Be Careful Who You Call “Friend”
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- Опубликовано: 24 июл 2024
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00:00 INTRO
04:42 BETTERHELP
06:36 STORY TIME
21:32 RECATEGORIZE YOUR FRIENDS
32:13 SINGS OF A BAD FRIEND
39:00 YOU DONT NEED 100 FRIENDS
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Развлечения
Real talk there are friends and then there are associates. As one gets into adulthood it's not like childhood where everyone you see you want to play with and be friends. Some adults can be very vindictive and demonic
Vindictive and demonic. We’ve really painted a picture there, you’re not wrong though 😂😂
This comment is 1000% FACTS!
Some KIDS can be vindictive and demonic
A lot of girls or women are straight up narcissists! They try to pretend like it’s just men but I’ve noticed that women are more narcissistic than men
So true I agree ❤
Insecure women are unfortunately never good friends. No matter how much they might try or think they are. I wish more women understood the importance of building their own confidence, for so many reasons, themselves, relationships with men, friendships, etc but some people don’t want to grow out of toxic mentalities and you can’t do that for them. And you’re correct that having older women in your corner makes me feel very blessed. I would say my ‘core’ is my mum and her best friend. All of my other friends are people who have truly beautiful characters, even if we only share 1 or 2 things in common.
This is wonderful!
Thanks for your contribution ❤
Childhood trauma and more.
💯💯💯💯
Never. Their insecurities and inferiority complex doesn't allow them to be good friends/people. The insecurities always dictate how they behave. No matter how good you are to them it makes no difference.
Thank you for saying this !! I have been feeling something about someone for a while and I think this is it
I’ve learned over the years to see the signs of a “friend” who is trying to rush intimacy and bond with me super fast. It actually gives me anxiety now rather than feeling validating.
Those people 100% every time, cause drama and do the MOST to use and abuse.
It’s a “hell no” from me.
I agree, this is why I do consider people trying to connect to me with trauma bonding or trauma dumping in the beginning stages kinda raises a red flag to me. Scares me little and not because of being afraid to opening myself but more so on creating a space to stay in the past or be in a negative place.
@@hotgirlinbed 💯 🚩
Agreed!! Wanna be BESTIEEEEE right away like relax
Nope. Push them back.
@@Datb2 exactly. No beasties. Waste of time.
I sometimes feel like making new friends. Then, I take a nap and get over it.
😂 I love this. Sometimes you just need the clarity of rest
😂 Word !
Waw 😂💀
One thing I learned about “friendship”
1. If a girl look at me up and down
2. tryna look like me. Buying same stuff. I will run!
3. If she talks with friends of mine or start following people that I know maybe on social media. Run!
4. If she’s is not opened like me
5. Never trynna listen to what I have to say just telling story’s about herself
6. When she don’t like u for getting more attention from others specially guys
7. If she only talk more with dudes. Big red flag 🚩
8. If I warn you about a guy and even defend you from people who talk shit behind yo back and u still messing with them.. girl
Bye blocked forever.
I rather be alone. Some women won’t like you because u just carry that good Energy/shine within you. No matter how friendly you are wish pisses them off even more 😮 Don’t be sad just move on and be proud about it 😅
Get a “friend” who’s exactly like you. Someone who will motivate you and whom u can learn from. Be there for each other. If that’s not the case shit won’t last or make sense.
The frustrating thing is this list is 8/8 true but i can't find one single person without these traits.
8 is a big one and why i just cut ties with a REALLY close friend. She basically told me my advice would yo in one ear and out the other but in the same conversation said she valued me🚩 I love sis but no
This is why I wouldn’t want to connect with an “old friend”. If we don’t talk today, there’s probably a reason for it 👀 …it’s fine that people change but I’m just not interested!
This! Every old friend that came back only wanted to use and take advantage of me again. You always leave the past in the dust where they belong!
@@slayfaee 👏🏾
Yeah , I’d be like “ I’m glad you changed but no thank you, but be a good friend to someone else" when I’m done , I’m done done
Same
Same
I have never had "real" friends which breaks my heart to the core. I truly pray for a deep and meaningful sisterhood friendship. I feel what you are saying 😭
Same girl , you're not alone! All the best in finding your sisterhood tribe
Sis you and me both. At this point, God is my all.
Me too i wish i had friends
Literally 🤣😭
Don't worry about it. Love yourself and God.
Yes people can be jealous of you because you have nice things that’s absolutely true if you have a nice house if you have a nice car, a partner who loves you, if you have family that love you people can be jealous of that, also they can be jealous of you because you have a good attitude about yourself, a good relationship with yourself, if you are confident in yourself and have good things going for you. People can envy you for many things it’s not just materialistic!
The worst is when other people say “Can’t you just make amends with them? People make mistakes.”
Nah. A mistake is when you ask someone to bring back the top they borrowed and they forget to before coming to your house.
Spreading cruel lies, sabotage and throwing shade is intentional.
Can’t be friends with someone who’s intentionally mean. Not at this big age. May God remove the jealous, callous and wicked from our lives and make way for kind-hearted people❤
Amen!!!
Ameeennn
I agree with every word.
Yesssss 🙌🏾🙌🏾
Amen I had this experience with a so-called friend. She was insecure about her appearance and she would throw shade just to make her feel better about herself.
It hurts when u realise u are approaching 30 and have no friends... and no relationship... and no family (they live overseas) its another level of crippling depression and loneliness I tell u... I may have to try out the better help u mentioned😢
same here
I think its all about perspective...what does 30 mean to you?
We have so many expectations for 30 as if its the end of our lives...just go out more... you'll make friends. And be your own friend. Be God's friend.
Gurl you are breathtaking. Thank you for discussing this topic. I have had a lot of failed friendships and have decided to take a huge step back to evaluate the role I played in the friendship and then the other person. I’ve learned to take my time and really evaluate the person’s character before I can call them a friend. I lean heavily on the Holy Spirit to discern if the person is supposed to be in my life and vice versa.
Amen girl!
Definitely the season I’m in right now too God has really exposed so much to me, now in a time of waiting for him to provide the friendships that he has for me.
@@evda4919 oh my goodness! Im in the same exact place rn. With Jesus I have everything and everyone I need. Until He chooses to bless me with other people, I’m good. I’ve lost all my friends but I’m at peace and content now.
Why do you think is the reason you lost all of your friends?*@@janicemwangi8560
@@mmaya772 It happened mainly because I began to take my life with Christ more seriously. Also, learning and knowing my worth + cultivating self love. I realized I was settling because I felt like people were doing me a favor by being my friend.
My standards were so low because I wanted to be accepted and to fit in. I was constantly ignoring my needs and boundaries to keep other people comfortable and when I stopped (started communicating my needs and boundaries), the “connections” just began to fade away slowly but surely.
It’s sad but I’m okay and feel free. I’ve upgraded and I wouldn’t have it any other way. No shade to all the people who are no longer my friends. I still have mad love for them and pray for them often.
Thanks for asking 😊
I recently experienced a friendship heart break. Honestly soul shattering. She was my best friend since we we're kids. Our moms we're literally pregnant at the same time with us. I was basically going through a hard time in my relationship at the time and I confided in her. I'd basically cry to her. And when me and the guy broke up. I was so heart broken and sad. She knew this. And still went behind my back and got with him. And they're basically in a relationship now. At first I was in denial. I wanted it to not be true so I was still friends with her. Hoping she would come to her senses. And we did eventually have the conversation. She chose him over me. And I was so sad. This made me think about the friendship. And they we're so many red flags about her but she's all I knew since I was a kid. But I understand now that not everyone is meant to be in my life forever. And she run her course and I needed to let go. The constant betrayal. I had to cut her off.
Wow hope you are or have healed from this. This is so wrong!
@@lf3554 it recently happened :( it will definitely take some time. But I'm okay 🤍 thank you.
@@luhenmel That It will stay strong 💪
She was never your friend … sounds like she’s been plotting this whole time
I’m so sorry that happened to you, when girls go behind your back and take your man (I mean leftovers) it’s usually because they are competing with you and/or want to be with you.
You dodged two bullets tbh!
Thanks for your contribution ❤
She could be a supermodel. Her facial structure, skin tone and height. Lawd have mercy, my heart 😍
"She" looks like transgender or really is
@nice being the name really don’t suit your behavior. She is a natural born beautiful woman. If she’s not your cup of tea then go find coffee and leave the lady alone 🙄
@@MaryEssence Get educated
i think female friends can be so polite and fake friendly.. and make you constantly question, did she even want me to text her/ call her/ be there? why do i NEVER feel like she makes an effort? .. oh well.. i just let it go.. but then .. my dad died. and she NEVER said anything. so i confronted her.... like a long heartfelt message about it, and *she never replied* !! so in a way i was thinking THANK YOU - i always suspected this, but now i KNOW front and center - you were never my friend. now i know.
I’m so sorry you had to go through something like this!! On the bright side like you said, you know now she was never your friend and you don’t have to waste anymore time on her! The people you keep close to you are an important factor in your life and the way your life goes to treat it like it’s important!
Maybe she had you blocked? Did you try other avenues? Not trying to offend you but you should consider that and reach out to your friend…IF God is calling you to.
@@mahoganidiamond you sound like an absolute joy to be around....
@@Yeodoongiiie I’ll take that as a compliment. Thank you!
@@mahoganidiamond you should learn to read a room. A friend not being there for you in the worst times, and then you blame the one in pain? I should do more….? … I don’t know what your purpose of writing your comment was, but very much not appreciated.
Good topic. I do have red flags in friendships but I think it may be an unpopular opinion, I’ll share anyways 😂 1) trauma bonding/ trauma dumping in the beginning or want to create a friendship with me.
2) not letting things go after venting
3) spiteful thinking
4) too involved in celebrities / influencers life/drama
5) non stop boy talk
6) doing the most for validation or attention.
Yes, “the tea” and useless talk about men is frivolous
I hate number 1,2,3,5 the most ugh
Not unpopular at all. I’d agree with all of this
Number 4 is legit my pet peeve lol
I cant stand those women neither.
I recently tried being friends with a coworker, despite knowing the common knowledge never to befriend one, but I thought I’d go against the odds. However, I was humbled so quick. I confided in her that I was thinking of quitting and she went behind my back to our manager pretty much asking to take my place and she was telling me she was going to start training soon. I shut that down so quick and refused to do it as I knew her true intentions. I’m keeping it professional now, but it goes to show you cannot be friends with your coworkers and be careful about what you vent to with them. It’s so hard finding true friends, but I’m accepting being alone is way better than being friends with the wrong people, or someone who is trying to ruin your career in this case.
With men there's always an underlying threat of violence. Respect is paramount in male friendships. That's how I became best friends with my bully at school. Only because one day I decided to fight back. A true friend is not someone who just likes you, it's someone who respects you at the core
Underlying threat made me laugh out loud I don’t why but I hear that, thank you for you for your contribution ❤
Beautiful truth here ❤
I remember watching one famous russian psychologist and she was talking about male and female friendships as well. So basically men are always trying to avoid some "deep" topics, they tend to think more about the concequences of their actions whereas women tend to be more emotional and open
After watching her and your videos i started doubting the "unbreakable bond" between men, the society tells us that women can't be friends with each other and that men are better at maintaining friendships, but the society doesn't tell us that the cost of many long male friendships are the lack of depth
I just had a betrayal from someone I called a friend, I think im just happy I dont get to enter another season with such negative energy, In the end, she weaponized everything I told her in confidence and attempted to turn people against me. I started appreciating my true friends more and pouring more of my energy into the people who are truly rooting for me.
A cousin just did this too me.
When you get a gut instinct about someone don’t ignore it I learnt the hard way 😢 when you know the relationship is expiring allow it too as resentment and hatred grows towards the person which is just as toxic
One-sided friendships are real and so draining. Free loaders are not your friends! Had to learn that the hard way. You live you learn.
Had a friend live with me twice and each time she came up with excuses to not pay bills, used all my things and constantly borrowed my car…. Even moved her man in to live off of me but got angry everytime i asked for bill money or asked what her plan was for paying bills or moving out
Love bombing into relationships is so good. This happened to me last year and discernment is now my biggest prayer. If it happened to me when I was younger I’d probably be very broken . I was desperate to connect in a new state and ended up hurt!
This was relatable. It's hard to have female friendships the older you get. Some women do begin to view you as competition and become jealous. It can feel weird to call it like that because if you are "normal" you don't go around thinking everyone is jealous of you. It's sad. I do envy men for being able to have drama free friendships and just vibe.
Love this. It’s nice to think that everyone who is in our circle has our back, but the older I’ve gotten the more discerning I’ve become. Many people say they have your best interest at heart but only if you don’t succeed more than them or threaten them in some way.
Beautifully said!!! Discernment is so key. Expectation is only high for my best friend of 18 years
@@modernwomanTv Exactly. I have a couple friends who I would drop anything to help them, and I know they'd do the same. One of them is someone who I've been best friends with for twelve ears, and it's because we always care about each other.
Hey Breeny,
I can relate. I really love females and I value feminine intimacy and connection but from what I've been through I've always had best friends that have really drained me. They either have some mental health issues that cause them to make bad decisions, or insecurity issues that bring down the vibration of the friendship.
I've honestly had my share of bad friends and I'm 22 now, with a lot of female 'friends' but no best friend that I feel I can call when things are tough. I feel that I am always there for people, and a million and one girls can call me when things are down and out but I don't exactly feel that is reciprocated which is fine. People can only help as much as they can give so it doesn't hurt me but it does make me go into this hostile distant energy. I don't wanna bring on more friendships because of the traumatising ones I have had.
I long for a feminine connection. May not have it now but I pray that God brings that girly/sissy into my life.
I feel you girl! I’ve dealt with the same. I still have hope & I still remain open because I know the right ones will stay & the ones that don’t won’t. Just gotta stay open & i just don’t have any expectations anymore whether I think they are really my friend or they are not. I let time tell with their actions.
Please seek an older woman asap and make her the one you go to for advise. They will typically look out for you better than your peers can. I was exactly in your shoes at that age and I’m just sharing what I wish I did. It’s draining being the go-to person for everyone. I suffered for it.
Sending you discernment and wisdom. And please while you may feel good about being able to help others, understand that by saying “it’s okay, others won’t be there”, you are neglecting your needs gradually and this usually strengthens our need to be there for other people more. Also, make sure no one is trauma dumping on you, let them seek therapy. And if someone confides in you with something that’s too heavy, share it with that older woman in your life or mum so that you don’t take on their burden.
I'm standing in prayer for a best friend. Pray, God hears. Guard don't gate your heart. Loved your comment!!!
Just because you know them for a long time that doesn’t mean that they are good friends! Let it go and find peace within yourself!
And sometimes your so called friends ain’t really happy for you and secretly jealous of you! I’m the kinda of friend that imma cheer for you and rooting for you! Sometimes it’s good to be alone less drama!
This is a Holy Spirit moment ..like, this is confirmation!! Thank you for being obedient. God has really been dealing with me about certain "friends", that where I'm going I can't take a lot of these people with me. I jokingly told my sister today that I'm about to change my number because there are too many people who think I'm their friend, but they are not even FRIENDS to me. The Bible tells us you will know them but their FRUIT. What are the people around you PRODUCING? I hear Lord, I hear!
Love this comment!
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
❤❤❤
My mom’s always been telling me “your parents are your only real friends in your life”. She was right all along.
Not mine lol
Not for all of us x
Facts
My mom is my #1 hater, so idk about that lol
Parents are parents, not friends
My problem with making friends now after I graduated 3 years ago , Is that the friendship starts light and fun for a week or something , then the "deep talk" starts and the vents etc... And ofc i understand I complain and vent sometimes too but then it becomes the main subject every time we meet and I just want us to have fun too you know , to laugh and have silly moments , have balance .
Most women are emotional and are looking for someone they can vent to and talk about their problems and that can empathize with them. Men are not as open as women that why their friendships are better. But not because women are bad people we have more feelings and we need be comforted and loved.
@@venusj2594 nah that’s unnecessary trauma dump. If you feel that way go get a therapist! also therapists say that when a person trauma dumps on you, they associate you with their trauma and looses any respect for you. They forget about you when good things happen to them , then remember you when they’re in a rut and have to talk about their problems. I’ve just realized that a lot of women if not most of them are narcissistic and women are way more narcissists than men!
@@venusj2594 males don't necessarily have better friendships. It's because their friendships are surface level and they never show emotional vulnerability which is why mens suicide rates are extremely high.
Girl I don't know whether to cry, scream or throw my phone. You are telling my whole life with your words. This is owed a whole reaction video. Just know I love your spirit girl♡
You are so welcome ❤
This comment definitely resonates with me
The way you just described my entire life… you’re the bridge, the peace, the wisdom that everyone is attracted to, that everyone flocks to. You pour & you pour into them but they never have the capacity or strength to do the same.
I’m grateful for a partner that pours into me and sees me in a way no one else ever has. I don’t have to be the “tough bridge that carries/supports everyone” when I’m with him. I’m safe to be completely me & vulnerable with him.
Cherish the ones that love you for you without any hidden agenda
@@softpinkpeach trust that it is possible because you’re worthy of that too. You’re worthy of being loved unconditionally & poured into unconditionally. Not only in the romantic aspect but friendships too
That’s beautiful!
Thanks for your contribution ❤
Love this piece! Reminds me of what happened to Samira on Love Island. I can so relate!
It’s been revealed who are real and who are not, I had a spring cleanse a month ago and I had cut off the “friends” that didn’t provide security in the friendship.
I was discussing this very thing with my therapist a couple of days ago because I realised and have accepted that someone I thought was a good friend had never been a friend to me at all.
I was actually pretty shocked that I could have been love bombed by someone I thought was a good friend…. That love bombing can also occur in friendships, especially since it’s only happened in my romantic relationships.
If someone declares that you’re best friends within a week of meeting you; then that’s a huge red flag.
I guess this is a nice confirmation that I’m not crazy after all and that it’s not all my fault that I fell for that other person’s intensity and charm.
Had to learn this lesson the hard way. No real friends put you down just to feel better about themselves.
Just because you have similar interests doesn’t mean they are your friend. I was friends w a girl for 15 years and finally realized she was never my friend… she always put me in dangerous or messed up situations, blew me off for men and never really present as a friend in general.
Omg Breeny thank you for sharing your story. I’ve had similar experiences with “friends”. I’ve learned that friendships should be reciprocal. No one should be giving all of the effort. I stopped putting ppl in the friend position who showed me that they’re just an acquaintance or associate. 💯
“My friends call me a lot and I just don’t answer the phone” …why was this me? 😅 ..now they barely call. They finally understand I’m just someone that likes & needs space 😌
I'm glad this came on my feed, I am at the Jaded stage of friendships right now because I truly don't know how to scout friends anymore. I always check up on people, I've walked on egg shells to keep people happy, I try to be understanding of people being busy and having lives, and I will literally change my entire schedule to see people and they wouldn't even do that for me. And I'm just tired of not having a real friend, I finally had to acknowledge to myself that I am generally lonely, so I have been taking this time to just work on myself and learn how to be a friend to myself first and then be a friend to someone else when that time comes. I don't have friends right now and that's okay with me right now. This video helped me alot on what I need to know on how to be in a friendship.
I feel the same way.
Same!
You gotta set boundaries. Stop being there all the time. Especially when it's hard for you to be. Learn that NO is okay. It heals you. I'm learning that myself.
Everything you said here is my experience as well - always reaching out and checking on ppl, always trying to plan things and meet up with ppl. But no one ever calls me, checks on me, tries to make plans to see me. And I just completely washed my hands of it all.
@@sheliseherry Sometimes it feels you just have to do that. I now have 2 actual friends since making this comment and I no longer feel so Jaded. But still trying to work on it with others lol
“Unfortunately sometimes the ones we have to watch out for aren’t the ones who boldly stand against us but those that stand beside us. Ruined friendships stings! But should remind ourselves to not use that as a reason to never trust again that’s exactly what the enemy wants. To be islands and to ourselves. Instead love harder and realize that the hurt experience is coz you actually cared. That’s strength - don’t be an island but remain vigilant. “ this whole paragraph got me through one of my painful broken friendship last year. We pick our friends but life situations has a way of sorting the categories out for sure! Big believer in solid friendships and community - absolute life changer
There was one friend I had through my late teens to early twenties. It took me such a long time to realise she was toxic. It has scarred me because with all friendships I have now I question whether my friends actually want to see my downfall which is how that other friend used to behave. She would literally be happy if things were not going well for me. She was also the source of all the drama I had in my life. Be careful out there ladies.
This video was just what I needed to confirm not feeling guilty for walking away from a friend I've had these sentiments & signs about. Discernment and boundaries are sooo important! A huge red flag is someone thinking that everyone is jealous of them, something is definitely off upstairs.
Glad you spoke on this subject
False friends can ruin you life
True friends like you are a blessing
You are smart and very beautiful
Dressed in black and gold today
Wearing both without intimates
Those are needless for you to wear
And you are going barefoot as well
In Arabic, there are 12 words to describe the different levels or stages of friendship. The 12th level is the type of friend who is so in tune with you, so connected, that you can basically read each other's minds. I've never had a friend like that. I wish I did.
I totally understand what you meant when you interjected at 18:50. I admire your ability to take accountability for why you might not feel that close and connected to your friends as you'd like. But I understand what you meant. A best friend will feel natural. It's okay if not everyone is that for you, even if they are a good friend otherwise.
Breeny I swear you get prettier and prettier each video!! I love your channel so much!! I’m a young women myself (20) and ur videos help me out so much!! thank you thank you for your time , content , & your overall channel!! It’s very comforting for me!
Most Female friendships fail eventually because the foundations of those relationships are based on mental intimacy AKA talk, gossip entertainment and a listening ear that will validate my existence.. unfortunately drama and toxic nonsense is the prime stimulant but once your life presents less bs and hype (maturity) or you stop chatting all your business you'll find the women fizzle out of your circle because you ain't feeding their ego and even worse if possible they will create drama with you to keep the wheels turning... And thats the normal standard friendship dynamics..now throw a man in the mix that's a decent looker/ catch and it gets 10 times worse because those friends also enter competition with you subconsciously..for women to maintain most friendships you have to play the role of a fan, suck up and enabler to bs..
Agreed
I agree
Sir, why are you interjecting yourself in womens issues as if you're an expert on said issues??. How very male of you ...
@@Dely-dr8xu thanks 🫶🏿 but no need to respond to such people lol..its just attention seeking they can't challenge my comments because it's beyond there intelligence, they cant attack my looks as I'm handsome, they don't know my profession etc so they'll try reach for shaming 😂.. like I'm less of a man for commenting on a RUclips topic about females but commenting on the wildlife channels about lions doesn't make me more like a lion 🥺🤷🏿♂️
@@abottleofRUMtv he spoke facts what’s ur problem?
You are extremely beautiful & with that it’s very hard to have people that want to be your friend just because you need a friend. Women can be very competitive and will sometimes pry or relish in information that makes you seem flawed. I’ve found it very hard to trust people that want to be so close so I find that I keep relationships surface level to avoid people feeling satisfied instead of supportive when you’re going through rough patches or experiencing hard times. Never dim your light even if you have to be alone!
I really got struck by that statement of meeting people on the same level as me, Mentally! That's a game changer!
Like that statement would actually make a whole topic & conversation 🙌
Girl I can relate! All of my friends went down the drain between the end of 2019 and 2020. I'm talking about friendships that were 5-10 yrs old. I had to start from scratch and when I attempted to make new friends that bit me so bad in the butt because my guard was down and I was open/vulnerable. Now I just have some really close associates and acquaintances. I would like more closer connections but my problem I don't really feel like telling people what I need. I'm looking for a person or people who have organic traits. I'm kind of a low maintenance friend too, I don't need constant contact or adoration. But my love language is words of affirmation and acts of service which I would prefer it translates as geniune support and reciprocity. Something I've only recieved in spurts that were attached with an alterrior motive. 😫
You are GLOWING GIRL !
You don’t know how much I needed this right now❤ thank you🥺
i love how active you have been!! good job girl! i’ve needed this conversation in my life right now.
that's why I say I have 1-2 friends at most. bc all of the others are just acquaintances. So many "friends" judge, gossip and hate these days that its not a flex to say "I have friends" but instead have good healthy friendships even if its 1-2 ppl max.
Omg I relate with you so much in being a bad friend rn. Past people and life just created this guard and being alone feels the best in this season.
This topic is so real and right on time! Enormously relatable as well. 🖤🖤
woaw still adapting to that new image she is so much better like that. damn. beautiful
This is so relatable! Thank you for sharing your heart ♥️
I feel the same, especially with the attachment style dynamics - here’s to learning and empowering ourselves in this knowledge, towards being (more) wise 🤗
Videos like this affirm the reason why my friendship circle is small. You look amazing Breeny ❤️
This is so true. I was in this position(and still sometimes fall into it because it’s our autopilot nature to give more)
But honestly speaking the whole ‘energetic boundary’ game completely turned it around for me.
I can almost 100 percent relate to you. Thank you for sharing this. It is always awkward and uncomfortable when I'm asked for an emergency contact. I haven't had one in several years. I have been through some very tough times in life so I had to and managed to build a life to where I don't need anyone close to me to be an emergency contact and I will be fine regardless, but it does feel uncomfortable, also realizing you don't have a best friend. I was just thinking that dating friends the way you date men is an important way to vet friends.
Your transparency and authenticity are helping more people than you know .❤
I’m so glad that I can relate to this because even tho I have a sister friend from 10 years ago. I did had a fake friend experience a couple of months ago and it was honestly like going through a break up when I found out everything that she was saying behind my back and how drastically “changed” without me doing absolutely anything to her. And now I’m kind of in guard now. Thank you @breenylee ❤️ I was depressed because of that for months but now I’m over it. Still I appreciate you and this is one of my favorite RUclips channels, love you. From Puerto Rico🇵🇷🙏🏼🥺
The most powerful form of courage is vulnerability ❤
Breeny I can totally relate. And sometimes it makes me feel a little crazy, but hearing this from you has provided perspective and comfort. Thank you so much for sharing 💕
So breathtaking . 3 strikes and you’re out 📝 Thank you for this Breeny❤
Thank you for always sharing meaningful, helpful and very real content, so eloquently and with so much grace. Always straight to the point. ❤❤❤❤
I’ve been watching u for a couple years now and you have helped me a lot with my relationships with myself and others as well as my self confidence. It’s like listening to a big sister 💕💕
Thanks for this perspective, I’m definitely working on these talking points to better my existence.
i love the (risky) honesty about the closeness you have for your current friends. it’s the type of stuff that needs to said out loud but no one wants to acknowledge or talk about it
This is so true and was sooo good. Relationships with women can be very tricky but I love all of the points you made.
thank you Breeny for this video. i parted ways with my best friend of 6 years and i realised that as much as i was trying to pour into the friendship, i was not a good friend overall. i’m learning as i’m going through these experiences.
GIIIIRRRRRRRLLLLLLLLL YOU PREACHIN A WHOLE WORD! So many people always tell me how much they "love" me but their actions never show it. People love having access to me without the responsibility of being accountable to me for their actions because i can provide 100% transparency, but thats too much for a lot of fakes.
Love this! I agree there's a difference between friends and acquaintances, I'm not quick to make friends because you just never know with people since it can be hard to tell who is genuine. We really gotta take our time to vet and get to know people before we can call them a friend
It's a good time for the message in this video with the Shanquella Robinson case having happened recently. I respect it Breeny 💜
It’s so fucking crazy this video came up. I was legit JUST talking about how I feel I’ve outgrown my friends. You put what I was feeling into words so beautifully. Thank you so much ❤
Strangers are Your Biggest Supporters Brenny! Keep it that Way! That Top Gets Lonelt but it’s Peaceful Trust Me! Not having the biggest expectations in others but getting different needs from different ppl is the best and Healthiest
Hey Breeny, Cancer here as well. I resonated with this video so much. Currently in this phase on my journey of taking a step back and reflecting. Thank you for the insight and perspective! Much appreciated❤🤞🏽
Wow Breeny this video is so timely! I am actually amazed and shocked.. you are a God sent to me right now. Thank you
Woooo glad you touching on this topic. I had to let go of so called gossiping friend off. This whole topic became an epiphany to me last year during my Self discovery journey. I am also learning to pace myself not to falI in love with PERSONALITY but CHARACTER with time. This video needs to be on repeat! The world has changed. They don't make them like they used to.
Hi Breeny i really felt seen in this video, thank you for releasing this gem. I would love if you talked in another video about how you literally make friends using examples of texts you'd send or what you literally say.
Breeny you are looking so stunning and the glitter outfit was made for you. You look like a supermodel. Thanks for sharing these wisdom !
This was SO GOOD!!! So much wisdom and practical knowledge here...keep it up, young lady!
💯 I can totally relate …
Definitely about mindset, also we do have to recognise who we are and not seek to make friends with people who aren’t on the same wavelength.
You’re absolutely gorgeous! This video resonates with me so much. Im learning boundaries and realize how many jealous women I’ve had in my life. It’s been painful yet, I’m thankful to now know what it was.
Thank you so much for discussing this topic! This year has definitely shown me not everyone is my friend, even while they’re love hinging you, I’m currently in a roommate situation with a girl I used to consider a good and close friend to me and out of no where she’s switched up and has been using every chance she gets to try to torment me. As women we really do have to be more careful and vet female friends as heavily as we do with men.
You hit it on the head with this one breeny
This was very educational. Thank you so much
Thank you Breeny Lee you are the realest ever, I only realized this in 2020, it felt so good cutting ✂️ all my fake friends out of my life. I realized the people I called friends, don't even like me. They were never there for me when I needed them, they judged me all the time and they competed with me.‼️🎯‼️
This video came right on time. You really put things into perspective when you spoke on placing certain people into certain categories. I truly desire an abundance of love and support and simply don’t have it. I’m the strong friend and I’ve been feeling like no one pours into me the way I pour into them. It has left me depressed and depleted. I will be 27 in a few months and I find it hard to make new friends at this age but I’m yearning for sisterhood, it’s so important to me; I’m definitely looking forward to your video on how to make friends!
the set is giving.
Breeny this is a good content. I went through a similar experience and I actually like the fact that I am not on the phone with my friends.
Helps me to read and focus on building in silence.
By the way, can you link details on the hair if you don’t mind. Looks amazing.
Such a good chat,thanks for the insight and knowledge 🫶🏾✨went through a friendship breakup last year summer but I still reminisce about the good times while knowing I could never open that door again because it was becoming unhealthy and draining. Don’t be afraid to walk away if the bad out-ways the good,choose your peace ladies at all times❤
Breenyyyyy, you are gorgeoussssssss as heckkk girl!! Fine like wine....
You spoke pure facts and I experienced the exact same things. The exact same things. I'm born under the Cancer sign too girl and yes at givingggg! We're always there for others sincerely but geeezzz this world is crazy sometimes. I found myself really jaded because literally allllll my "friends" did me really dirty to the point where I started to question myself. Turns out some of them were just seasons of shifting and have managed to reconnect with my best friend in a much more mature way. The others I couldn't care less about lol. One girl used her words to try and curse me because I didn't give her money while she was pregnant and her baby daddy was just around doing the most and the least at taking care of her lol.
You are absolutely right about the crazy ones walking around saying that everyone is jealous of them. One of them who always copied me, was intensely jealous and envious of me (I only accepted it about 4 years ago) treated me soooooo badly because I received a compliment from a stranger on her birthday celebrations. She copies EVERYTHINGGGGGGGGG even my words I'd use as captions etc lol. One time I posted a caption in 2018, by 2020 she literally copied my exact words and changed two words (now I'm convinced that she has a dossier of my pics and everything hahahaha). She also loves bomb the heckkkk out of me when she's in a good mood; the girl is crazyyyyyy. Last time we hung out was last year and she just stopped speaking to me lol. Still copies everything I do on social media as if no one will notice it but oh well. I genuinely think she is a narc so no loss on my end at all; I've got my core of women who I pray for and about and still hold space for forgiveness when anything comes up.
Yes I really enjoyed this talk. This is so true how females will act one way and then switch up when they are with other people or secretly hide their hate. It is so sad but I’m glad you have now gotten a good set of people around you, who understand your needs and boundaries!
Breeny!!!! I love how authentic you are! You're so open and honest! I love your content! You have been an inspiration in my life! May the Lord bless you one hundred fold 🙏❤️
Oh Breeny, I would love to be your friend, I genuinely feel like we would get along very well. You give so much wisdom and your heart and soul is so beautiful you're like an older sister to me 💓💓 thank you for being you and always being real 💓
Breenie this video was soo on point 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👌🏾 I'm a Cancer like you and a giver. I have experienced all the BS and defo good to check your friends every now and then. I'm at that point in life where I have a small circle and know who my forever friends are but also really enjoy Me time.
Thanks for this vid...was good to hear these things being discussed. 💖
Thank you for sharing your story. Listening to this video you remind me of myself Breeny. And what I've learned is that I do the most lol in every aspect of my life, my relationships, my passions etc. Regarding relationships, people have to earn that. Now I slowly let people in, slowly let people reap the benefits of me. Slowing down allows me to see the subtleties because even within your story I can hear the subtle signs this girl did not value your friendship, may not have even liked you or the things you offered. We have to have some accountability too in who we choose to let in. Just like men earning privileges when dating, friendships have to too. In adulthood, it is not enough to simply share interests or similar life experiences. They have to value what you bring to the friendship and you have to have standards for what you want out of it. Sis sounded neglectful af. Praying for inspiring, adoring, uplifting and giving friendships and romantic relationships for all of us 🙏🏾 we are deserving
Love you Breeny!!
I wish this video came out three years ago when I was literally HOLDING ON FOR DEAR LIFE onto a friendship with a friend who didn’t want anything to do with me. Cutting off that friendship and moving solo for a while really helped me heal that need of wanting to have a best friend. It was like I always needed a best friend and didn’t know who I was without one. when I was truly alone, I realized so much about myself. Thankfully now, I have one friend, who I’ve been friends with for nearly ten years and has always been consistent. And I’m happy with it like that.
Yesss!!! I literally lost all of my friends this year.. it hurt but it's for the best. Pls make a video on how to make more friends. I've been struggling for the past few years to make those core friends. Thank you ❤️