Yes, I just thought before opening this video, how her videos have helped me in only 10 days. I think that she knows that peoplw who are awakening, might have financial crises, too, as a temporary symptom of the process, and she gives so much free support in her videos. She is indeed a genuine helper.
I told myself these positive affirmations about safety and security for a very long time. But whenever triggers came up, it was like my inner child forgot ALL about it. The mantras didn't work at all. It wasn't until I relived the painful memories **on an emotional level** that I finally rewired the instinctive reactions. My psychologist called it a major "corrective emotional experience". Turns out that one requires not only 1) recollection of a painful memory, 2) a logical re-write of the inner narrative, but also 3) emotional arousal to unlock access to that drive. Without the last component, the emotional part of our brains remains inaccessible, and you can't actually force yourself to believe a new logical narrative only by rationally repeating it to yourself. Embracing the discomfort and painful feelings is the KEY to rewriting the narrative. I used to avoid pain and discomfort like the plague, repressing it even further, controlling even more aggressively. Now I take long walks, dive into the emotions, and hide in an alley to cry my eyes out if I have to. The only way out is through. And there is so much joy awaiting on the other side.
Michelle - this was so insightful. I'd love to speak with you and learn more about how you worked through this - If you could provide any advice that would be amazing.
You had to open up your heart to heal, and then also the hurt came out. Either you open your heart or you dont, and then the pain also was felt. Right?
That is absolutely spot-on. I've been doing EFT for years, on and off, working on all sorts of personal; things, and usually I will succeed most when I manage to really feel triggered by the topic. Tears, real anger, real frustration, fear etc. I thought I was really "tough" and open to change, but I found out that I had been avoiding the very darkest recesses of my experience. The real challenge is addressing the parts you absolutely don't want to even get close to.
Control is a result of a trauma response. I can predict the bad before it happens, perhaps no bad things will ever happen again. But the key is trusting that if something painful does happen, you will heal and move forward.
Sometimes control issues do not begin as a child , as an adult you meet a man or a woman who lies to you and does some shady things behind your back with and you find out , you never be the same any more , you don’t trust anybody anymore. The next relationship you get in you become low key controlling
We can still trust. Just develop discernment skills, and begin to feel what is better for you. Like Christina's video pearl, the Universe provides signes. See them, know them, and become wealthy with trust. The "go with the flow" is your own control. You got this, even as an adult. :-)
It's still hard I get afraid of being taken advantage of or taken for a fool, or having the wool pulled over my eyes. Or having someone trying to take over my life and control me in small increments before I realize it. I grew up in a very dysfunctional fearful environment. A deep understanding has helped create more awareness. But I also used to detach if I feared something and realized this wasn't a good coping mechanism. So even as a long time married man I fear losing my spouse and get fearful very easily. It's so annoying. I have overcome many fears but still do not trust anyone's motives whatsoever.
Jms, I 100% hear you and relate due to similar circumstances. Baby steps. The most powerful thing is to become our best ally by which we rise, heal, calm down. Namaste Brother 🎊🙏🦋
I’ve been dealing with the same fears . Afraid someone will get over on me because it happened so much in the past and now I just make things worse because I can’t relax. Thanks for sharing. It’s nice to know someone understands what this feels like
Wow!. I wasn’t even going to watch this video because I didn’t think it would be useful to me and then I found myself crying. Eye opening. Thank you 🙏🏽❤️
"I am" definitely takes practice. I've been shifting to "I am" and away from speaking to myself in a "you are" or "you should" narrative. I feel more empowered this way, rather than letting my shadow control me.
Aloha Christina! I love that you brought up listening to the communications from nature. Before I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2000, I had many angelic visitors from nature that pointed me in the direction of "getting a mammogram." One such incident stands out in my mind that I would love to share with your listeners. I was a massage therapist in Kona, Hawaii. While massaging poolside at a lovely hotel, a bee kept buzzing around my head. I smiled because I know he was trying to tell me something. I wasn't sure what...later when I was bringing my equipment back to the office, two bees buzzed me, with one actually diving down my shirt and stinging me. All of a sudden I heard the words, "Go get a mammogram!!" I did...and was diagnosed with an aggressive breast cancer. Those sweet little bees helped to save my life. There's never a time that I don't pay attention to nature with her constant messages of one thing or another. Thanks so much for this video and your sharing. Much appreciated!
i don't know why my tear jerks at the end..... i have never cried in front of youtube video before nor that i cry about anything but last few words you give some how send a warm feeling down my body and there is a word that pop up in my head "you are back home" it feels almost like some higher being is telling me that. Thank you, Christina
Dear Christina, you precisely named the reasons for this condition, I cried when remembering my childhood, thank you for your help! your videos are the best!
I have lived in a constant state of unease, and have struggled with trusting and having faith for as long as I can remember. Thank you for sharing the “Why”. I hope to heal whatever wounds I have and aspire to achieve peace in my life.
Christina, you made my day and absolutely are changing my life. i found myself in the why i have become controlling and i had to be put with my back towards the wall by my wife who separated me 2 months ago. i was keep looking at her and what she did wrong until i stopped and look into myself and found myself in need on improving my own flows. i had a dream last night, for the second time, that i was dying after been in a car. the first was by myself and the second was with a friend of mine. while in the first one i was in control of the car, i lost it and falling from a big cliff i could see that i had no chances of surviving, in the second "accident" that i was not in control of the car i bounced of but i could not see if i actually died or not. That made me think more about controlling and that something need to change and trusting more. than i saw your video and i found the root of the problem which is actually what you mentioned. been bullied at young age and going home and hear my parents fight all the time. i want to change myself and trust more the universe and thank you for making this video. will be forever thankful.
I’m so grateful I came across this video today. Yes, I totally control myself. I hold myself tight and can’t relax. It wasn’t circumstances in my own life that caused this but actually my mother told me over and over to be like her and trust no one. I’m now in middle age and while I do trust some, though I can be wary and judgmental of others, the one person I can’t trust...is me.
I was sitting in meditation this afternoon after I watched your Intuition video and I could feel myself doing the most and overthinking. My Spirit Guides told me to let go and relax. I came out of my meditation defeated cause I couldn’t let go. I even said to myself *sigh* “you tried”. Then a few hours later I opened RUclips back up and THIS VIDEO popped up on my feed!! I am shocked because right before my meditation and watching the intuition video, I scrolled way down in your video list and didn’t see this video! After I saw this pop up I dropped my phone on the table and cried. I felt so seen by God and so guided by my Spirit Guides. Like they were helping me and rooting for me to succeed! ❤ thank you Christina, your videos have impacted me in such a positive way words can’t explain what you have done for me❤❤
Another fantabulous video! Thank you for answering the "whys". I am so grateful to have your support! I also had an extremely unsafe childhood with the perpetrators being the majority of family. No one to turn to but myself. At 5 years old my trust in God was destroyed when l was beaten so severly .l was in ICU for over a month with a police officer on duty round the clock. I am just now slowly gaining trust back in the Universe, God . lt has been 48 yrs... it helps me alot to exchange the word God for the word Life . Eg. "I am willing to trust in Life again. I hope this helps someone. Much love to everyone out there!
Wow found this video and this helps so much! After my miscarriage I started exhibiting symptoms of thought OCD and I started to realize it was because of the lack of control I had during the miscarriage. It rocked my world and brought back all kinds of trauma I suffered. Crazy how the mind keeps score of everything! Thank you for this video!
Thank you SO much Christina. Of all my years of getting counseling and seeking advice, this is the video that did the trick. I've been told for so many years to 'just let it go' or 'just get over it', but no-one ever showed me how. It's not like I wanted to hold onto it, I just didn't know how to move forward, I really worked so hard to let it go, but I continued to get triggered by someone doing something. Since watching this yesterday, I've had SO many epiphanies and even my dreams have been enlightening. It's like a thick fog has finally lifted. Thank you 💖🙏💖
I came across your channel by mistake. But after listening to you it was no mistake!! That was so powerful!! Thank you so very much for this video. I took notes! But I’ll be listening to this video again to be taking more notes. I am so grateful. Thank you 💞🙏🏻💞
You have no idea how much this means to me. I actually had to paus several times because I started crying. I will watch this again and again. Even though I only watched it one time I could feel a shift in my energy field and in my body. Thank you sooooo much for posting this! I am beyond grateful and blessed that I found you! 🙏🏻❤️
I'm 2 years late! But time has no meaning. Thank you Christina. You've been guiding me for 2 months and slowly but surely I'm understanding all the why s. I am grateful to you and the universe for bringing you here for all of us wandering Souls
She is a beautiful soul! I just saved a whole lot of money on therapy sessions. And I got a whole bunch of ideas to fix this issue. And didn’t need meds Thank you 🙏🏽
Beyond grateful for your work. I was just asking to understand why I can't let go of control & boom....your video came up. Wow...now I get it. Thanks for helping and explaining things so well. You are a blessing. ✌💖🌞
I love this!! Yes it does come from childhood, I lived in a very toxic and abusive home. I’m an only child so I had no one to lean on during those times. I’m very controlling in many ways and now realize why. Thank You for sharing this, it really opened my eyes and I’m willing to let go and trust no matter how long it takes to get there ❤
On and on you confirm what I innately know, thank you. As a very injured empath who has suffered great loss it is good to know there are others who get it, the spirit and what a journey it has been, I used to feel so alone seeing signs feeling energies around me and seeing them, no one to speak with about it who wouldn't think Me crazy but I also know I am never alone and when a soul comes onto your path who gets it, it is so refreshing to be able to share spiritual awareness...so thanks again Christina, isn't it all so amazing!!!!
I have had a lot of obsessive tendencies that started in young age and gradually got more severe as I got older. Eventually it got to the point where I would think how did I even get here. You've helped me to gain a new understanding that hadn't dawned on me until now: I did not feel safe in my home growing up, which led to having all these obsessive tendencies. Having been raised by a narc parent, I was constantly walking on eggshells. I realize now how obsessing was just a way to try and be in control. Thank you, namaste.
Thank you so much, this is the most helpful video I have seen on this topic. It explains how all I ever wanted to do was organise my bedroom when I was a little girl, never play with toys. You have helped me get to the bottom of why I am struggling so much with surrendering to the universe right now. I can now take baby steps in the right direction xx
Wow, Christina this is me also. Literally bullied at school; elementary, middle, and early high, and I didn't feel safe at home either. I am 48 years old and have lived alone pretty much my entire adult life up until 3 years ago. My awakening started 2015. I moved in with my partner 2016 and left my job 2 and 1/2 years ago(thinking we were moving and then didn't) and stayed unemployed and wow did a bunch of stuff come up. I was completely controlling, feared intimacy, have never trusted anyone and had NO IDEA. I was very social, pediatric nurse by day, fronted a band by night, but always went home ALONE and felt very safe there, ALONE. I've been stuck not being able to go near my partner when he's on his technology (which is ALL DAY LONG) and have not been able to figure out why this was intimidating me so damn much. And today in meditation it came up. My inner child drowning in feeling unsafe basically in such close quarters to another person. I can't find an exact memory but I suspect it's because feeling safe became the normal everyday sensation. Thank you so much for this video! And for all your content you share. You've been helping me through my awakening immensely. Gratitude and blessings to you!
This is a sign for me righy this moment. My relationship reached breaking point because both of us had trust issues. I am the sane one. But when i got triggered, it all came crashing down. I took some time, healed my wounds. Now we are bacj together and taking thinga slow and nice. I was having this urge to jump up and down, call or text. But i know in my heart, that's not right, now at least. This video popped up. I am trusting the Universe, I'm trusting the process. Either it will be good or better. Thank you Christina.❤
I cried out of nowhere right at the end when repeating the I am safe mantra. I think I'm learning why I have an wounded inner child and trauma that I thought was completely healed is coming to the surface. I love you Christina. Thank you for shining your light and wisdom through RUclips. Sending you love and light.💜🙏💜
Unbelievable I had this question running on my head today and I just cried out, why cant I have a beautiful relationship and why is it not working for me...and here comes the answer...universe is so beautiful we need to stop and read, thank you Chritina it was great help. I am going to do it...
Omg the closet and relationship addiction comments shook me....I feel emotionally empty as you talked about this....thank for being so transparent....I need this right now
HI I AM HONORED TO HAVE GOTTEN THIS AWESOME MOMENT OF LISTENING TO YOUR VIDEO AND RECEIVING ALL THE DIVINE KNOWLEDGE THAT I NEEDED IN THIS MOMENT. I TRULY WANT TO SAY THANK YOU. I TRULY BELIEVE THAT YOU ARE SOURCES DIVINE EXCELLENCE ON THE PLANET EARTH IN THE HERE AND NOW . KEEP ON WALKING WITH THE EARTH ANGELS. YOU ARE A DIVINE AWESOME AND AMAZING,BEAUTIFUL SPIRIT GUIDE. DIVINE BLESSING FOR YOU AND ALL YOUR LOVED ONES .
I’ve just watched “Black Swan” and realize how much I identify with the movie, specifically with the White Swan, and how this strive for Control and Perfection was rooted in Fear. Anyways, your video gave me the light that I needed, I’m definitely putting into practice. Tysm. ❤
Thanks for being honest and real. Unpleasant childhood, loss of a parent and more Fear of then Belief in God led me to wanting control too much, Despite knowing God had done other miracles For me. It is a process. I plan on teaching what I have learned the hard way. 🙂
You confirmed a lot for me. Thank you. In January i got onto "lightworker" topic while researching narcicists in my life. I was led from there to wanting and getting help, found YOU and healers who could help me. I wanted to know what narcissists were, what makes them tick and maybe i could manage being around them.(nope). Had no idea how big the problem really was. Omg. How damaging, why i was feeling the way i did, that there is a recovery behind all the trauma i experienced. Didnt even realize there was trauma. What a relief to have "terminology" and definitions which described my experience. I hadn't RUclipsd much prior to this. Now i was and am a youtuber freak! The journey led me to healers and others which has been a huge part of me getting well. Through this process I've uncovered past experiences, discovering new things about myself. Im back on my spiritual path. Im seeing life in a whole new way. Hard to believe that the darkest time of my life, when i thought the light would never be back, brought me to some amazing people (here and in real life, too) and experiences i wouldnt trade for anything. Thank you, Light Healer🙅♀️
Whatever u have gone through in your life I have gone through the same . but at times ur videos helped me to get back myself . Thanks Christina for being there for me always .
@@ChristinaLopes This isn't particularly about me being controlling but a possibly altered perspective that most people are to me. I would like to say my situation is rather complex and the following is only really a partial portion of what I have facing me right now. ... I'm dealing with a predicament that I believe could be easily resolved. My father and I have been living with each other on and off and on the same land at least in 2 different locations for most of my 28 years of life. I recently know I've messed up bad and I mean bad. I was going to throw out some trash which involved my piss jugs that I had since I was living in my travel trailer and didn't want to go outside at night to urinate being I had to put all my clothes on belt, walk outside in the poor weather multiple times a night due to health reasons. I also suffer from (not diagnosed yet) CPTSD from trauma related to jail guards and the system. I do at times hide from the world in my travel trailer so this also contributes to the piss jugs as I don't even want to go outside and I don't have water hooked up in my travel trailer yet... Now where it gets bad is my dad actually when I went to take that garbage out I had a few of my piss jugs in the basket where today on the Fourth of July he had to empty them out and then throw them away bring it to the dump and as you can tell already this is really sad. I talked to him today without even really seeing the severity of this until I got to my travel trailer and thought about what i had said. Being that "Oh gary when he was here he'd play these stupid games with you when you were the mouth that feeds" which was my cousin and his nephew that used to try and walk on him when he was being helped by my father. So this obviously looks like a poor attempt to excuse myself by comparison. And also I said that the garbage cans were full that's why I wasn't able to deal with it properly. And he said at least I could've emptied out the piss jugs but instead I left them there. He didn't even seem that angry it just looked like disgust as it should have. Not trying to excuse anything but the most underlying issue within myself that I've noticed is huge trust issues. Something I've been reluctant to fix. I believe that being in jail where they would force me into a restraint chair and I would urinate on myself cause I couldn't get to the hole in the ground (solitary confinement) they would then wreslte me to the floor and strip me of my clothes and then throw towels in there telling me I had to clean up my own urine if I wanted the padded clothes to be warm. That was only a very short explanation of what had all happened but this is what I've been faced with dealing with between being in there with them and the mental health professionals playing mind games with me so damn much. Now I feel as if when my father asks or tells me to do something it's in a controlling type of way and I'm unsure if it really is sometimes. But most of the time I feel like that's what's happening and I read too much into peoples facial expressions thinking they are laughing cause they got away with controlling me in some way. I've grown past a lot of this . but this for me seems to be my biggest... Hurtle in dealing with these easy to do every day things. And to make the situation worse. For some reasons I'm unsure about but he had his friend move in with him and his friends daughter. And now it feels to me like they are making a point to "Look were here in your space haha" by their body language etc. I've had this happen where my dad makes a point to tell me that even though the place is in his name that it's actually mine as soon as we get financially stable and he sells his other property blah blah. But I won't go into that. He tells everyone it's mine, he tells them it's mine. Then his friends or whatever will show up, right in the middle of me and... Him talking and then they'll stare at me and then sit down and he'll just start talking with them even though me and him were just there talking to each other. And I asked "Are we going to finish our conversation or?" He replies "no I'm talking with my friend right now" Of course I don't understand this. I do feel walked on. But I try to see where he's coming from as well I try to reason with all of it, and do my best but simply he's just exhausted at this point and just flat out disapointed. Dealing with all these things makes me wanna retract more and I've talked with him a few times now the best way I coujld without making him feel attacked in any way. Now I almost feel like the people around us now is out of spite for a few days before this all happened with the garbage I got angry with him. Telling him I can't help but to be that way when I feel pushed around Eventually speaking. I bottle it up instead of talking cause I don't know what else to do, then I explode. And this makes him angry probably cause he feels like he does nothing but help me. The whole picture is a little more complicated. So what do I do just suck it up and bend over when he demands I do things, or maybe I can talk to him after this blows over and ask if he could talk to me in a different way that helps me understand that it's ok. But then again that seems selfish even though it's not it's for the both of us. I'm still trying to figure out how to convey myself without him feeling attacked. I think I would need to just do things before he even asks that way this isn't even a possiblity. But I've had instances where people talk about things that happened the night before almost like they were watching me do them. So now I feel taken advantage of even when people might not even really be around. And that prevents me from even doing anything even in my own travel trailer cuz it feels like they are watching me or having me do something. Not sure what I can do to remedy all this and not feel controlled while keeping him happy so he doesn't get up and leave me high and dry and then I'm stuck in an even worse spot
Wow, hit the spot; exactly when I had a “aha” moment last night about why I can’t seem to be able to relax not even while meditating. Thanks so much for contributing in my next step towards a better me.
Dysfunction in family means unsafe home environment. Feeling unsafe leads to controlling personalities as you've nowhere to go. The lower mental patterns are getting developed. Lack of trust is caused by lack of safety. As time goes by, ego develops more. One can be a very controlling adult if not taken care of.
Thank you so much for this. It’s really helpful cuz I been through a really rough childhood and and the drama when I was young this video makes me understand the situation I am in and how to get by it. Really helpful please keep doing what do are doing, I am so glad the universe or god or who ever sent you beautiful soul. Thanks 🙏🏼
I've watched this video many times. My heart felt opened and accepting to the words "I AM" I feel those words are a great way to feel more grounded as well. Thank you.
💖😭😭😭😭😭 thank you so much🤗✨ and now i know why... Now i can work on it. Im trying so hard not to cry at work. Oh well im crying..Releasing control jus hit my spirit very heavy. Thank you thank you thank you. You were my answer to my question. Namaste to you. Very POWERFUL!✨🌠🌺💖
I appreciate you you giving the appropriate I AMs to use for this! I did feel incredibly unsafe at home. I lost my ability to trust anything. I've asked my guides to help but I didn't know what to ask until now. Thank you!
U are so right with the signs Ms Christina! When I asked for these also wayback in 2018 I already had a lot of signs and they'd showed up through my dreams and even on the objects around me like the walls, the cloud formations and the trees. Most of the guide I have been given really amazed me so much. Like we have here in front of our porch beside the road, a huge narra tree that I always look at but I never noticed anything on it, until one day came I was extremely emotional and I even cried about a certain life issue I was dealing with, then I asked for a sign so that I could understand it better. I was a bit uncertain at the moment and the scared feeling was there again. So I asked for this sign. And when it was noon, I went out and then I looked at the sky and to the narra tree. And to my surprise I saw this ostrich shape that was so vivid out of the tree bushy leaves. Then I had the strong feeling that maybe this was the sign I was asking for that morning. So I googled it, and to my surprise again, the meaning was indeed telling me the answer I was looking for in me with my issue and my uncertainty to make a move over that issue. And since then I had been paying attention already to signs and I consistently would ask for it when I don't exactly know what to do with my serious emotional concerns.
My childhood was just great but have been leading a very difficult life from last many years and that has changed my personality completely. I don't trust anyone or anything. I have many negative emotions in me which I want to get rid off.
Thankyou so much Christina everything you said made sense to me, that has helped answer so many questions from my own childhood, I trust now that I am safe I am not that frightened little child anymore and I am a strong women I trust in God my Guides & Angels around me & my partner who is my rock & soulmate, friends mentors & now in myself thank you God bless you.
Thank you yet again Christina, another beautifully delivered lesson. Also thank you to the universe for guiding me to this video. Trust and control were 2 words I received in meditation and this morning this video appeared on my suggestions list. I am willing to learn how to trust and the universe is constantly delivering evidence of why trusting and letting go of control is such a beautiful thing. Thank you 🙏
This is me, to a T. I never felt safe and I still don't. The damage that parents and caretakers do to the small child is TRAGIC. It's sad to see what happens to a us when neglect, guilt and shame are embedded into that perfect little human. :( I pray for healing, so that I can live the life I'm meant to live. Bless you Christina, for your compassion. Namaste 🙏
Has anyone besides me seen a pattern where people like us had unsafe childhood environments? I was born with extra senses and I’m an extroverted sensitive which made life even harder. I’m still recovering, so thank God for videos like this to put some things into perspective.
So rich and thanks for your informative knowledge it has been very encouraging. I am at a crossroads of letting go of wounds that have tired me and now at this pivitol time I can now TRUST
This is really powerful and puts words to many things I feel. hearing your message makes me certain of connection to source as you speak my truth, your truth, the truth. Thank you
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You can feel her passion to help and heal people.
Yes, I just thought before opening this video, how her videos have helped me in only 10 days. I think that she knows that peoplw who are awakening, might have financial crises, too, as a temporary symptom of the process, and she gives so much free support in her videos. She is indeed a genuine helper.
Yes exactly!
I told myself these positive affirmations about safety and security for a very long time. But whenever triggers came up, it was like my inner child forgot ALL about it. The mantras didn't work at all. It wasn't until I relived the painful memories **on an emotional level** that I finally rewired the instinctive reactions. My psychologist called it a major "corrective emotional experience". Turns out that one requires not only 1) recollection of a painful memory, 2) a logical re-write of the inner narrative, but also 3) emotional arousal to unlock access to that drive. Without the last component, the emotional part of our brains remains inaccessible, and you can't actually force yourself to believe a new logical narrative only by rationally repeating it to yourself. Embracing the discomfort and painful feelings is the KEY to rewriting the narrative. I used to avoid pain and discomfort like the plague, repressing it even further, controlling even more aggressively. Now I take long walks, dive into the emotions, and hide in an alley to cry my eyes out if I have to. The only way out is through. And there is so much joy awaiting on the other side.
Michelle - this was so insightful. I'd love to speak with you and learn more about how you worked through this - If you could provide any advice that would be amazing.
Michelle Ferng makes so much sense
You had to open up your heart to heal, and then also the hurt came out. Either you open your heart or you dont, and then the pain also was felt. Right?
That is absolutely spot-on. I've been doing EFT for years, on and off, working on all sorts of personal; things, and usually I will succeed most when I manage to really feel triggered by the topic. Tears, real anger, real frustration, fear etc. I thought I was really "tough" and open to change, but I found out that I had been avoiding the very darkest recesses of my experience. The real challenge is addressing the parts you absolutely don't want to even get close to.
❤ thank you 😊
Control is a result of a trauma response. I can predict the bad before it happens, perhaps no bad things will ever happen again. But the key is trusting that if something painful does happen, you will heal and move forward.
Sometimes control issues do not begin as a child , as an adult you meet a man or a woman who lies to you and does some shady things behind your back with and you find out , you never be the same any more , you don’t trust anybody anymore. The next relationship you get in you become low key controlling
We can still trust. Just develop discernment skills, and begin to feel what is better for you. Like Christina's video pearl, the Universe provides signes. See them, know them, and become wealthy with trust.
The "go with the flow" is your own control. You got this, even as an adult. :-)
Yes! I just commented this! I feel like this happened in my marriage.
Betrayal is hard to overcome
Read.
Research.
You tube.
I was 14 years old too
Im now 33 i love meditation✌
Night
It's still hard I get afraid of being taken advantage of or taken for a fool, or having the wool pulled over my eyes. Or having someone trying to take over my life and control me in small increments before I realize it. I grew up in a very dysfunctional fearful environment. A deep understanding has helped create more awareness. But I also used to detach if I feared something and realized this wasn't a good coping mechanism. So even as a long time married man I fear losing my spouse and get fearful very easily. It's so annoying. I have overcome many fears but still do not trust anyone's motives whatsoever.
Jms, I 100% hear you and relate due to similar circumstances. Baby steps. The most powerful thing is to become our best ally by which we rise, heal, calm down. Namaste Brother 🎊🙏🦋
@@marchiespianoschool3800 I'll take that to heart thank you
@@jms4406 🌈🌷🤗🌍💌 You are never alone!
⭐⭐⭐
I’ve been dealing with the same fears . Afraid someone will get over on me because it happened so much in the past and now I just make things worse because I can’t relax. Thanks for sharing. It’s nice to know someone understands what this feels like
Pray for wisdom to discern n clarity....
Wow!. I wasn’t even going to watch this video because I didn’t think it would be useful to me and then I found myself crying. Eye opening. Thank you 🙏🏽❤️
"I am" definitely takes practice. I've been shifting to "I am" and away from speaking to myself in a "you are" or "you should" narrative. I feel more empowered this way, rather than letting my shadow control me.
Aloha Christina! I love that you brought up listening to the communications from nature. Before I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2000, I had many angelic visitors from nature that pointed me in the direction of "getting a mammogram." One such incident stands out in my mind that I would love to share with your listeners. I was a massage therapist in Kona, Hawaii. While massaging poolside at a lovely hotel, a bee kept buzzing around my head. I smiled because I know he was trying to tell me something. I wasn't sure what...later when I was bringing my equipment back to the office, two bees buzzed me, with one actually diving down my shirt and stinging me. All of a sudden I heard the words, "Go get a mammogram!!" I did...and was diagnosed with an aggressive breast cancer. Those sweet little bees helped to save my life. There's never a time that I don't pay attention to nature with her constant messages of one thing or another. Thanks so much for this video and your sharing. Much appreciated!
Beautiful best wishes
May you be healed soo. Best wishes.🍀🙏
I am willing to learn how to trust, I am willing to let go of control ♡
Your so real and clear. Keep doing what your doing. Great job!!!
i don't know why my tear jerks at the end..... i have never cried in front of youtube video before nor that i cry about anything but last few words you give some how send a warm feeling down my body and there is a word that pop up in my head "you are back home" it feels almost like some higher being is telling me that. Thank you, Christina
I wish i could tell you how much you helped a struggle of mine. I give you the kindest most grateful thankyou
The end of this video brought me to tears. You’re such a gift ❤️
She is changing so many lives and bringing so much positive love energy. I LOVE YOU!!
Dear Christina, you precisely named the reasons for this condition, I cried when remembering my childhood, thank you for your help! your videos are the best!
I have lived in a constant state of unease, and have struggled with trusting and having faith for as long as I can remember. Thank you for sharing the “Why”. I hope to heal whatever wounds I have and aspire to achieve peace in my life.
Brilliant this is. I was abused as a child and my family was dysfunction!
The healing and learning journey is always working in progress. I feel myself is like a book, lots of information inside my body to dive into.
Christina,
you made my day and absolutely are changing my life. i found myself in the why i have become controlling and i had to be put with my back towards the wall by my wife who separated me 2 months ago. i was keep looking at her and what she did wrong until i stopped and look into myself and found myself in need on improving my own flows. i had a dream last night, for the second time, that i was dying after been in a car. the first was by myself and the second was with a friend of mine. while in the first one i was in control of the car, i lost it and falling from a big cliff i could see that i had no chances of surviving, in the second "accident" that i was not in control of the car i bounced of but i could not see if i actually died or not. That made me think more about controlling and that something need to change and trusting more. than i saw your video and i found the root of the problem which is actually what you mentioned. been bullied at young age and going home and hear my parents fight all the time. i want to change myself and trust more the universe and thank you for making this video. will be forever thankful.
I’m so grateful I came across this video today.
Yes, I totally control myself. I hold myself tight and can’t relax.
It wasn’t circumstances in my own life that caused this but actually my mother told me over and over to be like her and trust no one.
I’m now in middle age and while I do trust some, though I can be wary and judgmental of others, the one person I can’t trust...is me.
My spirit guides are speaking to me thru you :-)
I have heard three times. To STOP TRYING 😭😭. So blessed to have found this video
I was sitting in meditation this afternoon after I watched your Intuition video and I could feel myself doing the most and overthinking. My Spirit Guides told me to let go and relax. I came out of my meditation defeated cause I couldn’t let go. I even said to myself *sigh* “you tried”. Then a few hours later I opened RUclips back up and THIS VIDEO popped up on my feed!! I am shocked because right before my meditation and watching the intuition video, I scrolled way down in your video list and didn’t see this video! After I saw this pop up I dropped my phone on the table and cried. I felt so seen by God and so guided by my Spirit Guides. Like they were helping me and rooting for me to succeed! ❤ thank you Christina, your videos have impacted me in such a positive way words can’t explain what you have done for me❤❤
Another fantabulous video! Thank you for answering the "whys". I am so grateful to have your support! I also had an extremely unsafe childhood with the perpetrators being the majority of family. No one to turn to but myself. At 5 years old my trust in God was destroyed when l was beaten so severly .l was in ICU for over a month with a police officer on duty round the clock. I am just now slowly gaining trust back in the Universe, God . lt has been 48 yrs... it helps me alot to exchange the word God for the word Life . Eg. "I am willing to trust in Life again. I hope this helps someone. Much love to everyone out there!
Wow found this video and this helps so much! After my miscarriage I started exhibiting symptoms of thought OCD and I started to realize it was because of the lack of control I had during the miscarriage. It rocked my world and brought back all kinds of trauma I suffered. Crazy how the mind keeps score of everything! Thank you for this video!
Thank you SO much Christina. Of all my years of getting counseling and seeking advice, this is the video that did the trick. I've been told for so many years to 'just let it go' or 'just get over it', but no-one ever showed me how. It's not like I wanted to hold onto it, I just didn't know how to move forward, I really worked so hard to let it go, but I continued to get triggered by someone doing something. Since watching this yesterday, I've had SO many epiphanies and even my dreams have been enlightening. It's like a thick fog has finally lifted. Thank you 💖🙏💖
I came across your channel by mistake. But after listening to you it was no mistake!! That was so powerful!! Thank you so very much for this video. I took notes! But I’ll be listening to this video again to be taking more notes.
I am so grateful. Thank you 💞🙏🏻💞
You have no idea how much this means to me. I actually had to paus several times because I started crying. I will watch this again and again. Even though I only watched it one time I could feel a shift in my energy field and in my body. Thank you sooooo much for posting this! I am beyond grateful and blessed that I found you! 🙏🏻❤️
I'm 2 years late! But time has no meaning. Thank you Christina. You've been guiding me for 2 months and slowly but surely I'm understanding all the why s. I am grateful to you and the universe for bringing you here for all of us wandering Souls
She is a beautiful soul!
I just saved a whole lot of money on therapy sessions. And I got a whole bunch of ideas to fix this issue.
And didn’t need meds
Thank you 🙏🏽
Dear Cristina
Your honesty and genuineness shines through your face and words!!!!!!!
Beyond grateful for your work. I was just asking to understand why I can't let go of control & boom....your video came up. Wow...now I get it. Thanks for helping and explaining things so well. You are a blessing. ✌💖🌞
I love this!! Yes it does come from childhood, I lived in a very toxic and abusive home. I’m an only child so I had no one to lean on during those times. I’m very controlling in many ways and now realize why. Thank You for sharing this, it really opened my eyes and I’m willing to let go and trust no matter how long it takes to get there ❤
I am yessss! Regarding trust,I say I trust myself a little more everyday ♥️
On and on you confirm what I innately know, thank you. As a very injured empath who has suffered great loss it is good to know there are others who get it, the spirit and what a journey it has been, I used to feel so alone seeing signs feeling energies around me and seeing them, no one to speak with about it who wouldn't think Me crazy but I also know I am never alone and when a soul comes onto your path who gets it, it is so refreshing to be able to share spiritual awareness...so thanks again Christina, isn't it all so amazing!!!!
Yep! Sad & lonely feeling
Perfect! My wife will be very happy that I have started working on this. Thanks for the foundation.
I Am worthy of being loved
I have had a lot of obsessive tendencies that started in young age and gradually got more severe as I got older. Eventually it got to the point where I would think how did I even get here. You've helped me to gain a new understanding that hadn't dawned on me until now: I did not feel safe in my home growing up, which led to having all these obsessive tendencies. Having been raised by a narc parent, I was constantly walking on eggshells. I realize now how obsessing was just a way to try and be in control. Thank you, namaste.
Thank you so much, this is the most helpful video I have seen on this topic. It explains how all I ever wanted to do was organise my bedroom when I was a little girl, never play with toys. You have helped me get to the bottom of why I am struggling so much with surrendering to the universe right now. I can now take baby steps in the right direction xx
Wow, Christina this is me also. Literally bullied at school; elementary, middle, and early high, and I didn't feel safe at home either. I am 48 years old and have lived alone pretty much my entire adult life up until 3 years ago. My awakening started 2015. I moved in with my partner 2016 and left my job 2 and 1/2 years ago(thinking we were moving and then didn't) and stayed unemployed and wow did a bunch of stuff come up. I was completely controlling, feared intimacy, have never trusted anyone and had NO IDEA. I was very social, pediatric nurse by day, fronted a band by night, but always went home ALONE and felt very safe there, ALONE. I've been stuck not being able to go near my partner when he's on his technology (which is ALL DAY LONG) and have not been able to figure out why this was intimidating me so damn much. And today in meditation it came up. My inner child drowning in feeling unsafe basically in such close quarters to another person. I can't find an exact memory but I suspect it's because feeling safe became the normal everyday sensation. Thank you so much for this video! And for all your content you share. You've been helping me through my awakening immensely. Gratitude and blessings to you!
Many many thanks. I've been threw 20 years of therapy and NOTHING got into my psyche as this did. Beautiful soul, thank you
This is a sign for me righy this moment. My relationship reached breaking point because both of us had trust issues. I am the sane one. But when i got triggered, it all came crashing down. I took some time, healed my wounds. Now we are bacj together and taking thinga slow and nice. I was having this urge to jump up and down, call or text. But i know in my heart, that's not right, now at least. This video popped up. I am trusting the Universe, I'm trusting the process. Either it will be good or better. Thank you Christina.❤
I'm so glad you've identified these tricky places. I'm so grateful, it makes sense of my chaotic life.
Best.Video.Ever.
You saved me from a mental breakdown!
I understand myself now.
I have tools.
I cried out of nowhere right at the end when repeating the I am safe mantra.
I think I'm learning why I have an wounded inner child and trauma that I thought was completely healed is coming to the surface.
I love you Christina. Thank you for shining your light and wisdom through RUclips.
Sending you love and light.💜🙏💜
I am safe, I can trust life. thank you for this beautiful video, It's heart opening.
Unbelievable I had this question running on my head today and I just cried out, why cant I have a beautiful relationship and why is it not working for me...and here comes the answer...universe is so beautiful we need to stop and read, thank you Chritina it was great help. I am going to do it...
Same thing happens to me its a deep subject
Omg the closet and relationship addiction comments shook me....I feel emotionally empty as you talked about this....thank for being so transparent....I need this right now
HI I AM HONORED TO HAVE GOTTEN THIS AWESOME MOMENT OF LISTENING TO YOUR VIDEO AND RECEIVING ALL THE DIVINE KNOWLEDGE THAT I NEEDED IN THIS MOMENT. I TRULY WANT TO SAY THANK YOU. I TRULY BELIEVE THAT YOU ARE SOURCES DIVINE EXCELLENCE ON THE PLANET EARTH IN THE HERE AND NOW . KEEP ON WALKING WITH THE EARTH ANGELS. YOU ARE A DIVINE AWESOME AND AMAZING,BEAUTIFUL SPIRIT GUIDE. DIVINE BLESSING FOR YOU AND ALL YOUR LOVED ONES .
I’ve just watched “Black Swan” and realize how much I identify with the movie, specifically with the White Swan, and how this strive for Control and Perfection was rooted in Fear. Anyways, your video gave me the light that I needed, I’m definitely putting into practice. Tysm. ❤
I broke out in tear hearing this because I really want to release this . Thank you for this . I love your spirit
I'm so thankful I found you😭😭😭😭 keep doing what you do!!.. I love you Sistar 💗💗💗💗
Thanks for being honest and real. Unpleasant childhood, loss of a parent and more Fear of then Belief in God led me to wanting control too much, Despite knowing God had done other miracles For me. It is a process. I plan on teaching what I have learned the hard way. 🙂
You confirmed a lot for me. Thank you. In January i got onto "lightworker" topic while researching narcicists in my life. I was led from there to wanting and getting help, found YOU and healers who could help me. I wanted to know what narcissists were, what makes them tick and maybe i could manage being around them.(nope). Had no idea how big the problem really was. Omg. How damaging, why i was feeling the way i did, that there is a recovery behind all the trauma i experienced. Didnt even realize there was trauma. What a relief to have "terminology" and definitions which described my experience. I hadn't RUclipsd much prior to this. Now i was and am a youtuber freak! The journey led me to healers and others which has been a huge part of me getting well. Through this process I've uncovered past experiences, discovering new things about myself. Im back on my spiritual path. Im seeing life in a whole new way. Hard to believe that the darkest time of my life, when i thought the light would never be back, brought me to some amazing people (here and in real life, too) and experiences i wouldnt trade for anything. Thank you, Light Healer🙅♀️
It is important we learn to trust what the universe/God has aligned us with. Sometimes, all we need to do is simply let go and go with the flow.
The phrase "I am willing" is so powerful. Willing doesn't just mean "I am open to" something. Willing. Your will. To will. Intention.
You are such a beautiful soul. You described my childhood. Now I understand many things.
Whatever u have gone through in your life I have gone through the same . but at times ur videos helped me to get back myself . Thanks Christina for being there for me always .
You are absolutely amazing person (teacher)😊 thank you very much. love and light 😍
OMG! That little girl was me! Thank you for this video! I think my guides wanted me to hear this. "Trust" is the topic of today for me.
❤️❤️
@@ChristinaLopes This isn't particularly about me being controlling but a possibly altered perspective that most people are to me. I would like to say my situation is rather complex and the following is only really a partial portion of what I have facing me right now. ... I'm dealing with a predicament that I believe could be easily resolved. My father and I have been living with each other on and off and on the same land at least in 2 different locations for most of my 28 years of life. I recently know I've messed up bad and I mean bad. I was going to throw out some trash which involved my piss jugs that I had since I was living in my travel trailer and didn't want to go outside at night to urinate being I had to put all my clothes on belt, walk outside in the poor weather multiple times a night due to health reasons.
I also suffer from (not diagnosed yet) CPTSD from trauma related to jail guards and the system. I do at times hide from the world in my travel trailer so this also contributes to the piss jugs as I don't even want to go outside and I don't have water hooked up in my travel trailer yet...
Now where it gets bad is my dad actually when I went to take that garbage out I had a few of my piss jugs in the basket where today on the Fourth of July he had to empty them out and then throw them away bring it to the dump and as you can tell already this is really sad.
I talked to him today without even really seeing the severity of this until I got to my travel trailer and thought about what i had said. Being that "Oh gary when he was here he'd play these stupid games with you when you were the mouth that feeds" which was my cousin and his nephew that used to try and walk on him when he was being helped by my father. So this obviously looks like a poor attempt to excuse myself by comparison. And also I said that the garbage cans were full that's why I wasn't able to deal with it properly. And he said at least I could've emptied out the piss jugs but instead I left them there.
He didn't even seem that angry it just looked like disgust as it should have. Not trying to excuse anything but the most underlying issue within myself that I've noticed is huge trust issues. Something I've been reluctant to fix. I believe that being in jail where they would force me into a restraint chair and I would urinate on myself cause I couldn't get to the hole in the ground (solitary confinement) they would then wreslte me to the floor and strip me of my clothes and then throw towels in there telling me I had to clean up my own urine if I wanted the padded clothes to be warm.
That was only a very short explanation of what had all happened but this is what I've been faced with dealing with between being in there with them and the mental health professionals playing mind games with me so damn much. Now I feel as if when my father asks or tells me to do something it's in a controlling type of way and I'm unsure if it really is sometimes. But most of the time I feel like that's what's happening and I read too much into peoples facial expressions thinking they are laughing cause they got away with controlling me in some way. I've grown past a lot of this . but this for me seems to be my biggest...
Hurtle in dealing with these easy to do every day things. And to make the situation worse. For some reasons I'm unsure about but he had his friend move in with him and his friends daughter. And now it feels to me like they are making a point to "Look were here in your space haha" by their body language etc. I've had this happen where my dad makes a point to tell me that even though the place is in his name that it's actually mine as soon as we get financially stable and he sells his other property blah blah. But I won't go into that. He tells everyone it's mine, he tells them it's mine. Then his friends or whatever will show up, right in the middle of me and...
Him talking and then they'll stare at me and then sit down and he'll just start talking with them even though me and him were just there talking to each other. And I asked "Are we going to finish our conversation or?" He replies "no I'm talking with my friend right now"
Of course I don't understand this. I do feel walked on. But I try to see where he's coming from as well I try to reason with all of it, and do my best but simply he's just exhausted at this point and just flat out disapointed. Dealing with all these things makes me wanna retract more and I've talked with him a few times now the best way I coujld without making him feel attacked in any way. Now I almost feel like the people around us now is out of spite for a few days before this all happened with the garbage I got angry with him. Telling him I can't help but to be that way when I feel pushed around Eventually speaking. I bottle it up instead of talking cause I don't know what else to do, then I explode. And this makes him angry probably cause he feels like he does nothing but help me.
The whole picture is a little more complicated. So what do I do just suck it up and bend over when he demands I do things, or maybe I can talk to him after this blows over and ask if he could talk to me in a different way that helps me understand that it's ok. But then again that seems selfish even though it's not it's for the both of us. I'm still trying to figure out how to convey myself without him feeling attacked. I think I would need to just do things before he even asks that way this isn't even a possiblity. But I've had instances where people talk about things that happened the night before almost like they were watching me do them. So now I feel taken advantage of even when people might not even really be around. And that prevents me from even doing anything even in my own travel trailer cuz it feels like they are watching me or having me do something.
Not sure what I can do to remedy all this and not feel controlled while keeping him happy so he doesn't get up and leave me high and dry and then I'm stuck in an even worse spot
This video, like all of your others, has been so immensely helpful! We are so lucky to have you Christina, thank u!!
❤❤
Wow, hit the spot; exactly when I had a “aha” moment last night about why I can’t seem to be able to relax not even while meditating. Thanks so much for contributing in my next step towards a better me.
This is me!!! I am seriously trying to break out of my trust and control issues and just let things flow.
Dysfunction in family means unsafe home environment. Feeling unsafe leads to controlling personalities as you've nowhere to go.
The lower mental patterns are getting developed. Lack of trust is caused by lack of safety. As time goes by, ego develops more. One can be a very controlling adult if not taken care of.
I was bullied at school and home. I had no where to go to feel safe. This really hits home.
Im soooo glad ive found you. Right place right time. Thank you so much xxx
Thank you so much for this. It’s really helpful cuz I been through a really rough childhood and and the drama when I was young this video makes me understand the situation I am in and how to get by it. Really helpful please keep doing what do are doing, I am so glad the universe or god or who ever sent you beautiful soul. Thanks 🙏🏼
Everything is spot on ... The accuracy is almost terrifying... Wow
Hello Christina ... i experience what you expressed in words so bueatifully. Freedom from the matrix is such a phenomenal experience.
🙏
I'm crying watching this
You are a truly amazing lightworker! Thank you for all your positive messages and tips for leading a more fruitful life!
On a binge lately watching your videos. I’m very happy I found you. Your videos are just what I needed.
I've watched this video many times. My heart felt opened and accepting to the words "I AM" I feel those words are a great way to feel more grounded as well. Thank you.
You are so right! I have become controlling and now I know why. Makes total sense, thank you!
Source flows through and with you. Thank you for this wisdom!
This information is golden people need to hear you ma'am I send U BLESSINGS & SHALOM
💖😭😭😭😭😭 thank you so much🤗✨ and now i know why... Now i can work on it. Im trying so hard not to cry at work. Oh well im crying..Releasing control jus hit my spirit very heavy. Thank you thank you thank you. You were my answer to my question. Namaste to you. Very POWERFUL!✨🌠🌺💖
Thank you for being you Christina. My twin flame and I are grateful. I am grateful.
Much much love your way. This helps to know that we are not alone in our dysfunctional patterns and were able to find support in each other
I appreciate you you giving the appropriate I AMs to use for this! I did feel incredibly unsafe at home. I lost my ability to trust anything. I've asked my guides to help but I didn't know what to ask until now. Thank you!
I AM WILLING to give this a try. I will keep you posted.
U are so right with the signs Ms Christina! When I asked for these also wayback in 2018 I already had a lot of signs and they'd showed up through my dreams and even on the objects around me like the walls, the cloud formations and the trees.
Most of the guide I have been given really amazed me so much. Like we have here in front of our porch beside the road, a huge narra tree that I always look at but I never noticed anything on it, until one day came I was extremely emotional and I even cried about a certain life issue I was dealing with, then I asked for a sign so that I could understand it better.
I was a bit uncertain at the moment and the scared feeling was there again.
So I asked for this sign.
And when it was noon, I went out and then I looked at the sky and to the narra tree.
And to my surprise I saw this ostrich shape that was so vivid out of the tree bushy leaves. Then I had the strong feeling that maybe this was the sign I was asking for that morning.
So I googled it, and to my surprise again, the meaning was indeed telling me the answer I was looking for in me with my issue and my uncertainty to make a move over that issue.
And since then I had been paying attention already to signs and I consistently would ask for it when I don't exactly know what to do with my serious emotional concerns.
My childhood was just great but have been leading a very difficult life from last many years and that has changed my personality completely. I don't trust anyone or anything. I have many negative emotions in me which I want to get rid off.
Thankyou so much Christina everything you said made sense to me, that has helped answer so many questions from my own childhood, I trust now that I am safe I am not that frightened little child anymore and I am a strong women I trust in God my Guides & Angels around me & my partner who is my rock & soulmate, friends mentors & now in myself thank you God bless you.
A beautiful and huge thank you, Christina! You opened my eyes and made me realize the core reason of many issues in my life. Thank you! God bless you
Thank you yet again Christina, another beautifully delivered lesson. Also thank you to the universe for guiding me to this video. Trust and control were 2 words I received in meditation and this morning this video appeared on my suggestions list. I am willing to learn how to trust and the universe is constantly delivering evidence of why trusting and letting go of control is such a beautiful thing. Thank you 🙏
This is me, to a T. I never felt safe and I still don't. The damage that parents and caretakers do to the small child is TRAGIC. It's sad to see what happens to a us when neglect, guilt and shame are embedded into that perfect little human. :( I pray for healing, so that I can live the life I'm meant to live. Bless you Christina, for your compassion. Namaste 🙏
Thank you i struggle with this. Im going to repeat this every morning.
Full steam ahead. you have definitely started The Light in me again I truly believe in you so very much so. Thankfully you are you. Peace forever
I like you. You're wise, compassionate and genuine. Thank you.
You are infinite, thank you for being my sign!
Why am i in tears ! Thanksss
Has anyone besides me seen a pattern where people like us had unsafe childhood environments? I was born with extra senses and I’m an extroverted sensitive which made life even harder. I’m still recovering, so thank God for videos like this to put some things into perspective.
Yes, because I believe in the law of attraction, I believe I can control everything which gives me ocd. I wish I didn’t know the loa
So rich and thanks for your informative knowledge it has been very encouraging. I am at a crossroads of letting go of wounds that have tired me and now at this pivitol time I can now TRUST
Thank you so much! You have no Idea how thankful I am for your video! 💕
What a beauty message, I definitely needed to hear all of that. I am going on a beautiful journey to learn and let go of control. Thank you
This is really powerful and puts words to many things I feel. hearing your message makes me certain of connection to source as you speak my truth, your truth, the truth. Thank you
What a wonderful explanation about control. It helped me a lot! Thanks.
Yessss Why???
Yep I have been controlling but it has been transforming over the past few years. I can hardly recognize myself.