Unlikely lines from a romantic novel | Mock the Week - BBC

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  • Опубликовано: 15 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 114

  • @johnnychin
    @johnnychin 10 лет назад +427

    Andy Parson's M&S joke was brilliant.

    • @Gongasoso
      @Gongasoso 9 лет назад +5

      What's M&S?

    • @johnnychin
      @johnnychin 9 лет назад +50

      Gongasoso M&S is Marks & Spencers, a British departmental store. They had a fpod campaign previously that played on the word S&M because it was similar to their name.

    • @hip2thabone_da_sticky1
      @hip2thabone_da_sticky1 5 лет назад

      @@Gongasoso en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marks_%26_Spencer

  • @untidyecho9916
    @untidyecho9916 5 лет назад +190

    'As he slid into her, she moaned 'UNEXPECTED ITEM IN THE BAGGING AREA' '

    • @kylestubbs8867
      @kylestubbs8867 3 года назад

      Where is that one? I'd really like to hear it again.

  • @nicholasseaks95
    @nicholasseaks95 8 лет назад +153

    love the Nando's bit. It's like it's from a romance novel for normal people.

  • @grahambretman4010
    @grahambretman4010 Год назад +9

    Watched this many times just for Gary's flushing angrily joke, brilliant

  • @johnblobbylauder2866
    @johnblobbylauder2866 10 лет назад +84

    hugh dennis customs officer brilliant

  • @markt1387
    @markt1387 5 лет назад +50

    "This is the last time we can be together. Have you anything to say?"
    "Unexpected Item In The Bagging Area...".

  • @Brownalebelly
    @Brownalebelly 4 года назад +6

    The delivery on that last one was perfect

  • @tompengelly8030
    @tompengelly8030 4 года назад +20

    That last joke about Mr Darcy almost made me cackle at work. XD

  • @chrisjasper3289
    @chrisjasper3289 6 лет назад +21

    Hugh Dennis = Legend

  • @curiousgemini
    @curiousgemini 6 лет назад +12

    Those Custom agents are pretty thorough.

  • @WardyLion
    @WardyLion 6 лет назад +17

    Having been apart for so many years, Helen couldn’t contain her joy at seeing her love again and flung herself into his arms, crying: “Oh, John! I’ve missed you so much! My heart ached every day we were apart and I have dreamed of this day for so long!”
    John held her close for a moment before stepping back and replying: “Oh, Helen...you haven’t half let yourself go!”

  • @connieallen6804
    @connieallen6804 7 лет назад +22

    "Heavily into M&S" AHAHA IM DEAD

  • @jeanmichellelaurent
    @jeanmichellelaurent 7 лет назад +146

    He kissed up from her ample thigh to her toned flat stomach. Silence and then he heard the sweet words of “I’m sorry sir but that mannequins are for display only” coming from the shop clerk

  • @frankydave
    @frankydave 4 года назад +2

    Hugh bloody kills it there. Gary as well.

  • @RyanKravesGaming
    @RyanKravesGaming 8 лет назад +84

    I'm afraid many people disapprove of our relationship so we can no longer be together. Good bye . Europe

  • @davidshulimson9491
    @davidshulimson9491 Год назад +1

    I don't think I've seen anyone make Parsons and Romesh break character like Hugh's customs joke did.

  • @eamonahern7495
    @eamonahern7495 5 лет назад +9

    That last one! 😂

  • @edwardkinsey5680
    @edwardkinsey5680 6 лет назад +14

    Dara and Ed looked into each other’s eyes.....

  • @kiraaisling9603
    @kiraaisling9603 5 лет назад +29

    1:35
    *god he loved being a priest*

  • @perfectlyfrank8
    @perfectlyfrank8 8 лет назад +45

    I laughed a bit too hard at the last one :D

  • @TheManOfManyNames373
    @TheManOfManyNames373 10 лет назад +72

    Here's mine.
    They gazed into each others eyes. Breaking the silence, she said "Oh John, you're like my best friend."

  • @KeithFraser82
    @KeithFraser82 10 лет назад +63

    Hugh and Romesh vying there for the Frankie Boyle Memorial Award for Most Wince-Inducing Joke...

    • @cyqry
      @cyqry 6 лет назад +9

      In fairness, I think Romesh took it this time, the pause as that sense of humour joke ticked into people's brains!

  • @mdntctyvlcn
    @mdntctyvlcn 6 лет назад +23

    She fell in love with him from the first moment he spoke to her: "It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again."

  • @paulpurves484
    @paulpurves484 2 года назад +2

    Gary owned that one

  • @adamedwards7520
    @adamedwards7520 2 года назад +1

    That first one made me heave - hysterical.

  • @AbdulRashid-do7yp
    @AbdulRashid-do7yp 6 лет назад +5

    hugh killed this one

  • @stuwiebentube
    @stuwiebentube 10 лет назад +41

    Ha ha Hugh's one :)

  • @timebomb4562
    @timebomb4562 4 года назад +4

    That baa at the beginning was brilliant
    I wonder if Hugh does any other barnyard noises

  • @ratherryan
    @ratherryan 10 лет назад +10

    Gary Delaney is hilarious in this XD

  • @just-tess
    @just-tess 8 месяцев назад

    1:44 Hugh's little arm swing though!

  • @jellyslopefall572
    @jellyslopefall572 4 года назад +5

    She couldn’t take her eyes off him. The colour she saw on his face and the shock from his words: ‘technical difficulties, please stand by’

  • @SuperMarioDWfan
    @SuperMarioDWfan 10 лет назад +17

    Hugh is classic!

  • @DJB0X3R
    @DJB0X3R 2 года назад +1

    “I will always love you (ewe).” “Baaa”

  • @zlee001
    @zlee001 6 лет назад +9

    flushed angrily. XDDD

  • @AllaMortify
    @AllaMortify 4 года назад +4

    As he waited for her in the restaurant, he began to wonder whether he'd made a mistake in coming straight from work. Her tinder profile had stated "no clowns" but surely she hadn't meant that literally?

  • @Johny40Se7en
    @Johny40Se7en 4 года назад +3

    That last one was a corker! =P

  • @aupaaupa2377
    @aupaaupa2377 Год назад +1

    Romesh just choosing violence

  • @sweiland75
    @sweiland75 9 лет назад +19

    I had to hear Romesh's second joke three times, before I got it.
    I am guilty of being a man.

  • @alanburge2725
    @alanburge2725 2 года назад +1

    Customs officer. All the jokes are great but that has to be the absolute winner surely.

  • @CliftonPhotographer
    @CliftonPhotographer 5 лет назад +2

    He gazed deeply and long into her eyes, unable to look away..... It was then that he realized he really had a thing for women with cataracts.

  • @tomm1102
    @tomm1102 10 лет назад +13

    That was proper funny haha

  • @stephenmurphy2212
    @stephenmurphy2212 10 лет назад +39

    A gay love story: Romeo and Julius!

  • @Gyarkify
    @Gyarkify 10 лет назад +12

    I don't get Romesh first joke about the young boy, someone explain.

    • @Gongasoso
      @Gongasoso 9 лет назад +5

      "Do you feel like Indian tonight, love?"
      "No, I feel like a young boy..."
      "... I knew you were weird, but this!?"
      /\ It's the same type of pun, I think, as this one /\

    • @kjamison5951
      @kjamison5951 6 лет назад +2

      The guy was so caught up in the moment with this woman that he recalled how good he felt when he was a young boy.

    • @BadWebDiver
      @BadWebDiver 5 лет назад +1

      It's a pedo joke...

    • @Me-fo1kk
      @Me-fo1kk 4 года назад

      Think...you are as old as you feel...ok (insert here..the man or the woman you are humping )

  • @Robman275
    @Robman275 6 лет назад +2

    Rob Beckett's joke about Alex Salmond suddenly became very topical.

  • @dearberlin
    @dearberlin 4 года назад

    Very nice set!

  • @AllaMortify
    @AllaMortify 4 года назад +15

    Nervously, he leaned in and kissed her. She seemed a little cold. Her pale skin, as white as milk was flawless. The embalmer had really outdone himself this time.

  • @sherrieanderson505
    @sherrieanderson505 8 лет назад +15

    Romeo, Romeo where art thou Romeo?
    "I'm down here you blind bitch"
    She pondered the events of the previous night. Never before had she realised that the hardest part of eating a vegatable would be the wheelchair.

  • @shaunpenne1840
    @shaunpenne1840 5 лет назад +1

    Elizabeth Bennett's eyes widened as Mister Darcy emerged from the lake dripping wet, needless to say a few moments later the feeling was mutual!!!

    • @Me-fo1kk
      @Me-fo1kk 4 года назад +1

      Must say I saw that scene that was so overblown in hype. Did nothing for me.

    • @shaunpenne1840
      @shaunpenne1840 4 года назад

      @@Me-fo1kk I think it's the dual wedding scene at the end, where we can see that Colin Firth has an impressive set of love spuds in his trou, that got a lot of women talking. As a guy, I didn't notice until my girlfriend at the time (back in '95!) pointed it out! Ever since, the pendulistic swaying of Colin Firth's pan handle has haunted me, much in the same way that Ned Flanders tight ski suit haunts Homer!!😬😬😬😬😬

  • @chrisgarton4225
    @chrisgarton4225 5 лет назад +2

    Oh Romeo oh Romeo, where for art thou Romeo? I’m not kidding where the heck are you?!

    • @gwishart
      @gwishart 4 года назад +1

      It's actually "Wherefore art thou Romeo?"; it's an enquiry into the existential reason for identity, not location.
      Wherefore means "why".

    • @harrywhite9030
      @harrywhite9030 4 года назад +1

      @@gwishart shut up

  • @AlexBlexAleb
    @AlexBlexAleb 10 лет назад +2

    i remember this from yesterday LOL

  • @ChrisCatton
    @ChrisCatton 10 лет назад +4

    What is Romesh referring to when he talks about the person "not watching her drink"?

    • @EA369
      @EA369 10 лет назад +20

      Roofies, date rape drug you put in someones drink.

    • @ChrisCatton
      @ChrisCatton 10 лет назад

      I thought it might be a particular event or person.

  • @annanbjhfbjdhfmxnbfvj8447
    @annanbjhfbjdhfmxnbfvj8447 8 лет назад +4

    Sarah's love made him feel like a young boy again. which is why he went out to find one

  • @citywitt3202
    @citywitt3202 5 лет назад +1

    1:29
    😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @anthonymichaeleardley494
    @anthonymichaeleardley494 Год назад

    3:28 🤣🤣🤣

  • @ItsAsianTV
    @ItsAsianTV 8 лет назад +1

    what's the one about Shaun

  • @laksyy
    @laksyy 6 лет назад +1

    Last one 😂👏

  • @Nulono
    @Nulono 4 года назад +1

    I don't get the locket joke.

    • @jzsl.02
      @jzsl.02 3 года назад +1

      A locket (or lockets) is also the name of a cough sweet in the UK

  • @ronitchatterjee5430
    @ronitchatterjee5430 5 лет назад

    What's the point of the buzzer

    • @BadWebDiver
      @BadWebDiver 5 лет назад +4

      Signal the comics to swap or finish.
      Once he got angry at someone and buzzed them before they could speak! :D

    • @chrishanson9748
      @chrishanson9748 3 года назад +3

      @@BadWebDiver At Andy Parsons, for his joke about "And it's gold (medal) for Ireland!", he buzzed him out every time he tried to do something.

  • @Wrenn_NYC
    @Wrenn_NYC 10 лет назад +7

    I can do that one better.
    Lines REMOVED from a now published romance/erotic novel. (I was the editor doing the removing.)
    1) "Cocks Thrashed"
    (I keep a list.)

  • @wakefieldtrainlad340
    @wakefieldtrainlad340 7 лет назад +7

    I love your eyes, your beautiful face and cute little nose, eh... no not you I'm talking to the dog!

    • @just-tess
      @just-tess 8 месяцев назад

      haha Hugh did that one on Valentine's cards SWLTS!

  • @catherinegalvin8471
    @catherinegalvin8471 5 лет назад +1

    As he walked in on his girlfriend with another man all he could think of was back to when he’d being coming out of his cage and he’d been doing just fine

  • @Nulono
    @Nulono 4 года назад +2

    I don't get the cough sweet joke.

    • @shirokumaotaku
      @shirokumaotaku 3 года назад +3

      Because a locket it is also another word for a pendant that you can put something special inside
      It's kind of like a play on word joke

    • @powderedground78
      @powderedground78 Год назад +1

      Lockets are a brand of cough sweet.

  • @jakamneziak
    @jakamneziak 8 лет назад +3

    'close your legs love your meet smells' *female voice* 'it keeps the flies off me chips!'

  • @alvindimes4729
    @alvindimes4729 4 года назад +2

    Slowly passionately our lips 💋 met, then she crossed her legs and broke my glasses.

  • @UKsingh1313
    @UKsingh1313 4 года назад

    69 dislikes 🤣

  • @Monkey80llx
    @Monkey80llx 4 года назад

    Parsons voice is not only annoying but it never changes, no matter what he’s saying. 🙄

  • @Agnethatheredhairkid
    @Agnethatheredhairkid 6 лет назад +1

    Unlike most women on this show, Sarah Pascoe was actually funny.

  • @Haaris.Qureshi
    @Haaris.Qureshi 10 лет назад +2

    That joke about abusing sexual harassment claims was made in very poor taste, I think.

    • @KeithFraser82
      @KeithFraser82 10 лет назад +2

      I didn't take it that way - I assumed the scenario in the joke was one of genuine sexual harassment where the harasser got what he deserved.

    • @Haaris.Qureshi
      @Haaris.Qureshi 10 лет назад

      ***** Even by this show's standards.

    • @malteeaser101
      @malteeaser101 10 лет назад +10

      I thought the total opposite.

    • @Haaris.Qureshi
      @Haaris.Qureshi 10 лет назад

      I've been watching the show for ages, this still seemed poor taste even for their standards.

    • @colin76samp
      @colin76samp 9 лет назад +6

      That joke was tame compared to when frankie boyle was a regular, least they trying to keep things near the knuckle