Got a workplace bully? Do this next

Поделиться
HTML-код
  • Опубликовано: 24 дек 2024

Комментарии • 308

  • @NostalgiaVibes420
    @NostalgiaVibes420 Год назад +407

    I’m dealing with Someone like this now in the workplace. This guy is absolutely disgusting, I really want to give up. I believe he’s trying to set me up to be fired! Individuals who try to sabotage another worker is just evil and pathetic to me. It’s very demoralizing to deal with such a person.

    • @cassandrastar3473
      @cassandrastar3473 Год назад +22

      Same! And agree. Hang in there and get support. You're worth it

    • @HildaVeronicaMosqueira
      @HildaVeronicaMosqueira Год назад +8

      exactly!! specially with the ones using religion to attack with the Bible on hand and teaming up!!!

    • @Ashbash-kf5xd
      @Ashbash-kf5xd Год назад +12

      I have the same thing going on right now, and he’s manipulating everyone else to kind of turn against me, but listen my friend, he hasn’t been there in 2 days and in those 2 days I found out everyone else dislikes him as much as I do! So hang in there. Things will get better and if they don’t tell someone, tell HR, tell whoever you need to to get support and speak to your supervisor about it, and where you stand on your work with them, and not this individual, if it’s your supervisor being the bully, go to the next person you feel comfortable with. I really really pray it gets better for both of us. Be true to you tho first. You are worth it, you are important, and you are accepted! ❤

    • @mosaic.owl.studios
      @mosaic.owl.studios Год назад +10

      ​@Ashbash-kf5xd You just gave away one of the bully's biggest secrets. They will work tirelessly and relentlessly to convince everyone else around them that they are so well-liked by the others around them that you dare not ever say anything bad about them. IT'S A TRICK. It's usually never true. Usually, just like you said, everyone else actually dislikes the bully and thinks THEY are a loser. They never want you to know this secret, because they believe most of their power lies in fooling people into thinking they are something they are not (a decent and respectable person).

    • @SiGa-i1r
      @SiGa-i1r 11 месяцев назад +7

      ​@user-re3ws9rd3 What do you mean? The Bible speaks against bullying which is oppression. Only heretics bully.

  • @whitneyhowlandspropcomedy6924
    @whitneyhowlandspropcomedy6924 5 месяцев назад +98

    People at work are not your friends. Knowing that is the biggest step toward not being a target of bullying or manipulation. The next step is learning to speak up when you start to resent something.

    • @rockhaze
      @rockhaze 4 месяца назад +21

      I feel like speaking up only makes you a target, because then they are aware that YOU are aware, and then they feel the need to double-down to silence/squelch you.

    • @FeliciaStands
      @FeliciaStands 2 месяца назад +8

      @@rockhazethat’s their goal and it just continues document and report it they can’t fire you for reporting misconduct it’s considered retaliation journal document always

  • @TonyZmex
    @TonyZmex Месяц назад +17

    If the bully is your boss you are screwed. Plan your exit strategy and as soon as you can LEAVE!

  • @irmareyes8911
    @irmareyes8911 10 месяцев назад +84

    Yes this bullying has been happening since high school, it’s always that one person that lacks confidence in themselves, and the bully tends to manipulate others to make me look bad! People bully me because I am confident nice polite down to earth, going above and beyond at my job and lazy people hate that. I’m always thinking positive even though my personal life is broken specially since I lost one of my kids. I’m afraid to complain because people tend to believe the bully lies over the truth

    • @Killahsoftly
      @Killahsoftly 7 месяцев назад +8

      I'm so sorry for your loss. You're blessed in spirit and kindness and have taught anyone who has read your message, how to add value to life in the face of great loss. You're still setting an example on how to live with purpose for your children and those around you. I'm not sure of your beliefs on death, but I feel that your child will be so proud of you when you're reunited after this life. You're walking a divine and high path - it's often a solo journey that is meant to elevate your life purpose and soul consciousness and also is to teach others that they can choose different paths and can attempt to reach the heights you walk at or maybe go higher in time. And lastly, you're totally right abt how bullies are often protected and the victim is further harmed. I wish I had advice for you. Tmrw I'm going no communication with my work place bully. In the sense that I won't be available for his toxic language and energy. I will keep or dialogue to a strict minimum - he should be ok with it bc it's obvs he hates me and hates engaging with me. I've chosen to see him as solidly as a foe and I won't allow myself to engage with trying to fix the situation bw us. He chose his path. I'll try my new path out and keep a robotic business only dialogue with him. I won't respond if he asks me anything that is beyond his job title.

  • @elbowstrike
    @elbowstrike Год назад +142

    I always attract workplace bullying out of being a high performer. HR and bosses have never helped so I changed my behaviour and stopped being such a high performer. It’s a private company not a worker-owned cooperative the relationship is entirely transactional. Only work hard enough not to get fired. If they wanted more out of you then they would treat you better.

    • @rockhaze
      @rockhaze 4 месяца назад +6

      I really don't get why the high performer gets bullied. Isn't that what management wants? A workhorse? You'd think it makes their lives easier, they don't have to lift a finger to keep their useless jobs.

    • @elbowstrike
      @elbowstrike 4 месяца назад

      @@rockhaze because the managers are insecure and on the spectrum of one or more mental disorders where social status is extremely important to them and the workhorse is seen as a threat to their social status.
      Take one thousand people representing the entire variety of the human population’s personalities. Now line them up in order of how important social status is to them. All of the managers are going to be on the high end.

    • @peonyflowers23
      @peonyflowers23 4 месяца назад +9

      This always happens to me do because I’m a high performer. It’s a shame. Bullies peg you as a threat and start trouble and trauma.

    • @xinpeuru711
      @xinpeuru711 2 месяца назад +4

      I would say jealous. They are jealous to all that is better than themselves. I am experiencing this now and that's my answer, I am a high performer.

    • @michav.4663
      @michav.4663 28 дней назад

      ​@@rockhazeNo... high performers annoy lazy people.

  • @chroniclesofpickles
    @chroniclesofpickles Год назад +141

    I recently got fired from making a formal complaint to my bullying and despicable line manager. Remember guys, leave the place. No place deserves our value for dehumanizing us.

    • @skinnypopcorn22-md2dp
      @skinnypopcorn22-md2dp Год назад +5

      Amen. I’m glad that you left. Forgive doesn’t mean continuing to expose yourself to wicked behavior or acting like it didn’t happen.

    • @skinnypopcorn22-md2dp
      @skinnypopcorn22-md2dp 11 месяцев назад +3

      @@jeannemarie3704 so if you quit what happens to your pension also what about health insurance I hope I framed the question right. When I say YOUR pension I’m just asking in general.

    • @polishherowitoldpilecki5521
      @polishherowitoldpilecki5521 10 месяцев назад +2

      Currently going through something similar how did you handle the workplace gossip?

    • @skinnypopcorn22-md2dp
      @skinnypopcorn22-md2dp 10 месяцев назад +9

      2.26.24. Quick update. I QUIT one month ago I worked in that place over 20 years and I left (with notice) quietly. Mobbing at work and they were so “shocked” when I resigned Word spreads fast. They have to guess about my where about and where I’m going next. Moved in silence. I politely ignored the exit interview that they emailed to me.

    • @rockhaze
      @rockhaze 4 месяца назад +7

      @@skinnypopcorn22-md2dp You're smart for not revealing where you are going. Only to have them start making random phone calls or emails to your new office talking trash about you. Some employers are like that, they bully you, and then when you leave, they get upset that you left and are no longer their target of harassment, so they get back at you by, unfortunately, stalking you and trying any which way to derail you.

  • @kristiekogutrodriguez496
    @kristiekogutrodriguez496 Год назад +65

    So glad you mentioned bullying at the workplace is trauma

  • @lanaigirl
    @lanaigirl 7 месяцев назад +52

    I developed PTSD from a toxic work environment. Bullying is dangerous when companies continue to turn a blind eye. Companies should be held liable for turning a blind eye. Note, I was in a high level HR position and bullied by the boss. I was being forced to do things to employees that were not right. I fought for the employees but in return I was psychologically tormented by upper management and still suffer today.

  • @crystalline9098
    @crystalline9098 Год назад +296

    HR can be the victims’ enemy

    • @brookeslosson6495
      @brookeslosson6495 Год назад +40

      Correct when the bully is a favorite and plays them.

    • @laura1705111
      @laura1705111 Год назад +1

      Of course, HR is for management only it seems

    • @milenamehari2256
      @milenamehari2256 Год назад +30

      I am going through it for 2 years 😢😭😭😭 now HR is part of a bullying

    • @crystalline9098
      @crystalline9098 Год назад

      @@milenamehari2256 I've been there too. Fortunately/unfortunately I left in the middle of the "investigation" they started. The bullies I had knew how to play HR and then were falsely stating things about my behavior. I was told to escalate the issue within HR, therefore ask that whomever is the HR person handling your complaint get removed from your case and ask for someone higher in authority to take over. Before doing so, I would try to see the person higher up would be sympathetic to your case. I had someone else working at a different company do that, and the results were in her favor as the first person handling her complaint would dismiss every matter that was brought up. I also find, that HR may tell you that something isn't legitimately an issue when in reality it truly is a legal issue- HR will try to bluff/gaslight you. In the end, its really important to have a plan B and C and D... which is to leave.

    • @lilys7431
      @lilys7431 Год назад +30

      They hate to have their nail polishing time disrupted.

  • @beyondbrunch
    @beyondbrunch Год назад +65

    I had a coworker try to gaslight me and I pulled up receipts. I’m on guard going forward.

  • @shreyasingh3612
    @shreyasingh3612 19 дней назад +3

    Sometimes people bully you inorder to prove their position and due to their insecurities. They want to satisfy their egos.

  • @cheguevara5560
    @cheguevara5560 Год назад +60

    Number 4 .
    Stand up for your self !
    The question why we atracting this behaviour ....? They target the people who are not like them ,people who have integrity that is someting bullies do not have . I'm a target who fire back at them ,so what ever they throw at me will come back to them .
    People do not let assholes to destroy who you are . Called them out in the meeting front of other coworkers ,they are cowards allways operating in the group ,you need strong personality to deal with them .

    • @SiGa-i1r
      @SiGa-i1r 11 месяцев назад

      ​@jessicaj9743 My biss is manipulated by my evil managers against me. If he believes their lies, I can lose my job and die. When a Christian is slandered, they must expose the lies. You hurt only their egoes, not their bodies.

    • @cherrytraveller5915
      @cherrytraveller5915 9 месяцев назад +10

      This is easier said than done. Some bullies use the system against you under the guise of “productive management”. It can also happen over time with the pressure gradually getting worse.

    • @EileenMRyan
      @EileenMRyan 7 месяцев назад

      Agree it just worst until you break

    • @shellymarlenemartin2779
      @shellymarlenemartin2779 7 месяцев назад

      Yes. I just got a promotion as well as numerous new clients who insist that I work with them. I have a very nasty coworker who is basically impossible and always creates major drama at work. But usually when managers aren’t present. Her jealousy went through the roof. And since I have already experienced this persons crazy behavior in the past, I knew it wouldn’t be long before she acted out again.
      The day before her huge blowup, the manger actually pulled me aside and asked me if I’d ever had issues with her because other coworkers are complaining.
      I told him of a few very unpleasant incidents. He told me that he has been taking note.
      Then, today. She didn’t get something she wanted at work and she literally called me a retard. She also said that I don’t take accountability and that I’m very irresponsible in life.
      This was entirely crazy talk. (An attempt to undermine me and my position at work).
      Funny but I have my position due to my high level of responsible behavior as well as my professionalism at work.
      I did not apply for my position or ask for it. The manager confronted me and told me that they considered me to be the perfect person for the position beneath them and also for my general attitude at work.
      Anyway. I stood up to the crazy, nasty, super negative, name calling co-worker.
      Nobody likes her and everyone secretly wishes she’d quit but I hope she gets fired for how terribly she abuses others.
      If I called somebody a “retard” at work, I’m 100% certain that I’d be fired straight away. So hopefully the same will apply to her.
      I’m trying to build a tough shell so that I don’t get rattled by workplace assholes. I think I’m doing well but admittedly I hate shitheads. I’m absolutely unwilling to play games.

    • @bip-someandnone8698
      @bip-someandnone8698 6 месяцев назад +8

      You’re calling out people that don’t care and do not have a conscience. It’s like dealing with reprobates. Dealing with robots. Sometimes it’s not worth the “fight”. Each person’s case is different. Call them out in front of other coworkers? Suppose it’s mobbing by BOTH coworkers and bosses. What then?

  • @govandals1983
    @govandals1983 Месяц назад +7

    The thing about this is that you don’t wanna be overly happy and show grace with bully coworkers. I’ve tried this and it got me mostly being a target of emotional abuse because they saw me as weak. I kept silent when they speak up to me and it became easy for them.

    • @AerielFerguson
      @AerielFerguson Месяц назад

      So what do you say and still stay professional? I'd like to tell the fck off but I cant so I say nothing.

    • @amandadoh2875
      @amandadoh2875 Месяц назад

      Go above them and report it

    • @govandals1983
      @govandals1983 Месяц назад

      @@amandadoh2875I did on different occasions

  • @Krlowanigu-mg6eg
    @Krlowanigu-mg6eg 11 месяцев назад +65

    Dont go into it, just run if its serious. Do not deal with evil, dont escalate, no HR, no manager involved. They know! Find something, do not show or talk that you want to leave, dont give them time and just leave. Dont tell them the reason you quit and dont tell where you go. They can try to harm you even when you change company.

    • @xdproductions3087
      @xdproductions3087 6 месяцев назад +5

      I’d add to block anyone from that company on LinkedIn and other social media, in case you want to update your job status but are concerned they will find out where you went and try to contact your current employers. I have overheard managers speak of contacting ex-employees’ new jobs.

    • @rockhaze
      @rockhaze 4 месяца назад

      @@xdproductions3087 They can get sued for that if you can prove it. If you can, I wouldn't hold back, suck them for every penny like they sucked you.

    • @lovelymix8056
      @lovelymix8056 2 месяца назад +3

      @@xdproductions3087contacting their new job ?!!!! That’s sick!!

    • @phoenix5758
      @phoenix5758 Месяц назад

      ​@@xdproductions3087 wow.... people are evil af

  • @anastasiar9625
    @anastasiar9625 Месяц назад +3

    I started working at Eddie Bauer as Assistant Manager a month ago. I have never experienced such severe bullying, public humilation and emotional abuse at work. One of the Assistant Manager didn't like me from the first day I started work. Since then, he yelled at me in front of customers 4 times, and turned most of the assocites against me. I also witnessed him yelling at a customer, and was told by another assistant manager that he had treated other employees similarly.

  • @jenniferdavis2323
    @jenniferdavis2323 Год назад +193

    Unfortunately, my supervisor is part of the problem

    • @sethritchie4032
      @sethritchie4032 8 месяцев назад +12

      Stay strong.. I'm going thru the same shit, i ignored them and took the high road but now they just make up a whole ass life, when i do respond and confront; it's always "oh I was talking to so and so" and "oh no I didn't mean you" or just speaking in another language.. it's to the point where I started to second guess myself and think I was just being paranoid. I've worked there for almost 3 years in September and it's just been this year with the theatrics. Won't say it to my face or when I'm around them it's always behind my back. Now I would never resort to such tactics but I can totally see how a workplace 🔫 can occur or how someone could be driven to it.

    • @EricThompson-k9v
      @EricThompson-k9v 6 месяцев назад +6

      mine too. you are definitely not alone.

    • @CarolStanhope
      @CarolStanhope 6 месяцев назад

      Dark Triads gravitate towards management.🤨

    • @jenniferdavis2323
      @jenniferdavis2323 2 месяца назад

      @@sethritchie4032 I'm sorry you're going through this too and I hope things have gotten better for you.

    • @jenniferdavis2323
      @jenniferdavis2323 2 месяца назад

      @@EricThompson-k9v are things getting better now?

  • @thcodtarashealthcareconsul450
    @thcodtarashealthcareconsul450 Год назад +29

    This happened to me so many times and I was fired so many times due to bullies in the work place. Today, I have mastered thus since 2016 when God told me to study Narcissim. Then it explained covert, overt, and Gaslighting. I learned this like I was getting a degree in it. Now, I minister and help people about it. I just ministered to a lady about it while at a dental visit. EVERYTHING YOU SAID HERE MS. CLARKE (Dr. Clarke I prefer to call you) is just what I said to her. It is traumatic, awful social, emotional and mental abuse. It even happened to me before in church by a pastor. No one should ever go through this.
    You are a blessing. Now, I boldly confront and call you out and you to stay away from me, or I'll put that pen in your life called harassment. I'm subscribed and now your biggest fan.

  • @leelashbrooks8780
    @leelashbrooks8780 4 месяца назад +10

    HR will protect the bully, and railroad you,and if it’s a right to work state there’s nothing you can do. The best thing you can do is find somewhere else

  • @williamlevy6964
    @williamlevy6964 9 месяцев назад +10

    It is so refreshing to hear this. When I told my brother I was getting bullied he told me "I don't care" and assumed I was exaggerating. My mother was the same. Needless to say years later I treat them with open disrespect and dissent and I'm still awaiting the day they admit they were wrong. Family plays a massive role with bullying too. Doing nothing is just as bad as doing it yourself. I had no support from anyone in the world when it happened and basically received the message of go f*** yourself and "man up" from society as a collective. Message received. Now I am the cold hearted psychopath they always wanted but I'm not sure they're happy about it.

    • @cathytomlinson
      @cathytomlinson 8 месяцев назад +3

      I am experiencing the exact same scenario. Thanks for sharing. I don't feel so alone now.

    • @EmilyKnowlton-i4e
      @EmilyKnowlton-i4e 5 месяцев назад +3

      They will never admit they are wrong or apologize to you. It's ok to want that but at the same time it may serve you to accept the fact that it may never happen. I definitely understand your frustration.

    • @scoobysnax8127
      @scoobysnax8127 Месяц назад

      I totally get it.

  • @taha1127
    @taha1127 6 месяцев назад +34

    And they blame you for being the troublemaker if you decide to speak out and ask for help. I’ll just shut my mouth and not interact at all.

  • @Minervalady
    @Minervalady 9 месяцев назад +56

    My supervisor is totally toxic gossiping with my co workers all day she micromanaged me every day such an ugly environment thank God I found a better job 🙏🏼

    • @rockhaze
      @rockhaze 4 месяца назад +1

      I have this happening to me now. Guys in his 50s who's a service manager by the way... you'd think he's old enough to have gained some maturity. Nope. The guy is an overgrown frat boy, talks an insane amount of shit about employees, enough that would get him fired in any other workplace, but won't since he's best buds with the boss outside of work.

    • @farahmahar-g4m
      @farahmahar-g4m 2 месяца назад

      Emma

  • @MontanaKat1912
    @MontanaKat1912 5 месяцев назад +13

    I was bullied at my old job. I couldn't take it anymore. I tired with HR and manager. Sadly, the managers didn't help and thought I'm the problem. I'm hard worker, kind to everyone and the customers. I left and found a better job. It's weird when started a new job and everyone is so kind and they all talk to me.

    • @patriciasalem3606
      @patriciasalem3606 2 месяца назад +2

      You make a great point. Escalating often results in you being labeled the troublemaker. Often the bully has some sort of financial power over you.

    • @MontanaKat1912
      @MontanaKat1912 2 месяца назад +2

      @patriciasalem3606 This bully is like in her mid 60s. You think she knows better. It just felt like middle school drama.

  • @ladyred007
    @ladyred007 3 месяца назад +8

    Thank you. I had a screamer who was also a schemer. She was horrible. It became physical and derogatory words were used. Corporate did nothing and I filed an EEOC complaint and they fired me. Now we are in court waiting for the judge to decide if we can go to trial. Bullying causes trauma and I'm still dealing with the aftermath. You are correct that high performers and I wasn't the only one that suffered. Thank you for shedding light on this. I'm trying to share my story with others so it won't happen to them.

  • @BlearyBoy1
    @BlearyBoy1 8 месяцев назад +23

    HR is there to protect the management.

  • @theblondeone8426
    @theblondeone8426 10 месяцев назад +13

    im a nurse and Im being bullied by doctors and nurses in a clinic - if ur a nurse manager and nurses keep quiting you have a bullying problem. And there is almost nowhere to report it.

  • @alinecardoso9668
    @alinecardoso9668 8 месяцев назад +16

    I have a colleague that the others co-workers doesn't talk to her, they are doing the silent treatment, and because I treat her well, sometimes one of those colleagues mistreats me with bad comments, thankfully I go to the office only once a week, because If I had to go every day I wouldn't make it.

    • @JazzGaming26
      @JazzGaming26 8 месяцев назад +4

      If you live in a one party consent state purchase a small recording device and keep it in your pocket at work. Then it'll document the rude comments for you.

  • @shannonyoshikawa2494
    @shannonyoshikawa2494 Год назад +28

    I am engaged in suing the supervisor for this type of behavior.

    • @mariecampbell3373
      @mariecampbell3373 5 месяцев назад +7

      Go Shannon !!
      I'm not suing but I have reported to 3 different organizations. This is the most empowering thing I've done in my entire life.

  • @lashunnalove8336
    @lashunnalove8336 7 месяцев назад +15

    The bullies at my job are the ones that wouldn't no one else will hire!!

  • @angelacarbon4010
    @angelacarbon4010 Год назад +55

    If one confronts one's boss, who is the bully, they can fire you.

    • @OrkydOrygynalsTV
      @OrkydOrygynalsTV 11 месяцев назад +8

      And if you’re wrongfully let go and can prove it. You have a case. Find resources to see if you have a case so you can SUE!

    • @Stephanie-ku8wl
      @Stephanie-ku8wl 10 месяцев назад +12

      Document everything

    • @mariecampbell3373
      @mariecampbell3373 5 месяцев назад +4

      I'm waiting for this b$_&h to fire me. I look forward to it.
      I will collect unemployment like a champ 🏆

    • @angelacarbon4010
      @angelacarbon4010 5 месяцев назад

      ​@@mariecampbell3373Consider carefully, if this ends with you being fired, keep in mind, for every job interview thereafter, you must offer an explanation as to why you were fired.
      Also, ideally, one must try not to disparage one's former boss or workplace.

    • @commonsenseking6386
      @commonsenseking6386 3 месяца назад +2

      You also can sue them.

  • @ggmanj
    @ggmanj Год назад +18

    Know thyself... Stand up for your good contributions... Results will always silence the Bully💼

    • @cherrytraveller5915
      @cherrytraveller5915 9 месяцев назад +1

      Actually my bully used my contributions to attack me with them.

  • @cherrytraveller5915
    @cherrytraveller5915 9 месяцев назад +21

    My boss is bully who bullied an autistic girl so bad that she took her own life. Even worse the company covered it over and that woman is still there. She is now doing the same thing to others.

    • @iligalvan
      @iligalvan 5 месяцев назад +7

      Woooow thats terrible ):

    • @francesbernard2445
      @francesbernard2445 3 месяца назад

      My guess is that bullies like that are if they can overdiagnosing children with autism too if they have the credentials to do so.

    • @Angela-qc1ex
      @Angela-qc1ex 3 месяца назад

      I've learned that a huge majority of people who are work place bullies have ( a lot of personal issues ) inside of their household due to adult children / and they're bringing it to work and i hear it All the time​@@iligalvan

  • @aerozg
    @aerozg 6 месяцев назад +6

    "Shouldering the burden of proof, while having to keep up the work productivity." Great way to describe it. I have a senior developer who is bullying a group of us new hires. Corporate won't do anything because this guy has been here since forever and is a key person in most of the projects. I don't know what to do. My stomach hurts when i have to get up for work.

  • @novascotianinfj
    @novascotianinfj 7 месяцев назад +15

    They fire the victim- the other workers side with the bully to avoid being bullied (triangulation) so all the supervisor sees is you- the problem. Talk and you get fired.

    • @user-eu2me4bp7j
      @user-eu2me4bp7j 5 месяцев назад +2

      Yep. Best to leave

    • @EmilyKnowlton-i4e
      @EmilyKnowlton-i4e 5 месяцев назад +2

      You aren't wrong.

    • @dev_kuo190
      @dev_kuo190 2 месяца назад +2

      Instead of solving the problems, they 'solve' the person who detected the problems. 🤣

    • @QueenAlexis556
      @QueenAlexis556 4 дня назад +1

      Yes and the victim gets labeled a "troublemaker", while they pacify the bully. Sad

  • @di5833
    @di5833 4 месяца назад +3

    There are so many people at my job that are trying to hurt me and I don’t know why.

  • @TheRealMoonSage
    @TheRealMoonSage 10 месяцев назад +16

    Don't like #5. Like you said, high performers are more likely to attract bullies.

  • @drewbart1886
    @drewbart1886 6 месяцев назад +7

    Usually supervisors and HR are complicit with the worst of them. There’s only one cure to this sort of problem. It’s not in the employee handbook if you catch my drift

  • @bakangbalapile2653
    @bakangbalapile2653 11 месяцев назад +7

    I am a victim of a workplace bullying, I have given up just working for money but I don’t have inner peace. I doubt I will have motivation to work there

  • @chuckmaxon3727
    @chuckmaxon3727 6 месяцев назад +11

    Record every interaction with said bully on your smart phone. Play it for HR and tell them it must stop or there will be legal action.

    • @amandadoh2875
      @amandadoh2875 Месяц назад

      it's not illegal, thats the crappy part.

  • @michav.4663
    @michav.4663 28 дней назад +1

    I learned to reassess and redefine my boundaries with everyone at work. Keep things formal! I learned I was right to keep my thoughts and plans to myself. I'm planning to move along quietly on my timeline... no one else's.

  • @jennyandthemachines
    @jennyandthemachines 11 месяцев назад +8

    To summarise: ‘see the signs’, ‘talk to HR’, ‘get support’ and ‘look at yourself’. With the aim of helping others: I’ll post a better link below if I find anything helpful.

  • @BooBahh-uh5jk
    @BooBahh-uh5jk 5 месяцев назад +4

    Main reason why I quit without notice. I was smallest employee in warehouse both physically and weight wise and was harassed all day long for it

  • @LeahIsHereNow
    @LeahIsHereNow 10 дней назад +1

    I like that you ask the metaphysical question because that’s the place I’m at mentally right now. I’m trying to figure out why I keep attracting this kind of behavior because when I go into a new workplace situation, I’m very positive.
    But when I start seeing that things are being stacked against me (it truly seems like this happens before I have any negative thoughts about it, but this must be some kind of saved up energy I have from past experiences… This is why PTSD is such a bitch!) I spin out pretty quickly and try to figure out who to blame. I think it’s at that point that I become very suggestible and start scrutinizing people and ascribing certain behaviors to malice when they’re actually probably just due to ignorance or something else fairly innocuous.
    Anyway, I’m very eager to break the cycle because I’m going to be at the place. I’m working right now for a very long time, whether they like it or not. The crazy thing is I know I’m extremely good at my job and I make the lives of those who I’m helping much better but they don’t seem to really want to support me that much. That’s cool. I’ll get there on my own.

  • @rinehardt6837
    @rinehardt6837 Год назад +22

    I was a victim of workplace bullying about a year and a half ago. And I got to be honest I think that the people in charge didn't take it seriously because I'm male and the person who is doing the bullying was female but that shouldn't matter. Eventually the person was talk to they were disciplined but ultimately they left the company of their own accord. I wasn't the only one sometimes it was very indiscriminate who she would go after I saw her bring one young lady to tears over nothing. she would always blame her outburst on having bipolar disorder which I can sympathize for anybody who has that but the people around you don't want to be yelled at and berated every day regardless of what the reason is. Anyway your video was great thank you so much😊

    • @rinehardt6837
      @rinehardt6837 Год назад +1

      @jessicaj9743 hey thanks for your words of encouragement and thanks for replying

    • @MayaNicoleN
      @MayaNicoleN Год назад +1

      I could have even wrote this, identical situation and feelings

    • @youtubingbabs
      @youtubingbabs 5 месяцев назад +1

      It matters. Gender dynamics are changing in the world and part of that could mean females targeting males. Just as unacceptable as vice versa! From a female anti-bullying friend!

  • @tiffanybyars3939
    @tiffanybyars3939 Год назад +15

    I work in a hostile environment. It was already hostile before I took the position.
    Besides resigning. What do I do?

    • @naimaali5308
      @naimaali5308 Год назад +12

      Your mental well being is far more important than fighting something that’s not worth fighting for, find another job quietly

    • @Theowlhawk
      @Theowlhawk Год назад +20

      Its not always that easy get another job.
      Been in 5 toxic bully jobs

    • @sheabutta5425
      @sheabutta5425 Год назад +5

      I've started researching employment lawyers.

    • @subrennaevans6504
      @subrennaevans6504 Год назад +4

      I was watching a short video of what a lawyer said and one of the first things he said was, "DO NOT QUIT YOUR JOB" and he gave his reasons why. I'm being harrased/bullied at my job and that was the first thing I thought about is to quit. 😕😕

    • @skinnypopcorn22-md2dp
      @skinnypopcorn22-md2dp 11 месяцев назад +9

      @@Theowlhawk. Most of those jobs have a 100% tolerance for bullying. “They” LOVE it.

  • @MarkCinque-uq9kh
    @MarkCinque-uq9kh 4 месяца назад +4

    Thank you so much for that message i will take your advice and yes i am also dealing with a workplace Bully and He is Very Mean!,Curses,and talks very mean and nasty and hollers very Loud! out of Angry and i have been ignoring him and that has not helped he needs to be Gone! and to Never be allowed back ever again.

  • @nicolealce9670
    @nicolealce9670 Год назад +24

    Thanks some much for this. I went through something like this about a year ago with a former manager. Needless to say I took action and after she realized that they were on to her, she resigned.

  • @Understatedalways
    @Understatedalways 11 месяцев назад +10

    I made a mistake at work which I have since rectified. I owned up to it. A coworker humiliated me in front of everyone by calling me an underminer. I am so mad now. I want to quit not just the job, but my field.

    • @EmilyKnowlton-i4e
      @EmilyKnowlton-i4e 5 месяцев назад +5

      You should be proud of yourself for admitting your mistake. Very few people do that. You are rare. I admire your actions. The person who undermined you is weak. You need to follow your intuition and your future is up to you. ❤

  • @manumusa9224
    @manumusa9224 Год назад +17

    Bullying in all forms. At work and school need to be illegal.

  • @bluemoom
    @bluemoom Месяц назад +2

    I have a schemer at work…. I’m so tired of it

  • @thegabbiedoll
    @thegabbiedoll Год назад +6

    I’m currently dealing with bullying and harassment by a female co worker. It’s gotten to the point where she’s threatening to kill me and has tried to run me over with her car. I’ve gone to my management twice about her behavior but all the did was write her up.

    • @Mrs.TJ516
      @Mrs.TJ516 10 месяцев назад +8

      You need to report that to police then.

    • @Jules-zg1ip
      @Jules-zg1ip 9 месяцев назад +8

      Yes, report to the police and make a plan to leave ASAP. Unless you have signed up to be put in harm's way, no civilian job is worth that kind of threat. The company and management are responsible for keeping thier employees safe at work, rather than kicking a very dangerous can down the road. There is no excuse whatsoever for them to tolerate an employee that makes serious threats.

  • @missuniverse8931
    @missuniverse8931 11 месяцев назад +8

    I have a manager like this. I am performing very well. This is toxic behavior.

  • @JM-kd1mr
    @JM-kd1mr 10 месяцев назад +27

    HR is looking out for the company NOT you. If you go to HR, you will probably get fired next.

    • @Jules-zg1ip
      @Jules-zg1ip 9 месяцев назад +7

      This is absolutely true! HR is not your friend and they will not represent an employee under duress. Best to make an escape plan and leave.

    • @agirlfrommars3441
      @agirlfrommars3441 3 месяца назад +2

      I went to HR they effectively relocated me. (I blew the whistle for Sexual harassment) about 5 months later when another woman was hired (this was an all male team other than me) he was fired. I wonder why 🤔

    • @FeliciaStands
      @FeliciaStands 2 месяца назад +1

      Unless your education in EOE and retaliatory action people are too
      Afraid to stand up allowing this to continue smdh bad advice

    • @lovelymix8056
      @lovelymix8056 2 месяца назад

      @@FeliciaStandsI agree ! I’m going through it my manger who’s trying to start drama over an employee that doesn’t even work here anymore.

  • @LifeStyle2014
    @LifeStyle2014 16 дней назад

    Your way of speaking is so powerful, it's comforting giving me strength and hope, it's firm passing me credibility, it's empathetic making me feel included without judgement, and it's very professional make me think about my own actions towards my situation. I wish I could express myself like you.

  • @sakshichoudhary7039
    @sakshichoudhary7039 4 месяца назад +4

    Hello i have no one who will currently understand me hence im writing here. I always tried to put all my efforts in work and also was doing great but i was never acknowledged, now im being targeted by two powerfull people. One who has grudge on me and the other one is friend of the first. They team up to prove me wrong even if im right. My friends chicken out instead of helping me and my boss is blamming me for overthinking and asking me to shut up. The job is important for me because I have family responsibilities. I dont know what to do please someone suggest atleast be someone to understand me.

    • @xinpeuru711
      @xinpeuru711 2 месяца назад

      Hard situation. Try to relax, and find the help from some free lawyers who work on this.

  • @tomhamilton5261
    @tomhamilton5261 11 месяцев назад +7

    Very eloquent lady. Excellent advice.

  • @l.5832
    @l.5832 5 месяцев назад +3

    I was top sales in my last 2 jobs and was bullied out of both. One was a unionized environment and they did nothing to help me.
    I got another job that is not directly in sales, but of course my performance is still measured. Because I am close to retirement age and want this job to supplement my pension, I am coasting. I turned down advancement. I am not going to. threaten the insecure people. If I were younger, I obviously would want to be more competitive but at this stage it's in my own best interest to not be a top performer.

  • @jaishrees9442
    @jaishrees9442 6 месяцев назад +10

    Yes, these bulliies are really evil and manipulative.

  • @__berichh5375
    @__berichh5375 2 месяца назад +2

    Happened to me pretty quickly in less than 100 days. My boss and coworker teamed up to ruin me. Haha. But I got out. So ridiculous

  • @maybritt6457
    @maybritt6457 9 месяцев назад +9

    dang, even remote work doesn't protect against bullying.

  • @CC-kt1up
    @CC-kt1up Год назад +5

    Hi. I am still on my first month probationary period and I felt that I am being bullied by my direct supervisor. On my first day she told me that I am not the first choice for the position and keep on reminding me to master everything to show them I deserve to be offered the job. I tried my best. But every time I made mistakes she will close the door and bombarded me with harsh words like ‘you’re too slow’ I don’t know why the hr pick you or if I ask again she will say ‘ I already told you this. ‘ I am not allowed to ask a colleague. If she heard me asking, she will email
    Me saying do not ask them. In a month I developed anxiety fear and self doubt. I am not sure if I will survive 3 months.

    • @CC-kt1up
      @CC-kt1up Год назад

      @jessicaj9743 thank you so much for this. I will be turning 2 months in 2 weeks. And that is totally what I did. I offered everything to Him. I offered all my fears, anxiety and self doubt in my prayers. I still hear harsh words but I gain support from my colleagues. Still a long way to go but I am just staying away from any workplace dramas but trying to do good in my task hoping she will change. 💗🙏

  • @wmel0615
    @wmel0615 7 месяцев назад +4

    One of the managers at my job picks on me often. It’s wild, but not surprising because I’m a down to earth person who’s there to work! The other day just for example, she was being messy & said, “Melissa I’m sad you won’t miss me! I heard you text everyone that it was good to work with them & I want that text too.” Which I didn’t; My coworkers got quiet, but their faces said it all. They knew this wasn’t true!! Joke’s on her because I’m not the only one who isn’t fond of her 🤷🏽‍♀️

    • @QueenAlexis556
      @QueenAlexis556 4 дня назад +1

      Omg!! And they never get reprimanded for their abusive behavior. 3 different jobs, 3 managers I reported to upper management and the only thing they did was have a one on one with the bully, which helped for about a week or two, then the bully went right back to their verbal abuse. My last job, I was bullied relentlessly by my immediate supervisor. I didn't fight back, didn't report. I just decided to not go back. When I got a call from HR asking why I quit, I told them I was done taking her verbal abuse. My gut told me months ago that she would pull a sabotage act on me to force me to quit. Sometimes it's best to just look for other employment

  • @richardpeel6056
    @richardpeel6056 Год назад +7

    My supervisor gave me orders in the form of a single syllable shouted grunt. I'm British, he's Indian of a high Hindu caste, I am deaf in one ear but can cope if you speak clearly and don't shout. The grunt would yield no data, based on the context I would run through the menu of possible options while he lost his temper. I'd eventually find out what he wanted.
    Training to operate a printer consisted of being shouted at for 10 minutes and having to sign a piece of paper. I identified a few words, but no phrases or sentences, I learned nothing.
    In the eyes of this high caste Hindu I was sub human and was treated as such, I eventually just gave up and retired.

  • @TheBeachkitten
    @TheBeachkitten 4 месяца назад +1

    My current “ retirement part time job” makes me happy, fun, not to physically hard, extra cash. The boss who is going no where career wise made the mistake a screaming at me in front of the customers. Believe me this will only happen once. I tore him up. Now he instigated trouble through other employees. When they come to me with his demands I tell them he has to speak with me himself so I am clear with “what” he wants done. The dear boy has really opened a can of worms. Been there, done that, seen it all and have firm “respect” boundaries.

  • @OK-wb1dy
    @OK-wb1dy 3 месяца назад +1

    “… performance rating and compensation didn’t seem to align with my achievements and contributions…”

  • @YuzieMadison
    @YuzieMadison 2 месяца назад +1

    Underrated channel , Im so happy I found you

  • @kieuhoanhtran546
    @kieuhoanhtran546 9 месяцев назад

    Thank you so much for the helpful video and pointing out tips on how to stand up for yourself at work.

  • @Let_meowt
    @Let_meowt 8 месяцев назад +7

    What if HR is the bully?

    • @chainz7006
      @chainz7006 6 месяцев назад +1

      theres nothing u can do about that

    • @aoikanzaki6578
      @aoikanzaki6578 4 месяца назад +1

      after years of staying in the company, slap the resignation letter and leave that's it

    • @peonyflowers23
      @peonyflowers23 4 месяца назад +1

      Leave the org. They’ll get sued eventually. Also sometimes karma kicks in visibly and bullies kick the bucket. I’ve seen this happen twice.

  • @onceuponatime800
    @onceuponatime800 День назад

    I dealt with someone like this at work. I lost my job as a result and have lost over $2.5 million in salary past 10 years. I became a hermit and stopped working stay inside, afraid to deal with people and getting older because time flies by .... I've been so traumatized because after I lost my soulmate, I took 2 years off work. After the 2 year grieving period, I returned to work only to be gaslighted by someone with an entry level job who plays politics and targeted me seeing how sad I was .... I never did anything to this person other than ignoring them because they were immature and we did not work on the same project...

  • @autumnjohnson6280
    @autumnjohnson6280 8 дней назад

    I have been getting bullied by this coworker for a year now, I have written everything down, other coworkers have witnessed them trying to damage my things, and they have sabotaged my work. I have gone to management plus HR and they will not do anything even when I have witnesses and documents. I’m at the point where I don’t know what to do!

  • @sharonhainesNumber1Red
    @sharonhainesNumber1Red Год назад +4

    35 years ago my Manager was a screamer, at James Avery Craftsman. I discovered that James Avery himself was also a screamer. I Reported my Manager, on a questionnaire about my job performance. Reporting her only got me in trouble with my Manager. The Company did not care.

  • @lachlanhenry486
    @lachlanhenry486 Год назад +2

    I deal with this at my apartment. Working from home and neighbors on power dynamic struggles has severely hampered my productivity and personal safety. Good advice. It takes time and really sucks.

  • @sandhiyad194
    @sandhiyad194 5 месяцев назад +1

    I've been cyberbullied in my workplace and I feel my looks attracted the bully in the first place, I did leave the place for good but how can I alter my face that attracted that bully
    I understand I can't wait for the bully to change
    Being a man of power, that person still gets people paid to cyberbully me
    How can I even get through this

  • @samudin5033
    @samudin5033 11 месяцев назад +2

    Bullying in HMRC
    My daughter had a campaign of nearly 18 months of bullying. When she spoke out was moved but she was not in the click.
    Eventually on Tuesday they got her to the point she wanted to commit suicide.
    One person in a high position was able to get her to breaking point.
    Worst thing you can do is believe you will be protected if you speak out.
    But life is sweet, 6 years isn't 7, I will wait because I still work there, I think I will be the next but I am not a young person I have come across these people before

  • @swagatachatterjee8180
    @swagatachatterjee8180 4 месяца назад +2

    If workplace bully is very influential what can we do?

  • @mariecampbell3373
    @mariecampbell3373 5 месяцев назад +3

    That last point she made was priceless. All my jobs, I have had women f--k with me.
    And I feel as if I am cursed.

  • @deannaa.491
    @deannaa.491 10 месяцев назад +4

    I’m currently being bullyied by a coworker and the hr manager

  • @queenqueen977
    @queenqueen977 8 месяцев назад +1

    THANK YOU for acknowleding the metaphysical realm!

  • @jb22885
    @jb22885 7 месяцев назад +2

    I'm watching this now because I feel uncomfortable and worried what's going to happen with coworkers who have been bullying/disrespect another coworker who was transferred to another workplace,because of this feeling I had to speak with union representative my job HR and their attorney when they ask me about the person being bully,I feel like a snitch by saying yes these people did bully him but I didn't mention how they disrespect me because I usually ignore people like that...yeah right what I'm going through is a bit stressful.

  • @afallin
    @afallin 3 месяца назад

    Got something like this going on.
    A colleague who is like a cancer, spreading its venom...
    New people appear and after few weeks already show bizarre behaviour, after starting to spend time with that person.
    Feel good because that person makes them feel welcome in the gang and makes them feel important.
    After some few days already think they are more important than the ones who were there before them.

  • @writeousrhema
    @writeousrhema 11 месяцев назад +5

    Beautiful clear voice. Sounds like a podcast!

  • @callalys
    @callalys Год назад +3

    Thanks. that was helpful. Need an advice: my colleagues complained to the boss and portrayed me in a bad light. How do I behave now? I currently have a stomach ache and would prefer not to go to work at all. However, the boss said that if I don't work on myself and implement the demands of my colleagues, I can change my direction! They haven't even been honest about their own paleness and aren't helping me even though they should!

  • @leeandreabow4401
    @leeandreabow4401 19 дней назад

    I am dealing with this at my job as well. Im overwhelmed 😔 and ready to walk out. I have not said anything on social media about this until now. My boss is bullying the hell out of me. befriend the assistant. I work where I live so I have to do a whole 360 and move around and just to get away from this in order to find a new job. I would go above his head and say something and I've been recording writing down all the issues that's been going on. But I feel like if I was to go above his head I don't feel they would do much and I feel that he would retaliate

  • @babyadams
    @babyadams Год назад +3

    Thanks Ginny. I’m going to look at the resources you recommended.

  • @Wesenskern
    @Wesenskern Год назад +3

    Just saying that for kids suffering from playground/school bullies, it's just as real 😢

    • @Wesenskern
      @Wesenskern Год назад

      ​@EYRM9 I have a different believe system, thanks for sharing though. My child is doing better these days.

  • @jessgaff8565
    @jessgaff8565 2 дня назад

    I reported to HR - instead they got involved in workplace bullying and served me with charges with no investigation at all.

  • @shreyasingh3612
    @shreyasingh3612 19 дней назад

    Love the question at the end

  • @t.l.7733
    @t.l.7733 Год назад +4

    Zero respect for HR. They turned their heads & never investigated. They did, however, tell the abuser everytime an employee used the confidential hotline.
    Record them & only take your grievance to an outside agency. I was held hostage, threatened in a 4am mtg. to sign a release form to take me to a mental facility w/my GM telling me he's a doctor & my mgr. grabbing my arm to get me to sign. This was part of his smear campaign of telling the employees that I was suicidal & to stay away.

    • @jeannemarie3704
      @jeannemarie3704 11 месяцев назад

      Omg!!! 😮😮 what?? Oh I hope you just ran out and quit. That is so terrible..

  • @StacyK0731
    @StacyK0731 4 дня назад

    Please help, it isn't me that is being bullied but a co-worker...I've been there, I know how it feels, I can see myself in her...she is elderly and so sweet, but doesn't know how to handle this situation. I have witnessed this for almost 3 years now, it's been very hard to stand by and do nothing and witness this outrageous behavior. I have gone to my comptroller, and she will speak with the office mgr and things change for a day or two but that's it. This week she left work and was taken to the emergency room due to stress at work from this one manager who is a Screamer, and a bully. I can't stand by and do nothing anymore. How to proceed? She is timid, she had never been thru this before....my heart is breaking for her...please advise.

  • @nicoles.5296
    @nicoles.5296 2 месяца назад

    Thanks a lot for the reading Kathy 😇🙏

  • @amandadoh2875
    @amandadoh2875 Месяц назад +1

    Bully's target people they envy, not victims. It's jealousy.

  • @sweetpea17
    @sweetpea17 14 дней назад

    I have and another female coworker get bullied and undermined by this coworker but our manager a woman doesn't want to deal with it. Doesn't matter he has aggressive anger issues, screamers at customers a out us and lies about our performance. It's nutz.

  • @cheecheetara
    @cheecheetara Месяц назад

    I’m so scared to talk to HR. I already sent the email, to far to go back. Now I’m VERY worried because I missed the appointment they made (because I was working a 12 hour shift)

  • @263Racer
    @263Racer 17 дней назад

    Hi I've had a certain situation with a individual in work same age and level of employment as me and they decided to run up behind me and put me in a choke hold I couldn't outrun him so I just sat down and took it then tried grabbing them while they where behind me but I've had other issues with this certain individual and another one who kicks my heels out from underneath me often I had told me boss and foreman about but wasn't able to get my side out as they where discussing about the first bit .now I'm afraid of what's going to happen as it was a big serious warning to them both I'm not looking forward to the next couple of weeks.
    Any advice to deal with this would be much appreciated 😮‍💨

  • @michellepierre3001
    @michellepierre3001 Год назад +2

    Where can I get the article? Currently going through this and I have to leave my career behind because of it

  • @rednecktrailridders6562
    @rednecktrailridders6562 7 дней назад

    But what can you do when HR refuses to deal with this type of behavior?

  • @erikmullins5096
    @erikmullins5096 10 месяцев назад

    I got an entire company harassing
    and bullying me. Its a small town and the owner is a powerful politician. I believe she is giving orders. But they always trying to say things are missing. They act like im a puece of crap. I think they broke my car so i would break down. Its getting bad they follow me. They got my neighbors spying on me. I don't know what to do.

  • @BooBahh-uh5jk
    @BooBahh-uh5jk 5 месяцев назад

    My lead gets upset with me and my coworker yet yells all night long how he needs our help. But is BFF with other co workers from other departments

  • @michaelgwest3752
    @michaelgwest3752 6 месяцев назад

    powerful. Thank you.

  • @harpreetkaur-gy6qw
    @harpreetkaur-gy6qw Месяц назад

    I amnurse have one Psw is bully but PSW working there more than years.😢 m so stressed most of days because of that PSW. I was ignoring the behaviour and excusing because Mostly do not have time as my job work load is enough but no more m so done too much subordination. I dnt like to put people in trouble as we all work for our loved ones to have a good life and nothing personal but some people forgot to maintain professional boundries. My mistake was to ignore when it starts and mind own bussiness 😓 . Either Have to quit and look for other work place or Stand up for self.

  • @KoonnieKale
    @KoonnieKale 3 месяца назад

    I’m afraid to escalate as it’d be backfiring me - is it possible to escalate over the direct report? I don’t see the way