Brandon's Cult Movie Reviews: DEATHSTALKER 2
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- Опубликовано: 9 янв 2023
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Time to kick off 2023 with the sword & sorcery sequel "Deathstalker 2" from director Jim Wynorski!
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All this and Deathstalker too!
Love the content. You’re my favourite Canadian.
This was a more entertaining review of Deathstalker 2 than those hacks from Milwaukee did.
title drop, kinda
Great channel guy. Just found out a few days ago. I highly recommend making a video on hysterical. I think it was made in late 70s early 80s but it is actually a really funny movie but also crazy enough for this show
That wrestling chick was actually pretty famous back in the day for glow or some crap
Princess Evie: You came back!
Deathstalker: By popular demand
That could be the same said about Brandon Tenold.
Except I didn't get played by a different actor.
@@TheBrandonTenold ... yet
"She also brought his trusty sword: Excalibro!" Dammit, Brandon, I just spit up my California smoothie all over my newly waxed surfboard.
Deathstalker: "So you really think our story's gonna make it into the legends?"
Evie: "Oh, more than that! A thousand years from now, players will reenact all our exploits!"
Narrator: "This kingdom was forgotten in three hundred years."
Is that really the line? Lol
No, I was just riffing. 🙂
A surfer version of Conan...
-Conan, what is best in life?
-The waves, dude.
"Rippin a curl,
hangin' ten,
and paddling back out waiting for the next one, bro."
"Queen Kong Bundy": Deanna Booher, professional wrestler and actress, aka Matilda the Hun on the Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling (GLOW), aka Queen Kong. Passed away a year ago, RIP
It's funny that as much as i loved GLOW, this movie is the first thing i thought about her upon announcing her death!
Oh, the memories!
I was a kid when GLOW was on and it only came on late as hell on Friday nights. My mom was always mad that I was up late, but it was the weekend so she had no leverage t make me go to bed. In my city, they also played POWW (Powerful Women of Wrestling). POWW was more wrestling focused. GLOW had all the comedy, skits, and of course the camp. I watched both and wanted to be a wrestler so bad. We had lots of backyard wrestling sessions on the trampoline. This was pure 80's "kids doing stuff that can break bones" fun!
I remember that some of the women went to POWW when glow ended. I always thought if Netflix's GLOW hadn't ended, they get into mentioning POWW.
I thought that was her!
They had a documentary about the ladies before the new Netflix series was released and Matilda's main rival, Mt. Fiji was in very poor health. She actually had a big crush on the promoter and announcer, but she never really told him until they met for a reunion. Booher herself was dealing with some health issues and said she had to have three toes amputated on one of her feet.
Some good memories of the completely ridiculous show. I had a crush on The Farmer's Daughter and both Hollywood and Vine.
Deathstalker 2 is the best unofficial spoof movie ever made. The wink at the camera moments, the sly reveal of certain characters, and Renee the Seer's line delivery.
Yeah, kinda like the "Your Highness" of it's day. But better due to the merciful lack of James Franco.
Deathstalker you’re back!
…by popular demand.
Love this fkn movie
I'm surprised no one mentioned the crosses in the cemetery. How does this fantasy world have Christianity in it??!?!
@@AB0BA_69 They did that just because they thought it was funny. You have to listen to the commentary.
@@sr2340 You mean some of these movies are completely self-aware and just taking the piss? Now I'll have to buy a copy to watch :(
"There's only room for one smartass in this video." I cracked up with that line. Especially after "It is early!" from the movie itself.
This was easily my favorite cheesy fantasy flick from the '80s. Something I love about it is that it constantly seems like John Terlesky and Monique Gabrielle look like they can barely keep a straight face during all of the ridiculous dialog.
In some cases they DIDN'T keep a straight face!
@@TheBrandonTenold I can't figure it out: were these people were doing it just for a paycheck or was there any artistry in these movies?
I'm not saying movies NEED artistry to be interesting/fun, but this just seems like a lot of effort to just be a paycheck...
@@AB0BA_69 it's called fun. They had fun with it. Call it artistry if you want.
@@TheBrandonTenold Still waiting for Jack the Giant Killer (1962 one)
@@TheBrandonTenold As is further born out by the outtakes during the end credits. It looks like everyone involved was having a blast and a half making the movie, and it comes through on the screen because, as you said, it's pretty damn entertaining.
I gotta say the the two main leads seem to had fun, their chemistry is so evident
It feels like they might have gotten up to some shenanigans together while making the film.
In the director's commentary, they said she was a diva and kind of a pain in the ass. Deathstalker was having fun though.
Deathstalker II has the best “movie title said within the movie” of all time. And a Jim Wynorski movie, always a fun time.
Still not as good as the Title Drop in the video game Evil Within 2.
When it’s not killer robots in a shopping mall with decapitating lasers, gotta love 80s cheese horror and fantasy films.
Not fellowship?
Honestly, I wish the zombie graveyard attack scene had a bard-core cover of Thriller playing in the background.
Deathstalker II not taking itself seriously was what made it a genuinely fun film. The best part was the end credits where there's a blooper of Monique Gabrielle doing a sex scene, topless, and some of the crew starts laughing. She calls out "No laughing!", but she's totally smiling while saying it. There's just something so wholesome about fun sleaze!
There are SEVERAL bloopers at the end of the film! Terlesky grabbing a torch in the zombie scene, then dropping it, yelling "DAMN, THAT'S HOT!"" is only one of them
Now I really wish that Roger Corman had made a Deathstalker sequel where the different Deathstalkers meet, fight, and then eventually team up.
And fight Miles O'keeffe, and the other guy who played Ator. LOL There can only be ONE!
Deathstalkers, Assemble!
Like when Deadpool meets up with his alternate universe selves.
Yes
"Fighting with his "FUCK THIS GAME, I QUIT!" technique." I love that. Going to use that.
Flipping the table, was how my dad and uncle usually finished their chess matches back in the day.
Rage Quit Fu.
I laughed too hard at that🤣
@@AndrewGivens EPIC COMMENT WIN
One of those rare sequels that are so much better than its predecessor.
It's so much more fun!
"Murder is not tubular" needs to be a Brandon Tenold shirt design 😂
I gotta make some "Footage Flagged By Toho" shirts first
Ah, my favorite Deathstalker movie, finally get to hear Brandon crack few jokes about it.
I find it so funny that Conan ignited an entire craze of movies, and has become a joke itself. But people forget that Conan was actually a really well done movie. It’s just that when they think of Conan, they’re actually thinking of Deathstalker or Krull.
I think that the princess is actually extremely cute when she delivers her dialogue so awkwardly.
Sondra scream....did porn too
Indeed, specially on the scene where he catches Death stalker and the Queen having sex, "It's my bed for crying out loud!" cute and funny
Throwing in Blood Rave for the techno-resurection was absolute perfection. Chef's kiss
Monique Gabrielle has that perfect level of just good enough at acting that her hotness makes up for the rest. Pretty much the "Oh, I didn't realise I was speeding but can you let me off this time?" kind of girl.
Deathstalker morphing from a stoic barbarian to a thief to something else entirely from movie to movie is actually pretty faithful to sword and sorcery's roots in RE Howard's Conan stories. Conan was a king in one story, a thief in the next, a pirate after that, then a mercenary captain, and so on.
For years this movie reigned supreme as my favorite movie ever, and I must've watched it hundreds of times.
Gotta love how Monique's whole concept of acting is to raise and lower her eyebrows a bunch while talking!
I actually like her performance. She's got a very expressive face, and isn't afraid to play the parts "big." For this kind of movie, she's perfect.
I never noticed if she can act. But she’s always been one of my favorites.
Worked for Emilia Clarke!
I think she took acting cues from the guy in Silent Night Deadly night 2. The Garbage day guy. 😃
@@joevaughn9241 lol! She probably watched that movie and was flabbergasted at just how awesome he was! ;)
Monique Gabrielle, Bachelor Party. Every 80's/90's kid should know this one together with Phoebe Cates' pool scene from Fast Times At Ridgemont High.
What a coincidence, I just forced my friend to watch the first one with me on New Years Day. We had nothing to watch so I had a look at Prime and the cheesy 80's look of the first movie was too hilarious to pass up on.
"We're not actually watching all of it are we?" she said, not realizing we were half way through the movie already.
The art for all the movie covers is amazing
Was there for the MST3k Live Tour riff.
Laughed the hardest I ever did when the "ring girl round signs" happened in the Amazon part.
Wacky as this movie is, it does have one cool bit of dialog right before the final battle.
Deathstalker: "After tonight, I'll be a legend!"
Jirak: "Not a *living* one, I think..."
I've seen a couple reviews of this movie and I'm starting to think I'm the only person who noticed you could see the entire crew trailer park during the explosive assassin ambush.
You know I always want to see jonah and his robot pals riff this movie
Dunno shit about these movies, but that poster looks like a Boris Vallejo or Julie Bell painting. Their paintings fucking rock. Them and Frank Frazetta seriously know how to paint fantasy.
So if one dies the other dies, does anybody remember those twins on the GI Joe cartoon that felt each other's pain? They work for a Cobra Commander.
Tomax and Xamot, right?
Tomax and Xamot, their parents must have hated them from birth.
One has a scar, one doesn’t.
I also remember the twins from the movie Sorceress. They also felt what the other felt.
When he said that that was my very first thought,those guys rule great minds think alike.
It's about time we get a Deathstalker II review =) Also, Monique Gabrielle's acting is super cute. You can tell she's having a good time being in a cheesy fantasy movie.
Looks like they shot an adult movie with the left over film. 😂
Given the director.....
when you said "Excalibro" I immediately thought of "Excalibrate" and had a look at your channel to see if you'd covered it. Unbelievably you haven't. It's known by a few names: 'The Dungeon Master', 'Ragewar: The Challenges of Excalibrate', and 'Digital Knights'. It's pure Tenold fodder which we'd love to see you cover!
Also, Axecalibur also exist. Modern day low budget horror version. :/
It's also a player community nickname for Warframe players who main Excalibur.
Good news: he just did.
*sadly only knew about Dungeonmaster because of Sword Art Online: The Abridged Series*
I keep forgetting that I have watched this movie, start it again every few years and realize it is possibly the greatest late night stoner movie. No pretensions, maximum fun.
I understand and appreciate all the Beyond the Valley of the Dolls references. My kinda scene. Great video by the way. I always had a soft spot for The Death stalker movies . It's also funny if you imagine each movie as a D&D campaign with different DMs every time and it's the same player rolling up the same character but with different stats and playing him differently each time.
DEATH STALKER!
YES!!!
This is the sort of '80s Video Rental Store Cheese' I come to this channel for!
It would be completely believable if this Deathstalker and the one from the first movie were actually different individuals with the same nickname.
Her talent is so incredible she had 2 of them And she was always waiting them around in your face
She does have two of them but they are above her eyes.
@@michaelthomas5433 🤯he has 👀??? I guess I was too distracted by her 🦉🦉
@@marcelmoreau2733 If she could move her hooters like she does her eyebrows she would be a talent indeed.
@@michaelthomas5433 she has eyebrows too? Nexf uou're gonna claimshe has a nose.
@@marcelmoreau2733 Sure.
15:45 I was expecting Blade to pop out of nowhere and start katana-fighting some people.. I'm extremely disappointed that this did not occur.
So glad this movie got reviewed. This was among my top wishes for the show ever since AVGN briefly covered it a decade ago.
First BCMR of 2023!
So far, the only "Deathstalker" movie I ever saw was the original with Rick Hill (who ironically came back for "Deathstalker 4: Match of the Titans"). I first heard of these movies from James Rolfe, who reviewed each movie in one video. This definitely looks to be the funniest of the bunch. And this one is double packed with the first Deathstalker on Blu-Ray, so this would make one hell of a "double feature".
I appreciate the fact that Deathstalker wore pants for the majority of this movie. That actor does not have the physique to pull off the wrestling-trunks look...
I really wish more of these unknown 80's fantasy movies were...better. I love the genre, and I wish there were more movie in it that I could enjoy un-ironically.
Ok I laughed harder than I should have at the "excalibro" joke.
Deathstalker was one of the knights of the rad table
Brandon, dude, I am really pissed off. I do NOT understand why you don't' have a million subscribers. You're the best kept secret on youtube. Never stop!!!!!!!!!!!
Hey, don't blame me! Tell all your friends & help me get to a million!
"Amazons. Theyre like Ewoks, but hotter"
spilled my coffee.
Loved these type of movies growing up, cheaply made but a blast to watch and probably to make. Wish the industry would cycle back around where more studios would take risks to finance any filmmaker with an idea and some passion, instead of re-making blockbusters again and again.
5:26 Deathstalker: "You got to get up pretty early in the morning to catch the prince of Thieves."
Mike from MST3K: "Oh he's talking about Aladdin the other prince of Thieves."
Arrow flies past deathstalker. Crossbow shooter appears in the background.
Tom Servo as Crossbowman: "Hey do you guys mind I'm playing William Tell."
6:01 that should be the name for your new t-shirt you should make.
6:07 Crow: "Wait she's making of Zelda reference in a fantasy movie how does that work."
14:20 Mike: "Stand by for spit-take. Spit-take away."
" That's a look that says damn magic eye picture, why can't I see it " snerk.... oh wait , Brandon's doing this review... I mean snark. Seriously this review had me laughing quite a bit. He was in great form for this one. 🤣🤣🤣👍👍
I was JUST out to lunch with my fiancé saying how I hope Brandon uploads today. Time to smoke and chill. Love ya Brandon. Keep up the great work.
When they're surrounded and Stalker half heartedly hits that one guy's sword, it made me chuckle.
Id never heard of these movies until I watched the Mystery Science Theater episode about the 4th one. (Warriors from Hell) to this day it's one of my favorite episodes. The jokes are top-notch. AND, Death stalker is played by John Allen Nelson who I recognized as "Paul the wine guy" from the pilot episode of Friends.
Extra points for New Order's Confusion at 21:56 :)
First Brandon video of the year, and it lands on my birthday! Another great looking movie I must watch!
Thank you good Sir. A Canadian prince of sarcasm.
Keep up the great work.
@10:08 I never realized how difficult it was for Garden Gnomes to find work. Gotta take it where you can find I guess, so if you have to take work as a living radio, then that’s what you gots to do. (LOL)
6:20 I love how the parody sequel of the Conan cash-in actually uses the correct pronunciation *glares at Nerdstalgic*
I'm pretty sure that this is supposed to be the same Deathstalker, since the third movie has this line:
*Deathstalker:* "Why am I always getting mixed up with princesses?!"
*Crow T. Robot:* "Ah no, this is a sequel to somethin'!"
My guess is that he's actually a timelord, changing actors and personalities everytime he dies while retaining his memories.
Maybe giving these silly movies too much credit, but perhaps they were going for myth/legend style continuity where stories about the same hero are retold over the centuries and become full of contradictions and inconsistencies.
I have to find this one now looks hilarious. Side note I knew i recognized the main actress. She is in Silk 2 RLM did a best of worst on couple years back. I always remember, “she acts with her eyebrows” her facial expressions are great.
Excellent video 👍 Three cheers for the Prince of Snark!
Love this movie! Also worth mentioning are the outtakes during the credits - the crew making Monique laugh during the sex scene gets me every time. :D
Happy New Year Brandon. Best movie blog on RUclips!
Whenever the topic of "movies that are way better than they have any right to be" comes up, this is one of my go-to responses.
Years ago I wound up with the Death Stalker box set!! That was the best $3.79 I ever spent, because, they are all good for laughs. Yes, they still used scenes from part one in part four. 😂
Deathstalker 2 is a great movie. Its plot is no worse than the 80's movies that took themselves seriously and the self awareness just elevates it above them.
I watched CHOPPING MALL, another Wynorski outing, recently, and when John Terlesky showed up in it, I was like: "I know him from somewhere..." 😅
Thank you Brandon, for keeping it funny as fuck and sarcastic. 80s Sword N Sorcerery movies rule.
I loved this movie. The fun they were having was contagious.
One of my all time favorite movies. I can watch it on repeat. Giving this movie crap is weird though because it never for one second takes itself seriously. It knows exactly what it is.
I laughed so loud when you said the calling me collect joke😂😂😂
At least for me, in today's world, this movie is wholesome fun. Who would have ever thought
I got to say Brandon, one of your better videos that you’ve done in a good long while, the quality is always tiptop, but this one was extra special
This was the most hilarious review of the most hilarious movie I can remember 🤣🤣🤣
Great review but now I'm really curious about that grim hint of what is next. Also I really want to see a Keanu Reeves Conan. I've often said we should research the multiverse to create a market for dvds from alternate timelines, see how the casting turned out or the other production differences. Plus infinite multiverse means infinite more Brandon's making reviews.
I love what you do man!! You take me back to the days of scraping up change to go rent a movie as a kid. B movies are the best!!
Gotta love Sword and Sorcery flicks
Thank you for continuing this series
If you think people won't get the reference, just remember the immortal words of Joel Hodgson.
"The right people will get it."
I don´t know why but this must be the Brandon´s review that I rewatch the most. I´ve already seen it about 15 times... The silly premises, the actors who are at goofing all the time (but still very enjoyable), the many story arcs that are suddenly abandoned for no reason... and the awesome jokes that Brandon´s always brings!
This Deathstalker actor feels like a proto Ryan Reynolds. I should probably sit down and watch this movie at some point. Looks fun!
I like him more than reynolds.
I like how Deathstalker just wears driving gloves, because someone liked their old cars and the costume budget was 10 bucks.
I love how they're drinking from modern day glass pint glasses in the bar 🙄
"Like Robin Hood, or ... Bernie Madoff." I appreciated that. You eventually need to tackle Deathstalker III, if only because it features starlet Carla Herd who would go on to have a dubious political career -- shocking, I know, with such a movie in her resume. And, yes, you really do need to do Beyond the Valley of the Dolls, especially if you're going to refer to it so much. Thanks, BT -- and happy 2023!
I saw MST3K riff this movie live. Glad to see someone else drawing some attention to it!
Didn't they watch the 3rd one "Warriors of Hell"?
@@theblocksays yeah, deathstalker 3 was one of my top10 favorites of mst3k.
Hey Brandon! You were really on your game with this one! ⭐🙂👍
Wooooo! First new Brandon Tenold review of 2023!
When you remember that the OG Conan in the books had a couple of Indiana Jones type adventures way before Lucas even conceived the said character. Lol
I think the best thing about this is I found out there are two more frickin' sequels... ugh.
Took me long enough to get these two on bluray since they're out of print.
With an Evee having around, I guess Deathsatlker just pokevolved.
That made me laugh! : )
Roll on no 3 and 4 reviews...... I've seen them. They make the first 2 films look like absolute masterpieces....... ✌
I've got fond memories of this movie. It was all the right kinds of b-movie schlock. Nice thumbnail, too.
"This is my happening and it freaks me out!" is literally the only thing I know about Beyond The Valley Of The Dolls. Aside from it being written by Roger Ebert.
This is some of your best work, for sure.
And now I really want to see this.
Yes, please review Beyond the Valley of the Dolls. This was a fun movie for what it was and was a go to at my local video rental store.
Thank you so much. I watched this last week again for a refresher. One of my favorite guilty pleasures. So much cheese, so much fun!!
10:05 "Anyway, what are the villains doing?"
I don't know, because an ad popped up the second you said that.
BRANDON!!!!!! Great to see you again!!!!