What if that was a calculation with a margin of error of let's say a few decades in the span of 10s of thousands of years. In the grand scheme of things that's accurate as fuck. And no woo woo either.
josh simpson To make it even crazier, apparently there *was* an apocalyptic coronal mass ejection (solar flare) in 2012 that would have, indeed, fried us all but the earth was tilted in suchh a way that it missed us; if it had been just a week earlier, we would be toast. Those Mayans weren’t that far off. Terrifying.
I quit participating a few years ago after I realized all the effort was expected and not appreciated. You buy gifts for your brats, I'll save my hard earned money. Merry, merry.
@@kerrie2222 Whats ridiculous is that at the end of the holidays, usually in the best case scenario, where you manage to get a gift for everyone that blood obliges you to, you barely even break even in reciprocal gifts. We might see this as being a non issue, the gesture "why dont we just not get gifts, buy ourselves what we want, pretend we gave it to each other and save the hassle" would be one to reject if it were actually extended. I have some friends where, we get each other a gift or two despite being against christmas. the gifts are always useful and made meaningful by the knowledge that we both reject the hassle. Thats the true meaning of "its the thought that counts" the fact that the person meant enough for you to go out of your way and get them something. Boomers with the luxury of time, bought by money they either earned during a time of significantly greater economic/financial prospects or have otherwise inherited as a result of said times of greater economic/financial prospects, are incapable of comprehending the burden represented by their approval being contingent on someone whoring themselves out to consumerism to get the family every gift they damn fucking sure dont deserve.
My dad would call his friends over for random BBQs & expect them to clean the grill (which sometimes hadn't been used for at least a year so the dirt was caked on,) help prep the food, etc. It was such BS. I watched a 20+ year friendship end & a fist fight almost happen over him expecting people to come over to clean the grill just to get his crappy BBQ.
its his honesty, albeit dark, that is refreshing. the rants are epic the conveyor belt of people tying to 'play the game,' put forward a clean face, clean dialogue, get those advertisers, those people are dull, boring, and disingenuous. discovered tim on JRE, hooked now
@@jonathanalpart7812 Tims entire point was that people who need therapy can't afford it.... you're countering his argument by making the same point as him 😂. I'd hardly call that disagreeing
@@grandelusion1148 Are we talking about Tim or the comment now? Either way, not being able to afford therapy is different from saying that wealthy people don't need therapy.
"Why aren't you hitting me in the head with a shovel? My head is here, there's a shovel, get to work!" Holy shit I laughed so hard at that I got hiccups.
found tim dillon last week while listening to an old theo von podcast..i now listen to his podcasts every day while working and he is my favorite comedian by far. god bless. finally someone who sees the world similarly to me...funniest man ive heard
Django Fett facts...I like Theo but he got progressively less funny and Tim totally outshined him as a guest. Dude makes me lol in traffic by myself lmao
These are “My Top 10 [podcasts] of the Decade”: The Tim Dillon Show The Tim Dillon Show The Tim Dillon Show The Tim Dillon Show The Tim Dillon Show The Tim Dillon Show The Tim Dillon Show The Tim Dillon Show The Tim Dillon Show The Tim Dillon Show
You are spot on with your opinion about therapy. Of course they are gonna tell ppl that they have problems, their livelyhood depends on it. Keep it coming brother
33:50 can totally relate.. pretty gay when you realise you've gone through the 5 stages in regards to the breakdown of familial relations. denial, anger, bargaining, depression and indifference. (i switched the last one, acceptance, for indifference)... post 'the 5 stages' its actually a relief in a way knowing these people cant bother you anymore lol. after gen Z is approaching their 40's i wonder where the state of families in north america will be
Yeah, I had a Left-y friend of mine use the Las Vegas shooting as a good reason to ban certain rifles (which she was confused about what they were anyways). I was unmoved, 2A forever.
lol @ 25:25 Just watched episode 302 - Put Them In a Big Pot right before this episode and he's talking about Francis Ellis here. They had him on and mentioned his grandfather being in the CIA and Skull and Bones in the ep
Tim is my therapist. But instead of coddling me and listening to me and my problems he makes me realize I need to stop being a bitch about it and put a lid on it. Thanks Tim😁 the world needs you!
Holy fuck you are spot on with the Chatty Kathy bit. “...the commitment issues that he has... it was just so good that it was bad, do you know what I mean?!...SHUT UP.”
Ohh and there is plenty of food- but if you plan on drinking BYOB- AND......bring some foam plates....the good china is LIMITED....cant wait to see the kids....but if they are not feeling 110% prolly should find a sitter....
Hi Tim if you ever read this, i discovered you early 2020 and easily found (for me) the best comedian. I find out new shit everyday even about your friends father giving you that 1000 dollar bill and running. Hilarious shit. You seem to light up every conversation by subsequently darkening it, or making it less PG. I went through electro convulsive therapy in 2022 and forgot about you, and then found you again. Now whenever i think of my life poorly, its a real knife fight out there. Thank you Tim
"I don't care what anyone says about me, at all. Buy the ticket. Buy the shirt". Thank you, Tim. Words to live by..
Facts
WAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKA!!!
We all should've died in 2012 like we were supposed to
What if that was a calculation with a margin of error of let's say a few decades in the span of 10s of thousands of years.
In the grand scheme of things that's accurate as fuck.
And no woo woo either.
josh simpson To make it even crazier, apparently there *was* an apocalyptic coronal mass ejection (solar flare) in 2012 that would have, indeed, fried us all but the earth was tilted in suchh a way that it missed us; if it had been just a week earlier, we would be toast.
Those Mayans weren’t that far off. Terrifying.
@@stellar7760 Apocalyptic Coronal Mass Ejection gets my vote in 2020
😊💛🍷
Too late for regrets now
"The idea that any of our problems are because people in America are not thinking enough about them selves is hilarious". Well said, sir!
disowned my family this year. best christmas ive ever had.
I quit participating a few years ago after I realized all the effort was expected and not appreciated. You buy gifts for your brats, I'll save my hard earned money. Merry, merry.
@@kerrie2222 Whats ridiculous is that at the end of the holidays, usually in the best case scenario, where you manage to get a gift for everyone that blood obliges you to, you barely even break even in reciprocal gifts.
We might see this as being a non issue, the gesture "why dont we just not get gifts, buy ourselves what we want, pretend we gave it to each other and save the hassle" would be one to reject if it were actually extended. I have some friends where, we get each other a gift or two despite being against christmas. the gifts are always useful and made meaningful by the knowledge that we both reject the hassle. Thats the true meaning of "its the thought that counts" the fact that the person meant enough for you to go out of your way and get them something.
Boomers with the luxury of time, bought by money they either earned during a time of significantly greater economic/financial prospects or have otherwise inherited as a result of said times of greater economic/financial prospects, are incapable of comprehending the burden represented by their approval being contingent on someone whoring themselves out to consumerism to get the family every gift they damn fucking sure dont deserve.
@BURNOUTRS wow you're a try hard
Props.
What about close friends???
My dad would call his friends over for random BBQs & expect them to clean the grill (which sometimes hadn't been used for at least a year so the dirt was caked on,) help prep the food, etc. It was such BS. I watched a 20+ year friendship end & a fist fight almost happen over him expecting people to come over to clean the grill just to get his crappy BBQ.
Well he’s obviously an idiot and I’m sure the Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree
We should get this guys dad on the podcast. Fuck hes a character
the father was a good man... old school grift right there
Only Tim can make me burst out laughing while I am simultaneously terrified for the future of my country.
Such a smart content
Comment
Anyone wanna bet on how it all ends? Nuclear fallout? Race wars combined with a decimated economy? China comes knocking for our debts?
As a true comedian should
@@lanesniffin730 twenty bucks says the chinese nuke us and send the survivors to camps to build the next version of the i-phone.
Tim deserves all the fame in the world
#TimDillonForBond
I knew a junkie who all she did was watch makeup tutorials, life in the big city.
This
Sounds like a good time.
L m a o
My new favorite podcast. Your rants are epic.
its his honesty, albeit dark, that is refreshing. the rants are epic
the conveyor belt of people tying to 'play the game,' put forward a clean face, clean dialogue, get those advertisers, those people are dull, boring, and disingenuous. discovered tim on JRE, hooked now
“There’s a reason I’m not upset that I didn’t win the Tour de France, it’s cuz I’m not a retard!” Words to live vy
I’m going back to the older episodes, this is such a good one!!
check out the 3am episode, and the please come kill us episode!!
@@ladeacarr4245 I love Please Come Kill us and 3am episode
168 the funniest guy I ever met and please come kill us, and MF corporate steakhouse
@@Lechatnoir3 bro the episode before this is hauntingly hilarious
@@tophercortez7786 its a good one, I love Chris and Tim together - thanks!
Honest to god, is there anything better than Timmy D on a Sunday morning?
Maaaan watchu mean on Sunday morning? Binge it
Your mom?
Heroin
Headphones at work and you'll never hate your job XD
Nothing but love for my keto king.
This podcast is definitely making my top 10 podcast of the decade.
🐷
This is a good list Tom
Thank you for this, I've been saying that for years "if you have money to spend on therapy, you don't have real problems"
Yes, but being too poor to afford therapy is a problem as well. You can't win.
@@jonathanalpart7812 I think the point of this guys comment went flying over your head
@@grandelusion1148 No, I just disagree.
@@jonathanalpart7812 Tims entire point was that people who need therapy can't afford it.... you're countering his argument by making the same point as him 😂. I'd hardly call that disagreeing
@@grandelusion1148 Are we talking about Tim or the comment now? Either way, not being able to afford therapy is different from saying that wealthy people don't need therapy.
"It's the type of guy that brings out an acoustic guitar at a party and no one asked him to." Tim, you are a national treasure.
WAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKA
"Why aren't you hitting me in the head with a shovel? My head is here, there's a shovel, get to work!"
Holy shit I laughed so hard at that I got hiccups.
I'm
I love coming back to these older episodes
This episode has given me the best emotional advice I've ever heard.
found tim dillon last week while listening to an old theo von podcast..i now listen to his podcasts every day while working and he is my favorite comedian by far. god bless. finally someone who sees the world similarly to me...funniest man ive heard
trent in the trees my new favorite comic he’s like a fat gay doug stanhope
so great you have something to take your mind off of those license plates you're making all day
Django Fett facts...I like Theo but he got progressively less funny and Tim totally outshined him as a guest. Dude makes me lol in traffic by myself lmao
I wish you well.
*Tee-off*
Damn, he's on fire in this one. So much truth being spoken
I appreciate what Tim says at the end of his Therapy Rant. About the value of forgetting. Tis true. Let it go.
It’s hilarious Tim got BetterHelp as a sponsor after this episode 😂
I would like to sincerely thank you for this podcast, Tim
These are “My Top 10 [podcasts] of the Decade”:
The Tim Dillon Show
The Tim Dillon Show
The Tim Dillon Show
The Tim Dillon Show
The Tim Dillon Show
The Tim Dillon Show
The Tim Dillon Show
The Tim Dillon Show
The Tim Dillon Show
The Tim Dillon Show
I concur.
Wow, you’re sharp.
He is authentic in a time of cookie cutter unfunny softies
If you like this, you should check out the tim dillon show.
Cause he spits hot fire!!
"Cancel your family"
James B. McGill best decision I’ve ever made
Cancel yo mama chin!
Ya know Tim, I listened to the texts you just read us and my only regret is that I haven't played more golf...
*HIGH* *QUALITY*
*LOWWWWWW* cost
𝓯𝓻𝓸𝓶 𝓹𝓸𝓭𝓬𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓽𝓲𝓶 𝓭𝓲𝓵𝓵𝓸𝓷💍
Its awesome to see how fast your RUclips channel is growing Tim
This podcast is therapy
So fire. 2020 is about to be the year of Tim Dillon.
On New Years, my fiancé and I played Skyrim and then watched the Simpson’s and went to bed. No time for CNN.
Life in the big city
@@ryancerrone5159 It’s a knife fight.
Damn. As much as I sooo love Tim now, I miss poor struggling Tim. I feel him so hard. lol
..."You're on the exit row!!!! You're nothing!!!!"... Hahaha
I am upset that there is no video, Tim.
patience
I am straight up incensed!
GoldenCheese Kindness is delicious.
@James B. McGill Yesss! I know, right??
I think we can all agree that this podcast is low cost, high quality entertainment.
Nicely done Tim. Thanks for having this show.
You are spot on with your opinion about therapy. Of course they are gonna tell ppl that they have problems, their livelyhood depends on it. Keep it coming brother
The rant on British hipsters was epic.
Aunt Dillon’s text is the most epic/relatable holiday tradition ever 😂😂
"I don't want to sit next to those ppl anymore" 🤣😂🤣😂
Just put "oooh, uh huh" and "how does that make you feel" on a loop and call it therapy
14:20 this little rant leading up to "you're still a pig!!!!!!" actually fucking kills me every time I hear it
in this pc culture tim you are a breath of fresh cigarette smoke filled air. :)
This episode is amazing. love solo tim
Tim dillon peaked. Show is shit now
business class jr for exit row seat is the best bit I've heard in a while
"Is 2020 going to be your year or not?" I lol'd
That family group text was amazing
Knowing Tim's family fights over dishes is a humbling feeling and oddly satisfying
“Doja Cats a partner at Goldman Sachs” 😂😂
just a gay dude somehow running the least gay podcast
I'm gay and I absolutely love Tim Dillon.
Best part about Tim is he's NEVER running his mouth or being condescending.
He truly is the most pious amongst us.
He was probably a polite kid.
Tim is so fucking funny. I was literally howling at the low cost jewelry at applebees.
Tim Dillon is like my weekly reality check.
He even used my name when talking about the top 10 list that I might or might not have done lol
lol you got an emergency kit for Christmas, that's so legit
33:50
can totally relate.. pretty gay when you realise you've gone through the 5 stages in regards to the breakdown of familial relations. denial, anger, bargaining, depression and indifference. (i switched the last one, acceptance, for indifference)...
post 'the 5 stages' its actually a relief in a way knowing these people cant bother you anymore lol. after gen Z is approaching their 40's i wonder where the state of families in north america will be
Gone
@@Giovanni-nj1xo que
@@kwazhims3lf Are you asking a question?
@@Giovanni-nj1xo ¿Estás haciendo una pregunta?
Yeah, I had a Left-y friend of mine use the Las Vegas shooting as a good reason to ban certain rifles (which she was confused about what they were anyways). I was unmoved, 2A forever.
I’m literally launching a jewelry line!! Hahaha!! no door to door though.
the xmass talk. i feel that.
lol @ 25:25 Just watched episode 302 - Put Them In a Big Pot right before this episode and he's talking about Francis Ellis here. They had him on and mentioned his grandfather being in the CIA and Skull and Bones in the ep
I fucking love tim for this rant
I love the therapy bit. You should really have a nice talk with Christina P (Pazsitzky). I bet mommy would love that.
As someone who is in school to become a therapist, I can say I agree wholeheartedly with Tim's analysis here.
"Final episode with no video" lol Tim you done it again.
"2020s gonna be the year the conspiracy died"
Has anything ever aged so horribly
He meant things are going to get crazier, and they did.
Tim is my therapist. But instead of coddling me and listening to me and my problems he makes me realize I need to stop being a bitch about it and put a lid on it. Thanks Tim😁 the world needs you!
Holy fuck you are spot on with the Chatty Kathy bit. “...the commitment issues that he has... it was just so good that it was bad, do you know what I mean?!...SHUT UP.”
Lol...you know that family text took 3.5 hours to type with 7 edits- and 4 reachout phone calls before it was sent! F'n love IT!...
Ohh and there is plenty of food- but if you plan on drinking BYOB- AND......bring some foam plates....the good china is LIMITED....cant wait to see the kids....but if they are not feeling 110% prolly should find a sitter....
"doja cat is a partner at Goldman Sachs" omfg bro I'm dying!
You know this episode is old when you hear Tim say Kathy Griffin is more successful than him 🤣
This one was fantastic
the therapy bit is genius
Phenomenal rants once again by Timmy Trashcan... best in the business.. Lunch w/ Steve Paddock... 😱
20:04 idk why this got me dead 💀💀💀
Fish pudding 😂😂
The best podcast!!
I've never been prouder to be from long island, best part of the week
Thanks for the content Tim. I love hearing your shit
Ending the therapy rant with an ad for better help would have been great
Kump deserves co-host
I'm very excited about the jewelry Tim!
What an awesome episode !! Spot on 🎯
Only person to make me laugh hard enough to trigger an asthma attack.
I miss the porch so much
I love the contra points name drop 😁
personally, i love the exit row, tim. leg room. leg. room.
1:11:30 Jewels by Podcaster Tim Dillon
People would pay good money to be able to sit in on Tim's therapy sessions
HIs next special should be called "live from the big city"
Hi Tim if you ever read this, i discovered you early 2020 and easily found (for me) the best comedian. I find out new shit everyday even about your friends father giving you that 1000 dollar bill and running. Hilarious shit. You seem to light up every conversation by subsequently darkening it, or making it less PG. I went through electro convulsive therapy in 2022 and forgot about you, and then found you again. Now whenever i think of my life poorly, its a real knife fight out there. Thank you Tim
Holy shit I had no idea kroll was that connected to the intelligence community. Google his dad jules b. Id be afraid of that dude too.
Chairman/CEO of an intelligence organization? What could be scary about that? 😅
"Weak people revenge. Strong people forgive. Intelligent people forget." - Albert Einstein
Intelligent people do not forget tho
"I like big butts and I cannot lie" - Sir Mixalot
Intelligent people don't care.
It's impossible to forget anything
For the record, I think the comedy's good ether way. I don't need video to too enjoy the funny.
Yep patreon is 🔥
24:00 - 27;00 THIS IS WHY I LOVE TIM!! RESPECT !
Absolutely legendary human being much love tim mohhamed stiencone
HIGH COST, LOW QUALITY ... GOTCHA!😂🤣🤣
Keep it up, timmy
well as always right om spot, surely a case of "MASS FORMATION PSYCHOSIS"
I found this episode very therapeutic