The Psychology of Encanto: Luisa's Surface Pressure - Therapist Reacts!
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- Опубликовано: 17 янв 2022
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Psychotherapist Georgia Dow delves deep into the pressure Luisa's under in "Encanto!"
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🤔 What should I react to next ??
You are missing the actual truth. The main theme is intergenerational trauma.
And Intergenerational trauma can be mistaken for other types of traumas. Get this about 70% of the world’s population could be suffering Intergenerational trauma. And about 50% of that 70% are misdiagnosed as other traumas the remaining 35% of the 70% may never ever know if they have it.
Intergenerational trauma is where one is forced to live one way and it becomes so ingrained into their minds that they force it onto their kids. Because of that their kids kids will be forced into that too. The sad thing that it is only a matter of time until someone breaks. Some researchers are now looking at past post stress disorder cases and found out that it might have been intergenerational trauma.
The scary thing is that there is a 45% chance that you could be unknowingly suffering from it. And there is 55% chance that two or more of your friends and family are unknowingly suffering it.
I'd love to hear your perspective on some Pixar movies! (Mainly Soul, Inside Out, A Bug's Life, and the Toy Story movies, but any of their movies would make for an interesting topic!)
*shameless self-promo 😅 but I actually did a Pixar Animation tribute that I'd love to share with you, as well, if you ever have the time to watch it!
im sad. i want to be strong...and you told me not to be. to speak. to talk. to confide in others. I want to do it. i am hoping i can...rather than them turning on me ^_^ wish me luck. and thank u so much for understanding what this is like, understanding the ups, compliments and so on, to the downs of those critiquing you or if u need to take a break. love u so much Georgia-senpai. you're so good at so many things ^^
Georgia you should also watch 'family therapist breaks down encanto family'. It talks about all the personality types on display in the movie.
What I find very interesting about Luisa is that even while she has the 'strong one' personality type she is also a very caring big sister. At every point both in the song and the rest of the movie she either helps Mirabel and looks out for her. Warning her about the barrels she is dropping, fixing her glasses during the song, pulling her away from dangers in the song. She is a way better sister then Isabella who seems to only look down on Mirabel.
@@Excanda I wish Georgia could collab with the therapist reaction couch; that would make my ENTIRE year if she could sit in the middle of them xD
One of the wisest things I've ever heard is this : The only people who will be upset with you for drawing reasonable boundaries are those who were benefitting from you not having any.
love this ! well said
That one hits hard... thanks.
Totally true
100% accurate!
That’s a good saying. They need to hear that in r/aita and entitled people
Exactly. Luisa and Isabella aren't allowed to make mistakes, they have to be perfect and robotic and selfless, and their self worth is based on how useful they are to others. We could see Mirabel giving into this at the beginning, with her excluding herself from the family song, to her overexertion with helping with the party set up. Luisa's song really opened Mirabel's eyes for sure, it helped her to be an advocate for her sisters during the big fight with Abuela
While I think Surface Pressure is a much better song than What Else Can I Do, both of the story threads are incredible at conveying the different ways familial expectations can become onerous.
@@wtimmins I prefer Surface Pressure to because I relate to it more. But I feel like Isabela has the more tragic story in the movie
"I'm so sick of pretty, I want something true"
Love that quote from Isabella so much
The pressure here might not be coming from Abuela directly, but Julieta. Pepa's kids don't impose that kind of perfection on themselves. Julieta is a loving and supportive parent but she's also been modeling this behavior for her daughters. Every time someone has the tiniest hurt Julieta jumps in with healing. After Mirabel sees the cracks Julieta takes the conversation to the kitchen so she can fix Mirabel's scratch without being asked or even really noticing that she's doing it. Luisa learned never to turn down even an implied request for help by watching her mother being the same way.
_None_ of them are allowed to make mistakes. Mirabel is told not to do anything because Abuela thinks she'll just make things worse. Pepa is told to keep her emotions in constantly. Bruno is frowned upon because he simply used his gift, and people didn't like the answers. They all are expected to keep this façade of perfection because Abuela is determined to keep up appearances 24/7.
I think the coolest subtlety about the Hercules fighting Cerberus line, is that Hercules actually never fought Cerberus. He asked help from Hades in his trial to capture Cerberus. Even the hero in that story, the mighty Hercules, knew when to ask for help
damn mind blown ! great
Depends on the telling. Several of them have Heracles wrestling the dog to subdue him but asking Hades for permission first.
@@KaizerRemix pretty sure Disney showed that in the cartoon.
Or was it the movie.
I have memories of this 😅😅
@@MonstehDinosawr Disney didn't exactly stay true to the Greek myths...
@@MonstehDinosawr Actually, it was Kingdom Hearts, in the Hercules movie, Hercules just shot Cerberus a look while going after Meg's soul and Cerberus was like "Naw, ain't fucking with that."
Encanto, roughly translated as: "Personal Attack And Call Out: The Movie"
Also, what you said about "not being a superhero" reminds me of Aunt May's line in Spider-Man (2002) "you're not Superman, you know." He was a literal superhero, and he still needed to be reminded that he can't, or rather SHOULDN'T try and carry as much as he was trying to alone
and even superman cant do it all =)
@@GeorgiaDow That's what I really loved about the Man of Steel version of superman. It really seemed more of a burden than a gift to Clark Kent throughout most of the movie. Maybe worth a closer look?
Yeah, seriously. I haven't had a chance to see it yet, I just got showed this song out of context, and GEEZ, this song is the most massive callout of my life
@@DraycoVideo honestly that's how I ended up seeing the movie 😂
And I love how at the end of the movie when they rebuilt the casita, a hammock was included just to show Luisa finally getting that rest and relaxation that she deserved and so desperately needed throughout the movie.
nice catch I didnt see it
@@GeorgiaDow Yeah, during last minute of the movie when music is playing showing them being free and happy u see Isabela experimenting with colors on her dress and creates a big cactus, Luisa picks it up then Antonio and the donkeys kinda push Luisa to her hammock and the donkey serves her a drink. She makes like a toast because there is snow falling (Pepa dancing with Felix and not minding her cloud at all) It's fast but full of meaning scene. Love it
I love that scene, especially when the donkey brings her a drink
@@gabx0729 it's actually not snow but rather hail
@@gabx0729 I liked that she accepted their push for her to take a break. She could have easily just gotten up and returned to her habits of overexerting herself but her actions narrate that she accepts and is finally willing to indulge in a break.
“Give it to your sister and never wonder if the same pressure would’ve pulled you under” is a line that has haunted me from the moment I heard it. It’s so relieving to see someone who can so accurately represent and describe my struggles. Luisa is a character I truly hold so close to my heart
this
As someone who grew up as a gifted kid, that line “I’m pretty sure I’m worthless if I can’t be of service” hits pretty hard. There was always this expectation for me to be “the smart one” among my peers and siblings. It got to the point where I was terrified of any kind of academic failure, and I was convinced for years that I have to be the smartest person in the room, and that if I’m not smart, I’m nothing. I boiled my self-worth down to people’s perceptions of me, pushing myself to unhealthy extents because I was praised for it. I still have issues with self-esteem and failure.
I relate with this.
I burned myself out with stress because I couldn't perform the way that was expected of me
It's why I relate to Luisa and Isabela most :(
@@MonstehDinosawr same. It’s a curse as much as a gift.
I relate to this so bad
And you've been noticed only when you do something of worth.
This right here
I noticed in the movie that luisa has no trouble lifting anything until her door comes up and she struggles to lift her own door
how fitting isn't it
@@GeorgiaDow yeah
I feel like every older sister could relate to this song. I really wish I had seeped out a therapist prior to my 30s, because I had SO much stress and anxiety that just seemed normal. I balled my eyes out during this song. I just needed Luisa to get help!
it is so well done. I hope things are better
Any older siblings to be exact
As a third child and the youngest. In my family the oldest child got the most attention.The first child is always most exciting, while my parents kinda didn't bother as much by the point they had me. Television raised me. Nobody ever taught me anything.I had to learn everything myself. And to this day no one bothers to explain to me the most basic things I would NEED to know as a freaking adult to be able to normally function in society. Having aspergers doesn't help. I don't know what I don't know.
@@allmigthygoddess939 I think that is a second negativ side effect of the Patents putting so much pressure on their First child.
Yes, they gets a lot of attention. But with that attention come a lot of expectations. For me that was having to got to college and getting a degree, nice Job etc. Beeing academicaly successfull.
Doing something creative, something that i wanted, that went against that idea was simply.... Never an Option.
My younger brother on the other Hand had all the options. He can do what He wants to do. Because the Patents already succeeded in parenting by having a successfull First child.
Its two sides of the same coin in my opinion. Patents making Sure that their First child is 'successfull' but therefore having less time/Ressources to attend the other children... Giving them more options to choose from.
I actually don't relate to this song and I'm kind of ashamed of that fact. All my younger siblings just didn't need me, or at least didn't need me in the only ways I would have been able to help. They were always stronger, smarter, and more competent than I was. They don't really give it much thought but it bothers me. I already didn't have much success with other kids at school so add on not living up to my potential as a big sister and it's no wonder I have so little faith in my worth as a person.
One of the lines that really stood out to me in Surface Pressure is "the ship doesn't swerve when it heard how big the iceberg is" which I read: no one's taking any sort of preventative/precautionary measures because *strong person* can just handle it. Which is shown when NO HOME IN TOWN has a flippin' foundation! Luisa wouldn't need to move bridges/churches/tilt homes back into place if there was just a smidge of city planning going on. Extreme example of what you were talking about with creating a bigger problem by solving everyone else's all the time.
Why should I do the small pile of dishes now when I know you'll spend an hour doing them without complaint if I say I'm feeling too tired later? Would be a smaller, more every day example.
Yeah, that's the major downside of the Madrigal's being the pillars in their community. Because everybody else relies on them for keeping the town running, nobody in the village really knows how to be self-sufficient. There's likely not a lot of people knowledgeable in construction or manual labor because Luisa is strong enough to do it. Julieta's cooking healing any and all ailments negates the need for doctors. But the Madrigals are only people at the end of the day and what's everyone going to do when one day they and their gifts aren't around anymore?
When she dies that town is gonna literally fall apart 😳
Your analysis is beautiful and it is definitely clear the town has grown too reliant on the family, buuuut, I still think you might be wrong here as far as the houses go.
t looked to me (based on the church scene at least) that the buildings are built on slab foundations, which is pretty common in places where the ground doesn't freeze. In case it is called something different elsewhere, a slab foundation is basically where they just pour a layer of concrete, cement, or what have you, and build the home directly on top of that. Since we see her pick up the church and the bottom is solid, that implied to me a slab.
Also, Luisa didn't get her powers until she was, what, 8? I guarantee they built houses regularly at least up until that point and probably a few years after, as there would be an adjustment period for them to become reliant on her power.
All that being said, just shoving leaning houses back into position and straight up MOVEING buildings does mean the ground is either failing and needs to be addressed more directly (for the leaning), or probably will fail (in the case of moving), due to improper prepping.
Same issue as you point out, but different sourse.
I thought the same thing, as well as relying on her for things they can do themselves; YOU DON"T NEED SUPER STRENGTH TO ROUND UP THE FLIPPING DONKEYS! Do it yourself, my dude, Luisa's busy rerouting rivers.
the dishes is such a good example. The woman who adopted me would let the dishes pile up for a month and a half and then would complain about how gross and hard it was to clean them, meanwhile if she had just washed them every week at most it wouldnt be that bad
A long time ago, a school teacher told us students this little tale about the importance of pasuing and resting:
There was once a Arborist (people who cut down trees) who was a hard worker. He would cut more trees and faster than any of his coworker. He would be the first to arive and the last leave.
However, one day he noticed that he was slowing down. He was cutting less trees than his coworkers, even if he was putting in more effort.
Desperate her asked his boss what he was doing wrong. The wise boss replied: "You have beem working so hard in cutting down trees, but have not taken any pause to sharpen your tools".
Good one
very good one indeed
one thing you mean lumberjack... arborist is tree doctor usually
@@Ladywizard English isn't my first language. I just Google People who cut Trees.
@@GeorgiaDow Thanks!
Funny you should say: "You are so much more than your gift" and then end the video talking about Bruno, cause he is actually the first character to give this sentiment with his statement: "I used to say that my real gift was acting." - Which, coincidentally, could very much show that he was always a lovable goofball despite everyone's view of him.
we need to talk about bruno
@@GeorgiaDow Looking forward to talk about Bruno!
We don't talk about Bruno 🤫... but....
Oh that scene with Bruno made me laugh so hard.
"I am Ernando and I'm afraid of NOTHING!"
@@jdprettynails u play castle cats too? nice
I love that Luisa doesn't resent her gift. She genuinely wants to give of herself and help carry the burdens of others because she is capable of doing so. Her crisis is too much being asked of her, not wanting a way out of her role.
Edit: I see the donkeys as a symbol for intrusive requests. They are everywhere in Luisa's song, taking up her time, energy, and focus. The owner could learn to not let the donkeys escape their pen, or handle it himself. I believe at the end of the movie the family builds him a new pen/barn to make sure the donkeys no longer create that burden- a literal boundary for Luisa.
The way the song describes Luisa pressure of failing and letting everyone down it really was her carrying the whole village on her back that she feels like asking for help makes you weak and I love the way it is illustrative in the move and the animation style is amazing
I felt so so bad for Luisa when their house fell over her. She disappeared for a second, everything went silent and Mirabel looked so scared when it happened. It really seemed like she had reached one dangerous limit. And Yeah, that moment ended super fast because Luisa could actually lift the house, but when she did, she said "no mistakes", like, the house, the pressure was crushing her, but she still didn't allow herself to be vulnerable, instead, she pushed herself even harder. It's awful and I felt so sorry for her cause I've put myself in that same position in the past and I know how it feels.
Thank you for making this video, your words are really helpful 🌼.
And then she immediately begins juggling it - the colours turn back from red to blue and it becomes entertainment again, because Mirabel was scared and even when trying to express her own emotions Luisa is still trying to *take away* the burden from her little sister.
@VoidWalkerOblivion that's soo true!! I hadn't think about it like that. Even when she is suffering, she doesn't want to express it in a way that could make her sister feel bad...
The point where she turns her face away from Mirabel like she is ashamed to reveal this weakness to her. And when more weight falls onto her (Before the house) you see Mirabel jump up and have that panic moment that just screams "What do I do" because she wants to help Luisa but can't and then after the house drop it switches because she scared and made Mirabel worried about her and she is not used to that. She is not used to anyone worrying about her now.
That growled "NO MISTAKES" is where my inner critic snuck onto the script.
Seeing Luisa hurt me the most because i saw my sister in her. A good portion of the chores and tasks Luisa does are highly unnecessary too. Like rounding up the donkeys, lifting people off their donkeys, re-routing the river or even moving the church. The village takes advantage of her the most. Like when parents yell and tell you to turn the light of or hand you the remote when they can do it themselves.
“In the end this personality type does it to themselves.” Yes, that’s so important. I can see how it started with Abuela’s coping mechanism, but everyone’s personality influenced the gift they received. Luisa was one of the older sisters in a family that had a huge trauma only a generation earlier - of COURSE she felt internal pressure to protect her family and play the hero, because I’m sure subconsciously, she could see the anxieties plaguing her family.
In hindsight, it’s almost ironic that everyone’s gifts were something perfectly suited to them, but almost none of them were using their gifts in a healthy manner
"gifts were something perfectly suited to them, but almost none of them were using their gifts in a healthy manner" well said
I think julieta was using her gift in a healthy manner
"I glow because I know what my worth is" that was the first red flag for me that clued me into the greater morals of the movie. Like, sure the rest of the song backs that up, but that's the line that ties the song into the greater moral.
yes
As a kid from a spanish house hold it was ingrained in us that we were never supposed to ever say no to the adult figures in the home or family gatherings. Every one my neighborhoods seemed to go with it though it bothered me, so I started to ignore everyone when family started trying to pawn their own responsibilities on me. However thanks to my complex abandonment issues when they would complain to my mother who was our Matriarch I would end up doing the job because as the oldest "I should be setting the example for everyone else". Even so I would ignore till word got to my mother, who I was trying to never disappoint. The end of my tale kinda sucks but because I disagreed with what she wanted me and my sons were told to leave. When I finally saw Encanto and saw Luisa I could hear all my friends joking about how I was Cinderella all over again. I am actually a mix of the characters which doesn't help but Luisas struggles are what really hit hard for me.
I’m from America but I have a very Irish/German household that sounds very much the same. Louisa’s overwhelming feeling that everyone depends on her and Mirabels role as carrying all the family blame both hit me really hard. I have a family member who literally blames me for every bad moment of their life because I was born at a time that was inconvenient for her. I wanted to reply that I was the only person involved with my conception that had no choice in the matter, but instead I just tried harder to please her because that’s what kids and young adults do. My family always needed me for someone to blame if something went wrong and someone to do the household and family work that was deemed too unpleasant for the more worthy members of our family. If I ever complained or acted tired I was torn apart for being weak and whiny and told I should just be grateful that I was getting attention at all.
Same we cannot say no to an elder
I'm from America too, and was told that I should always listen to adults. And if I told my Mom no, I'd get my block knocked off. I relate to Louisa so much cause I'm also the oldest child, so from a young age, I was expected to raise my younger brothers. Like, I've been an unpaid babysitter since I was like, 6.
I was raised exactly the same and told over and over that it was my job to take my mother's place and keep the family together no matter what it took. It took me years of therapy to be able to start setting healthy boundaries and not feel like I was being a bad daughter. I still really struggle with this but at least now I know I was groomed to feel that way so when I feel like I need to fix something that is actually impossible to fix I remind myself that it's actually ok that I don't fix it.
I'm white, from the US, English background probably, and it's the same for me. My inability to say no due to that culture is so bad that when I got into an abusive relationship, I couldn't even say no to sexual stuff I wasn't ready for. Since I didn't actually say no I can't even claim it was rape but I'm traumatized as if it was... (I'm a guy btw)
Though it's weird cos I'm the youngest in my family but everything my dad can't handle falls on me. Mom don't do shit and my brother's only got a couple chores, nothing extra. He was only asked to do the kind of thing I do only once and he basically had a breakdown, so back to me it went. Ofc the suicidal kid should have to deal with it while the other adult brother plays video games... Unlike him I was raised to think my role in life is as a slave
I spoke with my psychologist about this song actually and we had a great conversation about autism, spoon theory, and how trauma can drive people to developing that hero complex. I resonated hard with this song despite being the youngest child and the only person I was trying to protect was myself. That's how you end up in a spiraling meltdown of taking on too much and not being able to say no. The most painful part I'm dealing with now is finding the strength to say no to friends and family and breaking the expectations that I'll do it. Stepping back is terrifying especially when it is loved ones but it has improved my mental health tremendously and allowing me to have more energy and inspiration when it comes to painting.
This!!👏 I related to it so hard too and only through learning boundaries and finding people I can trust did I start letting go a bit and not carrying the weight and feeling the constant need to be a caretaker and please others 😭
I'm the younger sibling and I'm Autistic and adhd and this song hurt me so much and Isabelas song because they reminded me so much of the pain of masking caused me
@Cassandra Tafoya "the simple act of trying to act neurotypical to avoid burdening others makes this sentiment relatable." You really nailed something here--school was a huge burden and offices are a huge burden and commuting is a huge burden and just being part of this noisy, chaotic extroverted society, is a huge effing burden.
What’s spoon theory?
@@annabellhowell5871 There's tons of videos on it by many neurodivergent content creators. Boiled down to its basics; its a thought experiment to help you visualize your limitations or the limitations of others. Say you have a set amount of spoons to use in a day when you wake up. Certain actions take an arbitrary amount of spoons, it varies by person. Maybe in a day you need 20 spoons but you wake up with 30 so you can do extra things like visit friends or go for a jog. But some days the cost of an action might be higher. You may need 40 spoons one day because you're depressed and everything is harder, but you still only had 30 when you woke up. Either some things won't get done or you can borrow spoons from tomorrow. But then tomorrow you'll start with fewer spoons.
It is a very helpful analogy for reframing things in your mind to recognize when you are being pushed or something is asking more of you than normal. Or why someone may struggle with something they normally are fine doing, or that you can do with no problem.
I just noticed: When the domino doors stacked up and threatened the sisters, the final door that toppled over on them was Luisa's own door.
"Other people's expectations are not your obligations" damn, that really stuck out to me. And such great advice. Be your own person, yes help others but not at the expense of your own mental health. There is a way to balance things, and if your plate is so full that you have no more spoons for others, THAT IS OKAY, TOO. Help if you can, but don't neglect yourself and make time for yourself and remember it's okay to say no to people.
appreciate you
I'm so glad you covered Luisa! The tempo & beat to her song really sells that build up tension, with the tick tick ticking clock almost counting down to when she'll finally burst from all the pressure. I felt all her secret anxiety while watching it for the first time. It really hit home.
yes its very accurate
The thing that truly hit me about this song was that, even when Luisa was talking about the pressure continually mounting, it is never shown that she breaks. She doesn't actually think she will break. She thinks she can handle it all. But it is the fear of that belief being proven false that overwhelms her. She isn't actually breathing hard because of the weight, she is nearing a panic attack because she is afraid of what it will mean if she suddenly loses her indestructability. I've been here. I've been the guy to carry burden and trauma for others that it seemed nobody else could, and it made me feel good and powerful to be hurt but keep going. There was a part of me that constantly wondered, and secretly hoped, that one day I would actually just collapse. But I never did. And that wasn't good. This song absolutely broke me, because it isn't about Luisa not being strong enough, it is about her realizing that part of strength is actually being willing to sit down and let the world move itself.
She won't physically break, but she's mentally very close to that point.
To me when she says the lines “pressure like a drip drip drip that’ll never stop” and “pressure that’ll tick tick tick till you just go pop” just kind of explains how it’s not just one situation or two that builds up that pressure, but it’s more like overtime others expectations constantly rising and you trying to meet them that eventually leads to being crushed under their weight. This entire movie broke me down, it’s very relatable to my family situation, only my family members are not self aware lol
One of the amazing details of the song is that Luisa can lift everything up, the world, the family, anything that comes her way.... Except her gift as shown at 13:08
While I, like thousands of others, relate so heavily to this song, my absolute favorite thing about it is that not once does Mirabel look afraid of Louisa.
There are so many characters in media that are Louisa but everyone around them is just a little bit afraid of them *because* of their strength. They use the Louisa character for their strength but there's an underline of fear that keeps them from asking the Louisa about the Louisa's problems.
But then here's Mirabel. Who asks her what's wrong. Granted at first it is about the magic but she asks in a way that speaks of concern of why Louisa herself is worried. And at the end once Louisa spills all her issues, Mirabel leans into her hug. All throughout the song Mirabel clings to Louisa, showing she is clearly unafraid of her sister and is actually relying on her and knows Louisa will keep her safe. Then she not only hugs her but Mirabel leans into it until Louisa picks her up and then she just lets Louisa cling to her.
It's just so refreshing to see a Louisa type character in an actual loving family where, despite the super strength, they do not fear them. It's just so nice.
*Luisa
Well done, as usual! Luisa just makes you want to give her a hug and tell her it'll be okay! I thought you would be interested in Encanto when I noticed how each character's gift matched to a family archetype (Dolores = quiet listener, Julieta = nurturer, Luisa = the strong one...). Looking forward to your takes on the others!
nice yes
I really wish they spent more time with Camilo. How would it feel growing up and being told you’re only useful when you’re someone else? What kind of identity crisis would being a teenage shapeshifter cause? Yet so often we see him as this caring son/brother/cousin. I also LOVE his part in “We don’t talk about Bruno”. Every character in this film deserves more time in the spotlight. I don’t care if the movie is 7 hours long
@@joolzian2510 Apparently the creators confirmed him to be a theater kid so maybe he lets out his emotions through theater? Idk I would love to see his struggles, because he was always mischievous but caring.
@@joolzian2510 Camilo could end up in the most hurtful downwards spiral of them all, if no one takes care of him for him. Always being the guy who helps others to relax and laugh, always putting on a mask while doing so, no one ever sees who you are, just who you are for them while handling dozens of different personas.
@@joolzian2510
I think at one point they debated having Camilo be unrecognizable to his family when his powers went away because he even shape shifted his everyday body. They ended up not going through with that in the movie but that’s an incredibly sad concept :(
As a big sister, I'm basically Luisa. I have always been expected to carry weight that even adults couldn't, even when I was 11 years old. When my grandmother died I was made to hold off on mourning properly so that way I could help my siblings, mom and other relatives to get through it. I didn’t properly grieve until I five years had gone by and I was in therapy.
Now, I'm pulling away from the toxicity of my family and my girlfriend is there for me. She's been my support system for the last seven years. But, I don't think I'll ever fully break away from the mentality of *"I can handle it. I have to handle it, because no one else will."* through therapy though, I'm mapping out how I want to raise my own children. I don’t want them to go through what I did to the best of my ability, and I have to understand that I'm going to mess up, I'll make mistakes, but I can do my best to not put so much pressure on my children.
That I can handle it, I have to. I resonate with that too well, Im the baby of the family the last child but I'm the rock despite 5 brothers. I sacrifice alot for my family and I was raised to never ask anyone for anything if I didnt have I would do without. This song made me realise I m always wishing for someone to give me a hug and tell me it's gona be okay. Disney knows how to relate to people I'll give them that lol
I feel that, especially the point about your mourning. When my aunt died, who was basically like a mother, I had to stomach everything that I was feeling, be there for my mom and my other aunt, the sisters of the deceased, make sure everything was in order and be kind of a scapegoat for my dad, who's a very irritable, but rarely vulnerable person, who just pour out his anger onto others. I still have nightmares about that time, even though it's been almost 3 years.
I'm experiencing this now actually. My aunt died but I've been busy leaving myself behind to help everyone else grief because I have to be the emotional support for everyone because if I'm not no one else will be and now another family member died a week ago and I gotta tuffen up to help them get through this now to
Just finished watching it yesterday and everyone was right the whole family was going through something
Where did you watch it?
@@jolt.l Encanto
I liked that the movie addressed this problem further, after Luisa had already agreed that she should probably take it easy a bit more. Because usually in a narrative that would probably be the end of that discussion, but then later Luisa comes home in tears and laments how she felt really bad for 'letting everyone down'. It's a process.
This song...made me realize some things about myself. I'm always the rescuer. Even my parents were financially dependent on me. My mom vented to me about her issues, yet I feel like I can't do the same. There's this expectation from my family and friends that I'll always be the stable and put together one. The success of the family and when I feel like I'm not doing enough, it HURTS. The guilt from failing at something is real.
similar situation. My mom always vented to me, asked me what to do about my brother doing bad things, and how to raise him even when I was only a preteen myself. She still does. She always complains to me about him but never to him. He is the golden child and she would never say anything bad to him. All the criticism of him and me and everyone falls on me.
I love how constantly in this song, Luisa is trying to protect Mirabel. It'd be enough pressure having to do all of these things, but then add someone you love to the equation (like one's younger sister or entire family), and it's worse.
I really identified with Luisa in this because I used to feel a lot of those pressures, maybe in a slightly different way. After I burnt out and really sort of broke down after failing to do something I had expected myself to do (go to grad school) I had to learn to balance my needs with the grand expectations I had for myself. I was really happy to see that struggle reflected in Luisa and wished we got to see more of her on screen.
she did resonate a lot as a good representation
This movie is a great repetition of generational trauma and how it affects different people. Abela lost her husband and home at a young age and she was afraid that something would hurt her family that she held on too tight that she didn't see that they were suffering.
It was wild relating so hard to her cause I'm the youngest, but I was raised to be the people pleaser and emotional support dog of the family💦 when I started saying no to things I was called selfish and self centered 😭 Its why I'm distant from my family now
I am sorry that happened to you. I hope it is better now
6:13 parentalification of the older child. I can attest to that right now. Ever since my sister was born with a condition where she could stop breathing, I was, at age 3, tasked with spending all my time watching my sister. I had to constantly check to see if she's breathing and if not, start doing rescue breathing to get her back to breathing. This lasted until I was six after Mom finally found a doctor willing to do more than tell her to either medically coma my sister for life or plan a funeral.
Turns out she had fluid build up around her lungs and it was crushing them. After draining the chest cavity, she was normal but by this time Mom got very used to me watching my sister constantly.
Even to the point that she turned my bedroom into a storage area and had me move in with my sister so that I could help her whenever she wanted anything at all.
I'm so sorry that happened to you. I pray for you as well as your sister's well being. No child should ever have to literally BE the parent of their siblings.
@@kaytlinjustis5643 not even a parent like a full blown nurse!
Yes, we need to talk about Bruno. Since there’s so much on why we need to talk about him.
we will
@@GeorgiaDow pls explore ocd tendencies for him.
I was looking forward to this episode as soon as you started covering Encanto. I connected with her the most. It wasn't until lately that I've started to pull back and say No, which had lead to a couple nasty clashes. But, like you said, gotta teach them to fish on their own.
Amazing content as always. Keep it up! Can't wait for the next one!
keep saying no =)
As the oldest child, I related to Louisa a lot.
@@420catboi its spelled luisa :)
Thanks so much this video! As an older sibling, I understand Luisa's pressure to be strong constantly, and carry the whole world on my shoulders, to be perfectly relatable. "Surface Pressure" made me weep so much, as it epitomises the struggle to be mentally and physically strong, but want someone to help you every now and then. 💪💯
stay strong care for you
Im an oldest child too
I love how you always match your outfit to the character you're analyzing
thx for noticing
I'd be really interested to hear your views on some of the less often discussed characters, the ones whose struggles aren't plot relevant. I'm thinking specifically of Camilo (whose gift makes him of most use when he's literally anybody but himself) and Julieta (whose gift forces her to become responsible for the town's physical well being).
I am the older sister and I relate to Luisa a lot, I've always been the 'smart one', the 'brilliant'. People put expectations all the time and you are afraid that if you don't meet them you won't be love anymore, specially if affection was conditioned, Luisa is a great character and I loved hearing your analysis.
I really wish she had something about the finale part of the song, after the house falls on Luisa. When I first watched Encanto this song had me crying within the first minute because I identified with it so much. I feel like the way Luisa recovered after finally picking up the house and seeing her sister's face really shows how that dopamine from this super human ego works for people with Luisa's persona.
One of the things I love is how Mirabelle supports everyone going through their crisis by mirroring their actions. It's really scary to change in isolation.
She didn't need a gift because she was already a gift
I used to carry this personality type without realizing it, I was certainly parentified and had to give up my childhood - it was extenuating circumstances. And I had to move far from home in order to see what was happening and reorient what my worth was. It was really hard at first because I felt like I couldn't rescue my sibling or my parents anymore, I couldn't hold them together like I felt I should have. But being away, and my parents encouraging me to become my own person without these responsibilities has opened my eyes to so much about myself. I'm still working myself out here and It will take a long time for me to unlearn those childhood ideals, but I feel so much relief now compaired to before.
Hope you enjoy that childhood reclaimed now
As someone who is seen as “the strong one” I can say that I feel that her issues are not driven by ego. It’s about service and fear for those that rely on you. Not fear of not being strong because of ego, it’s fear that if you fail everything around will fall apart and those you care about will get hurt. You are told that in order to be good and to do the right thing you must serve and protect. If not the consequences could be harmful and it’s all on you. That’s the pressure and the fear that the grandmother put on everyone. It’s pretty much the main issue of the movie. Which is why I don’t think she is ego driven, I think she is driven by fear and love. She is giving her all for others, not herself l, hence the lyrics “I hide my nerves, and it worsens, I worry something is gonna hurt us”. Service and duty taken too far from being put under that pressure from an authority figure. Feeling that I have to do it near perfect is not because of ego, every time I would take it easy things would fall apart and people would get hurt. I don’t think it’s always our own fault, based upon real consequences that came from not carrying the weight we can see the results of a lack of vigilance, which scares us into trying to not let disasters happen on our watch again. Ego can be an issue for people, but because of the grandmother’s fear mongering and traumatizing of poor Luisa, I don’t think that ego is her driving force. Not to mention the intergenerational trauma and the fear of the marauders that could be looming just past their mountains.
I'm the youngest in my family but from childhood to adulthood I relate to Luisa and mirabel the most! I constantly feel like I have to carry the weight of my families burdens with a smile just to keep the peace but the only person who really sees me is my partner. Sometimes without that pressure I feel worthless. Luisas line "I'm pretty sure I'm worthless if I can't be of services." Yeah I felt that
The Luisa character was a really sneaky way of addressing aspects of toxic masculinity.
truth
@@GeorgiaDow I just read that the Disney folks greatly underestimated the popularity of the Luisa merchandise which is vastly outselling the Isabella dolls they imagined would be more popular. It is great to see that the strong (yet sensitive) archetype is finally getting recognized as something to aspire to in girls as well as boys.
Specifically how toxic masculinity can affect girls and women, because WHOA BOY, do I relate to Luisa, and could I ever talk for a few eons about the subtle, insidious ways patriarchy and toxic masculinity work to inform women and fem folk in general's behavior.
Not just in a... well an Isabella way tbqh, of being small, and graceful, and perfect obvi, but in a Luisa way too, wherein you rejected, and are capable of seeing, the harmful tropes associated with femininity. You were all ready to dodge those and live a better life for it sure... but then you fall directly into harmful tropes usually applied to masc folk instead, because... well because of a lot of complicated reasons really.
You KNOW it's toxic too, but even then, you take some extra PRIDE in the fact that you're living with them, because at LEAST you're proving that the gender binary and expected roles aren't remotely as simple and straightforward as society wants them to be! And that makes it all the harder to set boundaries and be okay with not being invincible, because you worry that if you fail, it would be taken as proof that they're "right" about women's capabilities and roles. (Which is bullshit of course! You're only human! But that doesn't stop the anxiety from creeping in.)
I really loved the imagery of Luisa not only relating to Hercules, but taking up his mantle even when he ran away. That felt painfully poignant to me.
@@valkyrie-randgris Honestly, I see it as being a great example of why (modern) feminism is toxic. Feminism tells women to be "strong and independent" when really, people are TOO strong and independent nowadays! It's not shameful (or even feminine) to rely on others, it's a bad thing to be "strong and independent". Of course you should be able to handle yourself to an extent but it's okay to ask for help and you SHOULD have people in your life who can support you when times are hard. It's only when you're alone where you should be THAT strong and independent, and that's a tragedy, not a point of pride
Men have been dealing with this mentality for decades. It's only recently being realized how hard we're buckling under it, probably in part due to feminism telling women to be more like men in ways that no person should really be doing.
I do slightly wish she'd been male, just because I think a song like surface pressure would be perfect for what men go through all the time, with very few people actually considering how THEY feel, only considering how it impacts others. But I also love her design and like the showcasing if excessive physical strength in a female character, so, as perfect as the song is for a majority of men, I still love how it is too
@@vaughnhaney7020 no
Early in my marriage I was like luisa. Panicked lying about everything being fine. The lies ended up making our problems worse and almost ruined everything.
It was this movie that taught me the human concept of being a knight. Completely dedicated to a person, and a cause. This is what you must become: brave, selfless, loyal, *a knight!*
One thing I love about the art in this song is that even in her image spot, Luisa is helping in tiny ways. When they come off the sinking ship, she fixes Mirabel's glasses on her face. It's such an understatement moment, but it encapsulated the idea that Luisa can't not help, all the time, even for trivial things that people can fix themselves, like resetting your own glasses.
I love this song and I hate how relatable it is, that dreadful feeling of inadequacy.
Great video as always
It's funny because, the first time I listened to this song, I empathised, but felt I didn't relate so much. And that's because I'm on my 3rd college attempt. I've already failed again and again and again. I'm no one's hero.
But the more I listened the more I realised that the song still rings true. My ADHD makes school near impossible for me and its only been getting worse. I wish I could shake the growing weight, and just feel light, but there is so much expectation.
I need to get a degree if I want to immigrate to a good country where I can be myself. It all hurts. So many suicide attempts, I'm trying my best to do more but I feel that I'm not built for it. I wish I was strong like Luisa.
You are strong, you've already made it this far and I'm sure you'll make it even farther. 💕💕
I hope you have good support around you and that you feel less alone. Thank you for being here and sharing. Do not give up, falling down we all do but you have each time gotten up, please remember that when times get tough. You are stronger than you know after all you have been through.
Last year I wrote a book for my daughter’s 2nd birthday called Minnie the Mighty. I really wanted to help her learn a different idea of what might is. The first half focuses on the typical facets of might: being strong, brave and victorious. Then the second half turns it around and reframes might as showing compassion, asking for help and learning to make mistakes.
Hearing you say personalities like Luisa refrain from asking from help really hits home.because it took me so long to learn that skill. Hopefully I can pass that along to my daughter.
When you said "You matter" I cried. I really wish my person that is angry at me would see what they are causing like Abuela did....the most unrealistic part in Encanto. And cried more when you said "You don't have to be the strong one to be loved or cared about" Today has me feeling like I am not strong enough. thank you.
Sending you love you wonderful soul! ❤
I wish my "Abuela" would see the harm she causes my family too. 😔
@@AlottaBoulchit thank you for your kind words.
😭 na i teared up too
I’m in love with Encanto! When I first heard this song all I could think about is how this song is an extremely male experience. When my father died I was 12 years old he told me I would have to be the man of the house, and so did many members of my family. And I see this in soooo many men, we’re taught that our value is in providing and being victorious. But we’re also discouraged from exploring our emotions, reaching out and asking for help, and engaging in self care. Those things are seen as the antithesis of masculinity. It’s sooo unsustainable.
I’m definitely not saying women don’t experience this either, I know many women who’ve experienced this. Just saying this is sadly par for the course for many men. I felt SOOO seen listening to this!
Another great video thank you :)
As an eldest sibling i feel this to the core.
I love how later in the song when she is singing about the pressure she looks down and away as to hide her fear/shame from her sister.
thank you
Very tangential, but Marvel dropped the “Moon Knight” trailer and it looks like it’ll be a psychological thriller as well as a superhero show; highly recommend you pencil that show in for a therapist reaction!
ill look into it
Agreed. Moon Knight's dissociative identity disorder should be pretty interesting to see on screen, but it'll probably take a couple episodes of the show's release before there'd be enough material to comment on.
I absolutely adore luisa, this song made me laugh so much but also brought tears to my eyes because she really seemed to be struggling a loot. As the older sibling I understood this.
One detail I really loved to notice was that Luisa didn't lose her gift because she decided to take it easy on herself, but it was when she felt guilty for taking a small break, regressing back to that old "no mistakes, no breaks for me" mindset, and THATS what broke the camels back.
God I feel exactly like Luisa. I learned I was doing this because of Steven Universe and I'm trying to learn boundaries, but it's freaking hard. At my last internship I was drowning and knew I needed a day off. I got my vaccine for Covid and knew it would make me feel like crap so I'd have an excuse for a day off. I tried to ask, but while I was asking my bosses asked if I'd be able to stay and I just couldn't say no. I was breaking down that whole day, but it took them half the day to realize I needed to go home. Then the next day my higher boss found out what happened and I got fired for staying when I was sick, which because of a huge lack of communication at that job I didn't know was even a rule. It doesn't help that my coworkers had worked while sick and didn't seem to get in trouble. That place was honestly a mess.
Them firing you is a THEM problem not a YOU problem. It just show that THEY are horrible bosses that shift blame instead of taking responsibility for their worker’s wellbeing. And don’t let ANYONE tell you otherwise. I am so sorry that happened to you…
I'm staring to think Luisa shares some similarities with Steven.....
This breakdown really just helped me out. Processing a lot right now. All good stuff. Realizing I'm past the pressure stage and able to hop in the hammock myself finally. Didn't realize where all the burnout feeling was all coming from. Thank you so much for this.
I've gone to therapy for a lot of these problems. Louisa's song still made me cry, now you're making me cry all over again. Honestly it's a strange catharsis.
How does one know if the amount of help they offer to others healthy or not? How does one know if the amount of support they agree to take is justified and not excessive? How does one find the right balance between giving and receiving?
if you have to sacrifice your happiness or rest to help people then that's probably unhealthy. of course the minor inconvenience of helping out is normal, but other than that is a bit much
well said and your levels of stress
Luisa would be lucky to have you as a therapist. I'm always looking forward to your videos! I love Luisa's character I can't help but heavily relate to her like most
aww thanks
Wow so captivating to hear your take this segment of the movie. Always so fascinating how Disney manages to make such relatable segments maybe that's one of the reasons they are so successful. Cried like a lil baby during this song what a relief to see you talk about it, thanks.
Thank you, Georgia! I really needed that! I had immediately gravitated to the song and then found your video. I’ve been “rescuing” so much at my job for so long it has just become normal. I’ve been feeling seriously burned out after a 20 day straight marathon. Thank you for helping me see the light. You do amazing work!
As I'm watching this, I'm thinking of previous videos you made about Arcane and I feel like Vi has a lot in common with Luisa. She was responsible for parenting Powder, Mylo and Claggor under Vander at such a young age and carries everyone's burdens on her shoulders. She was never able to allow herself to just be a child. Her slipping up meant someone could die and I really feel for her. I think what I like about her relationship with Caitlyn is that Cait is such a nurturing person that she's able to just let Vi breathe for a moment the way Mirabel does for Luisa.
I've been in therapy for five or six years now and I hugely struggled with external worth and not feeling I have intrinsic worth, I started therapy for both anxiety and falling chronically ill so I really struggled, but it finally fell into place in the past year and now I truly like me for me. It's really nice and honestly something I didn't think could happen. For all the people relating to this song I definitely recommend working on viewing yourself as a person in your own right, with a therapist if you can afford that. It's very hard to divorce worth from actions but it's great when you get there.
I had the conversation "you don't have to save the world" with my therapist and I was like "but it needs saving and no one else is doing it, if I don't do it we're f'ed!" and like objectively now I can see that's ridiculous, but it was genuinely how I felt. You have to let bad things happen sometimes for your own health.
Yes! I'm so glad you adressed this character specifically, there was so much to say about her! And as someone who still feels like my worth is based on how big of a work I can manage to do by myself, 1) without asking anyone for help (because then I'd feel like I'm a fake and don't meet others' expectations), and 2) without ever saying no to anything because my boundaries are blurry, this was really interesting to watch!
On your Encanto video I commented how much I love the way you talk about/and to the people that might feel related to what you’re analyzing, so when I saw this I kinda pushed it through the day because ever since I watched the movie I felt SO related to Luisa and yes, I felt as if we just had a very real and nice conversation. I do take therapy and I’ve worked a lot of things so you made me realize how much I’ve accomplished with myself. I came to the US (I’m from Mexico) a few months ago and that decision was a tough one because as the oldest sister I was feeling that pressure of leaving my siblings and wondering how they could do it without my help and feeling guilty for even thinking about leaving… but here I am and the weight leaving my shoulders felt as if I was breathing for the first time in years… this just got way too long. Just wanted to say thank you for this video and those words you “told Luisa” made me cry a little
i couldn't have watched this at a more perfect time. i relate to luisa a lot; i have a lot of issues with saying "no" and wanting to do everything for everyone despite how exhausted it makes me. my therapist and i had a great conversation about this lately, and learning how to take care of myself is something i'm still working on. there's something that really touched me about seeing a character in a movie -- a disney movie, nonetheless -- go through something i and a lot of other people deal with, and it makes it feel so much less lonely to know that i'm not the only person with this issue. lovely insight!
YES!! I WAS WAITING FOR THIS VIDEO!!!
welcome
Thank you for the complete analysis!
You are great
I like this breakdown about Luisa! And it puts in the importance of boundaries and self-love!
This song really spoke to me. I currently have a burn out. And yes I do put a lot of pressure on my own shoulders. Sure there is outside pressure, but not nearly as much as my own internal "I have to do this". There isn't even an or else, it's just a statement in my head.
Thankfully I have the help to work through this. At least I'm past step one, recognizing this is even a thing I do.
Donkeycorns... absolutely necessary.
Truth
I’m currently a Psych major with a minor in Film and Television and your videos have been a godsend to helping me more firmly understand a lot! Thanks!
This song hit me very hard. I was in this spot a couple of years ago. Luckily i realised when nearing my limit i needed to think more about myself, exactly like you say, so i did. The relief i felt was enormous and i feel a lot better today focusing on what makes me happy in life.
4:00
Talking about weakness in heroes…
I write fan stories, and one time a commenter mentioned how it was nice to see these people-probably that even they looked up to-being shown as imperfect. It HELPS, even if me and that person both knew it was fanfiction.
Something about seeing fictional characters get help almost makes it easier to say “hey, I also need help”. That may be why I, as well as many others, like a troupe including people rallying together when the characters crumble.
It’s what makes Marvel great. Because those super heroes have flaws. They have desires and drives that we KNOW are unhealthy and even can resonant with.
Real cool how people have created stories with messages to help with our mental health and terrible mindsets. I’ve actually learned a lot about how to treat/interact with others through reading stories.
I actually needed this at this moment. Thank you!
hope it helped
I love watching these video. I started watching this channel when she was covering Arcane, and she's made me appreciate these shows all the more.
thank you
Literally choking up from stress and anxiety listening to you break this down.
I relate to an exponential level.
I love looking through the comments and seeing everyone word vomiting their experience and how this song, and this video, is helping them understand their own issues. Great video 👍
For me, I'm in awe at the part of the song where the house completely crushes her. For a moment, you're realizing that this kind of pressure has a very real possibility of erasing who you are as a person, and even killing you when going so far. It's very morbid, for a second, but I think that's warranted, even in a kids movie, to portray that there is a point when you have gone way too far.
I like that she isn't fixed just by singing a song about her feelings. She's still distraught all throughout the movie, but she has family members who she loves and who love her regardless of how useful she is with her. If there's a continuation, I'd love to see how her character develops even more.
I identified with Luisa the most. I feel the burnout every single afternoon and feel so guilty. Bieng a mom, a homeowner, living with my husband and mom and trying to make them both happy because they occasionally clash but only tell me about it not eachother. Plus being the only one in the household that speaks English, I take care of all the bills and things to do with the home. And when I'm not home and I'm working, well, I work HR so I'm also always busy fixing things for everyone at work. So after all this, my son and I get the short end of the stick because when I get home at night I'm too burnt out to give him and myself the attention we need. 😩
Wow, some of the ways you explained this has really hit home. I’ve got some work to do thank you 💪🏼🙌🏻
(Still listening) You may legitimately save lives with this video. ❤️
I love your content! I’m very into lyrical analysis and I love how you broke down the song 😊
its such a good song
my first go to with her line of "pressure like a drip drip drip that'll never stop" is the infamous "chinese water torture"; and as the older sister under immense amounts of pressure, that line was the one that hit me first, because that's really what it feels like after long enough--even though that small little drop of water is grating on your nerves, eventually you just accept it as part of your life, that if it was going to stop it would have stopped by now, right? it breaks you, it gives you basically no hope for the future because you will have no peace as long as that drop is there.
I'm really amazed how Disney represented Colombia and more specifically, each and every region.
I'm from Luisa's region (Boyaca) and not only her outfit is accurate, but also her character, we
are people with strong character and determination to the point that we are perceived as a combination
of tough and rude (toscos), but at the end of the day we are people that always do what has to be done
for our land and family.
"I am their pillar, if i crumble, they fall, and i can't let that happen" is a mindsett i lived with untill i litterally broke my body and could no longer support myself, i'm still there mentally, but i struggle to accept my physical handicap, so i relate to Luisa and her anxieties, and her fear of loosing it all! great character, and great analasys! thank you for making content like this!
“Give it to your sister and never wonder, if the same pressure would’ve pulled you under.”
Being taken for granted, when you’re trying your hardest to do what they can’t, or won’t, is very hurtful.
Thank you for your insightful video!
P.S. I like how you alerted your blouse to resemble Luisa’s. 😊
Thanks for another great reaction video. I appreciate your viewpoint as a therapist. Blessings on your day.
blessings your way
Hi Georgia! You make a great point about extrinsic self-esteem. You're right, it's not sustainable if it doesn't come from within. I learned this the hard way. Sometimes I've focused too much on productivity and results (and worrying about what others think) than enjoying what I do.
I also agree, that the self-inflicted pressure and pushing oneself hard and not allowing room to feel worried, show vulnerability, etc takes a toll. And I totally agree, it takes courage to show vulnerability and to do something that you're scared about.
And you're spot on, we all have limits and need to set boundaries. Your video spoke to me. I try to do too much sometimes. I can relate a lot to Luisa and to what you're saying too. I'm working on pressuring myself less, focusing more on enjoying life, taking care of myself, and setting boundaries.
Excellent video, Georgia! You rock!
PS. Your cosplay is awesome as always!
thank you
@@GeorgiaDow Anytime :) Keep up the wonderful work! :)
I just found you through encanto reacts and I'm so glad I did because I honestly was looking for this type of indepth analysis on people/characters
Instant subscription from me 😊
I love this song so much, I relate to it as as the oldest sibling. I also love this song because during it, Louisa is going out of her way to help Mirabel, like she would straighten her glasses and brush her down, make sure she's good before moving on to the next thing.
OH MY GOSH YESSSS! I’ve been waiting for this video and I’m sure that it’s gonna be great! :D
Will you do one for abuela? The movie touched on grief and generational trauma so good
maybe so
This song makes me break down right now.
I’m literally this character with my life, but as a mom instead of a sister.
I’m working with a therapist, but it sucks when you feel everything is on your hands and you’re trying everything within your power not to drop it.
I'm so excited to see more single character videos, especially Bruno and Pepa!