Hey man one of the saddest things that just happened is i watched my gf go from a high quality woman to a low quality party lifestyle girl, all her friends party every weekend and drink, do weed and tons of stuff. i didnt want my girl going to those kinds of places because well im against that kinda stuff, the first party i let her go to to show i trusted her she promised not to drink or anything (she isnt even old enough to drink) but she broke my trust, ended up super drunk with puke all over herself 😂 all to fit in with those shitty friends and she wont even listen to me or her parents. last week we got into a fight and she broke up with me after.. every day she has been starting off sending me how much she loves me and stuff and wants to "give me a second chance" and then goes on about all the things i need to improve about myself and chance. when i tell her what she needs to change she goes all mad and blocks me just to start again the next day with "i miss you, i love you" today i found her on tinder too which she isnt old enough for either. she tells me i need to grow up and mature when im a year older and she is the one acting like a child. (im 18) i hate her friends for what they have done to her but honestly what can i say. her loss tbh. shes gonna find out sooner than later that i was a great guy compared to the guys she gonna attract now who will probably just use her for her body. the last thing she said was that we could be friends. then i knew i was done with her and blocked her tbh. she is so obsessed with me and yet cant sacrifice her shitty partying with her shitty friends for me😂 BUT she doesnt want to lose me either 😂😂 loved her so much so this is really breaking my heart honestly but i know im worth more than what she is degrading to now by ruining her own life
I have this theory. The dumper feels satisfied and at peace in the beginning but afterwards, starts to feel the pain and the missing. The dumpee feels the pain initially but later on feels at peace.
Well said 🤔💯🏆 I was the dumpee with my ex-gf of 5 years. Unfortunately, immature women get bored, play mental gymnastics and have no clue what they want. The masculine energy must be a compassionate leader to guide the feminine. And out of curiosity and familiarity, they always come back. Especially if you're doing greater in life for yourself (Fitness, Finance, Family). Consequently, the ball is in your court as a dumpee. It is a choice to go back and work things out, and see if the work you put into yourself planned out. Or if there are other parts of your inner wounds that must be fixed. The best teachers in life will be your hardest relationships. Focus on YOUrself 💪🤍☕
@@DSILVAjeiy I'm exactly in this position at the moment. She says I should move on after a year. Wishes me happy birthday "to the best human I have ever known" Then she tells misses our friendship and wants to catch up, just to tell me that she has been thinking about me all day on the day after. Told her I need to think and see how I feel about the catching up thing. Not sure what to think about it all tbh Edit 6 Months after: I was contacted again, but I rejected the offer to talk and cut off all ties, because everything has been said already. I feel much better now and I am creating something new for myself.
For all the exes... When an ex distances u ....they actually are teaching u to learn to live without them.... So by the time the ex decides to comebk...we already have learnt to live without them
Yes, my ex was dumb enough to relocate me at my parents house but it backfired cause I started no contact and I was super clear that I don't give 2 f's if he wants to stay friends or wants to be in contact so he can take comfort in me AFTER dumping me 😂😂 he's REALLY starting to feel it now after 40 days no contact
Yass! It’s been good to ruminate my emotions with God and leaning on Him for strength. I now feel like God’s Princess vs. someone else’s validation. Been less than 2 weeks and he reached out today. It was satisfying but I’m more hung up on God than him.
My ex from 4 years ago recently reached out to me and told me he still loved me. He dumped me by text 4 years ago. Now, at the time I was very in love with this man, and it was devastating. I’ve moved on now, and I am living with someone and have a baby now. Still, he told me that he tried to find someone else and couldn’t. That he’s thought about me for the past few years. That he regrets everything and wishes he could go back and change the decisions he made. Makes me sad but I’ve moved on now, and I made my own beautiful family ❤
Im definitely going through it right now..crying myself to sleep talking to God and waking up crying im in so much pain..my mom told me its gone hit him like a ton of bricks once he realize how he treated me
Never give up..pray hope and don't worry...Put your hope and faith in God..Sometimes you needed this to get closer to God!They always regret it trust me ....
It will. I’ve been there. It may take years but they do realize. I had an ex, happily remarried, reach out to me fifteen years later to apologize for treating me poorly and it would always be a regret. He made it clear he loved his wife but wanted me to know he was the one who messed it up and he hoped I was living a wonderful life because I deserved it. Take time for yourself and lean on God.
Funny thing is ,I wanted him back so bad ,but I decided to choose myself and go no contact ..after sometime he came back but I realized I don't even want them anymore and am happy where I am now,healed, peaceful and moving on to better thing's..
This is the thing. After you get over the initial shock of a breakup you start seeing more clearly their flaws. By time they reach out and they always do, it's far too late.
6 months ago, I split with the girl I thought would be my wife one day. Initially, I felt depressed and hopeless, but now? I wouldn’t even think about taking her back. Keep your heads up. It does get better
Hey man. My girlfriend who I was friends with before dumped me out of the blue (in my head at least) over text. She said things like 'i just need to be by myself" etc, 2 weeks later she's on tinder. Man it hurts, can't wait to be over this shit
@@YouOnlyGetToDoItOnceyou deserve better brother Why waste your thoughts on her. Consider yourself saved from the real chaos and heartbreak. Instead you'll find someone who will deserve every bit of your love and you'll be happy once again.
Sometimes it gets better, but not always. Sometimes it just keeps getting worse and worse until finally, you stop trying because whenever you do, it just brings pain. If I have to choose between doing nothing and being at a constant 6-7 on the pain scale, or trying and guaranteeing a 10, I'll do nothing every time.
This feeling is so weird. I miss him everyday (its been a month now), but i don't want him back just yet. I feel like i need some time by myself to put my life in order before we ever try again. Still, it hurts so bad and i miss him so much... its a confusing difficult moment
I divorced my ex. I don’t regret one second. I would rather be alone the rest of my life than to be with her. I had enough of the gaslighting and disrespect.
Amen, don’t let anyone devalue or take you for granted. If your ex decides to dump you, find a better partner. Know that you are valuable and that you are number one, not your ex. They don’t get to decide anything about your life now. Do not let them ruin you, they don’t deserve your time, attention or love. Stay strong fellow dumpees you will be on top of your game again soon.
Never cry for someone who cheated on you because they will pay in full. 3 months ago I was abandoned by the woman I took care of for 13 years. He explained to me that he can't control his feelings after which he sent me the picture of that individual who was not able to pay the transportation costs of her going to him. On 24.03.2023 she wrote to me that she can't live without me and to go after her. How could anyone forgive such betrayal???? Be patient, time solves everything, even if it's very difficult
I'm right there with you. I trusted her so much and she knew my history of betrayal and heartbreak. Then one day she left me out of the blue for another guy in exactly the same way I'd been hurt before. She even invited him out with us because he was "just a friend", even though she'd already developed feelings for him. I watched as she slowly switched her attention from me to him until by the end of the night, I didn't exist to her. I never thought she could hurt me that much, that intentionally.
Well atleast u weren’t left when u found out u had cancer and were pregnant with their child after they said for multiple months before then they wanted to spend their life with u
The truth is, this happens every day and we all go through same at some stage in life - either societal, friends, family , church rejections etc. But developing a mindset that rejection is a redirection and change is constant will help cushion any pain, for all things work for our good - Romans 8: 28. Bible examples are likes of Joseph, David , Daniel etc. - they were rejected but at the end was worthwhile. However it is key to develop self love and protect your worth. Stay blessed.
she set me FREE 5 mos ago after 17 mos. She is Bipolar & I believe a Narcissist. I wrote a journal, I give myself PEP talks a few x's a day in the mirror. I go over that journal. I tell myself how Awesome I am. I'm doing things on my own, seeing friends. NO DATING!! NOT READY!! I'm working thru this Trauma Bond. Her Mom told her He's a Keeper. Her 26 yr old dau said I know he treats you like a Queen. She LOST!! 2023 NARC FREE!!
He may regret it, but I'm gone never to return. Lord just keep him away from me. I forgive him but never ever again want him near me. I bless him in Jesus name, I wish him the best.
The statement about joining in forgetting self is deep. Once one remembers who s/he is that's when the power comes to stand up and walk away from what no longer servers/uplifts us. Thank you for this!
I know I’ve commented on some of your previous videos but to all the people that are watching your videos this guy is right on. It is best to go in no contact because most of the time your ex doesn’t have they’re good or right intentions for you most of the time they haveproblems of their own that they need to resolve and they just have hurt you instead of resolving their problems, but this guy is a man I enjoy listening to him appreciate for all your content
Your story brought tears to my eyes!! We all need a reminder of how valuable we truly are. I’m feeling better every day even though it seems like sadness is forever... I know it will pass. Blessings
6 months gone for me. The love of my life. I adored her now she's living with someone doing the things we used to. I miss her so much. I needed that motivation coach Blac. Thank you. I will stay in NC - for good if need be. She knows what she lost and she will one day want it back. Will she get it ? Dunno. But she'd better hurry as I am a faithful and loyal bloke ready to move on. I will not treat any future partner the way she has treated me.
I started reading letting go at your recommendation and it's such a good read. It's weird how I try to avoid the painful emotions and how that subsequently prolongs the pain. However when I try to just feel the pain and allow it to tell me what it needs to tell me I still battle with my conscious mind taking over and not wanting me to accept the reality that I don't want. It's so tough realizing that if I don't learn to accept and be ok with things that I am preventing a reality of things getting better or any possibility of reconsiliation.
Don't try to reconnect with him or her I tried he was so mean he even post online that I'm annoying and some stuff that wasn't cool just don't go back. Lady's forget him now I know your heart deserves better.
I got broken up with a year ago and i have peace now. Theyve contacted me only two times with no true intentions and ive kept my boundaries and distance. It will get better ❤
I am hurting so much right now. I watch your videos to help me when I am feeling so weak and want to break no contact. This helps me get through these moments. I hope this works and he gets through whatever he needs to and realizes and comes back.
I totally understand you, because I felt that way at the beginning of my no contact. This terrible feeling will fade with the passing of days. I'm currently on day 41 and feeling stronger each day. Let your ex miss you. DO NOT break no contact, please!! You deserve to be missed and valued. Give this person the gift of your absence. He is not above you, he's not a king. Just a regular person. I'm sure he has faults, right? Breathe, meditate and trust the process . Everything is going to be all right!
@@almaalexandragarcia2704 The hardest part is when he reaches out to ask me questions he has answers to. I will politely answer and stop contact again. It hurts every time.
Thank you, I needed to hear that. This is day 2 of no contact with her and I have been depressed. My goal is to go 30 days continue to build myself up with workout and self inprovement and let go and see what happens.
Brother it does get better. Believe me. I'm 6 weeks into No Contact after spending the first 2 weeks in hell. Yeah I was panicked. I sent a few texts and called a few times those 2 weeks. Not one reply. Not once did she answer the phone but I got through it and you will too. Go no contact on her. It'll help you so much. It's hard at first but you can do it. Your self worth is more important than chasing and begging someone who doesn't want to be with you. At least not right now. You'll have time to work on yourself and heal from that pain. You'll come out a better person and one day she'll regret what she did.
Hey guys! Whatever you enjoyed doing before you met them, go do that. Do it a lot. Go out and meet friends (not mutual friends). Spend time on yourself. Spend some time by yourself. Remember that if everyone left, all you have is yourself. Learn to love yourself. Also, dont talk about them. They have gone now, so you shouldn't spend time talking about them. Preserve your energy. IF you do have to talk about them for any reason, be sure it is POSITIVE. Never say negative things about them, as it will get back to them and be twisted out of all perspective. Gents, you are kings. Much love.
As someone that has recently been broken up with and in immense pain, I personally really appreciated this video, thank you! Wishing everyone here lots of love during your difficult times, and leaving this message as a reminder that you're not alone, as the old saying goes: "this too shall pass" 🙏
Im right there with you! Just sent him a message saying he will never be able to come back and he’s terrible for thinking he has control over me. I’m done! I’m worth more! And so are u
I mean, Coach Black… I was so patient with her and kept pursuing slowly but surely. Never too pushy. Finally I had it and got furious and felt rejected and called her a name I should never call a woman. I think we all know what that word is. I apologized but expressed how disrespected and slighted I felt. I agreed to leave her be for good. Whether she forgives me for the one single time I’ve ever done something like this, is between her and God. I think that’s the biggest expression of love: forgiving someone when you know they acted out of character.
I've never experienced grieving like this. It has ebbs and flows. Literally, one day I'm fine, the next I'm crying. Today was a crying day. I missed his friendship so much today, but I can't stop thinking about how he was probably lying to me for weeks or months & how he stopped caring about me romantically. It hurts so much to think that & I don't have any answers. I've been in NC for 3 weeks since we broke up & I refuse to reach out to him. Idk when I'll feel better, but I hope it's soon because I've never felt psin like this before.
no they won‘t so don‘t care either. Be cold and forget about them they probably just uses you anyways. Would you leave someone you love? so dissappear from their life they shouldn‘t even exist to you anymore
Good video! I was really hurt when the guy I was dating for three months told me he didn’t want a commitment. I really cared about him. Luckily I have friends and family for support. I realized I deserve someone who cares about me, and I will never settle for anything less. I’m moving on to the next chapter of my life. It’s his loss that he won’t be a part of it.
This video!!!! The story of the king and the son hit me! Made me cry…… I’m in month 4 of NC with an avoidant who dropped me literally overnight….. Thank u for doing what u do!
It sucks it's been 7 months and after spending 4 years with her I'm starting to think less and less . It hurts from time to time but every time a little less , I loved her and would of done anything for her , she decided to go cheat and be with a guy she's known of since they were kids . I don't wish her any ill will but I won't give her any more rent free space in my mind or my heart .
7 months keep up the good work! its been 3 months for me. I want to get him out of my mind and heart ❤ just so hard because I had genuine feelings for him real love and care and he has treated me like absoulte trash 🗑
If he truly regretted breaking up with me he surely didn't act like it. No "I'm Sorry" Card with flowers. No showing up at my door and BEGGING for my forgivness unlike my other ex. Crazy. Maybe he never truly liked me.
I take being left or leaving as a lesson. If it wasn't working out and we couldn't fix it it wasn't ment to be. Sometimes you're jus not for someone and that's OK.
You are a blessing and helping me so much through the most difficult time in my LIFE! At 37 years old I've nevermind experienced heartbreak like I never knew what it felt like until now. Thank you you are a blessing❤️
Thank You soo much you made me look at things so differently, I am unique any one would be happy to be with me, men have tolded me this too!! Yesss!! This was hella of a movation!!
No contact didn’t work for me. I contacted my ex 3 months after the break up and she said me to move on. She again blamed the break up on me. Now I realise that she is a narcissist and I should move on completely from her.
Thanks you coach I really don’t care about her rebound took me months to go no contact i genuinely don’t care what she does but I hope one day she calls tanks again 👊🏾
I just wana say to everyone here, no one belongs to anyone! Each and one of us in our life has been from both sides, and if you haven`t trust me you will! It is very rarely that you meet someone, and you click and stay with that person for life, and this take huge amount of effort from both sides. And never say never, none of us know what may happen in future, I`m not saying to just hope that they will come back, no quite the opposite, let them go. They came by their own will, and that`s why it was beautiful. And if they want to leave, just let them go. Truly loving someone means that you will be happy for them, even if are not part of their lives anymore, even if they don`t feel the same... it is who you are, a kind soul, a loving soul. And if they decide to contact you one day, just be cool with it, be nice go out for a coffee see if they changed, look into their eyes and you will know if there is intention there, but don`t jump back in to them, they have to show, and I mean really show that they love you and it`s up to you then. And if they don`t call or text back, that`s fine, it means that the universe is guiding someone else towards you :) Stay strong, and love yourself, you are awesome!! Cheers, Tony
Im going to take this advice.. Im going to listen to you! I need to do something new! This is hard for me right now but I will Find myself and my Value !
I needed to hear this. I feel like I am losing myself. My ex ended our 7years relationship and started seeing someone in the same space were we work. I feel lost and broken.
I'm not gonna lie no contact isn't easy but for once in my life I'm feeling a bit empowerment at the thought of using this time to take myself to the next level your vids are what has made the no contact rule so much easier to go through so please keep doing what your doing
Great wisdom, and the interesting thing is that, my ex regrets losing me when she did even that night. There was a part of her that she NEVER shows anyone not even her family and I was lucky enough to see a side of her that truly showed her feelings for me as she knew that she lost me
No better way to go on war with yourself after a break up. Build your heart, wealth and relationship with yourself and other people. Show them what they lost. Don't contact her (him), and don't bad mouth them. Keep good contact with common friends and her family. If you were good for her, she will miss. But it's on you if you take them.
Remember before u miss ur ex.... Switch ur places...if u we in his place and he in urs, and so he wud have actually invested all that ..that u did....how wud u respond....?... Now coming bk to present, has he done evn 50 percnt of that....No....he has on the contrary distanced u....put u in a beggar situation with only all hurt and pain given by him.... Is he still a right candidate for u, evn now....?
Brother thank you for your words of encouragement things haven’t been too good lately I’m going threw a break up at the moment but I know it will only get better
Thanks for the video! Whenever I feel like sending a text, God hears me, God hears my cry, he understands me, and honestly talking to God about it feels a lot better than holding it in, is like a burden gets out of your chest! But I agree, we beg because we don’t know our value and worth, if you don’t recognize your worth, then who will? Obviously not your ex. I could be dying to try to send that message, but my dad told me that the man who loves you is going to look for you, and that I has been in my head. If a man wants a woman, then he puts in the interest, the effort, his heart in pursuing you… I want to let the right man come to me and not me beg for love and attention and time.
If a man wants you, he will put in the time and effort to pursue my beautiful heart ♥️ 😊 oh and I will not text my ex, even if I am dying to do so, even if it is killing me to do so, even if it hurts, even if…. With Gods help and love I will not and don’t want to… God give me the strength to do so and help me i
Oh this is bullshit … sometimes they are just not in to you. Maybe the time you came in to their lives it wasn’t the right time. Maybe they where not over their ex or maybe they are on the DL. To make a long story short. If they loved you they wouldn’t have left you its as simple as that. When the vase 🏺 is broken you can fix it but you wil always see the cracks…
I’m going though it right now but I’m going to trust the process of what you say in your videos thank you videos bring comfort to me. I have faith in the universe even though my ex right now is very negative towards me. I know the universe is going to bring her back my way she’s going to start to feel all the pain all the anxiety that I’m feeling right now, thank you bro the dynamic is going to change for the better on my behalf meaning it’s gonna work on my favor. Thank you bro for your encouragement ❤
I got broken up with a few w days ago. I’m devastated. We lived together almost three years. He kicked me out overnight and my little boy thought it was his real dad. It is so hard. My life is quite literally so in scrambles. I got an STI and I have been faithful and he accused me of all of it. He blocked me on everything and won’t even speak to me after he proceeded to call me names and told ME to kick rocks. Prayers please because I need them desperately
How do I let go? Let go of that fantasy or hope that she will come back. I ran into her yesterday and I was a mess. If she didn’t want me back before, now I doubt that there’s a chance. Why is it that we want someone who doesn’t want us and we place so much importance on that rather than just realizing that they are the ones that are missing out. For context, the relationship was beautiful all throughout but in the end it got rocky because she started her residency at the hospital. I still don’t really know why she wanted to end things but it’s been three months and I feel like I am still stuck. Thank you coach for your words, this video helped a lot
I know this to be true in my case because I took my ex for granted for 3 years while her parents gave her a hard time and she lost trust in me so eventually lost the attraction and the passion. It was exactly a month ago when she came to my home and broke up with me.. We had a super deep connection nobody would understand so I still can't believe how she could ever reach that point where she can live without me, and 3 days before the breakup we were lovey dovey as we have always been 😢 I accepted her closure and gave her mine because she still thought she had me on backup until yesterday where I told her I'm not interested in friendship, and I'm focusing on my life and goals.. She will feel the loss soon Im hoping, and will regret losing me because we were such a perfect match. Being patient and believing in God makes it easy, good luck to everybody and I wish you all get what you deserve
Book a 1 on 1 coaching session: calendly.com/breakupcoachtj
Hey man
one of the saddest things that just happened is i watched my gf go from a high quality woman to a low quality party lifestyle girl, all her friends party every weekend and drink, do weed and tons of stuff. i didnt want my girl going to those kinds of places because well im against that kinda stuff, the first party i let her go to to show i trusted her she promised not to drink or anything (she isnt even old enough to drink) but she broke my trust, ended up super drunk with puke all over herself 😂 all to fit in with those shitty friends and she wont even listen to me or her parents. last week we got into a fight and she broke up with me after.. every day she has been starting off sending me how much she loves me and stuff and wants to "give me a second chance" and then goes on about all the things i need to improve about myself and chance. when i tell her what she needs to change she goes all mad and blocks me just to start again the next day with "i miss you, i love you" today i found her on tinder too which she isnt old enough for either. she tells me i need to grow up and mature when im a year older and she is the one acting like a child. (im 18) i hate her friends for what they have done to her but honestly what can i say. her loss tbh. shes gonna find out sooner than later that i was a great guy compared to the guys she gonna attract now who will probably just use her for her body. the last thing she said was that we could be friends. then i knew i was done with her and blocked her tbh. she is so obsessed with me and yet cant sacrifice her shitty partying with her shitty friends for me😂 BUT she doesnt want to lose me either 😂😂 loved her so much so this is really breaking my heart honestly but i know im worth more than what she is degrading to now by ruining her own life
Thanks Coach 👍
If i had the $ i 💯 would
I enjoy your stories or rather the analogies you use to explain the logic..
I have this theory. The dumper feels satisfied and at peace in the beginning but afterwards, starts to feel the pain and the missing. The dumpee feels the pain initially but later on feels at peace.
💯
Well said 🤔💯🏆
I was the dumpee with my ex-gf of 5 years. Unfortunately, immature women get bored, play mental gymnastics and have no clue what they want. The masculine energy must be a compassionate leader to guide the feminine. And out of curiosity and familiarity, they always come back. Especially if you're doing greater in life for yourself (Fitness, Finance, Family).
Consequently, the ball is in your court as a dumpee. It is a choice to go back and work things out, and see if the work you put into yourself planned out. Or if there are other parts of your inner wounds that must be fixed. The best teachers in life will be your hardest relationships.
Focus on YOUrself 💪🤍☕
I really really hope your right.
@@nickelgym5239 sme thing I saying
@@DSILVAjeiy I'm exactly in this position at the moment. She says I should move on after a year. Wishes me happy birthday "to the best human I have ever known" Then she tells misses our friendship and wants to catch up, just to tell me that she has been thinking about me all day on the day after.
Told her I need to think and see how I feel about the catching up thing.
Not sure what to think about it all tbh
Edit 6 Months after:
I was contacted again, but I rejected the offer to talk and cut off all ties, because everything has been said already. I feel much better now and I am creating something new for myself.
Your ex will always miss you when they realise that they can't replace you!
They wont and i can NEVER be replaced..He will look for me in other women but wont find.
So true
She will never do better than me. Not the person and love i gave.
Or they left you for someone else and thus already replaced you and will never think about you again. That's been my experience anyway.
always true i miss my beautiful davina
For all the exes... When an ex distances u ....they actually are teaching u to learn to live without them.... So by the time the ex decides to comebk...we already have learnt to live without them
Yes, my ex was dumb enough to relocate me at my parents house but it backfired cause I started no contact and I was super clear that I don't give 2 f's if he wants to stay friends or wants to be in contact so he can take comfort in me AFTER dumping me 😂😂 he's REALLY starting to feel it now after 40 days no contact
* Learned * and I agree.
Yass! It’s been good to ruminate my emotions with God and leaning on Him for strength. I now feel like God’s Princess vs. someone else’s validation. Been less than 2 weeks and he reached out today. It was satisfying but I’m more hung up on God than him.
In my experience, i found quickly the replacement 😅and we’re now happily in a relationship 🎉
💯💯💯
My ex from 4 years ago recently reached out to me and told me he still loved me. He dumped me by text 4 years ago. Now, at the time I was very in love with this man, and it was devastating. I’ve moved on now, and I am living with someone and have a baby now.
Still, he told me that he tried to find someone else and couldn’t. That he’s thought about me for the past few years. That he regrets everything and wishes he could go back and change the decisions he made. Makes me sad but I’ve moved on now, and I made my own beautiful family ❤
Im definitely going through it right now..crying myself to sleep talking to God and waking up crying im in so much pain..my mom told me its gone hit him like a ton of bricks once he realize how he treated me
Going through the same thing right now. Put your faith in God. Trying to do the same
Never give up..pray hope and don't worry...Put your hope and faith in God..Sometimes you needed this to get closer to God!They always regret it trust me ....
It will. I’ve been there. It may take years but they do realize. I had an ex, happily remarried, reach out to me fifteen years later to apologize for treating me poorly and it would always be a regret. He made it clear he loved his wife but wanted me to know he was the one who messed it up and he hoped I was living a wonderful life because I deserved it. Take time for yourself and lean on God.
Same here sister 😢
Damn! I'm in so much pain.I can't believe he treated me like this. Guys pray for me
Funny thing is ,I wanted him back so bad ,but I decided to choose myself and go no contact ..after sometime he came back but I realized I don't even want them anymore and am happy where I am now,healed, peaceful and moving on to better thing's..
This is the thing. After you get over the initial shock of a breakup you start seeing more clearly their flaws. By time they reach out and they always do, it's far too late.
Did you delete his number. Or kept viewing his status and stories?
That's the idea of no contact..excuse my language F them.
Delete everything always.
What if they don't want u back?
By the time they spin the block they won’t be your type no more.
💯💯💯
forreal
6 months ago, I split with the girl I thought would be my wife one day. Initially, I felt depressed and hopeless, but now? I wouldn’t even think about taking her back. Keep your heads up. It does get better
Hey man. My girlfriend who I was friends with before dumped me out of the blue (in my head at least) over text. She said things like 'i just need to be by myself" etc, 2 weeks later she's on tinder. Man it hurts, can't wait to be over this shit
@@YouOnlyGetToDoItOnceyou deserve better brother
Why waste your thoughts on her.
Consider yourself saved from the real chaos and heartbreak.
Instead you'll find someone who will deserve every bit of your love and you'll be happy once again.
@@YouOnlyGetToDoItOncepeople are not allowed to break up over text
Sometimes it gets better, but not always. Sometimes it just keeps getting worse and worse until finally, you stop trying because whenever you do, it just brings pain. If I have to choose between doing nothing and being at a constant 6-7 on the pain scale, or trying and guaranteeing a 10, I'll do nothing every time.
Gave her 110% and she ended up going with someone else. I do miss her but as the days go by, the less i want her back. Focus on yourselves.
Did she come back?
I am going through that right now I will focus on myself and the pain will slowly disappear
This feeling is so weird. I miss him everyday (its been a month now), but i don't want him back just yet. I feel like i need some time by myself to put my life in order before we ever try again. Still, it hurts so bad and i miss him so much... its a confusing difficult moment
Stop letting people leave and come back to you!! They sometimes come back with incurable disease
I divorced my ex. I don’t regret one second. I would rather be alone the rest of my life than to be with her. I had enough of the gaslighting and disrespect.
Then why are you guys here 😅😂😂😂😂
Why you getting active my boy @@leratoseretsi5603
@@leratoseretsi5603shut your damn mouth
Proud of you my man.
@@leratoseretsi5603 why are YOU here?
Amen, don’t let anyone devalue or take you for granted. If your ex decides to dump you, find a better partner. Know that you are valuable and that you are number one, not your ex. They don’t get to decide anything about your life now. Do not let them ruin you, they don’t deserve your time, attention or love. Stay strong fellow dumpees you will be on top of your game again soon.
Be strong fellow dumpees😂😂😂
🤗💜
I needed this, thanks
Amen 🙏
Thank you, it's been 18 days since my break up. I'm hurting alot. And needed to read this
Never cry for someone who cheated on you because they will pay in full. 3 months ago I was abandoned by the woman I took care of for 13 years. He explained to me that he can't control his feelings after which he sent me the picture of that individual who was not able to pay the transportation costs of her going to him. On 24.03.2023 she wrote to me that she can't live without me and to go after her. How could anyone forgive such betrayal???? Be patient, time solves everything, even if it's very difficult
I lost someone I truly loved and it hurts so badly. Words don’t and won’t describe the pain I feel inside.
Me too and he got married so I'm hurt but life must go on
how are u feeling now
I'm right there with you. I trusted her so much and she knew my history of betrayal and heartbreak. Then one day she left me out of the blue for another guy in exactly the same way I'd been hurt before. She even invited him out with us because he was "just a friend", even though she'd already developed feelings for him. I watched as she slowly switched her attention from me to him until by the end of the night, I didn't exist to her. I never thought she could hurt me that much, that intentionally.
Well atleast u weren’t left when u found out u had cancer and were pregnant with their child after they said for multiple months before then they wanted to spend their life with u
@@fuzzypanda1684 sorry to hear this. There’s no such thing as a friend in the version of male to female.
I have lost so much of me. Im barely making it 😢
Thanks for giving me 9:40 minutes of clarity.
The truth is, this happens every day and we all go through same at some stage in life - either societal, friends, family , church rejections etc. But developing a mindset that rejection is a redirection and change is constant will help cushion any pain, for all things work for our good - Romans 8: 28. Bible examples are likes of Joseph, David , Daniel etc. - they were rejected but at the end was worthwhile. However it is key to develop self love and protect your worth. Stay blessed.
she set me FREE 5 mos ago after 17 mos. She is Bipolar & I believe a Narcissist. I wrote a journal, I give myself PEP talks a few x's a day in the mirror. I go over that journal. I tell myself how Awesome I am.
I'm doing things on my own, seeing friends. NO DATING!! NOT READY!! I'm working thru this Trauma Bond. Her Mom told her He's a Keeper. Her 26 yr old dau said I know he treats you like a Queen. She LOST!! 2023 NARC FREE!!
He may regret it, but I'm gone never to return. Lord just keep him away from me. I forgive him but never ever again want him near me. I bless him in Jesus name, I wish him the best.
The statement about joining in forgetting self is deep. Once one remembers who s/he is that's when the power comes to stand up and walk away from what no longer servers/uplifts us. Thank you for this!
The person that left is not always at fault
Exactly
It's their fault for hurting the person and leaving, breaking up the special connection.
The person that left is also the person that doesn’t get sympathy from anybody if they later wind up regretting their decision.
A few weeks ago I was the beggar sitting on the trunk. I was lost. I am optimistic that I will find my value again.
I went no contact and put a restraining order on my ex a hard lesson she gotta learn
How are u doing now?
I’m doing much better nowadays. I doing for me now.
I know I’ve commented on some of your previous videos but to all the people that are watching your videos this guy is right on. It is best to go in no contact because most of the time your ex doesn’t have they’re good or right intentions for you most of the time they haveproblems of their own that they need to resolve and they just have hurt you instead of resolving their problems, but this guy is a man I enjoy listening to him appreciate for all your content
Your story brought tears to my eyes!! We all need a reminder of how valuable we truly are. I’m feeling better every day even though it seems like sadness is forever... I know it will pass. Blessings
How are you now?
6 months gone for me. The love of my life. I adored her now she's living with someone doing the things we used to. I miss her so much. I needed that motivation coach Blac. Thank you. I will stay in NC - for good if need be. She knows what she lost and she will one day want it back. Will she get it ? Dunno. But she'd better hurry as I am a faithful and loyal bloke ready to move on. I will not treat any future partner the way she has treated me.
Never take them back
Update
Update please?
Update????
Update!?!??!?!
I started reading letting go at your recommendation and it's such a good read. It's weird how I try to avoid the painful emotions and how that subsequently prolongs the pain. However when I try to just feel the pain and allow it to tell me what it needs to tell me I still battle with my conscious mind taking over and not wanting me to accept the reality that I don't want. It's so tough realizing that if I don't learn to accept and be ok with things that I am preventing a reality of things getting better or any possibility of reconsiliation.
What’s book ?
@@Meyouletsgo Letting Go : The Pathway of Surrender by David R. Hawkins
This was so on point! I know the feeling.
Don't try to reconnect with him or her I tried he was so mean he even post online that I'm annoying and some stuff that wasn't cool just don't go back. Lady's forget him now I know your heart deserves better.
💯💯💯✂️
It is not every situation my ex came back and we are stronger now
I like the allegory and your message. We all have unique intrinsic value. We need to appreciate what we have. Others are free to appreciate or not.
I got broken up with a year ago and i have peace now. Theyve contacted me only two times with no true intentions and ive kept my boundaries and distance. It will get better ❤
I am hurting so much right now. I watch your videos to help me when I am feeling so weak and want to break no contact. This helps me get through these moments. I hope this works and he gets through whatever he needs to and realizes and comes back.
I totally understand you, because I felt that way at the beginning of my no contact. This terrible feeling will fade with the passing of days. I'm currently on day 41 and feeling stronger each day. Let your ex miss you. DO NOT break no contact, please!! You deserve to be missed and valued. Give this person the gift of your absence. He is not above you, he's not a king. Just a regular person. I'm sure he has faults, right? Breathe, meditate and trust the process . Everything is going to be all right!
@@almaalexandragarcia2704 The hardest part is when he reaches out to ask me questions he has answers to. I will politely answer and stop contact again. It hurts every time.
I think you're going to do really well on here, mate, very genuine person. Keep up the good work.
Thank you, I needed to hear that. This is day 2 of no contact with her and I have been depressed. My goal is to go 30 days continue to build myself up with workout and self inprovement and let go and see what happens.
Same my 2 days NC huhu
Brother it does get better. Believe me. I'm 6 weeks into No Contact after spending the first 2 weeks in hell. Yeah I was panicked. I sent a few texts and called a few times those 2 weeks. Not one reply. Not once did she answer the phone but I got through it and you will too. Go no contact on her. It'll help you so much. It's hard at first but you can do it. Your self worth is more important than chasing and begging someone who doesn't want to be with you. At least not right now. You'll have time to work on yourself and heal from that pain. You'll come out a better person and one day she'll regret what she did.
Hey guys!
Whatever you enjoyed doing before you met them, go do that. Do it a lot. Go out and meet friends (not mutual friends).
Spend time on yourself. Spend some time by yourself. Remember that if everyone left, all you have is yourself. Learn to love yourself.
Also, dont talk about them. They have gone now, so you shouldn't spend time talking about them. Preserve your energy. IF you do have to talk about them for any reason, be sure it is POSITIVE. Never say negative things about them, as it will get back to them and be twisted out of all perspective.
Gents, you are kings. Much love.
How are you doing now
@@michaelcruz204 how are you doing now
This guy is really helping me mentally
My ex trying hard to get back with me and want to buy me stuff, and I'm just like leave me tf alone
As someone that has recently been broken up with and in immense pain, I personally really appreciated this video, thank you! Wishing everyone here lots of love during your difficult times, and leaving this message as a reminder that you're not alone, as the old saying goes: "this too shall pass" 🙏
Im right there with you! Just sent him a message saying he will never be able to come back and he’s terrible for thinking he has control over me. I’m done! I’m worth more! And so are u
@@gabriellehardy4808 Go girl! power to you!💕
I mean, Coach Black… I was so patient with her and kept pursuing slowly but surely. Never too pushy. Finally I had it and got furious and felt rejected and called her a name I should never call a woman. I think we all know what that word is. I apologized but expressed how disrespected and slighted I felt. I agreed to leave her be for good. Whether she forgives me for the one single time I’ve ever done something like this, is between her and God. I think that’s the biggest expression of love: forgiving someone when you know they acted out of character.
I've never experienced grieving like this. It has ebbs and flows. Literally, one day I'm fine, the next I'm crying. Today was a crying day. I missed his friendship so much today, but I can't stop thinking about how he was probably lying to me for weeks or months & how he stopped caring about me romantically. It hurts so much to think that & I don't have any answers. I've been in NC for 3 weeks since we broke up & I refuse to reach out to him. Idk when I'll feel better, but I hope it's soon because I've never felt psin like this before.
How are you now ?
no they won‘t so don‘t care either. Be cold and forget about them they probably just uses you anyways. Would you leave someone you love? so dissappear from their life they shouldn‘t even exist to you anymore
Thank you so much for this message. It really spoke to me, in a way I didn't realise I needed and made me cry. Not sad tears, it just moved me.
Thank you needed this . This came at the right time. Really miss my ex and its been hard
My SP had gone silent on me and it’s been a week now. I needed to hear this. Thank you.
Good video! I was really hurt when the guy I was dating for three months told me he didn’t want a commitment. I really cared about him. Luckily I have friends and family for support. I realized I deserve someone who cares about me, and I will never settle for anything less. I’m moving on to the next chapter of my life. It’s his loss that he won’t be a part of it.
This video!!!! The story of the king and the son hit me! Made me cry……
I’m in month 4 of NC with an avoidant who dropped me literally overnight…..
Thank u for doing what u do!
🎉many men are jealous 😈 of ur value. ghosted u to try & bring u down to his level. Never take him back bc he'll destroy u. Trust!!!
God bless people who support those who feel like they are breaking in two
It sucks it's been 7 months and after spending 4 years with her I'm starting to think less and less . It hurts from time to time but every time a little less , I loved her and would of done anything for her , she decided to go cheat and be with a guy she's known of since they were kids . I don't wish her any ill will but I won't give her any more rent free space in my mind or my heart .
7 months keep up the good work! its been 3 months for me. I want to get him out of my mind and heart ❤ just so hard because I had genuine feelings for him real love and care and he has treated me like absoulte trash 🗑
Trust and believe that if they hurt you they will pay one way or another!
This is why we don't get into a relationship with a woman or dude that has friends from the opposite gender
If he truly regretted breaking up with me he surely didn't act like it. No "I'm Sorry" Card with flowers. No showing up at my door and BEGGING for my forgivness unlike my other ex. Crazy. Maybe he never truly liked me.
Your doing great work giving people hope and no contact works then the right person falls in your arms and eventually you forget them
I mean at the end of the day if the relationship was a toxic situation they might not regret things. Really depends on each person’s situation
I take being left or leaving as a lesson. If it wasn't working out and we couldn't fix it it wasn't ment to be. Sometimes you're jus not for someone and that's OK.
I loved this story about the beggar! Great motivation. Thank you!!
This video came right at the right moment. Thank you!
@jayray5122 it sure did!!
Wow I'm special and I didn't even know it thanks coach 👍😁
I love you, Coach. You are a good man helping us during our hard time. ❤
You are a blessing and helping me so much through the most difficult time in my LIFE! At 37 years old I've nevermind experienced heartbreak like I never knew what it felt like until now. Thank you you are a blessing❤️
Everyone is replaceable! .....says my job 😂😂😂😂
Thank You soo much you made me look at things so differently, I am unique any one would be happy to be with me, men have tolded me this too!! Yesss!! This was hella of a movation!!
Thank you Sir I am somebody and everyday she's away and puts me back where I should be.
i'm looking forward to more content about getting over an ex! Keep it up!
To be honest messaging DR OLOMOOBA was the best choice I have ever made…Thanks for bringing back my ex lover
Thank you Coach blac,
Really struggling during my separation, however your videos are very comforting.
I just wanna tell u your videos helped me to move on with out my ex
Thank you 🙏 thank you what a great story and hit me hard yes understand we are more then we think sometimes. God bless
Thank you coach blacks for your honest words of encouragement to those that need it Yahweh be praise for you through his son YESHUA
Men are always replaceble. Women do not regret anything.
No contact didn’t work for me. I contacted my ex 3 months after the break up and she said me to move on. She again blamed the break up on me. Now I realise that she is a narcissist and I should move on completely from her.
If you contacted her, then you did not stick to the No Contact rule. Move on.
Thanks you coach I really don’t care about her rebound took me months to go no contact i genuinely don’t care what she does but I hope one day she calls tanks again 👊🏾
Coach, these videos really help me.
Thank you so much!
THANKS SO MUCH FROM BOTTOM OF MY HEART ❤️ I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M CRYING RIGHT NOW😢
I just wana say to everyone here, no one belongs to anyone!
Each and one of us in our life has been from both sides, and if you haven`t trust me you will!
It is very rarely that you meet someone, and you click and stay with that person for life, and this take huge amount of effort from both sides.
And never say never, none of us know what may happen in future, I`m not saying to just hope that they will come back, no quite the opposite, let them go.
They came by their own will, and that`s why it was beautiful.
And if they want to leave, just let them go. Truly loving someone means that you will be happy for them, even if are not part of their lives anymore, even if they don`t feel the same... it is who you are, a kind soul, a loving soul.
And if they decide to contact you one day, just be cool with it, be nice go out for a coffee see if they changed, look into their eyes and you will know if there is intention there, but don`t jump back in to them, they have to show, and I mean really show that they love you and it`s up to you then.
And if they don`t call or text back, that`s fine, it means that the universe is guiding someone else towards you :)
Stay strong, and love yourself, you are awesome!!
Cheers,
Tony
Im going to take this advice.. Im going to listen to you! I need to do something new! This is hard for me right now but I will Find myself and my Value !
My oh my 😢you are so right. After my ex I fell worthless and no one will ever wants to be with me. But now my mind has definitely changed.
Ur my favorite w these videos. Ur voice brings peace and words so much clarity esp when the mind is all over the place.
This really hit me and says a lot to me
I needed to hear this. I feel like I am losing myself. My ex ended our 7years relationship and started seeing someone in the same space were we work. I feel lost and broken.
I’m 10 times stronger because of you! Thank you so much!! Stay Blessed!
I'm not gonna lie no contact isn't easy but for once in my life I'm feeling a bit empowerment at the thought of using this time to take myself to the next level your vids are what has made the no contact rule so much easier to go through so please keep doing what your doing
❤ Thank you truly because I needed this so much.
This was a beautiful story and it really hit my soul…..Thank you so much!
Great wisdom, and the interesting thing is that, my ex regrets losing me when she did even that night. There was a part of her that she NEVER shows anyone not even her family and I was lucky enough to see a side of her that truly showed her feelings for me as she knew that she lost me
That story was Devine 👌🏾
Thank you so much coach. I was going to text him I just saw your video that change my mind
Legit the most helpful breakup video i have watched. Thank you
Thanks for the encouragement bro, it's not easy but to all who are facing it courage we shall overcome it 💪🏽
been doing no contact with my ex this month, gonna take this time to move on from her
No better way to go on war with yourself after a break up. Build your heart, wealth and relationship with yourself and other people.
Show them what they lost.
Don't contact her (him), and don't bad mouth them. Keep good contact with common friends and her family.
If you were good for her, she will miss. But it's on you if you take them.
Remember before u miss ur ex....
Switch ur places...if u we in his place and he in urs, and so he wud have actually invested all that ..that u did....how wud u respond....?...
Now coming bk to present, has he done evn 50 percnt of that....No....he has on the contrary distanced u....put u in a beggar situation with only all hurt and pain given by him....
Is he still a right candidate for u, evn now....?
Brother thank you for your words of encouragement things haven’t been too good lately I’m going threw a break up at the moment but I know it will only get better
Thanks for the video! Whenever I feel like sending a text, God hears me, God hears my cry, he understands me, and honestly talking to God about it feels a lot better than holding it in, is like a burden gets out of your chest! But I agree, we beg because we don’t know our value and worth, if you don’t recognize your worth, then who will? Obviously not your ex. I could be dying to try to send that message, but my dad told me that the man who loves you is going to look for you, and that I has been in my head. If a man wants a woman, then he puts in the interest, the effort, his heart in pursuing you… I want to let the right man come to me and not me beg for love and attention and time.
If a man wants you, he will put in the time and effort to pursue my beautiful heart ♥️ 😊 oh and I will not text my ex, even if I am dying to do so, even if it is killing me to do so, even if it hurts, even if…. With Gods help and love I will not and don’t want to… God give me the strength to do so and help me i
Affording this type of help is what I want
Oh this is bullshit … sometimes they are just not in to you. Maybe the time you came in to their lives it wasn’t the right time. Maybe they where not over their ex or maybe they are on the DL.
To make a long story short. If they loved you they wouldn’t have left you its as simple as that. When the vase 🏺 is broken you can fix it but you wil always see the cracks…
What a gorgeous story❤
Thank you. I needed to hear this.
Great video... helping me through my rough patch with my break-up..thank you!
Stop spamming people’s messages!
I’m going though it right now but I’m going to trust the process of what you say in your videos thank you videos bring comfort to me. I have faith in the universe even though my ex right now is very negative towards me. I know the universe is going to bring her back my way she’s going to start to feel all the pain all the anxiety that I’m feeling right now, thank you bro the dynamic is going to change for the better on my behalf meaning it’s gonna work on my favor. Thank you bro for your encouragement ❤
Update😅
Great message behind the video…
Thanks , Coach Blac.....I needed to hear that..,it's still remains a painful journey, though.
I got broken up with a few w days ago. I’m devastated. We lived together almost three years. He kicked me out overnight and my little boy thought it was his real dad. It is so hard. My life is quite literally so in scrambles. I got an STI and I have been faithful and he accused me of all of it. He blocked me on everything and won’t even speak to me after he proceeded to call me names and told ME to kick rocks. Prayers please because I need them desperately
How do I let go? Let go of that fantasy or hope that she will come back. I ran into her yesterday and I was a mess. If she didn’t want me back before, now I doubt that there’s a chance. Why is it that we want someone who doesn’t want us and we place so much importance on that rather than just realizing that they are the ones that are missing out. For context, the relationship was beautiful all throughout but in the end it got rocky because she started her residency at the hospital. I still don’t really know why she wanted to end things but it’s been three months and I feel like I am still stuck. Thank you coach for your words, this video helped a lot
Put that energy into gym & work !
@@Meyouletsgo 😭
What do you do for a living ?
She has another man, pimpin, your contract has expired unfortunately.....I'm going thru the same
@@babyluvjr same he left me for someone else so ofc they are distracted now ! Let that honeymoon fade and she will start comparing
Very beautifully shared 🙏🏼
I know this to be true in my case because I took my ex for granted for 3 years while her parents gave her a hard time and she lost trust in me so eventually lost the attraction and the passion. It was exactly a month ago when she came to my home and broke up with me.. We had a super deep connection nobody would understand so I still can't believe how she could ever reach that point where she can live without me, and 3 days before the breakup we were lovey dovey as we have always been 😢 I accepted her closure and gave her mine because she still thought she had me on backup until yesterday where I told her I'm not interested in friendship, and I'm focusing on my life and goals.. She will feel the loss soon Im hoping, and will regret losing me because we were such a perfect match. Being patient and believing in God makes it easy, good luck to everybody and I wish you all get what you deserve