What is unusual and is a story in itself is that OP is a man and he knitted a baby blanket?!!? How marvelous! OP is a keeper. I have a feeling the SIL was the main troublemaker and brother just wanted the situation to be over. LOL
I work with a guy who regularly knits and crochets, my brother learned to crochet while in the hospital as a teenager, I taught my son when he was in 6th grade and wanted to make one for his pregnant teacher. I’ve known many quite masculine men who have done both, any repetitive motion activity is fairly soothing
Knitting and crochet are becoming more interesting and acceptable for men. There are even brands of crochet tools sized for men's hands. And yes, a hand-made baby blanket is a wonderful, precious gift, no matter the color!
Knitting was male domain stuff - created by fishermen I suspect. Something they did in downtime when they couldn't put to sea. I just count it as another skill I have, although I am not very good. I still use the scarf I knitted myself over forty years ago.
The mom with the French speaking daughter had a kid at 16, failed high school, and is IN FACT living vicariously through her far smarter daughter. It's okay, OP, you can just admit you screwed up your life and are now peeved your daughter is about to go excel, travel, grow, succeed, and probably run a wonderful business someday while holidaying (or living) in Paris.
Bet you money she's the same kind of mother who limits her daughter's food intake too. I was a dancer for a very long time (9 to 17) and had to quit my senior year as I had to work. I put on a little weight and my mom always had to say something which was ironic bc my mom has been morbidly obese for as long as I can remember. This and other control issues have lead us to be very low contact
Seriously. I wish everyone around me growing up took multilingual things more importantly. As an adult I wish I had taken language classes, it opens so much for your future and in your 30s it’s hard to start
First small bit, I was wondering why OP was saying language was so difficult. I took French and German at the same time my senior year in high school, and I aced French and got a B in German (extremely hard to get better than a C in that class, as the teacher was born in Danzig long ago, and was a stickler for pronunciation). When OP went on to deny her daughter her own dreams, I came to the same conclusion so many others did: OP was forcing her daughter to live her lost dream. That's not good parenting. That's the fastest way to have a resentful child and lose contact with them.
It’s ridiculous how entitled people can be regarding baby shower gifts. I would be so flattered to have a handmade item gifted to my child, and I personally have a soft spot for handmade blankets - you can pass those around, and it carries a much deeper sentimental value.
@@AllenTax I have a quilt my grandma made me before she passed away. I folded it up and put it in a pillow case, kept it safe in a bottom drawer. Once my kids were grown and I’m a empty nester, it is exactly where it should be….on my bed. 20 years later, it looks like it did the day she gave it to me. 😊
My grandmother didn't even knit the blanket, but used a white felted material and stitched the child's name in it; it is still incredibly precious. "She'll sue over the hostile work environment (from eating a banana)", what about the hostile work environment she is creating with her baseless complaints?
If I was one of Op's co-workers, I'd invite them to my home, along with a few others. The plan would be that OP stops bringing bananas in for a week. I'd ask that everyone brings a banana when the week is up, and to spread the word.
Learning other languages has far much more advantage than dance. Let your daughter learn languages, they’re beneficial in the long run and could land to much more better job roles. This is from someone who is learning her own native language (Irish) and will be starting French
My daughter did competitive dance from ages 7-17.5, and loved it. Her choice. She also studied ASL as her foreign language requirement, she took it in high school at the local community College. She absolutely loved both, but guess which one is helping her get a job while at University (UC Berkeley). Hint it isn't dance 🤣. Dance is awesome, but unless you want to go into entertainment it isn't very useful.
my sister knitted my baby a green and cream coloured blanket...perfect for either gender (she also knitted my partner a matching daddy sized blanket of the same colour and pattern)...those blankets are now in a keep sake box that my son will have for his future child and him!
Yep my mum would knit things in a lovely pale mint green since I wasn’t into the whole totally pink or blue thing when there are so many beautiful colours out there.
also that dad should look up the history of knitting, there was a time it was man thing and there were whole guilds surrounding it women weren't allowed to learn it back then either.
@@velvety2006 true! Men wore earrings first as well! Sailors would pierce their ear and wear a gold ring. The thought was that if they ever went overboard and drowned, if the body washed up the earring would pay for the funeral. As it was attached to the body there was little chance of it washing away say out of a pocket or such.
@@lynprincevalli5221 also at least in my country men wore knitted sweaters with designs that were linked to their towns, also to help identify if they drowned
And if you live in a country where arms aren't allowed for personal protection (pepperspray may be forbidden as well), hairspray can do the trick as well.
@@barvdw A small can of spray on liniment (sloans, transvasin, deep heat, etc) also works very well as anyone who has had a locker room accident can attest. It is also legal to carry, as long as it is not a weapon (honest. its not a weapon officer, i just got the wrong can from my pocket) in areas where carrying pepper spray is an issue. Get one of those gas r@pe alarms to put in the other pocket so you can claim that, in your panic, you sprayed the wrong one in the attackers face :D
More important than being comfortable around guns is to have the will to use it when called for. If you have the slightest inkling that you will be unable to end someone, don't carry.
The problem with a fire-arm, like a knife, is that if you so much as hesitate, then it can be taken from you and used on you. Not everyone has the discipline, or temperament, to just potentially kill someone in an instant when threatened and that hesitation, when actually escalating to deadly force, can backfire. A weapon should only be drawn when the decision to use potentially deadly force has already been made. Never as a threat. Never as a bargaining chip. This is why I advocate for unarmed, or using non deadly weapons, training instead. Many people who say they would be prepared to use are fooling themselves, and many of those would be more dangerous to themselves, and others, through panic and adrenaline. When even armed police officers panic and use deadly force inappropriately and endanger innocents, what can be expected of an untrained (in combat, not gun use) civilian who is already scared, which is why they have the gun?
@@barvdw a small bottle deo spray is more believeable to have with you in reach of hands for use instead of hair spray If it happens you could just claim you can't stand the smell of sweat and didn't plan to use it as a weapon
All it would have took was one random person to say "NTA" and her daughter would still be doing something she's not interested in, because OP would say, "see, I'm right. Mother knows best".
When I was in the Navy there was a sailor in one ship who knitted. During one run he knitted himself an Irish fisherman sweater, a true work of art. Nobody hassled him about knitting and a couple of other guys asked to be taught how to knit.
I had a registry for my baby shower but it wasn't ridiculous price wise. I think $40 was the most expensive and even then, you didn't have to do a registry gift. That was just for the essentials. Any gifts, from the registry or not, regardless of price were greatly appreciated. You know my favorite gift though? The hand made one's for my son. We kept those even when he grew out of them.
The only reason sometimes people put expensive things on the registry is at places like Bed Bath and Beyond and the bay you get 50% off any item on your registry list up to a year after your wedding or baby shower. I'm getting married we put a new washer and dryer on the registry I don't expect anyone to buy me a washer or dryer but I will take the 50% off. That doesn't sound like the case here it sounds like they just want other people to fund their childbearing activities
I'm 40 almost 41 and somewhere in the house I have two blankets handmade made for me when I was a baby. I loved those things as a child and still have them.
My kiddo used a large crib blanket that was crocheted for her for years after she was a baby. It was a nice size to pull down around her shoulders or cover her legs in a chair. She'd long since grown out of diapers, onsies, bibs etc and so on.
To the OP whose daughter wishes to quit dance: YTA! YOU REMIND ME OF MY MOTHER! She wanted a brilliant, genius child. Pushed me to start college classes and join a bunch of clubs while in high school. I was a mess with insomnia at that pace and it took my father telling her to back off to get her to stop trying to force me to be the little genius her mother always praised her for being. Furthermore, mom says she had to quit pursuing her PhD to be a doctor because she married my father and had me. After I finished college with my BS and went to work as a lab tech, she nagged the heck out of me to keep going: get my Masters and PhD in my field. She knew my employer would probably pay part or all on my education. I told her no, I'm happy where I'm at and I don't care if it doesn't have further upper management etc. She wouldn't let it be because I wasn't an overly ambitious corporate climber like her. I don't respect my mother for pushing me to do things I didn't want to do. And it started in junior high with my wanting to quit piano lessons and playing, but she didn't want me to because she liked listening to me play. You have a choice: be a controlling biotch or be supportive and happy for the things that make your daughter happy. Appreciate the gifts she has. Sounds to me like she has the gift of learning languages and that is something that could open many opportunities for her. Good luck!
Wonder if daughter even wanted to dance in the first place or it was forced on her but mom I want to draw NO YOU ARE TAKING DANCING LESSONS AND THATS FINAL
I'm so angry for the first OP! A month of love in each stitch thrown away because they wanted something from their pretentious registry. OOOO that makes me burn up, I would kill for a blanket made for me by my uncle. Im not even getting into the rest of what makes this story suck. That blanket!!!
Unless one is in the top 1% of dancers it's almost impossible to make a living as a dancer. However I was hired for one well-paying job because I speak fluent French. My uncle was a professional translator because he was fluent in five languages. OP should encourage daughter to learn languages because they'll be more useful to her in the real world.
The blanket was a perfect gift. The nerve to return it. You gave a gift and it was returned…they are completely entitled, my kids survived while using hand me downs.
My nephew's entire rooms were second-hand when they were babies. closets, beds, and changing tables. my sils reasons? new is expensive and the baby isn't gonna care if it's old or new and we can get them new things when they actually can tell us what they like.
Yes. Don't reward rude behavior with a new gift. And if he doesn't have the money, then he doesn't have the money. SIL is greedy and brother sucks for not standing up for his brother.
My sister crocheted a blanket for our first child, which has kept our other children warm as well, and will keep our grandchildren warm, too. Much loved and appreciated keepsake. Handmade gifts are the best.
A hand-knitted blanket shows that the giver put time and effort into the gift. After the mother threw it back because "it's the wrong color" would mean they shouldn't expect OP to give them anything more.
@@Ambidexter143 as a crafter, not only does a knit blanket take serious time and skill, but decent yarn is not cheap. I made a simple blanket for my nephew (toddler) recently and he loves it. It was a stash buster, using up various colors of worsted weight yarn. Boy colors? Just colors I happened to have in my scrap basket. He practically grabbed it off my crochet hook and walked off with it. (It was not initially made for him, just started as a project to use up scraps while improving my range of motion in my hand, but now it’s his and he’s not sharing his blanket from Auntie.)
@@Ambidexter143 seriously, if you can’t appreciate the time, effort, skill, and money in handmade gifts, that person is Not Knitworthy. Looks like SIL wants dollar tree gift baskets for the rest of forever. Hope she likes family movie night. (Popcorn bucket, microwave popcorn, 2 boxes of candy, a 2 liter of Faygo, and maybe a code for a streaming rental.
The former football player Rosey Grier knitted (don’t know if he still does). I’d love to have seen someone challenge him in his prime about his knitting!
@@saran.4001 He also knitted and crocheted as well as needlepoint. A lot of us knit, crochet, and do embroidery and/or needlepoint. Needlepoint is basically embroidery with yarn, and I know several people who do both.
Story 2: Can you hear that? In case you can’t that’s the sound of me smacking my head against my monitor. 🤦🏼 There was comment in a comedy show many years ago which apt for today but I’ll paraphrase it, “Society will convict you for anything you do, society will convict you for anything you don’t do and it won’t let a silly thing like innocence, get in the way!”
“I am a narcissist who expects her daughter t keep on doing dance, which she doesn’t like, and won’t allow her to take extra language lessons, her passion, because it interferes with the dance that fulfills MY dreams. Tell me I am a great Mom and she is awful for dating to have dreams different from MINE and also for thinking she should have a say in her future.”
My mom was the same way! I actually quit playing while she was on vacation in Europe for a month. Lol by then I couldn't get back in for lessons because her classes were full 🙃 😅 🤣. She was pissed!
Story 2: NTA and your HR is way out of line. I will say this to anyone. Never ever write an apology letter at work. Time and time again I've seen people do this to genuinely try to create an olive branch and do the "right thing". Then upper management and hr use it against them later claiming it was an admission of guilt. Them suggesting it with no evidence and saying you're creating a hostile work environment is beyond outrageous and unprofessional.
@@velvety2006 definitely a possibility. I'd like to hope not. Like I said I'm way more upset with HR for not at least doing a proper mediation on the situation and jumping to OP potentially creating a hostile work environment.
Story 1: WTF?!?!? NTA! Has everyone in OP's family lost the plot? First they reject a lovingly made gift, then demand more expensive gifts? What planet are they from?!?!? I completely agree with the last comment; don't buy them anything. Story 2: These kinds of ridiculous complaints only make it more difficult for legitimate workplace harassment complaints. OP should definitely threaten to sue if HR continues with this. Story 3: OMG yes, OP is so much the AH! SOOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!! Story 4: This guy is stalking OP. Since she's filed a report, there's officially a record. She needs to continue keeping records of his behavior. And let her co-workers know. NOT the AH. That guy needs help, but he probably won't get it. Story 5: Absolutely NOT the AH. He needs to learn and, yes, he needs better therapy.
If you return a handmade gift don't ever expect another gift from me. I don't care what relationship we have, someone that rude and entitled is not worth keeping around. Banana story: what no one has mentioned is that OP likes just shoving the banana in and out of his mouth a bunch of times before he takes a bite. 🍌🤤
It sounds like the new girl gets turned on by bananas, and is embarrassed. She's lucky she's not a gay bloke! It might be harder to hide his excitement... 🤣
My grandma gave me a crocheted throw when I was in high school. The colors clashed horribly with my decor. I am 62 years old, and would never part with that throw under any circumstances. Even though it never has, and never will match my decor. I treasure it because my grandmother spent all of those hours working on something just for me. OP in story 1 was amazing to spend all of those hours making that blanket for his coming niece. Sister-in-law is disgusting, shallow, and entitled for not accepting that baby blanket and all of the love that went into it. OP needs to tell her and anyone that backs her to F off.
I feel for OP’s daughter. I absolutely *LOVE* languages and it’s something I’ve been interested in since I was about eight. I’m 26 and still love it. It’s incredibly beneficial whenever you get a job saying you’re learning a language or more-I actually got hired specifically because I was learning Mandarin. Spanish would most definitely be beneficial for the daughter to learn.
I had a suitemate in college who was in the ABT. She took a raft of shit from her mother when she quit ballet to go to college. She had some ugly feet, boy.
@@northstarsmith6798 In the post, the daughter said she wanted to do one of the languages in her school-which was Spanish as OP mentioned. It’s also statistically one of the most commonly and widely known languages (others that aren’t English including French and Mandarin).
Oh, I think enough people can speak Spanish already. Why not challenge yourself and learn to speak a language like Hebrew or Farsi or Russian? You could be quite valuable with those skills, as well. JMO
The banana story made me think of a similar story where the op was being harassed because her co worker/office Karen accused her of eating her baked potato in a sexual/suggestive manner. I fully understand some people can be creepers but sometimes people are just eating food to satisfy hunger [the potato story ended in OP's favor]
@@electrobuster5483 It was not a regular baked potato, she ate small cooked ones like fingerfood or biscuits/cookies. I think it was a japanese way of eating them, and local Karen of the easily offended was also racist. So she harassed OP, and also other people who dared to bring such horrors as food from other cultures (curry).
Last story--here's something you need to know about raising two kids who are close in age: like it or not, there's always competition between the two, either overt or subconscious. Thus, when one kid is being punished, the other is nearly always in a state of near-jubilation watching their sibling get disciplined. The "Yeah, James," no doubt with the trademarked accompanying smirk, likely sent the older kid over the edge, especially if there's already a perception that the step-son is the "favorite" (let's face it--for some reason, parents nearly always favor the younger sibling). The older kid deserved to be punished, and this punishment fits the crime. However, one hard and fast rule in my house is that when one is being punished, the other doesn't chime in. They simply mind their business and keep their pie-hole shut, or they're next.
I totally agree and I bet there is a bit more to the backstory. I find it also irritating that the parents knew, that the older has anger issues but when a fight between the brothers breaks out they don't make two steps to be present and dissolve it?
I was just thinking to myself "well, if I had anger issues and my step-brother decided to say 'yeah, stop it OP' I would probably do the same", is it a reasonable reaction? no. is it a good reaction? not. is it better than throwing it at the other kid? definitely.
I feel like the coworker in the banana story is one of those people that just looks for an excuse to sue companies. I would also start looking For bizarre ways that can't be mistaken as sexual to start eating bananas.
A hand knitted blanket is a wonderful, well loved gift in my eyes. A neighbor made one for my sister, when my niece was born. My niece slept with that blanket till she passed away. She had it with her in the hospital when she died from a brain aneurysm shortly after her 21st birthday. That sis in-law sounds sounds terrible.
Exactly children seem to instinctively know when something has been lovingly made plus navy is wonderful since it won’t show dirt and will be able to have potential lifelong use (yes I’m a mum!)
Also if Op brother has another child it 50/50 odds that would be a boy but my guess Op brother wants another baby shower because they sold everything after the baby grew to big for it
I had both my kids out of wedlock and come from a religious family. I expected a lot of judgement because I had no desire to be wed. I was shocked when 2 of my elderly relatives crocheted and knitted gorgeous blankets instead of giving the typical nasty opinions others gave. I think so much more highly of these 2 lovely ladies. One said she didn't care where or how the babies come, because god doesn't care.
For the first story when a friend had a baby registry and a few big ticketed items we asked if we could chip in to help out. The new parents didn't care, they just put it there as a reminder to purchase in the future before the baby comes. I can see having like a group chip in to buy a crib (if they wanted to) but yeah a home made gift is way better then anything else.
Also because some places give you a discount on things on the registry that didn't get bought by guest. So you can put a stroller there not expecting anyone to buy it then later the store might give you a 10-20% discount on it.
That is exactly what we do. First time parents need a LOT of stuff. Big ticket items are purchased by groups so that no individual has to contribute more than they're comfortable with.
Yes. Our family a group of us would contribute to larger items and with my coworkers we do this as well. I work with 40 people so if everyone contributes even a small amount we can get a big ticket item.
What? I'm struggling financially myself, with serious health problems, and I couldn't afford anything on my friend's registry when her child was born. So I wrote a lullaby, recorded myself singing it, and sent her the recording along with the lyrics. She completely understood, and was very happy with the lullaby as a gift.
I love, love, LOVE that gift idea!!! What an amazing one of a kind gift for their baby. I’m also stuck unable to work due to bad heath, so do you mind if I steal this idea for a present in the future? 😅
Similar with my bro, I am the chronically ill sibling that hasn't been able to recover financially for about 7 months now, I had gotten them some essentials way before hand when I was still working and bro had never once mentioned me having to contribute more financially cuz I was an immediate fam member. For the baby shower, I baked! And they were delighted !
Each of my twins received 2 crocheted blankets (2 different people). My twins are now 4, and I still have those blankets. They're beautiful, and it's beyond disrespectful to sniff at such a gift.
True.. dancing is very competitive , and not always well paying if you’re not lucky enough to be well known in the field.. jobs looking for people with language skills, especially multiple languages, would have a good chance of high paying salaries IMO.. Mom is making daughter hate dancing and resenting her..
Story 1: NTA. Point 1) Registries are a suggestion, not a demand. If you want to get a crib, you know exactly which crib they would prefer and what brand of this or that is their top pick. That doesn't mean you're locked into their list. Point 2) Any gift is a gift. It doesn't matter if it's the most horrendously ugly thing you've ever seen or if you have 20 copies of this item that you're never going to need a replacement for, you smile and say thank you. That's the polite thing to do. If someone rejects your gift, that's on them, not you. Point 3) A handmade blanket is lovely for a child. I had several growing up, and the color didn't matter as much as being warm. Blankets are often treasured items as a kid, especially handmade ones, and its very sad that your brother and his wife took that away from their child. Point 4) A grab bag of small necessities is also a gift. You gave them lots of gifts. That was kind and thoughtful. Solution 1: At this point, I'd donate $20 or whatever you had to spare to charity in your niece or nephew's name. One that provides formula to infants or something like that. Get them a lovely card with a donation slip in it. By that point you will have given them three different gifts. Solution 2: Say at this point you'd prefer to play fairy godfather and buy X for their 16th birthday or Prom outfit or some other long term goal.
The banana story. I used to work in state government for about 24 years, and I can tell you from both personal and observational experience I have seen stupider reasons that people got in trouble for. Getting in trouble for eating a banana is a nothing burger in my former work world. Dance story: OP is YTA. Listen to your daughter. I just found out from that at the very end my daughter detested ice skating, but wasn't allowed to quit until she was almost 18 (T.L.;DR my mother).
Last story) Kids dont smash stuff for nothing?! Has this person ever interacted with children?. when raised wrong (even when raised right) they throw tantrums, break stuff, shout etc.. that behavior needs to be nipped in the bud and not tolerated.
Fair bet that unless son grew up an only child who had his every wish met and was never told no, we're not getting the full story here. Did dad cheat? Meet current wife shortly after the divorce and rush into marrying her? Is son an afterthought in the new family dynamic while stepson and new wife are the priority? Son was absolutely wrong to destroy the Xbox and he should be responsible for replacing what he broke, but I'm betting there's some unmentioned assholery from other parties here.
@@lupinforestgreen7614this is what I hate about AITA commenters like you, instead of judging with the info given, you look for ways for op to be the AH with "what-ifs" all OP asked was is he the AH for reasonably punishing his kid.
Dance mom story: yta. Let the kid learn another language. Knowing multiple languages will benefit her more in the long run over knowing any dance moves.
@@Nevertoleave yup. And it's sad, the kid was too scared to even say anything and when she did, got in trouble for it. I've got a kiddo, I'd rather invest in activities she enjoys, whether they have a benefit or not
@@MrBeevee5 that's what I'm thinking. I only speak one language and work with a handful of first language Spanish speakers, and two that speak French as their first language. Luckily, we all can communicate fine but it feels like it would be easier if I understood Spanish and French a bit better lol
Obviously, Dad is living in a 1950's bubble. But if he went further back in history, as someone posted above, thousands of years ago, knitting was considered a MEN'S ONLY activity! And pink was a boy's color, and blue was for girls-So, take that, gender-obsessed people!
My kids got plenty of blankets quilted and knitted from loved ones!!! They LOVE them and I am so grateful people took the time to make something so special! These parents to be are entitled beyond belief
The family is story 1 is absolutely ridiculous. Other people were invited to the baby shower, it should not be all up to OP. They're waiting to do the nursery layout for his gift?? I paint, I often give paintings as gifts. I don't care what's on your registry. I'm giving you a hand-made gift. I put time and love into that.
I always felt that it was the parents responsibility to purchase any big ticket items so our registry was all items that maxed out at around $30. And I'd say half of the things we got were like clothes or books that weren't on there. It's not your family/friends job to 100% prepare you for your kid. It's your job as the parents.
Let's see. Son takes xbox and destroyed it along with the TV. Son's mother is blaming OP accusing him of favoring stepson, who did not break anything, over his son, who broke an xbox and TV. Yeah, she sounds logical to me.
Also commenters claiming that it's not the full story are just annoying, the assumption that something must have happened to make the kid angry is just that... an assumption. Have they never heard of conditions like IED or similar? I suppose it is possible he's acting out due to the divorce and dad getting remarried etc. But it's also possible that he has a psychological condition or he's just an ahole.
His mommy dearest with no brain can replace the TV and game console that her nasty son sin destroyed and he can stay with her 100% of the time. Report his behavior to his therapist.
@@black1917 - Funnily enough, if the OP had been mom instead of dad they'd all have been falling over themselves to find evidence of parental alienation.
To the OP who knitted a blanked for SIL baby shower: your gift is much more wonderful than all of their registered items combined! You give a handmade gift - so much more special because it took time and love to make! It's so wonderfully thoughtful! And if those Aholes can't understand that you can't afford their expensive crap, then screw them! Your parents ought to understand your situation. If you were in my family, we would have added your name on the card with our gift without you even paying a penny! We understand which family members don't have $ to give much, if any, gift. The recipient of the gift doesn't know any different - we tell them we took up a collection and all went in together for the gift. My ex is one of my best buddies and I love his family. I know he usually can't afford Christmas gifts, so I have him help me make necklaces for his family (I make jewelry). The kids love the handmade gifts that their aunt and uncle make. There are plenty of these sorts of things your family could have helped you with. Only insensitive Aholes do the kind of crap they did! They should have graciously accepted your gift and thanked you for being so thoughtful! Registry gifts are great, buy usually not so personal.
I don't know about the rest of the world, but the United States have forgotten about the definition of what a gift is. First of all if a gift is required to come to a party it's no longer a gift but rather a payment to attend the party. A gift is something that's given from the heart of an individual and it can be given at any time any place in anywhere. It is up to the giver to give not for the receiver to man a gift.
I have always let my kids decide what they wanted to do for extracurriculars. My oldest was a competitive cheerleader for several years and she grew tired of it and told me she wanted to quit. I made her finish out the season because I had already paid $6k and I wasnt going to lose out on it. There was only 4 months left in the season. I told her she had made a commitment to her coach and her squad. They also already had a routine and they would have had to change it. I also told her that if she truly wanted to quit, that after the season was over, she could do so if she wanted. Parents-Do Not force your children to do activities they dont want to do. She learned 2 important things. Compromise and that I do care about her feelings. Compromise with them and LISTEN to them.
Story 1: As my kindergarten teacher said, "You get what you get and don't get upset." OP NTA. They didn't want it in the beginning, why bother making another one for ungrateful people. Story 3: YTA. OP is trying to live through her child. Also learning languages/knowing more than one language looks really good on a resume and could land you some good job opportunities. Why make her do something she doesn't want to do anymore?
“What is you a grown man doing knitting” Uh probably having a great time I wish I could knit but I’m not good at it. Edit: my mother in law has made my kids most of their blankets and one of my favorite blankets she made me. She took the time to Process and dye the wool they are amazing gifts sorry for your family OP :(
My kids are grown now. I’ve forgotten most of the baby shower items from so long ago. But what I do remember is the hand made baby blankets. They were so special! I kept them for when my kids have kids of their own. They are heirlooms.
I strongly dislike those people that designate colours to a specific gender. It's a baby blanket... homemade, too! Who cares what the colour is? If I was pregnant and holding a baby shower, I'd be grateful for any gift for my baby. It wouldn't matter if there was a registry and family and friends opted to buy those items or not...
I'm American and always thought that registries were suggestions at most from the new couple/parents on what they needed, not what was expected to be bought. SIL sounds super entitled and I'd welcome low contact to avoid her future hellspawn. Mom sounds bad crazy and OP should direct his family to r/entitled parents/people with the quote,"you sound like the people in these stories". Then tell bro that if his kid turns out like the EKs of reddit he can expect no babysitting from him ever.
The story of the stalker of OP: I think the parents know actually what their son is like, that comment that they would talk to him got him before blocking OP. If they didn’t then I think they would have said the same as the fiancée and called OP a liar. They should be disgusted and horrified just yet either until they have asked their son about it. If you jump straight disgusted and horrified before corroborating the accusation then that is something more about you than the accused. Its innocent UNTIL proved guilty. I don’t doubt the OP’s veracity but can I be certain, investigate first, condemn later! We know it don’t like that in the real world but it’s what it should be.
2nd Story: Why is the new employee staring at OP while he's eating his banana? The new person is the one with the problem. Sad, but this is the reason I don't consume bananas in public. If I do, I break it off or have it pre-sliced. One too many creepy stares did the trick.
Stalker story: People like him usually don't stop unless they get either badly scared or badly hurt or both. I read a comment on something like this where a girl was being harassed by a guy and nothing was being done. But she had some relatives from out of state and they paid him a visit. They didn't kill him or even hurt him that badly (since he could still walk). But the guy moved away immediately afterwards and never contacted her again.
Story 1. The father's reaction is so ridiculous. For the record, a quilt made by a MAN won best in show in the huge quilt competition in Pigeon Forge, TN this year. Needlework is not gender defined. Also, NTA. Those people only care about their image
A number of famous American football players are well known knitters. They consider it relaxing. I doubt that dad would say that to the face of some guy built like a tank.
I have 3 framed needle work pieces on my wall that were made by my grandfather for my grandmother when they were engaged. He was in the merchant marine and then the navy. He took up needlepoint for something to do in the long hours he was off duty on the ships.
With some of these stereotypes, who knows where they came from. Between knitting, men not being allowed to cook or able to clean... just why? I doubt any religious texts say anything like "thou shalt not knit".
Story 1: Absolutely NTA and don't even consider getting them something else. I love all the handmade items and even hand me downs my family and in-laws made/ gave me. Their response to "not the right color" was super immature and entitled. I appreciated all gifts even when not on the registry. There's always something someone forgets to add or didn't consider. I do want to say however to those who say it's entitled to put big ticket items on a registry maybe it's just me but I expect all baby needs big and small on a registry. Most of those bigger items are meant to be used by all the kids so it's a one time buy. For most reasonable people they will just buy whatever is left over for themselves. I know in my family people would pull together for a big ticket item and no one had a problem with that. I certainly never expected one person to buy me something like a stroller or carseat it would be like a 2-5 person item so that people were spending like $50 at best. Like I said I never expected it but was more than appreciative if someone did.
Languages won’t help OP’s daughter in life? Yes she’d get by with English okay but knowing other languages would hugely help her with jobs. Holy moly. I wish I had that much of a love for languages. Maybe she’ll be a linguist or something too. 😮
I never saw a "list" for presents in all the baby showers I have been to. Surprise gifts are part of the fun. Two or three people would pool money to get big ticket items. Common sense.
They have a lot of nerve demanding a specific gift for a damn baby shower. I don't even like a registry for a wedding. But that's me . I put a lot of thought into gifts that I give.
When I was pregnant with my son I didn’t have a baby shower or gift registry. Honestly hate baby showers and the games. Me and my parents bought most of what my son needed. Everyone else gave what they could or what felt right for them. At the time, my son was the fifth generation and each one before him made him a blanket. He’ll be 10 this summer and I still have them all. Everything else I donated or gave away as soon as he grew out of it. Those blankets were from the heart and even more special now that my great-grandmother has passed.
Story 1: NTA. Honestly all the baby showers that I've been to (I'm from a Mexican background) had no registry. I didn't even know they were a thing until a few years ago. It honestly sounds very entitled, but it might be a cultural difference. I can't imagine demanding gifts for a baby that YOU chose to bring into the world fully knowing how expensive kids are.
When you receive a gift, you say thank you. You be gracious. You do not make demands. You do not get to tell others what to spend on you. You are grateful that someone went out of their way for you and you appreciate it. That's not just good manners - that's comment sense!
Baby Gift Story: I've always felt it should be the responsibility of the expecting parents to provide big ticket items for themselves. If they need to rely on others to provide essentials such as a crib, baby furniture, a stroller or other high end items, they aren't prepared to have a child and they shouldn't do so. The moral of the story here being "stop having children when you can't afford them!"
Amen! (I am not religious but amen says it better than any other word.) Wait until you are ready financially and emotionally before having children. It is taxing, requires patience, and emotional maturity to do it right. There are already too many people in the world. And it is a 24/7 and 365 days a year job. That couple is not ready for parenthood if they act like brats about shower gifts. The SIL is obviously not mature enough to be a mother if she rejected a hand knitted blanket. 🤦♀️
Regarding story one... OP is not the Ahole! During a period of financial difficulty when he could not afford an expensive gift from "The Registry" OP created a handcrafted piece that took many hours of hard work. Entitled SIL said "Wrong color. Not good enough. Go into debt and get me somethin I want!!!" A couple (/s) of issues here: In my life experience most expectant mothers are overjoyed just with diapers and baby wipes or gift cards for same, because most know those are the biggest ongoing expense for the baby. Also: as a fairly respected crafts person myself, some have the attitude that hand made, no matter what the quality or effort, are worthless in relation to store bought, even if the store is Walmart.
When I had my oldest daughter my husband’s (boyfriend at the time) neighbor made my daughter a baby blanket, I still have that blanket. It went through my daughter, my two sons and my two grandsons.
The story about the smashed xbox and step sibling drama Bio-mom needs to disclose information about everyone she allows around the kid because the only explanation for acting like that is that the kid has experienced some kind of trauma.
Story 1 NTA. We got nothing off of our registry when my first was born, we didn’t get mad or anything we said thank you and bought everything that we needed because at the end of the day we chose to have the baby so we chose to pay for what we need. It was no one else’s responsibility.
Story 1 In the first place the parents have a nerve expecting expensive items from a registered. Secondly there is nothing wrong with a man knitting. My ex husband can crochet. A hand knitted blanket is usually welcome as a gift for a baby. OP sil was extremely rude. The mother who refuses to allow her daughter to quit dance classes to take languages is really ignorant. OP's assertion that learning languages is unnecessary is unbelievable. It is always an advantage if you can speak another language.
last story I know what make him smash a xbox n tv his parents saying no when a kid act out I find it funny that the try so hard to blame the dad when he give his kid conquences.
I've knitted for many years, and it _STILL_ takes me about 40 hours to make a generously-sized baby blanket. As I've RARELY even received a sincere "thank you," let alone, perhaps a kind gesture, anything as "strenuous" as an e'mailed photo of the baby WITH the blanket. I now refuse to make any more. Screw 'em! At one time I knitted not only a blanket, but also matching sweater, booties, and cap, all in a lace stitch, for the grandchild of my DH's cousin who happened to be born on my Husband's birthday. I "WAS" thanked very graciously in person, but the mother also, ON HER OWN INITIATIVE, repeatedly promised photos of the baby wearing the outfit. Never heard from the mother again. Several years later the mother started sneaking off with her SIL's husband (her husband's sister's spouse), so they broke up TWO families with a total of OVER 10 kids between them! (Not too surprisingly, these people were *ALL **_VERY_* outspoken, "Fundamentalist Christians," of the "holier than you sect.") I was NOT impressed. All was not lost, however, as I had purchased a lifelike baby doll, dressed it in the outfit, then photographed it with the knitted pieces, so I, at least, have a visual reminder of all that work I had done - with love.
If I were to go on say, Etsy, and tried to find a handmade knitted blanket it would cost me at least $100. This is justifiable, knitting takes forever and it is a skill I know I lack. Plus aren't most registries set up with the understanding that you're probably not going to be getting all your high-cost gifts? You just sort of putting them on there to put them on there? Like you might get it, or it gives people a chance to contribute as a group to a larger gift? But a handmade gift that took hours and was done just for my baby? That is priceless.
A long time ago, I knitted a baby blanket for a co-worker. She was thrilled with it. Several years later, we were talking and she said her son still had the blanket and was keeping it for when he had his own child! WOW!🥲💕
"When the hell did a 14 year old learn that phrase" She is truly the most foolish parent ever... She ignores her daughter's wishes so hard that she doesn't understand how her linguist daughter learned a word or "phrase" Let that sink in!
Our family prefers hand made items as gifts as they show the personal effort put forth. And some really nice “stuff” has been produced over the years. And the associated memories.
What is unusual and is a story in itself is that OP is a man and he knitted a baby blanket?!!? How marvelous! OP is a keeper. I have a feeling the SIL was the main troublemaker and brother just wanted the situation to be over. LOL
I work with a guy who regularly knits and crochets, my brother learned to crochet while in the hospital as a teenager, I taught my son when he was in 6th grade and wanted to make one for his pregnant teacher. I’ve known many quite masculine men who have done both, any repetitive motion activity is fairly soothing
Knitting and crochet are becoming more interesting and acceptable for men. There are even brands of crochet tools sized for men's hands. And yes, a hand-made baby blanket is a wonderful, precious gift, no matter the color!
If that's the case, then OP's brother needs to rein his wife in, or just suffer. OP should just let it be as is.
Knitting was male domain stuff - created by fishermen I suspect. Something they did in downtime when they couldn't put to sea. I just count it as another skill I have, although I am not very good. I still use the scarf I knitted myself over forty years ago.
Who remembers that big ol football player, Rosie Grier? He did needlework
The mom with the French speaking daughter had a kid at 16, failed high school, and is IN FACT living vicariously through her far smarter daughter. It's okay, OP, you can just admit you screwed up your life and are now peeved your daughter is about to go excel, travel, grow, succeed, and probably run a wonderful business someday while holidaying (or living) in Paris.
She'll live in Paris and holiday in sunny Spain!
This is the Life!
Bet you money she's the same kind of mother who limits her daughter's food intake too. I was a dancer for a very long time (9 to 17) and had to quit my senior year as I had to work. I put on a little weight and my mom always had to say something which was ironic bc my mom has been morbidly obese for as long as I can remember. This and other control issues have lead us to be very low contact
Seriously. I wish everyone around me growing up took multilingual things more importantly. As an adult I wish I had taken language classes, it opens so much for your future and in your 30s it’s hard to start
First small bit, I was wondering why OP was saying language was so difficult. I took French and German at the same time my senior year in high school, and I aced French and got a B in German (extremely hard to get better than a C in that class, as the teacher was born in Danzig long ago, and was a stickler for pronunciation). When OP went on to deny her daughter her own dreams, I came to the same conclusion so many others did: OP was forcing her daughter to live her lost dream. That's not good parenting. That's the fastest way to have a resentful child and lose contact with them.
It’s ridiculous how entitled people can be regarding baby shower gifts. I would be so flattered to have a handmade item gifted to my child, and I personally have a soft spot for handmade blankets - you can pass those around, and it carries a much deeper sentimental value.
My mom is into knitting. Had made blankets for me and my two brothers and made a cap for me when I got older. She passed in November.
@@AllenTax I'm sorry for your loss. You'll treasure those items she made for you forever.
They're second only to weddings.
Getting ready to pass on the baby blanket my great grandmother made nearly 50yrs ago. Literally don't make yarn like they used to.
@@AllenTax I have a quilt my grandma made me before she passed away. I folded it up and put it in a pillow case, kept it safe in a bottom drawer. Once my kids were grown and I’m a empty nester, it is exactly where it should be….on my bed. 20 years later, it looks like it did the day she gave it to me. 😊
My grandmother didn't even knit the blanket, but used a white felted material and stitched the child's name in it; it is still incredibly precious.
"She'll sue over the hostile work environment (from eating a banana)", what about the hostile work environment she is creating with her baseless complaints?
that would be my go-to next time they gave me shit, but inform them of the lawsuit via lawyer... watch their collective anuses pucker...
If I was one of Op's co-workers, I'd invite them to my home, along with a few others. The plan would be that OP stops bringing bananas in for a week. I'd ask that everyone brings a banana when the week is up, and to spread the word.
Learning other languages has far much more advantage than dance. Let your daughter learn languages, they’re beneficial in the long run and could land to much more better job roles.
This is from someone who is learning her own native language (Irish) and will be starting French
Exactly, I am trying to learn a new language besides English it's very hard.
My daughter did competitive dance from ages 7-17.5, and loved it. Her choice. She also studied ASL as her foreign language requirement, she took it in high school at the local community College. She absolutely loved both, but guess which one is helping her get a job while at University (UC Berkeley). Hint it isn't dance 🤣. Dance is awesome, but unless you want to go into entertainment it isn't very useful.
It’s honestly a lot of fun for me personally. I’m learning Mandarin, Japanese, Korean and French. I’m also interested in Norwegian and Vietnamese.
Want an example of Hysterical Irony? "You don't need to know any other language! And where did you learn a word like 'vicariously' anyways!?!"
@@benlutz1974 , yeah, OP doesn't sound like much of a reader. I am glad her husband and sister were both on the daughter's side.
my sister knitted my baby a green and cream coloured blanket...perfect for either gender (she also knitted my partner a matching daddy sized blanket of the same colour and pattern)...those blankets are now in a keep sake box that my son will have for his future child and him!
I love that idea! How thoughtful!
Yep my mum would knit things in a lovely pale mint green since I wasn’t into the whole totally pink or blue thing when there are so many beautiful colours out there.
also that dad should look up the history of knitting, there was a time it was man thing and there were whole guilds surrounding it women weren't allowed to learn it back then either.
@@velvety2006 true! Men wore earrings first as well! Sailors would pierce their ear and wear a gold ring. The thought was that if they ever went overboard and drowned, if the body washed up the earring would pay for the funeral. As it was attached to the body there was little chance of it washing away say out of a pocket or such.
@@lynprincevalli5221 also at least in my country men wore knitted sweaters with designs that were linked to their towns, also to help identify if they drowned
For the woman being stalked!---get pepper spray. Personally, I have a carry permit but not everyone is comfortable with firearms.
And if you live in a country where arms aren't allowed for personal protection (pepperspray may be forbidden as well), hairspray can do the trick as well.
@@barvdw A small can of spray on liniment (sloans, transvasin, deep heat, etc) also works very well as anyone who has had a locker room accident can attest. It is also legal to carry, as long as it is not a weapon (honest. its not a weapon officer, i just got the wrong can from my pocket) in areas where carrying pepper spray is an issue. Get one of those gas r@pe alarms to put in the other pocket so you can claim that, in your panic, you sprayed the wrong one in the attackers face :D
More important than being comfortable around guns is to have the will to use it when called for. If you have the slightest inkling that you will be unable to end someone, don't carry.
The problem with a fire-arm, like a knife, is that if you so much as hesitate, then it can be taken from you and used on you. Not everyone has the discipline, or temperament, to just potentially kill someone in an instant when threatened and that hesitation, when actually escalating to deadly force, can backfire. A weapon should only be drawn when the decision to use potentially deadly force has already been made. Never as a threat. Never as a bargaining chip.
This is why I advocate for unarmed, or using non deadly weapons, training instead.
Many people who say they would be prepared to use are fooling themselves, and many of those would be more dangerous to themselves, and others, through panic and adrenaline. When even armed police officers panic and use deadly force inappropriately and endanger innocents, what can be expected of an untrained (in combat, not gun use) civilian who is already scared, which is why they have the gun?
@@barvdw a small bottle deo spray is more believeable to have with you in reach of hands for use instead of hair spray
If it happens you could just claim you can't stand the smell of sweat and didn't plan to use it as a weapon
Language story - another parent trying to live through her daughter. The daughter was 100% correct.
So true.
All it would have took was one random person to say "NTA" and her daughter would still be doing something she's not interested in, because OP would say, "see, I'm right. Mother knows best".
@@Dondizle I suspect you are right with this particular parent.
@@Dondizlethis mom will like her own post and take it as confirmation
What a sweet thing to knit.
When I was in the Navy there was a sailor in one ship who knitted. During one run he knitted himself an Irish fisherman sweater, a true work of art. Nobody hassled him about knitting and a couple of other guys asked to be taught how to knit.
@@Ambidexter143 Aran fisherman sweaters are wonderful 💜 each pattern has a significance like good luck and safe sea travels
I had a registry for my baby shower but it wasn't ridiculous price wise. I think $40 was the most expensive and even then, you didn't have to do a registry gift. That was just for the essentials.
Any gifts, from the registry or not, regardless of price were greatly appreciated.
You know my favorite gift though? The hand made one's for my son. We kept those even when he grew out of them.
The only reason sometimes people put expensive things on the registry is at places like Bed Bath and Beyond and the bay you get 50% off any item on your registry list up to a year after your wedding or baby shower. I'm getting married we put a new washer and dryer on the registry I don't expect anyone to buy me a washer or dryer but I will take the 50% off. That doesn't sound like the case here it sounds like they just want other people to fund their childbearing activities
Amen because the baby is going to puke, piss or shit on them. I got two nephews I saw it first hand.
I'm 40 almost 41 and somewhere in the house I have two blankets handmade made for me when I was a baby. I loved those things as a child and still have them.
@@ButtonsCasey You are a wonderful person.
My kiddo used a large crib blanket that was crocheted for her for years after she was a baby. It was a nice size to pull down around her shoulders or cover her legs in a chair. She'd long since grown out of diapers, onsies, bibs etc and so on.
To the OP whose daughter wishes to quit dance: YTA! YOU REMIND ME OF MY MOTHER!
She wanted a brilliant, genius child. Pushed me to start college classes and join a bunch of clubs while in high school. I was a mess with insomnia at that pace and it took my father telling her to back off to get her to stop trying to force me to be the little genius her mother always praised her for being.
Furthermore, mom says she had to quit pursuing her PhD to be a doctor because she married my father and had me. After I finished college with my BS and went to work as a lab tech, she nagged the heck out of me to keep going: get my Masters and PhD in my field. She knew my employer would probably pay part or all on my education. I told her no, I'm happy where I'm at and I don't care if it doesn't have further upper management etc. She wouldn't let it be because I wasn't an overly ambitious corporate climber like her.
I don't respect my mother for pushing me to do things I didn't want to do. And it started in junior high with my wanting to quit piano lessons and playing, but she didn't want me to because she liked listening to me play.
You have a choice: be a controlling biotch or be supportive and happy for the things that make your daughter happy. Appreciate the gifts she has. Sounds to me like she has the gift of learning languages and that is something that could open many opportunities for her. Good luck!
Wonder if daughter even wanted to dance in the first place or it was forced on her but mom I want to draw NO YOU ARE TAKING DANCING LESSONS AND THATS FINAL
I'm so angry for the first OP! A month of love in each stitch thrown away because they wanted something from their pretentious registry. OOOO that makes me burn up, I would kill for a blanket made for me by my uncle. Im not even getting into the rest of what makes this story suck. That blanket!!!
Thankfully, it wasn't thrown away but given to another person.
@@MrBeevee5 oh I know, thank goodness for that. The cow that denied it threw it away to a much more deserving home.
My mom knitted a blanket and tiny booties for me when I was pregnant, I loved them, my daughter is almost 18 and I still have them.
Unless one is in the top 1% of dancers it's almost impossible to make a living as a dancer. However I was hired for one well-paying job because I speak fluent French. My uncle was a professional translator because he was fluent in five languages. OP should encourage daughter to learn languages because they'll be more useful to her in the real world.
The blanket was a perfect gift. The nerve to return it. You gave a gift and it was returned…they are completely entitled, my kids survived while using hand me downs.
My nephew's entire rooms were second-hand when they were babies. closets, beds, and changing tables. my sils reasons? new is expensive and the baby isn't gonna care if it's old or new and we can get them new things when they actually can tell us what they like.
Yes. Don't reward rude behavior with a new gift. And if he doesn't have the money, then he doesn't have the money. SIL is greedy and brother sucks for not standing up for his brother.
My nephews did we did
My sister crocheted a blanket for our first child, which has kept our other children warm as well, and will keep our grandchildren warm, too. Much loved and appreciated keepsake. Handmade gifts are the best.
Its a gift. If they want more then they need to buy. It takes a while to knit or crochet any gift.
OP made it clear he doesn't have the money. If brother is so upset he can buy something and say it's from OP to end the fight.
A hand-knitted blanket shows that the giver put time and effort into the gift. After the mother threw it back because "it's the wrong color" would mean they shouldn't expect OP to give them anything more.
@@Ambidexter143 as a crafter, not only does a knit blanket take serious time and skill, but decent yarn is not cheap. I made a simple blanket for my nephew (toddler) recently and he loves it. It was a stash buster, using up various colors of worsted weight yarn. Boy colors? Just colors I happened to have in my scrap basket. He practically grabbed it off my crochet hook and walked off with it. (It was not initially made for him, just started as a project to use up scraps while improving my range of motion in my hand, but now it’s his and he’s not sharing his blanket from Auntie.)
@@Ambidexter143 seriously, if you can’t appreciate the time, effort, skill, and money in handmade gifts, that person is Not Knitworthy. Looks like SIL wants dollar tree gift baskets for the rest of forever. Hope she likes family movie night. (Popcorn bucket, microwave popcorn, 2 boxes of candy, a 2 liter of Faygo, and maybe a code for a streaming rental.
"Why are you as a grown ass man knitting."
I'd like to hear OP's father say that in a front of a bunch of old school sailors.
My grandfather showed me how to sew, he learnt in WWII
The former football player Rosey Grier knitted (don’t know if he still does). I’d love to have seen someone challenge him in his prime about his knitting!
It baffles me that men marry wmen like the sister in law, while there are so many adorable, nice, amazing, loving wmen that can't get a date
@@JosieJOK Grier did crewel needlepoint, he made dining chair seat covers.
@@saran.4001 He also knitted and crocheted as well as needlepoint. A lot of us knit, crochet, and do embroidery and/or needlepoint. Needlepoint is basically embroidery with yarn, and I know several people who do both.
Story 2: Can you hear that? In case you can’t that’s the sound of me smacking my head against my monitor. 🤦🏼 There was comment in a comedy show many years ago which apt for today but I’ll paraphrase it, “Society will convict you for anything you do, society will convict you for anything you don’t do and it won’t let a silly thing like innocence, get in the way!”
“I am a narcissist who expects her daughter t keep on doing dance, which she doesn’t like, and won’t allow her to take extra language lessons, her passion, because it interferes with the dance that fulfills MY dreams. Tell me I am a great Mom and she is awful for dating to have dreams different from MINE and also for thinking she should have a say in her future.”
She actually made a second post because no one agreed with her on the first
My mom was the same way! I actually quit playing while she was on vacation in Europe for a month. Lol by then I couldn't get back in for lessons because her classes were full 🙃 😅 🤣. She was pissed!
@@jeanniebosch3628 Sounds like you have your own back though! Seriously, good for you! That’s the only way to deal with that stuff.
Story 2: NTA and your HR is way out of line. I will say this to anyone. Never ever write an apology letter at work. Time and time again I've seen people do this to genuinely try to create an olive branch and do the "right thing". Then upper management and hr use it against them later claiming it was an admission of guilt. Them suggesting it with no evidence and saying you're creating a hostile work environment is beyond outrageous and unprofessional.
it sounds like she might be just looking for an excuse to sue, i wonder how many times she has switched just until she ended at op's
@@velvety2006 definitely a possibility. I'd like to hope not. Like I said I'm way more upset with HR for not at least doing a proper mediation on the situation and jumping to OP potentially creating a hostile work environment.
I would tell HR that if they sided with her I sue them and they will stop because they are cowards
Absolutely takes the piss HR took her word without any evidence, and she could've made OP lose his job for nothing.
OP should get a body cam and a desk cam though. I don't think he is out of the woods yet.
Story 1: WTF?!?!? NTA! Has everyone in OP's family lost the plot? First they reject a lovingly made gift, then demand more expensive gifts? What planet are they from?!?!? I completely agree with the last comment; don't buy them anything.
Story 2: These kinds of ridiculous complaints only make it more difficult for legitimate workplace harassment complaints. OP should definitely threaten to sue if HR continues with this.
Story 3: OMG yes, OP is so much the AH! SOOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!
Story 4: This guy is stalking OP. Since she's filed a report, there's officially a record. She needs to continue keeping records of his behavior. And let her co-workers know.
NOT the AH. That guy needs help, but he probably won't get it.
Story 5: Absolutely NOT the AH. He needs to learn and, yes, he needs better therapy.
She'll dance out of your life when she becomes 18 yrs old and beyond your manipulating control.
If you return a handmade gift don't ever expect another gift from me. I don't care what relationship we have, someone that rude and entitled is not worth keeping around.
Banana story: what no one has mentioned is that OP likes just shoving the banana in and out of his mouth a bunch of times before he takes a bite. 🍌🤤
Eeww WTF that's disgusting
Makes sense if the new employee was a guy. LOL
I can deep throat a banana without gagging, but it never occurred to me to do so at work...opportunities sadly missed, I'm retired now.
My theory was that he ate it while staring unblinking at the new girl (while not really LOOKING, if you know what I mean).
It sounds like the new girl gets turned on by bananas, and is embarrassed. She's lucky she's not a gay bloke! It might be harder to hide his excitement... 🤣
My grandma gave me a crocheted throw when I was in high school. The colors clashed horribly with my decor. I am 62 years old, and would never part with that throw under any circumstances. Even though it never has, and never will match my decor. I treasure it because my grandmother spent all of those hours working on something just for me.
OP in story 1 was amazing to spend all of those hours making that blanket for his coming niece. Sister-in-law is disgusting, shallow, and entitled for not accepting that baby blanket and all of the love that went into it. OP needs to tell her and anyone that backs her to F off.
I bet the kid would have probably loved it too.
I have a coaster embroidered by my grandaunt. I would prefer to lose body parts to let it go.
I still have a lamb knitted by my grandma, I was also the last grandchild she knitted anything for I think she bought things for the younger ones lol
I still have the brown, orange, and yellow blanket my mom, grandma and aunt made in the 70s. When they were learning to crochet.
I feel for OP’s daughter. I absolutely *LOVE* languages and it’s something I’ve been interested in since I was about eight. I’m 26 and still love it. It’s incredibly beneficial whenever you get a job saying you’re learning a language or more-I actually got hired specifically because I was learning Mandarin. Spanish would most definitely be beneficial for the daughter to learn.
You are so right.
I had a suitemate in college who was in the ABT. She took a raft of shit from her mother when she quit ballet to go to college. She had some ugly feet, boy.
Why Spanish?
@@northstarsmith6798
In the post, the daughter said she wanted to do one of the languages in her school-which was Spanish as OP mentioned. It’s also statistically one of the most commonly and widely known languages (others that aren’t English including French and Mandarin).
Oh, I think enough people can speak Spanish already. Why not challenge yourself and learn to speak a language like Hebrew or Farsi or Russian? You could be quite valuable with those skills, as well. JMO
The stalking story: brilliant way of handling the unsafe situation.
The banana story made me think of a similar story where the op was being harassed because her co worker/office Karen accused her of eating her baked potato in a sexual/suggestive manner. I fully understand some people can be creepers but sometimes people are just eating food to satisfy hunger [the potato story ended in OP's favor]
how in the blue blazes do you eat a BAKED POTATO suggestively
@@electrobuster5483 It was not a regular baked potato, she ate small cooked ones like fingerfood or biscuits/cookies. I think it was a japanese way of eating them, and local Karen of the easily offended was also racist. So she harassed OP, and also other people who dared to bring such horrors as food from other cultures (curry).
@@kristinakjellgren9839 that makes it worse for the karen.
I thought of that story, too, while listening to this one. Some people are just weird and look for reasons to complain.
@@electrobuster5483 True! A utter nutter, AND racist is a hostile work enviroment in progress...
Last story--here's something you need to know about raising two kids who are close in age: like it or not, there's always competition between the two, either overt or subconscious. Thus, when one kid is being punished, the other is nearly always in a state of near-jubilation watching their sibling get disciplined. The "Yeah, James," no doubt with the trademarked accompanying smirk, likely sent the older kid over the edge, especially if there's already a perception that the step-son is the "favorite" (let's face it--for some reason, parents nearly always favor the younger sibling).
The older kid deserved to be punished, and this punishment fits the crime. However, one hard and fast rule in my house is that when one is being punished, the other doesn't chime in. They simply mind their business and keep their pie-hole shut, or they're next.
I totally agree and I bet there is a bit more to the backstory. I find it also irritating that the parents knew, that the older has anger issues but when a fight between the brothers breaks out they don't make two steps to be present and dissolve it?
I was just thinking to myself "well, if I had anger issues and my step-brother decided to say 'yeah, stop it OP' I would probably do the same", is it a reasonable reaction? no. is it a good reaction? not. is it better than throwing it at the other kid? definitely.
I feel like the coworker in the banana story is one of those people that just looks for an excuse to sue companies. I would also start looking For bizarre ways that can't be mistaken as sexual to start eating bananas.
A hand knitted blanket is a wonderful, well loved gift in my eyes. A neighbor made one for my sister, when my niece was born. My niece slept with that blanket till she passed away. She had it with her in the hospital when she died from a brain aneurysm shortly after her 21st birthday. That sis in-law sounds sounds terrible.
Exactly children seem to instinctively know when something has been lovingly made plus navy is wonderful since it won’t show dirt and will be able to have potential lifelong use (yes I’m a mum!)
Also if Op brother has another child it 50/50 odds that would be a boy but my guess Op brother wants another baby shower because they sold everything after the baby grew to big for it
I had both my kids out of wedlock and come from a religious family. I expected a lot of judgement because I had no desire to be wed. I was shocked when 2 of my elderly relatives crocheted and knitted gorgeous blankets instead of giving the typical nasty opinions others gave. I think so much more highly of these 2 lovely ladies. One said she didn't care where or how the babies come, because god doesn't care.
For the first story when a friend had a baby registry and a few big ticketed items we asked if we could chip in to help out. The new parents didn't care, they just put it there as a reminder to purchase in the future before the baby comes. I can see having like a group chip in to buy a crib (if they wanted to) but yeah a home made gift is way better then anything else.
It’s literally the only reason I have a registry, lol.
@@Nevertoleave it would be the same for me if i ever have a kid
Also because some places give you a discount on things on the registry that didn't get bought by guest. So you can put a stroller there not expecting anyone to buy it then later the store might give you a 10-20% discount on it.
That is exactly what we do. First time parents need a LOT of stuff. Big ticket items are purchased by groups so that no individual has to contribute more than they're comfortable with.
Yes. Our family a group of us would contribute to larger items and with my coworkers we do this as well. I work with 40 people so if everyone contributes even a small amount we can get a big ticket item.
What? I'm struggling financially myself, with serious health problems, and I couldn't afford anything on my friend's registry when her child was born. So I wrote a lullaby, recorded myself singing it, and sent her the recording along with the lyrics. She completely understood, and was very happy with the lullaby as a gift.
I love, love, LOVE that gift idea!!! What an amazing one of a kind gift for their baby. I’m also stuck unable to work due to bad heath, so do you mind if I steal this idea for a present in the future? 😅
Aw, that's so sweet. Your friend would have something unique for her baby that she could either sing or press the recording for baby to listen to.
Similar with my bro, I am the chronically ill sibling that hasn't been able to recover financially for about 7 months now, I had gotten them some essentials way before hand when I was still working and bro had never once mentioned me having to contribute more financially cuz I was an immediate fam member. For the baby shower, I baked! And they were delighted !
Wow, this is amazing... be my friend so I can also have a personalised lullaby for my child if I ever have one.
@@TheNormExperience of course I don't mind! Enjoy your creativity!
They don't understand the assignment. If a person can't afford what's on the gift list, be grateful and accept what they can gift you.
Each of my twins received 2 crocheted blankets (2 different people). My twins are now 4, and I still have those blankets. They're beautiful, and it's beyond disrespectful to sniff at such a gift.
The chances of her getting success from learning languages versus dance is very high. Even dancers who gain some success are rarely well-paid.
True.. dancing is very competitive , and not always well paying if you’re not lucky enough to be well known in the field.. jobs looking for people with language skills, especially multiple languages, would have a good chance of high paying salaries IMO.. Mom is making daughter hate dancing and resenting her..
Story 1: NTA. Point 1) Registries are a suggestion, not a demand. If you want to get a crib, you know exactly which crib they would prefer and what brand of this or that is their top pick. That doesn't mean you're locked into their list.
Point 2) Any gift is a gift. It doesn't matter if it's the most horrendously ugly thing you've ever seen or if you have 20 copies of this item that you're never going to need a replacement for, you smile and say thank you. That's the polite thing to do. If someone rejects your gift, that's on them, not you.
Point 3) A handmade blanket is lovely for a child. I had several growing up, and the color didn't matter as much as being warm. Blankets are often treasured items as a kid, especially handmade ones, and its very sad that your brother and his wife took that away from their child.
Point 4) A grab bag of small necessities is also a gift. You gave them lots of gifts. That was kind and thoughtful.
Solution 1: At this point, I'd donate $20 or whatever you had to spare to charity in your niece or nephew's name. One that provides formula to infants or something like that. Get them a lovely card with a donation slip in it. By that point you will have given them three different gifts.
Solution 2: Say at this point you'd prefer to play fairy godfather and buy X for their 16th birthday or Prom outfit or some other long term goal.
Language is power! as a 21-year old who moved out of my birthcountry at age 20, language opens so, so many doors for jobs!
The banana story. I used to work in state government for about 24 years, and I can tell you from both personal and observational experience I have seen stupider reasons that people got in trouble for.
Getting in trouble for eating a banana is a nothing burger in my former work world.
Dance story: OP is YTA. Listen to your daughter. I just found out from that at the very end my daughter detested ice skating, but wasn't allowed to quit until she was almost 18 (T.L.;DR my mother).
Last story) Kids dont smash stuff for nothing?! Has this person ever interacted with children?.
when raised wrong (even when raised right) they throw tantrums, break stuff, shout etc.. that behavior needs to be nipped in the bud and not tolerated.
more like bio mom is telling him dad does not like him anymore he just likes his stepson.
Fair bet that unless son grew up an only child who had his every wish met and was never told no, we're not getting the full story here. Did dad cheat? Meet current wife shortly after the divorce and rush into marrying her? Is son an afterthought in the new family dynamic while stepson and new wife are the priority?
Son was absolutely wrong to destroy the Xbox and he should be responsible for replacing what he broke, but I'm betting there's some unmentioned assholery from other parties here.
@@lupinforestgreen7614this is what I hate about AITA commenters like you, instead of judging with the info given, you look for ways for op to be the AH with "what-ifs" all OP asked was is he the AH for reasonably punishing his kid.
Dance mom story: yta. Let the kid learn another language. Knowing multiple languages will benefit her more in the long run over knowing any dance moves.
Another parent living vicariously through their child
More likely a good future too.
@@Nevertoleave yup. And it's sad, the kid was too scared to even say anything and when she did, got in trouble for it. I've got a kiddo, I'd rather invest in activities she enjoys, whether they have a benefit or not
@@MrBeevee5 that's what I'm thinking. I only speak one language and work with a handful of first language Spanish speakers, and two that speak French as their first language. Luckily, we all can communicate fine but it feels like it would be easier if I understood Spanish and French a bit better lol
"Why are you as a grown man knitting?"
🤣 gave me a good chuckle
Obviously, Dad is living in a 1950's bubble. But if he went further back in history, as someone posted above, thousands of years ago, knitting was considered a MEN'S ONLY activity!
And pink was a boy's color, and blue was for girls-So, take that, gender-obsessed people!
@@nancyomalley6286 this
My kids got plenty of blankets quilted and knitted from loved ones!!! They LOVE them and I am so grateful people took the time to make something so special! These parents to be are entitled beyond belief
the dance/language one: damn lady how many times do u need to hear ur wrong lmao
The family is story 1 is absolutely ridiculous. Other people were invited to the baby shower, it should not be all up to OP. They're waiting to do the nursery layout for his gift?? I paint, I often give paintings as gifts. I don't care what's on your registry. I'm giving you a hand-made gift. I put time and love into that.
I always felt that it was the parents responsibility to purchase any big ticket items so our registry was all items that maxed out at around $30. And I'd say half of the things we got were like clothes or books that weren't on there. It's not your family/friends job to 100% prepare you for your kid. It's your job as the parents.
Let's see. Son takes xbox and destroyed it along with the TV. Son's mother is blaming OP accusing him of favoring stepson, who did not break anything, over his son, who broke an xbox and TV. Yeah, she sounds logical to me.
Also commenters claiming that it's not the full story are just annoying, the assumption that something must have happened to make the kid angry is just that... an assumption. Have they never heard of conditions like IED or similar?
I suppose it is possible he's acting out due to the divorce and dad getting remarried etc. But it's also possible that he has a psychological condition or he's just an ahole.
His mommy dearest with no brain can replace the TV and game console that her nasty son sin destroyed and he can stay with her 100% of the time. Report his behavior to his therapist.
@@goawayleavemealone2880 My money's on the ex encouraging the behavior.
@@black1917 - Funnily enough, if the OP had been mom instead of dad they'd all have been falling over themselves to find evidence of parental alienation.
yep
The whole gift registry for any occasion is so crass.
Emotional blackmail, for the uncle. They jare just trying to pressure him to provide something expensive.
To the OP who knitted a blanked for SIL baby shower: your gift is much more wonderful than all of their registered items combined! You give a handmade gift - so much more special because it took time and love to make! It's so wonderfully thoughtful!
And if those Aholes can't understand that you can't afford their expensive crap, then screw them! Your parents ought to understand your situation. If you were in my family, we would have added your name on the card with our gift without you even paying a penny! We understand which family members don't have $ to give much, if any, gift. The recipient of the gift doesn't know any different - we tell them we took up a collection and all went in together for the gift.
My ex is one of my best buddies and I love his family. I know he usually can't afford Christmas gifts, so I have him help me make necklaces for his family (I make jewelry). The kids love the handmade gifts that their aunt and uncle make.
There are plenty of these sorts of things your family could have helped you with. Only insensitive Aholes do the kind of crap they did! They should have graciously accepted your gift and thanked you for being so thoughtful! Registry gifts are great, buy usually not so personal.
The story about the stalker is nuts, the amount of women that are killed by exs and stalkers is shocking. More needs to be done for this woman....
Stalker story: If she can, OP needs to send all her information to the fiancee's PARENTS so they can help their (stupid) daughter dodge a bullet.
I don't know about the rest of the world, but the United States have forgotten about the definition of what a gift is. First of all if a gift is required to come to a party it's no longer a gift but rather a payment to attend the party. A gift is something that's given from the heart of an individual and it can be given at any time any place in anywhere. It is up to the giver to give not for the receiver to man a gift.
I have always let my kids decide what they wanted to do for extracurriculars. My oldest was a competitive cheerleader for several years and she grew tired of it and told me she wanted to quit. I made her finish out the season because I had already paid $6k and I wasnt going to lose out on it. There was only 4 months left in the season. I told her she had made a commitment to her coach and her squad. They also already had a routine and they would have had to change it. I also told her that if she truly wanted to quit, that after the season was over, she could do so if she wanted. Parents-Do Not force your children to do activities they dont want to do. She learned 2 important things. Compromise and that I do care about her feelings. Compromise with them and LISTEN to them.
Vicariously is a great word!
Breaking TV and Xbox. If your Ex thinks this is too severe, have *her* pay for a new TV and Xbox.
Forcing someone to continue doing a sport they don't like creates resentment. Your hubby is right. Apologize, and let her quit.
That stalker is going to just spin it as OP being sensitive over someone looking up what an old ex was doing
Nta. It is a gift. No one owes anyone a gift. The blanket was a handmade original. That has no pricetag. The sil and bro are greedy.
Who values a store bought item over hand made gifts? I’d be keeping that blanket forever.
People that don’t knit or crochet do not understand the amount of work that goes into a piece. Good god the entitlement!
Story 1: As my kindergarten teacher said, "You get what you get and don't get upset." OP NTA. They didn't want it in the beginning, why bother making another one for ungrateful people.
Story 3: YTA. OP is trying to live through her child. Also learning languages/knowing more than one language looks really good on a resume and could land you some good job opportunities. Why make her do something she doesn't want to do anymore?
We say, “You get what you get and don’t throw a fit.” Wonder how different our accents are lol.
My kindergarten teacher hated me. I thought I imagined it but I found out she really hated my little sister, too.
“What is you a grown man doing knitting”
Uh probably having a great time I wish I could knit but I’m not good at it.
Edit: my mother in law has made my kids most of their blankets and one of my favorite blankets she made me. She took the time to
Process and dye the wool they are amazing gifts sorry for your family OP :(
My kids are grown now. I’ve forgotten most of the baby shower items from so long ago. But what I do remember is the hand made baby blankets. They were so special! I kept them for when my kids have kids of their own. They are heirlooms.
I strongly dislike those people that designate colours to a specific gender. It's a baby blanket... homemade, too! Who cares what the colour is? If I was pregnant and holding a baby shower, I'd be grateful for any gift for my baby. It wouldn't matter if there was a registry and family and friends opted to buy those items or not...
I'm American and always thought that registries were suggestions at most from the new couple/parents on what they needed, not what was expected to be bought.
SIL sounds super entitled and I'd welcome low contact to avoid her future hellspawn. Mom sounds bad crazy and OP should direct his family to r/entitled parents/people with the quote,"you sound like the people in these stories". Then tell bro that if his kid turns out like the EKs of reddit he can expect no babysitting from him ever.
The story of the stalker of OP: I think the parents know actually what their son is like, that comment that they would talk to him got him before blocking OP. If they didn’t then I think they would have said the same as the fiancée and called OP a liar. They should be disgusted and horrified just yet either until they have asked their son about it. If you jump straight disgusted and horrified before corroborating the accusation then that is something more about you than the accused. Its innocent UNTIL proved guilty. I don’t doubt the OP’s veracity but can I be certain, investigate first, condemn later! We know it don’t like that in the real world but it’s what it should be.
Lmfao dance momma you deff are vicariously living through your teen
She actually made a second post because no one agreed with her on the first
2nd Story: Why is the new employee staring at OP while he's eating his banana? The new person is the one with the problem. Sad, but this is the reason I don't consume bananas in public. If I do, I break it off or have it pre-sliced. One too many creepy stares did the trick.
Stalker story: People like him usually don't stop unless they get either badly scared or badly hurt or both. I read a comment on something like this where a girl was being harassed by a guy and nothing was being done. But she had some relatives from out of state and they paid him a visit. They didn't kill him or even hurt him that badly (since he could still walk). But the guy moved away immediately afterwards and never contacted her again.
Story 1. The father's reaction is so ridiculous. For the record, a quilt made by a MAN won best in show in the huge quilt competition in Pigeon Forge, TN this year. Needlework is not gender defined. Also, NTA. Those people only care about their image
A number of famous American football players are well known knitters. They consider it relaxing. I doubt that dad would say that to the face of some guy built like a tank.
I have 3 framed needle work pieces on my wall that were made by my grandfather for my grandmother when they were engaged. He was in the merchant marine and then the navy. He took up needlepoint for something to do in the long hours he was off duty on the ships.
With some of these stereotypes, who knows where they came from. Between knitting, men not being allowed to cook or able to clean... just why? I doubt any religious texts say anything like "thou shalt not knit".
Story 1: Absolutely NTA and don't even consider getting them something else. I love all the handmade items and even hand me downs my family and in-laws made/ gave me. Their response to "not the right color" was super immature and entitled. I appreciated all gifts even when not on the registry. There's always something someone forgets to add or didn't consider.
I do want to say however to those who say it's entitled to put big ticket items on a registry maybe it's just me but I expect all baby needs big and small on a registry. Most of those bigger items are meant to be used by all the kids so it's a one time buy. For most reasonable people they will just buy whatever is left over for themselves. I know in my family people would pull together for a big ticket item and no one had a problem with that. I certainly never expected one person to buy me something like a stroller or carseat it would be like a 2-5 person item so that people were spending like $50 at best. Like I said I never expected it but was more than appreciative if someone did.
Languages won’t help OP’s daughter in life? Yes she’d get by with English okay but knowing other languages would hugely help her with jobs. Holy moly. I wish I had that much of a love for languages. Maybe she’ll be a linguist or something too. 😮
I never saw a "list" for presents in all the baby showers I have been to. Surprise gifts are part of the fun. Two or three people would pool money to get big ticket items. Common sense.
Story 1. Family is insane!
They have a lot of nerve demanding a specific gift for a damn baby shower. I don't even like a registry for a wedding. But that's me . I put a lot of thought into gifts that I give.
It's hard enough for dancers with their whole heart in it to make a career- if she can't give it her all it's pointless to keep pushing.
When I was pregnant with my son I didn’t have a baby shower or gift registry. Honestly hate baby showers and the games. Me and my parents bought most of what my son needed. Everyone else gave what they could or what felt right for them. At the time, my son was the fifth generation and each one before him made him a blanket. He’ll be 10 this summer and I still have them all. Everything else I donated or gave away as soon as he grew out of it. Those blankets were from the heart and even more special now that my great-grandmother has passed.
That's an amazing legacy.
I just crochet a blanket send from Indiana to Utah to my brother for my new niece. Both my brother and his partner love it
Story 1: NTA. Honestly all the baby showers that I've been to (I'm from a Mexican background) had no registry. I didn't even know they were a thing until a few years ago. It honestly sounds very entitled, but it might be a cultural difference. I can't imagine demanding gifts for a baby that YOU chose to bring into the world fully knowing how expensive kids are.
When you receive a gift, you say thank you. You be gracious.
You do not make demands. You do not get to tell others what to spend on you.
You are grateful that someone went out of their way for you and you appreciate it.
That's not just good manners - that's comment sense!
Baby Gift Story: I've always felt it should be the responsibility of the expecting parents to provide big ticket items for themselves. If they need to rely on others to provide essentials such as a crib, baby furniture, a stroller or other high end items, they aren't prepared to have a child and they shouldn't do so. The moral of the story here being "stop having children when you can't afford them!"
Amen! (I am not religious but amen says it better than any other word.) Wait until you are ready financially and emotionally before having children. It is taxing, requires patience, and emotional maturity to do it right. There are already too many people in the world. And it is a 24/7 and 365 days a year job. That couple is not ready for parenthood if they act like brats about shower gifts.
The SIL is obviously not mature enough to be a mother if she rejected a hand knitted blanket. 🤦♀️
Regarding story one... OP is not the Ahole! During a period of financial difficulty when he could not afford an expensive gift from "The Registry" OP created a handcrafted piece that took many hours of hard work. Entitled SIL said "Wrong color. Not good enough. Go into debt and get me somethin I want!!!" A couple (/s) of issues here: In my life experience most expectant mothers are overjoyed just with diapers and baby wipes or gift cards for same, because most know those are the biggest ongoing expense for the baby. Also: as a fairly respected crafts person myself, some have the attitude that hand made, no matter what the quality or effort, are worthless in relation to store bought, even if the store is Walmart.
When I had my oldest daughter my husband’s (boyfriend at the time) neighbor made my daughter a baby blanket, I still have that blanket. It went through my daughter, my two sons and my two grandsons.
Op out here devouring bananas to slow jams lmao
I love hand knitted or crocheted blankets! My sister knits and crochets and I cherished every item she made for my kids!
The story about the smashed xbox and step sibling drama
Bio-mom needs to disclose information about everyone she allows around the kid because the only explanation for acting like that is that the kid has experienced some kind of trauma.
My sister crochets, and I paid her over $100 for a blanket. THey are excellent gifts.
Story 1 NTA.
We got nothing off of our registry when my first was born, we didn’t get mad or anything we said thank you and bought everything that we needed because at the end of the day we chose to have the baby so we chose to pay for what we need. It was no one else’s responsibility.
Story 1 In the first place the parents have a nerve expecting expensive items from a registered. Secondly there is nothing wrong with a man knitting. My ex husband can crochet. A hand knitted blanket is usually welcome as a gift for a baby. OP sil was extremely rude.
The mother who refuses to allow her daughter to quit dance classes to take languages is really ignorant. OP's assertion that learning languages is unnecessary is unbelievable. It is always an advantage if you can speak another language.
Gotta love entitled snobs and their gift registries.
Aweeeeee I would have loved a hand knitted blanket. I felt blessed by any gift given for my daughter
last story I know what make him smash a xbox n tv his parents saying no when a kid act out I find it funny that the try so hard to blame the dad when he give his kid conquences.
I've knitted for many years, and it _STILL_ takes me about 40 hours to make a generously-sized baby blanket. As I've RARELY even received a sincere "thank you," let alone, perhaps a kind gesture, anything as "strenuous" as an e'mailed photo of the baby WITH the blanket. I now refuse to make any more. Screw 'em!
At one time I knitted not only a blanket, but also matching sweater, booties, and cap, all in a lace stitch, for the grandchild of my DH's cousin who happened to be born on my Husband's birthday. I "WAS" thanked very graciously in person, but the mother also, ON HER OWN INITIATIVE, repeatedly promised photos of the baby wearing the outfit. Never heard from the mother again. Several years later the mother started sneaking off with her SIL's husband (her husband's sister's spouse), so they broke up TWO families with a total of OVER 10 kids between them! (Not too surprisingly, these people were *ALL **_VERY_* outspoken, "Fundamentalist Christians," of the "holier than you sect.") I was NOT impressed. All was not lost, however, as I had purchased a lifelike baby doll, dressed it in the outfit, then photographed it with the knitted pieces, so I, at least, have a visual reminder of all that work I had done - with love.
That is impressive. I still have the blankets my mom made me and my father's in laws made me.
If I were to go on say, Etsy, and tried to find a handmade knitted blanket it would cost me at least $100. This is justifiable, knitting takes forever and it is a skill I know I lack. Plus aren't most registries set up with the understanding that you're probably not going to be getting all your high-cost gifts? You just sort of putting them on there to put them on there? Like you might get it, or it gives people a chance to contribute as a group to a larger gift? But a handmade gift that took hours and was done just for my baby? That is priceless.
Story 1: Whatever happened to the days when people were grateful for gifts, no matter how small or inexpensive☹️
A long time ago, I knitted a baby blanket for a co-worker. She was thrilled with it. Several years later, we were talking and she said her son still had the blanket and was keeping it for when he had his own child! WOW!🥲💕
"When the hell did a 14 year old learn that phrase"
She is truly the most foolish parent ever... She ignores her daughter's wishes so hard that she doesn't understand how her linguist daughter learned a word or "phrase"
Let that sink in!
First story...NTA. You gave a gift. They didnt like it and gave it back. Not your problem.
Our family prefers hand made items as gifts as they show the personal effort put forth. And some really nice “stuff” has been produced over the years. And the associated memories.
Men Knitting. Rosie Greer, former NFL linebacker, was noted for his needlepoint and knitting. He as very good at it.