Should married couples have single friends?
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- Опубликовано: 30 сен 2024
- Should married couples have single friends? Is it good for a husband to have a female best friend? Or a wife to have male friends? This video dives into the reality of married life surrounded by single-hood.
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I really dislike when people say married people shouldn’t have single friends. I think opposite sex friends should have boundaries but people say this about same sex friends. Had my friends dumped me because I was single, I would have no friends. It took me 35 years to find my person.
Also, I was single, but I understand people and my married friends say that I actually give some of the best advice. I just was unlucky in love because of situations out of my own control. She said that my advice has helped her marriage last almost 15 years.
Married people think that other people are going to destroy them. Sorry to tell you, but there are some of us that feel sadness whilst having to hear how married lives are so great, while keeping the compliments and the smiles flowing. It gets to the point where they are always bragging or upping the conversation. It's upsetting when married friends want to be all up in my business as to why I'm not married. I end up revealing a part of my painful history, just to answer the nagging questions, and after that, ask my married friend to just drop the hurtful topic. Maybe married people should stop saying single people should be protected against. I have had more harm done to me living as a single by married people in their everyday conversations! Single people in general are not attracted to married people at all!
married people are their own worst enemeis, not single folks.
I so felt this! Hope that you heal and find a happy and loving relationship.
Exactly!
This video showed up in my algorithm, and it looked interesting. I agree. Being single, I'm not even thinking of my married friend's spouse in that way. Or anyone else's spouse in that way.
First, I'm not a mate poacher. There are mate poachers and people that don't care about someone's marriage. I think that needs to be said. Mate poachers can be still married and looking to social climb there way up to a new relationship. The person needs discernment and figure out how the married spouse is around mate poachers.
To say single people aren’t attracted to married people is in sensitive and you sound kind of ignorant.
Like your opinion I understand some married people do the most to say their married but there are billions of jezebels including people we call our own friends, and until you are actually married you get that..
Single people DONT get that. Most single people .. not all but most
I am divorced and currently not in a relationship, my married girlfriend says she can't go out to lunch or do a day of fun with me because she's married?????HUH? Im older not a 20 something, why would she not be able to go to lunch and a movies say???? this really has me stumped , Does she think because Im single that Im not on the same level? This hurt, I told her that and that I'll never ask her to do anything with me again and that I will let her know when I am in a relationship or married and maybe we can rekindle our friendship!
That’s fowl. She’s not a real friend.
SAY IT!!!!....I’ve seen soooo many relationships destroyed because of this. Great advice!!!!! Keep up the great work!!!
We appreciate the love and support
So you're saying that single people cannot be friends with couples?
@louisescott5836 The devil will do everything and anything to open up your marriage to infidelity and an affair. You are playing with fire by having opposite sex "friends" in the confines of marriage.
This the reason people are unhappy 😂 do what works for you , not being mean but who are you trying to convince us or her !
True lol. Do y’all thing and stop blaming single people lol.
I have a situation where my husband has a bad attitude with me but he has this female friend he is always helping her and talking to her on the phone. I confronted him because I heard him tell her that they should meet up to talk about a problem she has. When I told him I didn’t like that he told her they should meet up he got defensive and told me I was sick of jealousy. I told him his friendship is disrespecting me as he treats her better than me, he just sees me as a lunatic and doesn’t realize he has cross the line.
My ex was the same way, he treat me like something he stepped in while treating his female friend like a princess. When I raised the issue, he played the jealousy card. Ending that relationship was the best thing I ever did.
No. He's the one who should apologize. And I'm not even from the states. Even across cultures, what he did is wrong
Hopefully things got better for you or you walked away. That’s straight up disrespectful behavior.
@@hellosunnymorning why would a single woman go seek for a married man for help? Or worse go out with them without their spouse. That is plain disrespectful here and in China. Don’t do things that are “good” but look bad and if you see that as normal you are playing with fire. That If it was me giving my attention to another man it wouldn’t be normal for him anymore.
@@hellosunnymorninggood for you hope one day with that intelligence you learn values.
Singleness, unwanted singleness is horrible, painful and isolating enough. May you never experience it.
I got to the point to where I rather stay home and do nothing than mingle, and even if I mingle Im not the one to usually strike up something, so I'm likely to just hang around and see what's going on
this is silly, usually the friends who are most of a threat to your marriage: OTHER MARRIED 'FRIENDS'.... it ain't singles pulling marrieds into their bullshit. Its marrieds DIVING into situations. Singles just end up being the scapegoat.
In our 22 years of experience working with couples & families, we’ve found that both married & singles are human. Humans are attracted to other humans. Which if unguarded can lead to adultery. The point is not that singles are ‘less than’ in any way. Not saying singles are on the prowl so couples beware! (Every married person was once single) it’s that there’s a different focus of life pathways. Married folks would do well to be encouraged by and to do life with someone who understands their struggle
If you are wise & single you will not have many Married Friends at all anyway. Only mainly necessary Associates not Friends. Why bc Married ppl & Single ppl live in 2 different worlds with completely different rules & laws (Unrelatable).
Also most Single ppl only remind Married ppl of the life they Gave Up. And most Married ppl only remind single ppl of why they don't desire to be Married.
@@AfroPick82 life is so Spontaneous I watched marry friends become single and the single friend become married. Choose friends based off of character not roles
@@SeanandLanette I’ve been married and I am single now. I was a wife who always looked at the singe women as the culprit. You will find out while hanging with other marrieds that familiarity breeds. Mary affairs actually start with married couples. And YES the body of Christ treat single women as jealous Jezebels lol. I have had a taste of my own medicine now that I am the single one.
The problem I see with some couples is? They go to single people for advice instead of other couples for advice. What couples doing theses things don’t understand a single person isn’t gonna know how too counsel a person in a relationship! Not saying singles can’t give advice but it’s hard for us too relate to something we never been in. It’ll be easy for a single person too say just leave if y’all can’t get alone because they don’t know what relationship love feel like. One thing I’ll say to couples that’s having problems stop playing the blame game it don’t fix anything. Look for the good in each other instead of only focusing on the bad things the flaws cause we all imperfect people we make mistakes but there’s a difference between being abusive mental abuse vs just he left the toilet seat up example.
I disagree. I just don’t date weak minded, deceptive, insecure people. I don’t want to walk on egg shells. If I have to cut people out of my life, then I don’t want you. Marriage is the coming together of two lives, that doesn’t mean you have to become someone else, to be with that person.
NOPE‼️ BECAUSE that JEALOUSY BE REAL‼️PPL ya think happy 4 ya are REALLY ENVIOUS 🎯💯
#then the married couple wondering why issues and problems are occuring 🤔 CHECK YA CIRCLE🎯WOLVES in SHEEP CLOTHING AND it DOESN'T MATTER HOW LONG YOU'VE KNOWN THE PERSON 💯
#they smile in ya face and the whole time wanna take ya place BACKSTABBERS 💯
#i chose to NEVER get married again💯i LOVVVVE MY FREEDOM 🎯💯✊🏾😁🤩
We single people are too busy just trying to survive. Some of you will find out when you get to the other side.
Married couple, both of them MUST be theirown bestfriend,.
why need to have another single friend especially if it in opposite gender if you have already have your own bestfriend with your spouse?
Protect your covenant with the Lord.
Questions like these are why it is important to marry someone that you're friends with.
Agree 1000%
That sucks....
I definitely no longer heard from friends who became married
I guess thats the way it is
Yup
Insecure much?
NO! Because that opposite sex single friend will become the shoulder to cry on when things hit a rough patch in the marriage and then the devil will open up all the doors to infidelity and an affair. You're playing with fire by having "friends" of the opposite sex in the confines of marriage. I don't care if this approach sounds old school or if haters try and say to me that "you're just an abusive, insecure, jealous, controlling, manipulative person for doing this. Don't you trust your wife?" You bet I do, but I also know that very rarely does a man stay "friends" with a woman who he doesn't have feelings for. And worse of all I can't help but feel those opposite sex "friends" are just waiting in the wings licking their chops for their turns just hoping your marriage will fail. So you bet I see any of these opposite sex "friends" in the confines of a marriage as a threat. I'm about to hit my 30s and still waiting for God's timing to bless me with the wife he has in store for me in His time, but I for one will be making sure I have no other friends of the opposite sex except in the picture at all except her. Can't risk any temptations like this. A Christian marriage needs to be guarded/defended like your life depends on it because it literally does. And that means sacrificing existing friendships with the opposite sex so the devil can't tempt you with infidelty and having an affair. Sadly most of my millennial generation doesn't seem to understand this concept.
So I met a married couple at church.. So the wife for some reason became focused on me. Mentor I guess.. I don't hang in groups , I not part of the cool girls club. # Back up, leave me alone ...i don't want to be accused of no one's man. Period!!....I love the way this husband said cover yourself. He ran it down.🤣.. I wish I didn't give my number to the church. I visited.
..I have issues, and been hurt to many time.. I don't do drama. At 60yrs young I don't want any wolves in sheep clothing in my life.. My mental barn is closed..I can't house the sheeps .💒💒. The Womanish tho..❤
REPENT FOR THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN IS AT HAND TURN FROM SIN AND TURN TOWARDS RIGHTEOUSNESS THROUGH CHRIST JESUS
JESUS CHRIST IS COMING BACK SOON AND WE MUST BE READY FOR WHEN HE COMES BACK
It's ok to stay close with your friends after marriage right? All of mine are married as well and my wife seems to think that a "man" shouldn't be talking with friends and seeing them. Says a man should only focus their family.. mind you I never ever get to see my friends and the rare occasion I text or talk to them, I'm usually shamed for it. I feel that this is control and ultimately abusive.
Thoughts?
It’s definitely healthy to have friends. The family is the number one priority of the marriage. So long as that priority is expressed in quality time, there should be no reason for a lack of friendship time. Maybe you both can discuss the frequency of friendship time. Sometimes one spouse is more outgoing and social than the other. So I’d suggest a conversation about your values and express your needs.
I don’t think so!! I had a so called friend, who didn’t have the money I have and she wanted me to pay for her vacations because she didn’t have much money. But, her husband brought a truck for 75 thousand dollars and he treats her like “S”! She had two babies in high school and one after high school. Her present husband left her high and dry after high school and married someone else. Twenty five years later came back to married her and he treats her bad. I have struggled to send myself to school, no kids, and don’t beg or look to others to pay my bills. She has been married to him for thirty years and refuse to discuss with him how he treats her. He tried to tell me off because I refuse to have her come for a vacation in my house. I am in my seventies, with a heart problem and other illnesses. She don’t understand this and want me to fit the vacation bill for her. Yes!! I am angry, but I had to fake my death to get away from her and I also saw the real her and him as a result. Married people and single people think I have money to do what they want. Hell to the No! No! No one gives me a Christmas gift or a birthday gift. I do everything for myself. I have been giving in the past, but enough is enough!! I am looking out for number one now. Call me selfish if you want but I am tried of being baby, baby the fool!!! Oh! I had a so called friend to give me a cup with peppermint candy in it for Christmas and right in front of me gave another friend a beautiful sweater. That tells me that she didn’t think of me as a friend. I don’t deserve crumbles and I don’t give crumbles. So, if I meet a so called friend who wants to treat me like mess, I will go get a loaf of bread and will never come back.
People who have friends of opposite sex should not get married. Your spouse should be your only friend of opposite sex.
So you throw away your best friend, who's as close as any brother or sister, because you are entering marriage. I guess your personal window of interactions and opportunity may be limited. I am single and have friends and co-workers that are married. You're saying that you've got conditional friends. Glad you are in a durable marriage.
@@71757097 probably?
I known some people I thought i got along with well until they became married, never really heard from them anymore
@scaldon2 NAILED IT! Having opposite sex "friends" in the confines of marriage is playing with fire for the devil opening doors to infidelity and having an affair.
@@fargeeks they weren't real friends
@@seankeys5384 which begs the question
How did other people get along with them?
Mentoring the opposite sex...I don't believe that should happen. If the husband learns of a women that needs mentoring then he should refer her to his wife or another woman in the church if the wife can't or won't. The same thing if the wife knows a man that needs mentoring. Men understand men and women understand women. In a same sex mentoring scenario discussions are free to become more personal if need be without toeing the line of inappropriate sharing, etc. The same for counseling. Either mentor/counsel the same sex or do so as a team.
Thanks for this. I’ve been feeling the need to create distance between myself and my single girlfriends and this was the validation I needed. Wishing you 2 a lifelong union of happiness 🙂
We appreciate the love and support
Totally understand. I’m single and have a very hard time having married friends. It’s sad, but the truth is it does a number on my self esteem. I no longer feel like those friends can understand my plight. In my case, it seriously strikes a nerve whenever my married friends ask “Are you dating anyone?” I despise the question (even though I know it may be well intended), and to answer no makes me feel so low on myself and like a failure. I have come to realize people make comments like “it happens when you least expect it or are not looking” or “there’s a lid for every pot,” etc and they are complete BS. Those comments may be well intended, but it’s just what people say to be nice when they don’t know what else to say. If they were true, no one would be single anymore. That is fact. I just cant do it anymore. They can no longer relate. It doesn’t make them bad people of course, but I have to do what’s best for me. And what hurts the most is how quickly people forget what it was like for them when they were single. It’s mind boggling. These are friends who vented as much as I did, and it’s like they don’t even remember that person once existed anymore or aren’t even the same person. It makes me lose respect for them. It’s like a celebrity who forgot his or her roots. Everytime I talk to them it’s now “we this” or “we that.” I feel like I can never talk to the individual person anymore. I can’t relate to those people anymore. I need friends I can relate to.
@@rockybalboa4593 It's true. If the married couple has no discernment. That is their problem. I would never be friends with either of them.
Marriage itself is very insular. ie. Only hanging out with couples etc. They give up friendships and wonder why they don't have those friends until year 12 into the marriage.
I had a female married friend vent to me about her marriage problem, and I was like. Girl, I don't want to hear it. Her life became boring, which is no problem but at least be honest. I ended up giving her space.
I think this is where single people need to shed some light. We are not after your spouse! Could care less. Being a good friend, I'd caution them to watch the mate poachers and social climbers. That can involve other married couples who don't have ethics. Not just single people.
I would cutoff anybody before it starts problems. I already learned my leson of liking someone else and entertaining other men. I rather have no men friends that start issues in a marriege. Im single thats how serious i see marriege.
In light of recent events this is prophetic and much needed!
One of my wife’s closest friends is in an open relationship and the other might as well be because they both cheat. I don’t like these type of women because they can influence bad behavior and give horrible advice based on their immoral views
What is your advice when one spouse has friends who are the opposite sex but those friends are gay? Is it the same thing as having friends of the opposite sex?
I hate that I’m even watching this or that I’m commenting.. It’s driving me crazy though! My husband has a friend of the opposite sex who is single, that I’m not friends with. I’ve heard she has bad intentions especially with married men. I’m uncomfortable with the fact they text and call each other damn near every day.. I don’t know what they’re talking about or what’s going on. I’m not a crazy jealous person like I used to be, but to me I don’t think it’s right. I don’t text or call guys because I don’t want my husband to get upset with me. And I definitely don’t want him to feel as insecure or upset like I’ve been feeling lately because of it! I hate these feelings because it reminds me of my past with my ex who had a best friend of the opposite sex and he ended up cheating on me with her. Definitely a dangerous territory. I used to feel like we were best friends, like it should be in a marriage. But now I have this chick interfering and I don’t know how to deal with it.. 😩
Going through same thing exactly!
Same here.
Maybe y'all need to have a conversation about your thoughts on having opposite-sex friends.
Your husband is dishonoring you, plain and simple. Marriage is a sacrifice, and as a man, you have to sacrifice all your female friends. They no longer have a place in marriage. He probably gets an ego boost from her, and rest assured she is 100% a threat to you.
If your husband is unwilling to drop her, that says a lot about him and what he puts 1st.
Tell him. Set your boundary. Why you scared of your partner knowing how you feel.
I have a lot of single acquaintances. And I work will a large amount of them, I also do no hangout with single males or females. Energies transfer. You keep single friends you start acting single.
So once folks get married do they just lose long time friends who happen to be single? Doesn’t sound like a true friendship in my opinion
Got to use discernment. Each situation is different. I grew up as a kid in the jahova witness. And they all mingle with eachother. Theres younge people befriend elderly and is a big social club. So im used to having men friends but i see people outside get very jelousy.
Thanks. Don't stop please. God bless you all....
I have the problem of a singe Male friend of my husband calling him 5 to 6 times every day. Wanting to come over all the time. Sometime I just want a day that I can spend time with my husband with out interruption. My husbands friend wants to know where we are going and when we are coming back. I think single men should spend time with other singe men. Not try to come in the middle of a married couple. There has been times when married men that were not happy with their wives thought that they could come and interrupt my household. I know I'm not the only one that feels this way. Not saying married men can't be friends with single friends just not hanging out all the time. I have a couple of single female friends and they respect my marriage. Are this men jealous of what my husband and I have Because that's what older women tell me.
I’m having the same issue in my marriage right now and it has caused so many issues ! I don’t know what else to do! We have been arguing and it has gotten worse
@@Jollymomof4 It helps to talk to older people about this. My husband talked to his friend and things are better now.
@@tinaproctor7468 I tried that yesterday and he said he is not listening to nobody! We talked to our married friends last night and he acted like he was going to change and then now today he said he is not listening to anyone. The bad part is this male friend is our employee!
@@Jollymomof4 Maybe go back to the RUclips couple and ask them this question , see what advice they give you in this situation. I hope things become better for you.
@@tinaproctor7468 thank you
I don't think the romantic type of love is special. And I am started to think that the romantic type of love isn't real. I mean about more than half of romantic couples either break up with each other or divorce each other, while most platonic best friends remain friends until death.
Also, most people are pretty much comfortable enough to be naked around someone and have sex with someone that they have no romantic feelings towards. So sex isn't really a thing about romance.
I think that having a platonic best friend is a lot better than having a romantic partner or spouse is. Having someone who's like a sibling to you is a lot better than having a romantic partner is. Also, you would more likely be much closer to a person who's like a brother or sister to you than you would be with a partner or spouse.
People tend to fight with their partner or spouse a lot more than they do with a platonic best friend, and you never fight with your best friend the way you fight with your partner or spouse. Partners and spouses are just temporary. If you break up or divorce them, it's hard to go back to them. With your platonic best friend, you're going to make things work, because they are your best friend, they are your go to partner. It's always easier to make amends with them than it is with a romantic partner or spouse.
Also, there are a lot of toxic romantic relationships, while there isn't that many toxic platonic relationships. Like an example is that abuse happens a lot in romantic relationships, while abuse is rare in platonic relationships. So there is a lot of abusive romantic relationships, while there is isn't that many abusive platonic relationships.
Why do you think abusive romantic relationships have a term for them called "domestic violence", while abusive platonic relationships don't have a term for them? It's because abuse in platonic relationships are very rare, while abuse in romantic relationships happens a lot.
And also, a lot of people cheat on their romantic partners with someone else, while most people won't do stuff like that with their platonic best friends.
Also, I heard that most people can live a life without romance and can still be happy. But most of the time, if someone doesn't have any platonic friends in their life, it can effect them really bad mentally; much worse than living a life without a romantic partner. In today's world, less people are dating and getting married now, and they seem to be more happy being single rather than being in romantic relationship with someone.
Also, you're going to have a much deeper spoken understanding and connection with your best friend than you are with a romantic partner or spouse.
So those are other reasons why romantic love isn't real or special, while platonic love is.
I have a question.... What if your spouse's opposite sex friend was once more than a friend.... Should they continue in that friendship having DM's and lunch on occasion (with other mutual friends in public)? Is that not stepping on hot coals as far as temptation goes?
Absolutely. It’s hard to navigate current boundaries when past boundaries for that relationship had a very different context. Expressing your heart and open communication on both sides is needed. Giving you room to share what you see and him take immediate action if needed.
You 2 are weird
My Christian boyfriend ready to propose to me dumped me on text because he did not want to put aside his ex wife, other married women and single woman in his life. But yet used to resound in my ear Ephesians 5:20 onwards Husbands love your wives but dumped me calling me jealous because of the women in his life!! Go figure!!
I’m almost in the same boat
Of course you can..you just have to LIMIT what you do AND where you go..and how LATE you stay out...
I would never hang with a married couple. They want you in their bed and be in your business. I said it.
My husband has a best female friend and female friends. There has been a lot of conflict and tension throughout the process. But how am I supposed to feel if they only really want to hang out with my husband and only want him to go out clubbing, dinner. I have met them and know them but they still only txt him to hang out. Not saying “you guys”. Just asking if he can hang. Is it wrong for me not to want to be around? Or not particularly like these friends? Do I need to be included in these friendship when married?
Much respect i just got married in I love this video god bless the both of you
Husbands going on trips with a single guy friend.. a trip to Vegas?
The fact that this even a discussion is so weird.
I love this video♥️
Oh great! Thank you so much
But even with that you have to be careful being with the same couple all the time. Women who say they don’t like other women is because they are attention seekers! Men and women see each other are potential partners unless they are grandparents
Wow this!
Ah so sweet yeah yeah says every couple TILL > next year OR WHENEVER then its so sorry to hear that at the club/church wherever.
Powerful stuff
Nice !!
Oooh lord so much wisdom here. Thank you so much for sharing all these.
Awesome video!!!!!! Thank you!!!
I agree with you
....1:16 was right on POINT!!!
Hello,
What do yall recommend a couple should do when one spouse tells the other everthing and the other feels that they shouldn't have to tell the other everything. Specifically, say one spouse is talking to a friend and that friend tells them something in confidence (not a counselor but a friend) should that individual keep what their friend said a secret from their spouse?
Mikayla Rhodus that’s a one to reply to without knowing specific details. But in general transparency is key to a marriage. The question I’d ask is, is the spouse that doesn’t share as much simply less talkative and more of an active listener? Some people are being secretive though. There are lots of variables from personalities to upbringing etc. what I’d suggest is an open dialogue about their method of communication. Not accusing them but inquiring regarding their preference when it comes to sharing their thoughts
That's the spouse's friend, why would he/ she have to tell their friend's business to their spouse. So you can't keep your friend's confidential information because you are married.
@@maridiyaibrahim8210 some people feel they cannot have ANY secrets from their spouse
@@LisaLisaCJWhy get married if there are secrets? What type of secrets that are worth hiding?
That's ridiculous! What about a married man that MUST have a business lunch with a Female client?? They DON'T need a chaperone!! They're GROWN for God's sake! So YOU'RE saying men and women CAN'T BE JUST FRIENDS ?? Well I'm here to tell you they CAN!
Of course a business lunch is fine, it’s a public space and you’re covered. And you’re grown, you can do what you want. But take into account how many marriages ended in affairs, how many people have betrayed trust. Why because they didn’t have boundaries. Fences keep things in and also prevent things from getting out. Look up the stats on divorce, infidelity and how many families are torn apart as a result. Tell me then we don’t need wise boundaries. You can have single friends, just be smart about it
I even heard a dating Coach say men and women cannot be friends
The reality seems harsh
Now i see why when a man see a lady they like, they want them as their lover not as a friend
A client and a friend are two different things
Business is way different than friends... I highly doubt my lady will be mad for me to have a business deal with the opposite and it's gonna make me like $100k.
God made a woman for man.......Most of the time, opposite sex cannot just be friend's, I personally don't think it's worth the risk and headache.
@@PatCrawford5 They CAN, but it depends on the two people. If there's no ROMANTIC attraction between the two of them, then YES they CAN be just friends!
It still amazes me that people have forgotten that Jesus had a female friend! She probably wasnt a "temptation" for him, but a "person" that he really liked. First religion started regulating love, opening the door to evil. Now friendship is a dangerous thing! Wow! If you have no enemies then you need to create them, I guess? Your spouse is NOT your best friend! She/he is your spouse. There is a big difference. A romantic relationship is so much deeper and powerful than friendship. If tou own a car, you wouldnt say: "this is the best bicycle I have ever had!".
Thanks for commenting. I’m of the school of thought that a spouse can be both and rather than either or. A spouse can be best friend and spouse. No different than me being a child of God and called by God his friend. Doesn’t have to be mutually exclusive. And suggesting that people guard their friendships is not a regulation of love but good old fashioned wisdom. You can love all people and have “singles” as friends, the point of the video is to emphasize caution as a person protecting their integrity from an obvious open door to temptation
Jesus wasn't married nor was he capable of being tempted so what's your point?..N/A
@@amarantineevol4192 Amen!
Hope u never get married. It’s easy, if ur not willing to give up friendships of the opposite sex for the sake of marriage and u don’t understand that your spouse becomes your number one priority than any other man or other woman at the moment u said "I do", stay single. You can’t have it all.
When people get married their focus shifts to their spouse and family. As a single person I will focus on myself and being happy. Jesus is the only friend I need.
My husband won’t let his single female friend go. He says that she is just a friend although everything’s says different He won’t introduce us either. She was a secret friend that I had to find out about. So divorce is inevitable. He rather be divorced anyway.
You sound insecure
Get you a friend too