Adum & Pals: Abduction

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  • Опубликовано: 2 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 1 тыс.

  • @stevencoffin328
    @stevencoffin328 3 года назад +3682

    "I'm in the hospital."
    "I'm gay."
    "I'm a wolf"
    Typical furry problems

    • @brandonmorel2658
      @brandonmorel2658 3 года назад +134

      " the fur suit's zipper is stuck" problem is always forgotten.

    • @NotOnLand
      @NotOnLand 3 года назад +99

      "And I'm new in town"

    • @Trazyn_The_Finite
      @Trazyn_The_Finite 3 года назад +36

      @@liamdude5722 That sounds more like a solution

    • @notscotthenson
      @notscotthenson 3 года назад +20

      @@NotOnLand My man

    • @blastortoise
      @blastortoise 3 года назад +18

      Not all furries are gay, but a lot of wolf furrys are gay or bi

  • @zisnotabird610
    @zisnotabird610 3 года назад +449

    “Send my hate mail to my grave.” Is such a powerful fucking phrase to have in an Adum and Pals

  • @jakek1735
    @jakek1735 3 года назад +853

    The "I'll kill all your friends on Facebook" line is so hilarious. Like, I'd love to watch the bad guy figure out how to get away with going to a couple hundred random teenagers' houses and individually murdering all of them. And, like, he has to fly to Chicago to kill some random girl who Taylor friended after meeting once during a vacation, or something.

    • @catqueensina
      @catqueensina 2 года назад +137

      And the guy in Chile that he met on Xbox live.

    • @fatty1040
      @fatty1040 2 года назад +86

      @@catqueensina and the indian guy commenting on photos then sending messages 😂

    • @ProjectRedfoot
      @ProjectRedfoot 2 года назад +14

      And how would the gvt not catch on to that pattern before he finished? Lol

    • @briankaslewicz6130
      @briankaslewicz6130 2 года назад +31

      Taylor Lautner: *friends Obama on FB* git gud lmao

    • @DeathnoteBB
      @DeathnoteBB 2 года назад +5

      @@ProjectRedfoot How would they? But also like… he can just unfriend people. And then friend randos if he was evil.

  • @dhorinfireheart99
    @dhorinfireheart99 3 года назад +823

    This movie was quite a big deal in Sweden, because of the guy that played “Kozlow”, Michael Nyqvist- it was supposed to be his jump to Hollywood fame after the success of the OG Swedish “Girl With The Dragon Tattoo”-movies so a lot of people watched it here, he came to be in international movies like John Wick, Mission Impossible... Sadly he passed away 4 years ago, a real Swedish legendary actor, R.I.P. Michael, you’re awesome💖

    • @squeegeemcgee
      @squeegeemcgee 3 года назад +10

      was surprised to see him in this movie. loved his performances in the Millennium trilogy

    • @lukess.s
      @lukess.s 3 года назад +3

      Tillsammans is an amazing movie

    • @mckenzie.latham91
      @mckenzie.latham91 3 года назад +9

      he was actually a really good bad guy in this film, so was Jason Issacs with his American accent.

    • @TheDrLeviathan
      @TheDrLeviathan 3 года назад +2

      Oh, ouch. I thought he looked familiar. RIP

    • @dhorinfireheart99
      @dhorinfireheart99 3 года назад +3

      @@misanthropicservitorofmars2116 it was torn down by critics here haha 😆 but everyone still went to see it, so the crowd was a mix of Michael fans and fans from the Twilight series

  • @catendway4754
    @catendway4754 3 года назад +1222

    Lily Collin’s character is basically the self insert OC/reader who the author shoves in as a tag along just for the added romantic scenes they wrote

    • @jdunnatl
      @jdunnatl 3 года назад +123

      Actually, not true. At one point she...well there's....what about when.....
      Yeah, pretty much.

    • @patrickkelmer6290
      @patrickkelmer6290 3 года назад +8

      I was thinking the same!

    • @PlatinumAltaria
      @PlatinumAltaria 3 года назад +54

      Male self-insert: nerd loser who gets the supermodel high-schooler
      Female self-insert: supermodel high-schooler with two other supermodels fawning over her

    • @k.morningstar7983
      @k.morningstar7983 3 года назад +45

      when i realized was going to be in most of this movie i let out a sigh
      gotta make sure Taylor has a proven case of the notgays

    • @mqfii8992
      @mqfii8992 3 года назад +6

      @@k.morningstar7983 Which In a lot of times Is omega gay.

  • @carter_lovejoy
    @carter_lovejoy 3 года назад +2286

    You guys should do the Fifty Shades trilogy since the books were essentially based off of the author’s shitty Twilight fan fiction she wrote on her Blackberry phone (lol)! Also, you guys should do Sharkboy and Lavagirl if you guys plan on doing more Taylor Lautner movies!

    • @brandonerickson5753
      @brandonerickson5753 3 года назад +54

      ^^ this please, those movies are hilariously bad

    • @klg9549
      @klg9549 3 года назад +112

      @Chad Thunder "an adaption of a porn fantasy for women who love dominant and rich men"
      More like "controlling, abusive rich men" ...
      I wouldn't say "most women" are into that

    • @magicalgirlmel3289
      @magicalgirlmel3289 3 года назад +53

      @@klg9549 Agreed! Like, people gloss over what a controlling and abusive asshole his is because "Hurr durr woman movie bad" Like, it's certainly not my fantasy. In fact, Dan Olson's trilogy of videos on the films are a wonderful look at them.

    • @Simonporter89
      @Simonporter89 3 года назад +108

      @Chad Thunder They're a sexless woman's idea of BDSM. The entire dynamic is completely off compared to a real dom/sub relationship.
      In reality, the sub dictates the terms and the dom knows and respects the established limits. The entire experience is based on trust or else it doesn't work.

    • @punkcuck
      @punkcuck 3 года назад +18

      You can’t write a screenplay on your fucking telephone!

  • @grantbitman1448
    @grantbitman1448 3 года назад +467

    Regarding the Jaimie Lee Curtis/ Sigourney Weaver problem that Adam had. I read a paper in college about blocking words. From what I can remember: Your brain, when going through the process of recalling a word, will very quickly go through a process of throwing out words and stopping at the correct one. Now acknowledging the correct word, your brain puts a shunt on recollection and moves on to whatever problem solving function it was heading toward. That correct word is the "blocking word." Rarely, the brain will recognize an incorrect word as the blocking word, and it will not allow you to go back to the process of recollection. You'll know it's wrong, but it will persist as the word your looking for. Adam started with Jaimie (Lee Curtis), and then couldn't recall the name of an actress he definitely knew.
    I could be wrong. It was a while ago since I read the paper, and I'm not a psychologist.

    • @LunarShimmer
      @LunarShimmer 3 года назад +42

      Interesting. I get her mixed up with Susan Sarandon, for different reasons (similar hair, character types, both first names start with S...) but I've definitely experienced this too, cool to know where it comes from

    • @tomchillen3039
      @tomchillen3039 3 года назад +11

      My balls, grant

    • @brookejon3695
      @brookejon3695 3 года назад +8

      I experience this exact process on a daily basis, and I can say it's accurate to my brain function.

    • @PointsofData
      @PointsofData 2 года назад +25

      It sounds like something that our brain would do. It's sturdily built but takes many, many shortcuts when it comes to shit we don't need to survive.
      Bastard.

    • @grantbitman1448
      @grantbitman1448 2 года назад +10

      @@PointsofData Wait. Did you call me a bastard, or the human brain? Either way, you are correct.

  • @brandonmorel2658
    @brandonmorel2658 3 года назад +1001

    This is like Taken but with a Taylor Lautner that has Oedipus Complex, really avant garde.

    • @Oh_oh_its_Magic
      @Oh_oh_its_Magic 3 года назад +17

      Don't forget a bit of Jason Bourne esq Mystique as well lol

    • @brandonmorel2658
      @brandonmorel2658 3 года назад +3

      @@makeitthrough_ Also a little sprinkle of Decker's suave.

    • @obiwankenobi9141
      @obiwankenobi9141 Год назад +3

      @@brandonmorel2658 sushi, that’s what my wife called me.

    • @akirasuzami9847
      @akirasuzami9847 Год назад +1

      I want to make an Œdi-puss joke, but I don’t know where to make it.

  • @NikoJr.
    @NikoJr. 3 года назад +335

    At first I thought this movie would be cool, because finding out your parents abducted you at a young age is a really interesting concept with lots of nuances to explore.
    And then it got stupid

    • @ryanfeller5765
      @ryanfeller5765 2 года назад +13

      I know it turned into your basic “on the run” action movie but it could’ve been so much cooler!

    • @yellinghayfire4935
      @yellinghayfire4935 2 года назад +9

      Same here I remember watching the trailer and actually being interested in the drama of being a kidnapped child who had no idea. It's a very intriguing concept and ripe for poignant drama.
      Then it suddenly turned into an action movie. Glad to see I didn't miss anything by judging it from the trailer.

    • @MegCazalet
      @MegCazalet Год назад +1

      It’s an updated form of “The Face on the Milk Carton”.

    • @basementdwellercosplay
      @basementdwellercosplay 10 месяцев назад +4

      There are real people who found out they were abducted as baby, so making a biopic like movie won't be hard just don't make it into an action movie

  • @gregjayonnaise8314
    @gregjayonnaise8314 3 года назад +1845

    Weird fact: IRL Taylor Lautner’s parents are both white with German, French and Dutch ancestry, although with distant Native American roots.
    The craziest shit Twilight has done is convince the world that Taylor Lautner is actually full-blooded Native American.

    • @madlie2452
      @madlie2452 3 года назад +318

      Ikr?! He’s literally so white and looks anything but. Genetics are weird.

    • @joinsideke
      @joinsideke 3 года назад +281

      @@madlie2452 I'm more native than he is and I'm pale as fuck. It's not fair.

    • @SpamEggSausage
      @SpamEggSausage 3 года назад +3

      not the world, just people dumb enough to be Twilight fans

    • @donm1719
      @donm1719 3 года назад +61

      Wait he’s white ? There’s no way lol

    • @madlie2452
      @madlie2452 3 года назад +163

      @@donm1719 Yep. Both of his parents are white. And I know you’ll wanna say the mom cheated but Taylor look just like his dad but tan.

  • @philljustphill1656
    @philljustphill1656 3 года назад +623

    People who are into bikes and cars know what it's like to have a project car/bike you're always fixing but somehow never get done. It's mostly for therapeutic reasons. No need to rush it, just fix the car and process the complexities of life, like imprinting on cgi demon babies and being allergic to shirts...

    • @PlatinumAltaria
      @PlatinumAltaria 3 года назад +55

      People will do anything except go to therapy smh.

    • @luismarioguerrerosanchez4747
      @luismarioguerrerosanchez4747 3 года назад +2

      @@PlatinumAltaria lol

    • @lillieampurra
      @lillieampurra 3 года назад +16

      @@PlatinumAltaria who needs therapy when you have a coping method? /j

    • @luismarioguerrerosanchez4747
      @luismarioguerrerosanchez4747 3 года назад +1

      @@lillieampurra Someone who wants to confront and solve their problems instead of ignoring them?

    • @DeathnoteBB
      @DeathnoteBB 3 года назад +13

      @@luismarioguerrerosanchez4747 You gonna pay for the therapy? You gonna help them find a decent therapist? No? Then let hem fix a fucking motorcycle

  • @Zulf85
    @Zulf85 3 года назад +607

    "suddenly everyone around me is dying, Karen" is a truly prophetic line

    • @someidiot420
      @someidiot420 2 года назад +32

      me pleading with the customer to wear a mask for 10 goddamn minutes

    • @tadpolegaming4510
      @tadpolegaming4510 2 года назад

      @@someidiot420 we will not

  • @jdunnatl
    @jdunnatl 3 года назад +782

    "Asking me to know this white woman is LITERALLY violence." 😆

    • @SkyTheStarhero
      @SkyTheStarhero 3 года назад +22

      Oh my god such a mood every video

    • @anomolouscow3761
      @anomolouscow3761 3 года назад +1

      As soon as I read this, that moment happened

    • @JustKrin
      @JustKrin 3 года назад +6

      Said the manager at the store when a Karen asks her if they know who she is

  • @Connorthecatsdad
    @Connorthecatsdad 3 года назад +242

    Can we imagine the version of this movie where instead of Karen being randomly assigned to him, fucking Kyle the tech nerd or Brent the linebacker got paired and this turned into a buddy comedy crime thriller?

    • @shanestevens5352
      @shanestevens5352 2 года назад +53

      I think that sounds like a much better movie

  • @ProgPro96
    @ProgPro96 3 года назад +274

    I wonder if the teacher ever realized that him giving out that assignment got multiple people killed

    • @AlanJS00
      @AlanJS00 Год назад +6

      We’ll never know

  • @TheZenMaster420
    @TheZenMaster420 3 года назад +349

    I don't know how much time goes into editing these Adum and Pals episodes, but I am extremely thankful. One of my favorite things to watch on the internet. MOAR.

    • @donm1719
      @donm1719 3 года назад +8

      It does look like it takes ages, adum goes hella extra n still get sht done, if he had like another job like retail or sum sht there’s no way he’s able to release these quite often..

    • @ebag245
      @ebag245 3 года назад +1

      @@donm1719 check out his twitch, it does take forever lmao u get to watch the whole process. It's pretty much everday too it's fun

    • @donm1719
      @donm1719 3 года назад

      @@ebag245 ahh ok that’s pretty cool night pop in or watch a previous stream! I’ve seen him post like 4-6 hour videos which is insane

    • @renatenha
      @renatenha 2 года назад

      Same.

    • @1WEareBUFO1
      @1WEareBUFO1 2 года назад

      I had to rent breaking dawn just to line it up with how fuckin' hilarious the commentary was. I just HAD to see the details for myself, even knowing how preposterous the end gets.

  • @ericramirez521
    @ericramirez521 3 года назад +183

    I feel like with every other Adum & Pals I was able to understand the basic plot but I have no idea what was happening in this one

    • @chinsaw2727
      @chinsaw2727 3 года назад +18

      Read the synopsis on Wikipedia, and it’s honestly a mess

    • @etalex7074
      @etalex7074 3 года назад +17

      I watched the entire thing with their commentary and still have no idea

    • @lezard2102
      @lezard2102 3 года назад +37

      Taylor Lautner is being chased by (generic mafia/CIA agency/abusive parent) because he (is a murder witness/has a pendrive with confidential information/stole something) and in the process they murder (his girlfriend/his family/his dog) so now he (seeks revenge/seeks the truth/seeks to escape).
      Combine any of these generic trope options and you have every Taylor Lautner movie after Twilight.

    • @itsmesnacks
      @itsmesnacks 3 года назад +11

      this and the lady in the water are both extremely confusing lmao

    • @zombiecarnivore
      @zombiecarnivore 3 года назад +26

      You say that while I know who killed me is one of their videos.

  • @CaptainCFAngi
    @CaptainCFAngi 3 года назад +489

    I always watch the Adum and Pals version before the commentary, it’s like watching the trailer right before the full movie

    • @Magicalnora
      @Magicalnora 3 года назад +12

      This is my first time going the full commentary
      Makes me appreciate the editor too ✨✨

    • @cujo2680
      @cujo2680 3 года назад +3

      I never watch the full thing. I like the curated version.

  • @comixproviderftw_02
    @comixproviderftw_02 3 года назад +1408

    In another life, Taylor Lautner could’ve been Batman.

    • @commenter_HIMIK-MAN
      @commenter_HIMIK-MAN 3 года назад +143

      Imagine him being a joker in the next batman movie. We'd come full circle.

    • @comixproviderftw_02
      @comixproviderftw_02 3 года назад +68

      @@commenter_HIMIK-MAN I prefer Kristen Stewart, only because of how even more funny it would. Especially since there’s people out there who are campaigning that.

    • @commenter_HIMIK-MAN
      @commenter_HIMIK-MAN 3 года назад +40

      @@comixproviderftw_02 I actually wanted to say Robin, i dunno why i said Joker. Altho that would he pretty funny too.

    • @shawklan27
      @shawklan27 3 года назад +2

      Jesus.

    • @Bluargh02
      @Bluargh02 3 года назад +3

      Oh god no

  • @jacobwilliams1223
    @jacobwilliams1223 2 года назад +61

    I'll say this, the fact Taylor's character actually broke his ankle off that stunt in the third act is a level of realism I would not have expected from this.

  • @solidsnake2085
    @solidsnake2085 4 месяца назад +42

    RIP Scoot, I just rewatched this one on Friday because you made some of the funniest jokes on this video.

    • @Vosiss
      @Vosiss 4 месяца назад +6

      These videos really won't be the same without him 😞

    • @InJuRiOuSbEaTs95
      @InJuRiOuSbEaTs95 18 дней назад +4

      Holy shit. It’s already been three months. Fuck man. 😢

  • @anya.stasiaaa0072
    @anya.stasiaaa0072 3 года назад +166

    "send my hate mail to my grave" -- new epitaph just dropped, who's gonna use it

    • @immaleaf4964
      @immaleaf4964 3 года назад +1

      wait. So they have to read your grave to know to send the mail to it? So that headstone isn't your grave? Can they not just leave the mail there when they read it

    • @anya.stasiaaa0072
      @anya.stasiaaa0072 3 года назад +8

      @@immaleaf4964 turn your death into a choose your own adventure/logistical nightmare for your country's postal system, people'll really remember who you are

    • @immaleaf4964
      @immaleaf4964 3 года назад +6

      @@anya.stasiaaa0072 I'll make every address the circus

    • @ThreadBomb
      @ThreadBomb 3 года назад +8

      "Here lies Adam Johnston. No junk mail."

    • @untrustworthybagel
      @untrustworthybagel 4 месяца назад

      Scoot

  • @crazyjedi5994
    @crazyjedi5994 3 года назад +460

    Sigourney sounds more like an adjective than a name.

    • @samharold9022
      @samharold9022 3 года назад +133

      “Muhammad Ali, bobbing and ducking out of the way of Foreman’s punches, he truly is a Sigourney Weaver”

    • @flowerpowerworld
      @flowerpowerworld 3 года назад +6

      @@samharold9022 omg 😂

    • @Sm0k3turt
      @Sm0k3turt 2 года назад +2

      She’s not bad but it’s so funny that her name is so weird

    • @scottsmith3804
      @scottsmith3804 2 года назад +1

      I think I was so drunk I watched this twice and I was confused why this was even in an “Adam doesn’t like” that I forgot miss ELLEN RIPLEY was her lmao

  • @BenDiPaolo
    @BenDiPaolo 3 года назад +155

    Fun Fact: One of Lily Collins's very first auditions was for Bella Swan in Twilight

    • @darwincity
      @darwincity 2 года назад +9

      Let me guess: her father did not think he could write good enough songs for the soundtrack.

  • @raicrush
    @raicrush 3 года назад +586

    If a mom came into the room and asked her son if he wanted the door open or closed and he said closed, while I'm only there to do a group project, I would be terrified I was going to get raped.

    • @skinnysnorlax1876
      @skinnysnorlax1876 3 года назад +69

      Honestly, I would think that the mom knew what her son was going to do, and allowed it or was even into it.

    • @ThreadBomb
      @ThreadBomb 3 года назад +103

      After the door closed, you'd expect to hear the key turn in the lock.

    • @donm1719
      @donm1719 3 года назад +8

      I don’t think that’s how it works

    • @raicrush
      @raicrush 3 года назад +111

      @@skinnysnorlax1876 The way he said “Closed it, please,” was so ominous 😂😂😂. Along with the way Lily Collins looked so scared when he said it. Like hello?

    • @runningcommentary2125
      @runningcommentary2125 3 года назад +87

      "Ah, hello. You must be the mother of my grandchildren."
      "No, actually I'm here for the school project-"
      "No, really, you MUST be the mother of my grandchildren."

  • @fromvault801
    @fromvault801 3 года назад +175

    Its from the director of Boyz N Tha Hood so Lautner now has street cred & could join any gang

    • @carter_lovejoy
      @carter_lovejoy 3 года назад +42

      It’s crazy how John Singleton (RIP) went from making Boyz n the Hood to making a shitty action movie starring Taylor Lautner 20 years after that. This looks like it could’ve been directed by some generic no-name director who makes shitty B-rated action movies (a majority of them being direct to VOD).

    • @luismarioguerrerosanchez4747
      @luismarioguerrerosanchez4747 3 года назад +13

      @@carter_lovejoy I mean, he made 2 Fast 2 Furious. He sold out rather quickly.

    • @carter_lovejoy
      @carter_lovejoy 3 года назад +1

      @@luismarioguerrerosanchez4747 yeah, eventually.

    • @luismarioguerrerosanchez4747
      @luismarioguerrerosanchez4747 3 года назад +6

      @@carter_lovejoy It's actually very sad. I genuinely found Boyz 'n' the Hood to be one of the best directorial debuts out there and one of the greatest films ever made; but everything he made after it was plain shite.

    • @superdrinkingpepsi
      @superdrinkingpepsi 3 года назад +4

      @@luismarioguerrerosanchez4747 2 Fast 2 Furious is a cinematic masterpiece I will not accept such slander

  • @OneTopic
    @OneTopic 3 года назад +215

    Maybe it’s *because* the chairs flip up that the other guy found the gun!
    I’ve cracked the code

  • @sonlen796
    @sonlen796 3 года назад +200

    I'd love to see you guys tackle Riverdale since you already did 13 Reasons Why.

    • @etalex7074
      @etalex7074 3 года назад +5

      How much Riverdale is there?

    • @jacknapier8201
      @jacknapier8201 3 года назад +33

      @@etalex7074 too much

    • @itsmesnacks
      @itsmesnacks 3 года назад +2

      @@etalex7074 6 seasons apparently??

    • @corenlavolpe6143
      @corenlavolpe6143 2 года назад +9

      Oh I know it gets so fucking insane they would have the best time ever

  • @crlyhdedfnck
    @crlyhdedfnck 3 года назад +96

    I'm dedicating my whole life to becoming a filmmaker to bring back Taylor Lautner

  • @thekrakenexperiment280
    @thekrakenexperiment280 3 года назад +128

    I would love to see them review Sharkboy & Lavagirl if they do another Taylor Lautner film.

  • @phothewin6019
    @phothewin6019 3 года назад +141

    If this were Synecdoche, New York, you would've given this a 10/10.

    • @FlameHidden
      @FlameHidden 3 года назад +19

      If X was Y I would also Z

    • @c.9345
      @c.9345 2 года назад +4

      If man was woman Finkle would be Einhorn

  • @jackbennersmoviereviews
    @jackbennersmoviereviews 3 года назад +75

    Totally forgot about this movie until this uploaded. I remember back in 2011 thinking this looked like a Bourne ripoff action film with Taylor Lautner.

    • @raicrush
      @raicrush 3 года назад +2

      I forgot it and Taylor's other weird action movie existed until a channel called Kennie J.D. covered how bad they are lol

  • @SonicHaXD
    @SonicHaXD 3 года назад +542

    I think eating a meal provided by the CIA, then still being able to run away. Is way to fking hilarious XD

    • @mckenzie.latham91
      @mckenzie.latham91 3 года назад +47

      I know right, that meal would have been laced with at least 3 different types of tranquilizers and or sleeping draughts

    • @eyegrinder94
      @eyegrinder94 3 года назад +13

      @@mckenzie.latham91 You'd be lucky if they didn't put like 1000ug of acid in your coke then just watch you run around freaking the fuck out.

    • @steamedhamlet
      @steamedhamlet 2 года назад +1

      Fancy seeing you here!

    • @ganon2682
      @ganon2682 2 года назад +2

      I love you

    • @guthax30
      @guthax30 2 года назад +3

      Usually when that happens you end up with total amnesia wandering around the desert with weird scars on your neck and someone else's pass-port in your pocket.

  • @66Roses
    @66Roses 3 года назад +63

    People who cared about their Facebook friends in 2011: Teenagers and University Students
    People who care about their Facebook friends in 2021: People ages 50+

  • @Jeffy_the_J
    @Jeffy_the_J 3 года назад +236

    New adum and pals I have the motivation to live another day.

    • @doubtfulhenry
      @doubtfulhenry 3 года назад +7

      Gotta take em' where ya find em'

    • @thebondofunity
      @thebondofunity 3 года назад +2

      Same. Feels like forever in-between them lol

    • @banessuperbrutalmetalfunti2561
      @banessuperbrutalmetalfunti2561 3 года назад +1

      Hopefully the thrill from this video will keep me going until Elden Ring gets released.

  • @babyBELUGAr
    @babyBELUGAr 3 года назад +41

    In a perfect world, an Adum & Pals video would exist for every single movie and show

  • @kingauthor1735
    @kingauthor1735 3 года назад +55

    *WE WERE SAYING HE WAS BETTER THAN EDWARD WE DIDNT SAY HE WAS GOOD*

  • @STOCKHOLM07
    @STOCKHOLM07 3 года назад +151

    This is literally the only way I'd ever watch Abduction

  • @TheMaddJon
    @TheMaddJon 3 года назад +44

    Dude gets thrown out of a train window, fucking dabs on the way out. What a champ

  • @kuribayashi84
    @kuribayashi84 3 года назад +128

    _"[Taylor Lautner] can't carry a movie any more than Abigail Breslin can carry a refrigerator."_
    - R. Kurt Oselund of Slate Magazine
    That about sums it up.
    Also, that John Singleton's directorial career had to end on this note is kinda sad.

    • @lezard2102
      @lezard2102 3 года назад +9

      holy fuck i did not know. this is depressing

    • @user-lb9xw4xf2q
      @user-lb9xw4xf2q 3 года назад +9

      If it helps, he did direct some TV stuff later. Though, I guess Abduction was last feature.

  • @dinsism
    @dinsism 3 года назад +32

    After watching this, it made me realise that Michael Nyqvist played the role of the villain in 3 films- Abduction, Mission Impossible:Ghost Protocol and John Wick.
    Rip to that man.

  • @shinyagumon7015
    @shinyagumon7015 3 года назад +56

    The thing that I just realized is that the title is completely misleading!
    Nobody gets really abducted, Taylor's character was left voluntarily by his birth parents and the rest of the plot features exactly 0 abductions.

  • @ZombiiChix
    @ZombiiChix 3 года назад +176

    You absolutely need to talk about Ridiculous 6. Lautner plays an inbred hillbilly streotype. It's pretty painful lol

    • @Geospasmic
      @Geospasmic 3 года назад +23

      I watched about 20 minutes of that, his character was the only vaguely funny thing about it. At least he was trying.

    • @k.morningstar7983
      @k.morningstar7983 3 года назад +6

      i feel like that movie is actively pissing on the legacy of *Blazing Saddles*

    • @Geospasmic
      @Geospasmic 3 года назад +13

      @@k.morningstar7983 or worse, trying to ape it. People who like this kind of thing probably think the racial slurs are what make Blazing Saddles funny. I feel bad for the Native actors who had to say that horrible dialogue.

    • @k.morningstar7983
      @k.morningstar7983 3 года назад +6

      @@Geospasmic you mean as opposed to how in *Saddles* we're supposed to be laughing AT the racist townfolk and the Klan, right?

    • @Geospasmic
      @Geospasmic 2 года назад

      @@k.morningstar7983 exactly, their prejudice is what makes them stupid.

  • @deafgwipps
    @deafgwipps 4 месяца назад +43

    Dude rest in peace Scott :(( these hit different now

    • @shrek9274
      @shrek9274 Месяц назад

      What happened

    • @deafgwipps
      @deafgwipps Месяц назад

      @@shrek9274 Scott sadly passed away a couple months ago , a brain aneurysm in his sleep .

  • @Barnesofthenorth
    @Barnesofthenorth 3 года назад +307

    Honestly if I had been abducted as a child and was living in that home I'd just say fuck it this is my family now. Why risk finding your real parents who you now have to live with, only for them to be meth heads. "Yes! I no longer have to have a good education and prospects! I now sell drugs for my dad!"

    • @jdunnatl
      @jdunnatl 3 года назад +20

      That would probably be a better movie, sadly. 😄

    • @AxxLAfriku
      @AxxLAfriku 3 года назад

      I HATE people that HATE other people. The comment I respond to did not spread HATE. That is good. BUT! I get a lot of HATE comments on my amazing videos and I HATE it. Please don't start spreading HATE. Do I have to HATE you too, dear ba

    • @alpha00zero
      @alpha00zero 3 года назад +34

      That last half of your comment is pretty much the plot of Life is Strange: Before the Storm, just replace meth with heroin. Adum actually played it, it's a fucking hilarious playthru.

    • @Andrewexploded
      @Andrewexploded 3 года назад +23

      @@AxxLAfriku … Are you okay?

    • @ThreadBomb
      @ThreadBomb 3 года назад +36

      I dunno, I think you'd instantly assume that your adoptive parents were kidnappers, and stop feeling safe in their house.

  • @etzool
    @etzool 2 года назад +21

    "'cause you got SUPER ADOPTED." As someone who actually is adopted... this was absolutely hilarious. :D

  • @dnucky
    @dnucky 3 года назад +21

    *"Send my hate-mail to my grave."*
    Adam Johnston, 2021.

  • @Mclarenboy100
    @Mclarenboy100 Год назад +12

    Dumb fact: The scenes for the baseball game at 16:28 was shot on August 22, 2010, in the bottom of the third inning. You could tell as it's the Pirates facing the Mets, with Ronny Cedeno for the Pirates (#13) on first, Zach Duke in the #57 is batting and running to first base, the Mets' Ruben Tejada (#11) is covering first, and the Mets seem to be fucking up a play in the infield.
    The only season where Duke & Tejada would've faced off when they were members of those teams would be 2010. Given that Duke is a pitcher, he only played in a total of 29 games that year. Out of those 29, his only start against the Mets at PNC Park (the Pirates' home stadium) was on August 22nd. And you can tell this is the bottom of the third inning as that was the only inning that Cedeno got on base all game, and this play in particular is the 2nd out of the inning, as the Mets let Duke's pop-up bunt fall to the ground. However, as Cedeno made the mistake of going back to first, thinking the pop-up would be caught, the Mets were able to get the force out at 2nd.
    Thank BaseballReference for this btw.

    • @SnibsnBibs
      @SnibsnBibs Год назад +4

      I'll never cease to be amazed by people's ability to make baseball sound complicated as hell. I couldn't imagine following any sport closely enough to know who played how many games or what they did during particular innings. Even weirder, people have gotten in bloody barfights over this stuff. Guaranteed someone has had a chair smashed over their head because a guy 99.9% of people have never heard of and who has no relation to the victim hit a ball with a stick.
      This species is _fucked_ up.

  • @Manawolfman
    @Manawolfman 3 года назад +75

    I can only imagine over half the audience checking out over the "kill every friend on facebook" line.

  • @raicrush
    @raicrush 3 года назад +36

    I will now only refer to pregnancy as having a bomb in the oven

  • @Literally-God
    @Literally-God 3 года назад +48

    The first credit in the cast is for "CIA man"

  • @kimmykool-aid7782
    @kimmykool-aid7782 3 года назад +46

    Taylor Lautner looking more out of place in this family than that crying kid from Hereditary

  • @xXnintendorkXx
    @xXnintendorkXx 3 года назад +39

    I watched this in theaters.
    I was really bored that day and I thought Alien Lady would be in it more.

  • @tema_apercepti
    @tema_apercepti 3 года назад +51

    Correction: We're all gonna die before Adum finishes Synecdoche

  • @mizel101
    @mizel101 3 года назад +44

    So Gael's brother is the chad... I feel like that's a good Gael-Lore tidbit

  • @qualivia
    @qualivia 3 года назад +16

    "I made one tiny colossal mistake."
    I don't think you know how words work, chief.

  • @ElselchoGaming
    @ElselchoGaming 3 года назад +66

    Who's gonna tell them that the ageing technology actually exists and is actually used to find missing kids.

    • @Tdrummer888
      @Tdrummer888 3 года назад +33

      Let alone the fact reality has better aging technology lol

  • @wanderingrandomer
    @wanderingrandomer 3 года назад +25

    7:59 How are you NOT able to remember Sigourney Weaver's name? Her defining feature is how fucking weird her name is. How unique it is should make it easier to remember, surely.

    • @markiangooley
      @markiangooley 3 года назад +5

      Susan Alexandra Weaver originally. I guess Sigourney is more memorable, except in this case it isn’t.

    • @matthewcrome
      @matthewcrome 3 месяца назад

      @@markiangooley Her legal name is still Susan actually. Also how does Mr. "We should make more trailers like original Alien" does not remember her for literally ANYTHING ELSE

  • @svinjamaria
    @svinjamaria 3 года назад +23

    This movie follows like a damn fanfiction

  • @UltimateLegoFan324
    @UltimateLegoFan324 3 года назад +62

    Holy shit this played at my school and the memories are flooding back

  • @chickenpermission7557
    @chickenpermission7557 3 года назад +19

    I love how Adum couldn't remember Sigourney Weaver's name even though it was in the opening credits.

  • @mastermarkus5307
    @mastermarkus5307 2 года назад +10

    7:22 - Taylor fucking rotating into the pool from the explosion killed me.

  • @PurpleTwirler
    @PurpleTwirler 3 года назад +20

    I feel like Adventures of Shark Boy and Lava Girl would be a good Taylor Lautner movie to watch.

  • @ovahlord1451
    @ovahlord1451 3 года назад +34

    Kinda sad that this guy never made a comeback like robert pattinson

    • @PlatinumAltaria
      @PlatinumAltaria 3 года назад +12

      Team Jacob lost, now he's gonna be fed to the wolves.

    • @goingunder2548
      @goingunder2548 Год назад +9

      Honestly it's gotta suck to be propelled to fame so quickly as a teen and then drop off by the time you're in your mid-20s. It's not well studied because it isn't something that just happens to the average person but there definitely has to be some severe psychological repercussions.

  • @00KiryuZero00
    @00KiryuZero00 3 года назад +37

    Literally every expression Taylor makes is awkward, it's hilarious but it does make me wonder how anybody ever thought he would be good for a leading role lol

  • @icycrusader1947
    @icycrusader1947 2 года назад +17

    The most unrealistic thing is the amount of people at a Pirates game.

  • @iciajay6891
    @iciajay6891 3 года назад +39

    Adum struggling with Alien lady's name was adorable.

    • @Sigourneyporpoise
      @Sigourneyporpoise 3 года назад +9

      As a Sigourney, I seriously don't blame him xddd

    • @donm1719
      @donm1719 3 года назад +6

      @@Sigourneyporpoise you’re named tht too? Lol

  • @DarbyCupit
    @DarbyCupit 3 года назад +22

    "Baek baek! Ugh..."
    "Sorry, are you trying to bark?"
    "I'mma wolf, I'll show you! Awooo..."
    I don't know why this broke me so hard, but it did. XD

  • @jeremyfisher42
    @jeremyfisher42 3 года назад +13

    This commentary track unlocked the memory in my mind that I have actually seen this movie in theatres.
    What brought it all back was him passed out drunk on the grass right at the start. I guess it made an impression on me lol

    • @CANALIANMOTTA
      @CANALIANMOTTA 3 года назад

      Exactly the same for me lol
      I totally deleted this movie from my mind (thank god)

  • @johnkimani5889
    @johnkimani5889 3 года назад +18

    1:48 Missed a Wolf/Dog whistling joke opportunity guys. Best low hanging fruit.

  • @ArtsyHumanbean
    @ArtsyHumanbean 3 года назад +9

    Thank you so so much Adam. I had to stop being a patron as I balance supporting myself and family and my own hopes of creating.. my cat.. anyway I hope you know how cherished your content is to us who watch religiously, especially the pals.. you deserve all the support however we can give it as an audience, and I hope someday I can directly contribute again sometime soon!

  • @DontTouchMyCroissant
    @DontTouchMyCroissant 3 года назад +41

    It's funny they make Alfred Molina go "Get me pictures of Spiderman!" seeing as he is Doctor Octopus.

    • @Amitlu
      @Amitlu 3 года назад

      And he even owes his villain name to Jameson (in that continuity)

  • @RitzPlays
    @RitzPlays 2 года назад +8

    They did a showing of this film at my university with the director (Taylor mysteriously wasn’t there) it was very hard not to ask them why they didn’t make a better movie during the Q&A

  • @rollapoid
    @rollapoid 3 года назад +8

    honestly you guys are my favorite movie commentary group of all time

  • @torylva
    @torylva 2 года назад +24

    I hate the trope of "Bomb blows up, everyone runs, they get thrown by the explosion"
    If the explosion was powerful enough to lift you up and fling you like that, you are already dead because it also ruptured several organs and blood vessels inside of you.

    • @goingunder2548
      @goingunder2548 Год назад

      Also wouldn't the water in that swimming pool literally boil them alive if the fire was that close to it?

    • @torylva
      @torylva Год назад +1

      @@goingunder2548 Doubt it, unless the fire is really close and they stay there for hours. Water takes a long time to start boiling.
      Water is a very good heat conductor, meaning that all the swimming pool would have to be heated up. That takes a rather long time.
      It takes roughly four minutes to make two liters of water to boil over an open fire in a metal pan. An entire swimming pool would take several hours inside an inferno to bring it all to boil. Would mostly likely have evaporated a quarter of it or so before that.

  • @dizzledeng
    @dizzledeng 2 года назад +6

    I love how they have Launter ruin his ankle falling off the rail to him standing and walking normally when he was offered to live with his psychologist/counciler to him limping off in the credits

  • @AsherLogan129
    @AsherLogan129 3 года назад +25

    I always enjoy a good Adum & Pals

  • @ohspoons
    @ohspoons 2 года назад +9

    "Super adopted" and "send my hate mail to my grave" are stand outs here

  • @stillnousername9796
    @stillnousername9796 3 года назад +12

    I've inexplicably known the exact spelling to Sigourney Weaver's name ever since I watched Alien's special features or whatever at 6, it makes me irrationally angry that Adam can't do the same.

    • @YourHuckleberry99
      @YourHuckleberry99 Год назад

      I know right, I've remembered her name after I watched Alien fuckin years ago

  • @abib2204
    @abib2204 3 года назад +16

    “Send my hate mail to my grave” needs to be on a t shirt

  • @karinmaria6455
    @karinmaria6455 3 года назад +47

    I wanted to be nice and say that Taylor Lautner at least seems to be doing a better job acting than in the Twilight series and then I got to the action scene and I wanna take these thoughts back

    • @imsadlol4528
      @imsadlol4528 3 года назад +7

      at least he does a lot of his own stunts ??? that’s kinda cool

  • @ianhopkins8948
    @ianhopkins8948 3 года назад +19

    Fun fact, that river isn't muddy, it's full of iron and mine runoff
    Also, how dare they disgrace my city with this shitty film

  • @dorians.9872
    @dorians.9872 3 года назад +17

    "What if instead of Sigourney Weaver is Sugoffme weiner?"
    Nick Mullen, probably

  • @marvmarv5629
    @marvmarv5629 3 года назад +9

    A friend and I were just talking about this movie at work holy shit. Or more accurately Taylor Lautner's acting career and direction, also that editing with the Shawn meme but Nathan instead is great

  • @midnightshawarmallama4012
    @midnightshawarmallama4012 3 года назад +32

    Adum: "I love Abs-duction"

  • @ohemdoublegee
    @ohemdoublegee 3 года назад +37

    I would die for Scoot.

    • @notscotthenson
      @notscotthenson 3 года назад +13

      Prove it. Wait, I'm not supposed to say that again.

    • @ohemdoublegee
      @ohemdoublegee 3 года назад +9

      @@notscotthenson Don't tempt me with a good time ;)

    • @notscotthenson
      @notscotthenson 3 года назад +7

      @@ohemdoublegee 😽

    • @1WEareBUFO1
      @1WEareBUFO1 2 года назад +2

      Scoot would kill you for scoot. Win win

    • @notscotthenson
      @notscotthenson 2 года назад +3

      @@1WEareBUFO1 True

  • @DeadBelowZer0
    @DeadBelowZer0 3 года назад +104

    Huh, that’s weird Adum. This still isn’t a Dune review

    • @WinstonOfDojima
      @WinstonOfDojima 3 года назад +7

      Where’s your Dune review?

    • @creamwarrior
      @creamwarrior 3 года назад +7

      @@WinstonOfDojima where's yours?
      Where's mine for that matter?

    • @stephengehly2319
      @stephengehly2319 3 года назад +8

      What’s your obsession with having a Dune review? You saw it right? Are you afraid to have an opinion about it without vetting it through yms?

    • @DeadBelowZer0
      @DeadBelowZer0 3 года назад +14

      @@stephengehly2319 Obvi

    • @nettlecider
      @nettlecider 3 года назад +1

      @Mario well, but models look good aaaand that movie did indeed looked very good. I guess we can say this worked

  • @mirkiekishka
    @mirkiekishka 3 года назад +17

    Cuckoo is an ok british sitcom and Taylor is actually good in it, he found a role that really suits him. I only watched one season I think, idk how far along its now

  • @ozhin3317
    @ozhin3317 2 года назад +4

    You know at first I didn't like the whole "sit down and talk about the movie as you watch it" vibe but I swear you guys have such a weirdly attractive chemistry. You slowly sucked me in and now I'm an avid fan of this stuff.

  • @pantherbeastly3934
    @pantherbeastly3934 2 года назад +7

    I really wish we saw Taylor Lottner in more things! He's a pretty descent actor and not gonna lie, would bang 10/10.

  • @z0mb3rt
    @z0mb3rt 3 года назад +7

    Hearing Adam struggle to remember Sigourney weaver's name was what I needed today

  • @manband20
    @manband20 3 года назад +6

    Can we talk about how there was a shooting outside of a major league ballpark and nobody batted an eye?
    There was a shooting near the Phillies/Padres game this year and it sent the stadium into a panic inside. People running onto the field and into the dugout for safety. The grandstands being cleared en masse.
    In what world post-Columbine would a shooting near a fully occupied baseball stadium (something Pittsburgh hasn't seen in years) not result in general panic?

  • @mrburpler
    @mrburpler 3 года назад +10

    We're just not gonna talk about how that was Phil Collins' daughter playing "love interest" (TM)?

  • @inky_surprise
    @inky_surprise 3 года назад +11

    The makeout scene from this movie has 30 million views on youtube

  • @yukaiyami
    @yukaiyami 3 года назад +31

    Dang even with Adum and pals making funny commentary, what I saw of the movie was painfully boring. I feel bad for Taylor’s acting career.

  • @NocKme
    @NocKme 3 года назад +6

    There are laws on international waters. You are bound by the laws of a country your boat is registered. Thats why most cruise ships are registered in Panama so they don't have to pay minimum wage

  • @pencilquest9409
    @pencilquest9409 Год назад +3

    Lautner looks like the kid you'd be fine having work on the farm, but you don't wanna leave him alone in the chicken coop.

  • @jeremydandeneau7704
    @jeremydandeneau7704 5 месяцев назад +4

    Probably the most tragic part of this fiasco is this was director John Singleton’s final movie. Yes, the man who directed Poetic Justice and Boyz N the Hood. Freakin’ tragedy.

  • @MNSportsJunkie101
    @MNSportsJunkie101 2 года назад +3

    The most unrealistic thing in this movie is a sold out Pittsburgh Pirates game.

  • @bbvestieofthemagbloodaltar7665
    @bbvestieofthemagbloodaltar7665 3 года назад +17

    14:01 That was, indeed, hilarious.

    • @briankaslewicz6130
      @briankaslewicz6130 3 года назад +9

      It looked like he dabbed as he was being thrown out

    • @etalex7074
      @etalex7074 3 года назад +2

      @@briankaslewicz6130 didn’t look like it. He literally was lmfao