Her MOTHER TRICKED HER into bleaching her skin because she kept refusing.
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- Опубликовано: 24 ноя 2024
- Her MOTHER TRICKED HER into bleaching her skin because she kept refusing. The rampant skin bleaching or lightening pandemic that our parents won't let go of.
Some of us our African moms can't stand us being dark skinned I don't get it. I love my dark skin but my mom always criticizes it she always tells me my dark skin is dirty and that I have to lighten it. I think that hating dark skin is a mental illness because I embrace my dark skin.
I’m so sorry :(💔
@@MariePriss 😂😂😂 Thank you.
The stubbornness of African parents!!!....Thank God you decided a different path for yourself.❤💚
You are amazing... Keep it up.
I’m sorry you have to go through that we as black women go through enough insecurities Ik it has to be painful to hear it even inside your home
The grandmother refusing the black doll speaks volumes about her own insecurities and self-hatred 😢
You mean the one with gaped teeth a desal truck can drive thru with no problem. She need to worry about that gap in her teeth then she will be on point
I would not be around a parent like her.
@@CarolynFrazier-nu4xzdamn carolyn 😭
She would it be allowed to hold my child with that foolishness.
Yes I feel so bad for that child. There are black ppl all over the world God populated the earth with us. I know ppl don’t like the term black and a lot of times I see they associate the term with black Americans and the negative stereotypes they have been bombarded with. But that’s what I’m comfortable with using, others are more comfortable identifying with nationality or ethnic group. I personally use that term as a black American because it’s very hard to trace my exact roots so I understand why ppl do that but to deny who you really are is very sad to me. I grew up in Mississippi which is the American south for ppl that may not be familiar with the US but anyway my grandma was very what we call color struck in the south. She was dark with a wide nose and very full lips. So her children all 8 of them range in skin color of dark to caramel complexion. My sister came out my grandma’s color and features and I came out more caramel complexion with slightly smaller nose and lips. My grandma did not treat us any different because she was a very loving person but, when I had my first child my daughter came out really light because her dad is black and Spaniard and she was so happy she cried. It made me want to cry because I could see her pain. She never told us darker skin was ugly but she did say she had it harder in life because she was so dark and she didn’t want her children to experience the same discrimination even amongst our own kind. Other ppl would call me pretty and my sister ugly because of our differences and it always pissed me off because that’s my big sister who I always looked up to and we actually didn’t look that different because when we’re all together you can see my grandma in all of us but other ppl made it a point to make differences which have affected her for life. She bleaches and I know it’s a direct result of those experiences growing up.
The Dominican mom letting her mom force that light doll on her baby is crazy because ain’t no way my mom would still be holding my child acting like that!
She was recording to show ppl how our parents act. This is crazy. I would of still took my child after I got the footage.
I was JUST thinking this!
Literally! So disturbing
Facts. It’s amazing the daughter wasn’t brainwashed
Then the mom recording it…..
"Help me, my baby was born fair and is now turning dark. What do I do?" Nothing. Absolutely nothing. You recognise the bias that exists against darker skin both in yourself and in other races and you teach your child to love themselves, never put them down for their skin colour and raise them to be secure because darker skin doesn't make anyone a lesser human period.
Unfortunately a lightening cream is a much quicker fix for some parents than having these conversations 💔
Lol imagine white people freaking out when their kids' hair changes color! Like just accept it and move on. Take photos to document how beautiful they look at each stage, but in the end their gonna look like you!
You love your baby like everyone else does,if you're focused on her complexion,that just means you don't love her 100% and that's sad. Most black babies are born fair and later darken. This is the Craziest thing I've ever heard in my life.Stop with the evil Colorism.
@@tintamanenguThis is totally ridiculous.Any parent that bleaches their kid doesn't love what God gave them. You should love on your children,Nourish them and take care of them,but you don't love yourself so why should we expect you to love your child. It's not your property or pet. It's a Child given by God,and these same parents have the nerve to be "Holier than thou". Just sick‼️
so many people get shocked to find out all babies are born fair skinned and then later change in skin tone and act like sorcery is happening. you love your baby just the way they are - or else you never should've had a child.
my first language is spanish and here 01:45 the grandmother is literally telling the mother that the little girl looks exactly like the white/blonde doll 🤦🏻♀️
Sad sad sad
As a Dominican who didn’t grow up w these ideologies I am so embarrassedddddd
She chose the cheeks to draw a comparison between her grandchild and the doll.
Funny how mom couldn't do the same with the black doll and her daughter using skin color.
😮 I am flabbergasted. That’s a crazy amount of delusion.
That baby is a black Dominican brown skinned baby, she don't look nothing like that recessive weird eyed whyte baby doll 😂😂😒😒😫.
I would take my baby back and she wouldnt ever see her again.
Me too
This!
Facts!!! A lot of these parents need to understand that is not their child/ren and they don’t have the same rights as the parent just because they birthed them. I think a lot of parents try to control how their children raise their own children when it’s really not up to them. They overstep boundaries a lot!
Exactly, I was pissed off by the grandma 😤
100% because today its the doll tomorrow it’s the cancer causing soap
Dark skin is so so beautiful I wish it was more advertised and normalised in society darker skin means better melanin and no wrinkles! And no sunburn!
It's really is so beautiful ❤️💚
I agree. I use to be IN LOVE with darker skinned boys (still am. Always will be). But i wasnt the “right” way to look mixed for them. So i just departed and married another mixed person 😂🤷🏽♀️ but now im not “pure enough for him” 🙄😂
Tell my mom because we went back to the country and she got a mean sunburn 😂
Well, the no sunburn part is unfortunately not true. It's very important that black people wear sunblock too, or they can risk getting a sunburn and skin cancer
But I 100% agree that black skin is absolutely gorgeous! 🥰🥰
see right there is the problem -- you went from wanting equality to speaking about how you’re better lmaoooo it’s not about equality for y’all it’s about superiority.
If a mother is forcing your kid to play with only a certain toy instead of what you got, she will not see the grandchild again. I am the darkness in my whole family and now get stopped by people who thank me for not bleaching. Living in UK has made me lighter though as not much sun. Glad we are now in summer and catching some sun.
I'm not black, and not dark skin. Even outside of the black community i can see the hate and it's always towards women... It's so sad, because dark skin is so incredibly beautiful....
It's a whole pandemic but nobody will ever convince me that dark skin isn't beautiful.
Darker skinned people who arent of black african descent are still treated just as horrible and are literally erased out of history. I am confident majority of you (including koreans) would be mind blown if yall knew how dark Jeju people are NATURALLY. Ive literally met Koreans that were legit brown and had every right calling themselves caramel (unlike people who are yellow and swear they are caramel, despite ACTUAL caramel being light brown 😂 because who cares about truth and definitions…am i right 😂). My grandma is super fair, but my hreat grandfather EASILY tanned to my non tan color. The day i met my cousin who was just as “dark” as me…the way i fawned over his skin color…lives rent free in his head to this day 😂😂😂😂
@@BlasianLynn it was your yt ancestry that forced you to change the topic from unambiguous black woman
@@dorathehoora4527she made a good point you reached for the stars with that one
@@dorathehoora4527 👀
My father is light skin and type 3 hair. He loved to tan, he always was in the sun and picked his curls out to get the afro he loves so much..he married my dark skin type 4 mother and adored her. They both made me happy to be me. Thank God for my parents.
A white friend of mine introduced me to his Dominican friends (fair skinned). They treated me with disregard because my skin was darker than theirs. Honestly white racists had been more polite to me. I felt pity for those Dominicans: small island mentality.
Exactly I hate the way they think it’s sad honestly. They are always trying to 💩 on anyone darker including the Haitians that have afforded them the freedom they now enjoy 🤦🏾♀️
lol don’t trick yourself, white racists might have tried to come across as polite to your face but they hate you too. don’t give them the satisfaction of giving them more grace. they don’t deserve it.
As a Dominican with light skin, I know some people treat me different just cause my skin color, specifically men. 💀
Honestly I've never really understood why that was even a thing whether dark or light skinned.
@@tintamanengulol deeply rooted in how colored people are raised. They think lighter is better
Bro if that’s you in your pfp you’re genuinely one of the most beautiful people I’ve EVER seen wtf
@@le_reveriereal
Same here, being black America, but we can't accept this wicked raycist and sexist behavior from males, bm along with that whyte man are the reasons why this shit is happening, it needs to be stopped. 😢
Gen X here!!! The white doll situation is disturbing 😢
I will never straighten my hair- not just for me but for all the littles looking up to me!!!
you know brown vs board of education? They literally are acting it out
My fiancé is actually the person who convinced me to go natural. No kids yet. One day he said you can do whatever you want with your hair how. When we have children you need to have natural hair. I couldn’t argue with that.
I get so much hostility because I no longer slick my afro hair but knowing the little ones see me, I know I'm doing the right thing!
as a gen z that doesn’t ever leave the house with natural hair anymore (straightening, blow outs etc) this made me cry. Y’all are amazing
From your pfp you have gorgeous hair
This is so sad. Why would you do that to your own Granddaughter dang.
Bleaching your baby in the womb? Oh Lord😢
Thats so wicked😢😢😢
@@meijie9171extremely
This should be a crime!
Agree @@meijie9171
I had a friend i was judging cause she was bleaching her skin(causing her burning skin and pimples), but she once yold me her father ask her if she is still take shower cause she has getting darker... i think it's a problem that will never be solve cause people like his father don't see how problematic it is to think like this
I hope she raises her kids differently but that may be hard too because how she handled her situation was also not the best. I'm not judging I totally understand her but I also know how hard it can be to raise your kids right when you're not well equipped having faced the same challenges.
How tf can a FATHER think that his daughter's skin is getting darker... because she isn't clean enough??? How ignorant and damaging is that???
@@luchirimoyaI think by that they moreso meant he was asking that because he could tell she wasn’t using the skin lightening soap. Not that she’s dirty. (I think)
@@silentxculture8605im mixed black and white and my white grandpa used to rub at my face/arms cause some parts is slightly darker. He did that thing where you lick your thumb so I'd carry on and my nana would rush in like "what's all the fuss about" He'd say he's tryna get a patch of dirt off me and she'd come over and go "we need to get your glasses stronger, that's her skin" 😂 some people are just genuinely a bit silly, but at the same time I have had people be rude to me
@@silentxculture8605im mixed black and white and my white grandpa used to rub at my face/arms cause some parts is slightly darker. He did that thing where you lick your thumb so I'd carry on and my nana would rush in like "what's all the fuss about" He'd say he's tryna get a patch of dirt off me and she'd come over and go "we need to get your glasses stronger, that's her skin" 😂 some people are just genuinely a bit silly, but at the same time I have had people be rude to me
Skin lightening and new born are words that should never be in a sentence together, let alone a conversation. Omg this is so scary wtf. 😢
0:15 She's teaching that baby self hatred 😢
Colorism in this world is so real. I’m dark skinned. I get compliments about my skin tone all the time BUT the compliment is usually accompanied with ppl thinking I’m mixed with Indian, or thinking I’m Ethiopian or Somalian. Black ppl only like dark skin when the person looks mixed 😒
Also, I knew a guy that only dated light skinned women because he wanted light skinned babies with “good hair”
@Babyluv that's true but not a generalized truth meaning many people celebrate darker women with clear afro features nupita, kelly Rowland, sonya barbie, Yaya dicosta , and many more . I'm using celebrities because they sre well known and often times you see people praise them for thier darker hues you couldn't mistaken them for anything outside of black. Of courses other darkskin women who are normal nin famous obtain praise too and again they have no real mix look just attractive and. Even tone
He learned that from his mom more than likely . If you notice this is coming from the mothers and the grandmothers. It’s not the men that perpetuate this idea. If you pay attention to any of these videos, it’s always the women that push this idea and it’s honestly sick.
My sons mixed.and he won't date any black girls either will his friends. They say they don't want dark skinned babies. To each is own.
Same!! I’m dark skin African American but people always think I’m Ethiopian though those women are beautiful I see why it’s the features. Featurism is a thing as well!!
I thank God & our Ancestors for bringing me out of my skin bleaching & self hating days. But sis , they’re out here “bleaching babies “?!?!? Omgggg! This has to Stop immediately! Ase
Girl, they're bleaching embryos. I'm so proud of your growth ❤️💚🥰 and thanks for sharing.
Yes Indians do that
My father raised my esteem as a child. He always told "You are a black beauty and never bleach that beautiful skin" 44 years down the road, I am glad he kept on telling me those words which i am now telling to my daughters as well. We are beautifully and wonderfully created in the Image of God.
Also Asian I’m talking south Asian (Indian, Bengali, Sri Lankan) im south Asian and in my community there are a lot of darker ppl in my country and we are told to bleach skin and lighter ppl are more attractive which is so sad even in the movies in South Asia they always hire the European looking woman with lighter skin and smaller noses it’s so so sad I wish it could change
I wish so too but thats less likely to happen if the skin bleaching doesn't stop.
See as a Bengali girl, literally( the day)after my mother died the next subject was my skin color .My father was worrying who is going to marry me....😢😂.... still my skin color is hounting my father and relatives....😅
Indian aunties be like : "Oh you are quite dark compared to your friends what will your future husband think?I know a place that can correct that for you" yes they meant bleach its always "How will you find a husband looking like that?" or "How will your husband feels?"
@@tintamanengu that mentality is thousands of years old in the region. Its not changing any time soon
Imagine passing on self hate to your children…what is wrong with people?
Heart breaking!!!!!! Dark skin is is absolutely beautiful!!! Ages slow and looks like silk!!!
❤💚
Looks like silk? LOL! Isn't black skin known to be dry?
Nope 😂😂@@kennedy9359
@@kennedy9359 yes the term is "ashy"
This is child abuse, manipulation and traumatic to ever go through.... Children don't deserve this.... YOU'RE LITERALLY BEAUTIFUL AND GORGEOUS AND STUNNING JUST AS YOU ARE, GOD MAKES NO MISTAKES BABYYYYYY'S YOUR SKIN IS FLAWLESS PERIOD!
I didn’t learn about skin bleaching until HS. Im American but went to HS in a Caribbean neighborhood in NYC. I will say this is NOT popular in black Americans at all but wow all my Jamaican friends taught me about cake soap etc by telling me I needed it. I didnt even know the diaspora had this problem. It seems like it would be more of an American thing since we are the ones that live in a mostly non black country. I wonder why that is?
We’re all beautiful. 😢🖤
Colonisation did a number on us. We are healing though.
And watch them swear up and down that they don’t have racism issues like the US smh. It’s like people trying to tell you that the sky isn’t blue in their country…as if we don’t have eyes…
This is also why I will always be pro national unity and anti cultural assimilation. We should be allowed to simply exist in whatever country we live in without forgoing our ancestry.
The cultural egotism and entitlement of ‘lightness’ is exhausting. Like what you will, prefer what you will. The imposing generalities on others, coupled with the stereotypical lies is what needs to stop. It’s completely unnecessary in society.
Cake soap will not bleach you though.
@@YurinanAcquiline I know. My point was I had no idea what it was.
@@denyshadials5702 you said a wordddd. I am also very anti assimilation espppp growing up in a multicultural city. But people act like Im voting for Trump by saying yes African Americans do have culture and its not yours. 😂
Trentinoin bleached my face. My dad was the one to tell me that I need to go outside and tan or something because my neck was in Africa but my face was in the Middle East. I was so concerned about my acne going away I wasn’t even paying attention to the gradually lightening of it.
I'm sorry but you dad is so funny 🤣🤣🤣 my mum is the first to notice acne products bleaching my skin too. I guess now that you've mentioned it I may also be too focus on trying to clear my acne, that barely notice other effects. I'm so glad you have your father to remind you ❤️💚💜
Your neck in Africa and your face in Middle East😂😂😂😂 he is hilarious
Colorism in our black society is real. I’ve experienced this so many times going out with my friends. Once I was with my two dark-skinned friends and a guy loudly said “Hey yellow woman, thanks for the color”. I was so embarrassed. Another time a guy told me he loved my complexion. It was so “clean”.
A childhood friend of mine has bleached her skin so much, she’s 3 shades lighter. Her older sister bleached to a mulatto and is now lighter than me. It’s terrible that people do not see black as beautiful and how this plays on women.
Damn the doll thing is crazy. My mom kept my light dolls to a minimum. She’d hunt for darker dolls with curly hair and features like mine. Which was pretty hard during the time. Really only had bratz fr. It’s so crazy to me cause the baby is obviously brown. So what is the grandma even trying to instill ?? Self hate ??? The level of brainwashing is actually insane to see. Very extreme
Girl in the pink outfit still makes me so sad. Hearing her say “ idc I want the benefits” is heartbreaking.
Where i live in the USA, you cant even get that type of stuff.
Im mixed (two mixed parents). My mother (a extremely self hateful and racist woman) LITERALLY put powder bleach LIKE LITERAL BLEACH on a rag and would scrub me. To this day I have chemical burns that caused discoloration on my knees and elbows. And the irony of it, my mom loves calling my Gma racist (mainly cause my gma calls her out for her ratchet shinannigans so OF COURSE that makes my gma racist 🙄 if ykyk), my gma and mom LITERALLY fell out because my mom is so racist. My gma laughed right in her face and said
“You mad my new husband is black. You mad you black. You mad your daughter is black. Why didnt you have her with a WM? Or better yet, why have her at all 🤷🏽♀️ why not give her to me and go live your life like i told you 🤷🏽♀️ yea okay”. And naturally my grandma disowned my mother when i finally admitted to her how horrible and racist my mom treated me. DO NOT BLEACH YOUR SKIN.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that, I hope everything gets better and I'm so proud of you for staying true to yourself and also for sharing this.💚❤
That’s terrible. It’s not racist though.
It’s called self hate and colorist also she favored one color over another.
@@chrysanthe1297nah that’s racist. Both are borderline the same thing. Racism is treating someone bad bc of a skin color and I 100% guarantee that’s what happened here😬 same race or not. Calling it colorism is downplaying the actual abuse that happened here.
Wow
I hope it gets better soon.
@Misty_kittyyy Two things can be true at once.
It is NOT downplaying to admit the lady you responded to's mother IS full of self hate.
There are things that can be admittedly equally awful, but DIFFERENT. Someone who commits adultery is guilty of sin, just as someone who touches a child has committed a sin ; BUT while both wrong, abd both cause pain & emotional damage , they are IDENTICAL offenses and obviously the latter is also far more heinous.
Self hate is NOT synonymous with racism. It should be self explanatory why. They are BOTH ugly, hateful, damaging trains of thought that often lead to hateful ACTIONS, but they are each coming from a very different place/reason.
What I have noticed is people who are bleaching often looks raw and tender. The skin on their face looks one way and other parts of the body such as their hands look a different colour. I have also noticed that as much as it is thought by many that melananted skin is strong is often not the case. The result is black skin can be 'washed out' for want of a better way to put it in two to three generations.
I pulled up to a hospital and this young dark-skin lady walked up to my vehicle and asked if I needed valet parking. I just stared at her for a minute, she said, did you hear me? I said I'm so sorry your skin is so flawless, clear, and in the sun's reflection you can see a hint of gold in your skin. Dark skin is so beautiful!
"Loving yourself is the most radical thing you could possibly do."
-An absolute Queen. ❤
❤💚
Exactly. I love my mum a great deal but she kept on trying to convince me to use creams that are known for bleaching.
Edit: I had no idea the bleaching epidemic was outside of Africa as well. I'm proud of my generation, we're breaking those shackles by force..
So glad you didn't give in. We have a lot to unlearn, our parents too.
She said people called her charcoal due to the negative comments she decided to bleach her skin
Now people are saying that she’s a follower and trying to be white
But these comments, she does not listen to !???!!
Because she seen what it's like on both sides. She prefers having some privilege over having none. She's being insulted and attacked no matter what she does, so she's choosing herself over their perceptions.
Those people arent gonna do 💩 all to improve her life if she stops. They are offering nothing but more attacks. And for what? Society as a whole? If she doesn't tell people, no one would know. They simply treat her based on her appearance.
And girliepops was dead wrong. Women who don't wear makeup are absolutely discriminated against, for gender related reasons. Even in the workplace they can accuse us of "unprofessional appearance" due to our makeup, natural hair, any number of things that can be either gender or race oriented.
I don't agree with the practice but everyone was responding to the "idea of bleaching" not to this girl's personal experiences. She wasn't pushing it on anyone, just explaining her reasoning and everyone just wants her to sacrifice herself for the cause while doing nothing to actually fight it themselves. She needs to suffer for other people's ideals because why? Because the philosophy? Tell her how it's gonna make her life better to stop doing something that she can physically see and experience the gains from.
Every February we celebrate Black History, including the history of black people becoming the first in their field to do something _because they passed as white_
We don't remember the amazing and talented black people who weren't allowed to succeed because they did not. Their names didn't make it into history books. Should we posthumously condemn the lightskinned people who made it, because "they actually just _contributed_ to colourism instead of solving it"? Or do we just accept that they lived in a society where it wasn't _possible_ to succeed if your skin was too dark. Where you would be passed over despite your talents and abilities if you didn't look a certain way. Where the things you built would be stolen, ripped off, or burned to the ground with your whole family inside if you got even a little but successful, just within your own demographic.
Girl, we still live in that society. Look at the 💩 that girls as pale as Zendaya are still catching if they dare to take a role that has ever been portrayed by a yt girl. Including fantasy characters portrayed by cartoons. That one girl getting called comments like "It's supposed to be Snow White not Charcoal Black" when I literally thought she was a caucasian and had to be informed she's Hispanic or smth.
Colourism is so much worse within the community because outside of it, we all get tarred with the same black brush. We're obsessively checking shades, while palm coloured people are going "All dark people are bad, but let's just lighten them up a few shades to improve that" then turning around and bronzing themselves into a whole other race for clout online.
Did you know there was a whole controversy because when the guys from BTS got put together, 2 of them told the oldest one he was "So black you can't be seen at night"? Then he repeated those words in English on an Australian radio show, having no idea how offensive it was everywhere else in the world? How did I go and look up a picture of them together and not know which of them was supposedly the "dark" one? All Koreans know though. They all look like snow to me, but the colourism _within_ a community is a thousand times greater than outside of it.
Girl is out here telling her story but no one wants to listen. She's not bleaching anyone but her own self but she's getting blamed for the entire system that abused her into making the choice.
You understand that's like attacking someone for being in the closet (and not dating or being on the dl) because staying in the closet feeds into homophobia? Nobody making a safe space for lgbt+ just telling them it's their fault other people are being victimised and if they don't step out to be victimised too, they're the real problem? Not the homophobes victimising people, the victims themselves are at fault for hiding from the violence and hate? Make it make sense.
Staying black and loving ourselves doesn't erase our trauma or change the discrimination we face. Period. I've never followed instructions to stay out of the sun or straighten my hair and that hasn't changed 💩 all for the next generation. My niece grew up hearing all the same 💩 and dealing with all the same 💩 I did.
Look at Destiny's Child. Exact same events as the Supremes happening decades later. And Beyonce _stays_ blond, straight haired, pale-skinned, caucasian featured, and whitewashed on magazine covers without any complaints. Her fans complain on her behalf, while she stays silent and collects paychecks.
So many amazing singers of that era and only the one who looks like Barbie in a sepia filter succeeds? Do you remember the betrayal the "Karens" all felt when she dropped Formation? Were you there for that? The flood of content all saying they thought she was here for them, not us? It was wild. She, like Diana Ross, was accepted only because she _looked_ the part. No amount of talent was enough if her looks didn't follow.
Nicki did countless interviews explaining the Barbie aesthetic was purely to get views because she wasnt getting looked at before the execs told her what to change. Pink wig, pastel colours, and lighting to make her look paler. It worked. She's also done countless interviews insisting that Cardi only made it by copying that aesthetic. Her talent don't matter as much as her palatability to light skin oriented audiences. According to other successful black women.
Now tell me why every successful black female artist known to the mainstream audiences had to buy her hair or her color? With so many natural hair beauties on tv and in movies now, how come it's like tryna find a needle in a haystack looking for a natural haired black female artist known to the general populace? It's not that hard to find natural haired caucasian artists. Not remotely difficult to find natural haired black male artists. Why do only black women have to change their look to succeed mainstream?
It's still us in the very bottom rung of society. I hate the practice but I can't blame a girl for wanting out, even by one degree of privilege. I can't blame anyone for just not wanting to suffer more than necessary, if they arent imposing anything on anyone else.
I'm not coming after girls who damage their hair with straightening chemicals or who buy fake hair to fit in. It's their bodies, and they have to deal with the discrimination at work, school, on the street and even at home. It's my choice to wear and love my natural hair, but that don't give me any right to come for the girls who don't. I don't get a high horse to sit on and look down at my own people who are suffering.
@@pvp6077I think that for women in music, even entertainment to an extent- wigs/loose textured hair and full glam is still very much expected in PR settings like interviews red carpet etc. I kind of see it like 50s-70s white women's office fashion being heels and tight dresses- just instead of corporate men it's the entertainment industry saying "fine, you can come in, but only if you look glamorous and sexy 24/7" especially for dark skinned women
I will never, and i mean NEVER understand why dark/brown skin is seen as ugly. What about our skin pains people so much? Like if you dont want black or brown babies, then dont get with black or brown people. The doll grandmother was dark herself, if there's a trait for darker skin, then the baby can come out dark. That poor child.
This 'colorism' also happen is SEA (Southeast Asian), thank God I born lightskin compared to my family, but my brother's skin color is darker even compared to 'normal' people around us, and it is impossible to go to family gathering without a single comment about my brother's skin color.
I always tell him, we (our small family; my parents, and I) are love his skin color, it is from our beloved granma, she was the only reason my father can get his life like this now because she make it possible for our father to attend university.
But it's still little bit heart breaking whenever I found his skincare and body lotion that offer skin whitening effect
And I KNOW the mocking about skin color gonna be super severe for a girls, so I am thankful I born this way
It's unfortunate that your brother has to go through that and that colorism is so horrible so much so that you find relief in not being as dark.
@@tintamanengu I am honestly feel so bad for the fact that I feel relief I born light skin, but it is what it is, for girl it is just another level if you have dark skin, if you a boy just like my brother, atleast the one that said it just family member, BUT if you a girl, EVERYONE pick a bone with you, so many my friends being bullied SO BAD just because she little bit darker, and jobs also prefer light skin girl while for boy it's just about their skills.
Ngl, if I have children, and society still like this, I would choose my son to go through dark skin, because once they grow past 20, it just doesn't matter much, while girl, it still somehow super matter.
The fact that I also getting comment about my skin color recently because lately I love to go swimming and even the aunties at swimming pool told me I should take a break because I am getting darker, mind you I am already in my mid 20 😂
I understand the dynamics are the way they are for you, but I hope you at least stood up for the discrimination your friends and family are going through.
@@takia6533 don't worry, I am, I am very stern about that, ofc they say I can't get the joke etc, but I always told them off, in fact I am also getting bullied by people that bullied my friends bcs her skincolor, they bullied me bcs I defending her, in fact the bullies get so mad at me to the poin they actually invite my friend (that being bullied bcs her skin color) to bully me, lol, and ofc she join them, they treat her as their slave ofc, it is super sad
For my brother, I always stood up for him everytime family member make a comment about his skin color, to the poin one of my family member hate me bcs of that
im older gen z- Caribbean. my dad is darkskin and made a point to make sure i saw tons of good black role models and had black dolls. my mother is light and understood how hateful people are and never brought up skin. when i got to secondary school then i found out how much people care about skin for this first time
Once your mom is light , your dad isn't as pro black as you want us to Believe.
@racheljones4561 This is such a primitive line of thought. not only mixed people are light. and if he married a lightskin, it doesn't make him less proud of our heritage...
@@janaekelis You can go ask your dad why he married your mom an see if her light skin isn't one of the first thing he mentions.
@@janaekelis ask him why he married your mom , and listen to his answer.
@@racheljones4561 I think this thought is very flawed because you can still think your light-skinned wife is beautiful while loving you and other dark-skinned people's skin tone and being proud of it. You can’t just force someone to get with the people they support or else they are lying. And you don't know anything about their father besides his and his wife's skin colors and stance on colorism. You don't know his former partners or anything to make you think this and you still made this assumption and said it. I think you should question your mindset if that was your first thought.
I’m so glad as a brown Puerto Rican that my family is so proud and loud about their dark skin! Some of my family is lighter then others but even then my lighter family members have never looked down on or tried to change our skin or make us hate our color or hair. I love my tan skin and my curly hair and I refuse to straighten it!!! I love my culture and my people and I’m so glad I have the family I have
Wow my mom she was burned and turned dark but even before that unfortunate event she always taught us Black is beautiful. They’d bully my mom for being dark then she had light skinned daughters but she told us dark is beautiful. She would tell me Alek Wek wakes up to millions because of her beautiful dark skin. I love being Black and I don’t care how dark I’ve gotten over the years because I want to look like my mom or darker ❤
Also we aren’t light because of any mixing it was just a coincidence. My parents are both Black and darker than us but my aunts were very light and would pick on my mom. They’d date light skinned men only to have dark skin kids and got mad at mom who didn’t care but God through a big twist
12:58 that’s absolutely incorrect because as someone who is a lighter skin I definitely always want to talk about the colorism conversation because for a long time I did not like black men for almost 10 years because I saw how disgustingly colorist that they are. I am strongly an ally for dark skin, black women, and all black women in general.
You're right, not everybody is like that. Some ppl call it out while others marinate in it. In fact a few weeks ago jubilee did a dark skin vs light skin middle ground video and it was actually a great discussion.
@HoneyChild-8 many lightksin famous people have been exposed for 'marinating' in it online. And many people speak of their experiences with lightskin ppl both men and women. Let's not act like it doesn't happen.
@@HoneyChild-8 yellow bone is what he wants is a song Dani Leigh did when da baby was going back and forth between her and he's beautiful dark skin ex. She finally got him (for a while) and in my opinion won a stupid prize. That's just one of a lot of examples.
@@HoneyChild-8if you really think that you need to open ur eyes outside of ur own world
But are they an “ally” to you as well?
Skin bleaching is huge in asia too and is in so many skin products 😢 my father made me use some when i was younger and it gave me such bad rosacea as i got older. Please be careful if you or anyone is messing with similar products, the skin issues are no joke.
I’m not sick. I’m going back to factory reset.
The girl is back.🤗
Whatever shade your skin is I promise you, your natural skin is soooo much prettier and radiant than the post-bleaching skin tone bleaching will leave you with.
This is so sad and reminds me of my own mom trying to "mold" my nose up until I was a teenager. It had become so normal to me and I didn't even know what the reason was behind it. It wasn't until my friend pointed it out to me that I realized what she was doing.
Stories like this just make me more proud of my dark skin tbh
Im a light skinned african, living in africa and i know kids right now who are darker in tone and they are already lowkey obsessed with skin colour, talking abot how ugly their skin is and how this or that kid is so light skinned and pretty. Its crazy how skin tone will never not be a topic
Blame the parents. The mothers who teach them and the fathers who invalidate their daughters’ beauty because of their Afrocentric features and skin tone. Blame the women who stay quiet because they’re a “safe” color, yet then complain about people being so insecure.
@@ft1725 Why’re we only blaming mothers and women? And why only bring up fathers when it comes to “a daughter’s beauty”? Skin colour should be entirely neutral, and so should the physical appearances nature gave you. Manmade beauty standards should be disregarded instead of enforced, if you really want to tackle the issue of colorism.
@@Angiologist36 I did not only blame the mothers. I absolutely talked about the fathers too. Man made beauty should be appreciated, but fundamentally speaking is not. Before people can get to neutrality, they must come to take responsibility for their obvious faults and address them.
Also the light skinned kids do think they are better than the darker skinned kids. First hand experience..light skinned women actually also make awful comments about dark skinned people
Good morning, afternoon, evening.
Story time.
I was in our neighborhood store when I noticed a little biracial girl who looked very sad.
Her mom said the girl was sad because she was dark and teased by the kids at school.
I immediately did what no one did for me.
I asked the cashier for his phone and asked the mom if the little girl could listen to the song I had picked. The song and video was " Brown Skin Girl".
I saw the mom a few weeks later and she told me her daughter listens to that song all day everyday and she is so much happier.
Sometimes God gives us the right moment to show love and understanding to others.
This is why I hate the idea that the color white is beautiful, pure, and good; while black is dangerous, dirty, and bad. People hold this same idea to skin tones and it’s sickening, growing up I use to hate being darker than my classmates or my family but today I love my skin tone. I think it’s beautiful. If you hate your skin it’s going to be hard to ever be happy. A lot of this hate will continue because people do not want to learn to love themselves for how they are and it’s sick, children need to feel loved especially by their parents! Not shame because they are dark.
Calling light skin "fair" by default is extremely problematic when you research the original definition of the word fair, and when we can see that the complete opposite of something that's called fair (which is dark skin), would by default be considered "ugly".
Fair meant "lovely" before Europeans in the Shakespearen Era decided to align that term with white, bright skin. There is nothing unfair about being a dark skinned woman or girl!
Im so grateful to my mother because even though i am the only dark skinned in my family, she still told me i was beautiful just in my own dark skin
I had a friend who was doing this in middle school. It always made me sad, she would tell me it’s a part of her and her mom’s skin care routine. She eventually stopped in high school thankfully
What’s daunting is the visible Afro Dominican mom pushing the fairer doll….its 😱
She would never see me or my baby again
Yeah, I would have showed her the door.
She hates how she looks FOR SURE !
This happened to my friends mom. This lady tricked her into buying soap and noticed her skin was turning different color 😢. She stopped using it
They will do anything but educate themselves.💔
To add to this, can we start bringing up our young sons and brothers to love their hair and skin texture from the home? Thank you. We need to off this from the inside out.
Agreed. But it will have to be a joint effort, a lot of black men think longer hair styles on them is “gay” or zesty. EXCEPT locs for some reason. They view short bald head as masculine which is why they in turn will masculinize darker skinned women when they have short hair and uplift long looser hair textures.
But I definitely agree we need to accept hair on boys too. Because aside from what I mentioned earlier, there is also a mindset that having long hair on them will make them a “thug” 🙄
A lot of these things stem from colonial history, they shaved the heads of the people they forcibly brought so as a means to strip them of their identity, to exert control etc, and other things.
@@ca678.4
The people they forcibly brought were/are West Africans. West African people aren’t dead but alive in millions. I need to reiterate bc people talk about West Africans like they are dead or something. It’s weird to listen to when people speak. Their blood is still alive.
When I was a young kid, maybe 6 or 7, my mom made me use bleaching cream from the beauty supply on my legs. I had impetigo at some point, so I had dark scars left on them. I questioned it even then, like why do you want me to bleach my skin? She said something along the lines of, oh it won’t do anything, it’ll just lighten the spots. Then one day she handed me the jar again and told me to “put a little on your face too”. Y’all, I had this complex about my skin and beauty for YEARS, because my dark skinned mother’s actions made it seem like my mid-toned complexion was wrong or ugly. I never felt that darker skin was undesirable, nor did I ever value lighter skin in a certain way.
She used to tell me to date “light skinned guys with good hair and pretty eyes” so she could have pretty grand babies one day; my preference was usually darker skinned guys and she hated it. I dated a mixed Puerto Rican guy for a while, she never met him, but you’d never know by how crazy she is to this day about him. It’s amazing how warped our parents can be.
This is common in India too and it look really unnatural as well
Never bleach your skin. Love the skin you're in.
I’m a Boomer and I never suggested bleaching to my daughter. Nor did my mom suggest it for any of us. We are all colors of the “spectrum” in our family. No one cares. Love the skin you’re in!❤
Worrying about if your baby is going to be lightskinned and taking supplements in pregnancy to makentheir kids lightskinned is INSANITY.
Colorism is really bad in Asian communities too. In some families, the members don’t even acknowledge each other because they’re not as light as them. And then growing up in black communities and with a black family, I was put down by people with darker skin who didn’t even know me and assumed I thought I was better than them because of my skin and never really fit with other light skin people because I didn’t share that same “I’m a queen because I’m light skin” mentality. I just hung around whoever I liked because of their personality period. I don’t see having any shade of skin as a privilege. Getting rewards because of something like your skin, not actually based off of your good will and merit is incredibly damaging to your ego and the mindsets of those around you. People who allow this end up thinking that they’re owed something just for existing and that’s so unhealthy. I feel like even with all of these still existing struggles, we are still moving towards a world where we won’t be having conversations about the negative views and values of skin color. We will have been on a large scale embraced everyone’s colors and shapes and learned to better appreciate and not just ourselves but each other. Doesn’t mean we all have to favor every single thing, but if someone’s skin shade bothers someone then something is incredibly wrong
You're so beautiful Tinta! Its sad that people are raised basically being told their ugly by default...natural is the most beautiful
Aaaw thank you 😊 I truly think all complexions are beautiful we just need to take care of our skin.
This Dominicans are freaking me out with these dolls.
I think the darker the skin the more beautiful it is.
I absolutely acknowledge the hierarchy in skin tone I never experienced the hate darker skin women deal with, I have always loved seeing a really dark skin brother or sister in all of their glory.
Colonization and systemic racism has f*cked the world up.
My father is a dark skin man and my mother is lighter I am a mixture of both, interesting enough my grandmother has two sons and two daughters both daughters were lighter and the sons are a dark redder hue, genetics is amazing and I love the diversity.
I’m dark skinned and used to have insecurities (when I call myself brown skinned ppl lighter than me say I’m dark skinned so l’ll just be dark skinned since that’s how the world seed me). Seeing ppl my skin tone like, Jayda Cheaves, and recognizing her as beautiful helped me unpack the internalized self hatred I had for myself. I had to cut this guy I was talking to off bc he told me “I prefer light skins but I like you” to my face as if I should be appreciative of him finding me beautiful enough to settle for my black 🍑 🤦🏾♀️
My high yellow cousins were always told not to stay out in the sun too long bc they’ll turn too black and I’m so grateful that wasn’t my experience. Every since I found out I am Nigerian in ancestry (96%) I have embraced my skin darkening in the summer. I find my Yoruba ppl beautiful w their rich skin and Afrocentric features. I understand where I get this skin from and am very proud now🫶🏾
9:25 The girl in the pink said she doesn't care what people say about her bleaching her skin but she cares and is hurt when they say something about her being dark 🤔..... So basically you're strong and defiant when they talk shit about you bleaching but you're weak and feeble with no self-confidence when they say you're dark!
If you're going to make excuses about being ashamed of being black at least make it make sense!
It did make sense. She chose to bleach her skin so that is a decision she can stand behind and defend. In her eyes she did not choose her dark skin, it is a "flaw" that she was bullied for and people called her ugly so obviously she wouldn't react well. It's like when people call little boys weak and they end up growing up with little man syndrome or something.
@@justasnail885 lol.. Excellent explanation!! You're right!
@@justasnail885🎯🎯🎯🎯🔥
I am a dark sista. Yes when I was younger I remember wishing I had more Caucasian features, specifically hair. I remember I even secretly trying to bleach my skin with baking soda and something I saw somewhere. Fast forward to 27 I love every single thing about me; growing up is beautiful. Especially with social media, it has helped heal a lot of us. Idc about the sun and getting darker, every day during the summer I am outside running and getting a dark tan.
I have a 2yr old and my mother tried telling her we’re going to visit her “cute white cousin”. The “white baby who is soo cute”. I shut that ish down immediately. Ofcourse my mother being the deeply traditional African woman she is she just got offended and dismissively argued with me.
The black youth has done an amazing job using social media to spread self love, admiration, and desire. REPRESENTATION matters.
My mom has gooooorgeous deep cocoa skin and it's always been so velvety and beautiful. She never once bleached or used anything to enhance the color of her skin. I'm much much fairer than she is but still very much brown skinned. I've never ever felt pressure to be "yellowbone" or whatever because she taught me to be content in the tone I'm in. I've never felt even tempted to lighten my skin and I'm so grateful to have a mother like her❤
My mother still shames my childrens skin tone as they grow older its getting darker and she struggles with loving my kids because of their skin color.
This is sad and also a terrible situation to be in . I'm imagining you love both your mum and kids, and you want her to be a part of your kids life, but it can be terrible for your kids self esteem. Hope you're having these conversations with her and the kids. And hopefully it gets better.
Your children are your priority. For their self esteem, you need to keep them away from your mother. Her love should be unconditional.
Thank you sooo much for showing this!!! It’s hardcore in today’s Black culture. Dominican women are highlighted but not the history of the killing and separation of Haitians or how they literally whitewashed the pics of their leaders! It’s as bad and effective as our southern grandparents bringing their colorist views. IT’S KRAZY HOW EFFECTIVE IT WAS AND IS….. BUT THANK GOD FOR HOPE AND CHANGE‼️
I think bleaching is horrible. Every time i go to Jamaica i keep seeing ghost faces and it bothers my core
Honesty I would snatch my baby out of her arms, I come from a very mixed family we come in so many different shades. But the one thing we always been taught is to be proud of our skin color it's something that we inherited from our ancestors. That deep rich color is one of the most beautifulest most long-living colors in this world when it comes to skin tone, no one should ever be made to be ashamed of it. We are some of the most adaptable and resistant people in this world hell no. Me and Grandma would have to have a serious talk and she would not be around my baby because she let that go. Self hatred is One thing to have but to have it put on you from your family especially those who you would look up to is a horrible fate 😢
I grew up experiencing colourism and it was perpetuated in both media and within the black community. It felt at times, that me loving myself as a dark skin women was considered radical.
Im glad I never once considered bleaching.
Keep your kids away from these people! They can't truly love your kids if they aint loving themselves
I can’t believe people like that exist honestly 😂 if I knew someone that bleaches I would never talk to them again that’s weird as hell
but Do you still talk to people who make disparaging comments about dark skin people?
You're the weird one
You're kinda cruel for saying that. People who bleach their skin are victims of colourism. No need to treat them harshly, its better to help them.
@@racheljones4561he never answered the question guy lol smh
Absolutely breaks my heart seeing this. Blessed to have had a mother that poured into to me. I think we all go through struggles of finding self love as young girls. But you’re meant to grow out of it through the support of those around you. These girls didn’t have that or the external voices ( media, boys, the world) were louder and stronger than their own families/loved ones. So sad. I truly think Black woman are so beautiful and it’s nothing but lies and envy put on us. People are risking cancer…cancer due to this BS. If I was that daughter with the doll, that would be the last time grandma saw the child until she changed her behaviour. You have to protect your babies.
Thank you for adding practical tips to help moving past the issue. Critique is one thing, but I think your video actually helps.
I am a product of self-hate from a dark-skinned beautiful woman. She was teased relentless as a child and was the darkest one in her adopted family. She got with the light skin men and me and my siblings were produced. I never knew there was a difference between my skin and her skin until I was about eight or nine. My ex-husband has one light skin son and two dark skin sons. He is dark. Together we also had a light-skinned son in a dark-skinned son. Same parents two different shades. I teach all of my children to love themselves because I know how hard it is to be black. Even the colorism within our own people is astounding to me. The very system that suppresses us, is also perpetrated and perpetuated by us. My light skin son has all of the African features including 4C hair, and he was told that he's not black. My dark son was teased about his skin color. They have the same mother and father. He was called so many racial slurs in the 6th grade. You cannot judge a book by its cover. Black comes in so many shades, matter of fact it's nothing more than a social construct that gives white people privileges. So why in the hell are we even perpetuating this nonsense?? I personally think dark-skinned people are the most beautiful, I teach all of my children to love themselves, even my dark-skinned child I know what he goes through, we talked and I encouraged him to loved himself.
The doll video made my heart heart 😢 beautiful baby
Right just love yourself and how God made you
Wow the colorism is so horrible.
In a world that already beats us down as is, it’s sad asf that ppl within our own families have to be some of the loudest wrong voices when it comes to it. The self hate is insane
It's really so sad, and it's like there's no safe spaces.
The woman at 6:23 is so beutufull. Her skin is georgus ❤
The self hate is painful 😢
The crazy part about it is the doll is the same color as the grandma it’s definitely giving self hate 🤣
YES "BRAINWASHED" THAT IS THE WORD😭😭😭SO PAINFUL
Thank you for highlighting this about bleaching
Wow. This is fascinating and horrifying at the same time.
The gag is darker people will age way better than lighter/non BP.
There are many from the more senior generation that experienced the same things & do not adhere to bleaching AT ALL❤
I was brown and my step mom encouraged me to use an EXPIRED carol white cream....out of jalousie I am glad I was smart as a teenager to know something felt wrong and I said no
this is CHILD abuse if you do this to your child!
1:54 THANK YOU FOR TALKING ABOUT ONE OF THESE DICTATORS IN CARIBE!!. it was not just in cuba yall. its all over caribe. viva la revolución ✌️
as a PALLEEEEE person, i am so in awe of dark skin; it's so ethereal and gorgeous! God Bless!
That Dominican grandmother got some nerve…
I have seen and heard about light skin women that get impregnated by Black men and then are unhappy with their child's skin color and then when a dark skin women get impregnated by light skin man then they are jealous it's really sad in this generation . We all need to love our skin color it's beautiful it doesn't matter the shade. Black is also beautiful
That is sad all over. I wish ppl could wake up from the brainwashing and realize that societal pressure and comments from self hating ppl especially self hating black men should not matter. But easier said than done. Too many stupid black males are colorist and featurist and this society has so many underhanded reasons (example the whitewashing of Egypt and the Bible) to push this agenda that is a major reason for the continuation of this madness. We are taught to devalue the features of the ancient ppl who made up the Bible.
This is a social conditioning issue.
Media is a tool that subconsciously wires us to see and interact in the world in a specific way. It teaches us to tolerate and accept exploitative practices.
Colorism teaches us to accept and tolerate racial prejudices.
Dealing with discrimination starts with questioning preferences and social norms.
Im Nigerian & the Genz, are also obsessed with skin bleaching because their favorite influencers & celebrities are all skin bleaching
I love my dark skin!I'm fearfully and wonderfully made according to Ps 139:14 kjv
I may not ever truly understand how it feels, but this is so completely bizarre and dystopian to see. I can’t even fathom how horrible it must be to have your parents shame you for being the same skin color as them or for being comfortable and happy with your own skin. I’m so sorry for anyone who’s had to deal with that and I wish you all the best 😢