Interesting that you mentioned socioeconomics. I would challenge you to think about the fact that families of higher status (positions, money, power) are much better able to get away with, hide, and cover up their crimes and the crimes and bad behaviors of their growing children.
Don't get what's up with the cognitive vs affective empathy. (Or are there even more?) I'm on the autistic spectrum, childhood trauma, alcoholic family, stuff like that. Now-ex seems to be a covert narcissist, also trauma, drug abuse in the family, etc. So we both seem to lack affective empathy, both have reasons or excuses, doesn't matter. _But:_ narcissists are assumed to not care due to that shortcoming, and partly I agree. On the other hand from my experience: I don't feel much empathy, either, but I do care about other people's well being. Yes, I'm sometimes rude because of that, usually because I just don't get what's the fuss about. But I do know that people feel a certain way and want them to feel good, I want them to experience fairness, etc. In general I'm trying to be a good person and have positive impact on others and the world in general, although I know it'll most probably be minute. So the point is: is affective empathy necessary in order to really be a good person? Am I on the brink of turning to the dark side due to my impediment? I've been told, that it's normal to see something happen to a person and really feel it, like all the time. Found that astounding. Yet currently sounds much like a loss of control to me, but that may be Aspie thinking. But isn't the necessity to feel other people's pain in order to try to avoid it just egotistical in the end? Like "I want to feel good, seeing you suffer makes me feel bad, so I try to make you feel good, too"? Slightly off topic: I'm also an atheist, and especially monotheistic people often tell me, that nothing would stop me from crimes but the fear of hell/faith in God/..., maybe besides harsh worldly punishments. No?! What about trying to be good for no particular reason? Sounds like a similar argument to me. I'm confused. Especially as I find the religious argument ridiculous, but the empathy thing I hear from psychologists, too, whom I consider people of clarity, knowledge and science. Argh!
You both may in fact have cognitive empathy,ftom watching others or realizing others respond to certain situations differently than you do,meaning they express emotions positive or negative, a narcissist will practice from a young age,to read this is others and mimic it.True empathy is the abi!it to put yourself in the others shoes,its to be other focused, and intuit what they must feel,hold Ing space to validate their experience.
If one is in search for a medical diagnosis I must ask why???? Isn't the best thing in one's best interest to walk away from any of these personality disorders? They are and can continue to abuse others and actually achieve damaging them for life
Its good to have the knowledge and understanding of what a person may be dealing with in order to know how and when to get out. Also to know how to avoid these people. Yes staying away is best.
Interesting that you mentioned socioeconomics. I would challenge you to think about the fact that families of higher status (positions, money, power) are much better able to get away with, hide, and cover up their crimes and the crimes and bad behaviors of their growing children.
It's really difficult to tell the difference seeing how simular they are.
I feel like it's possible for someone to suffer from both.
Definitely. I also listen to Dr Les Carter. He said all Sociopaths are narcissists, but not all narcissists are sociopaths. Makes sense.
My Ex-husband had BOTH
Wow. Have been trying to find the difference between the two and didn't know until now. Very brilliant man.
Thank you for the explanation.
Don't get what's up with the cognitive vs affective empathy. (Or are there even more?)
I'm on the autistic spectrum, childhood trauma, alcoholic family, stuff like that. Now-ex seems to be a covert narcissist, also trauma, drug abuse in the family, etc.
So we both seem to lack affective empathy, both have reasons or excuses, doesn't matter.
_But:_ narcissists are assumed to not care due to that shortcoming, and partly I agree. On the other hand from my experience: I don't feel much empathy, either, but I do care about other people's well being. Yes, I'm sometimes rude because of that, usually because I just don't get what's the fuss about. But I do know that people feel a certain way and want them to feel good, I want them to experience fairness, etc. In general I'm trying to be a good person and have positive impact on others and the world in general, although I know it'll most probably be minute.
So the point is: is affective empathy necessary in order to really be a good person? Am I on the brink of turning to the dark side due to my impediment?
I've been told, that it's normal to see something happen to a person and really feel it, like all the time. Found that astounding. Yet currently sounds much like a loss of control to me, but that may be Aspie thinking. But isn't the necessity to feel other people's pain in order to try to avoid it just egotistical in the end? Like "I want to feel good, seeing you suffer makes me feel bad, so I try to make you feel good, too"?
Slightly off topic: I'm also an atheist, and especially monotheistic people often tell me, that nothing would stop me from crimes but the fear of hell/faith in God/..., maybe besides harsh worldly punishments. No?! What about trying to be good for no particular reason? Sounds like a similar argument to me. I'm confused. Especially as I find the religious argument ridiculous, but the empathy thing I hear from psychologists, too, whom I consider people of clarity, knowledge and science. Argh!
You both may in fact have cognitive empathy,ftom watching others or realizing others respond to certain situations differently than you do,meaning they express emotions positive or negative, a narcissist will practice from a young age,to read this is others and mimic it.True empathy is the abi!it to put yourself in the others shoes,its to be other focused, and intuit what they must feel,hold
Ing space to validate their experience.
Thank you so much! This helped to bring a much better understanding. Can this be connected to a DNA 🧬 trait?
It can.
If one is in search for a medical diagnosis I must ask why???? Isn't the best thing in one's best interest to walk away from any of these personality disorders? They are and can continue to abuse others and actually achieve damaging them for life
Its good to have the knowledge and understanding of what a person may be dealing with in order to know how and when to get out. Also to know how to avoid these people. Yes staying away is best.