Top 100 - Things Not to Say to a Cop

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  • Опубликовано: 20 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 3,5 тыс.

  • @mrphelpsco
    @mrphelpsco 10 лет назад +1998

    #77 lol - "I thought about becoming a cop.....then I graduated from high school."

  • @classicrockguy7
    @classicrockguy7 8 лет назад +1244

    "No officer, it's Hi how are you,"

  • @Matthew_Calmert
    @Matthew_Calmert 8 лет назад +790

    "I bet I could grab that gun before you finish writing that ticket"
    Yeah, that's the worst one xD

    • @joshholmes4731
      @joshholmes4731 5 лет назад +17

      Nope, #16 is the worst by far

    • @reidmartin9103
      @reidmartin9103 5 лет назад +2

      Joshua Holmes definitely

    • @user-xy9lv6kk2j
      @user-xy9lv6kk2j 5 лет назад +1

      73 is easily the worst one.

    • @mattd3978
      @mattd3978 5 лет назад +1

      All of em quick ways to get shot

    • @THE410KiNG
      @THE410KiNG 5 лет назад +2

      Matthew Calmert no the worse one is someone stole all my weed I’m so glad you guys are here now lMBO that had me dead

  • @Tammy_Tammy123
    @Tammy_Tammy123 10 лет назад +743

    Lmao I loved the "no officer it's hi how are you"

    • @josiahcolburt9323
      @josiahcolburt9323 5 лет назад +4

      I listened to the video say it while i was reading lol

  • @2BChaos
    @2BChaos 5 лет назад +335

    I wasn't speeding officer, but I passed a couple of guys who were!

  • @ivymeadows1944
    @ivymeadows1944 10 лет назад +505

    Top 4
    "I swear to high officer, I'm not God."
    "Is this the same test you have to take to become a police officer?"
    "You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
    "No, officer. It's 'hi, how are you?'"

    • @david-oh9bi
      @david-oh9bi 5 лет назад

      Ivy Meadows no one of the best is “WHAT THE HECK DO YOU WANT?”

  • @chrisy123567810
    @chrisy123567810 9 лет назад +634

    "Oh.. What's... What's this down here... It's..."
    *PEW PEW PEE*
    "Nah I'm joking haha"

    • @lucickapiten5868
      @lucickapiten5868 7 лет назад +1

      Nikola Vucevic svi te mrze

    • @jomardbenemile3464
      @jomardbenemile3464 5 лет назад +1

      Nikola Vucevic the magic suck

    • @doobie716
      @doobie716 5 лет назад +3

      Bro u wont even get to finish the joke by the time u say what's this they gon shoot u

    • @BarabaZgojena
      @BarabaZgojena 5 лет назад +1

      what's it like to be on a perpetually irrelevant team?

    • @JonathanRod
      @JonathanRod 5 лет назад

      @@BarabaZgojena Ok, Zgojena

  • @arianastinson7664
    @arianastinson7664 10 лет назад +235

    #14 WAS THE MOST HILARIOUS!!!!

    • @DrNeeDee
      @DrNeeDee 9 лет назад +15

      I think number three is the most funny because he treated them like dogs. lol!

    • @katieboliver7221
      @katieboliver7221 9 лет назад +1

      +DrNeeDee I know right?! lol XD

    • @Najeruss
      @Najeruss 5 лет назад +1

      Lmao

  • @pirateslayer8471
    @pirateslayer8471 5 лет назад +48

    #30 is priceless!
    ‘How high are you?
    ‘No officer,it’s hi, how are you!!!’’
    @3:12

  • @kevintheprf6132
    @kevintheprf6132 5 лет назад +203

    As an officer for 8 1/2 years, I heard number 50 way more than any others, lol.

    • @nckhrt
      @nckhrt 4 года назад

      KevinthePRF don’t mix baby Yoda with that God forsaken team (ps come back here if they draft tua)

    • @KodiFootball
      @KodiFootball 4 года назад +11

      Tbh, I can’t say the alphabet backwards.

    • @alexeckmanncavassa
      @alexeckmanncavassa 4 года назад

      @@nckhrt they wont draft tua

    • @nckhrt
      @nckhrt 4 года назад

      Alex Eckmann Cavassa probably not but I’m coming back here tmrw

    • @MikeNapoli1989
      @MikeNapoli1989 4 года назад

      KevinthePRF I believe it.

  • @charliemoore4567
    @charliemoore4567 5 лет назад +62

    “Oh so we’re gonna do it rough now huh?”
    “Guess it runs in the family”
    bro scooter a legend

    • @carterseaborn2536
      @carterseaborn2536 5 лет назад +1

      Sweaty Boi is that a black person joke? I didn’t really get it

    • @uniblizz2603
      @uniblizz2603 5 лет назад

      Carter Seaborn scooter is basically inferring that he smashed the officer’s mom Xd

    • @sardonumspa7474
      @sardonumspa7474 4 года назад

      UniBlizz it’s was just wife that he was referring to and when the cop tossed him on the car. When he said I guess it runs in the family. Referring that his wife like it rough (SEX)

  • @abdullahiqorane5681
    @abdullahiqorane5681 10 лет назад +138

    "I swear to high i'm not god" got me dying

  • @jedidand1446
    @jedidand1446 8 лет назад +69

    Officer, if I weren't drunk right now, I'd get out of this truck and kick your ass!

    • @JediDanD
      @JediDanD 8 лет назад +16

      Thanks for the ticket, officer shit head!

    • @TACOSMELL
      @TACOSMELL 8 лет назад +2

      JediDanD I want you to

    • @alexercolino6886
      @alexercolino6886 6 лет назад

      FmgJediDanD te

  • @IBandageTheDamage
    @IBandageTheDamage 9 лет назад +237

    Cops new food of choice: Chipotle
    I went into Chipotle one day and I swear the whole police squad was in there eating lunch.

    • @IBandageTheDamage
      @IBandageTheDamage 8 лет назад +6

      ***** it was a joke in case you didn't know

    • @supremelystupidsteven3310
      @supremelystupidsteven3310 7 лет назад

      SassySimmer i

    • @jessicatuepker1491
      @jessicatuepker1491 7 лет назад +1

      I see them in Subway all the time.

    • @LeeLoomis1988LegalRetard
      @LeeLoomis1988LegalRetard 7 лет назад

      ii Dont? Hate? The PoPos But ii Descendants Wonder what will Happen iF The Next Time i Hand My iD-card to Them PoPos and ii snap it innToo 2 Two iD-cards a Great magic Trick
      .
      and you LeFt out i wonder iF what Happen iF someBody say ii Hope The EarthLings HuMansLzing​ Race will BeComes​ Extinct again and and acting Like? you are praying Too The SenTencess Species who Made The universe Too Doo iT or? someThing
      ii can't SpecuLations​ Think what will Happen iF i snap My iD-card into 2 Two's iD-card
      a Great magic trick Turning 1 one iD-card innToo 2 Two iD-cards

    • @lpytvideos
      @lpytvideos 4 года назад

      I think they offer discounted meals to cops.

  • @3s1u17
    @3s1u17 5 лет назад +44

    RUclips:
    2013:not at all
    2014:nope
    2015:no
    2016:just a few more years
    2017:they can wait
    2018:not yet
    2019:fine well recommend it

  • @DQA-dm3il
    @DQA-dm3il 5 лет назад +40

    #4
    Dude I'm glad you guys are here yo someone stole all my weed

  • @Rowan-mo7bk
    @Rowan-mo7bk 6 лет назад +38

    Funniest ones: 96, 90, 75, 72, 66, 65, 62, 59, 58, 50, 43, 42, 22, 20, 16, 4,
    and my favorite is 43 and 16

  • @creation6582
    @creation6582 5 лет назад +29

    “ I didn’t know I was speeding I had my eyes closed” 😂

  • @realchevron511
    @realchevron511 10 лет назад +23

    Haha the one when he's all like " you know i was thinking of being a cop, but then i graduated from high school " hahahaha!!!!!

  • @davidowen7042
    @davidowen7042 8 лет назад +174

    "I swear to drunk, I'm not god"

    • @Willy72070
      @Willy72070 5 лет назад +4

      David Owen it was I swear to high stupid are you high?

    • @inkoinfinity2
      @inkoinfinity2 3 года назад

      @@Willy72070 it's from a song

    • @Willy72070
      @Willy72070 3 года назад

      @@inkoinfinity2 Yes and he said it wrong

  • @dixxy9406
    @dixxy9406 5 лет назад +8

    2:30 - That’s a really nice gun you have there wanna see mine? 🤣

  • @thearcadeproductions1140
    @thearcadeproductions1140 9 лет назад +56

    I swear to drunk I'm not God. XD

  • @jamiestarks79
    @jamiestarks79 10 лет назад +48

    OMG NUMBER 1 FTW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • @GOAT-po1ps
    @GOAT-po1ps 5 лет назад +8

    “Here you go officer oh wait that’s the fake one”
    😂😂

  • @katrinaumana2127
    @katrinaumana2127 10 лет назад +23

    OMG we didn't order any strippers was hilarious!!

  • @chrisbotos
    @chrisbotos 5 лет назад +7

    -How high are you?
    -No oFfiCeR iT's Hi hOw ArE yOu

  • @TVO_Hamza
    @TVO_Hamza 5 лет назад +10

    yo this man started to bribe the cops with a doughnut IM DONE

  • @brysonmeyer6545
    @brysonmeyer6545 10 лет назад +8

    I hear #1 at school all of the time it's hilarious
    😂

  • @lukemartin3646
    @lukemartin3646 5 лет назад +5

    “ I pay your salary”
    I love it
    Lmao

  • @slidone62
    @slidone62 10 лет назад +1

    love the fetch the donut ,gota be in shape to be a cop lmaoooo

  • @olivernelson224
    @olivernelson224 8 лет назад +76

    we didn't order strippers

  • @eeska4959
    @eeska4959 5 лет назад +6

    85+84
    “I DIDN’T KNOW I WAS SPEEDING!”
    *”my eyes were shut.”*
    ...
    i guess that’s reasonable.

  • @rhom.6704
    @rhom.6704 3 года назад

    There were SO SO SO many good ones I can't pick one...or five or ten. These are HILARIOUS (but I'm sure all have been used too many times). Luv you, SM!!

  • @heraniowagayen
    @heraniowagayen 11 лет назад +6

    16 was my fav

  • @antoniagallo2451
    @antoniagallo2451 9 лет назад +11

    30 OH MY GOD

  • @josephlara3397
    @josephlara3397 5 лет назад +1

    #24 popped a molly I’m sweating wooooowww!!! LMFAO 😂☠️

  • @MultiDancing1
    @MultiDancing1 9 лет назад +4

    "I'm not going back to jail." Classic.

  • @datvyper6678
    @datvyper6678 10 лет назад +36

    *Grabs donuts* "Take what you want, we call it even."

  • @riverlighttrider
    @riverlighttrider 9 лет назад

    I laughed at a few of these videos a while back and just saw them again and they are as funny as ever ... so I reposted them to facebook.... again

  • @TheRedSpyInTheBase
    @TheRedSpyInTheBase 8 лет назад +25

    16 XD ffs

  • @mjnieto9279
    @mjnieto9279 9 лет назад +7

    I'm crying right now 😂😂😂

  • @jerseycollectorjon93
    @jerseycollectorjon93 2 года назад

    “Oh my I’m so glad you guys are here. Look someone stole all my weed.” 😂😂lol #4

  • @garrettv219
    @garrettv219 6 лет назад +5

    #101: “There are people out there getting killed and shit, and you’re pulling me over for doing CRACK? You need to get your priorities straight”

  • @vanesszakovacs5615
    @vanesszakovacs5615 5 лет назад +3

    “I’m not going back to JAIL” XDDD

  • @arciliodiaz1019
    @arciliodiaz1019 5 лет назад

    IDK why but right off the bat at 99 killed me! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @xenomann442
    @xenomann442 11 лет назад +6

    16 definitely

  • @jabaricosby6362
    @jabaricosby6362 5 лет назад +4

    "What seems to be the officer problem ahh I'm high"
    "You know I could kill you if I wanted to right"😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @sarasartori5633
    @sarasartori5633 5 лет назад +1

    Hi! We loved your video!!! You are very funny and speak fast, we stayed shocked!! Kisses from brazil!! Fê e Sara

  • @alexandraholt1929
    @alexandraholt1929 9 лет назад +3

    54 is the best one!!!!!

  • @saulmoralez7830
    @saulmoralez7830 5 лет назад +3

    "She told me she was 18"😂

  • @broadcast20081
    @broadcast20081 8 лет назад

    I loved the #64. "You gotta be in shape for being a police officer.... what a heck..."???? ...... LOL!!!!!!

  • @bino9138
    @bino9138 5 лет назад +3

    #96- "I already hid the body"

  • @da-grinch6924
    @da-grinch6924 6 лет назад +7

    You forgot, if you didn't have that badge and gun 👊🏽

  • @amanamongmachines
    @amanamongmachines 6 лет назад

    I really needed a laugh today & somehow found this... it's hilarious. Thank you Scooter!

  • @bilalpowellisthegoat3375
    @bilalpowellisthegoat3375 8 лет назад +9

    59 and 58 😂😂😂💀💀💀💀👌

  • @whodat9286
    @whodat9286 8 лет назад +3

    Subbing right now

  • @vzm4663
    @vzm4663 5 лет назад +2

    "What seems to be the officer, problem?"
    My goodness 😂

  • @pb43yt
    @pb43yt 5 лет назад +3

    who is here in 2019 and just got this in reconmendations

  • @chaotic7539
    @chaotic7539 6 лет назад +3

    2:14 is genius

  • @danallyhennessee9603
    @danallyhennessee9603 9 лет назад

    Cracking up!! "that's all you got" love it!

  • @CarsandChris
    @CarsandChris 5 лет назад +5

    2019 quality in 2013 how the...

  • @melissawilliams741
    @melissawilliams741 10 лет назад +13

    #(62) i swear to high, hahahaha, i'm not god. i'm not god, hahahahahahaha.

  • @Carol-ex7lh
    @Carol-ex7lh 6 лет назад

    Guy you the best and I seriously hope that you get way more subs

  • @hollisfortune8791
    @hollisfortune8791 5 лет назад +3

    “ I thought you to be in good shape to be a police officer”

  • @oddbigking9069
    @oddbigking9069 4 года назад +3

    “I thought I smelled doughnuts”

  • @BoosterStqts
    @BoosterStqts 6 лет назад

    “Bad cop, no donut!” that one gave me a good laugh...

  • @lindstheteacher1611
    @lindstheteacher1611 5 лет назад +4

    Shootout to the cops who were in this video. Thank you for your service.
    Hilarious video😂

  • @kylemalachowski
    @kylemalachowski 5 лет назад +17

    “No hablo ingles”
    “That means u don’t speak English”
    🤦‍♂️

  • @Duster29to86
    @Duster29to86 9 лет назад

    this had me in tears. greatly enjoyed it.

  • @masonsanders5623
    @masonsanders5623 7 лет назад +12

    63 is a good strategy.

  • @denzil547
    @denzil547 8 лет назад +3

    61 & 16😂

  • @beastshootergaming2798
    @beastshootergaming2798 7 лет назад +1

    "You're not going to find anything i already hid the body"😂😂

  • @benhochgesang7622
    @benhochgesang7622 6 лет назад +4

    71

  • @theunderdawg.
    @theunderdawg. 7 лет назад +5

    "It's because I'm black isn't it?"

  • @zacwr13
    @zacwr13 4 года назад +1

    “I’m not gonna lie if you don’t let me go I’m take a dump in my pants” 🤣🤣

  • @notahouse2008
    @notahouse2008 5 лет назад +7

    How high are you?
    *137 cm*

  • @naomio01
    @naomio01 10 лет назад +10

    Definetly 16,13,11,9,5,4,3

  • @m.pervious363
    @m.pervious363 10 лет назад

    They are all hilarious. I have watched this so many times and can't stop laughing or pick just one!

  • @bilalpowellisthegoat3375
    @bilalpowellisthegoat3375 8 лет назад +8

    What's the officer, problem?
    What's the problem officer * is what he meant to say if any of you guys haven't watched it yet. He went on to say
    "Sorry im high"

    • @joshuahuf9747
      @joshuahuf9747 7 лет назад +4

      Bilal Powell is the GOAT fuckinh no shit

  • @aolcom-nl9qb
    @aolcom-nl9qb 9 лет назад +4

    The most important thing you should do is shut up and listen, if the cop is wrong pay attention to detail follow up later , then report the incident to their chain of command or internal affairs allow them all to do their jobs in figuring it out!! Finally if all else fails get a lawyer to sue, but you need to be right about what your actions were.

    • @sierraloger2567
      @sierraloger2567 9 лет назад +1

      I wish there was a dislike button on comments 😕

    • @aolcom-nl9qb
      @aolcom-nl9qb 9 лет назад

      You didn't get my point, but no big deal anyway!

  • @mrbubbles2388
    @mrbubbles2388 4 года назад

    "What seems to be the officer, problem" that is my absolute favorite lol

  • @absentcoder4552
    @absentcoder4552 9 лет назад +3

    How to say the alphabet backwards:
    1. Say teb-afla-et.
    2. Done.

  • @andrealmoseley6575
    @andrealmoseley6575 5 лет назад

    The one that got us stuck for an hour at the Juarez border crossing, "ARE YOU KIDDING?" :)

  • @anthony.morini
    @anthony.morini 5 лет назад

    “What seems to be the officer, problem... I’m high.”😂
    “Oh, that’s the fake one” 😂

  • @fizzywizzylemonsqueezy1774
    @fizzywizzylemonsqueezy1774 5 лет назад

    This channel is soooooooo underrated

  • @ousmanann8773
    @ousmanann8773 5 лет назад

    Ur a 🐐 for adding the Tunchi bar

  • @NickCorvello
    @NickCorvello 5 лет назад

    Well, playing bad boys during a pullover worked for Gabriel Iglesias so singing it can't be too bad :)

  • @ambuhh
    @ambuhh 10 лет назад

    I LOVE all of them!!! I watch it like 5,000 times!!!!! #lovethisguy!!!

  • @ernestthecheaterfuckedupfl9329
    @ernestthecheaterfuckedupfl9329 6 лет назад

    I died when he said oh you like it rough must run in the family 🤣🤣🤣😂☠☠

  • @XavierSchwartzTheOriginal
    @XavierSchwartzTheOriginal 4 года назад

    I luv any of the donut ones. But I think #14 is the best

  • @carloseduardooliveira9585
    @carloseduardooliveira9585 5 лет назад

    The best video I saw

  • @BabyKrazy714
    @BabyKrazy714 6 лет назад

    #40 had me rolling hahaha

  • @ninjasammy41
    @ninjasammy41 5 лет назад +1

    Subbed

  • @abbyhowston8212
    @abbyhowston8212 9 лет назад

    Cop: do u know y I pulled u over.Citizen: because u ran out of tic tacos and want some of mine

  • @resaliate
    @resaliate 7 лет назад

    Dude you are so funny I am dying xDD please make more

  • @daniellemoews6507
    @daniellemoews6507 9 лет назад

    number 30 was just too funny!

  • @CheckTMOW
    @CheckTMOW 4 года назад +1

    51 startles me every time I watch it and I've seen it like 10 times

  • @dannydanggang1675
    @dannydanggang1675 6 лет назад

    I was waiting for #1

  • @tomerzur5388
    @tomerzur5388 5 лет назад

    30 was the best i was dieing from laughter

  • @zoenightshade6112
    @zoenightshade6112 4 года назад

    18.) bad boys bad boys whatcha gonna do whatcha gonna do
    ha I love that song as the theme song for Cops XD