Bitlife but I'm a terrible Amish man

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  • Опубликовано: 17 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 1,1 тыс.

  • @pagansbasin6657
    @pagansbasin6657 2 года назад +8109

    Kevin’s hardest BitLife challenge: don’t become a terrible person

    • @oliclay1348
      @oliclay1348 2 года назад +253

      I get giving video suggestions man. But they have to be realistic 😅

    • @MaiaMirabell
      @MaiaMirabell 2 года назад +7

      *LOL*

    • @TheSoup87
      @TheSoup87 2 года назад +39

      Me remembering his perfect person video

    • @Madladrifle
      @Madladrifle 2 года назад +8

      I dont think thats even possible

    • @frogchamp.
      @frogchamp. 2 года назад +28

      Because of Kev, i started an family on bitlife that has lived on for about 150 years with 5 or 6 generations. First, i started a life of organized crime and had a child. When i die i take control of the childs life, marry somebody rich and old, have 1 to three kids, kill the person you married, and adopt the family job, the Latin Mafia. What's funny is, most the time when i take control of the child, they have a pretty normal life with normal jobs. (Photographer, Artist, etc.) And then i do the aforementioned things, ruin their life, and inevitably die in prison.

  • @mossrosemcc
    @mossrosemcc 2 года назад +5036

    I love that Kevin doesn't even wonder if murder is anti-amish

  • @annekejacobs1270
    @annekejacobs1270 2 года назад +4546

    *clubs his boss to death
    "Yay I found a way to go clubbing as an Amish person"
    I'm dying 😂

    • @annie_are_you_ok
      @annie_are_you_ok 2 года назад +11

      it's pure gold

    • @aceeduventures
      @aceeduventures 2 года назад +2

      ruclips.net/video/bev-dLoM4lc/видео.html
      держись солдаты 🇷🇺.

    • @lordben3787
      @lordben3787 2 года назад +29

      The Boss was too

    • @lexorwhatever4940
      @lexorwhatever4940 2 года назад +11

      Dude I spit my water I died... So did his bo-

    • @louis8487
      @louis8487 2 года назад +8

      You’re dying? I’m sorry that’s so sad.

  • @yourlocaljoyandhappiness8461
    @yourlocaljoyandhappiness8461 2 года назад +2574

    "I have a cat. Release it into the wild"
    Love how Kevin's first instinct when it comes to children and pets is just AbAnDoN

  • @manologamerss5801
    @manologamerss5801 2 года назад +667

    15:30 You gotta respect his girlfriend's dedication to staying with him until that moment. He: Tried to go into relationship counseling immediately, and insulted her when she didn't want to go. Asked her for money when they were engaged and then cancelled the engagement when she said no. Insulted his supervisor, tried to sue them, and got fired for it. Tried to hook up with a friend he hadn't talked to for years. Put up one of their children for adoption when she didn't want to make love to him. Did many, many burglaries over the years. Accused her of having another man's baby when it was clearly his. Joined the Mafia, instantly got caught and became an informant. Not sure what this woman saw in Noah Electric that made her endure this behavior for several decades, but you gotta admire it.

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 года назад +147

      I mean, her son didn't get the same level of patience, tried to give her elephant laxative once, and she whipped him to death on the spot.

    • @chuckn4851
      @chuckn4851 2 года назад +70

      I think it's more fear and gaslighting than dedication, but still major props to her I guess

    • @Interstellar.1
      @Interstellar.1 2 года назад +64

      The spark they had was just *ELECTRIC*

    • @aeisharodriguez1567
      @aeisharodriguez1567 2 года назад +4

      😄😩😩😭😭😭 no, for real!!

    • @aureliaavalon
      @aureliaavalon 2 года назад +15

      @@Interstellar.1 Ironic since she refused to sleep with him several times.

  • @Aymelia-colon3
    @Aymelia-colon3 2 года назад +3901

    Like the great poet "Weird Al" Yankovic once said: "We been spending most our lives, living in an Amish paradise"

    • @CallMeKevin
      @CallMeKevin  2 года назад +1465

      thank you for the wise words Ps2 Nedward Flanders

    • @blumpet6250
      @blumpet6250 2 года назад +167

      @@CallMeKevin big words for a man named KEVIN

    • @totallynothatguy
      @totallynothatguy 2 года назад +148

      “We churn butter once or twice, living in an Amish paradise”

    • @kraanz
      @kraanz 2 года назад +93

      @@CallMeKevin "Raise a barn on Monday... soon I'll rise ANOTHER!"

    • @compoundcrown7689
      @compoundcrown7689 2 года назад +25

      My favorite song

  • @mk_the_maniac2091
    @mk_the_maniac2091 2 года назад +1412

    “Id probably be evil without the internet too” Ah yes, a world where Kevin still works retail

    • @lexorwhatever4940
      @lexorwhatever4940 2 года назад +43

      I became evil because I worked retail. It's understandable.

    • @mjkrh
      @mjkrh 2 года назад +15

      Evil Kevin ......
      Kevin

    • @kaitlynkim8054
      @kaitlynkim8054 2 года назад +1

      aww ajo pop pp

    • @Ethan.YT.
      @Ethan.YT. 2 года назад +1

      Screaming

  • @CJDJKobe
    @CJDJKobe 2 года назад +1133

    "Are the Amish good at running?"
    True story, one time I was at a 5k in central Pennsylvania, and who won the race? An Amish man. Literally running in full denim. Never have I been more aroused in my life

    • @Isosyth
      @Isosyth 2 года назад +102

      Fuck can they run...

    • @flockfighter
      @flockfighter 2 года назад +339

      It would have been so easy for you to not write that last sentence.

    • @SegmentedOdin
      @SegmentedOdin 2 года назад +41

      wait what

    • @justtrash4769
      @justtrash4769 2 года назад +146

      @@flockfighter The last sentence is what makes this comment good

    • @cbpercy06
      @cbpercy06 2 года назад +10

      ​@@Isosyth like... The Wind?

  • @tpc_red9884
    @tpc_red9884 2 года назад +451

    "both my siblings are getting promotions and I'm just here jobless and angry" That hit waay too close to home for my liking

    • @MoonageCatdreams
      @MoonageCatdreams 2 года назад +10

      Hang in there I have a job and I'm still angry. Keep trying. Hope it works out

    • @still_your_zelda
      @still_your_zelda 2 года назад +7

      @@MoonageCatdreams yep, it just doesn’t stop whether you’re employed or not

    • @MoonageCatdreams
      @MoonageCatdreams 2 года назад +5

      @@still_your_zelda it's fine I just need a different job lol

  • @blancaamaya955
    @blancaamaya955 2 года назад +332

    “i’m going after the one group that can’t go after me”
    I’m dying kevin stoppp😂😂

    • @benwilson5031
      @benwilson5031 2 года назад +19

      Nice to meet you Dying Kevin Stoppp, I'm dad.

  • @fuzzyotterpaws4395
    @fuzzyotterpaws4395 2 года назад +1014

    Kevin should play a game called Clock Tower (1996) because it seems perfect. Outdated graphics, bad voice acting, choices that can get you killed, and a murderer with a giant pair of scissors.

    • @sanuelkessler8435
      @sanuelkessler8435 2 года назад +19

      the Jontron episode makes me think that Kevin will love it.

    • @1umbreon4life
      @1umbreon4life 2 года назад +5

      This sounds perfect for him :o

    • @Catlady29
      @Catlady29 2 года назад +7

      I love that game, but it's a bit too scary for him probably

    • @t.castro4493
      @t.castro4493 2 года назад +2

      I've been meaning to play the Clock Tower games for over 10 years now 😔
      But seeing as I'm a noob, I'd probably lose frequently.

    • @lungse.2565
      @lungse.2565 2 года назад +6

      Clock towel

  • @Haliceph
    @Haliceph 2 года назад +516

    Only Kevin could make "I'll donate you to science too" into a threat. Also I'm loving that Sims 1 background music

  • @JOSHfReDeRiCkS1911
    @JOSHfReDeRiCkS1911 2 года назад +830

    It’s impressive that they had a child by talking in bed fully clothed 😂

    • @AnderEvermore
      @AnderEvermore 2 года назад +99

      The miracle of God it was.

    • @happytofu5
      @happytofu5 2 года назад +80

      I mean technically you can have sex under these conditions. No need to get undressed or stop talking 😂

    • @Ratman.Not.Batman
      @Ratman.Not.Batman 2 года назад +15

      its a miracle

    • @YouKnowImOnMyPeriodYah
      @YouKnowImOnMyPeriodYah 2 года назад +18

      Virgin Mary part 2

    • @lannyoneill3489
      @lannyoneill3489 3 месяца назад +4

      ​@@happytofu5The amish wear a lot of clothing though, so I don't think it would be possible

  • @VanWolf
    @VanWolf 2 года назад +1710

    "I am an unexpected pregnancy, I am a Cancer, I am dumb as a rock."
    Stop calling me out Kevin 😭

    • @jg9301
      @jg9301 2 года назад +7

      SAME

    • @loganmorgan409
      @loganmorgan409 2 года назад

      Well you're attracted to animals so you can add disappointment to your list

    • @thomas-wr1fj
      @thomas-wr1fj 2 года назад +7

      @@loganmorgan409 dont project logan

    • @loganmorgan409
      @loganmorgan409 2 года назад

      @@thomas-wr1fj 1.My names not Logan little bud. 2. You can literally see it in his pfp, the desperate projection rheoric doesn't really work when my statement is an objective Truth.

    • @VanWolf
      @VanWolf 2 года назад +8

      @@loganmorgan409 rhetoric*

  • @zeitxgeist
    @zeitxgeist 2 года назад +79

    "You are told that your depression is preventing you from being reliable" god damn i felt that one.

  • @SnowyBoss302
    @SnowyBoss302 2 года назад +193

    As someone who lives in the heart of Amish country, watching you try to guess what they’re like was hilarious. And they do have pets. Kevin just likes to abandon things too much 😂

    • @tuesday9670
      @tuesday9670 Год назад +4

      if you live in amish country why are you on the web

    • @user-wh5fj6pj6m
      @user-wh5fj6pj6m Год назад +22

      @@tuesday9670they aren’t amish

    • @kimmerrill3165
      @kimmerrill3165 Год назад +22

      You can leave near the Amish or "in amish country" without being Amish lol

  • @Robocopnik
    @Robocopnik 2 года назад +205

    Paddleboats are OP, it seems like every time Kevin hops in one of those bad boys his mood skyrockets.

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 года назад +11

      It's probably unintended,but they haven't fixed it on the premise that it's really funny that two rides in a boat or plane, no matter if it's a Boeing 747 or a Log Raft, will instantly give you 100% happy and cure Depression and Anxiety.

    • @1umbreon4life
      @1umbreon4life 2 года назад +19

      How do you know it doesn't work irl? When was the last time you took out a paddle boat?

    • @jacobeii
      @jacobeii 2 года назад +3

      A cheap, used, canoe that's like 120 bucks gives you 50 happiness per ride, you can do it as long as the boat isn't broken its insane

  • @SpydrXIII
    @SpydrXIII 2 года назад +448

    this game needs an amish mod that highlights all the options an amish can take, but doesn't stop you from choosing other options.

  • @eggchomp
    @eggchomp 2 года назад +798

    “I’d probably be evil without the internet too.”
    … Even more so? I wonder how catastrophically evil Kevin would be without the internet.

    • @phormex1
      @phormex1 2 года назад +27

      If the internet didn’t exist Jim Pickens would create himself

    • @andruloni
      @andruloni 2 года назад +9

      Without internet, he would have to show us all the evil deeds in person

    • @mossrosemcc
      @mossrosemcc 2 года назад +5

      Oh lord he'd have to move the crime to the streets of spain

    • @internetlurker1850
      @internetlurker1850 2 года назад +7

      @Joshua EdwinRoehl I FUCKING HOPE IT ISN'T

    • @scarletwolf_tb
      @scarletwolf_tb 2 года назад +3

      Without the internet, he'd have no outlet 😂 a truly horrifying realization

  • @oompa1274
    @oompa1274 2 года назад +164

    The fact Kevin didn't even think of working out or going to the salon/spa as a natural way of looking better

  • @chaseowen2998
    @chaseowen2998 2 года назад +274

    "My supervisor literally assaulted me, and I'm the one getting fired because I'm sad".
    Somehow, in America, this tracks.

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 года назад +1

      To be fair, he called her a bitch. And to be honest, she wanted him to work 10 hours a week of unpaid overtime.

    • @sidoniegabrielle269
      @sidoniegabrielle269 2 года назад +49

      lmao when i was 16 i worked at a movie theater and my boss yelled at me until i had to go cry. she then fired me for “crying all the time” despite that being the only time i had ever cried at work. fun place

  • @kroganbers3rker778
    @kroganbers3rker778 2 года назад +67

    "Was the cat named after the kid or was the kid named after the cat?"
    Neither. They were both name after famous tennis player LeBron Jones

  • @ulisessalduna4351
    @ulisessalduna4351 2 года назад +249

    I love how as soon as he got a girfriend he forgot that the amish can't have sex until marriage. but well he's a relationship genius after all so he probably has his reasons

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 года назад +20

      No, he didn't forget, he deliberately removed one of the easiest to follow in BitLife key factors of being Amish. What a Past Kevin.

    • @Lucaz99
      @Lucaz99 2 года назад +3

      Let’s also realize that being Amish is a religion and that Kevin joined the local Christian church in his pursuit of his dream job of exorcist. From that point on, he would to have renounced Amish life lol

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 года назад +4

      @@Lucaz99 Yeah, Kevin knew literally nothing about the Amish beyond that they don't use technology (and even then he didn't know what exactly that meant) hand instead of trying to study their culture to make a respectful video, despite the satire, he instead chose to go with what he thought he knew, and deliberately ignored the information he could easily find, and what he didn't know, he just assumed, like he thought Amish people were very Catholic. What a Genius.

    • @corrie9762
      @corrie9762 2 года назад +1

      @@manologamerss5801 it’s a video don’t take it so hard 🫶🏻

    • @cameronschyuder9034
      @cameronschyuder9034 2 года назад +14

      @@manologamerss5801 I mean, he said at the beginning all his videos were offensive to someone in some way, so he decided to go for a group that cannot be offended (cause they won't be able to see the content). I don't think he was too serious about that part though. Also, I believe he decided to not search up some things just to make the video more interesting, rather than strictly adhering to what being Amish is.
      He wasn't being dumb, he just got lazy/thought this was a better way of playing for the sake of entertainment

  • @justlazykid
    @justlazykid 2 года назад +100

    Kevin's search history:
    Are Amish couples allowed to sleep together?
    (9 months later):
    Can Amish babies get curcimsized?

  • @willismagilous790
    @willismagilous790 2 года назад +760

    Kevin doesn’t think any Amish people can watch him. Wait till he hears about Rumspringa

    • @Milkynut36
      @Milkynut36 2 года назад +86

      Or the fact that there are plenty of amish that have phones and could find this video.

    • @Terratetradon
      @Terratetradon 2 года назад +37

      @@Milkynut36 thats menonite

    • @Milkynut36
      @Milkynut36 2 года назад +47

      @@Terratetradon homie there’s amish all around where I live, they have phones

    • @UtopssAKAPJ
      @UtopssAKAPJ 2 года назад +2

      never heard of it

    • @ONYXPROJ3CT666
      @ONYXPROJ3CT666 2 года назад +15

      i have a friend who is Amish and she has a phone

  • @buzzardly1127
    @buzzardly1127 2 года назад +149

    The fact this family named their kid after their cat since the cat was in the family first 😭

    • @anothercreator7433
      @anothercreator7433 2 года назад +12

      I was named after the cat, lol. My brother way named after our dad, so my parents seem to just be super uncreative with names

    • @Jesse_17
      @Jesse_17 Год назад +2

      @@anothercreator7433 My brother's name is literally my uncle's name 💀

    • @ChuckDanger
      @ChuckDanger Год назад +1

      ​@Jesse That's fairly common in my area. My brother is named after our Dad, and I am named after my mother's brother (Uncle). Just a different last name.. obviously.

  • @nicololacson1709
    @nicololacson1709 2 года назад +34

    I love how Kevin's only options for careers in almost all of his Bitlife playthroughs are Exorcist, pr0n Historian (or set janitor), cat behavior consultant, and horse sp3rm extractor. His siblings always take up being "seamen" and his parents suffer from hemorrhoids (and oversharing). Also, he doesn't forget to steal and murder someone and make bad casino choices, with buying an exotic pet and boat and abandoning adopted children.

  • @Vylexx
    @Vylexx 2 года назад +64

    I feel like Noah Lectricity woulda been a more fitting name

  • @TheAtomicCatastrophe
    @TheAtomicCatastrophe 2 года назад +47

    As soon as he let the cat go I had to rewind to see if the brother was named after the cat or not.
    He was, in fact, named after the cat.

  • @i_is_patrisha2578
    @i_is_patrisha2578 2 года назад +28

    I work at a retail store and one of the weirdest experiences was a middle age Amish couple purchasing a giant bottle of lube and a pack of condoms. Normally I wouldn’t care. But it’s just not something I pictured an Amish couple going to the store to JUST buy condoms and lube. Good for them for real, just threw me off guard.

    • @mx.menacing
      @mx.menacing Месяц назад

      Condoms are what throws me off the most. But yeah I agree, good for them!

  • @calebfloyd4295
    @calebfloyd4295 2 года назад +14

    "Because I'm ugly ,stupid and depressed" literally described my entire life

  • @AltEzio15
    @AltEzio15 2 года назад +35

    "The famous Amish mafia" Kevin there's a whole reality TV show about an Amish mafia and it's hilarious, you've got to check it out

  • @FearsomeHippo74
    @FearsomeHippo74 2 года назад +101

    “Guess we’ll have to murder them then!“
    (Haven’t hit play yet, but pretty confident placing my bets as to how this goes)

  • @bobdolesrevenge
    @bobdolesrevenge 2 года назад +158

    The Amish are pacifists, so they would never murder their boss.
    They'd hire a hitman.

    • @1umbreon4life
      @1umbreon4life 2 года назад +13

      Gotta love those mail-order hitmen. Surprisingly good bang for your buck

  • @StarSeeker35
    @StarSeeker35 2 года назад +43

    Random things about the Amish: They're pacifists. If a family has a phone, it's in the barn. They use technology for business things, not sure to what extent though. A lot of then don't use cars, they use horse and buggy. They live in the world but are not it in that they don't participate in politics at all.

  • @itz_grass5890
    @itz_grass5890 2 года назад +35

    You know it’s a CallmeKevin video when you audibly go “oh god what now” after reading the title.
    Never change, Kevin, never change

  • @Recluse336
    @Recluse336 2 года назад +10

    The head electrician at the factory my dad worked at when I was a kid was an Amish guy. And he had a generator in his barn at his house so he could do automotive repairs as a side job. It's impressive what things certain Amish sects allow and don't allow compared to other Amish sects.

  • @TwinkleTwinkleTruly
    @TwinkleTwinkleTruly 2 года назад +29

    Kevin’s smile when he said “lawsuit” X’D

  • @jazzpancake1167
    @jazzpancake1167 2 года назад +77

    I laughed far too much at the, "That's a bummer." joke. I am mature.

  • @thegaminglord2190
    @thegaminglord2190 2 года назад +27

    Kevin: ok no gambling cuz im Amish
    "proceed to steal and murder people and join a mafia gang"

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 года назад +1

      Ah, yes, the classic Amish way. Constantly trying for hook-ups, murder for petty reasons, join the Mafia, and of course assaulting people at random.

    • @francisthesadcat1406
      @francisthesadcat1406 Год назад

      The lesser evil

  • @Jackoff_icial
    @Jackoff_icial 2 года назад +13

    amish basics: no technology, lots of arts and crafts. carpentry would have been good. they're allowed to experiment a little with technology in their teen years!

  • @AniGaAG
    @AniGaAG 2 года назад +13

    "Yes, Noah, you can sleep over at your girlfriend's place. Just make sure you never stop chatting while she's desperately trying to fall asleep."
    Is this how I have to imagine that...? xD

  • @queeneve7992
    @queeneve7992 2 года назад +4

    Fun Fact: Most Amish people are allowed to use technology, they just don't have technology inside of their communities. My cousin taught a class in rural indiana with a few very conservative amish students in it, he said they could work the ipad faster than anyone.

  • @anastasialovesoranges
    @anastasialovesoranges 2 года назад +26

    I truly believe Kevin still has idle breakout tab open somewhere

  • @rainingBrackets
    @rainingBrackets 2 года назад +14

    BitLife is one of those games that is super boring whenever I play it myself but when Kevin plays it it's always a blast ^.^

  • @gandalf_thegrey
    @gandalf_thegrey 2 года назад +6

    3:07 You can see how proud he is about that joke and its the greatest thing ever
    The intro was the best thing ever
    I go after the one group that cant go after me
    amazing

  • @catienoble3191
    @catienoble3191 2 года назад +12

    As someone from Pennsylvania, I find his complete lack of knowledge about the Amish hilarious.

  • @Hannah-ij2qx
    @Hannah-ij2qx 2 года назад +64

    Finally a bitlife where he can't lose at the casino

  • @jazzisms
    @jazzisms 2 года назад +72

    the uncanniness of this is, that literally last weekend i was among the amish. they make really good ice cream

    • @Bean-hz8jo
      @Bean-hz8jo 2 года назад +4

      Hey im just curious: Were you allowed to use your phone while you stayed among amish people?

    • @jazzisms
      @jazzisms 2 года назад +25

      @@Bean-hz8jo oh yeah totally. we just weren’t allowed to take pictures of them or anything like that. but i took a phone call while i was inside one of their shops. and some shops even accept apple pay

    • @Anarchy_Jester
      @Anarchy_Jester 2 года назад +22

      Where I live there's an amish grocery store and they make most of everything they sell and let me tell you, the stuff they make tastes so much better than the stuff that comes from places like Walmart. The store also smells really good from all the bread and sweets they make.

  • @marinemachine3446
    @marinemachine3446 2 года назад +39

    10 seconds in and Kevin has already made an enemy to his cult.

  • @ReecesCrushedToPieces
    @ReecesCrushedToPieces 2 года назад +55

    Kevin saying that he doesn't know a whole lot about the Amish, meanwhile I'm here from the other side of the world only hearing about Amish people...

    • @meanncat3050
      @meanncat3050 2 года назад +3

      Amish people are kinda stuck in like early lightbulb days...no other technology.

    • @Trans_SovietBee
      @Trans_SovietBee 2 года назад +7

      Its some American religious sect-group thing that lives strictly by the bible.. weird people really

    • @fangsfrthmmrs
      @fangsfrthmmrs 2 года назад +25

      @@Trans_SovietBee they don't even really consider themselves american. and other americans outside of the religion are referred to as English. Because the Amish and Hutterites are usually descended from swiss and german colonists from the 1800s. Some still learn high german in their schools

    • @Trans_SovietBee
      @Trans_SovietBee 2 года назад +5

      @@fangsfrthmmrs My bad. I should've clarified on the American continent. I knew a bit, although very blurry, about that they consider themselves their own kind but I didn't knew from where they came from and what their background actually is so thanks for the insight about them^^

    • @metasteelgaming4373
      @metasteelgaming4373 2 года назад +26

      We have a lot of Amish laborers near where I live. My father and my father-in-law both had roofs done by Amish, and a friend of mine had his front porch built by them. It's weird, they can have/use smartphones (and watch Kevin's video making fun of them) but they don't have electricity in their homes, so they need to charge their phones on job sites. They're a real "letter of the law" and not "spirit of the law" type. The more you know.
      There's a joke about only listening to the second half of AC/DC songs buried somewhere.
      Edited for spelling because phone keybored

  • @RandomWriter9114
    @RandomWriter9114 Год назад +6

    "They didn't give me the interview. Why? Because I'm really ugly, stupid and depressed?"
    Whelp...that's a comment I can relate to! 😂

  • @Seiferboi
    @Seiferboi 2 года назад +3

    Multiple generations of my grandparents came from the Amish. Here's a few tidbits people might be interested in, if they didn't know them already. The Amish can use phones, as long as it's hooked up away from the house. That way they can call a taxi if they need to. They could use electricity during their Rumspringa days, because at that time they don't have to follow the Amish rules. They could also become Mennonite because they're allowed to use electricity. Some Amish communities allow electricity as long as it's for something productive, such as machines for farm work. Only the men can vote on things like that, though. Never heard about the whole sleeping in the same bed before marriage, though.

    • @mx.menacing
      @mx.menacing Месяц назад

      Very interesting, and slightly concerning. I hope modern Amish sects are a bit less misogynistic.

  • @darkwowplayer
    @darkwowplayer 2 года назад +15

    "You refuse to make love to me alright, I'm gonna put our child up for adoption"
    I think Kevin has just discovered a new level of petty.

  • @aryan2009
    @aryan2009 2 года назад +5

    Aways remember, There's no time for sin and vice
    Living in an Amish paradise.

  • @chilidog2469
    @chilidog2469 3 месяца назад +3

    Kevin: **Has his characters do something stupid and illegal**
    Also Kevin: “I just don’t understand why his life was so bad!”

  • @MrAluminum
    @MrAluminum 2 года назад +2

    Kevins BitLife Characters and a Paddle Boat go together like peanut butter and jelly. It never fails

  • @honeybeeing.
    @honeybeeing. 2 года назад +13

    i actually live next to the amish and goodness is it chaotic. they’re not great people (my neighbors, not speaking for all amish in general). they’ve killed our animals sadly, they drive past our house in their buggy at night very slowly with their stereo blasting super loud. they run a lumber mill there. right next door. all year long. for the past several years. it is very chaotic

  • @Carver3483
    @Carver3483 Год назад +3

    “Don’t do the crime if you ain’t got time, but I have I time so we’re go gonna do crime.” ~ Mohammad Gandhi

  • @marveludus
    @marveludus 2 года назад +10

    "my depression is preventing me from being dependable"
    being called out in a Call Me Kevin video once again

  • @slewy6351
    @slewy6351 2 года назад +4

    Amish people have a period between the age of 16-19 called Rumspringa where they can go into the outside world and experience it in all of its decadent glory before they get baptised and swear against our vices. They have the option to leave if they prefer the outside world but most do not. I’m not Amish, I’m not even American; it’s just something I read about a while ago so details might not be completely accurate.

  • @nimmplays
    @nimmplays 2 года назад +37

    One day Kevin will find a game that he lives in a normal life in...
    ...Probably not actually.

  • @brodylindquist9754
    @brodylindquist9754 2 года назад +12

    Kevin: I need children to work for me
    Also Kevin: puts his child up for adoption as soon as they reach working age

  • @AdamGlory
    @AdamGlory 2 года назад +4

    I learned so much about the Amish today. I mean, they can’t exactly come here to refute anything, so it may as well all be true.

  • @chimpinaneckbrace
    @chimpinaneckbrace 2 года назад +3

    Kevin’s understanding of retirement is on par with Michael Scott’s understanding of bankruptcy.

  • @tarekmoneimsaid
    @tarekmoneimsaid 2 года назад +3

    My favourite part of every Kevin's BitLife playthrough is when he switches over to another family member and they're always more successful than him (that is, until he ruins their lives).

  • @Wolfesbrain
    @Wolfesbrain 2 года назад +16

    Me, half-listening at work
    Kevin: "Travis, I'm gonna kill you!"
    Me: "wait, wtf did *I* do!?"

  • @livispuzzled
    @livispuzzled 2 года назад +9

    As someone who lives in lancaster PA where there are a shit ton of amish people, i can confirm that this is accurate

  • @becomingsophiesceliaclife
    @becomingsophiesceliaclife 2 года назад +9

    The kid being named after the cat reminded me of when my son's dad wanted to name him after his cat 🤣 I told him absolutely not, we aren't doing that.

  • @chiefbrownfart
    @chiefbrownfart 2 года назад +90

    There's levels to the Amish life. Some have carriages, some have cars. Some of the more traditional Amish talk smack about others carriages because the door isn't "traditional" enough. 🤣 It really is a full spectrum.

  • @AllineedisKIMI
    @AllineedisKIMI 2 года назад +4

    Doesn't matter what chracter, the recurrent plan Kevin in Bitlife is always crime.

  • @SkyCaspian42
    @SkyCaspian42 2 года назад +1

    I come from your newer Ouya video to say that you mean a lot to me. As a person, and the content you make. The first videos I watched from you were your Telltale's Walking Dead serious, and they killed me. I've been hooked ever since. You've honestly helped me through so much and been the thing that I look forward to on a regular basis. I haven't been here since the beginning, but I'm glad you picked me up for the ride.
    Also this video is really good too

  • @dummnerd
    @dummnerd 2 года назад +6

    I live in the middle of Amish land, and Kevin looks exactly like every Amish in his thumbnail

  • @Spero_Hawk
    @Spero_Hawk 2 года назад +1

    There are a lot of different types of Amish people. Some can use electricity if it's not in the house, like in a shed or barn, some can use cell phones, some can drive, some can use zippers and some can't, some can wear multiple colors on clothing and some only use one. In summation, the Amish are weird and one of life's great mysteries.

  • @palladiumporcupine2651
    @palladiumporcupine2651 2 года назад +13

    I’m going to take a wild stab in the dark and say that Kevin knows nothing about the Amish

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 года назад +5

      Wild? It would've been wild to assume Kevin knew _something_ about the Amish. Like, literally the pun he named his character after was everything he knew about the Amish.

  • @micahphilson
    @micahphilson 2 года назад +2

    _robs multiple houses_
    _won't gamble, because that's frowned upon_

  • @strikerblitz2164
    @strikerblitz2164 2 года назад +15

    "To be fair I'd probably be evil without the internet too", if he's not evil, what is he now?

  • @H1ghV0Lt4g3997
    @H1ghV0Lt4g3997 Месяц назад +1

    I like the implication that murder and theft are okay but the Amish draw the line at gambling

  • @alexg9848
    @alexg9848 2 года назад +4

    I live in Lancaster, where we have one of the largest Amish populations. This is entirely accurate. 100% spot on

  • @insertjoke1613
    @insertjoke1613 2 года назад +2

    I love it how Kevin started working for another Church when he is was amish

  • @abbyj4108
    @abbyj4108 2 года назад +6

    Kevin really went after the one group that aren’t here to defend themselves

  • @AWildJirachi
    @AWildJirachi Год назад +3

    The cat was 14 so they definitely named their kid after the family pet; beautiful

  • @whydidwedothis6905
    @whydidwedothis6905 2 года назад +5

    “He’s just stealing technology so no one else is aloud to use it.”
    That’s killed me 😂

  • @persiepony
    @persiepony 2 года назад +2

    I love how Kevin loves Bitlife so much and it's so entertaining to watch 😂

  • @Red_neck01
    @Red_neck01 2 года назад +5

    Kevin's hardest challenge to get through a whole life with hearing "owww"

  • @the_slime_cat
    @the_slime_cat 2 года назад +3

    This Happened in bitlife for me:
    Russia’s Callme Kevin becomes a local hero after saving 10 people from a sinking bus. He was awarded for his actions.

  • @Moonlight_Slowpoke
    @Moonlight_Slowpoke 8 месяцев назад +4

    The funny thing is the kids named after the cat cause the cat was way older

  • @kaigaron9566
    @kaigaron9566 2 года назад +8

    I missed bitlife. They're my favorite.

  • @Taglas.
    @Taglas. 2 года назад +4

    Kevin: insult my supervisor, get the last laugh!
    Also Kevin 30 seconds earlier: *kills supervisor*

  • @gena2231
    @gena2231 2 года назад +26

    Me: *receives notification : Callmekevin "I tried Bitlife but I am Amish"
    Also me: *crossing myself* jay-sus pray for the souls of the departed

  • @nicoprim8841
    @nicoprim8841 2 года назад +6

    As someone who once had a flip phone, I'm something of an Amish myself

  • @talcatt
    @talcatt 5 месяцев назад +1

    “take a MasterClass in writing?”
    “i’d rather MasterBate” CRYING 😭😭

  • @pinkberryjuice
    @pinkberryjuice Год назад +3

    0:22 kid was named after the cat because the cat was there first

  • @sarah-my1xp
    @sarah-my1xp 2 года назад +1

    My favourite part was where Kevin was trying not to laugh at his own joke during the intro

  • @dayton1_am289
    @dayton1_am289 2 года назад +3

    I am not Amish , but I am from one of the most Amish towns in America so much so that it was featured in a weird Al Yankovic video anyway they can, in fact have electricity in their barn

  • @JPH6912
    @JPH6912 2 года назад +1

    Did anyone else get the Liberty Mutual ad before the video started of an ostrich wedding with the officiant yelling “No Kevin, not today!” At the ostrich in the crowd trying to object? Somehow it felt relevant.

  • @gigi.l
    @gigi.l 2 года назад +33

    Kevin, how did you know that right in this moment I needed one of your bitlife videos...thanks for making my shitty day better ❤️

  • @healsapphire2842
    @healsapphire2842 2 года назад +4

    And somehow we always come back full circle with these... Kevin turns to crime 😂

  • @PaleGhost69
    @PaleGhost69 2 года назад +5

    "My existence is a joke"
    Relatable.

  • @SirPadron
    @SirPadron 2 года назад +1

    Learned something about the Amish basically they vote on stuff to use as long as it doesn't hurt their values than they can use it. Like so some have offices and such.