Things you wouldn't read in a romantic novel | Mock the Week - BBC

Поделиться
HTML-код
  • Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
  • Subscribe and 🔔 to the BBC 👉 bit.ly/BBCYouT...
    Watch the BBC first on iPlayer 👉 bbc.in/iPlayer... The performers suggest things you wouldn't read in a romantic novel in Scenes We'd Like to See.
    Comedy show combining the best elements of panel show, stand-up and improvised games with two teams of comedians taking a satirical swipe at the news and world events.
    Dara O Briain and Hugh Dennis examine the events of the week.
    Mock the Week | Series 16 Episode 5 | BBC
    #BBC #MockTheWeek
    All our TV channels and S4C are available to watch live through BBC iPlayer, although some programmes may not be available to stream online due to rights. If you would like to read more on what types of programmes are available to watch live, check the 'Are all programmes that are broadcast available on BBC iPlayer?' FAQ 👉 bbc.in/2m8ks6v.

Комментарии • 426

  • @courtneybatchelor4014
    @courtneybatchelor4014 7 лет назад +3580

    The "unexpected item in the bagging area" literally made me laugh out loud

    • @Reyeoux
      @Reyeoux 5 лет назад +24

      No one expects the Spanish inquisition

    • @miscellaneous7777
      @miscellaneous7777 5 лет назад +5

      I didn’t get that one... can you explain?

    • @duncantalksalotmore5032
      @duncantalksalotmore5032 5 лет назад +20

      Clarissa Fray it is a common line you’ll hear from a self checkout kiosk in a supermarket.

    • @colonelkk
      @colonelkk 4 года назад +5

      Clarissa Fray In Britain automated checkouts at shops have a tendency to go “unexpected item in the bagging area” when you place something in the wrong place

  • @Liamtweedie
    @Liamtweedie 6 лет назад +4132

    "He put the Chocolates down beside her....Silence.....and then at last she spoke....unexpected item in the bagging aera"
    THAT IS HOW YOU DELIVER A JOKE! and Huge's delivery of the line make it too funny.

    • @jzaar7483
      @jzaar7483 6 лет назад +16

      I choked on my tea when he said that. ;3

    • @oldmanc2
      @oldmanc2 5 лет назад +10

      @@jzaar7483 Me too. But I had coffee from a shit bucket

    • @rustkarl
      @rustkarl 5 лет назад +2

      I blew the water I was drinking out all over the floor.

    • @jackdavids2723
      @jackdavids2723 5 лет назад +25

      Rustymcnut Manc Flyer Tirukinoko .... why do you people consume beverages while watching these videos?

    • @rustkarl
      @rustkarl 5 лет назад +25

      Jack Davids
      Cause I’m a thirsty boi

  • @henrikhyrup3995
    @henrikhyrup3995 7 лет назад +1852

    Ed's line at 2:45 is so simple but so unexpectingly funny. :D

    • @bartvandewalle4253
      @bartvandewalle4253 7 лет назад +189

      It's hilarious, but only because the deliverance is spot on. A minor god might have stumbled.

    • @GT_Walker
      @GT_Walker 7 лет назад +113

      Most jokes are about the delivery.

    • @themonsterbrat
      @themonsterbrat 6 лет назад +65

      Yes, and he had to wait quite long before he could say it!

    • @jaggass
      @jaggass 6 лет назад +37

      ''He was overcome by a huge sensation of arousal followed by a huge climax and then it was over. He had no idea that a hoover could give an amazing blowjob''

    • @commentconnoisseur1001
      @commentconnoisseur1001 5 лет назад +24

      The best thing about it is thatg he'd been waiting ages just to make that joke, because he kept getting beaten to the mic.

  • @jonathankern8857
    @jonathankern8857 7 лет назад +2055

    Christian grabbed Anastasia and whispered in her ear... what's the naughtiest thing you've ever done? Oh gosh, well I suppose when I was younger and we used to run through fields of wheat...

    • @GrijzePilion
      @GrijzePilion 7 лет назад +29

      Because this is a meme now.

    • @CyberLink70
      @CyberLink70 6 лет назад +5

      I don’t. Explain?

    • @drwhowhatwhenwhy1165
      @drwhowhatwhenwhy1165 6 лет назад +85

      James CyberLink Prime Minister tried to brush off a question asked in an interview "What was the worst thing you've ever done?" Or something of that sort, by saying that she ran though a field of wheat and the farmers may not have liked it.

    • @vincehgrutherford6184
      @vincehgrutherford6184 6 лет назад +17

      Out of everything out shitty prime minister could've said and she talked about wheat fields... I would've at least mentioned pigs... It's original...

    • @leehenry5764
      @leehenry5764 5 лет назад

      @@drwhowhatwhenwhy1165 corn field!

  • @margaritam.9118
    @margaritam.9118 6 лет назад +648

    Pride & Prejudice bit was spot-on 😂 I remember reading a book for the first time and thinking "Considering how much land Darcy owns, he must be compensating for something".

    • @yt-sh
      @yt-sh 5 лет назад +27

      yes loneliness

    • @amosw766
      @amosw766 3 года назад +2

      @@yt-sh fuckin yikes

  • @Finda5
    @Finda5 5 лет назад +380

    "when they left the bar she saw him in a new light. daylight, and he was disgusting"

  • @jalvesss
    @jalvesss 5 лет назад +186

    "When they left the bar, she saw him in a new light. Daylight. And it was disgusting"
    SAME

  • @Picnicl
    @Picnicl 7 лет назад +213

    This romantic novel round is possibly the best topic round I've ever seen on Mock the Week. Every gag and delivery was a total hit with many different themes.

  • @garyhill565
    @garyhill565 7 лет назад +390

    I like how Ed Byrne keeps gets beaten to the mic stand by someone else.

    • @samlee5549
      @samlee5549 5 лет назад +51

      Then, when he finally gets to the mic, he says:
      “I want to see you shit in this bin.”

    • @the_pigs_have_rebelled
      @the_pigs_have_rebelled 4 года назад +2

      Sam Lee lol

    • @cov9290
      @cov9290 3 года назад +4

      It reminds me of an old episode

    • @jrejoose
      @jrejoose 3 года назад

      @@samlee5549 I read this literally at the exact time he said it ahahaha

  • @britishrex5515
    @britishrex5515 4 года назад +30

    I love that all of them are coming up with witty puns and thought out jokes, yet ed saying 'i want to see you shit in this bin' was by far the funniest

  • @EnderPearlGirlHunger_Games_Fan
    @EnderPearlGirlHunger_Games_Fan 7 лет назад +36

    Nothing could've prepared me for "I want to see you shit in this bin"

  • @charlieloaf1772
    @charlieloaf1772 7 лет назад +827

    They need to get James Acaster on more, he is hilarious!

    • @burnbobquist8999
      @burnbobquist8999 6 лет назад +17

      He is, but i like both Ed's too. :D

    • @zakfrancis5352
      @zakfrancis5352 5 лет назад +4

      CharlieLoaf I don’t think he is but everyone else does😂

    • @xtheamazingax
      @xtheamazingax Год назад

      Well, took some time, but he did return!

  • @juwonolubanwo2778
    @juwonolubanwo2778 5 лет назад +73

    "Mr Darcy, you are so becoming".
    "Really", he said, "cause I think it's you that will be coming"
    High five!😉😉

  • @phunkymind23
    @phunkymind23 7 лет назад +581

    "She could not bare his loss any longer. No matter how hard she tried, grief would always get the better of her. Eventually, she had to move on and accept that Frankie will never come back."

  • @Prince__Teclis
    @Prince__Teclis 7 лет назад +91

    "Shit did I say that last bit out loud?" That's a problem I definitely suffer from.

  • @olliej.2776
    @olliej.2776 7 лет назад +224

    the best one is showing up to the first date in a wedding dress lmfao

    • @rainerwinkler6140
      @rainerwinkler6140 6 лет назад +10

      Ollie J. Your sense of humor is appalling

    • @vincehgrutherford6184
      @vincehgrutherford6184 6 лет назад +7

      Ollie J.
      Hugh Dennis and Ed Byrnes could be dead and still make better jokes.

    • @JamesSamson487
      @JamesSamson487 5 лет назад +8

      This just happened in The Bachelor Australia 2019.
      Wish I was joking...

    • @FirstnameLastname-es1ko
      @FirstnameLastname-es1ko 5 лет назад +27

      Rainer Winkler It was an *okay* joke. But maybe this person liked it. Humour is subjective, so you can’t tell someone theirs is bad.

    • @sophie2946
      @sophie2946 4 года назад +3

      @ollie it was my favourite too😂

  • @anzarne
    @anzarne 7 лет назад +82

    The daylight joke got me good.

  • @DianaMaeBabyGirl
    @DianaMaeBabyGirl 3 года назад +8

    I love how Ed either smiles or laughs right after he’s finished his jokes. And he’s hot

  • @AvantiHalfhorse
    @AvantiHalfhorse 5 лет назад +42

    MTW: "Things you wouldn't read in a romance novel."
    Master authors of the genre: Challenge accepted.

  • @JGGuitarCovers
    @JGGuitarCovers 6 лет назад +10

    "I want to see you shit in this bin" LMFAO I love Ed Byrne

  • @justNiko_91
    @justNiko_91 7 лет назад +64

    Ed's first joke has me howling 🤣

  • @thefudgestix
    @thefudgestix 7 лет назад +160

    Idk what people are bitching about, everyone was hilarious!

  • @NibberKSmooth
    @NibberKSmooth 7 лет назад +103

    'I want to see you shit in this bin'. The reaction that got tells me so much. We NEED more horrid humour.

  • @Keytaster
    @Keytaster 6 лет назад +110

    2:45 Ed Byrne caught me sooo much off guard, I actually fell off my chair and rolled on the floor squeezing my aching belly because I couldn't help laughing maniacally...

    • @obs4281
      @obs4281 6 лет назад +7

      Mason Starling that was overly dramatic. Bet you didn't even do that 👍

    • @RAFMnBgaming
      @RAFMnBgaming 6 лет назад +7

      What makes it better is how hard he tried to get on the mic before that.

  • @simonroendalsgaard1
    @simonroendalsgaard1 7 лет назад +277

    I get the criticism of Angela Barnes but Zoe Lyons has been consistently funny in all the clips I've seen.

    • @jonnnnniej
      @jonnnnniej 3 года назад +14

      Zoe is actually one of my faves, she rarely has a joke that doesn't land :)

    • @TheSongwritingCat
      @TheSongwritingCat 3 года назад +1

      Accurate

    • @wolfvandewerff502
      @wolfvandewerff502 3 года назад +19

      Dawn rises in serengeti, Dawn has absolutely no idea how she got there😂

  • @corriedebeer799
    @corriedebeer799 6 лет назад +22

    that becoming joke was golden.

  • @MisoForHipo
    @MisoForHipo 5 лет назад +19

    man literally waited 5 turns just to say "I want to see you shit in this bin" lmao

  • @Pie_minister_Sean
    @Pie_minister_Sean 7 лет назад +8

    Ed is so randomly hilarious. 'i want to see you shit in this bin'.

  • @StalkingYouMate
    @StalkingYouMate 7 лет назад +904

    A quick guide on how to get likes in the Mock The Week videos comment section:
    1. "Huw is carrying the show"
    2. "These new guys suck"
    4. "The women aren't funny"
    3. "Bring back Frankie"
    All of these guaranteed to get you a top comment

  • @myrin265
    @myrin265 3 года назад +4

    awkward struggles toward the mic like at 2:39 are honestly my favourite part of scenes we’d like to see

  • @raikaparzella
    @raikaparzella 6 лет назад +15

    The one with the bra had me laughing out loud 😂😂

  • @rustkarl
    @rustkarl 3 года назад +4

    Hugh’s bagging area joke was just perfect.

  • @kunaal_1928
    @kunaal_1928 7 лет назад +76

    The smile at 0:25

  • @ada4927
    @ada4927 6 лет назад +39

    People need to get over themselves and find a new show if they think this is crap. I personally think this is still a great show, even if all the classic ones are gone.

  • @MrKaywyn
    @MrKaywyn 2 года назад +5

    Ed Gamble's final joke is really worth waiting for.

  • @gj4312
    @gj4312 6 лет назад +30

    I want to see you shit in this bin was the most unexpected and hilarious thing I have ever seen.

  • @imbeingjudgemental644
    @imbeingjudgemental644 4 года назад +6

    1:15. I would've actually died if he said "unexpected item in the shagging area"

  • @India.H
    @India.H 5 лет назад +5

    "Well it does fulfill the criteria." Dara's face :')

  • @alial-timimy7917
    @alial-timimy7917 5 лет назад +6

    "I want to see you shit in this bin" LOL I wasn't expecting it that

  • @letseatgrandpa2905
    @letseatgrandpa2905 6 лет назад +3

    'I want you to shit in this bin' LAMO!! 😂😂😂😂

  • @config2000
    @config2000 7 лет назад +101

    When the night set in he cornered the girl and started kissing her passionately on the lips. Then, in a moment of discomfort he sensed a moustache and repelled in horror. Switching the bedroom light on he was relieved to see her doing a hand stand.

  • @chandlerkerr2190
    @chandlerkerr2190 7 лет назад +2

    2:45 Ed's deadpan expression and Dara's expression made this

  • @ellenkingsley
    @ellenkingsley 7 лет назад +16

    "He hung like a fucking cart horse" 😂😂😂😂
    "I want to see you shit in this bin" 😂😂😂😂

  • @alexinabox6931
    @alexinabox6931 6 лет назад +5

    The chuckle brothers one was gold.

  • @chorraykijuu
    @chorraykijuu 7 лет назад +78

    I'm from Kenya. but I love watching mock the week

    • @RNBisDOD
      @RNBisDOD 5 лет назад

      Nobody cares

    • @pharaya3757
      @pharaya3757 5 лет назад +6

      @Jack Tyrrell why'd you have to be so rude for

    • @erinkeegan5893
      @erinkeegan5893 5 лет назад +3

      Cobra Rising calm down

    • @RNBisDOD
      @RNBisDOD 5 лет назад

      @@erinkeegan5893 as u wish Lord Buddha 🙏

    • @erinkeegan5893
      @erinkeegan5893 5 лет назад

      Cobra Rising lmao

  • @thomassnowball6374
    @thomassnowball6374 7 лет назад +583

    I don't get all the hate, the women on the show were hilarious

    • @FooBarBash
      @FooBarBash 7 лет назад +22

      Really? Was anything Angela Barnes said funny?

    • @bartvandewalle4253
      @bartvandewalle4253 7 лет назад +91

      I think so, yes.

    • @Michylawhty
      @Michylawhty 7 лет назад +56

      Yup, plenty of stuff.

    • @Picnicl
      @Picnicl 7 лет назад +73

      Angela Barnes is great at delivery. Zoe Lyons was great here too.

    • @cov9290
      @cov9290 3 года назад

      They only have woman to stop the bbc from going out of budget

  • @ewanelliot5824
    @ewanelliot5824 5 лет назад +9

    0:52 top ten moments of British comedy

  • @sfoster.23
    @sfoster.23 5 лет назад +2

    ‘Daylight. And it was disgusting’ 😂

  • @nailarahman2420
    @nailarahman2420 5 лет назад +11

    I was just watching Ed Byrne trying to speak and getting beaten to to the mic😂

  • @acidwr10
    @acidwr10 4 года назад +1

    "I want to see you sh*t in this bin"
    😂 Spat out my tea

  • @antonymilne1346
    @antonymilne1346 3 года назад +5

    Anyone else wanna write a romance/comedy novel to include all these lines?

  • @theluckiesteh9058
    @theluckiesteh9058 7 лет назад +72

    Our first scene is.... "Likely RUclips Comments"
    Bring Back Frankie!

    • @joshuaprager786
      @joshuaprager786 7 лет назад +2

      TheOfficial AC98 or the women aren't funny

  • @youngdolo8
    @youngdolo8 7 лет назад +13

    0:53 and 2:46 are my favourite ones

  • @mariahtho5129
    @mariahtho5129 6 лет назад +18

    Most of these lines are probably in 50 shades

  • @versi7450
    @versi7450 5 лет назад +3

    His heavy package landed on the desk
    "I bet you like this"
    *Bell rings*
    "Alright class that will be all"

  • @braixenhearts9998
    @braixenhearts9998 7 лет назад +9

    Hugh and Ed are gods

  • @LoogiTheDino
    @LoogiTheDino 7 лет назад +160

    When is the Rejected Exam Questions/Commericals that never made it to air?

    • @Luke-qr7pm
      @Luke-qr7pm 7 лет назад +1

      Luigi2012SM64 ruclips.net/video/yqyY15LoecA/видео.html

    • @Luke-qr7pm
      @Luke-qr7pm 7 лет назад

      Exam questions ^^^^

    • @LoogiTheDino
      @LoogiTheDino 7 лет назад

      Already seen it.

  • @siobhanjewelljones61
    @siobhanjewelljones61 4 года назад +1

    "I want to see you shit in a bin"😭 can't cope

  • @Lord_Skeptic
    @Lord_Skeptic Год назад +2

    3:33 that is what Mr. Darcy is really thinking

  • @lydiaparker6855
    @lydiaparker6855 5 лет назад +5

    watching this with my Alexa in the room and when he said it she chimes up

  • @sheyannbertschinger
    @sheyannbertschinger 6 лет назад +1

    "I want to see you shit in this bin."
    New favorite pickup line.

  • @eamonahern7495
    @eamonahern7495 5 лет назад +1

    "Shit! Did I say that last bit out loud?" 😂🤣😂🤣

  • @chilliard120
    @chilliard120 6 лет назад +2

    Hal and Ed Gamble may have gotten in some good licks, but "I want to see you shit in this bin" is the funniest thing to have come out of anyone's mouth on this show

  • @KTGetc
    @KTGetc 5 лет назад +6

    There are times when you can tell Ed only said something to get Dara laughing

  • @ReggieKSanshire
    @ReggieKSanshire 2 года назад +1

    "Every inch could be felt as it went in. Her eyes begin to water, as there is a drive into deep left field by Castellanos, it'll be a home run. And so, that'll make it a 4-0 ballgame."

  • @Lord_Skeptic
    @Lord_Skeptic 6 лет назад +4

    0:41 that is what Mrs. Bennett is really thinking

  • @Rascal2006
    @Rascal2006 7 лет назад +55

    Very funny as always 😂😂😂😂

  • @johnrie18
    @johnrie18 2 месяца назад +1

    "Turn the light off," she said.
    "What about all the boats?" Said the Lighthouse keeper.

  • @AR-ii3ly
    @AR-ii3ly 6 лет назад +3

    Brilliant. One of the best I’ve seen.

  • @philippine2240
    @philippine2240 5 лет назад +3

    Now I just want to write a romantic novel with every single one of these lines
    There it is
    Perfection

  • @MarkAtkin
    @MarkAtkin 6 лет назад +34

    Its refreshing to see more than one female for a change.

  • @MaxHACKZ
    @MaxHACKZ 6 лет назад +6

    R.I.P Barry Chuckle

  • @elijahmwanga126
    @elijahmwanga126 6 лет назад +4

    2:07 RIP BARRY CHUCKLE

  • @animelytical8354
    @animelytical8354 6 лет назад +2

    "To me, to you" is too much ah I'm in pain

  • @jakethesnake95
    @jakethesnake95 5 лет назад +1

    The Alexa joke at 1:52 was glorious.

  • @Supposedlyimrightwingnow
    @Supposedlyimrightwingnow 6 лет назад +2

    loved the chuckle brothers gag!

  • @gezzarandom
    @gezzarandom 5 лет назад +2

    My entry, "Van Hesling left the Cullen household, knowing his life work was now complete."

    • @pandakatiefominz
      @pandakatiefominz 5 лет назад

      How clever, a Twilight is bad joke *years* after it was popular

  • @zgblanche1815
    @zgblanche1815 5 лет назад +1

    THE MR DARCY ONE GOT ME

  • @WaffleSnow_
    @WaffleSnow_ 4 года назад +2

    And this is the end of 50 shades of grey. Even so Jane still couldn’t decide what colour to paint the wall.
    Removing her clothes, she turned her back and said ‘does that look right to you?’
    She always believed in love at first sight... until see woke up and seen Dara at the end of her bed
    That’s some of mine

  • @sophie2946
    @sophie2946 7 лет назад +1

    2:45 was the best part!

  • @chengwang411
    @chengwang411 5 лет назад +5

    Brilliant. In a new light. Daylight and it’s disgusting

  • @flightlesslord2688
    @flightlesslord2688 5 лет назад +5

    2:44 ...... The build up

  • @iball310369
    @iball310369 5 лет назад +5

    It was the moment he had been waiting for, for what had seemed a lifetime. He slowly leaned in. Their lips met.
    THEN SHE CLOSED HER LEGS AND CRUSHED HIS SUNGLASSES!

  • @jonathanlabelle6725
    @jonathanlabelle6725 3 года назад +1

    2:10 was expecting a Mario Bros Joke

  • @Blyndir
    @Blyndir 6 лет назад +1

    2:45 Actually, I think this one can be found somewhere in the "50 Shades of Grey" series.

  • @artycassy
    @artycassy 4 года назад +1

    2:02 my Alexa actually responded haha

  • @sauce242
    @sauce242 7 лет назад +1

    I love watching this with the Seinfeld Theme in the Background

  • @alex-fs9yt
    @alex-fs9yt 4 года назад +1

    Ah yes, because we all dream of someone who wants to see us shit in a bin😂😂😂

  • @luckyjim37
    @luckyjim37 3 года назад +1

    Someone make a romantic novel using these jokes

  • @sjg2
    @sjg2 4 года назад +1

    0:51 Everything was in place. The bubble bath has been poured, the chocolate was there, the scented candles had been lit. This was going to be the best wank ever.

  • @blarg.officialproductions8717
    @blarg.officialproductions8717 5 лет назад +2

    Thing is, now I want to write a romantic novel including all of the lines that they said, just to prove them wrong.

  • @untidyecho9916
    @untidyecho9916 6 лет назад +4

    rip paul chuckle

  • @510ney4
    @510ney4 6 лет назад +2

    He put the chocolates, down beside her...Silence.....and then at last she spoke , " Unexpected Item In The Baggage area "

  • @Lord_Skeptic
    @Lord_Skeptic 7 лет назад +6

    something twice the size of the royal barge has just hoved into view between the sheets.
    Blackadder.

  • @jeanmichellelaurent
    @jeanmichellelaurent 6 лет назад +4

    Hugh Dennis’ kfc joke was funny

  • @petergreen2552
    @petergreen2552 5 лет назад

    0_46 😂 great punchline.

  • @vdavi12
    @vdavi12 5 лет назад +3

    I feel for the guy who keeps trying to walk up

  • @Batman-sr1ul
    @Batman-sr1ul 5 лет назад +1

    *i hate romantic stuff but if someone made a book with these quotes i don’t think it’d be possible not to read it*

  • @Inconsistent-Dogwash
    @Inconsistent-Dogwash 7 лет назад +9

    my echo dot turned on lol

  • @timebomb4562
    @timebomb4562 4 года назад +1

    Ed sheeran’s take on Galway girl gets a lot of exposure through mock the week