Pookie and RayRay Might be the Scapegoat | In conversation about the community!
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- Опубликовано: 6 сен 2024
- Pookie and RayRay is a generalized term used to describe societal nonconformists, usually ex-convicts, jobless, unfaithful groups of men. The drug dealers and hustlers on the streets are examples of Pookies and Ray Rays.
Should there be a distinction between the good vs black men? Is that distinction useful to the community?
This is a men's panel on the condition of the black community.
#Menosphere #Blackmen
⚡⚡TIMESTAMPS ⚡⚡
00:01 - Intro
04:42 - The Purpose of this Livestream
11:30 - The Average BW Hate The Average BM?
14:12 - Smoke for Themis: The Coverage of Brittany Renner and Pj Washington Situation
23:36 - Should Men and Women Have Equal Rights?
44:01 - Black Femicide
01:11:02 - The Black Community is Dead?
01:34:42 - Absentee Fathers/Fatherless Homes
02:09:10 - Entrepreneurship and Financial Literacy
02:14:57 - Hypergamy
02:20:03 - Combating Racial Disparities
02:24:33 - Smoke for Themis: Pandering Accusation
02:27:16 - Community Building and Contribution
02:41:58 - Themis's Community Post (Submission vs Exploitation)
03:03:31- Feedback/Critique for Themis
03:05:27 - Closing Remarks
03:17:29 - After Show
*What were some of your favorite moments, or moments that stood out to you? Put it down in the comments!* ⬇️⬇️⬇️
⚡⚡ Subscribe to Themis’s other channel, Debunking Excellence!
ruclips.net/channel/UCfJ7hf7Zo5Al3huaY7ZP5yw
⚡⚡ Check out Themis’s blog! themisandthoth.com/
THANKS FOR WATCHING!! LIKE 👍 SHARE & SUBSCRIBE ✅
Thank you 🙏🏾
Not "Pandering Accusations" than had the nerve to say I agree though
@@ThemisThoth ❤
@@Londonlink 😂
The Gag is Pookie and Ray Ray is an energy that any many can emulate; not a person/stereotype. There are plenty of Pookie and Ray Ray Doctors, Lawyers, Engineers, Teachers, Police Officers, Truck Drivers, and the list goes on.
Exactly!
"Pookie and Rayray" is a mindset!
There’s Pookie, RaY Ray, AND Tyrone. They can’t be the first two because P & RR will tell you they ain’t ish from the top. Tyrone is deluded that HE alone is ‘a good bl@k man’. They are still tr@sh. 🙃
@@YveWin Tyrone, Peanut, Chad, Kyle, whatever name/whatever culture; like the comments above stated, it’s a mindset that anybody can have. However, there are people who will try to convince you into thinking that these men have “a look”; they don’t.
@@YveWin you are right thought the men who have these types of degenerate mindsets ain’t ish.
@@YveWin I don't know if I could stretch my mind to consider all of these archetypes in such a nuanced way. BUT, I do know that ANY man can have that energy, as originally stated. Income/profession a non-factor. We've seen this.
That man said blk women should have a man in the home if you want protection, but it’s the men in the home that’s putting the women in danger 😒
Plus if a woman is single, maybe an elder widown...does she not deserve protection?
It was amazing letting me be apart of this panel Themis, once again. Thank you. I will say one thing, men like DT I see in our community on the daily. You know that "I'm the ONE good Black man" mantra. My message to Black women is that problematic Black men are not your problem there for I advise you all to distance yourself from having to explain your humanity & womanhood to them. And that's not to tell you all what you should do, but I equate that with explaining YT Supremacy to YT folks. You will always have push-back because some folks don't understand the concept of listening, learning & applying. As Black men, we created these individuals & it's up to us to solve it. This is one of the few panels I have been apart of where Black women did not get brought up every 5 seconds in relation to our issues as Black men, at least some of us tried to follow that.
I appreciated your comments 🦋
I’ve been telling women that there are men who get it. Women do not need to explain anything to MEN. Just like you men talking to eachother and holding yourselves accountable, it leaves room and a safe space for women to do the same! I’m here for ALL of THIS!
Nice to have you on the panel
It's the "we created these individuals & it's up to us to dolve it." for me.
Much respect, sir, and glad you were able to get on a weekend live...
Other communities shame men for leaving their families. A high-profile man is considered a failure to leave his family... especially when they have young children. There is a community disownment so to speak across the board. Families of the man tend to excommunicate these men. They woukd NEVER be held up as a "good dad" for just "being in their child's lives". Men are a part of that accountability. We glorify and other men still communicate with these men.
I’ll never understand how this is a norm (among so many problematic others) and yet ppl still pretend not to know what’s wrong with kids, our family structures, communities, etc. Being an absent father or a terrible mother who’s around should never be met with silence in the face of people who need to be held accountable for their terrible choices.
Amazing comment!
A man that leaves hos family should be shamed
I loved this live 😍, men talking with men, without derailing the conversation or trying to argue with women or running around in circles (with an occasional backtrack and PP 🤭). Overall a wholesome conversation 👍🏾 with some actionable points for men brought forth by the men. Loved it! ✨💕
More of these please and thank you 💯🙏🏾
Thanks for watching! We're glad you enjoyed the discussion 🙂
Listen…… when Themis had to explain that Black community = Black race, I was floored. 🤯….
🥴
Smh...
And people who don't understand that are voting, having children, in careers that can change the course of others' lives etc...
DT is the Pookie in this conversation lol
This is the fact they don’t want to accept!!! It’s not the man on the street corner with his pants sagging- men with DTs ideology are the reason why we’re failing
I feel like DT is looking at the humanity of the men who leave, but not the women who stay
Yes!!
He's a useless dusty. He is why the community sank like the titanic.
Or the children they leave behind
He doesn't care about the women or children left behind he has a grown little boy complex of "BUT HE NEEDS TO LIVE HIS LIFE!" As if the child's life is less than and the women's life is less then and HE and HE alone is the sole person that matters
Does "DT" stand for "dusty"? Because this man was a _perfect_ example of *EVERYTHING* Cynthia G has been bringing awareness to.
😂😂😂
Nah. It stands for "Don't Trust".
Unfortunately yup😑😐
@@sdothoward2743 while you continue to spread your dusty seeds. Effeminate male
@@sdothoward2743 As a happily married woman, marriage is not a flex it's a choice. My husband is wonderful, but I was happily single when we met. Stop acting like women today want to be married to cowardly bums. Most men today aren't husband material.
The part of the discussion where provision for protection was discussed is exactly why women and children are not protected. As Themis pointed out, you don’t need to be romantically involved with someone to offer protection. There was a time when families took care of people who harmed people in the family. These women and children have brothers, fathers, uncles, cousins, etc. who can come and offer defense for them. Even though I feel that Danileigh’s brother was doing some of his mess for clout, he did show that the family wasn’t going to stand by and let DaBaby treat her any way that he wanted. Even that guy that bragged about having the same “appetite “ as R Kelly understood that he could not get away with his predatory behavior with a girl whose family was involved with her. The absence of basic protection for the most vulnerable people in the community is one reason why the black community looks the way that it does.
Plot twist: There *IS* no Pookie and Ray Ray.
Just a figure Bm can use against Bw in order to create their version of the bad Blk man whenever there is a hint of complaint about their maladaptive behaviors. This mystical figure they make up also allows them to project their h8 for each other onto someone else, since we know that Bm hate Bm more than anyone else.
And we know they themselves don't believe in Pookie because when we talk about the combined bad elements in the communitah, who would be the Pookies, we are then told that it's just the men *WE* know or engage with, which is statistically simply impossible.
They think putting on the suit distances themselves from that negitve ghetto esthetic they connect with those names. However, the Pookie RayRay whoreish, not taking care of home or family mindset stays with them, even in the suit. Even when they work 9 to 5s.
It's so maddening,they literally think the suit or changing the way they dress absolved them if the trauma they cause the overall community.
Another BRILLIANTLY stated comment!
Statistically this is possible. It is every black men that Every black women know meaning they all are.
This was a great live. I would love to see more like this. Maybe you can do a man panel once a month or every 2 weeks. We need to see more men speaking about real issues, taking accountability, and looking for solutions. This was beautiful to watch.
This was such a great live even with DT's clownospheric je ne sais quoi. Men like him default to blaming everything on BW as a defense mechanism. That's their way of making sense of their collective failure and refusal to build. They're on autopilot at this point.🤣🤣 But this was a great example of men checking men and I liked to see it. Thank you Themis.
Right he was a HBCU Pookie
Clownospheric loooool I screamed
@@BMWF2023 a lot of them think like DT. I still have HBCU male friends and whenever I try to have these conversations they never fail to disappoint!!!
@@KandyGTV Girl I already know...at my hbcu we barely had bm in the first place unfortunately and the ones we did all sound like him smh
Ladies now You know what the invisible "good black man" looks like. From such run🏃🏿♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃🏿♀️
This is one of the best conversations Between black men that I’ve come across on this platform. It’s truly refreshing.
Absence causes psychological damage as well as men constantly coming in and out of their children's lives, lying to them, and emotionally abusing them. These are also huge problems!!!
Yes! @KandyG well said
Yes! I keep saying kids don't need sometimes parents. Abandonment absolutely destroys a child's ability to trust.
Heavy on the lies! Getting the children’s hopes up just for them to be constantly disappointed. Lordt I’ve seen it too many times. Makes me hurt for the kids.
When Themis said: the black community is not a matriarchy it is a failed patriarchy. I hope DT continues to think about that.
That’s when I was like “that part!” Because even if you wanna call it a matriarchy… the supposed “matriarchy” only came into effect because the patriarchs failed and were too weak minded and weak willed to uphold their patriarchy. It was weak when it did exist so even if it didn’t fail when it did, it would have failed at some point anyways.
@@faitaccompli5878 what are the debunking talking points?
@@faitaccompli5878 If BM & BW started from zero because they got their civil rights at the same time, how did BM, in a world where every other culture is patriarchal, allow a matriarchy occur?
@@faitaccompli5878 I’m asking why were BM not able to establish themselves as leaders of the black community?
@@faitaccompli5878 pathetic.
Woo, I did not even make the connection that OBI pointed out. It is even WORSE that the majority of black men do not have kids but there is a 70% out of wedlock rate. That makes the majority look terribly weak in being able to reign in the wild minority and stop them from reeking havoc within the community.
I cannot attend Sunday lives right now, but the replay is highly interesting. I like this calm, productive energy, and it just proves that when we choose to have elevated discussions, elevated men arrive just like elevated women do -- AND, the FOOLISHNESS can be kept in check.
As a MODERATOR, I also noted WHO was ordered in the last live to come defend their position and did not, and who played in the chat and did not come up for the SECOND TIME. No one respects a coward, ladies and gentlemen, and as it is in the rest of the world, the welcome mat WILL BE SNATCHED.
Wow some BM don't understand community. Many BW are tribal and many BM are individualistic. This video brings awareness. I didn't know many BM think this way. Obi is correct.👌 This is the best male panel I've seen. Good job fellows.
DT mentioned that a woman should have a man at home to be protected but neglects to take note of the fact that intimate partner violence is commited by guess who? a man in your home or a man who WAS in your home. Meanwhile, in the Ukraine communities and countries across borders are working towards removing children and women to safety (who they don't know) and the Ukrainian government is asking men aged 18-60 to stay behind and fight for the country. But the real kicker is, a lot of men were voluntarily signing up anyway not to protect just THEIR WOMEN AND CHILDREN, but all women and children. Meanwhile BM are online blaming BW for the violence perpetuated against BY BM. It beggars belief it really does.
Sad reality 🤦♀️
Ukraine is showing up the WORLD at this moment...
That’s so sad, isn’t it?
🇺🇦🇺🇲❤
I hope all these sisters who are out here marching for blk men are paying close attention to DT. For men like them the blk community consist of people in THEIR circle.. dassit…
Yep! The black sisters that constantly embarrass themselves standing up for them are the same ones that call out of their names.
It's always someone like DT who want "community" support when he runs into trouble too
Accurate
My first corporate job was in a predominantly white firm after a while since I saw my coworkers as individuals I expected the same . I still remember the day that a coworker called what I would describe as a female pookie as one of my people.Then you realize at some point it’s useless to a racist person and a big portion of America it doesn’t matter if you are educated or a pookie or Ray Ray to them we all the same. To me Pookie and Ray Ray causes more problems to us as black people.
This!!!
Hip hop has ruined black people image so its hard to be taken seriously all the time at work
A few things:
1) Based on DT’s commentary, the “good BM” can’t control/curb the behaviour of the “bad BM”. OBI said it, DT and his ilk do not see themselves as a part of the Black collective so they feel comfortable neglecting their responsibilities.
2) For men like DT, an incentive to help the black community is sex or immediate monetary reward. They can’t see themselves mentoring a single woman’s child if they can’t have an intimate relationship with her. They can’t see themselves being involved in any volunteer program because they are not being paid.
3) I have a strong suspicion that DT has made at least 1 woman a single mother. Throughout the live he’s talkative and quite engaged in the conversation but when Themis asked if he had a child, DT would not make eye contact with the camera and shook his head instead of saying confidently “ I don’t have any children”.
I peeped that, too! He got really quiet when Themis asked whether he had children, but he was Chatty Cathy for every other question.
This is a brilliant take!
He is from a single mother himslef and so he is turning onto the same man his father was. He shows his mother such disrespect.
70% single mother rate, but more than 50% of BM don’t have children? Who’s getting these women pregnant then? 🤣
Right! Last time I checked these women weren’t Mary.💀
Right, but they’re “logical.”
Good question 😊
They make the argument that many women share the same baby daddy.
Considering the percentage of black men who are in prison, if they are walking around free, they're likely to be part of the 50% creating babies. Claiming they don't have kids, not taking care of kids doesn't mean they don't have a kid or 2 floating around out there.
80% and it’s black men glad women are not having kids and lowering the birth rate
DT is the prime example of the ills suffered by he BC. He’s not a Pookie per se but his ideology ain’t shyt and does not recognize the harm nor does he care. He only wants to live as an individual, blame BW for everything and do what directly benefits him. Too many BM are like him and this needs to change. We need more men like Obi to step up and put these men in check.
DT needs healing and more connection with people like Obi. My heart goes out to him and other brothers like him--with the right exposure, he can and will realize that the sky is the limit. His outlook can change.
@@rosedevereux2391 I agree. He can be influenced to become a better community member. Men only listen to other men though and they don’t like to check each other. It could be so easy if the ones who are really trying become more vocal.
DT is harmful to the BC and the BC is FLOODED with BM that have his EXACT mindset and when you look at the BC with all of the BLK BABIES both MALE and FEMALE ABANDONED by their blk father's!
No. He IS a Pookie and Ray Ray. He blames his problems on his single mother that stayed to raise him
This was a great live! DT had nothing to contribute after male accountability was established.
I’m a tough cookie, but I would have no problem discussing women’s accountability with the other men in the panel. I would feel safe, and like I would be heard. Very refreshing.
Exactly. If you don't establish what you're accountable for, then they think they can escape it
It would be nice if there was a monthly all male panel discussion issues in the black community, or topics that are trending about the relationship between men and women. This was a good discussion.
I so agree
I agree
Themis, I have to admit. I really liked this live. This is a great direction to take the channel in, and hopefully you agree.
A pleasant surprise. Thumbs up from me.
We can't change everyone for the better but this is an example of how to start. We have so many men who think like DT. Unfortunately, only a Man can challenge this thought pattern in a male with this type of personality. I fear that this knowledge has to be planted at boyhood in order for them to learn that a man's greatness is rooted in the foundation of being your brothers keeper. We have to care about more than ourselves.
His father abandoned him, so he is just now getting this information at adulthood
I am just leaving this for the algorithm. This was so good. I would like to see this once a month. This discuss IS VERY NECESSARY for us as a group. This type of discussion causes growth.
Excellent discussion for men by men. If this could be the norm for the Manosphere then many real life issues would solve themselves. Bravo!
1:41:23 When this guy says, "you make it seem like women don't have a choice in the matter as well" LOL...so we should chain ourselves to men that don't want us? What choice do we have in the matter if a man wants to PHYSICALLY walk out of the house and abandon his family. This is wild!
He still wouldn't answer directly what he wants the woman to do. Abortion or not!?
I AM ABSOLUTELY EXHAUSTED watching the guy in the middle talk in circles 🤧
DT’s ideology = 🗑. Throwing 🍅🍅🍅
DT just want's to blame black women for all the problems in the black community.
A enjoyed this panel of all men. I think you should have more of these to show that there are some men out there that are able to think logically.
Love this. It’s wonderful to see men stand up for what’s right and the truth.
42:47 he is not being berated but schooled on the plight of black women. If a black woman was to say something like the men unalived by the police weren’t complying, everybody would be down her throat. But ordinary addressing of ignorance and blind spots is berating? 😵💫
1:41:21 when bm say they are a good bm, this is what they believe a good bm is. A bm who speaks and thinks like this man speaking here. He is the majority of "good " bm.
DT was entertaining and sad to watch at the same time.
@@RDCFemmes I honestly think he is scary. Not him physically but his mentality is scary. He is the pokie and the ray ray all rolled up into one. He thinks he is a good man but all the while men with his mindset are a major part of the problems going on in the community. They don't want to nor do they feel like they should take responsibility for their actions and refuse to see why that is a huge issue.
So…when the passport bros go over to “poorer country “ to find a submissive wife, get “one” , bring her home and after she been here for awhile and adapts to America’s values, what happens? Because if you look at white men who do this, it doesn’t always work out the way they thought. And when that happens, are you going to do -leave her in a country where she has no one? Do you resort to violence to bring her into the fold? Some of these women are NOT DUMB!
They get their green card/visa etc and then go!
@@dumfriesspearhead7398 absolutely
We need to make the men's panel regular.
This was a great live. Men acknowledging their part in problems they have with women and trying to hold each other accountable while making improvements any little or big way they can. ☮️💟
So far, it's still just talk. Let's see what they DO.
Thanks for tuning in!! 👍🏾
They are the scapegoat. These "good guys" are just scaredy cats.
The best conversation of BM on RUclips. I as a BW appreciates all the honest and clear point of views. I can see a light at the end of the tunnel. Very very nice Themis!!!
Can someone please show the stat claiming only 20% of bm have children?. That stat I found said 80% of bm by age 40 have children. What is this 20% they keep talking about?
It's from a U.S. Census update, I think in 2014. The whole sentence is "20 percent of BM AGES 18-25 have children" ... and by ages 40-50, 80 percent have children...
@@hymnodyhands so they just ignore the other 60% like it don't matter lol
@@PrsWater8 Essentially, the whole manosphere is based on the 1864 idea that Black people DO NOT READ, and so the men in suits who read JUST A LITTLE BIT have a tremendous amount of power over the rest. Most Southern whites didn't read all that much. Most of the Black preachers they allowed read less ... but the MASS could not read AT ALL.
Folks do not realize that you can be fact-checked by people who read nowadays in about five seconds... it is a whole 2022 out here, but they still are hoping we don't know that.
It doesn't exist. Pedosphere is taking parts of a full stat to fit their narrative. By age 29, about 25% of BM have children but they never say the whole stat that shows most BM have or will have children.
This live was excellent 👏 👌 🙌 👍. I wish I could thumbs up this more than once. Good job Themis, especially having control over the panel. This is the first time I've seen a productive video with a group of bm.
*I just want to APPLAUD 👏 the men for their willingness to have a discussion, DT included.* 😭 Themis it were good for you to have a men's discussion weekly or monthly.
Just “Talking” about Blackfemicide isn’t enough.
1:11:19 Black men tend to view themselves as individuals while black women see themselves apart of something greater such as a community. We are not afforded the chance to view ourselves as individuals, because if we do we’ll be labeled as selfish or mean. Black Women are very family oriented and that wasn’t don’t on accident. That’s why they protest for me they don’t ever know know. They see their fathers, uncles, brothers, and sons in other black men, but they never do it in return. That’s why violence against black women is ignored and people turn a blind eye to it. When we are getting hurt they DONT see us as their wife’s,sisters, aunts, daughters and nieces. In fact they view us as complete strangers. That is the problem with this community. This is where the recent sentiments of black women are protected is coming from. If it don’t apply let it fly. If there are some that do it, it’s not enough to make it the collective.
Exactly. This support isn't reciprocated generally. Most black men nowadays are simply selfish and don't belive in community unless it benefits them
*I appreciate when men are protective of women* "Weaker" and "weak" are 2 DIFFERENT things. As a woman, it is obvious to me that women are "weaker," AKA more vulnerable, AKA more fragile. And I do not think it serves us to deny this, or have a problem when men say, "go all the way to the back and contribute as an army nurse, if you wish." I didn't hear "sexist," but rather "protective," as it SHOULD BE.
*I appreciated Adrian's point that men & women shouldn't/ can't be equal.* I AGREE quite frankly!
And thank you Aaron, *ONLY circumstances would let women proclaim they don't need a man to raise children* 👏👏👏
Agreed. There's nothing wrong with admitting that women, by nature of biology and anatomy are more fragile.
The mindset is still very problematic and stems from sexism, regardless of biology.
Women and Men are equal in terms of _worth_ . We differ in areas of _physical_ strength, capabilities, etc.
Agreed! I head that as protective and not so much sexist. Usually if it's sexist, you can even hear the disdain dripping from their lips
I’m a woman and I don’t mind submitting to my “husband” if he’s doing what’s necessary for me to submit. I don’t see submission as slavery or bondage when done correctly on both sides.
Obi saved BM showed there’s decent BM out there while DT keeps making us look bad it was like a battle of good vs evil In this debate
Grunge, Metal, and Rock does NOT glorify violent crime and sexual indiscretion. Rap/Hip-Hop invests in the worse images of the human condition and they know it.
Yep. I'm a grunge/ rock metal musician and while there are songs on the dark side, they tend to explore dark psychology, religious satire, and partying or drug culture. Maybe self harm
Tell that to the teenagers that shot up Columbine . Their music was filled with evil. It was well reported at the time and it wasn't hip hop
This would probably do more to help the BM's image than anything Tina Knowles can put out there. At least this is authentic.
This was so refreshing, emotionally cathartic and feel-good. It's been good and important having ladies on the panels (that I've seen since I just discovered this channel two days ago), however there's something so powerful about seeing men discuss these things. I'm a woman who often will have discussions like this with other women so it starts to feel a little like an echo chamber since we all understand what's happening and address it often. Having discussions with men about these things always get combative and I feel like women wind up defending their experiences and knowledge of what's going on rather than finding solutions. It's nice to see men who have a good head on their shoulders acknowledge the reality of what's going on and actually speak from a place of wanting to find solutions and foster improvements rather than point fingers and blame bw or white people for every single issue. London had a wonderful idea and I'm glad Themis agreed to do this. Such important work was done in this video. It was very encouraging to see.
I like the caller at 52 mins. You’ll gain more respect when you fight for your women instead of fighting against us
35:46 Their lack of understanding that community building is key is the reason why black people across many communities in this nation are suffering and can’t seem to see themselves out of it.
This conversation is much needed among men! Bravo Themis !!!!👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
So refreshing!!!! Please incorporate this format once a week.
Obi stays ready!!! What is his RUclips channel? I want more. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
1:01:08 & 1:02:40 & 1:11:36 👏🏾 Themis & OBI 💪🏾💯👏🏾 And Themis needs make a snipet of the remark at 1:03:09 and loop it to a 8 hour binaural beats video so BM can listen to it while they sleep: WM are not just checking each other, they are checking ALL MEN and they even put a whoooole system in place to do it!!! And if we take a closer look at which men are ending up being checked by that system..... 👀
The gentleman in the military and the gentleman who made the suggestion about agricultural is on point these recommendations… and brainfood is a thing I actually have worked with healthy eating campaigns in the local schools
This stream was so necessary I’m looking forward to more of them, DT tried but was unsuccessful🤣
Hi Themis and fellow listeners, the absence of fatherhood is also rife in the black community in South Africa 🇿🇦 (2018: 43.1%) 42% Single motherhood compared (2018: 3.3%) 4% single fatherhood in 2019. It impacts hugely on the child. I'm a single mother (primary custody no limitations in visitation) with a 5 year old boy who rarely sees his father. He used to cry himself to sleep wondering why his father does not see him, why he is not in his life, whether he is loved. It hurts my heart. He's not the worst as a father but he is very disruptive in his in & outs of his life, broken promises and lack of financial support. I am caught between putting limits on his visitation (court appointed and structured days) or eliminating them entirely... I don't know what to do. Worse thing is the father and I both know how it feels to not have a father and promised not to do the same, but here we are... Help guys I don't know at this point
I am so sorry to hear this; I don’t know much.
My biggest piece of advice is to seek family counseling for both you and your son as you navigate this. They will give you support and tools that this online community might not be able to provide.
@@kmariamv I seeked counseling but was told he was too young to express himself, looking for child psychologists, looking for mentorship for him, but that yearning for a father is something that I cannot help him with short of finding a partner who will step in as a father (the dating pool has poo in it 😭😂). Thank you though
@@Zicwengile I understand continue to look for mentoring programs or character building activities and consider the counseling for yourself as well so you be as grounded as possible.
I’m not sure if you have men in your family who don’t mind stepping up as a positive male figure for your son...?
❤❤❤
Brick to the face REPEATEDLY!!! DT is a 🤡🤡
This was a good live Themis! I think you should have more like this with all men on the panel!
Loved this conversation. Themis, you’re excellence manifested.
I wish that we could refrain from attacking the physical appearance of people brave enough to show themselves. Even though a panelist made some ignorant @$$ body shaming comments about those in the chat (who are largely anonymous and unseen- so why care?), we didn’t need to respond with more ignorance. These comments on people’s physical features show the immature nature of some people and ought to be abolished from discourse. Period.
Peace.
The next time you see that behavior in the chat, tag a moderator and let us know. That does need to be shut down.
@@hymnodyhands xo
I absolutely loveeee his energy! The smiling and pure happiness. It’s makes me extremely happy.
Obi’s passion, specifically the bit about raising his son no matter what, let’s me know he’s the real deal.
DPWH‼️💪🏾
Skin is poppin'!!
2:07:00 - YES!!!!!!!!!
This is what Men's Content is SUPPOSED to look like.
Bro, drop one of these per week.
Exactly 💯
DT being your typical black man who wants to be purposefully obtuse....ugh
Not on social media often anymore, but wanted to step into the comments and say hello Themis and YT community, keep doing what you’re doing, hope to catch a live soon 🙏🏾♥️
It feels nice to finally seeing men having conversations like this! Taking responsibility and trying to find solutions. I neeeded to see this because lately I’ve been feeling so bitter towards our community.
Then at 1:48:31 as it relates to the % of women that choose to be a single mother, "I'm going to bear the burden of proof with that stat" LOL!!! SIR, YES! You brought it into the discussion...😏😏
EXACTLY! He must not know that the person that presents the claim is the one who has to back it up 😂🤦🏽♀️
@@niax782 Right! Such a novel idea 💡 😂🤣
Last comment. Mentorship has not helped because there are still fatherless homes and boys being raised by other men who didn’t have fathers on the streets and in the community. Only BM not abandoning their families will help. A family is any woman you impregnate rather u like her or not! U created a family when u 🌰 in her
My issue with the nurse comment is assuming they’d be nurses and not doctors. That’s where I thought Themis was going 😂.
Excellent. The comment in itself was protective but the assumed occupation was sexist
One more thing, If theses men are not taking care of their children will they provide for their elderly parents? I think not. To those that don't die young; old age will be extremely justifying, humbling and cruel.
There is a third question, though... will they even OUTLIVE their elderly parents?
@@hymnodyhands So true. When my Grandfather died (father of 14), his children, grandchildren and great grandchildren swarmed the hospital. Just an out pouring of love and gratitude. When my Father died me and my brother were there because it was the right thing to do. We were better children than he was a father. I thank God that my brother has followed in the steps of his Grandfather. He has 6 girls and one grandson. He too will be surrounded by love at the end. So, sorry for the long reply 😂
@@Sammiein Oh, I write whole books out here in some of these comments ... no need to apologize!
We need more positive bm. We we bm need to push out these men with this type of mindset out of the community and if there are women that support these men kick them out to they are doing it in Jacksonville right now
Good discussion among BM, with some solutions, and talking accountability! Especially OBI spoke volumes! @2:02:27-2:08:42. Themis need a part 2 of this discussion.
Themis, thanks for all you do!!!!!
The crazy thing is some of the best men I knew had single moms, while some men went to prison with 2 parents. It isnt that a woman cant teach a boy to be a man, its that the boy will feel resentful of his lack of a father and blame his mom, then seek out that mentorship in the streets. Any male role model is key, but you have widows and divorcees who do a great job. A dad can be there and make things worse. I'm gonna be honest, the fact these men leave their children shows you how much help they would be if they stayed. Even married women do most of the work. Married single mother is a trending hashtag.
I love how DT mentioned church & the Bible (which is a community) & adherence to it in one breath & then in the next breathe saying there’s no community. He believes that since he’s a single black male & that since these single black mother homes He literally wants to absolve himself of the community because he definitely thinks he’s above being in the community since he didn’t create a single family home. Ask him if HIS mother was a single mother.
DT said he came from a single mother. He ought to be ashamed
1:39:30 I agree with DT. Unfortunately, no matter if two parents are present, boys are socialized differently than girls (vice versa). Not being a "nuisance" in society is something (I'm learning) boys and men have to actively and deliberately choose not to be/behave...There's an allowance for "bad behavior".
When can teach someone how to play a gender role, but being a decent human being is a different story.
To Adrian Pitters point @ 2:00:55
Somebody said “strike one OBI” 😂😭😂😭😭😭
Such a great live
Thank you 🙏🏾
read the Bible in context! grown men married teenage girls. the girl is a ward of her husband, passed from her father to another for guardianship. no education, no income, no legal rights, no rights of ownership, no rights of consent. wives could even be spanked for misbehaving. after all, husbands were the ones condemned when their wives "misbehaved." thus, it is in his best interest to control his ward. it was a paternalistic relationship. within this context, the wife is a child obeying (i.e., submitting) to her pater.
you are asking grown women, sometimes with multiple degrees, a full-fledged career, their own income, who have full legal and civil rights AND consequences, and who are often already acting as leaders in the workplace and community to revert to the role of a child simply because it was done that way in the past. often, these very women, by far, surpass the wisdom, intellect, resources, and leadership of the very men who demand their subjection. do you see how ridiculous this arrangement sounds in the modern world?
the bible told slaves to honor and obey their masters. we've (mostly) evolved to the point where we disparage subjugation and champion democracy and egalitarianism because we no longer live in biblical times! we have progressed to understand that we need cooperation, not subjection. we need to maximize diverse points of view and leverage unique, individual talents, and resources OF ALL regardless of their sex, race, creed, or socioeconomic background, and this vision starts in the home! primitive societies that fail to catch up with the progress of the modern world will invariably perish. that is the way of evolution.
All of this!!!!
👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿💯
Ha! Great point! Many guys in suits are definitely no good and should be avoided like the plague!
There is literally nowhere in the part of the live with DT that you cant pause it and see the absolute emptiness in his face. Not only was he not listening, he doesnt care enough to listen. He did not come to engage in productive conversation, nor is his mind open to thinking any differently. In my opinion, he shouldnt have been allowed to waste so much space. he doesnt care about the community. Ok you shouldnt be on the panel then right? I much more so enjoyed the other gentlemans participation
I don’t understand why any woman in the chat would want to talk to DT! Wth, are yal not listening to his words?
The way the light hits your skin gives me jealousy to the tenth power
I wish I could like this more than once... This was such a great live!
This is a great video and a great step towards building the black community. This male panel were refreshing. DT just seems like he wanted to disagree with anything that looked like male accountability but I guess it takes all types. Hopefully he learned something from these other men. OB was on point with that legal fund to help men get joint physical custody. Some of these men really are just making excuses while some do need help. And I am a huge advocate for male mentors.
The pink tax is about women having to pay for feminine products. Something we can’t control but have to pay for in order to function. Pads and tampons. Birth control. Etc
Health insurance is higher too
DT does not know what he’s talking about the wealth gap between blacks and whites I generally as large as it is because of generational wealth transfer. The reality of it is is every generation of white people tend to have something that gives the next generation of leg up historically Black people did not have that so that is really the biggest cause of the gap then next of course it’s opportunity and income and then of course investments the ability to attain the wealth within your own generation so that you can pass it on
I knew DT was dusty as soon as he started talking. I do wish these lives wouldn't focus so much on those who detract and more on those who are actually solution-oriented. I understand that in order for there to be a broader change, a large portion of black men would have to change, but I think we should begin with those who already see the issue and want to work on the problem and have a separate conversation for trying to convince dusties to change their mind.
Wow guys who I would actually be quiet and listen to on YT?? I can’t believe. Masculine energy was definitely present on this live. Well except for DT… He makes no sense and sounds like he is always in KS comments. But the others 👍🏼
Thank you so much for this video!
Whew! I know Themis is tired. He had to feed DT an entire life worth of soul food in just under an hour. And DT is the one that brought the Bible up in the first place and he clearly has not read it. He got the cliff notes and it shows. 😩
I was so disappointed watching this replay ... it was Sunday too ... he didn't need to let us know on a Sunday that he ain't cracked the Book since before Covid-19 shut the doors...
@@hymnodyhands Yes! I have had to tell Trumpers, Red Pill Players and old heads. This "carry your weight" and "me, my 4 and no more" is contrary to scripture! Dudes really need to go back to the Torah; read about Joseph, Daniel, Rahab and Deborah.
@@okaygee4132 They wouldn't even make it through the first 20 chapters of Genesis. One man named Abram for love of a child NOT HIS stood up to and whipped the nine BADDEST KINGS existing ... God didn't pick a coward of a man to make MULTIPLE great nations of (as Abraham, a little later)! Now, God did have to develop Abraham, just like He has to develop everyone -- but these men are not READY to face their lack and SUBMIT to God to be transformed!
@@hymnodyhands 🙋🏾♀️Amen! When The Most High chooses us, He knows the greatness we possess and will accept no less. Only that wicked Cain ran around asking "am I my brother's keeper"!
@@okaygee4132 EXACTLY... and folks forget: Cain's line is named in Genesis 4, but disappears from all records after that... because it is "flooded out" in Genesis 7! GONE FOR GOOD. But look at what ALWAYS happens to the legacy of irresponsible men!
Shout out to this awesome panel! This is one of the best men's panels that I've seen. Normally, brothers are cussing each other out.