Commissar Convincing Ogryn to Get in the Transport
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- Опубликовано: 13 окт 2024
- Ogg the Ogryn Playlist: • Ogg the Ogryn
One of the sweeter things I've written for 40k
The Emperor is big and strong
He protects us humans all day long
He slays the chaos and xenos foe
So we may expand and always grow
He rules above, with us beneath
So follow orders and brush your teeth
The Emperor wants what’s best for you
So eat your rations and grow strong, it’s true!
1, 2, 1, 2! A marching tune! We go to face the foe!
We give them shells and las gun rounds and send them running too and fro!
The Emperor always guides us, he wants us too attack
For just as he protects us all, we must protect him back!
-Prayer #744 from the "Children's Catechism of Compliance"
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What I love about this is that there's a tinge of sadness to this.
Right? The poor guys are being manipulated and used and yet they honest-to-Emperor love serving the Imperium so much that some of them, in spite of limited intelligence, can recite a prayer they were taught, possibly as children (unless I'm mistaken about that last bit) and actually gain enough bravery to conquer their fears from just speaking aloud said prayer. That's a strength that, in any almost any universe but 40K, would be seen as a virtue, something to be proud of and respected, but to the Comissars of 40K's Imperium, it's just another tool for obedience and war-time strategy, rewarded with ab-human status that just barely entitles them to not be killed on-sight.
The fact that probably both of them died probably fighting together makes me sad
Oh hey StringStorm.
@Eric Nunya More like a child. And that's why I think it's tinged with sadness.
@WungusBill ONLY TING TO BE SAD ABOUT IZ DAT DERE IZ NOT ENUFF DAKKA!!!!
"He rules above with us beneath, so follow orders and brush your teeth." Brilliant
Cavities and gingivitis are signs of nurgle heresy!
Therefore, not brushing your teeth is *HERESY!*
@@MrJustonemorevoice Sooo the Inquisition is now a proponent of dental hygiene…
@@mq5731 the God Emperor endorses Crest
All teeth are the emperors teeth goddamn it, keep his equipment in good condition, its just another tool to defeat the emperors enemies.
Crest and the emperor protects
That Og is a freaking genius. He remembered the whole prayer! That is Star of Terra material right there!
not gonna lie, I cannot stop laughing.
I have a really wholesome image of a Commissiar cutting out a little golden star from a chocolate bar wrapper and sticking it to the Ogryn's chest, just for being a clever boy and remembering all those big words.
Make this ogryn a bone head!
If he can distinguish from left and right definitely
By the emperor, he actually made a video about this!
I like the emperial guard. The commisar asked what my duty was, I answered to do whatever I'm told to. The commisar called me a damn genius and gave me another medal. I likes the emperial guard
My name is gump, Forest Gump
Gumpius*
@@randomguy-xp7se Life is like a box of Corpse Starch, ya never know who you might get.
@@Mr.Monacle he may not be a smart man. But he know what fear is.
First battle uh
Ogryn: "does duh emperor like dah rabbits commisar?"
Commisar: " *sighs* of course, the emperor loves all the rabbits now get in the transport."
Thats from a movie right ? Mice and Men ? fucking sad movie man
It’s a book. They made it a film but it started as a book. And yes it is just as depressed by. RIP Lenny
Shouldn’t have killed that woman and puppy then should he
1000th like... man your comment is as good as my ocd
@@James-sk4db He fucked up, it was bad...but it's cruel and misses the point of the story to be too harsh in judgment.
You know discipline doesn’t always have to be brutal
To fair fair if a Commissar tried to BLAM an Ogryn there's a decent change the Og would survive and start punching.....
That to
To be fair, in the Black Library it's generally only the incompetent commissars who resort to blamming outside of extreme circumstances. Turns out that actually motivating your soldiers works better than trying to keep them in line through fear.
@@vladtairov2721 This, a hundred times this. I have always loved Ciaphas Cain's take on the world of 40k more. That Commissar's are scary yes, but at the same time heroes who inspire. The constant misery and 'That's a blamming' is just, just so crushing that it feels like everything should have fallen to Nurgle by now. Without light there is no darkness.
I've started a new regiment. "The Charonian 22nd 'Good Boys' Auxilia Regiment. Its largely an Ogryn force with the rest of the army as support staff. I've made green stuff teddies and balls they hang from their belts, if an ogryn is a true good boy their commissar lets them take their toys into battle.
I remember in one of the early IG army books one of the side panel stories about that one IG commander that has an ogryn bodyguard. Their transport has been hit, the commander is in a ditch bleeding out. He sees his ogryn bodyguard come shambling up looking concerned.
"Get me the med kit from the transport."
"Okay." the ogryn grunts and shambles off.
The commander is fading in and out of consciousness then gets jarred awake when he hears a terrible screeching sound. He raises his head to look around and sees the transport sliding towards him. The ogryn comes out from the other side.
"I said bring me the med kit."
"It's in the transport. It's stuck."
The commander just sighs. "Good job. Bring me to the medkit. Carefully."
The sidebars in the old army lists were priceless. They were full of little tidbits like this.
"Ugg, why did you drag the APC all the way over here?"
"Sah, da med kit is in da APC. You wanted me to bring da med kit."
"Ugg.... Never mind, go get the medkit for me."
Uhm, Sah? Can i get one of da Ration packs from the box in the APC?"
"Yes, Ugg. Of course you can get a Ration pack. after you bring me the Med kit."
"Yus, Sah! Fet... Fets.... I'll go get da Med kit, Sah." After giving a salute with the wrong hand, then the right hand and finally both hands, Ugg went rummaging through the APC.
@@janhammekenbuch142 Yeah, that's it.
Isnt that Nork Deddog? Widely considers the most intelligent Ogryn in history.
@@Nogu3 Yeah, that's the guy.
Commisar: "we can buy nuggets on the way back"
ogryn: "Yeah!"
Ogryn: "I likes de chicked ratons suh, I likes dem vurry muc!"
They’d probably be made of people knowing warhammer 40k
Corpse nuggets I assume.
Ogryn: Mista Big hat man, can a get the toy?
Commissar: yes *Hands the ogryn a box with granades written on the side"
Ogryn *happy ogryn noises, proceeds to throw the box at the head of the nearest heretic*
@@Hugealligator254 nuggys are nuggys to an ogryn. They care not for where the nuggys come
Oh my God that was an adorable prayer to the emperor!
Ogryns are the best!
@@noman8412 Did you write this prayer your self?
@@Turnil321 Yep. That's a Noman original.
@@noman8412 my question is are they really that stupid or?
I probably made Ogg smarter than an average ogryn.
I imagine this guy needs to read that prayer atleast 200 times a day
He has it down to memory. Probably says it in his sleep.
Read?! That’d be a whole new step in Ogryn intellect!
@@tychoMX pretty sure the smartest cannonical ogryn can spell his name which is 4 letters long
@@ehansultan damn that's actually extremely smart for an ogryn
One thing I think we all tend to forget is that being in such a high command position not only requires fire and fury, but a fair measure of patience as well.
That one part of the prayer "and brush our teeth" had me laughing. I could never imagine a Commissar saying or doing that. That's a pretty cute short story.
I have to imagine that the commissar and officers get sick of their breath, so they just made them start brushing their teeth to make their days that much more tolerable.
Proper dental health keeps Nurgle away!
Ogryns are actually more fond of commisars than regular guardsmen as they genuinely believe they are the voice of the Emperor himself so are less likely to want to cause an "accident".
This does however mean they a vunerable to corruption if said commisar falls to chaos as they will still follow thier orders without question.
I imagine most "dad vibe" commissars get put on charge of ogryns as they are basically super charged, valuable, dumb toddlers who can rip an Astartes head off
You might laugh, but in-universe the Astra Militarum takes hygiene pretty seriously because of Nurgle corruption and because they are used to losing men in combat, but losing them to disease is something else. Chapter 3 ("Imperial Guard Organisation, Structure and Basic Battlefield Policy"), Section 18 of *"The Imperial Infantryman's Uplifting Primer"* details, quite extensively, hygiene and cleanliness that is expected to be upheld in a Guard unit.
40k: if you look for light you can often find it, but if you focus on the dark it is all you'll ever see
It's why I read Ciaphus Cain
It's a lovely blend of both
Good luck finding genuine light in 40k, though.
@@Tacoguy1000 Nothing is brighter than Jurgen's Melta blast.
Agreed.
Land Raider machine spirits are a great example of this.
If you look for the grimdark/derp, all you'll see is a tank that gets temperamental and uppity when you need it most.
If you look for a bit of light, you see a rough equivalent to the company dog. Beloved by all, loyal and friendly, and must be held back from hurling itself in front of the marines it ferries to protect them.
It's not just a tank with obedience problems, it's a friend and comrade trapped in a tank's body.
@@aprinnyonbreak1290 I also like how mechanics ships are like, "Ugh fine I'll do something cool automatically and reveal systems you've never seen before for five minutes."
That was absolutely adorable. While I don't expect to see videos like this very often, I think that the occasional wholesome 40K video like this would be a nice treat every now and then.
I have a pretty good mix of videos. Some are serious, some are funny, and some are wholesome.
You cannot see the grimdark without the light
r/wholesome40k.
@@akrinornoname2769 We are talking Lasguns here, aren't we?
I wouldnt call convincing a mentally disabled supersoldier to go to war wholesome exactly...
A Commissar's job is not to 'blam' their troops. excessive blamming leads to low morale. Low morale leads to defeat. defeat leads to chaos and ruin. It is the Commissars SOLE duty to instill the highest discipline, morale, and loyalty in the troops under his command. SOMETIMES this requires blamming a cowardly guardsman, or a troublemaker sowing dissent in the ranks, and sometimes it means comforting the giant bulletproof tank-on-two-legs enough to get him in the transport.
A lot of people play them off as amoral sociopaths with little care for their men's lives. But in the entire vast network of the Imperial Guard, the Commissar cares the most. They are always in the thick of an attack. Always leading.
I'd imagine the blamming is mostly for those picturesque scenes where it's all gone to hell and the Commissar needs an adrenaline shot of fear or something to reinforce his command. Mostly when they're put up against like Nurgle's boiling cauldrons of pus and genetic viruses burning everything, a load of demons appear from the sky and start doing demon things, Slannesh deamonettes try to walk up to a load of soldiers, hypnotic aliens trying to get closer or when they are suffering catastrophic losses. It's one of those things they pull out to "hold the line" and on a primal level shunt the guardsmen back into reality that there's no retreat and survival in those situations is impossible, so keep fighting. The trigger happy ones abuse their power and thus find their way being killed by "Ork snipers" or "fell in a ditch of quicksand" but in that sense it can be a good thing because that shitty Commissar was slowly turning his own against him rather than using execution as a last resort to jolt his men. Also it would desensitize them against their own side more than anything, which is something you don't want to see ever given Chaos is a thing.
In a way, if a Commissar needs to execute a cowardly guardsman, he has already failed in his duty. A Commissar needs to be a paragon for his men, and a terror to his foes. But if absolutely necessary, when the only thing standing between victory and a horrifying defeat is that the Guard need to hold the line and someone is about to flee, then the Commissar should take the shot. For fear is as lethal as a bolt round on the battlefield.
Ibram Gaunt
@@TheKnightOfSmite and also dont forget that the trigger happy Commissar sometimes got a "grenade" in their fox holes
@@jeffthemercenary Yup. To paraphrase Commissar Cain, "in the middle of a firefight, when anything could happen, it is better for your men to have your back than be aiming at it."
The ogryn as children is so adorable. Reminds me of Lenny in Of Mice And Men.
2k likes for me remembering a book existed? Damn.
Remember the animals lenny
You'll get to feed the alfafa to the rabbits
@@alejandroramirez1043 ..and live off da fatta da land!
man, thinking of the final scene of " Of Mice and Men" as between an Ogryn and a Commisar gives it a different context lmao.
@@amoralsupport672 In the 40k universe, it probably happened at some point or another.
And the ogryn seem so simple but are literally the soul of the imperium too strong to be abused by the grim dark instead the ogryn unknowingly preserves something in the imperium and that thing is kindness from catachan to terra everyone loves ogryn they are the imperial guard’s big brothers and the little brothers of space marines
dude, they are literally mutants, just as astartes (who are sometimes deemed as mutants by eclesiarchy), who will refuse to serve with them becouse they are unholy. You dont get that part of wh40k that everyone are a bunch of liers and hipocrites, but in the end of the day - they have to, becouse survival of Imperium of men just requires it?
@@mariuszsobolewski9839 today everyone is a bunchnpf liars and hypocrits
@@mariuszsobolewski9839 In 40k, just as in real life, there are assholes. And those who hate these lovable lunks are assholes. There are plenty of people in lore who either tolerate Ogryns or get along fabulously with them. Some Abhumans tend to get treated better than others because they are close to baseline Humanity. This is one of the few areas of the Imperium that improved over the millennia. During the Great Crusade, Ogryns were subjected to horrific surgeries and chemical enhancements to turn them into insane, living weapons for the Solar Auxilia. They were expendable, armored bezerkers fitted with control devices and kept in stasis until needed. In comparison, the "modern" Imperium is rather benign and humane toward the Ogryns.
@@AtomicFire1972 i guess that's like Neanderthals becoming extinct millennia before, so in time i guess the imperium learned from before ancient times and so the way of life has improved for humanity.
@@mariuszsobolewski9839 not everyone in the imperium is hardcore zealous. There are some planets that basically just praise the emperor, but aren’t super fanatical
I imagine this is a more economical solution to get Ogryns to board transports, there was a paragraph in the 5th edition Imperial guard codex that described a common method to reliably get Ogryns on board was having a barrel of rations along with a 'volunteer' guardsman coaxing them inside. Normally the guardsman gets trapped inside but at least he doesn't have to necessarily take part in any battle that the abhumans were going to.
Yes, a friendly looking guardsmen who gets trapped with smelly and vomiting ogryns (like kids on a overcrowded bus)
Guardsman tard wrangler division
By the Emperor's Light that Guardman is a man amongst men; a living saint; a... guardman that is also unlikely to be showing up hung-over like he/she did to roll-call again.
That guard is also dead the second the ogryns panic. Literally, imagine a bunch of Lennies from Mice and Men
@@fantochedollmaker7030 I'd rather die in an Ogryn Frenzy than being ripped apart by, like, a Carnifex.
I love that rhyme. So Innocent and pure. Now go purge.
A few years ago I ran an ogryn character in Dark Heresy. Watching the DM react to my assorted prayers and nursery rhymes was precious. "Oh the Emperor good to me", "Emperor loves the little children", and the "Jack and Jill charged up the hill", were all opening lines that broke up the grimdark nicely.
Please, give us a rendition of "Jack and Jill charged up the hill"! I want that so much!
@@monkeybusiness673 I'll see if the muse strikes. I had one to the tune of Kidnap the Sandy Claws that I liked, but it was in the voice of a deranged juve ganger. "Kill all the (enemy in question goes here, heretics tends to fit fine), stab them in the head, beat 'em with a shovel then, to make sure they're dead! Kill all the heretics, shoot 'em in the throat! Stitch 'em up in a sack, throw them in the moat!!" and on as the situation warrants.
In burliest voice- "Emperor love the little children, all the children on his worlds! We be safe all through the night, and we grow up strong to fight! Emperor love the little *whispered* ogryn? ON HIS WORLDS!!!
Ogg was a lovely character and I think he was accidentally the most wholesome version of myself ever dropped into a game.
That has to be the most wholesome thing I've ever seen in the 40k universe.
You have to see ork santa claus
@@Psycho7452 Wait is that canon?! Or are you just talking about the model?
Whelp, time to bury it under 6 billion Tonnes of pointless GrimDerp, stupidity and Sphess Mahrehns before someone notices.
@@dominicscreativefilms from what i remember orks can bend warp to their liking. You just need enough orks to believie something is possible so yeah, i wouldn't be suprised if there is ork santa claus on rocked boosted sleigh goes from mob to mob in some special day and gives good ones more dakka and bad ones more beating in canon.
@@Psycho7452 This is canon in my book.
Ork 1: YEA! ME GOT A BIGGER DAKKA!
Ork 2: Me got few lumps....ow....
I love this. If I remember correctly, in the Only War rulebook the Ogryns were given a trait called "But it dark in dere!" that mentions that Ogryns are extremely claustrophobic and wont enter things like caves, basements, ruins, Chimeras, or even smaller than average buildings without some prodding. I can't recall of their claustrophobia was mentioned elsewhere in the 40k books (be they codex, rulebooks or novels) or video games.
It was a rule from either 3rd or 4th edition, think it was in the 3rd codex
Confirmed that an Ogryn will be playable in Darktide, so maybe we'll see it there.
I mean I'm 6'5 cramped spaces make me scared too I hate small cars. 🤣
Ogryn are from DAOT prison colonies so it makes no sense that thay're claustrophobic.
@@gardenthefermentingsound6218 seems like it makes perfect sense. What's your reasoning for it not making sense?
Now I'm imagining the Commissar bringing along a special glowglobe on deployment in case he has to bring Og into dark areas. "Look, Og. It's your favorite glowglobe, the one you keep lit during sleeptime. You'll have plenty of light in the transport now, won't you?"
Og: "Yet suh, I wills but it no make my tummies feel any betta."
This is now part of my personal headcanon.
He attacc
He protecc
He muster his courage to get into tancc
ogryn: why the ogryns over there have shine armors?
Comissar: Thats an astartes, Jerry
Ogryn: ooohh
Now I want to see more of Guardsman no. 2445075 and her "Ogryn buddy"
Now you have me wondering if its possible to augment ogryns like astartes and if so how big would they be
I'm thinking they'd look like a dreadnought
@@markusallen6818 you'd end up with really dumb dreadnoughts with dyslexia
@@markusallen6818 They would have to be entombed into a small titan probably.
That's called a Praetorian Servitor.
Ogryn: ummm....duh...do emperor travel though those aswell?
Commissar: Yes, if you behave you might meet him there one day.
>Ogryn proceeds to dive into the vehicle, hyped to potentially meet the Emperor
@@chaosinc.382 and on the Ogryn's inevitable death:
"Pappy Emprah was I.. was I good?"
"REAL GOOD SON. YOU WERE THE BEST."
@@TheKnightOfSmite Read that in TTS. There's no other option now. It's all TTS.
The commisar:*shoots the gaurdsmen that doesn't get on*
Also the commisar:"aw ogryn it's ok just take your time and brush your teeth and get in"
it's easier to be big and scary to a former peasant than a mutant that fit your head in its mouth
I think I read somewhere that bolter rounds bounce off ogryn’s skins.
Ogryns also are incredibly faithful to 'da Emperah', following any orders with child-like devotion as they genuinely believe the Emperor himself gave those orders through the chain of command. Comissars know well to value such a quality in those they lead.
A Good Commissar knows the value of discretion.
@@don_musavt well also commissars genuinely like ogryns
Look I ADORE a the well fleshed-out villains of the 40k universe.
But there is always a cozy place in my deeply heretical soul for stuff like this.
Is there anyone in the 40K universe who isn't a villain?
@@remandstimpy Probably papa smurf but he's too busy doing doodoo so no.
Lol there are no such things of heroes or villains factions
But the Imperium is considered to be the protagonists of warhammer 40k
Because they are us.
@@iconicusensign9624
And what does that make lorgar, exactly?
I guess he just sends his sons to commit atrocity after atrocity in the most morally grey way possible.
I don’t mean to be condescending, I’m just saying some of these guys are downright diabolical.
@@youngarchaeotech189
He was raised in a world that worships Chaos of course his mind gets corrupted
If you are looking for some one to blame
Blame Erebus he's the reason why the horus heresy happened to begin with.
I bet that Ogryn got a big shiny medal afterwards, he remembered all of that prayer and spoke it perfectly smooth. The whole company can be proud of him!
Like a father and child when they are having a bedtime or dinner prayer
Better the Ogryn be scared of getting inside a transport than some enemy of the Imperium.
Also that prayer was adorable. Like a prayer I used to say with my family before going to bed.
Also the fact one's happening in the middle of a fairly stable base environment while the other is likely happening in the heat of a firefight or Tyranid rushdown. Logistics at the base can be dealt with nice and easy but in a battle you need to restore order immediately.
people saying the commissar would shoot them. They try and be nice to ogryns cause having the Human-orks be mad at you on/before battle is a very bad idea
I think people forget that the commissars all come from different Progeniums and are all taught different forms of leadership and inspiration.
Much like everyone thinks Sororitas are all bolter blazing fanatics. They too all have different creeds and interpretations of the Creeds. Many of them are actually quite caring.
There are some commissars who threaten Ogryns with violence. Amongst them there are some strong and crazy enough to scare an Ogryn into submission, but not many. For everyone else, a very short career/life and a very unfortunate ratling janitor.
Bold of you to assume that handgun shot would penetrate their skull.
would end up getting used as a fucking fleshlight mate
We're talking about simple minds. Getting mad at them would probably stress them and not work so well, even if they don't rip you in half.
The patient approach, I could imagine, is probably more prevalent with Ogryn than with any other humans.
Why? They're hellbent to follow orders, and you won't have to waste time mid-fight to give them orders or keep them from routing. You spend that little bit of time prior to deployment, lmao.
"Wounded guardsman not keen on charging over no mans land for the fifth time"
-Commisar: Well thats a blamming.
"Ogryn not keen on entering a fairly large transport"
-Commisar: Come on, you can do it, cheer up laddie.
Ogryns are much more valuable than standard guardsmen... and if you blam them, they have a good chance of surviving it and being very angry with you.
@@noman8412
It's stated somewhere than Ogryns can go berserk with confusion if orders are not baby proof enough. If a Commissar told an Ogryn to Charge and then defend a hill until reinforcements arrive there's a chance he'll become red paint because he used more than 4 words.
There is a difference between a normal human and someone big as a space marine and capable of tearing you apart limb by limb
Pretty much like how Gordon Ramsey handles his kids vs a sous chef
There is a part in the Horus Heresy books where an Ogryn is taking bolt rounds and they are bouncing off his skin. They are pretty damn nutty lore wise.
Why did I think that this was going to end of mice and men style?
"Commissar the emperor will let me tend to his rabbits after right?'
" yes, hog..."
Probably while Og is bleeding out and there's no help coming...
Can you post the prayer, is is adorable
The Emperor is big and strong
He protects us humans all day long
He slays the chaos and xenos foe
So we may expand and always grow
He rules above, with us beneath
So follow orders and brush your teeth
The Emperor wants what’s best for you
So eat your rations and grow strong, it’s true!
1, 2, 1, 2! A marching tune! We go to face the foe!
We give them shells and las gun rounds and send them running too and fro!
The Emperor always guides us, he wants us too attack
For just as he protects us all, we must protect him back!
-Prayer #744 from the "Children's Catechism of Compliance"
@@noman8412 Thanks, keep up the amazing work. It is definitely going into my future parent folder, especially for the teeth brushing bit.
@@noman8412 simply divine, I Must use it as my personal prayer.
@@noman8412 SO IT WAS A PRAYER FO CHILDREN!
@@ofal5124 To be honest, I just can't imagine an Ogryn brushing his teeth.
This... caught me of guard, when me and my brother were little, he couldn't sleep because he had fear of the dark, so when we turn the lights off, i would read some books we had for him, even though I'm the oldest, he is bigger and stronger than me, and this little verse just reminded me of that time...
Well, never thought I would remember my childhood in a Warhammer verse, thanks, that was really something that made me smile
Space marines know no fear.
Guardsmen face fear on a dailey basis.
Ogryn guardsmen: Small tank scary.
They are notoriously claustrophobic and hate complicated, loud machinery. Asking an Ogryn to get in a tank is like asking someone with colorphobia and thassalophobia to free dive with Zany Zibbo the Clown. They aren't gonna. Just not happening.
Custodes: not afraid of anything except Asterion Moloc and clowns
I remember that the ogryns in the War of the Beast books where literally described as being coddled by their commissar, as he read pious nursery rhymes to them.
I feel like that prayer would be aimed at the children of the imperium. But it’s just too adorable😂😍
I mean thats basically what an Ogryn is just a big child
@@John-if9ig then they need to be loved and protected haha
Ogryn : man child of the imperium
it is, the prayer is from the children's catechism iirc
@@tomboysupremacist ahhh ok thank you. I didn’t know
be funny if after the prayer he restarted the argument over again saying its too scary and small, like this is the commisars 8th attempt
I've always loved the idea of commissars being more like this. Stern and dangerous, but still fatherly in a way.
Well Caiphas Cain was trying to teach his own students that. Trying to help the people under your command overcome fear by leading by example instead of just threating them with execution.
Theres also that time Gaunt basically called another commisar a fething idiot because it didnt understand why his men were retreating from a baneblade heading straight at thier position.
@@Makorze great examples indeed. I got audible a few months back and start up the Gaunt series, just finished book 3 and I'm finishing the first Cain book now.
And after that beautiful prayer and rhyme for the Ogryn...
He STILL refuses to enter the transport!!! 😂
sorry, I just had to.
on a serious note, that's amazingly written mate, good job!!!
Nursery rhymes 40k edition.
I just discovered the prefect nursury rhyme for my newborn son.
"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven."
Commissar: GUUUMMMP WHAT YOUR SOUL PURPOSE IN THIS ARMY!?!?
Og gump: TO DO WHATEVER YOU TELL ME TO COMMISSAR!
Commissar: GOD DAMN IT GUMP!
THAT IS THE MOST OUTSTANDING ANSWER I HAVE EVER HEARD.
YOUR A GOD DAMN GENIUS, YOU MUST HAVE AN GOD DAMN IQ OF 160.
Even in the grim darkness of the far future, there is wholesomeness.
If you actually think about it, it's not wholesome at all
@@imperialcommisar5279 if you think what the rest of the world is like, it's wholesome enough...
the genuinely heart warming relationship between an orgryn and commisar is one of my favorite bits of 40k lore. thier like supportive parents. giving them medals (most made up and for basic stuff) and showing great amounts of patience with them.
this is the wholesome 40k content I needed today!
Had a bad day at work, that prayer was just what I needed.
I love this, this is so good! Yes, they are about to go off to war, and one or both of them (or the entire platoon) may get las'd to dust in the process, but this is very wholesome. I approve, bravo Commissar!
"Ogryn! What is your mission?"
*"To do whatever you tell me too, sir?"*
"By the Emperor thats the best answer i ever heard! You are a genius! Give this man a medal!"
This PLUS the POTION MAKER would be wierdly wonderful 😁
"Alright, good huddle. Now get in the vehicle, there'll be a few hundred Orkz waiting for you to smash in the name of the Emperor a dozen of miles from here.
The emperor protects."
"Th' Empuhrah Protecks."
Wow, Ogryn are treated sooooo well.
Pissing off a 8 to 10 feet tall man child is a VERY bad idea
Keep in mind, these guys have the same health and durability as a custodes on the tabletop, just without the fancy armor and worse accuracy. The only way you're gonna get ogryn to do something is if you make them want to do something.
@yossarian Luckily it is actually easy to get them to like and trust you, you just have to deal with their acute claustrophobia.
This is why I love that *"If the Emperor had a text-to-speech device"* (TTS) parody series by Alfabusa and Co. (friends and fellow RUclipsrs) invented the term; *"Orgyn buddies."* which is what a Guardsmen regiment from the (TTS parody version of the) planet "Jopal" calls them because they're mostly friendly, big, simple minded, battle buddies. Specifically a named female Guardswoman, named "Pesh" first uses the term when she mistakenly called the (TTS parody) Primarch Corax, the Raven as such because of his giant stature, though noted that he was a particularly strange one, being very well spoken for an *"Ogryn buddy."*
You have melted this Nurgle devotee's heart with that prayer 😆 gotta love Ogryns
This has made Nurgle quite pleased.
I want to cry. This is so so so wholesome
"Would da Empra luv me if i was a worm?"
"... Yes Thud, he would"
"GET IN THE BLASTED CARRIER, OG!" the commissar asked calmly to the scared ogryn trying to herd him unto the crassus.
That ogryn must've been the smartest ogryn that ever lived, memorized the prayer and was even able to perfectly speak a sentence
Comissar when ogryn disobeys orders: Let's pray so that you can find your strenght!
Comissar when standard guardsman disobeys orders: So you have chosen death
Not usually. Of the 12 Comissars I've seen, only one has that energy. The other 11 only kill their men when it is absolutely necessary.
@@theoverpreparerlamenters3r436 yes if they are to trigger happy his own men will go against him and put a "grenade" on his fox hole
@@jeffthemercenary No good Guardsman would ever be so traitorous as to kill his Commisar!
Those mysterious Ork snipers though...that's a different story. Never would have expected one on a planet being assailed by Tyranids, but there he was!
to be fair, good luck trying to execute what's essentially a human ork. it's much more viable to just bear with them, as they're more than willing to serve 'Da Emperah' as long as they overcome their claustrophobia
May the Emperor always protects Ogg
i can just picture
commisar: stop fiddling with that
cyborg ogryn 'stops messing with his ear piece, crossing his arms and pouting': buh it'ssu oll icheee
I'm told i have a renegade attitude when it comes to 40K.
Maybe i wouldn't die for the Emperor...but i would die for that wholesome Ogryn buddy :D
By the Emperor! This is Wholesome.
The Doom Guy has his rabbit. Commisars have their Ogryns
A whole race of Lennys, and an unusually patient commissar... awesome and adorable at the same time.
There are three jobs commisars worrh about being assigned to:
krieg regiments- where the commisar could be killed by his regiment FOR NOT ORDERING A BAYONET CHARGE.
Catchan Regiments- notorious for Fragging the more stern commisars by "accident"
Ogryn detachments-accidently being crushed when your troopers want a hug.
Awe I'm crying 😢 this is the cutest thing ever 😭 truly amazing and heart warming ❤
I believe there are potentially some average intelligent ogryn out there simply by the mere vastness of the universe and those ogryns are potentially super deadly
Average intelligent Ogryn are rare and usually turned into Bone'eads
To qualify as an ogryn commissar you need to be a good father of 4 kids minimum.
Ogrens are just precious. That Og must be a bone head,he remembered the whole prayer!
On the way back from battle:
Commissar:"....can I please get two happy meals"
Ogryn:"wit da rach sauce ples!"
Commissar: *sigh* "with ranch sauce please"
when i have kids, im teaching them this
Ogryn: Sir, why that ogryn green?
Commissar: That's an Ork, Larry. KILL IT!
This is too pure for the 40k universe. Emperor bless Og and his commissar.
"OK, now that we've said our prayers, will you get in?"
"Nuh-uh, too small and scary!"
i love "for just as he protects us all, we must protect him back."
If a Guardsman didn't want to get in the transport, he'd have been BLAM'd without hesitation. Emperor bless those big guys.
The ogryn is that human most blessed in body and most cursed of the mind. They are not at fault for the lesser capabilities to force them is to anger. to guide them is to lead. the ogryn does not know to betray unless guided by others. any commissar to read these words should take it to hard. One must lead the orgryn by example and there will be disloyalty.
Blessed is the mind too small for doubt.
"Nice ogryn, good ogryn, sweet ogryn, won't you step into the nice spaceship for the commissar? Pretty please, pretty pretty pretty please? Nice ogryn with sugar on top and some whip cream, nice organ, good ogryn, sweet ogryn?"
"Me Grimlock not 'nice ogryn'. Me has brains!"
Despite being ugly as sin, ogryns are the most adorable thing in 40k.
they are like pugs
Ye
“Arthur get IN the tank!”
“Your not my dad”
“Get IN the fucking Crassus I AM your dad!”
Ogryns are so adorable.
"...we must protect Him back!"
"Now, will you enter the transport?"
"No, too small, too scary."
The fact that the ogryn had that much memorized is a considerable feat
Guardsman: "oi boss, how come we don't get cute little songs like that"
Commissar: *blam*
Just found this by accident and i wasnt dissappointed XD Great work
Did that commissar just use a nursery rhyme to get an ogryn to do something?
That's fucking adorable.
So wholesome! I really always loved the ogryns!
The fact that the commisar knows the prayer off by heart really shows how often he's used this technique to send these baby boys to their death.
They're good lads Sargent
I can remember this being one of my first content I ever saw of 40K...
“tell me about the rabbits george”
Ayo that's fire bro 🔥
In the grim darkness of the far future, there’s still wholesomeness.
I like to imagine Ogryn who serve in the Death Korps of Krieg don’t like wearing the gas masks and pout about having to put them on. And their Commissars have to spend hours trying to convince them to put it on.
Im not crying. Definitely not crying at how wholesome this is
Commissar to Ogyrn: oh dear, gorgeous
Commissar to guardsmen: you fucking donkey
"Warhammer is grimdark"
Warhammer:
Its true tho its called a grimdark future for a reason
OGG is why I have subscribed to your channel.