Husband Secretly Booked His Mom & Himself on Business Class on Our Honeymoon & Gave Me a Separate...
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- Опубликовано: 29 сен 2024
- Husband Secretly Booked His Mom & Himself on Business Class on Our Honeymoon & Gave Me a Separate Economy Ticket! So I Confronted Him in the Lounge in Front of Everyone.
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Funny how mil couldn't stand to be away from her baby boy yet still took the flight without him
Once she destroyed the marriage and god mission accomplished she dropped the rules so she could have some good time on her victory
Time for a vacation after almost destroying his marriage
Wonder if she ever called him. Ya'know, since she can't stand to be so far away from her baby, ugh
Exactly
That’s exactly what I’m thinking like wtfffc make it make senseeeeee
Absolutely horrible
I would annul (sp?) that marriage so fast!
This woman definitely threw herself down the stairs after the engagement, either to end it or put herself in the hospital and ruin the occadion
Only the latter. She's a self-centered, egotistical narcissist. They are incapable of the emotions required to end themselves. Those 'attempts', each, and every one were nothing more than manipulative stunts to coerce the outcome she wants
I cant do a long sentence but I AGREE
This screams emotional incest to me. Mom sees his husband as her husband, and op is just some side piece she has to tolerate.
A sonsband is more like it. 😒
@@danacarter9147 no...this is emotional incest...this is way more than sonsband...this is her treating her own child as her emotional partner, calling him every day and depending on him for every single thing...then whining about him leaving and abandoning her like her husband did....My MIL is the same, but luckily my fiance has cut the umbilical cord off (at least I think he did).
He’s your son, maam, not your boyfriend.
Hes her replacement husband, thats what he is to his mother
Emotional incest
True but that being said, you don’t treat anyone like that, not even your boyfriend/husband.
This is definitely emotional incest. A form of abuse that has just as much horrific impact like the actual thing.
Amen. I said that Mil is "dating" her son.
"I've never been so far away from my son" but still goes to Hawaii without her son.
My thing is, he was dumb and intentionally ignored her calls while in the lounge on his phone. He did everything behind her back. He lied to his wife. They were married for a day and he was fine with hiding and sneakingnbehind her back. Idc how much his mom had manipulated him but that was bs. Mil would have weasled her way into their room even if it was in a different hotel. Was he gonna dip out and leave op, you know his new wife, for a few hours a day to do tourist things with mommy? He was really okay intentionally not sitting next to his wife?
I see many people talking about how he's been abused, and he very clearly has, but he's also an adult and his actions and behaviors are on him. He's lucky his wife was willing to give him the chance to take action and deal with his problems. I wouldn't in that situation, and I know no one who would. I had an abusive parent, and my advice to anyone who is in a similar situation is it's not worth it. I told mine not to include me in a will, never contact my family, not to call me on their deathbed, and to make arrangements for someone to handle his remains if it matters to him since I'm his oldest kid and if they get sent to me they're going straight into the garbage.
Haven't heard from him in years, life is good.
And he admitted he knew he was wrong, but still expected and apology!? Sounds like he was okay with manipulating his wife!
@@Zarai_Numbers well he definitely got it. Honestly, it rubbed off on him too.
I never condone cheating but damn no wonder Naomi got cheated on
Yeah. I was thinking the same thing.
this is why woman should abort when the gender reveal is a boy
and this is why woman should abor t whenever the gender reveals it's a boy because men will ruin a woman then blame everything on her just how sick
seems like she became like that after the father cheated.
I also understand why this father cheated
Abuse committed against boys/men is largely ignored by society.
The guy literally never lived because of his mother and always thought that was normal. I hope he really walks away
@@thinkforyourself518 ... You're d. mb huh
@@thinkforyourself518 No duh, holy shit. EVERYONE knows abuse happens to women. This person is talking about abuse that happens to men/boys because of this specific story and how people overlook it or shift the topic back to abuse on women and you prove their point. Thank you so much for missing the point and proving it at the same time.
@@thinkforyourself518I am a woman who has lived through male violence. However my husband was also severely neglected and abused by his own mother and I think his case was significantly worse because his family expected him to just suck it up and man up because he’s a male and he ended up on the streets for it while for myself and my mother we had all kinds of local resources and family coming to our aid. Men definitely have it worse trust me.
@@thinkforyourself518 everyone knows that abuse happens to women too. In fact, abuse towards women is given way more focus while abuse towards males is largely ignored or downplayed. Your comment proved that point. Not trying to downplay the abuse towards women but the difference is there and needs to be addressed.
Statically speaking women abuse children more than man.
I was shocked when I found out this.
If I were her, I would let him and his mother go to honeymoon, and he would come back to empty house and divorce papers.
People have faults and make mistakes. Marriage is not a one way road if you’re expecting someone who will not do anything wrong you won’t find someone
@@shalommussie7883There is "doing something wrong" and there is "being absolutely bat shit crazy, manipulative and a liar", the husband is the later.
@@shalommussie7883 I hope your wife cheats on you because you encourage emotional incest and abusing wives but allowing them not to leave. And I hope you forgive her without making it an issue because "Marriage is not a one way road, everyone makes mistakes"
Op never should've married this trainwreck. She had all the red flags flying high. Even with therapy, that woman's claws are in deep. She'll always find a way in.
@@shalommussie7883 mistakes happen sure bur if you are bat shit crazy enough to not even know boundries exists smh then its never gonna work anyways. His whole family seems crazy tbh
Was anyone else’s manipulation and entitlement alarms going off on full blast? Because the amount that the mil was showing was insane. I mean, did she really think that the fact that she was the husband’s mother alone gave her a reason to control every aspect of his life? Quite frankly she deserved a harsher reality check than what she got in the end.
Flags don’t get any bigger or redder than that. This whole story was actually anger inducing.
The wedding should never have happened. OP had all the evidence she needed beforehand to walk away from this toxicity. He’s doomed for life if he doesn’t get some help to realize how manipulative his mother is. She covets her own son. Just gross.
Did... Did you not hear the rest or was there an edit after the upload because at the end there he got a therapist and goes nc with his mom
Did you watch--
...you know what, never mind.
I'm glad they got married; she saved him from that horrible woman.
Emotional incest 😢
You better keep quiet if you didn't listened to the full story
Glad he finally grew a pair and a backbone. Who the hell allows their mother to tag along on their honeymoon
I mean I get that but on the opposite side of the spectrum, my oldest brother got married about a month before he passed. Not only invited us to a traditional norse wedding but when they went on their honeymoon it was to our home town and we met up with the couple a few times for dinner and to go for a hike. In hindsight I’m glad we did because they had to cut their honeymoon short because he needed to go to the hospital
Dare I ask why MIL feels she needs to come with her son and his new wife on their HONEYMOON? Isn't that something that the newlyweds should be doing ALONE? And then husband gets business class tickets for him and his Mommy and leaves his wife in coach by herself. I would RUN if I were you, bride. With all of his mother's ridiculously silly rules, I'm surprised she allowed him to get married, let alone date this girl and propose to her.
Probably only because she wants grandchildren (whom she can also control with an iron fist just like son), and while she may wish she could give them to him (ew!) it's not socially appropriate, so enter bride. Mom would probably try to figure out a way to get them divorced and get custody of the children after.
I think putting a bit of distance between the couple and mummy was a good idea. I think they'll eventually be able to meet with her but on their own terms.
He shouldn't want to marry someone while still married to his mom
Well said. OP's marriage is not going to last very long.
Exactly
I don't think I'd ever last as long as OP did with her husband. But I'm glad that he's FINALLY getting help. My first instinct was to belittle him for his inability to stand up to his mom, but what his mom did (and continued to do) was straight-up mental and emotional abuse. She's 100% aware of it, too, as evident by her taking full advantage of his attention after her attempt to unalive herself. He doesn't deserve this kind of treatment, especially at the hands of his own mother.
We all know the business class ticket wasn’t the main issue, that’s just the breaking point of Op being disrespected time and time again. It’s the fact he always takes his mothers side despite how it’ll affect Op.
He’s not just a red flag, he’s the definition of a red flag.
That man is a walking red flag. . . . Why did you put up for this for so long?!?!?!?!?
Cuz fake story
Maybe because she love the guy and see what's going on to him. Running away from simple conversation is a walking red flag too.
There are plenty of men like this.
How is he a red flag?
You mean his mother is the one who is a red flag
The fact OP made it to the wedding dealing with this.....
14:00 “Instead I had to remain dignified so I yelled…”😂😂😂
Dignified 👌 lol
As someone whose mother is also like this, unless he’s ready to cut her off completely, she’s going to be a contact problem. These kind of mothers have so much powers over the child’s mind. I took me 25 years to finally accept that I was a victim of manipulation, physical abuse and mental abuse, and I don’t owe her anything for giving birth to me.
I would have broken it off at the engagement party this is just pure madness
maybe, but that poor man needed help. his dad didn't even know how bad it was. it takes an outsider to notice toxic stuff like that. I'm glad OP stuck it out and now her husband can finally be at peace. I had to go LC with my folks, too. It's not an easy decision, esp when you have siblings but you have to do what's best for you.
Let's have some compassion for Van and OP. Van has never gotten to fully live his life without his mother trying to influence things. He was always afraid she would harm herself, this isn't your typical case of a man being too cowardly to stand up to his mother, this man almost lost her and she held it over his head for years. How would you feel? And OP isn't stupid for staying with him and eventually saving him from that by getting him therapy. Not everybody in these positions are dumb or bad people. We all need a little therapy, too. So, again, let's have some compassion here.
Thank you! Same thought here! How hard is it to step out of decades-old conditioning?
The fact that his mother still went even tho she kept saying how she couldn’t be so far from him
"you cant talk to me like that i did what i thought was right" yea well she can and you were horribly wrong
Van’s mother is so toxic. Undeniable. And she was diagnosed with some mental illnesses. But I wonder if Van’s dad feels somewhat responsible…? Not that I believe that but I can see the logic. The dad did a bad thing by cheating, and the mother became unwell and unstable as a result. It just adds another layer to Van’s mixed feelings. It does suck that the mother is holding him hostage by weaponizing her own health.
Lol woman never take responsibility 😂 shes crazy, end of story.
The father shouldn't take responsibility because you don't just become bipolar. She was very likely crazy before hand but the father was dealing with the baggage.
@ChairmanMeowzah the father is the reason why she became like this because he couldn't be a decent enough husband
@@umm3766 That's dumb, did we watch teh same story? You don't just get bipolar cause a bad experience. Bipolarism doesn't get cured either and it doesnt spontaneously develop like that. If she isn't handling her issues after the fact, she wasn't handling them before.
14:36 she literally knew it from the beginning, yet "Surprise Pikachu Face"
I like that she gave a final heartfelt conversation instead of just leave like other stories, and they understood each other and went through what to do next. Kudos for them clear things out. And the husband is now free from manipulation.
My husband insists on the middle seat so I can have the window for my comfort…she needs to get with someone a million times better who will treat you like a queen! They are out there!!!
U won in life
I don't buy the cop-out that all these little girls claim they didn't realize what these boys and sperm donors were like. When you look at the dating period you see a few months, a few weeks. had an 'oopsie'. and I don't buy they are accidental either.
Also got a woman that treat you like a king. My best friend is like that. She wants to spoil her boyfriend. But her boyfriend also wants to spoil her. So last time they had to do a paper / rock / scissor to choose who would drive for their vacation. So that the other one can relax. They always gave gift to each others just because they love to surprise each other. Its so cute to witness 😂😂
those are actually the worst kind of marriages
the best kind are when the couple communicate with each other and take turns sharing the window seat
That is adorable! They are a match made, please let us know if they get engaged etc! @wisygirlywopitty770
Too much red flags
*many
@@ImNotaRussianBot sorry IAM not native English
I went through all of that with my mom and my wife was about to leave me too until she have that last conversation with me i thank God everyday. Moms like that should NEVER have kids especially son's making your son's in to your personal servants and manipulated them into doing what they want and then throw them away whenever you don't need them anymore that's terrible mother and if any woman support that you looking straight in the mirror
13 is not to young to understand divorce
It’s called emotional incest. It’s what the mother was doing. They make the child into a partner, best friend, and punching bag.
At that age, I didn't understand why my father wouldn't look at me whenever I called out to him from across the street. I didn't know he was seeing another woman behind my mom's back, I literally grew up wearing rose coloured glass until I was 19. These sorts of situations do happen more than you think and I hope to the gods you didn't experience this. I no longer blame myself for being so clueless as it wasn't my fault I grew up under a rock. I had a helicopter mom who sheltered us from a lot more than she should've and is now facing the consequences of her actions. All in all, it frackin sucks and I'm actually happy Van has a wife who cares about his mental health and understands what he desperately needs. If she had left him, MIL would've done far worse things to him to the point not even Matt can help. Sometimes all it takes is an outsider's perspective to pull them out and see the bigger picture ❤️🩹
It's a first time when OP's husband - "mama boy" is actually stand up against his mother and apologising on his knees for what he's done. With his father and therapy help rhey gonna be together and have a happy family, OP is literally saved him frm that horrible woman
Don't believe it these guys usually end up psychologically unstable they melt down it doesn't work In nursing I ran into them all the time and unfortunately I mistakenly married one I didn't really understand what was going on He didn't really show the usual signs she was good She never showed it until after we were married. He also hid the parents from me for over 7 months of dating I didn't meet them until he had a medical emergency an allergic reaction to Rx cough medicine. They didn't even know about me I should have walked at that time. I just couldn't figure out why they didn't know about me They were shocked too. Things just didn't add up but I did have second thoughts however I had gotten the wrong counseling was told it was my fault etc and the engagement had been too long I had wanted to call it all off but the counselor said no just get married and it'll all be okay No it wasn't The marriage was over within 6 months but it took two and a half more years to get away. I realized pretty early on what was going on financially and physically we've been in a really horrible car accident just before the wedding I couldn't drive nor get a job but I worked my way out of it and eventually got away. In that process he slowly devolved into a huge mess. I watched a man become a hinged because of his mother. My husband's ex-wife did this to his children She used the same thing I'm pretty sure she molested their son who keeps their child sleeping with them and their lover until the age of seven or eight?
Some part of me is glad, but unfortunately the other part of me senses that OP's happiness won't last; when OP and Val have kid on the way, Naomi will conjure up more %£?@ed up shenanigans to destroy their marriage, and OP will have to file for divorce. Not only that, OP will also have to, either, terminate her pregnancy, or give her baby up for adoption, but under no circumstances, should she give Val, her FIL, her family, friends, or others any info on her two choices.⚠️
Lol 1 min into it and we already know man is crap (she started to date him cause of peer pressure and him being a creep who didn't respected a "no") yet she praise him for being sweet... Wow good luck for her she will need it
Edit; omg thats worst nonsense than twilight...
The fact that there are multiple stories of people wanting to go on honeymoons with people is wild to me. Why would you wanna 3rd wheel on their screw sessions?! Especially a mother, freaking yuck.
The self harm was just a manipulation
So I'm listening to the story I'm not done with it yet I don't know how it ends all I have to say so far is why did you agree to marry him like you already saw the pattern where he would literally drop any and everything to go be with his mother
Moms, learn to let go. Don’t be the Augusta Gein of this century. 😂😂😂
You saw the red flags and you didn’t run. Honey, that’s on you.
Normally, i dislike cheaters but the dad was a cool guy and dodged a massive bullet
Matt should have sued for parental alienation, because that woman is unstable and all this was inevitable.
OP got all of the warning signs of Van being a die-hard mommy's boy way before the wedding happened. She put herself into this entire situation.
*barf* AI is too poetic
He was 13 when they divorced, that's plenty old enough to have an understanding of what was going on.....
OP should just divorce him. This will repeat.
an alarming amount of people in the comment section saying that the husband is a red flag and to divorce him is disgusting.
OP saved her husband from further abuse from his own mother. which is amazing. and she did it because she TRULY loves him.
and to those people. do you deserve to not have anyone to love because you are constantly manipulated and abused by someone?
also extremely alarming that men/boys get abused in this way and everyone seems to face the other way. calling the husband a red flag yet not even looking at the abusers way (the MIL).
disgusting. huge props to OP. i wish nothing but happiness for that couple.
Finally a couple that doesn't break up in the end!!! 😭😭😭
NO YOUR THE AH FOR EVEN MARRYING HIM AFTER 100 RED FLAGS . THIS IS ON YOU 😂
Naomi is so toxic and controlling that I almost got poisoned just watching this...
Van is very obviously a victim of emotional incest, his mom sees him as her replacement husband and expects him to fulfil husbandly duties to her. She sees OP as a rival that endangers her relationship with "her man" because OP can give him what a mom can't, hence why she acts so jealous and tries to establish dominance as his real number 1 girl. It's not enough to snub OP, she wants OP to see that she is the true wife and that all OP will ever be is the sex provider and baby maker she tolerates as a public formality.
Everyone saying she needs to leave him need to take a second look at themselves. This guy was fucking traumatized and was afraid his mother would kill herself if he didn't do as she said. And he atoned for his wrongdoing and went to therapy for it. In most cases, your first step should not be to go nuclear, it should be to attempt to repair the relationship. You leave if no actions are being taken to correct the problem (they can say whatever they want but it's actions that matter). He did that in spades
The Momma’s boys in these stories get so messed up. Pay attention to these scenarios they are really common in these stories. Something about these bad mothers that make emotionally stunted men or genuine evil creatures.
I would have divorced the husband if the husband purposely ignored my phone calls at the lounge.
The MIL has an unhealthy obsession for her son. It felt like she wanted to be the one to marry her own son then anyone! Op needs to run. And run fast
Guy was a whole red flag, never date or settle with someone who has no spine or is a mama's boy. Those guys are failures when it comes to relationships
I bet good money mother and son shared more than bed and shelter.
I’m only 9 minutes in but OP is kind of an AH here, I don’t really feel bad for her because, FFS, how many of these red flags are you going to sit and accept before you finally put your foot down on the mama’s boy?
OMG OP!😡😡😡 Why did you continue to date that mama's boy let alone marry him?????
Yes YTA why would you have lasted this long?......its way to fn weird. You should have been gone instead of making dumb bs excuses
Concerning how crazy this woman sounds I wouldn't be surprised the suicide attempt was some way to manipulate the husband.
Wait!! MIL traveled by herself to Hawaii? I thought she didn’t want to be separated from her son.
The mom is a jerk who needs to get help and they shouldn’t of forgiven the Dad he still cheated, and he made a fucking stupid excuse and don’t say it. Oh well, he was a good father. Ted Bundy was said to be a very nice person and friend yet he was a psychopath.
There is nothing more destructive for a boy then a hovering controling guilting mother,,, that leads to a stunted unsecure young man or a hyper aggressive manchild ,,,
She is now 32... They met when she was 29
4 years relationship and engaged for 8 month
please tell me those 8 months where included in those 4 years... then you could say its round about 4 years
otherwise it doesnt really make sense from the beginning and is 2nd place to the worst starts into a story for me
If I was OP, I would’ve got the marriage annulled.
So immediately after he proposed he ditched to stay in the hospital with his mom even though other people offered to take care of her? Girliepop RUN
THIS is how you hold a man accountable by public humiliation. They think women are soooo weak and loving that they won't do such a thing. Now they learn
She went alone after saying all the bulllshiit that she cant be away from her kids 😂 never get together with adult child
I wouldn’t married him in the first place, girl why
Immediate divorce. I can’t be married to a Bagage the size of a mother.
Too bad they don't have medication for narcissists.
There’s mammas boy, and then there’s whatever the holy hell this is
Lol mummy left for Hawaii and left man boy at airport...😆
"all men are the same" he's your son not your husband lol
creative writing of the fakest kind...
Dammit! Who tf goes honeymoon with their mom?
pity the ED didn't succeed in the attempt.
What Van should have told her when she claimed they were so happy before the wife, was that mil was the only one happy before. Her behavior is a form of abuse, even the suicide attempts were a form of emotional manipulation to get him to do what she wanted and it almost cost him his wife and potential healthy family. I hope he doesn't let her back into his life.
I hope not, either, because if he does, then, OP will have to file for divorce, and make a fresh start with another man; one whose family are good people.
This sounds like my mother . I'm already in my 30’s and still single. I am so lost right now. I don't know what to do...
I'm so sorry.😔
Good god Van😡 ! Talk about emotional incest and coercive control. Naomi is crazy and Van was a mama's boy. OP should have run for the hills once she discovered what Naomi was like.
#*@%in' straight. OP should file for divorce, focus on healing herself, and then find another man to marry and start a family with; a man whose family are good people.
MIL is "dating" her son.
Toxic relationship from the start. I would've left him after the first moth or so in the dating phase. His mom might have some medical conditions, but he has no self respect for himself. If it took them that long to have that conversation, it shows they both lack communication. He should've heard that after all OP was put through.
It's good that they are trying, but I don't see it lasting if they can't communicate properly. He knew his mom was overly posssesive, and she knew as well. Both let this happen and it wouldn't have gotten better unless they started to open up to each other. Who knows, OP probably should've gotten the marrige anulled so they could eithet try again and have it her way, or left him for better options.
Why did it have to turn AI
Yeah i wouldnt even look at him after learning this. The guy is weak
Can men explain to me why ya'll have an inherent need to take your mother on your HONEYMOON?? PLEASE. Explain this.
avoiding bad mils are the trend right now
The clue was when he booked his NEW BRIDE for economy while he flew business. That’s going to fail 100 / 100 times bro!
I would have still divorced him.
Same here.
Sorry right from the jump he was basically stalking OP at work...that's not "cute" that's creepy and it needs to start being treated as such...She told him 'no' and he refused to accept that until he could badger her into accepting. From the start of the relationship the expectation was set that he could bully OP into what he wanted and she'd eventually relent...
She literally tried to turn her son into her live in boyfriend and isolate him all because her husband cheated on her. I don’t condone cheating and he should have planned to leave if it was possible but I see why he wondered as shitty as that sounds. She’s creepy( I’m 5:10 in)
6:00 she’s disgusting for using her suicide attempt against him
20:58 I’m happy they worked it out and he got snapped out of that twisted bubble his mom got him in, I wish them the best and I see a possible restraining order being put on that “mom”
the husband should have never cheated and ruin her he should have stayed but no his so selfish
@@umm3766 I’m not justifying what the husband did because what he did was spineless and fucked up but I’m pointing out how the mom had been manipulating him and I find that more disturbing than anything and I’m happy that he actually put in effort to solve the problem rather than staying in it and his wife is the biggest saint because she didn’t have to deal with that but she chose too dig deeper after seeing that this situation wasn’t him just kissing his mom’s ass, it’s a reoccurring issue of manipulation and gaslighting
@@umm3766 also when did he cheat?
I DO think husband is a complete idiot for everything he did…but his mother also just seems to be an INSANELY toxic and manipulative person who’s emotionally gaslight him throughout his entire life.
I’m glad he at least finally saw the light
NTA because Op's fiancé is a SONSBAND! Call it emotional incest, covert incest, enmeshment, co-dependency, emotional abuse. It all started with his parentification and then evolved over time. He also lied to OP's face at the airport. I'm sure there were other lies in the relationship. He broke the trust.
Shouldn't let someone like this in your life as they rarely change and easily fall back into those behavioral patterns.
This is so heartbreaing, I truly wouldn't stand for this really. I'd divorce him immediately
I don't feel bad for people who marry MaMa Boys. I know this is a terrible comment but, I feel like the Mom's and Son's are sleeping together. Its just creepy.
My friends mil is like this, sadly she won’t the guy bc she “loves him”. Lil man can’t be 20 miles away from his mommy dearest 😒
Honest question. With this arrangement of his, how did his mom not get the economy class ticket?? C'mon, an F turns into a B easy which with forgery, why try for an A? Just got greedy
I'm really glad he seeked therapy and started working on it. I really hope things work out for them. Too many times we see stories similar like this, but the husband almost always chooses his mother, over his and his partner's happiness. I really hope and pray this man is one of the exceptions and that he fully heals from his trauma. Having a parent make you feel responsible for trying to commit suicide is sick and traumatising on so many levels.
Im sorry but OP gets litetally not an ounce of sympathy from me, the writting was on the wall from minite 1
OP saw every single red flag from right out the gate and ignored every single one of them....yikes
Personally I don’t think she should have agreed to marry him until he started going to therapy.
Emotional incest is so creepy😅
Exactly. The Oepidus complex.