Crusader Kings 2: Castration Challenge Can a Eunuch Make a Dynasty?

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  • Опубликовано: 2 дек 2024

Комментарии • 493

  • @AlzaboHD
    @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +147

    Check out the amazing pokemon sitar cover in the video by Typical Musician here: ruclips.net/video/g007x-qi1w4/видео.html

    • @freealter
      @freealter 5 лет назад +1

      AlzaboHD Be a buddhist a teach the world your peaceful ways by force

    • @MrWeedWacky
      @MrWeedWacky 5 лет назад +1

      this game is basically "what if we..." "sure!"
      and so they did...
      My favorite game is starting in Northern Spain, converting to Germanic pagan by either getting a doctor or randomly inviting a germanic pagan to court and using him as tutor: and starting to pillage the Mediterranean coastlines...

  • @AndrewFullerton
    @AndrewFullerton 5 лет назад +547

    He died in 1917? The Great War took so much from us all

  • @dominicperez3777
    @dominicperez3777 5 лет назад +1612

    How to Make a Harem:
    Step One: Boil as many dwarfs as possible

    • @EpicRenegade777
      @EpicRenegade777 5 лет назад +20

      that would be a very thick and hairy stew

    • @OmegaTrooper
      @OmegaTrooper 4 года назад +12

      @@EpicRenegade777 Go ask Dong Zhuo what he did with the eunuch tongues

    • @Bothrops_Asper_89
      @Bothrops_Asper_89 4 года назад +8

      I attempted to make a kingdom out of dwarves. Didn't went as great as expected.

    • @someorclad9738
      @someorclad9738 4 года назад +3

      @@OmegaTrooper Ah Dong Zhuo. Charming man. He's the quintessential CK2 tyrant. Ancestors bless him in his based glory.

    • @dannytourigny9403
      @dannytourigny9403 4 года назад +1

      @@EpicRenegade777 'a very thick and hairy stew' Mmmm I never realized that I like men that way!

  • @alexanderblack6619
    @alexanderblack6619 5 лет назад +1565

    this shit is actually hilarious. Keep it up. This is how I try to play CK2 but its just not fun sitting and narrating the stuff by yourself lol

    • @thisistherevolt
      @thisistherevolt 5 лет назад +27

      The only multiplayer I was ever able to successfully play was incredible due to us roleplaying.

    • @viggoelenius4400
      @viggoelenius4400 5 лет назад +3

      thisistherevolt How did that work?

    • @dapperbunch5029
      @dapperbunch5029 2 года назад +3

      You do that to? Thank God I thought I was the only one.

  • @Donderu
    @Donderu 5 лет назад +183

    "Man-made deficiencies"
    >Shows Greek
    I lost my shit

  • @christendombaffler
    @christendombaffler 5 лет назад +931

    "In the year of our lord 1917..."
    Wow, he sure lived a long time.

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +147

      whoopsies

    • @liberatusblair
      @liberatusblair 5 лет назад +48

      Well, after all he's been through, he became immortal.

    • @eaglefighter1295
      @eaglefighter1295 5 лет назад +14

      @@liberatusblair Musta been his new found fertility

    • @Dustin_Bins
      @Dustin_Bins 5 лет назад +16

      From 867 CE to 1917 CE, but he was 72?

    • @ethpling165
      @ethpling165 5 лет назад +22

      Hardbeat Eurobass rumor has it that his “exploits” are the real reason World War I started

  • @aquapuppy9838
    @aquapuppy9838 5 лет назад +357

    I saw. I conquered. I came.

  • @tomasnouza2642
    @tomasnouza2642 5 лет назад +1457

    I was expecting ISP' voice after the ironside intro.

  • @ctblue5316
    @ctblue5316 5 лет назад +649

    I played as this guy before he was one of my favorite characters ever because i stopped being a eunuch was a high priest in the Lucifer's Own and then died a saint.

    • @shaynemc7533
      @shaynemc7533 5 лет назад +1

      CTBlue you can’t stop being a Eunuch...

    • @T25l
      @T25l 5 лет назад +87

      @@shaynemc7533 Everything is possible with power of our lord and savior Lucufer

    • @mailware6090
      @mailware6090 5 лет назад +67

      @@shaynemc7533 Yeah, Dark Healing removes any injuries, including your lack of uh... confidence.

    • @shaynemc7533
      @shaynemc7533 5 лет назад +2

      swixel popilo Yeah I didn’t actually know that. I play more EA4 tbh.
      I still prefer the old gods and warrior lodges. I guess it’s a cool if you are a count of the Byzantines and he tries to wipe you out lol.

    • @luminator911
      @luminator911 4 года назад +3

      @@shaynemc7533 EA4 is my worst nightmare

  • @Domhnall_A_Ghalltachd
    @Domhnall_A_Ghalltachd 5 лет назад +645

    When he named his son Judas and became a homosexual eunuch hunchback I lost it looool!

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +55

      I couldn't help the "Judas priest" pun lol

  • @tomthecat9546
    @tomthecat9546 5 лет назад +428

    I hope you do more of these!

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +35

      I had a blast making it, thanks for watching!

  • @JakeAustriaco
    @JakeAustriaco 5 лет назад +279

    Very funny, well written & edited. 100% entertaining.

  • @AlzaboHD
    @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +161

    Thank you to the community for 30,000 subscribers! This video is the result of the "silly video" poll winner from last month. Want to see similar content? New EU4 content dropping this weekend!

  • @krankarvolund7771
    @krankarvolund7771 5 лет назад +182

    An eunuch that regrow his sword, sire almost 50 children and cinsume human flesh? Even for CK II that's a strange story XD

    • @keith3278
      @keith3278 3 года назад +2

      Look up Quill18's "Count of Paris" episodes 4-6 The ruling timeline of " Count Hunter-bilico" it's GOLD !

  • @Koifish
    @Koifish 5 лет назад +205

    YES! More of this my dude! >:D

    • @xeanderman6688
      @xeanderman6688 4 года назад

      Koifish! Impressed to see you here

    • @someorclad9738
      @someorclad9738 4 года назад

      Oh shit. Did not expect to find you here Koifish. How you doing my dude? Is Bannerlord as awesome as they say. Can't play cause.my lappy is too mid tier

  • @arcade3252
    @arcade3252 4 года назад +33

    This is...
    The most bizarre crusader kings playthrough I've seen so far @_@

  • @88kjk75
    @88kjk75 5 лет назад +56

    "Years were spent in hedonistic homoeroticism" - ahhh this, this is one of those golden lines that make yt worthwhile

  • @dustygrrrl
    @dustygrrrl 5 лет назад +127

    Make a part 2 please! I wanna know what Judas gets up to! maybe he can get his many many siblings into foreign thrones and bring them to the dark side.... the dynasty is just starting!

  • @lukecreed5767
    @lukecreed5767 5 лет назад +17

    I spent the whole video giggling, then finally lost it at the "husband and wife" section. Well done! Both from a narrative and a comedic point of view!

  • @shrimpboom8
    @shrimpboom8 3 года назад +10

    8:05 The incredible contrast between your tone and the content of your speech made this one of the funniest ck2 videos ever.

  • @ninakuup21
    @ninakuup21 5 лет назад +147

    Man this is literally the first video of you that I've watched and had to give it a like at the 2 minute mark, awesome video!

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +12

      Thank you! More silly CK2 videos are in the works, Iblis willing!

  • @PaulEIvory
    @PaulEIvory 5 лет назад +258

    What did I just watch? And how can I get more?

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +65

      sᴉlqᴉ dᴉɥsɹoʍ puɐ uɐʇɐs oʇ ʎɐɹd

    • @shashwatsinha2704
      @shashwatsinha2704 5 лет назад +9

      @@AlzaboHD how did you type upside down?

    • @jonathanlakey5962
      @jonathanlakey5962 5 лет назад +37

      @@shashwatsinha2704 by worshipping satan obviously

    • @christofferthorsson607
      @christofferthorsson607 5 лет назад +36

      @@shashwatsinha2704 the dark side of the force is a pathway to many abilities some considered to be unnatural

  • @b-1battledroid674
    @b-1battledroid674 3 года назад +21

    Duke Wilhelm: He could even make penises come back to life...
    Mu'nis of Galilee: Could I learn this power?
    Duke Wilhelm: not from Allah

  • @pixelcat5159
    @pixelcat5159 5 лет назад +110

    Honestly? Not only was this great from a comedic perspective, but was also great from a narrative perspective as well. I was *invested* in the story ffs, that's really impressive
    If you did an actual series following a dynasty through a game of CK2 with this format, and kept it *relatively* on a serious note (This is CK2, even if you weren't playing for memes, they'd happen anyways), it'd probably end up being one of the most entertaining series on the goddamn platform
    If you wanna see more of what I mean, OfficiallyDevin has mastered making narratives from games on his channel (he even did a CK2 playthrough like this, but following a specific character through his life): I think you could do something like that too!

    • @thejake1453
      @thejake1453 4 года назад +2

      You'd probably alos like Rhadamantplays too if you like narrative based lets plays. His kenshi stuff is good.

  • @Aleph3575
    @Aleph3575 4 года назад +8

    I swear, at the Travel Far and Wide part, when the music kicked in, i was like "Man i expected the pokemon theme song". Seconds later i was like "IT IS THE POKEMON THEME."

  • @umuzealot9044
    @umuzealot9044 5 лет назад +30

    5:19 "The real resurrection of Satan was the friends we made along the way..."

  • @js500y9
    @js500y9 5 лет назад +21

    I almost lost my Ironman game when my dynasty’s sole heir had his dick cutoff for cancer reasons. But thanks to the power of Satan, I had it grown back and the game continued!

  • @aidanflaherty6183
    @aidanflaherty6183 4 года назад +21

    "A miracle emerged! His sword returned to him!" LMFAOOO

  • @asdbuddy4848
    @asdbuddy4848 5 лет назад +80

    Ah yes. This is why the internet was created. When can I expect some more content along these lines, my good sir?

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +12

      Soon! In the next couple of videos I'll whip something up like this, I'm thinking... demonic impregnation

  • @yx7628
    @yx7628 5 лет назад +66

    This is one of the greatest shitposts in CK2 history

  • @Madafaka2343
    @Madafaka2343 5 лет назад +6

    Mate, hands down best video you've ever uploaded. Had me crying in tears...

  • @charlespennyworth3698
    @charlespennyworth3698 5 лет назад +29

    Emir Mu’unis is the hero of a generation.

  • @Mysterios1989
    @Mysterios1989 5 лет назад +12

    It is kind of a strange combination hearing someone falling into satanism while an acustic version of the pokemon theme songs plays in the background xD

  • @aloethereqt
    @aloethereqt 5 лет назад +9

    I always enjoy CK2 videos, especially story telling kind of ones, I want more

  • @wtffy
    @wtffy 5 лет назад +14

    I feel like you should get a bloodline if you get the Eunuch trait at any point and have a child after, even if you've lost the trait by that point.

  • @Utardiaresident
    @Utardiaresident 5 лет назад +3

    I would give this a million more likes! Your even tone throughout all the debauchery had me literally crying with laughter. Thank you for this gem!

  • @runelessruneless9024
    @runelessruneless9024 3 года назад +1

    The sheer number of jokes you managed to sell in that dry tone merit you as a genius, sir

  • @SpanishDio
    @SpanishDio 5 лет назад +54

    May god have mercy on your soul

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +13

      Ok but can god cure castration?

    • @OmegaGamer707
      @OmegaGamer707 3 года назад +1

      @@AlzaboHD apparently that’s satan’s job if you try 3 times

  • @picklesthewise
    @picklesthewise 4 года назад +2

    This is such good storytelling. I would watch a full series of this.

  • @AAAntiochus
    @AAAntiochus 5 лет назад +4

    Perfect storytelling for ck2. our Kindgom needs MOAR of that stuff!

  • @iapetusmccool
    @iapetusmccool 5 лет назад +25

    After all that, "the ill-ruler" seems a disappointingly tame and unspecific nickname.

  • @LittleMushroomGuy
    @LittleMushroomGuy 5 лет назад +37

    Convert to Catharism, become a perfectii and adobt a son. YOU WIN

    • @theapexsurvivor9538
      @theapexsurvivor9538 4 года назад +2

      But it is not his blood, thus it is for naught in the eyes of the Duke.

  • @rasmjsneherse1145
    @rasmjsneherse1145 5 лет назад +135

    Just thought I was watching an Isorrows video lol

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +22

      To be fair this video's content is more Isorrow-like than pretty much any of the other ones haha

    • @fin5317
      @fin5317 5 лет назад +3

      @@AlzaboHD just missing a bit of edgy humor, a small edgy laugh and a joke about being depresssed

  • @shadowyshadow6498
    @shadowyshadow6498 5 лет назад +2

    Best video you've uploaded so far on the channel IMO, keep up the good work my man!

  • @KaiserVonFeuer
    @KaiserVonFeuer 5 лет назад +5

    This is just....... beautiful, I think I’m crying from happiness. This is a piece of art, it should be on the world stage! Thanks for the great laugh

  • @Bedinsis
    @Bedinsis 5 лет назад +5

    It makes sense that he'd become a devout worshiper of Shaitan. I mean doing so made his member grow back, a literal miracle.

  • @AnomalyINC
    @AnomalyINC 2 года назад +2

    "Castration Challenge" sounds like a great hashtag for Twitter.

  • @biggybrolunch3809
    @biggybrolunch3809 3 года назад +3

    Finally, after years of dark ritual, I have done it. I have... made a friend!!

  • @TK-rs9lq
    @TK-rs9lq 4 года назад +2

    I wasn't expecting to be pulled into a story like this. Bravo.

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  4 года назад +1

      Thanks for watching! I'll make more CK2 challenge videos soon so stay tuned

  • @ENTProductions
    @ENTProductions 5 лет назад +7

    Valefisk: *fails incest only*
    Alzabo: *WiNs eUniCH OnLy cHaLLeNGe*

  • @shitlordfm3345
    @shitlordfm3345 Год назад

    this is so funny lmao!! i cannot figure out how to play this game but love hearing playthroughs like this narrated in real time, love this

  • @Mark-xq7lh
    @Mark-xq7lh 5 лет назад +3

    The Pokémon music in the background makes this just
    👌

  • @grahamgawd1615
    @grahamgawd1615 5 лет назад +8

    This isn't an narrative, no....This is art.

  • @Tuppie_
    @Tuppie_ 5 лет назад +11

    Today, a classic was born.

  • @publicanimal
    @publicanimal 5 лет назад +12

    13:53 "In the year of our lord, 1917"... uhh, that was 917, my friend.

  • @mirjanbouma
    @mirjanbouma 4 года назад +1

    *searches for odd CK2 videos*
    *Finds this one*
    *Watches the whole depraved thing*
    Well then, looks like I found a new channel to subscribe to!

  • @ThejollyFrenchman
    @ThejollyFrenchman 5 лет назад +10

    What makes this funny is how deadpan the narration is.

  • @CallMeRito
    @CallMeRito 4 года назад +6

    6:18 Brought to you be the Sith Gang.

  • @KitsuneMp9
    @KitsuneMp9 5 лет назад +8

    Dropping a like just for thinking the same thing as me when he had to travel the lands. Great work!

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +2

      SEARCHING FAR AND WIDE

  • @andrewmaximus1247
    @andrewmaximus1247 5 лет назад +13

    I had a fun playthrough with that character, though mine was a god of war. His descendants ended up becoming Jewish and creating the kingdom of Israel

  • @FlyingOktober
    @FlyingOktober 5 лет назад +1

    please do more of this, it was very entertaining and engaging

  • @mysticdueler8979
    @mysticdueler8979 5 лет назад +2

    Top notch stuff. I was laughing all the way through

  • @Rob_Thorsman
    @Rob_Thorsman 2 года назад +1

    He ruled a single county, but was nevertheless the greatest conqueror the world has ever known.

  • @georgewaddy
    @georgewaddy 5 лет назад +4

    Wow my drink just went everywhere after you said pumping and dumping. Haha

  • @rateeightx
    @rateeightx 5 лет назад +4

    13:53 Wait, 1917? Those Must've Been Some Long Years He Had His Court Isolated, If 1000 Years Passed And Nobody Noticed.

  • @DetectiveNyx
    @DetectiveNyx 5 лет назад +4

    "Emir Mu'nis was having so much sex that he fell into a deep depression"
    comments section can't relate
    at least to that first part
    i'm comments section

  • @noahjohnson935
    @noahjohnson935 5 лет назад +6

    I wish to see the epic of this dynasty continue.
    Maybe you can put one of his descendants on the throne of China?

  • @jacobpilon1800
    @jacobpilon1800 5 лет назад

    Thoroughly enjoyed this Alzabo! Would love to see more!

  • @thisistherevolt
    @thisistherevolt 5 лет назад +2

    I haven't groaned like this in a long time. Bravo.

  • @Phillip_of_Burns
    @Phillip_of_Burns 5 лет назад

    I rarely play CK2, but man, it can make some hilarious stories. Keep these coming!

  • @karimm.elsayad9539
    @karimm.elsayad9539 5 лет назад +24

    Munir? more like Mudhlim.
    Munir is "bright" in Arabic and Mudhlim is "Dark".

    • @tibbygaycat
      @tibbygaycat 5 лет назад +3

      This is absolutely perfect. I LOVE it.

  • @Casavo
    @Casavo 5 лет назад +1

    Great stuff man , keep it up!

  • @ACE1918
    @ACE1918 5 лет назад +1

    You just got yourself another subscriber, that was hilarious.

  • @guillaumekaas6505
    @guillaumekaas6505 5 лет назад +11

    CK2 is such a meme that Satan is the answer to everything.

  • @alexiosviapokios3057
    @alexiosviapokios3057 5 лет назад +7

    saw the ironside logo, thought I was watching isorrowproductions

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +1

      Wait this isnt isorrowproductions?

  • @William.Kelly7
    @William.Kelly7 3 года назад +1

    Love the pokemon theme song in the background!

  • @dominicperez3777
    @dominicperez3777 5 лет назад +1

    He became gay then became ungay, then became a cannibal, then died from depression. If that isn't the biggest plot twist of all time I don't know what the fuck is *WHEEZES*

  • @AvGames6
    @AvGames6 4 года назад +3

    This is the greatest story of all time

  • @harryeast95
    @harryeast95 4 года назад +6

    The daughter who ran away and was never seen again appearing on the family tree. There was an opportunity for a joke there I think.
    Which is probably the only one you didn't make. Hilarious video. Well worth the watch.

  • @murplesman
    @murplesman 5 лет назад +3

    I'd love more silly videos like this in the future.

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +1

      One is dropping this weekend, thanks for the feedback!

  • @rileygoodrich305
    @rileygoodrich305 3 года назад +1

    First step. Join the cultist, second step dark healing.

  • @Lonesighe
    @Lonesighe 4 года назад +3

    I laugh so hard, thank you, c'était hilarant !

  • @byronfickett
    @byronfickett 5 лет назад +7

    "natural medieval enhancement"

  • @schekelkraft7034
    @schekelkraft7034 3 года назад +1

    1:21 “man made deficiency”, zooms in on greek

  • @johntesey
    @johntesey 5 лет назад

    It's about family, and that's what's so powerful about it.

  • @DutchBane
    @DutchBane 3 года назад +3

    Second song is medieval gotta catch em all😆😆 awesome!!

  • @LilCommander
    @LilCommander 4 года назад +1

    This video right here is why I started playing CK2

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  4 года назад

      That's awesome to hear - have fun in CK2!

  • @Kaiserhawk
    @Kaiserhawk 5 лет назад +1

    First time watching your channel, and I loved this.

  • @johnnygreenface
    @johnnygreenface 5 лет назад +5

    Castrated man gets measles. At least he is pretty safe

  • @mentalmarquee
    @mentalmarquee 5 лет назад +4

    what a wonderful bedtime story

  • @AugustTheStag
    @AugustTheStag 5 лет назад +15

    *"Galililililililee"*

    • @AugustTheStag
      @AugustTheStag 5 лет назад +2

      And don't forget about *"Papple"*

  • @PrimisSanguis
    @PrimisSanguis 4 года назад

    Dude what the hell your videos are amazing!

  • @michaelpothoven1041
    @michaelpothoven1041 5 лет назад

    Did not expect to make an appearance here.
    A surprise to be sure. Whether a welcome one is yet to be seen.

  • @reidy1012
    @reidy1012 5 лет назад +2

    I would just like to add. Thank you, this made my afternoon trying not to crack up in laughter. 😂😂😂😂

  • @yesno9593
    @yesno9593 5 лет назад +3

    This video was quite the experience

  • @raresmincan634
    @raresmincan634 4 года назад

    Actually,our great and glorious emir was the commander of abbasid armies,and literal caliphmaker of the abbasid caliphate
    Impressive

  • @norwalk2630
    @norwalk2630 5 лет назад +1

    Best ck2 video of all time

  • @TaeSunWoo
    @TaeSunWoo Год назад +1

    Not even 5 mins in and you already joined an evil court (facepalm) 😂

  • @harlan7012
    @harlan7012 5 лет назад +2

    Oh yes please do make more. This was an amazing story to listen to before bed😏.

  • @SpencerLemay
    @SpencerLemay 5 лет назад +1

    0:27 "Galil-lilly"
    Dude have you never been to church? ga·luh·lee

    • @AlzaboHD
      @AlzaboHD  5 лет назад +1

      Never been to church but I've just been to pronunciation school, thanks Spencer!

    • @SpencerLemay
      @SpencerLemay 5 лет назад +1

      @@AlzaboHD Well that explains why you spend your free time playing Swedish Medieval satanic orgy kingdom simulations.