Social Media Is Ruining My Dating Life | Crazy Assumptions & Poor Communication
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- Опубликовано: 30 июн 2024
- Hey freeeeens! 💕 Let's have a heart-to-heart! Dating these days can be such a rollercoaster, but I've noticed something super interesting-dating and social media can be a tricky combo! 😅 I've been in the content creator game for 15 years now, and in the last three years, I've hit a major roadblock when it comes to sharing my social media accounts with someone new. 🤔 How soon do you guys share your socials when you're dating? Has social media ever caused any drama for you while getting to know someone? Let's spill the tea in the comments! 🍵✨
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Meg you are just beautiful. No ma’am. Don’t dim your light! Something to consider: when I was dating I realized that some people will project onto you how THEY would be if they had the access and the name that you do. That is telling. You are amazing, understand your worth, but you are also humble and kind. Most of them would NOT be if they had that position you have. ❤ The right one will understand exactly what you explained instead of simply going by what they assume.
Great point! Thank you so much!!
I LOVE THIS!❤
So, they want you broke, fatherless, and looking impoverished as well? 👀 Why? Never dim your light for someone else to shine.
I guess that would make some feel like "big man on campus!" LOL
Basically.
That’s exactly what they want.
They absolutely do.
Word for word.. bar for bar.
It's not your responsibility to secure someone else's insecurity! That's what a therapist is for! Keep your confidence & the one will accept you and be proud of you and what you do.
Agreed!!!
I feel the same way getting back in the field has been traumatizing and ghetto 😂😂😂😂😂 I’m done with it for now 😭😭😭
Ivy! Love you so much 🥰🥰🥰
It's going to be hard for women who have standards, rules, and boundaries. Harder for the ones that don't.
It's so tough going through the emotions and assumptions of it all! Truth is I'm tieeeeeeeeed! We can't give up though but I'm taking a break because I'm TIEEEEED LOL
War zone 😅
It’s wonderful you have a good relationship with your Dad. Dating is challenging because you have lots of men that are avoidants and have low self esteem and some are not where they need to be financially. Glad u share.
Yeah I'm getting alot of avoidant communication and attachment! You're right because I'm noticing a lot of that.
Keep doing you girl!!! Those guys are grown boys not men. They haven’t done the work to be secure. The real men who are secure will be proud to be with a woman like you. It’s great you’ve worked on your inner self, you look great on the outside too😍😍
Side note: I’m sick and tired of these men making women feel like we are a lot to handle just because we love to look after ourselves and are financially independent.
Thank you so much!!! Its almost like they freeze up and don't know what to do! LOL
Some men's egos are very sensitive. I'm not a full-time content creator but I live a very blessed life and they still feel a type of way Lol.
I can definitely see that. It may just be how some women are able to provide for themselves and that can have some feeling a way lol which is odd but heeeey what can we do lol
I found this out too. 😮 Especially if they didn't have active fathers. Is there a jealousy there- or just me?
@@brandygee9954 is not just you. I think the same thing .Some men really be jealous. 🥴
@@ulovemegz all we can do is keep living our best lives. Just like you said the right one will stick around.
Let's start with...YOU LOOK STUNNING MEG, WHEW 😍 back to the video.
Thank you so much!!!
Nope! They’re just insecure. I don’t care what you look like or have. If a man wants you he don’t give a ish. Having a positive father image scares the losers.
Agreed! I think its the attention thing too
High maintenance is code for can't afford to date you and understand you won't be easily impressed. Also having a good relationship with your father means they can't run game on you because he will spot the b.s. a mile away. Men avoid women with standards and expectations.
No damn lies detected. However, boys do that. Men love a woman with standards.
I think that is a big part because my discernment is so on point now! I have standards I stand by and many don't wish to sustain that.
Sis, please don’t let these men gaslight you. They will find any reason to ghost. Their insecurities have nothing to do with you. There’s literally nothing wrong with you. Be your beautifully blessed self and the right man will love you. Be your authentic self… continue to grow, stay in tuned and fine tune what you want. It’s coming. ❤
These dudes are insecure, broke, cheap, and weak. You deserve better! I make decent money in my career and the more I make, the fewer dates/interest I get. I’m 44 and just about given up on a relationship.
@@tc47440 thank you so much! In recent years they’ve all been super nice and have great lives in their own but it just may be a thing of attention that they don’t want and I understand but it would be nice to know the reason
@@ulovemegzi like how you don't reduce this conversation into a man bashing session.
in time, the man that matches and complents your energy will surely come. you are attractive in many ways, and you come across as non-combative.
The men that were talking to you on Thread are telling you hiw they think and feel. Clearly, they don't have their ish together. The ones that ghost you did you a favor. They made room for he right man to come into your life. Stop looking, and allow yourself to be found. One last thing, a secure man will never be intimidated by your social media and lifestyle. Key word is secure.
Thank you so much! I actually allow myself to be found, and these individuals approach me first, so it's always really interesting how it turns out when my social media is revealed.
I love that you’re being so resilient in this process!!!! I think in this day and age, the girls that can continue to get back up and keep trying and stay open will find someone. Also, I find the most confident men don’t have social media, so maybe start looking for men who don’t fool with it.
I agree! The past relationship I had was great because he didn't have social media and wasn't into it and didn't feel any way about me being on social. It was way less stressful lol
Honey, dating is just trippy these days. I think social media has improved our access, but it has damaged our social skills.
You are glowing sweetheart, the right man will never feel intimidated ❤keep being you sweetheart
It’s never the woman responsibility to find the man . God designed the man to find you. Just be in position with having your priorities in line so the right one will come . Men will come but you want the one sent from God to stay .
So true 💯
This in Jesus name
Even if a man finds you, is it not on you as a woman to say yes or no? Whether woman or man, you still make a choice. You're not meant to stand there passively and just accept somebody because they chose you, you are also meant to choose.
One of the many things I've enjoyed about following you over the years is not only are you talented and have a great personality but you're humble. With that being said, I think you should continue to be upfront. The guys who shy away from you with reasons, like "You're high maintenance" is code for "I can't afford to AND not willing to do what it takes to date you!" Because when you really think about it, it means this guy is going to have to work a bit harder than he normally does to afford to do things for you that you can already do for yourself. He has to put a bit more consideration in the activities, restaurants, trips, and gifts! AND YOU SHOULD NOT EVER feel the need to make someone you're interested in pursuing a relationship with feel as if he doesn't need to do the aforementioned things because you are worth it Megan! I am not a fortune teller so I can't say when it will happen, but you will eventually connect with the guy meant for you so keep your head up so that your crown doesn't fall off! 💪🏽💞👸🏽
Thank you so much! I totally agree! Keeping that crown on straight STRAIGHT!!!! Yesss you better say the word!
This video came out at the right time. I'm a 32 year old woman, never dated yet, but I'm working on myself (fearful avoidant/anxiety) before I start getting comfortable with the dating scene. What I've observed over the past year is a lot of men appear to be confident, but they have some of the biggest insecurities, are not financially/career independant, and have low self-esteem. Instead of working on themselves, they just say women are to blame and have too many standards. They view women who are self-sufficient, highly productive, or independent as masculine/high maintenance or not submissive. A lot of them want to dim your light, knock down your confidence, and put you in a box of how a woman is "suppose" to be. They also expect to provide the bear minimum in a relationship but then turn around and lust for the same ig/only fans models they despise. A lot of those men you mentioned also seem like the type that are overly dominant/masculine, don't want rules/boundaries and know they will get called out for not contributing when it comes to things such as cooking, cleaning, assisting with child care, paying rent/bill, etc so they say we're to high maintenance. Hoping black women will lower their standards and settle in order to boost their fragile egos. I think it's important to look into the qualities of a man and things they say while your dating, as this will determine whether they are the right fit for you. Personally, I need a man who respects women, wants a partnership, is a great personality fit, is God-fearing, financially secure, loves me, patient, understanding and provides acts of service. I believe confident people will naturally attract one another, but it will take quite a bit of time. Whenever god gives you something good, it requires patience, though the wait can be painful. Keep living in your truth, walk in confidence, and always focus on yourself and do the right things in life. You will surely get someone wonderful in your life that will attract you and is secure and confident.
PS, this might be a weird suggestion, but have you looked in dating male content creators or someone in the same industry as you? I feel when you have someone who shares the same interests as you, that could help lessen the blow of hiding who you are. Love your videos as always, please keep em coming! 🥰😍❤️
That was well said, and I experienced many of the things you stated in the past. It's so interesting how a man on paper appears to have all their ducks in a row but lack confidenence, and I've noticed a lot of that through conversation. So far, the men I've been interacting with have been more on the corporate, medical, and entrepreneurial side of things, so there shouldn't be any problems there, but boy, was I wrong. I haven't organically met any content creators but I'm open to exploring that in the future if it happens.
All 👏🏾 of 👏🏾 this 👏🏾! I'm 32 too and childddddd it's so bad out here.
This is a great comment.
On another note, you look great! 😍💕
Thank you so much!!
They can’t afford you that’s it. You’re dodging a lot of narcs as well. They hate women who love & take care of themselves. Your shining light & self confidence intimidates them.
It's more that they want an easier route because they definitely can afford the same things I have and have more than me. I think its the effort they wish to not take part in. For some of these men, their job title is their pull, and when I'm not impressed by that alone... it's like they don't know what to do because I'm somewhat of their equal and I'm used to what they're used to LOL
Be who you are and allow them the space and opportunity to accept it or decide that it’s not for them. Similar to people who don’t want to date someone in law enforcement or the military. It’s all about your choices. You have the choice to be a great content creator and they have the option to say no, that’s not who I want my partner to be. It’s no reflection on you or them. Everyone has requirements and standards. Keep up the good work , be who you are and who you need and want will show up.
I feel like social media podcasts are ruining everyone’s dating lives. If you’re attractive, and you have a certain body type, men automatically assume, ”you’re for the streets”. With your situation, you also have to be careful of men trying to get clout off of your success as well. But my advice is to just stay positive and believe that what’s for you, won’t miss you.
Omg I 1000% agree! I recently commented on a topic regarding Chris brown taking a pictures with his fans. The men in the comment session were ranting about how disrespectful it was and how the girl don't have no respect for their man. I agreed with the one gentlemen (he's seem like the rare confident and secure type) who said it's just a picture and real men are not worried by a pic, especially if it's with a celebrity and she paid to see him. A lot of men said came hard after me and said "I'm for the streets". The funny part they don't know about me is I'm a virgin and never been intimate before, so how could I be for the streets, wtf 🙄 lol. Like if your insecure and not confident with yourself, then just say that! We can have an opinion and agree to disagree, but just be respectful. But of course, I'm not surprised they reacted that way as a lot of them are not stable mentally and are frustrated with their lives lol 😆 😂 🤣
Hire a matchmaker and let them deal with this!
As long as the matchmaker is in a relationship or married.
I’ve literally given up on dating and it’s sad to say because I’m just 27. I’m not a social media girl and honestly I’m more of a homebody. But, ofc I do occasional outings. No one approaches, most times they just look. I’m a tall girl, with a nice figure. Never been told I’m unattractive, yet, no compliments. I just keep to myself because most of these men are only after one thing. I want someone to know me and like me for me. You go on a date with them and they expect you to come to their house. STDs/STIs are so rampant nowadays. I just can’t with the games. I’m leaving it in Gods hands now, while continuing to live my best life
@@kraziikiim I can relate!!! It’s like if you’re not doing “that” in a certain time or seem like too much effort then it’s over and that’s unfortunate.
Have you tried dating content creators? Or would you date a content creator
Not specifically creators but other entrepreneurs yes. I would if the connection was there.
Love this video. You’ll find the right person. Some men a just painfully insecure
It’s insecurity. Period.
Exactly! 💯
Yup 100%
With some I get it’s that but I’m starting to think it’s the attention and not wanting the affiliation 🥴
It is definitely their personal insecurity; and yes, it does weed out who is truly getting to know you, for you and not what you do. How you present yourself is one of the reason why they wanted to "get to know you" but once they get a grip that you are alllll the way put together in every aspect, it intimidates them. I experience this all the time but no longer put in any thought process because my needs are met through me and people I have dated seriously in the past. Trust me God has the right guy for you. Love this video by the way.💕
i use to hide my social media too as a smaller creator & i don’t even have a big following & it bothered some once i disclosed. if it was an issue i just moved on. eventually i stopped hiding it. i eventually met my partner and he’s 100% supportive of what i do & i feel whoever is for you will support you in all that you.
Great video Meg. Ladies, I promise you don’t have to let rid of your “attitude” or personality to get a successful man and be in love!!♥️
Thank you so much!!!! I feel like I'm in the ball park but I got a few strikeouts but I'm ready for a homerunnnnn gworrrrllll lol
I've been following you for years You have grown here into a very beautiful successful intelligent young woman and you've always spoken so highly of your daddy (you know im laughing & why) But seriously he's always giving you sound advice. If these males not men are giving you flags pay attention to the flags. Much success to you and never forget to always be your true authentic self
Thank you do much!!!
Omgggg Meg this is so disheartening. I experience the same in my profession as well. That’s their loss, keep growing and glowing love! ❤️
You don’t age! You are an OG RUclipsr!
You just need a high value man boo. I’ve been told I’m intimidating also when a man sees you’re so pretty and you have all these things for yourself. It’s gonna take an extra alpha male who thrives in his divine masculine energy to be able to take you off the market. I’ve accepted my love story may take a little longer but I’m not lowering my standards or how I am as a person.
I agree with you. The men I've been interacting with have been good candidates "on paper" and are equal or have more going on than I do, but I agree it's going to have to be someone extra EXTRA lol secure.
Boys are definitely intimidated. Men aren't.
I think some people value anonymity more than in the past. When you date a content creator, you open yourself up to criticism from strangers. No matter how much you may try to hide your partner, people are dedicated to finding out lol. That’s just my take on it.
They can't find out if you don't show them. Or, say you're in a relationship.
Yeah, I've hidden a few long-term relationships and kept it 100% offline because I just don't think my relationship should be content, lol. I get a picture now and then, but entire content like couples content isn't my thing.
@@VerleanHurd Yeah they really think I'm going to be posting them day and night and I think that's where the ghosting comes about LOL
@@VerleanHurd then does that lead the other person to feel like they are being kept a secret?
Megz like I always tell myself no matter what someone else think loved your self always almighty God will bless you that l know for sure.
Happy Tuesday 😊
Just be you and the right one will come
NOT MY PROBLEM, NOT MY BUSINESS 😂 YES! I agree, social media has got things so twisted around when it comes to dating and expectations. The concept of starting a relationship or interaction by lying is so backwards. I’m not sure why there’s so much resistance to just communicating their own insecurities or misgivings about your job/confidence/lifestyle aside from the fact that the men need some therapy 😅 Best of luck Megz! Been rocking with you for yearssss and loving every season bc you’re so joyful and genuine and authentic! Of the millions of men on earth all you need is one and I believe one amazing man will show up!!
I also wonder how much your location affects the experiences you’ve had and if it’s worse in California vs anywhere else?
If you having problems I’m doomed
oooh noooo! We gone stay positive lol
Girl. Same.
I say the same 😂 Megz is so gorgeous and struggling, lord I don’t know what will be my position 😂😂😂
@@Zen-cx5tc Chile idk what I’m doing that could be wrong at this point 🥴😂
@@ulovemegz some men hate successful women. But your king is close by trust the process 🙏
I love you. Been watching you for many years. Continue to succeed ❤️
It's always good to see you your VIDEO about hair it been very helpful to me in my hair grow thank you so much I really appreciate it
Omggg yes! I have experienced this! I can't figure out what's the problem. I'm a self sufficient girl working in beauty marketing and have a side business as well as im a streamer. Guys are attracted, go on dates, love bomb me....then, THEY DISAPPEAR!! IDK what the issue is!
I disagree with a lot of the comments that the man is insecure. Social media is a slippery slope. I think it’s more so that ppl do have a negative perception of influencers. Now that influencers have been a thing for a while and lost its appeal I think most of us know/ think social media is fake and disingenuous. I can get why a guy would be skeptical about dating an influencer. Good luck
Same here! Not saying that the perception of these men is correct but to dismiss it completely is crazy to me. The thing is if the shoe was on the other foot - a man dismissing feedback he was getting from tons of women - we would call him crazy. Megz is clearly beautiful and attracting these men so it's not her per se, but the perception these men have in their heads once they find out about her social media, that's the obstacle. So dismissing the perception part is only going to do harm.
You’re right girl, it’s not your problem. A secure man will support you in your career choices. These men out here are a mess.
3:25 I feel the same . I don’t like sharing socials early on. I have family and friends there and that’s an outlet for me. Who I am online isn’t me in real life and guys judge off of that .
Pretty girl… the right one will come thru. Please don’t settle! Subscriber forever….
Girl you will find your person. There are lots of social media women who are married. Just keep doing do. These guys sound broke 😂😂😂
Thank you so much! The crazy thing is they are far from broke which is throwing me way off lol.
@@ulovemegz hmm I dunno them. The dating scene is very weird right now
@@ulovemegzI think you are only intimidating for the wrong person. Like I feel the same way and I am not a content creator. What’s meant to be will be. You honestly can’t stress over it
@@cletang88 I agree!
@@ulovemegzThey figure you make more than them. Even the ones that make decent money. They’re intimidated.
Meghan I am 54 years and I am speaking to you as if I were an "auntie". It's not that these men are intimidated or don't have self esteem. Most men that are making a decent living for themselves definately already HAVE that. I can tell you what I've heard so many men say. They want PEACE in a relationship. I can tell you that although you are not, alot of these influencers ARE high maintenance. Some of them portray that they live these "over exxagerated" lifestyles", and have to buy all these MATERIAL things to APPEAR a certain way and that is a turn-off for most decent men. Plus, being on social media and You tube and making videos can mean possible "exposure of one's life" and that's a noooo for most men that WANT that peace in their home. Let's be real...we all know that social media can be a head-ache for people if they have to deal with it everyday. Especially if it is someone's job. Don't listen to these comments saying "If he can't handle it".... "He has low self esteem"....blah blah blah. I think men don't want to deal with all of the "extras" that may come from dealing with it everyday. And that is understandable. I'll be honest with you. If I was single and if a man I was interested in told me that he is an "Influencer" or makes videos, It would be a little bit of a turn-off to me as well. Only because that's not how I would want to live my life. And it's not because I have low self esteem at all. We all know the different reasons. All they know in the beginning, is that you make videos and are doing social media, so for them...they are like "Oh boy...here we go"... People want - what they want in their life. I'm sorry to say that, but it's true. So, I'm not saying dim your light at all. I'm just saying you will find someone that is willing to accept your job. They just assume it will bring more head-aches to their life, when that's not necessarily true. Just be diligent and don't give up on searching. He's out there and good luck to you.
Thank you so much! I think it all takes the correct person who will “get it” and who will understand who I am and how I operate because we all aren’t on that kind of time, and it just sucks to be clumped into assumptions that ALL influencers are social media centered and never turn it off but hopefully one day I’ll run into someone who understands my purpose and how I operate, but I understand if someone wishes to have someone who doesn’t have a social media presence but it would be nice to have communicated about it if its a concern instead of just ghosting someone you've been speaking to for weeks.
@@ulovemegz Totally agree with you. I think some men just don't want to hurt a person's feelings, so they may think it's better not to say anything at all about it. Most know that it will not change anyway, and who are they to even ask that of someone, even later on in the relationship. Don't want to go down that route... So they may take the easy way out early on, which is bad. But yes, what you said is so true. Blessings to you and you'll find him.💕💕
Thanks for sharing. It's true, people have a problem with people on social media. Could be jealousy and insecurity. Even people in a person's family act funny when they see you doing well on social media. I personally don't tell anyone anymore, just for safety purposes. If I meet other influencers, I share. I've realized that if a person will like me for me, they don't need all that info at first. I take it one day at a time. I'm not giving out my social media info because that literally is all my info too soon. I stay in the Lord and let Him do what He do. 😊 I think you'll be fine. If you "appear high maintenance", you're just "high maintenance" for them. Be yourself and the person God has for you will know how to respond to you and everything you come with in due time and due season.
Hi girl I have been watching you from high school ❤. I'm sorry hun we are suffering with the same problem, they are controlling, them ghost is a blessing 🙌. They wanted a woman with no goals to belittle, they can't do that with you because your work speak for it self. My hair is long in my back because of you girl ❤ I hope your king comes megan .
Aw thank you so much!! Yes it’s so challenging and I’m hope we all have our happily ever after!!!
Aw thank you so much!! Yes it’s so challenging and I’m hope we all have our happily ever after!!!
Men are more complicated than women are, truly. There were so many red flags in those Reddit threads it’s not even funny. They want you to look like an Instagram baddie that has your DMs full in person, but they in fact also want you to have 12 followers with a default photo of your cat.
All the responses you were getting about your “follower count” being the issue is because that’s an issue for them. They don’t know how to act with all those followers. Power is the weakness of many men. It has made them just as quickly as it has ruined him. Our weakness as women is love. All you have to do is love us. It doesn’t matter how powerful we become, we will always come back to your love. They got the game all twisted up.
it just seems the guys you are dating are not on your level. Level up a bit in your search and you will find what you are looking for.
I definitely agree on a communication level because it's not there. On paper they are definitely on my level if were talking levels but even that sounds weird to me LOL because I don't view myself to be on a level LOL but as far as their lifestyle and careers etc we actually are on the same level which is what throughs me off. Communication is lacking for sure!
Yeah social media has created so many assumptions and generalizations that ppl take that as reality. It’s sad that they’ll project and try to make their insecurities your issue. I’m scared to even try dating because ppl always act like having standards is asking for too much when they’re just too insecure to even meet them. This affected my self esteem for a while but now I see a lot of them are just looking for someone to validate them by lowering themselves to their standards
I was having fun in the beginning 5 yrs into dating consistently I’m tired lol
They automatically think that you're an Only Fan😂
The assumptions are so wild! LOL like I just be talking about lipgloss and shoes LOL
@@ulovemegzthey think it’s a cover for your escort business 😂
Yes, some men are stupid. OF isn't always about busting it open. Funny thing is, that's not how OF started out.
If she's wearing a lot of bikinis and scantily clad clothing on her socials then that would be why. But Is she?
@@marlak4203, who me? Say if someone is like that on social media, it could be because they're into fitness, too. A lot of the fitness and trainer girls wear those kinds of things. I don't see anything wrong with it.
I completely agree with everything you said and don't think you're doing anything wrong. In recent years, I wonder if some are worried of becoming "content" which I wouldn't personally want either. I've heard you say they are on your level financially, but would you date someone that is on your level social media wise?
Great points! Yeah, I totally understand if I'm seeing someone and they don't want to be "content," and if that is their issue, I would love to have the opportunity to have a conversation about those relationship boundaries because I'm very private in general and would understand that concern to discuss it.
Im about to listen to this and i hope to hear you date everybody and older❤😊..
I hate when guys ask for my socials now. Why can’t we just talk and text? Why can’t we just go out and get to know each other that way? When I tell guys I don’t have WhatsApp or any of the socials they stop communicating.
I know! I used to get major anxiety like, oh lord, here we go! Things are about to change when I reveal my pages. I was way more successful when it wasn't brought up at all which I find so odd lol
I guess it is just an age thing because men my age NEVER ask for social media. I've never shared my social media with any man that I've met. But I'm much older than you are :)
You’re a business Owner in Marketing or MUA 👏🏽
I've said those in the past. “Oh cool…where can I see your work?” it always reverts back to social 😂
Wooh you're too beautiful and I love your content. Any man would be lucky to have you, how dare they ghost you lol. I think you should keep focusing on yourself and being the beautiful you until someone loves all that comes with you coz that's what you deserve xo
Have u ever considered having a separate and private insta account not that u should scale back who you are because I have a male friends who have these same shared opinions about influencers
I have in the past but it still didn't change much because my other pages are still active and it eventually was always "something"
Its not you, Meg, its them! Keep God first and continue to do you, when the time is right for you to meet the right man, he will come! I would continue to be upfront with what I do, I do not see the point in hiding what you do, because he is going to find out anyway. Just put everything on the table and let it be.
Men trip over the strangest things. It also depends where you’re meeting these guys. Maybe try a change of scenery and new experiences that align with the kind of man you want. I know you didn’t mention this in the video, so you could’ve already tried this but I thought it was worth a suggestion.
Aw thank you! I don't think the issue is where I'm meeting or the kinds of guys because they're all successful themselves but Im starting to think its the attention from social. Like how do people navigate dating and social media.
You don’t age! You are an OG RUclipsr! Wait on the Lord Meg…he will supply the best man for you !❤
I was listening to a succesful woman Donni Wiggins and she has this issue
Make a instagram for family and friends. Your work instagram is for work you dont need to share your work page.
There's a great interview between Breeny Lee and Rebecca Lynn Pope that you may want to check out. She gave her tips on how to date successfully as someone with a big social media following and making more money than most men.
Oooouh I'm going to that check out because I need all the learnings abs help I can get lol
🥰
I like this chit chat Megz.
U look cute too, as always.💎😍
Allow the person the opportunity and privilege to know the real you!
That way they can fall in love with YOU and not a fake version u have presented to them.
How will you know if a person really loves YOU, if u don't allow them to see... YOU‼️
Just b yourself Megz!
My goodness your channel name speaks for itself, "ulovemegz", u are ENTIRELY lovable‼️
I'm really happy your dad is in your life! That's a true gift from the Lord!
Every girl ain't got that responsibile father figure in their life!
You r smart , u gonna be alright! 💕💯
You should be happy that the guys leave you alone if you are not their preference instead of having someone come along only to nag you and bring you down. I would not call it insecurity but a personal preference. We as woman also say we do not want a man who is always out with their boys drinking cause they may be up to no good. That does not make you insecure but clear on what you want. Unfortunately most people will make assumptions and all you can do is make peace with that reality.
The right person will come. A secure person will be first honest with themselves and with you and let you know it will not work. It sucks that they ghost you but some people don’t feel comfortable with telling someone they are not for them which usually is a guy thing. Glad you don’t let it get to you.
Thank youuu! Yeaaah I'm happy that I'm not having drama in that area but I'm not happy if there's a concern and its not communicated with me especially if I've been speaking to someone for weeks and things seemed fine prior.
I pray that God will send you the right man for you ❤
Such a beautiful woman. I live in the netherlands, dated almost all races, different ages etc and came to the conclusion that is not me but the dating culture. If its not the single mothers or the educated or the 9to5 girlies its something else. Men have been lost for centries. They created social systems like religion and the male gaze to oppress women.
If you know that you are almost the perfect woman then its their lost. I got so sad often times because of ghosting but since I decentered men from my life i dont take it personally. And I stoppend dating or entertain situtionships in general. I deserve mental and emotional safety and the modern men is not able to give me that so I give it to myself. With a lot of men you cant be a good honest woman. There ego is always in they way and they themselves battle with it.
But i also think that a lot of people made social media influencers look bad. Its a warzone at this point
Hey beautiful, Queen 👸🏽! How you move is up to you. I'm a content creator, but I was married prior to starting that. My husband enjoys watching my vids and is supportive. However, I have almost no followers 😂! But, he would still be fine, because he encourages me to create.
Option 1: Be honest about your work, but stop sharing your socials. It's NOT a lie, it's keeping your business and personal separate. You can share it later when you see the man is actually invested in you, the relationship, etc.
Option 2: Share everything as you are doing, and let the chips fall where they may. Men ALWAYS make assumptions about women with EVERYTHING. They judge women quickly and harshly. I wish women did them the same way. Just express that your content is about hair!!! Also, maybe date different kinds of men, Meg. I think you know what I mean by that... There are men of different kinds who could happily afford your maintenance and not bat an eye (even though you aren'trequesting that). I said what I said, and you're a smart enough girlie to understand me.
What would I do? Option 1: and he wouldn't get access until we were engaged 😂. I have to keep it real. When a man is in love, not like, he will accept way more! Hugs to you 🤗!!!
It is wonderful to hear that he is supportive and watches! That's super sweet. I think option 1 is a great option because the assumptions without communication is killing the process lol.
Everyone has preconceived notions how about someone else depending on their looks or where they're from or what they do for a living. I don't want to sound like a Hallmark card but if a man is not jumping over joy to be with you girl after everything you've accomplished and how beautiful you are. Clearly you are dating beneath you and maybe you need to set your sights on a higher level of men.
Thank you so much! These men "on paper" are absolutely GREAT candidates if we were talking about careers and finances, but there's much more that would be needed to have a successful relationship. Social media seems to be where the line stops, which is unfortunate. These successful men seem not to want the attention I have on social.
First, you look amazing!♥️ Remember quantity over quality. You will absolutely meet your match/person. You are bubbly, beautiful and talented. I’m wondering, do you think you’ve been dating on your level ? I only ask because generally the type of men who get intimidated by a woman are usually the ones who aren’t winning in their own lane. I’ve had great experiences with the men who are successful and confident in who they are. My fiancé is a commercial real estate broker and he’s been the most supportive person ever! Never intimidated and brags about me. I also think there’s a stigma that comes with being an influencer which is unfortunate bc people shouldn’t make assumptions.
Hey, thank you so much! I've been dating UP UP UP! Doctors, executives, coaches, etc., so if we were speaking of levels, they are WELL ABOVE and beyond as far as lifestyle and financial security, etc, but as soon as I share my socials when asked, it COMPLETELY changes!
@@ulovemegzugh that’s frustrating! And Good👏🏾👏🏾 Okay I’m glad to hear that🥰 I think you hit the nail on the head in the video. A lot of men aren’t actually secure in themselves. Theyre not honest about the fact that the relationship dynamic that makes them feel the most confident is one where the women is beneath them and insecure. I’ve met plenty of men in the past who loved to shout about how they love a confident woman but really couldn’t handle it. Like you said, you’re weaving the ones who aren’t meant for you early on
@youlovemegz I think this notion that men are insecure or have big egos is coming from Women who may not want to face the real truth about why they are not getting selected by the men they want. First of all, men in general don’t like drama women do. You couple that with social media and most successful, traditional men are running. So on the contrary, it’s not the insecure, ego driven men that don’t want to be bothered with social media it’s the very secure men who knows what he wants and he doesn’t want that! It’s easy to just say, all the men have egos and insecure. Really, all of them, or is it the ones you pick. And I don’t mean you in particularly but just making a point. Feminine, traditional, submissive, women your age are married by now because most made it a priority when they were young.
If we want to talk about from a biblical perspective, the woman was made for the man not the other way around. The culture has messed everyone up when it comes to marriage and family because it’s anti Christ and against God.
I know you’re not going to like this but if you’re really ready for marriage, you’re going to have to be clear about what it is you want in a man and do the men you want, want a woman like you. Social media guru, hair makeup, ect. Men have opinions and the older they get the more options they have. It’s not that way with women. We live in a culture where women think men are attractive by their success and most time only the worst men are. But traditional men who are rooted in God wants to take care of you and will . But this culture makes that an ugly thing. So here’s the big question. It’s not what you have so much but what are you willing to give up! And yes, time is ticking. Ive been watching you for a long time now and I’m so proud of you. You’re like my daughter in my head lol. Much Love. We can talk more if you’d like. I’m not hard to find. I’m praying for you.
Well said! Thank you for sharing. I definitely think some of the challenges Im having is based on how I was raised and relationships / marriage wasn’t talked about as a priority growing up. It was all about school and creating a life for “yourself” and not with a partner. So you grow up and enter relationships not having a clue and have to learn things later on which I did and grateful for the many lessons I’ve learned. The recent interactions I’ve had were always great and being told I’m wife material by every guy who are also successful themselves but communication changes when my social media is shared so I’m not sure what it could be other than someone not wanting the affiliated attention which I understand but it’s a bit frustrating also to not have it communicated. When you mention what am I willing to give up? What exactly would that be in this situation? Give up my social media presence?
@neicybaby I am 54 years old, and you told her (out of love) what she needed to hear. I agree with you and like you,, I hope she finds him because he is out there. Thank you for being truthful and responding out of love.
@@ulovemegz No disrespect, but I dont agree with her. Women are not made "just for the man". I think these sucessful men who have these egos want women they can have some leverage over. That is why when they see her success, and they're almost a bit disapointed because they dont really have a carrot to dangle over her head. Honestly there are men that will truely love and adore her, its just takes some time finding that person. If she loves what she does I dont believe in giving that up just for a man. The right man will be supportive of any career/hobby she does.
@@brittanymilgan yeah I agree and that's been my experience! They dangle so many things in my face and I'm not anywhere near a gold digger and I'm not impressed by things they have bc superficial things aren't important to me. I don't want to give up what I love and work hard for. This and you guys are my happy place 🥹🫶🏾
Some men don’t see content creators and influencers as a real job. I think that’s one of the reasons.
With the kind of men I was interacting with it didn’t seem to be an issue where I needed a “real job”
I say this; A man who has owned several businesses, or was an active lawyer for over 15 years would be quick to make that known and care less about insecurities pertaining to the women who’d be interested in trying to peruse him. He might even make that known off the bat that he is “sought after”.
So why the double standard? You worked hard for your caliber of following and the perks that come with it, so where is this “insecurity” talk even coming from with men?!
I am not a content creator, but have dealt with similar instances and I have decided to take a break from dating and pour more into me. Everyone I have spoken to has recommended dating older; because they’re not obsessed with social media followings, and have already had their fair share of relationships/ experiences so they’re not as sensitive to what other men are doing, etc.
And while I am sure that has its own issues. I don’t think there is any ideal way for us women to even date anymore. Sometimes I feel like everything is either an issue, or an insecurity to some people’s fragile masculinity.
You know what! When you put it that way, you're absolutely right. Whenever I go out on dates with these kinds of men, they give me their entire career history story from start to finish, including all their investments, their money, everything they own, who they know, and the vacations they're going on. But I can't discuss myself? LOL. I never brag or pop my collar in that kind of way, but it's definitely a double standard.
@@ulovemegz
Exactly! And THE MOMENT, you hold them to the “status” and money they claim to have, or even brag on yourself, it’s considered “Gold digging” or “you’re too high maintenance.” It is so sickening!
I agree with your current approach; just let it happen when you feel ready to do so. And only tell what you feel comfortable sharing, these men are going to find anything to make an issue of, so just enjoy the experience for what it is and be ready to leave when it no longer serves you.
Can you give up social media for a financially secure and solid relationship?
If I had a situation where I didn’t have provide for myself fully and this can remain my hobby for fun I’d take that situation.
Hello, I just wanted to say that I don’t feel that you should share your job with people you date and the reason I say that is not like you get to go and find out everything about them on their job. I would just simply tell them this is what I do and I’d rather not share it because it’s my job and, basically that’s that because like I said, it’s not fair that content creators have to share all of that information when others who have a regular job you don’t get to go on their job and look at all the people they know and what they do on a daily basis, so I wouldn’tat all.
So what did these guys say is the resolution? This isn’t your fault.. these guys are very much projecting
The resolution was to not share my social media and to not share that I’m a content creator.
Thats sooo weird to me. When I think of the Jackie’s and Jessie Woo’s… their men don’t give no dams.
These other men must be the insecure type cause girl you got it all goin for you.
Right I know it’s possible for sure but its tough because everyone doesn’t want the attention I assume.
Could be that jackie and Jessie Woo's men are not american men, either...🤔?
I didn’t know it was that many insecure men in this world.
Have u ever thought about a match maker… ur matches will know ahead of time about what you do. 🤷🏾♀️
I’ve had family members try to match make me and when they experienced the same ghosting 😂😂😂😂when they shared my IG 🥴😂
It’s not you it’s them, they’re hiding and you’re popular and they don’t want to get serious then end up on a story and get found out. Hiding from what?? We’ll never know.
I've came to that conclusion a few times that they had girlfriends and I would blow up the spot too much with attention. 😂
All the level comments are crazy 😂 but I can see how it’s intimidating. I’m assuming all these people jumping straight to levels is one of the reasons. Social media is toxic and a lot of people online are arrogant and narcissistic. Not all of course especially the OG’S for some reason yall come across more humble. Yall gotta consider stuff like bigo, live culture and entitlement of some of these influencers. Not to mention what goes on behind closed doors. Either way you’re a great woman and u will find someone. Personality shines boo. ❤❤ I’m sure a lot of average woman would be intimidated to date a male influencer especially with the manoshpere culture lol I could go all day. I really think it’s the toxic culture the ballon popping etc it causes some to shy away from the community in its entirety. Sadly women know your great bubbly personality is what got you here because we are your demographic. Men don’t know what kind of influencer u are and have always been. Just an opinion. I wish the OG’s would be exempt from the assumptions of character based on these new age influencers. Plus peep how it went straight to levels when that was never the issue mentioned in the video. It’s social media as a whole.
I agree! Well saaaaaaiddddt! The new girlies are on something completely different than what we're on, and it's messed up to be clumped into judgment. Right its not about levels at all LOL
@@ulovemegz social media affects us non influencers too believe it or not dating used to be fun now it’s exhausting lol i am tired of the 50/50 high value conversations. Some of us looking for the person who gone be sitting on the porch with us till our last days. Someone we we can’t lose with cause we won getting them im over social media i love me some youtube tho back to the roots for me 🫶
@Icebergchubby I agree with what you said. Completely.
Megs, Im hesitant to give u advice bcus u didn't listen to the other ppl advising you on thread. Everyone here will agree with you because you dont seem to be open to a differing opinion.
There's nothing wrong with sharing what u do, but we dont send ppl we're dating to our LinkedIn page to see our work accolades, do we? No! It's kind of the same as your follower page. Maybe if you had a personal IG that shows more of who you are as a person, since that's why he's probably asking. Yes, influencing is a part of who u are, but they want to know you as a person, not a brand. But i really just think u want us to agree with you. There is so much more to unpack here, but i digress.
@@Quianawilson8 heeey thank you! Naw I don't want y'all to agree or validate me at all but I am open to different perspectives and learning how others deal with this 🤗 Its just a conversation
Before I started the video I thought you should just not share your business Instagram. And now that I heard your thoughts about it I still feel you should not share your business Instagram. You should have a personal Instagram because you’re not your business. If you had a regular job you would not bring your partner to work so they can see everything you do so why share IG/RUclips? Of course you can tell them you are a content creator and you have a big following but they don’t need to see it. You can share it later when you decide not when they ask you.
Those are my exact thoughts too but I used to get so much push back when I did that so I need to think on the best way to go about it again.
@@ulovemegz if you get push back just say you rather get to know each other beyond what you two do for a career or take a note from erykah badu and say i'm an artist and i'm sensitive about my sh*t. lol
Your most likely too good for them anyway as most men like women who need them damsels in distress. Just play the game love. Tootles! ✌️
My Dad said that! He said when you're "too good" and have things together, it requires more TIME (if you know what I mean) and effort for them to "get you" and they're not on that type of time or what to sustain that effort.
Well this video ain't gonna help 😂😂
Oh well! 🥴😂
You don't give your address to people you meet because you aren't doing anything wrong. I would say I work for google and keep it at that.
So when they ask "hey you have Instagram?" What would you say?
I would say no or I don’t share but im 10-15 years older and very private. Your ig is all things hair and beauty so I don’t understand why they would need it.
I’m glad they are ghosting you instead of clout chasing tho
@@Amberuzor@Amberuzor Yeah, that's the part I'm grateful for too!
Expand the net. Date outside your race and try something new.
@@conniechoward I actually do 😉
This is so sad! Maybe the men are ghosting you because they aren't as ambitious or as successful as you. #jealous
They actually are successful which is what I don't understand 🥴😂
Do you only date black men?
Nope 😂
@@ulovemegz Well!!! Its gonna happen for you meg. So, glad you know your worth.
You should be dating oil heirs or something lol.
@@Alainesteph yeah that would be the top of the top 🥴😂
Meg, I don’t think it is about your social media. I believe that a man is a man and wants to lead. Focus more on getting to know him and focus attention on him and you will meet your match in no time. Don’t reinvent the wheel just do what women have done for centuries. 3:45
thank you so much! Everything tends to be absolutely great and they naturally lead, but as soon as social is brought up and shared! GONE LOL