Reduce the educational gap between boys and men compared to Girls and Women. Doing nothing about this situation is not working. Displaying indifference is not acceptable.
Men and boys know that college costs more than their potential future income. As such, it isn't worth doing. Likewise, if I never marry or have kids, I can get by on a lot less.
The problem with polygamous society is that the men who have the resources to monopolize hundreds of women for themselves require other men to provide the resources to the guy. No guy can acquire all that wealth by himself, he needs a system of working men that work for him. If these guys get nothing out of serving a leader that takes all their wealth, there is no reason to serve in that society.
Men also have an odd habit of developing intense loyalty in hierarchies. Trump for example is extremely popular among men and he is promising things. Men look the other way when he fucks outside of his marriage. Men are definitely still susceptible to this kind of thing.
Some czech man made video on facebook he said men are so weak, Men are crying about women´s attitude, men are crying also about kids misbehaving Men got it wrong, Men got it backwards If women sees men crying and complaining about everybody about women anda bout kids she is no longer respecting him she becomes lonelly woman taking care of kids, and kids start to misbehave So if Men would do it backwards ands start to be responsible men instead of crying and complaining the wives would respect the men more and children would be happier. He said women are stratring to wake up but men dont much.
The fact that Tom's videos tends to get Way more views is proof people don't want to accept the fact that this topic is crucial, don't want to address men's needs, and the narrative of male dominance/the Patriarchy are just being held together by words, rhetoric & today's fictitious culture.
People would rather create a boogie man to blame because it means they will never have to take responsibility for their own actions, failures, personality etc. The problem with the boogieman is that its so vague and has no proof of existence that they can use it as a way to always avoid accountability.
I came here from someone’s TikTok. OMG!!! What a resource! Every video! This one in particular has to have millions of views!!! I want to translate it in Ukrainian! I am sending it to ALL my close friends. Especially men. Thank you!
I really appreciate these male-centered conversations Tom! So vital and few people have the courage to bring these up. In the work environment lately I’ve noticed women backing women, just to spite a lot of men. And God forbid you bring that up or even mention it, you’re done. For me, the best idea always wins no matter the age, race, or gender. But that hasn’t been the case in a lot of roles. Especially in the advertising and marketing business I’ve worked in the last 15 years.
Needs more about OLDER guys too. This issue is GENERATIONS old now. It's just now the numbers are catastrophic enough for the Luxury Beliefs crew to realize it will affect THEIR futures. SLIGHTLY.
Yeah. Women don't need men but my ex-wife who had an affair and then married the doctor she had it with is still more than happy to keep taking my check every month.
The suicide comment was interesting to me. I'm a male who had strong suicidal thoughts since early elementary school. I viewed myself with the same words, useless and worthless. I made 3-4 weak attempts at suicide in those early years. In order to gain some level of self respect, I had to channel that "aggression" into improving myself. I'm lucky it paid off. My attempt to swim to fatigue as a way to drown, and run until my asthma overcame me, ended up making me a good athlete. I've continued to push aggression and "purposefulness" for over a decade, pushing through multiple failures as I finally acquire a respectable college degree. Every time my successes are challenged, I have the natural mindset that I will work to success or to death. My listed achievement are a false representation of my wellbeing. In my mind, as soon as I find an obstacle I cannot overcome, I am no longer a functional-enough human that deserves to represent our species. I don't think death is a fair consequence anymore now that I have a job, but I can't shake the magnitude my responsibilities off my mind. Failure hurts. Trying again doesn't come without a cost. I'm almost certain I will die early from stress related disease or suicide. I just hope I do something useful before that happens. I have personally found that men are more likely to care about the wellbeing of a large group of people, while women focus more on the few people closest to themselves. Everyone says we should end war, but few people put in any effort with the intention of contributing to global human wellness. If I could find just a single woman who actually takes action to help people on a global scale, I just might consider marriage in my life.
there are plenty of women interested in and working on improving the world. making generalisations and having negative expectations of any group, will mean you don't see the opposite of what you want to believe. What you see in the world won't change until you change your mind, which I doubt you will, but just know that you are the one projecting your expectations on others. I would highly recommend finding a good and affordable therapist to work through some of your hangups, if you want to make any progress. You seem to have some common cognitive distortions, which are making your life harder than it needs to be. I say this as someone that was chronically depressed for 20+ of my life, since childhood, and someone that had massive anger towards the world and the opposite gender. you have to change your outlook, and allow yourself to see good in yourself and others, if you want anything to be different. I wish you good luck.
I think it all comes down to personal philosophy. We currently live in an age of intense envy. Everyone looking at everyone else and going "I want what they got!" We define success as a state of perpetual conspicuous consumption. It's a con job to keep people in debt and always chasing after fantasies that leave them anxious and depressed so they'll buy anything that might offer a glimmer of false hope. If you don't buy into all that, life gets a hell of a lot easier. A basic fact of life is that only a handful will ever be rich. Most are, will be, and always have been, working class. So just find success in being the best working class you can be, because the con won't work if you're not greedy.
Humans are just selfish by nature. Look at Cain & Abel. I mean, look at God. He says he is a jealous God. So by design were f'ed. Just live your life to its fulfilment and try not to get caught up in rationalizing things that won't ever change.
Yeah you modern ladies are basically children all the way through. Zero understanding of men or the world around you. Your lives are nerfed all the way through.
I also love the sublte misandry here. Both of these men point out dozens of things women have and do that is positive traits that are UNIQUE TO WOMEN. Yet all of the traits that are unique to men we point to here are NEGATIVE traits. They literally do this all the time.
They're trying to make sure they aren't called misogynistic. And they have listed positive traits of masculinity. Heck, Richard Reeves said his wife complained he wasn't being masculine enough.
How many girls get told “girl power” and “you go girl” and how many boys hear the equivalent growing up? And through their teens? And as adults? Just a thought
While simultaneously hearing society and women say I don't need a man, men are trash, getting divorced raped, men are the cause of all the problems in the world, etc.
Also the whole "black power" movement, lmao. Imagine if there were a "white power" movement lmao. For the record I think some of the black empowerment movement is good, like the valuing financial literacy part, it's just this isn't really mainstream, most of the mainstream stuff is just racist anti white propaganda.
30min into the pod they say a woman wrote a book asking if we needed men. The last time I took my car to a mechanic a man fixed it. The people doing my lawn care are men the person who came and hooked up my internet when I moved in my house was a man. The people working over night fixing the roads I see are all men. Asking if we need men today is a slap in the face to all men. If all men disappeared overnight society would crumble
I'm a woman and I agree. Also, I'm a 50-year-old woman going through menopause and I wish women would talk more about what we go through during menopause. I'm so glad I'm out of the workforce the last few years because I don't know how women even stay in the workforce at my age. Menopause does a number on our bodies and how we feel overall. So I'm probably the rare woman who actually thinks that we should be taking care of things at home while men are bringing in the income. Or more women actually do think this way but don't want to say it out loud.
The inventions, information and labor that allowed feminism to flourish could not have existed without the ingenuity of men. Any talk of parity between the sexes could only exist because an infrastructure was put in place that nullified the natural advantages that men have over women. This modern infrastructure is the product of mostly male effort and innovation.
@@notch76 It's insane, this discussion does nothing besides driving a wedge between men and women. The statement "are men needed" or anything of the like should be treated as it is hate and misandry. Just as the opposite is misogony.
@@SquarishLink 100% agree! Emasculation and misandry has been effectively integrated into western culture. It's a complete slap in the face then they wonder why young men lack the motivation to achieve.
Most of those statistics are made up by a right wing media personality. What kids need is stability. That is easier with a two parent house hold. The key is two parents. It doesn't have to be man. It is the stability that children crave. Crave may be the wrong word. For them to be whole they need stability. The father meme was made up to frightened people about lesbian couples raising boys. The problem is the stats on that prove the anti lesbian thing was completely wrong.
No. Women now have greatly increased access to the finances and labour of men without giving the hitherto expected things in return - companionship, support, happy family life. A woman can discard her man at will and the courts will give her half of his assets and put him in indentured servitude to her for the rest of his life. Meanwhile, the man receives nothing in return: no female companionship, no family life, no real relationship with his own children. Men aren't stupid and can see this is a terrible deal. But in the absence of that age-old partnership between man and wife, it's difficult for men to find a role and purpose in life, hence all the problems.
Women want an equal partner and companionship with their husbands. Men just want a sex slave, a mommy and a maid. Woman listen to the way men talk about us, their wives specifically. Men don't even seem to like women, not even their wives. It's pretty heart-breaking.
The sad thing is how no one seems to care about these men which makes it even more devastating to the ones that are affected. In fact not only is there no sympathy, people go out of their way to berate and put them down. Keep in mind however that we live in democracies and it will have more and more of a political impact as more of these men emerge. How we handle this is going to be extremely important to the future of humanity. If you think politics have been bad over the last decade that was just the beginning.
You've seen a drop in violent behavior because of p*rn and video games that drop will reverse as more men like me become disinterested in both and instead get interested in this, these are my observations but i think sedation is over, this Incel movement the Pills the suppositories whatever they are, are the result of this, they are waking up.
The battle of the sexes has been going on for a long time. And men in this nation have grown weary of the fight. Since women have decided to bad mouth their mates, the male children avoid marriage like it's the plague. This has really escalated in the last ten years or so. Young men don't think they need the headache any longer. It's hard for most males to be attracted to vicious females. I could understand this if they had been divorced, but many of the young girls today that have never been married. It's easier just check out of the dating game than to try to appease a woman these days.
@@jameslee-dp6cb I have always thought that one of the conditions of a divorce should be a written agreement that neither the man or woman will defame (bad mouth) the other in front of the children. It is devastating to the psychology of the child.
@@jameslee-dp6cb The problem with men these days has nothing to do with women. Men aren't present in their children's lives because of their own choices. The men are choosing to not be present. Men need to start supporting each other and their children if they want to make any changes and stop blaming women, who really have nothing to do with the problem.
Wowww fabulous discussion! I have been watching lots of Richard Reeves's interview and you really brought a new side to the discussion with your questions!
I wouldnt put my hands in the fire for it. probably not, but we never know, culture changes and shifts all the time, and cultures get replaced all the time historically. We just assuming it is ours is the better one, or that is ours that going to do the replacing, and become dominant... we actually dont know that.
I am unsure about this with aggressiveness. Men express it more physically and that is a more noticeable aggressiveness. Women express aggressiveness differently, less noticeable but it exist
I haven't watched the video yet, however I'm VERY surprised about the comment section, it's unexpectedly peaceful and mindful. My surprise about this also speaks for itself, I guess. 😅
@Ny W I'd love to hear your description of how patriarchy flooded the world with unnecessary men; kinda sounds like a total refutation of biology to me; maybe a reverse China one child policy will sort it - you know, male infanticide. Looking forward to your response ........
Truth is, men around the world have succeeded at their role so much that they almost don't even have to do it anymore. When you can build a society where the average citizen has no need to concern themselves with a broad takeover or mass proliferate of violence, yeah women do fine on their own. It really was that, to act as that wall or barrier between the dangerous outside world and your family. That is what men were, for the longest time, that included work. Now that society has progressed past that need, the thing men literally evolved to do, isn't immediately super important.
23:22 is where I start parting ways with Reeves. There is an abyss between "having a society that makes men feel obsolete" and having a society that made men obsolete. The background of the later one is plagued with exactly what created this existential resentment in men today: we were tools used to build a world that would set us aside at first chance. Anyone that has been paying close and honest attention to these conversations since 2014 is extremely likely to agree. I think that's why the collapse of society has specifically become prevalent in the imaginations of conservative men. That's the way they are rationalizing their resentment. Edit: On the whole "everyone stop so I can lead". They are very clearly speaking in the same terms as Jordan Peterson and the non-moronic men of the Manosphere. This is terrifying because all they are doing is saying the same things in the most politically correct way possible. They are making subliminal accusations and are generating weird ideas. For example: Reeves says there is no need to stop male agency in order to empower female agency, but that is exactly how things happened. If it isn't necessary, why did it happen that way? Are all these Camille Paglia and Janice Fiamengo type of characters on the spot when they say feminism is plagued by a pathological hate for men? If that's not the case, dudes like Reeves need to explain why things happened the way the have and make a point to save feminism from this verdict. It's hard to not make this connection.
Liberating women… Now a woman HAS to work for the average family to afford the same average lifestyle of the past. And no, I’m not seeing average young women or men being single and happily financially secure. So many are up to their eyeballs in debt, own nothing, and are living paycheck to paycheck with roommates or at home. So even though women can get their own check, it’s on average not enough to afford a legitimately comfortable lifestyle. Everything has increased in cost to negate their paycheck and has increased the pressure on both single men and women to afford things that are now priced according to the new norm that families now are expected to have both the man and woman working. I am not against women working, but the way it’s come about, and the result, isn’t what I call a liberation. I feel like women now have merely inherited the same burden as men have bore for centuries, which is this expectation that they are to grow up and work just the same.
Your entire reply is based on establishment indoctrination. The system programs everyone to be system slaves. The few that rebel and find their own way are the ones who are happiest and enjoy the most success. The vast majority simply go along with the herd because it is easier and they are heavily programmed to comply & conform. Any guy can self generate the income he needs to live the life he wants- if he has the courage to get started and is ready to put in the work. The guys that choose the "easy" path end up miserable, broke and without freedom or options.
@@jfaustin1742 That's the problem. Too many women want what you got instead of a family. But most women and men would be much happier in a successful relationship and family. But instead it's like everyone just lives and dies alone now. As a man who has always wanted a family and had one in the past this is very upsetting and challenging to even find a partner with all these collage educated masculine women out here today. Those in long term relationships also tend to live healthier and longer God help us. 🙏
Everyone has their struggles in life. The issue i see and experience is if you're straight white male your voice is suppressed, it's not just a male thing. I see it in the workplace all the time and suicide numbers reflect men's struggles and how they struggle to find a voice. This doesn't mean other groups don't have challenges but this one is just swept under the carpet because men apparently have an advantage and have it easy. It's not easy like it's made out to be, everyone has problems.
today's narrative in western countries is 1) anti white racist 2) misandric. It's specifically against what you wrote: "straight white males." That's the reality.
Nobody cares about us men so we learn to take care of ourselves and often love and die alone unfortunately. This is Not what God intended when he created a woman. 🙏 God help us so that men and women can once again connect all of them as you intended. Men and women need each other that's how we're created. Yin and yang ☯️
I'm a decade older than a half century who has had many jobs, and professional roles, and have never experienced what you are talking about. The most repression I've experienced in my life has been at the hands of toxic alpha males, every single time.
Why do we respect women's choices to earn or stay home? Yet, we do not respect men's choices to work or stay home? We have a very limited, archaic and stereotyped view of men that pigeonholes men into being some superman 24:53
Women, for the most part, have hypergamous aspirations. They prefer to marry or partner with men who have equal or better educational attainment and income relative to themselves. They reject men, for the most part, who score below them in these areas. So it behooves women to root for the success of men because if men continue on this path, women will find fewer and fewer of them suitable for long term relationships. The end result is not only an epidemic of loneliness for men, but an epidemic of loneliness for women as well. Additionally, with a smaller dating pool, the shrinking number of men who meet this hypergamous standard will be able to date multiple women and women will have to be content with sharing a guy. Essentially, what you will see if this trajectory continues is the modern revival of harems or polygamy.
Sharing? That word implies ownership. And I refuse to ascribe to the idea of owning my partner. I see my partner as a human, with needs and wants that at times might be removed from my needs and wants and here is where agency comes into play.
"it is so gross to say slow down so i can lead" Tom Bilyeu I totally agree. "It is infinitely more gross that women are fundamentally incapable of loving a man the way he thinks he should be loved by a woman" Me
The only thing missing is the blue hair. 😞. This is the most depressing conversation I've heard yet. "Where have all the men gone?" only means anything when the electricity stops. This is just a self-deletion buffet.
I reject this “taking the brakes off” characterization vehemently. First, what held women back was cultural - meaning it was men and women not encouraging their daughters to pursue careers. Today’s society has completely tilted in favor of women. It’s parents, it’s K-12 educators, it’s academia, it’s tax law, it’s family court, it’s homeless shelters and social programs, it’s food stamps, it’s our media landscape, it’s advertising, it’s corporate HR, it’s entertainment, it’s sports, it’s our military. Our entire civilization is riven with female encouragement and preference today. I was going to buy and read this guy’s book, but after listening to this interview, I realized that his views are not part of the solution. He’s just making the book promotion tour annd has to seem more evenly balanced. The problem today isn’t evenly balanced. I’m waiting for somebody to report the way things really are, but nobody puts it all together accurately. Because, after all, women read more books.
Women weren't allowed to go to Harvard untill the 1960s. Women weren't allowed to have bank accounts or get loans till the 1960s. Women weren't allowed to go to the doctors on their own untill the 1960s. Schools for these reasons would gear women to become house ornaments from a young age as they'd need to be truly exceptional to make it in a world that had laws making it hard for them to be independent. Now we have equality law where women have the same life opportunities as men. Teachers now see value in giving girls the same time and resource as boys. That's what they mean by taking off the breaks.
@@steph6109 No, schools give girls MORE time and resource. That’s why they get better grades, despite IQ parity. Boys are persona non grata in public schools, easily slipping through the cracks of a system laser-focused on girls. Girls get more scholarships, college degrees and tax breaks on starting businesses. It’s why boys struggle in reading and writing, and account for the vast majority of high school dropouts, suicides, criminal behavior and homelessness. And the vast majority of shelters are for women. It’s astonishing how young people use their distorted views of history to justify excesses of the present. But next time you try it, be sure you aren’t talking to someone who lived through those times. “Not allowed” by whom? My mother had a career in the mid-1940s and, magically, managed to drive to the doctor by herself without ending up in jail. The point you’re making I actually agree with - always have. Everybody should have equal opportunity to succeed in this country. But that’s not what we have now. Remember that for every person who is given a preference, someone else is denied basic equality.
@@graymatters7584 Girls have better grades because they spend more time studying and doing their homework. Girls raised their hands more to ask questions and ask teachers for help more if they struggle because unlike boys, they have no fear of apparent weakness. That is the reason why girls perform better at school, as well as girls being more mature in the school years. This is not a systematic oppression like men were doing to women in the past at all, not even remotely close.
23:20 Maybe that is because women, society and the media is calling them that all the time 24/7 and blame them for everything? And maybe that is why they checked out from society and are now in games instead where they are not contantly blamed, put down, accused of things they did not do and cannot help, called names and harassed.
I’ll never understand this framing. Who has it worse, one group of 4 billion human beings who happen to be female, or one group of 4 billion human beings who happen to be male? How can you lump 4 billion people into a single generalised group?
How many guys want a wife that goes toe to toe with them? There's the problem. Men think they're supposed to be in control and they freak out when they're wife doesn't let them.
@@knightheaven8992 That is not what I mean. I mean you want to do something and you have to convince her not tell her. Most guys are too sensitive to convince. They need a passive woman that they can control. It seems like a boring life.
@@mikeoveli1028 Maybe when feminism is gone and stops turning women into caricature of men they invented maybe then we can have negotiations but as it stands these anti-social, promiscuous, angry, defiant contumacious, narcissistic/borderline psychopathic women are not interested in that.
Thanks for talking about it men are alone and we have to fight to get back on track and be able to be active and good parts of society, but as of now we have to work together and most of the times lonely but it is okay if it is this way believe most of us are on the same page and in the end you are not alone.
Something I've noticed, as someone who finished college at 36. College grads tend (like these men) to see college as an essential step to full adulthood and decent earnings. Those ideas are not true. Oil riggers, truck drivers, plumbers, electricians and carpenters (among others) earn far above the median income. None require college. Women today expect their men to earn more than the women do. In recent polls, 1.5 times as much. When most women weren't working, this was not an issue. Now that more women graduate from college, fewer men will fit that criterion alone. College graduates also expect potential mates to be white collar, so those wealthy plumbers and oil riggers can forget it. Another interesting thing is, most women now also expect men to be over 6 feet tall. Last I checked, that was only about 15% of all men. If you combine all these standards, we end up somewhat less than 5% of the men that women even would consider. That's without even thinking about any emotional connections. Add to that, over 70% of American women are overweight or obese. 40% of all children are born to unwed mothers. 28 is the average age of first marriage for American women and initial loss of virginity is before 18, which implies around 10+ years (on average) of promiscuous behsvior. Studies say women admit to 6 lifetime sex partners on average (which probably means 18 in reality). Thus: About 1 in 20 men is acceptable to most women. About 1 in between 3 and 10 women is acceptable to most men. Result: most men realize that women really don't want them and odds are, even if they did, the women would probably cheat and eventually divorce them and take everything they had. A little math shows that college is expensive. It might eventually pay for itself, but there are no guarantees. More math shows that a single man can get by with far less than a single woman can and much less than a married couple can, not to mention kids. So, even if I earn half what I could as a college graduate, I still can end up with more at the end of the day than a typical married college professor. Without the nagging. And everything I have is MINE.
Anyone that says "slow down so I can lead" does not understand optimization. Leaders should be chosen organically, by just the nature of the fact that the person who does it best is the person who leads.
Sure, but that organic process is a battle, & those that say this are battling to get there too, using whatever power levers they have - leadership is politics, otherwise the brutes would lead; one needs supporters to lead, & to sustain them to continue to lead .. ie politics. In social higher animals leadership is politics.
And as for optimisation .. that's a theoretical economic concept, useful as a thinking or verbal tool, not so much as a descriptor of nature. Is it optimal for the giraffes vagus nerve to be 10 M long? No; it just happens that in fish that nerve goes under the aorta .. natural systems make do with what they start with; & they don't make the best, they make something that works well enough to get through the day, then the next day; over time that creates what looks optimal, but time is a bitch, things change .. anaerobes optimised, until algae, dinosaurs, until .. boom, ... Nature is more of a shotgun than a sniper.
With regards to the earnings disparity between certain types of vocation: it's not a question of whether society deems care work to be 'valuable' or not, it just comes down to basic principles of supply and demand. Let's be honest, there's far fewer highly-skilled mechanical engineers out there than there are people who either naturally lean towards it or can be trained to be care workers, and thus the former commands a far higher salary.
Spot on bro. This also applies to something like music. Engineers, nurses, and doctors are infinitely more valuable than rappers lol but music artists have a massive audience/demographic and selling a product scales better than selling a service; Just by the structure and the nature of their business, their earning potential is greater. As you said, it's not a matter of the work being valuable or not. It's not that simple.
Rule of thumb is to stop listening to people once they equate feminism with good because at that point we have removed ourselves from observable objective reality and entered into narcissistic dream world of fantasies and delusions.
Even so, there is such a thing as pricing yourself out of the market. And many businesses did that in 2022. I think we may be headed for depression. Farmers watch out, females will have you in their sights. They know that food is the basis on which we get our energy, they already have all the money.😆
Bullshit. If "mens earning potential" were a proxy for having your shit together, then a lifetime cashier at Walmart would be considered as attractive as a professional. The missing component is social status.
Lifetime job that can be replaced by simple robot is not an achievement. Status doesn't matter much to women but your ability to get what you want out of life, to learn, to innovate, to multitask and work together for a common goal....
this discussion is hilarious, most of the time richard is stating that "women don't need men" anymore. I mean i guess they don't given modern feminism and the hate i see online from the opposite sex seems like that is the message. but with rates of happiness going down for women on average, and the need of women from men for a purpose wouldnt it be better for the sexes to gettogether? instead of constantly being at eachothers throats and looking at one another as mere disposable commodities.
He is saying that, that modern society does now provide most of what older society's needed men for, with the exception of the male input in child rearing - the state can't do that very well. What he is saying is that culture must evolve to deal with the fact that men are not as necessary as they once were, that this is one of the key roles of culture, but that the politicization of this cultural evolution as a war is a dangerous thing, bc it is blocking the evolution of positive solutions for the dispirited male problem. If one does the math, it's pretty easy to show that without the male contribution to making stuff, keeping stuff working & paying taxes, a very large portion of the welfare state which makes men superfluous, would rapidly eat the economy. The superfluous male concept is a very very narrow analysis, it's the type of total bs that highly educated & powerful women might propose. How in any way can it be taken seriously? This bs anti male culture just needs to take a reality pill, to see what is real & stop trashing the male contribution. It's still there, it's just being trashed bc women think they have to defeat men to get a fair shot; a not unreasonable idea, given the resistance to them getting a fair shot. That defeating men is not a good strategy, if it also demoralises & kills our sons, is becoming apparent. That will drive cultural change, if it is allowed to occur. This is why the culture war needs to be seen to be very dangerous if the politicians are allowed to weaponise it. But it is a war, in the sense that positive definitions of progress must be hashed out; and a bunch of issues are being thrown into this hot pot, not least of which is broad dissatisfaction with the power balance - between capital & labor, which equates to income & educational disparity, hence the attack on institutions, on elites etc; these are just proxies of power. This is what tRump & De Santis have figured out & weaponised; that 'the status quo is just not fair' is a powerful feeling in society, hence a political force that can be harnessed; trumps whining can be reduced to - "It's just not fair to we little ppl" - see how he strives to make the threat about everyone, not just him, that's to disguise that he's not one of them, but represents them. In this sense the far left is on the same team, fighting the same battle, using the same tactics; they battle powerlessness too, & trash anything that represents the forces they see as responsible for that - racism sexism, homophobia, patriarchy etc. The battle is about a fair share of the spoils of success. In the past, after a battle, there'd be booty - the spoils of war; if powerful groups that helped win the battle didn't get a fair share of the spoils .. if they were will armed & organised they threatened havoc, & got their share; new conflicts erupted as powerful groups disputed the sharing formula. Globalisation is the bogey man - why? Because it's delivered great wealth to some & deprived millions of the decent life they had before. It's that simple. It is about power, the power to get a fair share of the spoils of success. And the wise old model of 'share lest there be revolution' seems unlearned.
Yeah the plot twist of all of this, is that women do need men, and men do also need other men, and i was going to say society... but not really it is more like Civilization itself needs men. Either men are doing the mad max thing or just retreating, the end result is similar.
Women don't need men's WILLING, VOLUNTARY contributions, because they can take what they need with the force of the state. Studies show that because men pay the majority of income tax, and women receive the majority of government benefits, the average man transfers $100,000 to the average woman over his life time in place like New Zealand and America.
I see it different, humanity is struggling not depending on sexe or age. When you focus you see the hard pattern of polarisatie all over the world. It is the matrix that is pushing people to choose a side rather the to focus on global issues as human beings combined. When you set limits on 1:1 people will automatically loose focus on the Bigger picture. It is a global strategy
I see many dating profiles that say if you support Trump don't message me or if your republican we won't get along. I mean c'mon we can't create a family because you believe in the Biden Regime? That's not really a person I'm willing to date if they are that selfish. It's almost as bad as the list most women have today that keeps them single and alone. We need to go back to just going out on a date with no expectations just two going out to have fun. But now most men never even get the first date because of the crappy men she chose before you now you will never get a shot. 🙄 .
Before recently, the idea of people being happily not married was ludicrous. Women especially, a significant percentage, adopt the ideology of, I can make a life without a man.
I’m only 25 minutes in but so far no mention that just because a man is not the only breadwinner and women are not economically dependent on men, doesn’t mean a man’s contribution to the family’s finances doesn’t drastically change the overall situation. Even if it’s less. If I make 80k and my husband makes 60k, that’s a huge contribution that totally changes a lifestyle. Just saying.
One can say the same about the husband being very strong, say a senior police officer but wife being stronger, say a commando or a marine. Husband is still contributing in making his family, community and country strong. His wife might be more qualified as a protector but he still is also very qualified, even if less than his wife. One can also say the same if husband is very powerful, a mayor of a state's capital and wife being more powerful, say the governor of that state. Husband is less powerful than his wife but still contributes in making his family very powerful and reputed. And in finances too, if husband earns well, he contributes to his family's finances even if he earns far less than his wife. His wife might be more qualified as a provider but he still is also very qualified, even if less than his wife. Yes but you, the wife, would still be the primary provider and he would only be a secondary also contributed. And if this bothers him as a man, it's not wrong, rather desirable. It's wrong only if he wants to bring you down so that he can disillusion himself and others that he is the primary provider. In certain contexts and on certain occasions, even a mouse can protect a lion. But largely only a lion has the competence of being a protector of a mouse (intent aside) and not vice versa. The stronger one is the protector and the weaker one is under protection. Similarly the one who earns more is the provider and the one who earns less is the provided for, at least in relative terms (even if standalone and in isolation that earning is good enough to provide). Agree that 60K is also a contribution but so is $0, since one can contribute in household in non-economic ways. Manhood or masculinity is not an absolute switch bulb attribute but a relative term. To be a husband and not just a life partner or spouse, the husband to qualify as a husband, needs to be more competent in the masculine or manly role than at least his wife, the manly role being of provider and protector. So to be a spouse, being a good human being, being loving and caring, contribute in some way is good enough. But to qualify as a wife, one needs to be better than her husband in homemaking and housekeeping. And to qualify as a husband, one needs to be better than his wife in providing and protecting. If not, the man becomes the wife and the woman becomes the husband. And it should hurt a man to not qualify as a husband. A man being fine with just being a spouse or being a wife and not a husband, is a man without any male ego and masculine pride. Now am I saying that in such a situation, the man should turn bitter and resent the wife's success, try to keep her back, or expect the wife to stroke his ego by voluntarily bringing herself down, so he appears as a qualified husband to the world? Or be insecure that his wife would leave him for someone better? Absolutely no! That would be becoming a bad spouse in pursuit of being a husband and becoming inhuman in pursuit of being a man. Moreover, receiving something one is not qualified for as a favour like a father deliberately losing to their kids to make them feel better, is something no self-respecting adult would like. So what do I recommend to men? It's simple. Try to work on yourself to increase competence so you become qualified as your wife's husband, without being so obsessed with this pursuit that you de-prioritize your spousal duties. Now what to do if this is not possible without compromising spousal duties for a long term? In that case, admit and accept the next best thing, that is, try to be the best spouse that you can be and see if you can take up some of the wifey roles. However, what I don't recommend doing is what feminists and gender equalists want. Re-define masculinity, manhood, husband and role of a man in a matrimony so he can feel like a husband and a man without playing the traditional role of a man or a husband. And am I saying that women should loose all respect for her husband in such a case? One because, this is only one aspect and not everything. And he might still be awesome as a life partner, just with some deficiency innhusband role. And what if he is not even that, is it ok to lose respect and love for him then? Again no, because that's very unwomanly and inhuman too. Once you have already created a strong spousal bond with someone, how can you stop loving that person start disrespecting that person leave that person on the basis of utility? A very competent person might lose competence due to life circumstances and eventually at old age most of the people lose most of it anyways. So your love, care and respect should be there anyways. But what's not right is to do what feminists and gender equalists do. Tell a man that he should not feel less of a man if he isn't the primary provider and protector. That this is wrong to feel that way because it's coming from the wrong traditional understanding of manhood and a man's role in household due to opressing patriarchal stereotypes. Because that is shaming a man for his natural, biological, innate traits, desires and sense of self-worth, calling it as all because of wrong social conditioning. Don't shame him for his lower competence than you but also don't shame him for feeling ashamed, embarrassed and inadequate about it by taunting him on his 'fragile male ego' and 'wrong social conditioning'.
1:01:20 THISSS…As a woman.. This is what me and most of the women i know need.. Not a traditional man.. But a man who has breadwinning POTENTIAL.. Less focus on breadwinning and more focus on POTENTIAL!!! For example; In a problematic household… Men who are lazy often use weaponised incompetence by ruining simple household tasks so that women have to do it for them.. resulting in women being overwhelmed by their job,chores and children while men sit on the sofa and burp. Least you can do is develop enough emotional intelligence to notice when your partner is overwhelmed and step in to do the bare minimum shtick…smh..
Find some silence as you allow yourself to rest. Don’t give away all your waking hours to noise. This is not a stolen moment. It has always belonged to you. Even if your own time is only available to you as you fall asleep, enjoy it as if you are floating on a gentle lake of solitude. Stay with yourself in the quiet. Indulge in it like you are nestling into a soft blanket.
Love this conversation but America is the only developed nation that doesn’t provide maternity leave. People aren’t financially capable of having kids due to the capitalist structure. Canada offers maternity leave 12months and up to 18months with your pay evenly distributed through out. Look at the Scandinavian countries, they have even better maternity and child care. Also you’re forgetting there’s a surplus in men because families didn’t want to have daughters. There are 39 million more men in china, 58 million more men India.
@@kaylayoung3672 I dont think that is the issue... Birthrates in america arent that bad in comparison to other countries. My county is one of the worst in birth rates in the EU, and we do provide maternity and paternity leave.... this isnt the issue behind why people dont make babies. Scandinavia birth rates arent that great either. Quite the opposite. And what happened in China and India has no relevancy to what happened in the western world. In the west there is actually more women then men... just a tiny bit.
One fact I didn't see mentioned is it was the 80s when women became the majority graduating with degrees so the inequality in education by pure number of graduates was solved four decades ago. But we still have a ton and created tons more since the 80s of supports for women and women only scholarships. Saying the breaks were taken off isn't really accurate. It's like they also got a free jet engine pushing them over the last two decades. Meanwhile, the vast majority of geniuses and the hugest publishers in academic journals continue to be male. Genius is far more often a male attribute by like a 80:1 ratio. With all the female support, we still lack engineers, we still don't see huge improvement from women contributing in the science field. We do see occasion small to moderate steps forward though; just not huge. They keep taking courses like music, drama, history, political science, gender studies and degrees that are less useful on average. Not all as some become chemists or engineers, but it is a rarity and there's jet engines pushing women into those fields. You can get in with a really low GPA and get free first rate scholarships and great internships at top companies, just for your sex
this man is so mature and well adjusted, I wish he were my dad lol. actually, the way they both talk about their wives is so heart warming. there is hope
Tom: I NEEDED to progress through a scarification ritual of my choosing to show MYSELF that life's now different, I'm married, and there's no turning back. Richard: Cub Scouts.
I think one of the biggest issues with risk is finances. A man alone can’t live on their own. They can’t afford to take risks. I could win the lottery if I gamble but not only is my likelihood not there but it also bankrupts me setting me so far behind that, at least in America, it’s incredibly hard to catch back up.
well the issues is to many men have got the msg men are trash we dont need men and everything wrong in life is due to men when enough walk away self delete or push back in a violent way society will collapse and everyone will look to men to help provide protect and rebuild but i am not so sure men will answer the calls
so steph when men follow the message we dont need men. We build the world everyone lives in making the economy run you know the oil rigs keeping the power plants on making sure you have running water and food in the store what do you think happens to your world without men?
Right now, ALL of us are being harmed. Don't make others believe the chaos is being caused by the opposite sex because then everyone will miss that there are REAL efforts to divide and conquer. We are seeing families, relationships, finances, education, politics, and religion being destroyed.
I agree completely, I refuse to believe the vast majority of women agree with the "fish bicycle" statement or anything similar (women dont need men). I believe both need eachother and what our society is doing is clearly wrong and will only create lonely and isolated people. Its not healthy or right.
He didn't say women did this, he said some specific feminists and women contributed. But I get it #notallwomen, it's stinky feeling when your demo is getting criticized. I am VERY familiar with that feeling.
Why do these people or I'll say "society" have a problem with men who indulge in pron and videogames? If men are not having any issues with the over indulgence of these substances then why do you even care HUH ? Don't waste your breathe cause we don't care , go and help the men who are struggling with mental health, we men are not tools of society or civilization, we only care for oversleeves or the people we choose to care for , we don't owe anyone anything.
An interesting question is: Can modern society be sustained with polygyny? The problem about polygyny is that tte surplus men have no incentive to contribute to society. Thus women will need to keep all aspects of society running together with the minority of “lucky” men. Yet if becoming a man is something men need to meticulously socialized into boys, will that be possible with fewever men being part of society? I think we’re going to realize that parting with monogamy will be way more detrimental than we can imagine.
Women need to be aware that men also are humans and need help first, women are accustomed that men have to do most of things even though that they are liberated, men are in crisis due to the past decisions taken where society is now and is not a visible problem.
Women need to be prepared to meet men's needs if they want their needs met in return from men. Too many women bring nothing to relationships but expectations.
I've had a lot of material things and overall I didn't have a safe feeling, whether in communicating or my husband being dependable for when I needed him emotionally
@@lifeyunique Your feelings are subjective and your responsibility to address within yourself. Sounds like you're projecting your insecurities onto your husband
I've always felt men's reluctance to get married is because they feel marriage is more of a forever thing than younger women do. The resposibility for a family has a different weight for a man. For a woman getting married is a way to have children in a protected environment, and more resources than she can generate on her own, but I must admit, I do not beleive marriage has the same "weight" to women as for men. Thus, maybe a woman should go through a ritual 10-15 years into marriage, becaue at that point she is still married, but for slightly different reasons than why she got married in the first place. It's my opinion, for men, there reason for being married doesn't change as the years go on, as much as it does for women. I am open, however, to hear other's opinions on this theory, though.
As a guy, I didn't get married because of how men are treated in divorce. It's tantamount to having a gun held to your head for the rest of your life. And this is one of the biggest misunderstandings between men and women because they just don't see marriage through the same lens.
College attendance is not a meaningful metric because college is a scam, and college degrees are often useless. A college degree might benefit women in the work place more than men. I am not sure.
is marriage as institution important or are men suffering from the consequences of divorce? and again lost of their role? Women love opportunistic ... they just get someone else to fulfill the role.
~@01:09:00 of risk taking... that requires very solid social support network and today I listened interesting viewpoint that basicly after 18 or 19 for men everything crumbles and they are expected to rise and shine before I guess "earn" social support + competition + people moving to different places. Women may be more resistant keeping relations though not superwoman type, they also crumble. One consistent thing also applying to Tom how he started this podcast channel is that risk taking needs very strong foundation in your life.
I love what’s he is now saying about nurturing from fathers and all that entails. Also his comments about not allowing society to trap people in the bio differences. Amen!
1:05:00 - THAT's exactly the problem and why men can't wrap their head around the perceived paradoxon that women want someone who is able to cry or talk about their emotions but at the same time like men who are "strong". There seems to be the misconception that EITHER you're ONLY crying and shrink yourself into a sissy version of a man OR you have to be a badass all the time, being physically strong and saving the day. No. It's about agency and still being able to be empathetic. So being self-actualizing and at the same time be emotionally open. That's what women want. Not a feminine sissy or a muscle mountain with lots of money and no qualities otherwise. But somehow the men that complain about the mentioned "paradoxon" tend to think in those two extreme categories. Richard Reeves is really a gem.
Yep, & feminisation sacrificed the sons, & the fathers, creating the intellectual fiction that gender is a social construct; that initial ignorance may perhaps be excused as the hubris of the battle, but not now, when we can see the result. A simple accounting of reality, ie what do men do & what would happen if they stopped doing those jobs, would show very clearly that all this nonsense about men being superfluous is just plain bs. Just take out their labor & economic contribution (taxes) & see how much & is left to sustain the welfare system that removes the need for males as breadwinners, & see how that looks! This whole business is a tragic deceit of altered perception; just look at the world & see what's there; it is NOT what this modern ideological conception says it is!!!
I've always been attracted to dominant men, like my father and it seems that men, like the two of you, make the best husbands and unfortunately, I realize now that I'm 67 years old and single that it worked against me having the Fulfillment of True Love, Marriage and Children because I had men, like the two of you and didn't realize what I had, until it was too late. I am the woman one of the first in my area to buy a home in my early twenties
Same for guys trying to wife a very attractive women because how she looks and acts seductive, only to find out later that she carries a whole slew of psychological issues loke being highly promiscuous which diminishes the relationship you have with her making it highly likely not to last. A much higher level of narcissistic behavior which makes her demanding, manipulative, and have low empathy. Low level to nurture, assumes everyone else is wrong and she is always right, views men as a tool and not a being, just insufferable to be around with
The most ironic thing is we don't have an abundance of masculinity causing harm, its the lack of it that is so disruptive to society (including women). If males are doing the right thing, we should be encouraged and nurtured to continue, but we really got apathetic about caring about males in our culture. Another big part is not intentional, its just very poor lifestyle choices lead to extremely low testosterone/hormone levels. Eating food with almost no nutrients for years, cannot possibly be a viable option. The rate we're going, women will just be devoid of alpha males, and men with honorable qualities. And honestly our overall bodyfat and body composition are so awful, people are legitimately gross, which lowers birth rates drastically.
As well as our modern women are becoming masculine and don't need a man or want a family. That's not good for society. The type of men you speak of is irrelevant because women will never ever give them a chance. We have just as many overweight women as men. Looks to me like they could simply date each other if the overweight women would actually consider it but right now even the fat girls are being picky cause we have so many single sexless men today. When good men want a good wife they are very difficult to find nowadays and most the modern girls are so delusional of who they allow to date that they just end up with toys or girlfriends. It's disgusting God help us! 🙏
The issue is not gender equality ( which is a lie. There's nothing equal about the 2 genders, polarity says otherwise) But we are equally important and complement each other. The problem is that feminism teaches that empowerment equals needing no man. That way of thinking is extremely toxic for family formation. No man, no matter how rich and powerful, will never say he needs no woman. That's crazy and men within reach will call him out on his delusional and toxic thinking. Women don't call this out.
How is women being able to feed themselves and their children (something that every female creatures on this earth is biologically wired to do) toxic? Men want us to need them so bad, the things they did out of this insecurity is unacceptable. Men should work more at being wanted instead of needed. My partner is someone that I want in my life, not that I need to survive. Just like when children grow up, they don't need their parents anymore, but they still want to be around their parents and love them. Simple.
Measuring the success of women solely on economic factors ignores the fact, it's a fact, not a feeling, that without women having children, societies and economies collapse. Not all couples have the choice of swapping roles. My wife is a Nurse. I work in IT. She never, at any point in our marriage, has earned more than me. Despite having a long list of qualifications and experience. I'm a '60s shotgun wedding baby. It's a fate that should never be foisted on anyone. My Dad resented my existence, my Mother STRONGLY favoured my younger brother. I was the core of my family's issues around which chaos swirled. I was left in no doubt from a young age that I was unwanted and the root cause of any issue my family unit experienced.
That was a good conversation. Unfortunately there are a lot of people that are diametrically opposed these days and it's only getting worse. "I hate you and everybody like you!!!" is getting more and more common. All that's left for weapons to come out then we'll thin out the extremes and maybe we can kind of get along again.
we didn't just take the brakes off women. We took the brakes off and put them on men out of spite. We put quotas in the workplace and school for women. We then reoriented our education system k-12 to suit women.
yes indeed, modern education is built mostly around empowering girls, and to accommodate them. This is done by design, they also got rid of most boy schools and shifted focus away from industrial or trade schools etc.
Exactly, that's what modern leftism is all about. Spite and revenge. "Privilege" is just a smoke screen for saying "you are born biologically evil and must suffer".
It's very difficult not to enter into a name-calling rant after listening to this complete idiocy. Instead I offer up the following video for anyone who is brave enough to hear the (obvious) truth. The presenter in the video is a liberal, and also someone I admire and respect. I don't usually respect liberals, but he's' a true believer, not the usual kind of phony. As he repeats in his presentation, "equality means equality for everyone," and he really means that. The sound quality is somewhat poor. A young woman at the microphone introduces the speaker up to about the 2:45 mark and I could barely understand anything she said. But the speaker doesn't use the microphone and his voice projects. Also the slides he presents summarize his points. ruclips.net/video/dHNv7i1s_HQ/видео.html He notes that up to the 1970s boys definitively outperformed girls in education as shown by standardized testing (note carefully: this was before the school system was "dumbed down." If girls are superior to boys, why can't they outperform boys in a competitive education system instead of one where our country comes in last in international comparisons?). So a "girl's crisis" got declared and we moved heaven and earth to help the girls. Now that boys need the help, what's the response? "Boys are stupid, throw rocks at them." (BTW what would help boys most? Phonics, taught properly, as opposed to the ridiculous "look-say" method. Learning to read early on is key. Look up the PBS series "The Electric Company" from the 1970s. Since that show had stars like Morgan Freeman and Rita Moreno, maybe you should have heard of it.)
I have heard from college age girls they are often disappointed in boys who seem to not have any goals. Especially if the boy still needs his family to help him with tasks of daily life and organization it is not attractive. A boy who seems ro rely on his own Mom still might be an indication the girl will have to treat him as an extra child instead of a helpful 2nd parent for their future kids. Maybe the girls aren't thinking that far ahead so it could be just a natural attraction to more goal oriented independent men.
What goal are the boys working for? A hyper-masculinized, irresponsible 304 that hates men? A girl that will divorce if him once she decides she is "unhappy"? A girl that wants all the power and none of the responsibility? Boys these days are taught they are evil by their nature. They are taught that their masculine instincts and urges are bad. This is what is taught in the female/feminist dominated public school system. Where is the female responsability in any of this? If men have nothing to work for, they will eventually stop working. I'm honestly amazed that boys are doing as good as they are doing these days. Everyone is against them.
@@lidiarona4335 I agree completely, I had and do have goals. But this is one thing that itches at the back of my mind. But i know that's not the message from average women. Most women I interact with have a healthy attitude towards men.
I think men them selfs should define how they want to be as women can do now. I e men need a political movement for freedom that is somerhing new. Feminismen cannot do this, that is a lie. A remeber, men already do the hard work with infrastructure that makes modern socity work, no cred what so ever for that today.
As a feminist, I can say that I love men and I want them to succeed. I wanted an equal, someone who would call me out when needed. I am very lucky that I found a husband who is emotionally supportive but is very masculine and confident and not ashamed of who he is. I hope we are lucky enough to have kids including a son. It would be such a privilege to raise a son who will simultaneously respect and value women but also be a man that is confident in his masculinity. We know that one day he will be someone’s spouse and we think its a great responsibility to raise balanced children.
No hate to feminism, we have to be honest that helping men does not fit into feminism and progressivism at all right now. You can’t talk about masculinity like that. Young men don’t know how to successfully be masculine while successful femininity is much more attainable
There are a lot of words in the discussion and comments; no answers to the questions asked is indicative of our international social commentary. Everyone is right and wrong at the same time. Maybe the answer is for modern feminism to be allowed to evolve so that the outspoken feminists agree that they have achieved their goal of seeing women taking their rightful place in society. I am not sure what that rightful place is, but once that is achieved, maybe society will have swung back around to being sensible and the question can be asked about what a boy or man is supposed to be without the narrative being bombarded by the feminine narrative. The feminism issue being resolved will give clear air to the boy man issue. I was brought up to put females first and it didn't seem to be a problem then. Just saying.
WARNING: I will never ask for your contact info in the comments section, that is someone impersonating me!
Hi Tom!
Reduce the educational gap between boys and men compared to Girls and Women.
Doing nothing about this situation is not working. Displaying indifference is not acceptable.
Men and boys know that college costs more than their potential future income. As such, it isn't worth doing.
Likewise, if I never marry or have kids, I can get by on a lot less.
The problem with polygamous society is that the men who have the resources to monopolize hundreds of women for themselves require other men to provide the resources to the guy. No guy can acquire all that wealth by himself, he needs a system of working men that work for him. If these guys get nothing out of serving a leader that takes all their wealth, there is no reason to serve in that society.
This is why we had slavery and war at the same time of polygyny. Men would, at any cost, gather resources.
Men also have an odd habit of developing intense loyalty in hierarchies. Trump for example is extremely popular among men and he is promising things. Men look the other way when he fucks outside of his marriage. Men are definitely still susceptible to this kind of thing.
Some czech man made video on facebook
he said men are so weak, Men are crying about women´s attitude,
men are crying also about kids misbehaving
Men got it wrong, Men got it backwards
If women sees men crying and complaining about everybody about women anda bout kids
she is no longer respecting him
she becomes lonelly woman taking care of kids, and kids start to misbehave
So if Men would do it backwards
ands start to be responsible men instead of crying and complaining
the wives would respect the men more and children would be happier.
He said women are stratring to wake up but men dont much.
@@steph6109 There was no shortage of those in monogamous societies.
The fact that Tom's videos tends to get Way more views is proof people don't want to accept the fact that this topic is crucial, don't want to address men's needs, and the narrative of male dominance/the Patriarchy are just being held together by words, rhetoric & today's fictitious culture.
People would rather create a boogie man to blame because it means they will never have to take responsibility for their own actions, failures, personality etc. The problem with the boogieman is that its so vague and has no proof of existence that they can use it as a way to always avoid accountability.
I came here from someone’s TikTok.
OMG!!!
What a resource! Every video!
This one in particular has to have millions of views!!!
I want to translate it in Ukrainian! I am sending it to ALL my close friends. Especially men.
Thank you!
I really appreciate these male-centered conversations Tom! So vital and few people have the courage to bring these up. In the work environment lately I’ve noticed women backing women, just to spite a lot of men. And God forbid you bring that up or even mention it, you’re done. For me, the best idea always wins no matter the age, race, or gender. But that hasn’t been the case in a lot of roles. Especially in the advertising and marketing business I’ve worked in the last 15 years.
Needs more about OLDER guys too. This issue is GENERATIONS old now. It's just now the numbers are catastrophic enough for the Luxury Beliefs crew to realize it will affect THEIR futures. SLIGHTLY.
Yeah. Women don't need men but my ex-wife who had an affair and then married the doctor she had it with is still more than happy to keep taking my check every month.
haha indeed
I've seen this situation all too much. Your hard earned money is just her extra spending cash for purses etc
She married a doctor and still got money from you? Even though alimony ends when you remarry?
Why are you sending a check unless there are children involved?
The suicide comment was interesting to me. I'm a male who had strong suicidal thoughts since early elementary school. I viewed myself with the same words, useless and worthless. I made 3-4 weak attempts at suicide in those early years. In order to gain some level of self respect, I had to channel that "aggression" into improving myself. I'm lucky it paid off. My attempt to swim to fatigue as a way to drown, and run until my asthma overcame me, ended up making me a good athlete. I've continued to push aggression and "purposefulness" for over a decade, pushing through multiple failures as I finally acquire a respectable college degree. Every time my successes are challenged, I have the natural mindset that I will work to success or to death. My listed achievement are a false representation of my wellbeing. In my mind, as soon as I find an obstacle I cannot overcome, I am no longer a functional-enough human that deserves to represent our species. I don't think death is a fair consequence anymore now that I have a job, but I can't shake the magnitude my responsibilities off my mind. Failure hurts. Trying again doesn't come without a cost. I'm almost certain I will die early from stress related disease or suicide. I just hope I do something useful before that happens.
I have personally found that men are more likely to care about the wellbeing of a large group of people, while women focus more on the few people closest to themselves. Everyone says we should end war, but few people put in any effort with the intention of contributing to global human wellness. If I could find just a single woman who actually takes action to help people on a global scale, I just might consider marriage in my life.
Great post
... But they are trying to save the world by _smashing the patriarchy._
😅
@@andrewsmith3257not really
So you're just a slave for other people
there are plenty of women interested in and working on improving the world. making generalisations and having negative expectations of any group, will mean you don't see the opposite of what you want to believe. What you see in the world won't change until you change your mind, which I doubt you will, but just know that you are the one projecting your expectations on others.
I would highly recommend finding a good and affordable therapist to work through some of your hangups, if you want to make any progress. You seem to have some common cognitive distortions, which are making your life harder than it needs to be.
I say this as someone that was chronically depressed for 20+ of my life, since childhood, and someone that had massive anger towards the world and the opposite gender. you have to change your outlook, and allow yourself to see good in yourself and others, if you want anything to be different. I wish you good luck.
I think it all comes down to personal philosophy. We currently live in an age of intense envy. Everyone looking at everyone else and going "I want what they got!" We define success as a state of perpetual conspicuous consumption. It's a con job to keep people in debt and always chasing after fantasies that leave them anxious and depressed so they'll buy anything that might offer a glimmer of false hope. If you don't buy into all that, life gets a hell of a lot easier. A basic fact of life is that only a handful will ever be rich. Most are, will be, and always have been, working class. So just find success in being the best working class you can be, because the con won't work if you're not greedy.
Humans are just selfish by nature. Look at Cain & Abel. I mean, look at God. He says he is a jealous God. So by design were f'ed. Just live your life to its fulfilment and try not to get caught up in rationalizing things that won't ever change.
Truth! You nailed it.
This episode is a revelation for me as a woman. I think it will really improve my marriage.
Yeah you modern ladies are basically children all the way through. Zero understanding of men or the world around you. Your lives are nerfed all the way through.
Good for you! While society is crumbling, you will be happy last spectator!
Don’t divorce him if you don’t feel justified or your just feeling different
I also love the sublte misandry here.
Both of these men point out dozens of things women have and do that is positive traits that are UNIQUE TO WOMEN.
Yet all of the traits that are unique to men we point to here are NEGATIVE traits. They literally do this all the time.
Hahahaha… your poor thing!
Mimimi
They're trying to make sure they aren't called misogynistic.
And they have listed positive traits of masculinity. Heck, Richard Reeves said his wife complained he wasn't being masculine enough.
How many girls get told “girl power” and “you go girl” and how many boys hear the equivalent growing up? And through their teens? And as adults? Just a thought
While simultaneously hearing society and women say I don't need a man, men are trash, getting divorced raped, men are the cause of all the problems in the world, etc.
Lol as a white person no one has to tell us “white power” because it’s obvious
Men never receive praise and compliments. When we do we are truly perplexed.
Also the whole "black power" movement, lmao. Imagine if there were a "white power" movement lmao.
For the record I think some of the black empowerment movement is good, like the valuing financial literacy part, it's just this isn't really mainstream, most of the mainstream stuff is just racist anti white propaganda.
Yah the Boysss I say that all the time playing games 😂
30min into the pod they say a woman wrote a book asking if we needed men. The last time I took my car to a mechanic a man fixed it. The people doing my lawn care are men the person who came and hooked up my internet when I moved in my house was a man. The people working over night fixing the roads I see are all men. Asking if we need men today is a slap in the face to all men. If all men disappeared overnight society would crumble
I'm a woman and I agree. Also, I'm a 50-year-old woman going through menopause and I wish women would talk more about what we go through during menopause. I'm so glad I'm out of the workforce the last few years because I don't know how women even stay in the workforce at my age. Menopause does a number on our bodies and how we feel overall. So I'm probably the rare woman who actually thinks that we should be taking care of things at home while men are bringing in the income. Or more women actually do think this way but don't want to say it out loud.
The inventions, information and labor that allowed feminism to flourish could not have existed without the ingenuity of men. Any talk of parity between the sexes could only exist because an infrastructure was put in place that nullified the natural advantages that men have over women. This modern infrastructure is the product of mostly male effort and innovation.
Facts! The whole conversation they talk about any disadvantage to women as an obvious example of oppression and any disadvantage to men as trivial
@@notch76 It's insane, this discussion does nothing besides driving a wedge between men and women. The statement "are men needed" or anything of the like should be treated as it is hate and misandry. Just as the opposite is misogony.
@@SquarishLink 100% agree! Emasculation and misandry has been effectively integrated into western culture. It's a complete slap in the face then they wonder why young men lack the motivation to achieve.
What about all the statistics on single mother homes and how boys tend to not finish school, get into trouble ext... all kids need both!💯
Most of those statistics are made up by a right wing media personality.
What kids need is stability.
That is easier with a two parent house hold.
The key is two parents.
It doesn't have to be man.
It is the stability that children crave.
Crave may be the wrong word.
For them to be whole they need stability.
The father meme was made up to frightened people about lesbian couples raising boys.
The problem is the stats on that prove the anti lesbian thing was completely wrong.
No. Women now have greatly increased access to the finances and labour of men without giving the hitherto expected things in return - companionship, support, happy family life. A woman can discard her man at will and the courts will give her half of his assets and put him in indentured servitude to her for the rest of his life. Meanwhile, the man receives nothing in return: no female companionship, no family life, no real relationship with his own children. Men aren't stupid and can see this is a terrible deal. But in the absence of that age-old partnership between man and wife, it's difficult for men to find a role and purpose in life, hence all the problems.
Women want an equal partner and companionship with their husbands. Men just want a sex slave, a mommy and a maid. Woman listen to the way men talk about us, their wives specifically. Men don't even seem to like women, not even their wives. It's pretty heart-breaking.
The sad thing is how no one seems to care about these men which makes it even more devastating to the ones that are affected. In fact not only is there no sympathy, people go out of their way to berate and put them down. Keep in mind however that we live in democracies and it will have more and more of a political impact as more of these men emerge. How we handle this is going to be extremely important to the future of humanity. If you think politics have been bad over the last decade that was just the beginning.
You've seen a drop in violent behavior because of p*rn and video games that drop will reverse as more men like me become disinterested in both and instead get interested in this, these are my observations but i think sedation is over, this Incel movement the Pills the suppositories whatever they are, are the result of this, they are waking up.
Try being Cluster B. Society will go out of your way to make you miserable
The battle of the sexes has been going on for a long time. And men in this nation have grown weary of the fight. Since women have decided to bad mouth their mates, the male children avoid marriage like it's the plague. This has really escalated in the last ten years or so. Young men don't think they need the headache any longer. It's hard for most males to be attracted to vicious females. I could understand this if they had been divorced, but many of the young girls today that have never been married. It's easier just check out of the dating game than to try to appease a woman these days.
@@jameslee-dp6cb I have always thought that one of the conditions of a divorce should be a written agreement that neither the man or woman will defame (bad mouth) the other in front of the children. It is devastating to the psychology of the child.
@@jameslee-dp6cb The problem with men these days has nothing to do with women. Men aren't present in their children's lives because of their own choices. The men are choosing to not be present. Men need to start supporting each other and their children if they want to make any changes and stop blaming women, who really have nothing to do with the problem.
Great conversation. So true, and so not talked about in the mainstream.
LOVED that he brought up Scouting. As I was watching I was reflecting on my own experiences in Scouts as coming of age moments.
“The triangle of biology, culture and the individual.” Reasonable. Very refreshing.
Wowww fabulous discussion! I have been watching lots of Richard Reeves's interview and you really brought a new side to the discussion with your questions!
It’s never going back to the way things were. Time to redefine all these ‘roles’ or just keep separating
I wouldnt put my hands in the fire for it. probably not, but we never know, culture changes and shifts all the time, and cultures get replaced all the time historically. We just assuming it is ours is the better one, or that is ours that going to do the replacing, and become dominant... we actually dont know that.
It will soon and it will be fun to watch :-)
"Time to redefine all these ‘roles’"
redefine roles? what that even mean, just live your live and wait for some society approval?
@@piureczko Yea i like gore and raw chaos as well :D
No, it won't be a separation. It will be destruction.
Useful and insightful discussion. Thank you both.
No way in hell i'll sacrafase myself for a todays boss bitch type of women, if shes given up her traditional roles, why do i must stay true to mine?
Exactly 💯
Why not be her equal partner, lover and companion?
@@KFrost-fx7dt because she wants to be more equal lol
I am unsure about this with aggressiveness. Men express it more physically and that is a more noticeable aggressiveness. Women express aggressiveness differently, less noticeable but it exist
I haven't watched the video yet, however I'm VERY surprised about the comment section, it's unexpectedly peaceful and mindful. My surprise about this also speaks for itself, I guess. 😅
Richard is a great advocate.
@@nyw4764 I feel so sorry for you
@Ny W you have no idea what tossing salads means do you? 😂😂😂
@Ny W I'd love to hear your description of how patriarchy flooded the world with unnecessary men; kinda sounds like a total refutation of biology to me; maybe a reverse China one child policy will sort it - you know, male infanticide.
Looking forward to your response ........
@@stacyliddell5038 me neither, assuning it's not get back in the kitchen - what does it mean?
Truth is, men around the world have succeeded at their role so much that they almost don't even have to do it anymore.
When you can build a society where the average citizen has no need to concern themselves with a broad takeover or mass proliferate of violence, yeah women do fine on their own.
It really was that, to act as that wall or barrier between the dangerous outside world and your family. That is what men were, for the longest time, that included work.
Now that society has progressed past that need, the thing men literally evolved to do, isn't immediately super important.
23:22 is where I start parting ways with Reeves. There is an abyss between "having a society that makes men feel obsolete" and having a society that made men obsolete. The background of the later one is plagued with exactly what created this existential resentment in men today: we were tools used to build a world that would set us aside at first chance.
Anyone that has been paying close and honest attention to these conversations since 2014 is extremely likely to agree. I think that's why the collapse of society has specifically become prevalent in the imaginations of conservative men. That's the way they are rationalizing their resentment.
Edit:
On the whole "everyone stop so I can lead". They are very clearly speaking in the same terms as Jordan Peterson and the non-moronic men of the Manosphere. This is terrifying because all they are doing is saying the same things in the most politically correct way possible. They are making subliminal accusations and are generating weird ideas. For example: Reeves says there is no need to stop male agency in order to empower female agency, but that is exactly how things happened. If it isn't necessary, why did it happen that way? Are all these Camille Paglia and Janice Fiamengo type of characters on the spot when they say feminism is plagued by a pathological hate for men?
If that's not the case, dudes like Reeves need to explain why things happened the way the have and make a point to save feminism from this verdict. It's hard to not make this connection.
Liberating women… Now a woman HAS to work for the average family to afford the same average lifestyle of the past. And no, I’m not seeing average young women or men being single and happily financially secure. So many are up to their eyeballs in debt, own nothing, and are living paycheck to paycheck with roommates or at home.
So even though women can get their own check, it’s on average not enough to afford a legitimately comfortable lifestyle. Everything has increased in cost to negate their paycheck and has increased the pressure on both single men and women to afford things that are now priced according to the new norm that families now are expected to have both the man and woman working.
I am not against women working, but the way it’s come about, and the result, isn’t what I call a liberation. I feel like women now have merely inherited the same burden as men have bore for centuries, which is this expectation that they are to grow up and work just the same.
Your entire reply is based on establishment indoctrination.
The system programs everyone to be system slaves.
The few that rebel and find their own way are the ones who are happiest and enjoy the most success.
The vast majority simply go along with the herd because it is easier and they are heavily programmed to comply & conform.
Any guy can self generate the income he needs to live the life he wants- if he has the courage to get started and is ready to put in the work.
The guys that choose the "easy" path end up miserable, broke and without freedom or options.
You are right, and I'm pretty sure the feminist movement was funded for women to get into the work force because of inflation
Amen 🙏
Am a woman. Not true. I own my home and live very well single.
@@jfaustin1742 That's the problem. Too many women want what you got instead of a family. But most women and men would be much happier in a successful relationship and family. But instead it's like everyone just lives and dies alone now. As a man who has always wanted a family and had one in the past this is very upsetting and challenging to even find a partner with all these collage educated masculine women out here today. Those in long term relationships also tend to live healthier and longer God help us. 🙏
Everyone has their struggles in life. The issue i see and experience is if you're straight white male your voice is suppressed, it's not just a male thing. I see it in the workplace all the time and suicide numbers reflect men's struggles and how they struggle to find a voice. This doesn't mean other groups don't have challenges but this one is just swept under the carpet because men apparently have an advantage and have it easy. It's not easy like it's made out to be, everyone has problems.
today's narrative in western countries is 1) anti white racist 2) misandric. It's specifically against what you wrote: "straight white males." That's the reality.
Nobody cares about us men so we learn to take care of ourselves and often love and die alone unfortunately. This is Not what God intended when he created a woman. 🙏 God help us so that men and women can once again connect all of them as you intended. Men and women need each other that's how we're created. Yin and yang ☯️
I'm a decade older than a half century who has had many jobs, and professional roles, and have never experienced what you are talking about. The most repression I've experienced in my life has been at the hands of toxic alpha males, every single time.
@@flickwtchr Things have changed
@@flickwtchr sheltered, in a way
Why do we respect women's choices to earn or stay home?
Yet, we do not respect men's choices to work or stay home?
We have a very limited, archaic and stereotyped view of men that pigeonholes men into being some superman
24:53
Amazing interview! Fireworks of ideas sparking in my brain and in next conversations. Thank you!
Women, for the most part, have hypergamous aspirations. They prefer to marry or partner with men who have equal or better educational attainment and income relative to themselves. They reject men, for the most part, who score below them in these areas. So it behooves women to root for the success of men because if men continue on this path, women will find fewer and fewer of them suitable for long term relationships. The end result is not only an epidemic of loneliness for men, but an epidemic of loneliness for women as well. Additionally, with a smaller dating pool, the shrinking number of men who meet this hypergamous standard will be able to date multiple women and women will have to be content with sharing a guy. Essentially, what you will see if this trajectory continues is the modern revival of harems or polygamy.
Sharing? That word implies ownership. And I refuse to ascribe to the idea of owning my partner. I see my partner as a human, with needs and wants that at times might be removed from my needs and wants and here is where agency comes into play.
@@lidiarona4335 So you do not value monogamy?
@@alphacause I do not value being considered chattel
@@lidiarona4335 How is expecting monogamy from your partner demeaning?
@@alphacause you don't get the point.
"it is so gross to say slow down so i can lead"
Tom Bilyeu
I totally agree.
"It is infinitely more gross that women are fundamentally incapable of loving a man the way he thinks he should be loved by a woman"
Me
Women feel the same about the way men love...if that makes you feel better.
Hence the divorce rate initiated by women.
This ommits the very importance of innate biological influemces on pair bonding. Social constructs dont trump reality
The only thing missing is the blue hair. 😞. This is the most depressing conversation I've heard yet. "Where have all the men gone?" only means anything when the electricity stops. This is just a self-deletion buffet.
I reject this “taking the brakes off” characterization vehemently. First, what held women back was cultural - meaning it was men and women not encouraging their daughters to pursue careers. Today’s society has completely tilted in favor of women. It’s parents, it’s K-12 educators, it’s academia, it’s tax law, it’s family court, it’s homeless shelters and social programs, it’s food stamps, it’s our media landscape, it’s advertising, it’s corporate HR, it’s entertainment, it’s sports, it’s our military. Our entire civilization is riven with female encouragement and preference today. I was going to buy and read this guy’s book, but after listening to this interview, I realized that his views are not part of the solution. He’s just making the book promotion tour annd has to seem more evenly balanced. The problem today isn’t evenly balanced. I’m waiting for somebody to report the way things really are, but nobody puts it all together accurately. Because, after all, women read more books.
Women weren't allowed to go to Harvard untill the 1960s.
Women weren't allowed to have bank accounts or get loans till the 1960s.
Women weren't allowed to go to the doctors on their own untill the 1960s.
Schools for these reasons would gear women to become house ornaments from a young age as they'd need to be truly exceptional to make it in a world that had laws making it hard for them to be independent.
Now we have equality law where women have the same life opportunities as men. Teachers now see value in giving girls the same time and resource as boys. That's what they mean by taking off the breaks.
@@steph6109 No, schools give girls MORE time and resource. That’s why they get better grades, despite IQ parity. Boys are persona non grata in public schools, easily slipping through the cracks of a system laser-focused on girls. Girls get more scholarships, college degrees and tax breaks on starting businesses. It’s why boys struggle in reading and writing, and account for the vast majority of high school dropouts, suicides, criminal behavior and homelessness. And the vast majority of shelters are for women. It’s astonishing how young people use their distorted views of history to justify excesses of the present. But next time you try it, be sure you aren’t talking to someone who lived through those times. “Not allowed” by whom? My mother had a career in the mid-1940s and, magically, managed to drive to the doctor by herself without ending up in jail.
The point you’re making I actually agree with - always have. Everybody should have equal opportunity to succeed in this country. But that’s not what we have now. Remember that for every person who is given a preference, someone else is denied basic equality.
@@graymatters7584 Girls have better grades because they spend more time studying and doing their homework. Girls raised their hands more to ask questions and ask teachers for help more if they struggle because unlike boys, they have no fear of apparent weakness. That is the reason why girls perform better at school, as well as girls being more mature in the school years. This is not a systematic oppression like men were doing to women in the past at all, not even remotely close.
He correctly recognizes that the gap must be bridged before any change can happens. Even if it means softening his views to win over some feminists
Education is constructed for women. Men and women should be in separate systems.
23:20 Maybe that is because women, society and the media is calling them that all the time 24/7 and blame them for everything? And maybe that is why they checked out from society and are now in games instead where they are not contantly blamed, put down, accused of things they did not do and cannot help, called names and harassed.
I’ll never understand this framing. Who has it worse, one group of 4 billion human beings who happen to be female, or one group of 4 billion human beings who happen to be male? How can you lump 4 billion people into a single generalised group?
How many guys want a wife that goes toe to toe with them?
There's the problem.
Men think they're supposed to be in control and they freak out when they're wife doesn't let them.
Exactly!!
When you mean toe to toe, you mean controlling, nagging wife? yes men are not into that.
@@knightheaven8992
That is not what I mean.
I mean you want to do something and you have to convince her not tell her.
Most guys are too sensitive to convince. They need a passive woman that they can control.
It seems like a boring life.
@@mikeoveli1028 Maybe when feminism is gone and stops turning women into caricature of men they invented maybe then we can have negotiations but as it stands these anti-social, promiscuous, angry, defiant contumacious, narcissistic/borderline psychopathic women are not interested in that.
Thanks for talking about it men are alone and we have to fight to get back on track and be able to be active and good parts of society, but as of now we have to work together and most of the times lonely but it is okay if it is this way believe most of us are on the same page and in the end you are not alone.
It's too late.
Something I've noticed, as someone who finished college at 36. College grads tend (like these men) to see college as an essential step to full adulthood and decent earnings. Those ideas are not true.
Oil riggers, truck drivers, plumbers, electricians and carpenters (among others) earn far above the median income. None require college.
Women today expect their men to earn more than the women do. In recent polls, 1.5 times as much. When most women weren't working, this was not an issue. Now that more women graduate from college, fewer men will fit that criterion alone. College graduates also expect potential mates to be white collar, so those wealthy plumbers and oil riggers can forget it.
Another interesting thing is, most women now also expect men to be over 6 feet tall. Last I checked, that was only about 15% of all men.
If you combine all these standards, we end up somewhat less than 5% of the men that women even would consider. That's without even thinking about any emotional connections.
Add to that, over 70% of American women are overweight or obese. 40% of all children are born to unwed mothers. 28 is the average age of first marriage for American women and initial loss of virginity is before 18, which implies around 10+ years (on average) of promiscuous behsvior. Studies say women admit to 6 lifetime sex partners on average (which probably means 18 in reality).
Thus:
About 1 in 20 men is acceptable to most women.
About 1 in between 3 and 10 women is acceptable to most men.
Result: most men realize that women really don't want them and odds are, even if they did, the women would probably cheat and eventually divorce them and take everything they had.
A little math shows that college is expensive. It might eventually pay for itself, but there are no guarantees. More math shows that a single man can get by with far less than a single woman can and much less than a married couple can, not to mention kids.
So, even if I earn half what I could as a college graduate, I still can end up with more at the end of the day than a typical married college professor. Without the nagging. And everything I have is MINE.
Anyone that says "slow down so I can lead" does not understand optimization. Leaders should be chosen organically, by just the nature of the fact that the person who does it best is the person who leads.
Sure, but that organic process is a battle, & those that say this are battling to get there too, using whatever power levers they have - leadership is politics, otherwise the brutes would lead; one needs supporters to lead, & to sustain them to continue to lead .. ie politics.
In social higher animals leadership is politics.
And as for optimisation .. that's a theoretical economic concept, useful as a thinking or verbal tool, not so much as a descriptor of nature.
Is it optimal for the giraffes vagus nerve to be 10 M long? No; it just happens that in fish that nerve goes under the aorta .. natural systems make do with what they start with; & they don't make the best, they make something that works well enough to get through the day, then the next day; over time that creates what looks optimal, but time is a bitch, things change .. anaerobes optimised, until algae, dinosaurs, until .. boom, ...
Nature is more of a shotgun than a sniper.
With regards to the earnings disparity between certain types of vocation: it's not a question of whether society deems care work to be 'valuable' or not, it just comes down to basic principles of supply and demand. Let's be honest, there's far fewer highly-skilled mechanical engineers out there than there are people who either naturally lean towards it or can be trained to be care workers, and thus the former commands a far higher salary.
👌
Spot on bro. This also applies to something like music. Engineers, nurses, and doctors are infinitely more valuable than rappers lol but music artists have a massive audience/demographic and selling a product scales better than selling a service; Just by the structure and the nature of their business, their earning potential is greater. As you said, it's not a matter of the work being valuable or not. It's not that simple.
Rule of thumb is to stop listening to people once they equate feminism with good because at that point we have removed ourselves from observable objective reality and entered into narcissistic dream world of fantasies and delusions.
Even so, there is such a thing as pricing yourself out of the market. And many businesses did that in 2022. I think we may be headed for depression. Farmers watch out, females will have you in their sights. They know that food is the basis on which we get our energy, they already have all the money.😆
Bullshit. If "mens earning potential" were a proxy for having your shit together, then a lifetime cashier at Walmart would be considered as attractive as a professional. The missing component is social status.
Lifetime job that can be replaced by simple robot is not an achievement.
Status doesn't matter much to women but your ability to get what you want out of life, to learn, to innovate, to multitask and work together for a common goal....
@@steph6109 All evidence to the contrary
@@steph6109. “Status doesn’t matter much to women”
What?!?! That is an absurd comment.
I loved listening to the philosophy behind this topic.
this discussion is hilarious, most of the time richard is stating that "women don't need men" anymore. I mean i guess they don't given modern feminism and the hate i see online from the opposite sex seems like that is the message.
but with rates of happiness going down for women on average, and the need of women from men for a purpose wouldnt it be better for the sexes to gettogether? instead of constantly being at eachothers throats and looking at one another as mere disposable commodities.
He is saying that, that modern society does now provide most of what older society's needed men for, with the exception of the male input in child rearing - the state can't do that very well.
What he is saying is that culture must evolve to deal with the fact that men are not as necessary as they once were, that this is one of the key roles of culture, but that the politicization of this cultural evolution as a war is a dangerous thing, bc it is blocking the evolution of positive solutions for the dispirited male problem.
If one does the math, it's pretty easy to show that without the male contribution to making stuff, keeping stuff working & paying taxes, a very large portion of the welfare state which makes men superfluous, would rapidly eat the economy.
The superfluous male concept is a very very narrow analysis, it's the type of total bs that highly educated & powerful women might propose.
How in any way can it be taken seriously?
This bs anti male culture just needs to take a reality pill, to see what is real & stop trashing the male contribution.
It's still there, it's just being trashed bc women think they have to defeat men to get a fair shot; a not unreasonable idea, given the resistance to them getting a fair shot.
That defeating men is not a good strategy, if it also demoralises & kills our sons, is becoming apparent.
That will drive cultural change, if it is allowed to occur. This is why the culture war needs to be seen to be very dangerous if the politicians are allowed to weaponise it.
But it is a war, in the sense that positive definitions of progress must be hashed out; and a bunch of issues are being thrown into this hot pot, not least of which is broad dissatisfaction with the power balance - between capital & labor, which equates to income & educational disparity, hence the attack on institutions, on elites etc; these are just proxies of power.
This is what tRump & De Santis have figured out & weaponised; that 'the status quo is just not fair' is a powerful feeling in society, hence a political force that can be harnessed; trumps whining can be reduced to - "It's just not fair to we little ppl" - see how he strives to make the threat about everyone, not just him, that's to disguise that he's not one of them, but represents them.
In this sense the far left is on the same team, fighting the same battle, using the same tactics; they battle powerlessness too, & trash anything that represents the forces they see as responsible for that - racism sexism, homophobia, patriarchy etc.
The battle is about a fair share of the spoils of success.
In the past, after a battle, there'd be booty - the spoils of war; if powerful groups that helped win the battle didn't get a fair share of the spoils .. if they were will armed & organised they threatened havoc, & got their share; new conflicts erupted as powerful groups disputed the sharing formula.
Globalisation is the bogey man - why? Because it's delivered great wealth to some & deprived millions of the decent life they had before. It's that simple.
It is about power, the power to get a fair share of the spoils of success.
And the wise old model of 'share lest there be revolution' seems unlearned.
@@martinpatrick8964 point is it is "technically" possible now
Yeah the plot twist of all of this, is that women do need men, and men do also need other men, and i was going to say society... but not really it is more like Civilization itself needs men. Either men are doing the mad max thing or just retreating, the end result is similar.
Women don't need men's WILLING, VOLUNTARY contributions, because they can take what they need with the force of the state. Studies show that because men pay the majority of income tax, and women receive the majority of government benefits, the average man transfers $100,000 to the average woman over his life time in place like New Zealand and America.
After listening to this, it seems clear that men overall has it overwhelming worse than women
What if i told you, they always had?
I see it different, humanity is struggling not depending on sexe or age.
When you focus you see the hard pattern of polarisatie all over the world.
It is the matrix that is pushing people to choose a side rather the to focus on global issues as human beings combined.
When you set limits on 1:1 people will automatically loose focus on the Bigger picture.
It is a global strategy
Thank you. This men vs women narrative is so basic
I see many dating profiles that say if you support Trump don't message me or if your republican we won't get along. I mean c'mon we can't create a family because you believe in the Biden Regime? That's not really a person I'm willing to date if they are that selfish. It's almost as bad as the list most women have today that keeps them single and alone. We need to go back to just going out on a date with no expectations just two going out to have fun. But now most men never even get the first date because of the crappy men she chose before you now you will never get a shot. 🙄
.
Who is driving this strategy & why?
Before recently, the idea of people being happily not married was ludicrous. Women especially, a significant percentage, adopt the ideology of, I can make a life without a man.
I’m only 25 minutes in but so far no mention that just because a man is not the only breadwinner and women are not economically dependent on men, doesn’t mean a man’s contribution to the family’s finances doesn’t drastically change the overall situation. Even if it’s less. If I make 80k and my husband makes 60k, that’s a huge contribution that totally changes a lifestyle. Just saying.
You could partner up with a female friend and get the same outcome. If its just about splitting bills.
One can say the same about the husband being very strong, say a senior police officer but wife being stronger, say a commando or a marine. Husband is still contributing in making his family, community and country strong. His wife might be more qualified as a protector but he still is also very qualified, even if less than his wife.
One can also say the same if husband is very powerful, a mayor of a state's capital and wife being more powerful, say the governor of that state. Husband is less powerful than his wife but still contributes in making his family very powerful and reputed.
And in finances too, if husband earns well, he contributes to his family's finances even if he earns far less than his wife. His wife might be more qualified as a provider but he still is also very qualified, even if less than his wife.
Yes but you, the wife, would still be the primary provider and he would only be a secondary also contributed. And if this bothers him as a man, it's not wrong, rather desirable. It's wrong only if he wants to bring you down so that he can disillusion himself and others that he is the primary provider.
In certain contexts and on certain occasions, even a mouse can protect a lion. But largely only a lion has the competence of being a protector of a mouse (intent aside) and not vice versa. The stronger one is the protector and the weaker one is under protection. Similarly the one who earns more is the provider and the one who earns less is the provided for, at least in relative terms (even if standalone and in isolation that earning is good enough to provide).
Agree that 60K is also a contribution but so is $0, since one can contribute in household in non-economic ways.
Manhood or masculinity is not an absolute switch bulb attribute but a relative term. To be a husband and not just a life partner or spouse, the husband to qualify as a husband, needs to be more competent in the masculine or manly role than at least his wife, the manly role being of provider and protector. So to be a spouse, being a good human being, being loving and caring, contribute in some way is good enough. But to qualify as a wife, one needs to be better than her husband in homemaking and housekeeping. And to qualify as a husband, one needs to be better than his wife in providing and protecting. If not, the man becomes the wife and the woman becomes the husband. And it should hurt a man to not qualify as a husband. A man being fine with just being a spouse or being a wife and not a husband, is a man without any male ego and masculine pride.
Now am I saying that in such a situation, the man should turn bitter and resent the wife's success, try to keep her back, or expect the wife to stroke his ego by voluntarily bringing herself down, so he appears as a qualified husband to the world? Or be insecure that his wife would leave him for someone better? Absolutely no! That would be becoming a bad spouse in pursuit of being a husband and becoming inhuman in pursuit of being a man. Moreover, receiving something one is not qualified for as a favour like a father deliberately losing to their kids to make them feel better, is something no self-respecting adult would like.
So what do I recommend to men?
It's simple. Try to work on yourself to increase competence so you become qualified as your wife's husband, without being so obsessed with this pursuit that you de-prioritize your spousal duties. Now what to do if this is not possible without compromising spousal duties for a long term? In that case, admit and accept the next best thing, that is, try to be the best spouse that you can be and see if you can take up some of the wifey roles.
However, what I don't recommend doing is what feminists and gender equalists want. Re-define masculinity, manhood, husband and role of a man in a matrimony so he can feel like a husband and a man without playing the traditional role of a man or a husband.
And am I saying that women should loose all respect for her husband in such a case? One because, this is only one aspect and not everything. And he might still be awesome as a life partner, just with some deficiency innhusband role. And what if he is not even that, is it ok to lose respect and love for him then? Again no, because that's very unwomanly and inhuman too. Once you have already created a strong spousal bond with someone, how can you stop loving that person start disrespecting that person leave that person on the basis of utility? A very competent person might lose competence due to life circumstances and eventually at old age most of the people lose most of it anyways. So your love, care and respect should be there anyways. But what's not right is to do what feminists and gender equalists do. Tell a man that he should not feel less of a man if he isn't the primary provider and protector. That this is wrong to feel that way because it's coming from the wrong traditional understanding of manhood and a man's role in household due to opressing patriarchal stereotypes. Because that is shaming a man for his natural, biological, innate traits, desires and sense of self-worth, calling it as all because of wrong social conditioning. Don't shame him for his lower competence than you but also don't shame him for feeling ashamed, embarrassed and inadequate about it by taunting him on his 'fragile male ego' and 'wrong social conditioning'.
1:01:20 THISSS…As a woman.. This is what me and most of the women i know need.. Not a traditional man.. But a man who has breadwinning POTENTIAL..
Less focus on breadwinning and more focus on POTENTIAL!!!
For example; In a problematic household… Men who are lazy often use weaponised incompetence by ruining simple household tasks so that women have to do it for them.. resulting in women being overwhelmed by their job,chores and children while men sit on the sofa and burp.
Least you can do is develop enough emotional intelligence to notice when your partner is overwhelmed and step in to do the bare minimum shtick…smh..
You need to get better at vetting men
Find some silence as you allow yourself to rest. Don’t give away all your waking hours to noise. This is not a stolen moment. It has always belonged to you.
Even if your own time is only available to you as you fall asleep, enjoy it as if you are floating on a gentle lake of solitude. Stay with yourself in the quiet. Indulge in it like you are nestling into a soft blanket.
Love this conversation but America is the only developed nation that doesn’t provide maternity leave. People aren’t financially capable of having kids due to the capitalist structure. Canada offers maternity leave 12months and up to 18months with your pay evenly distributed through out. Look at the Scandinavian countries, they have even better maternity and child care.
Also you’re forgetting there’s a surplus in men because families didn’t want to have daughters. There are 39 million more men in china, 58 million more men India.
@@kaylayoung3672 your absolutely right
@@kaylayoung3672 I dont think that is the issue... Birthrates in america arent that bad in comparison to other countries. My county is one of the worst in birth rates in the EU, and we do provide maternity and paternity leave.... this isnt the issue behind why people dont make babies. Scandinavia birth rates arent that great either. Quite the opposite. And what happened in China and India has no relevancy to what happened in the western world. In the west there is actually more women then men... just a tiny bit.
One fact I didn't see mentioned is it was the 80s when women became the majority graduating with degrees so the inequality in education by pure number of graduates was solved four decades ago. But we still have a ton and created tons more since the 80s of supports for women and women only scholarships. Saying the breaks were taken off isn't really accurate. It's like they also got a free jet engine pushing them over the last two decades. Meanwhile, the vast majority of geniuses and the hugest publishers in academic journals continue to be male. Genius is far more often a male attribute by like a 80:1 ratio. With all the female support, we still lack engineers, we still don't see huge improvement from women contributing in the science field. We do see occasion small to moderate steps forward though; just not huge. They keep taking courses like music, drama, history, political science, gender studies and degrees that are less useful on average. Not all as some become chemists or engineers, but it is a rarity and there's jet engines pushing women into those fields. You can get in with a really low GPA and get free first rate scholarships and great internships at top companies, just for your sex
this man is so mature and well adjusted, I wish he were my dad lol. actually, the way they both talk about their wives is so heart warming. there is hope
This vid will be amazing, looking forward to watching it. 🔥
Tom: I NEEDED to progress through a scarification ritual of my choosing to show MYSELF that life's now different, I'm married, and there's no turning back.
Richard: Cub Scouts.
I think one of the biggest issues with risk is finances. A man alone can’t live on their own. They can’t afford to take risks. I could win the lottery if I gamble but not only is my likelihood not there but it also bankrupts me setting me so far behind that, at least in America, it’s incredibly hard to catch back up.
Society isn't in men's favour, you just need to look at the statistics and all the men bashing online, and on the media.
“Thanks men, but we got it from here”
Holy fuck, that hit so hard I felt like I was dreaming of fighting Mike Tyson.
Except there is no thanks and more like resentment.
@@meowmix1569thanks for what?
What our fathers did?
@@steph6109 yeah, nothing men every did was amazing and nothing women ever did was bad. You're mentally ill lol
well the issues is to many men have got the msg men are trash we dont need men and everything wrong in life is due to men when enough walk away self delete or push back in a violent way society will collapse and everyone will look to men to help provide protect and rebuild but i am not so sure men will answer the calls
so steph when men follow the message we dont need men. We build the world everyone lives in making the economy run you know the oil rigs keeping the power plants on making sure you have running water and food in the store what do you think happens to your world without men?
Right now, ALL of us are being harmed. Don't make others believe the chaos is being caused by the opposite sex because then everyone will miss that there are REAL efforts to divide and conquer. We are seeing families, relationships, finances, education, politics, and religion being destroyed.
I agree completely, I refuse to believe the vast majority of women agree with the "fish bicycle" statement or anything similar (women dont need men). I believe both need eachother and what our society is doing is clearly wrong and will only create lonely and isolated people. Its not healthy or right.
He didn't say women did this, he said some specific feminists and women contributed. But I get it #notallwomen, it's stinky feeling when your demo is getting criticized. I am VERY familiar with that feeling.
id agrue men have occupied the bottom and top of the status through history and women have always been protected and looked after.
7:35 what makes that work less valuable is how many people are qualified and willing to do the work. Has nothing to do with genitals.
"Should"
if you can not start a living and have family in a society as a postman, or bar tender that sociaty will collapse big time
Why do these people or I'll say "society" have a problem with men who indulge in pron and videogames? If men are not having any issues with the over indulgence of these substances then why do you even care HUH ?
Don't waste your breathe cause we don't care , go and help the men who are struggling with mental health, we men are not tools of society or civilization, we only care for oversleeves or the people we choose to care for , we don't owe anyone anything.
Tom is brilliant - He has great values ❤
and now they're all on OF lmao
Very Good conversation!!!
Very nice interview. Was glued to every word.
Were the breaks simply taken off? Seams like there was more than this culturally and strategically across gov and corp.
Great conversation 👌🏻
An interesting question is:
Can modern society be sustained with polygyny?
The problem about polygyny is that tte surplus men have no incentive to contribute to society.
Thus women will need to keep all aspects of society running together with the minority of “lucky” men.
Yet if becoming a man is something men need to meticulously socialized into boys, will that be possible with fewever men being part of society?
I think we’re going to realize that parting with monogamy will be way more detrimental than we can imagine.
Women need men that can create a safe environment period. Doesn't matter if you want kids or not this will always be true.
Women need to be aware that men also are humans and need help first, women are accustomed that men have to do most of things even though that they are liberated, men are in crisis due to the past decisions taken where society is now and is not a visible problem.
Women need to be prepared to meet men's needs if they want their needs met in return from men. Too many women bring nothing to relationships but expectations.
I've had a lot of material things and overall I didn't have a safe feeling, whether in communicating or my husband being dependable for when I needed him emotionally
Aren't men just protecting women from men?
@@lifeyunique Your feelings are subjective and your responsibility to address within yourself. Sounds like you're projecting your insecurities onto your husband
I've always felt men's reluctance to get married is because they feel marriage is more of a forever thing than younger women do. The resposibility for a family has a different weight for a man. For a woman getting married is a way to have children in a protected environment, and more resources than she can generate on her own, but I must admit, I do not beleive marriage has the same "weight" to women as for men. Thus, maybe a woman should go through a ritual 10-15 years into marriage, becaue at that point she is still married, but for slightly different reasons than why she got married in the first place. It's my opinion, for men, there reason for being married doesn't change as the years go on, as much as it does for women. I am open, however, to hear other's opinions on this theory, though.
As a guy, I didn't get married because of how men are treated in divorce. It's tantamount to having a gun held to your head for the rest of your life. And this is one of the biggest misunderstandings between men and women because they just don't see marriage through the same lens.
I agree. If not to have children, I can support myself and my husband doesn't out earn me by a factor of 2 ..why get married at all?
Imagine my surprise at learning that "I took a vow" didn't mean as much to my ex-wife as it did to me.
College attendance is not a meaningful metric because college is a scam, and college degrees are often useless. A college degree might benefit women in the work place more than men. I am not sure.
Well you need degrees for good jobs like doctor, lawyer, engineer, astrophysicist. All the good science stuff.
Arts degrees are trash
Jamie Fox, Puff Daddy, and Will Smith should give a seminar on living masculinity.
is marriage as institution important or are men suffering from the consequences of divorce? and again lost of their role? Women love opportunistic ... they just get someone else to fulfill the role.
~@01:09:00 of risk taking... that requires very solid social support network and today I listened interesting viewpoint that basicly after 18 or 19 for men everything crumbles and they are expected to rise and shine before I guess "earn" social support + competition + people moving to different places. Women may be more resistant keeping relations though not superwoman type, they also crumble. One consistent thing also applying to Tom how he started this podcast channel is that risk taking needs very strong foundation in your life.
I’m a new sub. Loving your channel 👌
Great show
I love what’s he is now saying about nurturing from fathers and all that entails. Also his comments about not allowing society to trap people in the bio differences. Amen!
15:50 Did this guy just say that women being able to raise kids without a man is a good thing?
1:05:00 - THAT's exactly the problem and why men can't wrap their head around the perceived paradoxon that women want someone who is able to cry or talk about their emotions but at the same time like men who are "strong". There seems to be the misconception that EITHER you're ONLY crying and shrink yourself into a sissy version of a man OR you have to be a badass all the time, being physically strong and saving the day. No. It's about agency and still being able to be empathetic. So being self-actualizing and at the same time be emotionally open. That's what women want. Not a feminine sissy or a muscle mountain with lots of money and no qualities otherwise. But somehow the men that complain about the mentioned "paradoxon" tend to think in those two extreme categories. Richard Reeves is really a gem.
So when women aren’t forced into marriage they don’t choose it? I wonder why 😂
Is that your only takeaway?
@@Pistolita221 my whole life ive been told that women are the ones begging for marriage. Looks like its the other way around.
Marriage was a solution for looking after children.
Yep, & feminisation sacrificed the sons, & the fathers, creating the intellectual fiction that gender is a social construct; that initial ignorance may perhaps be excused as the hubris of the battle, but not now, when we can see the result.
A simple accounting of reality, ie what do men do & what would happen if they stopped doing those jobs, would show very clearly that all this nonsense about men being superfluous is just plain bs.
Just take out their labor & economic contribution (taxes) & see how much & is left to sustain the welfare system that removes the need for males as breadwinners, & see how that looks!
This whole business is a tragic deceit of altered perception; just look at the world & see what's there; it is NOT what this modern ideological conception says it is!!!
sheer selfishness and borderline child abuse. Glad to have been of assistance.
Anyone who wants Medicare and social security payments must raise at least two children!
I've always been attracted to dominant men, like my father and it seems that men, like the two of you, make the best husbands and unfortunately, I realize now that I'm 67 years old and single that it worked against me having the Fulfillment of True Love, Marriage and Children because I had men, like the two of you and didn't realize what I had, until it was too late.
I am the woman one of the first in my area to buy a home in my early twenties
Yup sounds very familiar to what is going on today
Same for guys trying to wife a very attractive women because how she looks and acts seductive, only to find out later that she carries a whole slew of psychological issues loke being highly promiscuous which diminishes the relationship you have with her making it highly likely not to last. A much higher level of narcissistic behavior which makes her demanding, manipulative, and have low empathy. Low level to nurture, assumes everyone else is wrong and she is always right, views men as a tool and not a being, just insufferable to be around with
The most ironic thing is we don't have an abundance of masculinity causing harm, its the lack of it that is so disruptive to society (including women). If males are doing the right thing, we should be encouraged and nurtured to continue, but we really got apathetic about caring about males in our culture. Another big part is not intentional, its just very poor lifestyle choices lead to extremely low testosterone/hormone levels. Eating food with almost no nutrients for years, cannot possibly be a viable option.
The rate we're going, women will just be devoid of alpha males, and men with honorable qualities. And honestly our overall bodyfat and body composition are so awful, people are legitimately gross, which lowers birth rates drastically.
As well as our modern women are becoming masculine and don't need a man or want a family. That's not good for society. The type of men you speak of is irrelevant because women will never ever give them a chance. We have just as many overweight women as men. Looks to me like they could simply date each other if the overweight women would actually consider it but right now even the fat girls are being picky cause we have so many single sexless men today. When good men want a good wife they are very difficult to find nowadays and most the modern girls are so delusional of who they allow to date that they just end up with toys or girlfriends. It's disgusting God help us! 🙏
Solid comment 👍
I would add nutrients for the soul (books, culture, philosophy)
Good is understanding that women have equal value as men. Women are not things, they are people.
But it is men who have been devalorized
The issue is not gender equality ( which is a lie. There's nothing equal about the 2 genders, polarity says otherwise) But we are equally important and complement each other.
The problem is that feminism teaches that empowerment equals needing no man. That way of thinking is extremely toxic for family formation. No man, no matter how rich and powerful, will never say he needs no woman. That's crazy and men within reach will call him out on his delusional and toxic thinking. Women don't call this out.
How is women being able to feed themselves and their children (something that every female creatures on this earth is biologically wired to do) toxic? Men want us to need them so bad, the things they did out of this insecurity is unacceptable. Men should work more at being wanted instead of needed. My partner is someone that I want in my life, not that I need to survive. Just like when children grow up, they don't need their parents anymore, but they still want to be around their parents and love them. Simple.
Time stamps?
Measuring the success of women solely on economic factors ignores the fact, it's a fact, not a feeling, that without women having children, societies and economies collapse. Not all couples have the choice of swapping roles. My wife is a Nurse. I work in IT. She never, at any point in our marriage, has earned more than me. Despite having a long list of qualifications and experience.
I'm a '60s shotgun wedding baby. It's a fate that should never be foisted on anyone. My Dad resented my existence, my Mother STRONGLY favoured my younger brother. I was the core of my family's issues around which chaos swirled. I was left in no doubt from a young age that I was unwanted and the root cause of any issue my family unit experienced.
Tom Bilyeu is really on top of all trends.
Correct
That was a good conversation. Unfortunately there are a lot of people that are diametrically opposed these days and it's only getting worse. "I hate you and everybody like you!!!" is getting more and more common. All that's left for weapons to come out then we'll thin out the extremes and maybe we can kind of get along again.
we didn't just take the brakes off women. We took the brakes off and put them on men out of spite. We put quotas in the workplace and school for women. We then reoriented our education system k-12 to suit women.
"we"? no
yes indeed, modern education is built mostly around empowering girls, and to accommodate them. This is done by design, they also got rid of most boy schools and shifted focus away from industrial or trade schools etc.
Exactly, that's what modern leftism is all about. Spite and revenge. "Privilege" is just a smoke screen for saying "you are born biologically evil and must suffer".
It's very difficult not to enter into a name-calling rant after listening to this complete idiocy.
Instead I offer up the following video for anyone who is brave enough to hear the (obvious) truth.
The presenter in the video is a liberal, and also someone I admire and respect. I don't usually respect liberals, but he's' a true believer, not the usual kind of phony. As he repeats in his presentation, "equality means equality for everyone," and he really means that.
The sound quality is somewhat poor. A young woman at the microphone introduces the speaker up to about the 2:45 mark and I could barely understand anything she said. But the speaker doesn't use the microphone and his voice projects. Also the slides he presents summarize his points.
ruclips.net/video/dHNv7i1s_HQ/видео.html
He notes that up to the 1970s boys definitively outperformed girls in education as shown by standardized testing (note carefully: this was before the school system was "dumbed down." If girls are superior to boys, why can't they outperform boys in a competitive education system instead of one where our country comes in last in international comparisons?). So a "girl's crisis" got declared and we moved heaven and earth to help the girls. Now that boys need the help, what's the response? "Boys are stupid, throw rocks at them."
(BTW what would help boys most? Phonics, taught properly, as opposed to the ridiculous "look-say" method. Learning to read early on is key. Look up the PBS series "The Electric Company" from the 1970s. Since that show had stars like Morgan Freeman and Rita Moreno, maybe you should have heard of it.)
I have heard from college age girls they are often disappointed in boys who seem to not have any goals. Especially if the boy still needs his family to help him with tasks of daily life and organization it is not attractive. A boy who seems ro rely on his own Mom still might be an indication the girl will have to treat him as an extra child instead of a helpful 2nd parent for their future kids. Maybe the girls aren't thinking that far ahead so it could be just a natural attraction to more goal oriented independent men.
What goal are the boys working for? A hyper-masculinized, irresponsible 304 that hates men? A girl that will divorce if him once she decides she is "unhappy"? A girl that wants all the power and none of the responsibility?
Boys these days are taught they are evil by their nature. They are taught that their masculine instincts and urges are bad. This is what is taught in the female/feminist dominated public school system. Where is the female responsability in any of this? If men have nothing to work for, they will eventually stop working. I'm honestly amazed that boys are doing as good as they are doing these days. Everyone is against them.
why have goals when the message from everyone and everywhere is "your useless, toxic and unnecessary"
@@SquarishLink just to contradict that message, that's why you need goals.
@@lidiarona4335 I agree completely, I had and do have goals. But this is one thing that itches at the back of my mind.
But i know that's not the message from average women. Most women I interact with have a healthy attitude towards men.
No, we're thinking ahead to having one baby on our hip, whilst picking his underwear off the floor.
I think men them selfs should define how they want to be as women can do now. I e men need a political movement for freedom that is somerhing new. Feminismen cannot do this, that is a lie. A remeber, men already do the hard work with infrastructure that makes modern socity work, no cred what so ever for that today.
Thank you
Don't worry, be happy... doo-doo-dooo, do do do de doooo....
As a feminist, I can say that I love men and I want them to succeed. I wanted an equal, someone who would call me out when needed. I am very lucky that I found a husband who is emotionally supportive but is very masculine and confident and not ashamed of who he is. I hope we are lucky enough to have kids including a son. It would be such a privilege to raise a son who will simultaneously respect and value women but also be a man that is confident in his masculinity. We know that one day he will be someone’s spouse and we think its a great responsibility to raise balanced children.
You are a 1950s feminist. Modern feminism is more cruel
Wait.... How are you a feminist again?
Thank you for this comment 💛 This is true feminism
No hate to feminism, we have to be honest that helping men does not fit into feminism and progressivism at all right now.
You can’t talk about masculinity like that. Young men don’t know how to successfully be masculine while successful femininity is much more attainable
no feminism needed
There are a lot of words in the discussion and comments; no answers to the questions asked is indicative of our international social commentary. Everyone is right and wrong at the same time. Maybe the answer is for modern feminism to be allowed to evolve so that the outspoken feminists agree that they have achieved their goal of seeing women taking their rightful place in society. I am not sure what that rightful place is, but once that is achieved, maybe society will have swung back around to being sensible and the question can be asked about what a boy or man is supposed to be without the narrative being bombarded by the feminine narrative.
The feminism issue being resolved will give clear air to the boy man issue.
I was brought up to put females first and it didn't seem to be a problem then.
Just saying.