happens...Meet everyone as if they are a part of yourself, because they are. ❤😊
The key is to focus on attracting people who WANT to meet those needs in us.
The worst thing about it is .... If you are already mentally and/or physically ill you're more likely to be stepped on/treated poorly or even be completely alone because most of people simply don't see the value in you anymore.
I come from that background and even building your own career while obviously something is always going on in your life is extremely hard. People don't take you serious anymore ^^
If they don’t take you serious you are not obligated to take ~them~ serious as well ⭐ Something I found out the hard way 💛
you are low functioning because of illness and it is a self perpetuating cycle...me too...sucks!
2 new movies address this issue. Patrice on Hulu & Take a Look at this Heart ❤️ on Roku & Kanopy
@@AndTheStarsShallFallFromHeaventhe problem is that, those who are ill have less room for not having their dependency needs met.
Yes, I can relate. It's a hard reality that people who have been abused can find themselves chronically in abusive patterns and relationships. People treat you how you let them treat you. And the trauma is recreated over and over again.
I 100# agree just by reading the title of this video… can’t wait to hear how closely my feelings and your feelings align on this matter. I am figuring this out just for myself in the present day so no wonder I have had one failed relationship after another and this includes platonic… thank you for the video. ❤
Thankyou Teal❤
Really liked this video, made me think. Thank you Teal.
as always Teal: thank you ❤
Well spoken! Thanks.
Today I went out for huggs, I needed that, and did get some👏👏👏👏for addressing this subject, totally agree.
You're so wise...You never disappoint Teal.
Thank you Teal ❤
Yes! Thank you so much for sharing!
The universe is an interdependent place. That's wild. I only took it as far as the planet. Thanks teal❤
I'm a person that does not need romantic relationships or sex. I understand that need of food and roads and I'm grateful those things are provided. I have a few friends I deeply appreciate. The most cherished thing I crave is solitude. I do not want to come home to somebody, I want to be alone.
Yes, the peace is powerful
Can I ask you how long you have been alone and how old you are. I used to feel like you but with time I feel like falling apart alone.
@ I'm almost 37. I got married at 21 and have been alone since I was 30. Horrible marriage. It's funny because there's an Astrology term called "Saturn Return" where every person from around the age of 29 and 30 has a "reset" and in my case was a collection of bad experiences that caused me to want to be alone. 7 years without a relationship and counting.
Amazing Motivation ❤
Have a beautiful day Teal.
I totally agree with you Teal and I have grown to accept that I need love and connection and community around me, BUT my struggle has been codependency, especially in romantic relationships. I think that's why people run so far into hyper independence because we are all so codependent that we traumatize each other. Can you speak on this please? I'd love to hear what you have to say!
Great timing again, excellent conversation and reality of what is.
Many starving people at the emotional spiritual phycological etc etc.
Cheers
This is Rampant in the spiritual community Teal, unfortunately it'll take a while for Humanity to unravel.
I've been constantly told to stop being dependent upon people or even a relationship.
Thankyou for this clarification Teal ❤
I'm just sending everyone , LOVE and PEACE 😇😍💗💚💙🩵
Murderpedos thank you especially, they don't get enough of that.
I love you for talking about this thank you! ❤
Thank you so much for speaking the truth ❤
Thank you Teal 👍🙏
A-fuckin-men. As usual, humans don’t know how to balance. Humans used to be too focused on community that they didn’t allow autonomy or independence. Then we gained more independence in parts of the world and that started to become way too much of the focus. And now there’s a coldness and expectation to be able to be entirely alone even when we know loneliness kills. We need a balance between community and independence. It’s so sad to see this struggle to simply follow our biological and spiritual needs. I don’t know how to find people like this anymore and it breaks my heart.
Thank you Teal
Some people prioritize their success or spiritual growth way above saving their relationship. This makes their relationships very vulnerable.
Again Teal, you never cease to amaze me God bless you❤
This is excellent perspective. It needs to come side by side with an understanding of how to relate:
If I am dependent, and this is scary, and it makes me insecure, how do I relate to the systems that provide for me? How do I improve that relationship? How do I feel good about it?
This is the basis of morals - if I benefit, how do I also become a benefit to the system I benefit from? Symbiotic instead of parasitic. Help each other. A sense of exchange.
youre mining the rich ore
GO DEEPER!
About to make an app for connections and partnerships where the focus on the app is the topic of this video. To help those of us who see the imbalances and the poison of these ways of thinking find other like-minded people in search of community, depth, emotional connection, support, and all the other things you mentioned in this video. Idk if anyone would use it but it’s a thought.
Ty Teal .much needed ❤🎉
I am beginning to accept this ❤❤❤
Your so awesome thanks for the video these things need to be more talked about but it's like taboo without connections with one another no matter how otherwise fruitful our lives it'll only become more empty or at least loveless some would say is the same thing
Thank you.
Honestly listening to this brought up feeling’s of depression, excitement, & gratitude…Teal you did it again!
After many years of isolation & building a better relationship with self & most importantly the inner guidance/ intuition is stronger than ever! Great…
But the need is stronger than ever … for connection & love 💙👍🪷❤️
Thank you for this 💖🙏🏼
Hello to everyone reading this. Right now, I'm inconsolable. My ex-partner left a few weeks ago, and I am heartbroken and saddened since this relationship is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Although I tried, I was unable to win him back. I don't know what to do, but I shouldn't be posting this here.
Since my 12-year relationship ended, I know how hard it is to say goodbye to someone you love. But I couldn't just let him go, so I did everything I could to win him back. I finally went to a spiritual counsellor for guidance, and he helped me win back his love.
It's fascinating! How did you locate a spiritual counsellor and how can I get in touch with one most effectively?
Father Obah Eze is a wonderful spiritual counselor who has the ability to bring back your ex.
He can assist you; he is Father Obah Eze, and he possesses immense powers and he’s the best spell caster to ever live
Thank you for sharing this valuable insight. I just looked father obah eze up, and I'm genuinely impressed.
The shade of your lipstick looks soooo good on you 👍🏻
Funny. I was thinking of this exact thing, though could never articulate it this well. Bravo! Well spoken!
Would you please make a video about control if you think its a good idea.I think i tend to " freeze" in this stressfull situations were i have no control and instead of going into it to make it better i just feel powerless to it.
Add tickles to the list. Almost impossible to tickle ourselves. We need others.
Best comment award
Thank you for your thoughts.
i was at this party last weekend, and after a few drinks, i ended up on top of a table, dancing, completely naked. not something i’d normally do, but honestly, the way people were looking at me was crazy. like, they couldn’t keep their eyes off me. i wasn’t trying to do anything special, but it made me think of this book i read a while ago, Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki. not that i’m suggesting it made me take my clothes off, but the whole vibe thing… it might’ve played a part.
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Brilliant woman ! ❤ thank you 🙏