Can Reddit write a smooth pickup line one word at a time

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  • Опубликовано: 21 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 8 тыс.

  • @Lord__Voldemort
    @Lord__Voldemort Год назад +12607

    Please don’t suck my nose

  • @shapooopiefour7173
    @shapooopiefour7173 Год назад +6828

    One Redditor may not be able to get a girlfriend, but with the power of teamwork, *many* Redditors may not be able to get a girlfriend.

    • @doughboywhine
      @doughboywhine Год назад +170

      Like crabs in a bucket

    • @kyokazuto
      @kyokazuto Год назад +245

      Can they get a boyfriend tho

    • @Davian2073
      @Davian2073 Год назад +117

      ​@@kyokazutoThat sounds... Kinda gay ngl

    • @klsad
      @klsad Год назад

      ​​@@Davian2073science says that it is 100% straight to fuck guys

    • @dampseeker
      @dampseeker Год назад +78

      ape together still not strong

  • @ThatOneSeal
    @ThatOneSeal Год назад +3870

    "I’m horny, so watch out" is the one sentence for the whole internet

  • @straybricks
    @straybricks 11 месяцев назад +1037

    “Comment removed by moderator” is such an underrated inclusion.

    • @Hi-dx1xk
      @Hi-dx1xk 9 месяцев назад +65

      What in the world could that one word have been?? 😂

    • @LarryTheTugaGamer1511
      @LarryTheTugaGamer1511 8 месяцев назад +51

      ​@@Hi-dx1xkSome things are best to remain unknown..

    • @lolliii5477
      @lolliii5477 8 месяцев назад +24

      no beings shall know what horrors lie beneath such statement...

    • @darthvaderbutwayshittier7054
      @darthvaderbutwayshittier7054 7 месяцев назад +16

      It makes the joke funnier.

    • @T-Gwen-T
      @T-Gwen-T 5 месяцев назад +3

      There’s only one word that’s more horrific than a swear word. That if I even said it here I would get banned.

  • @___________________________-.-
    @___________________________-.- 10 месяцев назад +699

    The guy who placed a comma after "kids" is a true hero

    • @lolliii5477
      @lolliii5477 8 месяцев назад +65

      KIDS, comma, NOW

    • @chaoschaoschaoss
      @chaoschaoschaoss 5 месяцев назад +10

      that couldve, ahem, gone uh very wrong

    • @BlakeH..888_
      @BlakeH..888_ 5 месяцев назад +3

      Wait, what?

    • @chaoschaoschaoss
      @chaoschaoschaoss 5 месяцев назад +20

      @@BlakeH..888_ the sentence couldve turned into, uh, any number of sexual prompts involving children-

    • @akahelpwttubers
      @akahelpwttubers 9 дней назад

      ✋🏻sex😏 🗡️NOW😠

  • @FoxtrotYouniform
    @FoxtrotYouniform Год назад +3512

    I used the 'a penis is just a cabbage' line on my wife while she as playing nintendo and now she's playing nintendo AND listening to an audiobook so she, quote, 'wont have to deal with (my) bullshit.'
    Thanks reddit!

    • @EternalShadow1667
      @EternalShadow1667 Год назад +338

      Reddit: helping couples raise their productivity by 200%

    • @BeastBeatsYoMom
      @BeastBeatsYoMom Год назад +230

      Just wait until she starts eating cabbage, then say it again

    • @dizzy_jump
      @dizzy_jump Год назад +31

      you got it wrong

    • @Orangekid65
      @Orangekid65 Год назад

      ​@@dizzy_jumpyeah, it should be "cabbage is just penis in disguise."

    • @TheRealBatabii
      @TheRealBatabii Год назад +29

      Your wife plays nintendo? Damn, you got lucky

  • @mikethegoo
    @mikethegoo Год назад +1908

    "Tonight, you will wank" sounds more like an answer to the pickup line than a pickup line itself

    • @Gary-Eng
      @Gary-Eng Год назад +102

      it sounds like the beginning of a movie trailer

    • @ERROR_V1X-N
      @ERROR_V1X-N Год назад +2

      “The doctor said you’d never wank again… It’s a miracle!”

    • @AngelBirdo
      @AngelBirdo Год назад +83

      @@Gary-Eng A horror movie trailer, the quote very much feels like a threat

    • @erihtea0719
      @erihtea0719 Год назад +61

      It sounds like a command

    • @saccorhytus
      @saccorhytus Год назад

      @@AngelBirdoget ready for the wank of your life

  • @rsnnramlall9642
    @rsnnramlall9642 Год назад +2324

    i love that part where reddit decides to sing sweet caroline cause it actually may work as a pickup line

    • @icecranberry2148
      @icecranberry2148 Год назад +107

      Well, her name has to be actually Caroline but yeah.

    • @LordAJ12345
      @LordAJ12345 Год назад +75

      @@icecranberry2148 Or you have to be a really good singer

    • @DitzyNizzy2009
      @DitzyNizzy2009 Год назад +57

      @@icecranberry2148- "Who's Caroline? My name's Rachel."

    • @Alfonso162008
      @Alfonso162008 Год назад +58

      @@DitzyNizzy2009 "Whoops, sorry!" *starts singing "Rosanna" by Toto*

    • @smileyface81mc77
      @smileyface81mc77 Год назад +46

      I loved that part, it was genuinely really charming. Like, it was absolutely a “task failed successfully” thing, but I loved it lol. Like, everyone in that thread was like “bollocks to this, let’s sing some Neil Diamond!”

  • @Armadeus
    @Armadeus Год назад +2068

    "are you my mom because you look like my father's wife"
    gets me giggling every time

    • @navnibrijesh7258
      @navnibrijesh7258 10 месяцев назад +125

      Fr it sounds like a lost child finding his mum 😭

    • @adobezy
      @adobezy 9 месяцев назад +32

      3:25 is timestamp if you guys need it

    • @FilipinoNoob69420
      @FilipinoNoob69420 6 месяцев назад +4

      ​@@adobezy w

    • @adobezy
      @adobezy 6 месяцев назад +3

      @@FilipinoNoob69420 thank you and yw

    • @yesy8s52
      @yesy8s52 5 месяцев назад +5

      I read it as "are you my mom because you look like my wife's father"

  • @fish-champ
    @fish-champ Год назад +9819

    Matt Rose is like an internet archeologist, he’s constantly finding posts from a time long ago

  • @0ri0nssuspenders
    @0ri0nssuspenders Год назад +1739

    Just picturing a person yelling "SOMEBODY STOP THE LONELINESS" At a shocked looking person with a drink in their hand over booming club music is sending me 😂

    • @isitsweet9567
      @isitsweet9567 Год назад +58

      It's like something out of a novel.

    • @robinrehlinghaus1944
      @robinrehlinghaus1944 Год назад +30

      That sounds like it has happened already 21 times in 21 clubs and 21 pubs in 21 countries for 21 men

    • @N95j
      @N95j Год назад +15

      @@robinrehlinghaus1944hmmmm, technically wouldn’t that be a bit more than 21 times? just curious

    • @badwulff
      @badwulff Год назад +22

      @@N95j 21 times per club y'see

    • @isitsweet9567
      @isitsweet9567 Год назад +5

      @@badwulff Wouldn't you have to adjust the number of instances per country for population and popularity of club culture in that country?

  • @that_one_paperclip8373
    @that_one_paperclip8373 Год назад +2637

    this is probably one of the few videos that I haven't heard Matt say "skullemoji" and I am genuinely surprised.

    • @beepboopboopbeep3
      @beepboopboopbeep3 Год назад +24

      Huh, true. I didn't think about that...

    • @user-ez8gv
      @user-ez8gv Год назад +76

      Well he has the one piece skull on his shirt💀☠️🏴‍☠️

    • @avivyoukerharel2140
      @avivyoukerharel2140 Год назад +49

      Emojis are kinda a taboo on reddit

    • @73frogs
      @73frogs Год назад +18

      he did use the skull emoji in the description!

    • @anomalousanimates
      @anomalousanimates Год назад +5

      SKULLL EMMOJIIII

  • @imthepigeonguy
    @imthepigeonguy Год назад +468

    I love how they can't form a coherent sentence but as soon as someone starts singing Sweet Caroline everyone's all in

  • @arvt_
    @arvt_ Год назад +2036

    this is the equivalent of re-translating a phrase into rarely used language hundreds of times

    • @aionicthunder
      @aionicthunder Год назад +70

      Eh, not enough instances of "I came".
      Or insisting they are "grounded and high"

    • @isitsweet9567
      @isitsweet9567 Год назад +2

      @@aionicthunder I see you are a man of culture.
      But the truth is, I'm gonna end my father. Him. All.

    • @AXAXAXAYt
      @AXAXAXAYt Год назад +6

      ​@@aionicthunderwhen you ask gays what they did at the party

    • @Ellisepha
      @Ellisepha Год назад

      Especially the "Let's intercourse for many seconds" one.

    • @EpicLaserMage7198
      @EpicLaserMage7198 Год назад +11

      @@aionicthunder a possible Book of Mario fan?

  • @BozKol
    @BozKol Год назад +923

    "You look like a fookin horse" immediately followed by "Let's intercourse for many seconds" had me WHEEZING.

    • @dumaass
      @dumaass Год назад

      I have never heard of a better pickup line than "Let us intercourse for many seconds".

    • @Unidentified952
      @Unidentified952 Год назад +18

      FR LMAO

    • @alansmithee419
      @alansmithee419 Год назад +49

      verbing nouns will never not be funny.

    • @bjorncorvin4568
      @bjorncorvin4568 9 месяцев назад +6

      Henry 8th be like:

    • @De19thKingJulion
      @De19thKingJulion 9 месяцев назад +1

      Sarah Jessica Parker

  • @JustAnEverydayAccount
    @JustAnEverydayAccount Год назад +7685

    No, no they can’t. Out of any group of people ever, Reddit are the worst possible people to be charismatic

    • @zorapianist
      @zorapianist Год назад +235

      Agreed. They're as charismatic as a wall

    • @donpollo3154
      @donpollo3154 Год назад +411

      @@zorapianist even a wall is more inviting to run into than a redditor

    • @SuperHGB
      @SuperHGB Год назад +226

      ​@@zorapianistThat's an insult to walls

    • @EdnaK728
      @EdnaK728 Год назад +29

      Some people have told me that I was wrong to date Comic Book Guy because he looks like he spends an ungodly amount of time on Reddit

    • @yell0w-man
      @yell0w-man Год назад +35

      @@donpollo3154what about a disc mod

  • @zeldagamelover24
    @zeldagamelover24 Год назад +297

    Need more of these "one word at a time" videos, cause this is hilariously amazing

  • @Thereischeeseindeed
    @Thereischeeseindeed Год назад +4049

    Him calling his partner his "other half" is actually so sweet

    • @2cv693
      @2cv693 Год назад +283

      It's an old British saying (at least I've only heard older people say it), I'm pretty sure it's more common in t'North

    • @neblolthecarnerd
      @neblolthecarnerd Год назад

      ​@@2cv693I hear it a decent bit and I'm down south

    • @Avendesora
      @Avendesora Год назад +194

      "better half" is the one I hear a lot in the pacific northwest of the US, personally

    • @cursedbeans5560
      @cursedbeans5560 Год назад +56

      @@2cv693can agree,it is said a lot in the north,even by some of the modern generation

    • @twentywordsorlessYT
      @twentywordsorlessYT Год назад +1

      ​@@2cv693My boyfriend has been referring to me as such for the entirety of our relationship thus far. He's 30.

  • @tireiron3452
    @tireiron3452 Год назад +1353

    It starts off normal, then there's always 1 guy who says some wack shit, and the rest of the redditors try to salvage the line. That's how we get "Girl, you are hotter then sunburns on my Aunt Pam."

    • @rosepinkskyblue
      @rosepinkskyblue Год назад

      Then why does the wack shit get upvoted lol it’s obviously better that way

    • @bonedude666
      @bonedude666 Год назад

      Do
      You
      Want
      To
      Sex?
      My
      Bed?

    • @sleepdeep305
      @sleepdeep305 11 месяцев назад +50

      “Are you my mom cause you look like my fathers wife”

    • @bellhel227
      @bellhel227 10 месяцев назад +6

      I genuinely love that line 😂😂😂

  • @ElClubGatunoCR
    @ElClubGatunoCR Год назад +659

    "Let me get us a table at McDicks" had me wheezing of laughter lmao. It sounds like something you COULD say, but you just royally screw up

  • @8squared007
    @8squared007 11 месяцев назад +187

    “Lemme get us a table at Mcdick’s” is CRIMINALLY underappreciated

    • @Jupiter-T
      @Jupiter-T 8 месяцев назад +3

      Yeah I'm not into men, but for people who are, surely that would work, no??

    • @8squared007
      @8squared007 8 месяцев назад +11

      @@Jupiter-T Nah, it works for straight guys too.
      “Hey girl, lemme get us a table at McDick’s. What’re you orderin’?”

    • @Jupiter-T
      @Jupiter-T 8 месяцев назад

      @@8squared007 Straight men like to be called girls? XD

  • @uranian-Umbra
    @uranian-Umbra Год назад +3903

    “Methamphetamine sure tastes sweeter on tits” is actually a great pickup line

    • @cursedbeans5560
      @cursedbeans5560 Год назад +147

      No

    • @Coercioner
      @Coercioner Год назад

      @@cursedbeans5560yes.

    • @HotdogWaterVibes
      @HotdogWaterVibes Год назад +283

      Im gonna use it on my friend and see how they react lmao

    • @Smoldragoncat
      @Smoldragoncat Год назад +165

      I never expected to hear this from someone with a Ralsei pfp

    • @sholamakinde430
      @sholamakinde430 Год назад +100

      what happened to ralsei
      how did he get on this horrific part of the internet
      why did you stoop down to reddit

  • @KMDT_BLITZ
    @KMDT_BLITZ Год назад +3653

    And like always. Reddit is just the equivalent of a classroom of 8th graders hicked off ecstacy

    • @HashSl1ng1ngSlasher
      @HashSl1ng1ngSlasher Год назад +104

      Tbh this is from the golden period 7 or 8 years ago. The platform has since botted up and devolved noticeably.

    • @shadow_flux2304
      @shadow_flux2304 Год назад +5

      Yup. THATS WHY THAT HAPENED OMFG LAST UEAR WAS AWFUL😭😭😭😭💀

    • @husky0098
      @husky0098 Год назад +26

      @@namantherockstar You seem legit. Though advertising in other people's comment sections isn't cool. That stuff can ruin your public image. I'll make an exception because you do actually make videos, but don't do this again.

    • @BiggiecheeseAKAgod
      @BiggiecheeseAKAgod Год назад +33

      ​@@husky0098 Bro they're a bot they literally spam this on a ton of videos in order to get views and subscribers, they definitely are NOT legit.

    • @wingerwc
      @wingerwc Год назад +2

      Been there done that-

  • @Un_prønøunceable
    @Un_prønøunceable Год назад +611

    This is one of my favorites now actually. I’m over here practically cripplingly sick and cackling my coughing ass off watching Matt’s videos with zero regret in regards to my sore throat

    • @IfImCommentingStopMe
      @IfImCommentingStopMe Год назад +46

      I have to keep rewinding because I miss the next ones from laughing 😂

    • @Matt_Rose
      @Matt_Rose  Год назад +124

      Feel better soon! ☺️

    • @Fun_maths
      @Fun_maths Год назад +3

      same

    • @zetametallic
      @zetametallic Год назад +5

      Get well soon. Being ill is shit. X

    • @arnerademacker
      @arnerademacker Год назад +3

      Literally same, thank you for brightening our sick days, Matt!

  • @starlightbard
    @starlightbard Год назад +254

    "Bonjour, je brûlée amoureux" is probably the most threatening thing here, omg lol
    "Good morning, I burned in love"

    • @Zarmdthecoolest
      @Zarmdthecoolest 5 месяцев назад +8

      Sounds like they set their SO on fire

    • @doo_lissdu_lighost6133
      @doo_lissdu_lighost6133 5 месяцев назад +3

      I fell into a burning ring of fire

    • @vincenttrigg4521
      @vincenttrigg4521 4 месяца назад +11

      Sounds romantic to me, sounds like they are burning due to being in love with them

    • @ElectricalStorm
      @ElectricalStorm 3 месяца назад

      @@doo_lissdu_lighost6133 and it burned burned burned, the flames went higher

  • @IagreewithDmitri
    @IagreewithDmitri Год назад +3015

    I don't want to alarm you Matt, but Bamboo has turned into a cabbage.

    • @nealjroberts4050
      @nealjroberts4050 Год назад +134

      I don't want to alarm you but that wasn't his Bamboo.

    • @olivebrosnan4437
      @olivebrosnan4437 Год назад

      @@nealjroberts4050r/whooosh

    • @rob3rtbigtoegaming431
      @rob3rtbigtoegaming431 Год назад +1

      No, that's not Bamboo, that's a penis. Remember, cabbage is just penis in disguise.

    • @werul
      @werul Год назад +15

      @@namantherockstar how old are you?

    • @thething.s
      @thething.s Год назад +38

      ​@@namantherockstarbeg more

  • @strangecolouredbird
    @strangecolouredbird Год назад +643

    If Matt ever does "Parents getting franchise names wrong", I once showed my Mum a song from DHMIS and she said
    "Is this from Dont trust me I'm naked? The one with the Duck?"
    ☠️

    • @tailpig6417
      @tailpig6417 Год назад +30

      He already did that with movie names, with some other ones thrown in, so this would be a sequel

    • @lalas181
      @lalas181 Год назад +88

      Man, I sure do love hit RUclips series turned somehow just as excellent TV show Don't Trust Me, I'm Naked

    • @mazzy_ivy
      @mazzy_ivy Год назад +20

      SKUH-HUUUULL EMOJAAAY

    • @inkcloudss
      @inkcloudss Год назад +15

      IM SORRY BUT THIS SO FUCKING HILARIOUS WHAT

    • @TheNewOrchestra
      @TheNewOrchestra Год назад +44

      "Don't Trust Me, I'm Naked" sounds like the worst porn parody in the history of porn parodies.

  • @wumfumblus
    @wumfumblus 11 месяцев назад +234

    "How hard is calculus? Not as hard as my.. prostate" is possibly the best pickup line ever

    • @Slimeball21_3
      @Slimeball21_3 6 месяцев назад

      Last guy saved it from being worse lol

    • @macaronandcheese18113
      @macaronandcheese18113 6 месяцев назад

      @@Slimeball21_3 not as hard as my... heart :(

    • @amerain1729
      @amerain1729 3 месяца назад

      Bro has prostate cancer 😭

  • @isabellacrump103
    @isabellacrump103 Год назад +2637

    Off topic but like why does Matt’s wife sound like the nicest lady ever LOL

    • @Matt_Rose
      @Matt_Rose  Год назад +1407

      Ye she's a goodun

    • @koiifsh
      @koiifsh Год назад +328

      she sounds like she makes the best cookies

    • @j_cannot_type
      @j_cannot_type Год назад +91

      SHE IS 😭😭😭💗💗💗

    • @mr_dumbgogles4281
      @mr_dumbgogles4281 Год назад +85

      Yeah I met her personally yerterday night, she is a sweetheart ❤ 😊

    • @j_cannot_type
      @j_cannot_type Год назад +119

      ​@@mr_dumbgogles4281is this sarcastic or not IM GOING INSANE

  • @JackFennec98
    @JackFennec98 Год назад +432

    I was out with a couple of friends not to long ago and one of them brought the line "Excuse me but I shat in my bed, can I sleep in yours tonight?" Worst part? It actually worked

  • @shennyboi110
    @shennyboi110 Год назад +732

    4:02 -“Did god have sex with an ostrich?-“ That’s got to be the MOST random setup line i’ve ever heard but the punchline actually works 😂

    • @Brass319
      @Brass319 9 месяцев назад +31

      does it?

    • @thatonecabridog
      @thatonecabridog 8 месяцев назад +28

      _does it?_

    • @robinchesterfield42
      @robinchesterfield42 7 месяцев назад

      Which god are we talking about? If it's Zeus, he DID actually bang a chick as a swan and have twins that were born from a frickin' egg...
      Mythology is fun. :P

    • @palmossi
      @palmossi 6 месяцев назад +1

      500th like!

    • @Mag3.1415
      @Mag3.1415 6 месяцев назад +1

      *_does it?_*

  • @Lassoloc
    @Lassoloc Год назад +127

    "Cabbage is just penis in disguise" gives a new meaning to Matt rubbing the cabbage in his lap in the intro

    • @luthorr000
      @luthorr000 6 месяцев назад +14

      I JUST REALIZED

    • @human01.1
      @human01.1 3 месяца назад

      "they have already breached our defences"

    • @hughcaldwell1034
      @hughcaldwell1034 3 месяца назад

      Best part is that lettuce used to be a potent sex symbol... okay, lettuce isn't cabbage, but come on...

  • @elisecode2212
    @elisecode2212 Год назад +209

    WAIT Matt stroking the cabbage at the beginning was foreshadowing. “Cabbage is just penis in disguise.” I feel so clever.

    • @ce7624
      @ce7624 Год назад +6

      You ARE so clever! I didn't realize until I read this comment, haha!

    • @elisecode2212
      @elisecode2212 Год назад +4

      @@ce7624 thanks lol

  • @shiny_lock
    @shiny_lock Год назад +321

    I'm surprised no one dared start with the word
    "Never"

  • @hobbytunez2519
    @hobbytunez2519 Год назад +235

    For those who don’t know, google translate tells me that the French one means “Hello, I’m in love.” Maybe everyone else can tell and I’m the idiot who only knows 1 French word, but it’s telling that the only somewhat affectionate pick-up line Reddit could come up with isn’t in English at all.

    • @N95j
      @N95j Год назад +4

      damn

    • @OntarioTrafficMan
      @OntarioTrafficMan Год назад +103

      3:15 it says "Hello, I burned infatuated" where burned is the adjective, not the verb. Basically it makes no sense.

    • @hobbytunez2519
      @hobbytunez2519 Год назад +42

      @@OntarioTrafficMan Ah… that’s more on brand for Reddit. This is why I had the “google translate” caveat. That’s probably what they used to make the post.

    • @MetaBloxer
      @MetaBloxer Год назад +22

      ​@@hobbytunez2519"brûlée" is probably from hearing "creme brûlée"

    • @hobbytunez2519
      @hobbytunez2519 Год назад +24

      @@MetaBloxer Okay, upon retrying the translation, I got something closer to what it actually means. I must’ve mistyped it or something the first time but you’re right, thinking about it now, they almost definitely just chose a random French word.

  • @SkyEcho751
    @SkyEcho751 Год назад +47

    The reaction of Matt telling his girlfriend a random pickup line constructed by the hive mind of reddit and her finding it nice is just, a knee-slapper.

  • @justin2308
    @justin2308 Год назад +48

    “I’m. Sorry.”
    Nono, that comes AFTER the pickup line.

  • @captainpalegg2860
    @captainpalegg2860 Год назад +193

    fun fact: there actually is a sub specifically for this kind of thing: r/onewordeach . not just pickup lines, either; could be anything from "what should i get my girlfriend for her birthday? owe" to "help i stole owen wilson's lucky underwear and now he's sending a hitman after me! owe"
    might be fun to do a video on that sometime.

    • @myyoutubeaccount4167
      @myyoutubeaccount4167 Год назад +1

      Sounds fun

    • @N95j
      @N95j Год назад +8

      why is owe at the end of both sentences? and im guessing owe = one word each.. but my question still stands

    • @captainpalegg2860
      @captainpalegg2860 Год назад

      exactly@@N95j

    • @MandMs05
      @MandMs05 Год назад +15

      @@N95j I have two guesses, the first one I thought of first the second one I think is more likely
      1: That's how you end a sentence, similar to "goodbye" on r/askouija
      2: These are post titles, and they're formatted to have "one word each" at the end of each title.

    • @fyra_cat2119
      @fyra_cat2119 Год назад +2

      ​@N95j probably so if someone sees the post out of context, they know it's one word each

  • @necron8992
    @necron8992 Год назад +204

    Matt sitting there with a cabbage between his legs was genius

  • @SavouryGalette
    @SavouryGalette 8 месяцев назад +31

    "No one DARES to suckle my t e e t before bathtime" made me laugh so unnecessarily hard.

  • @scarlett5065
    @scarlett5065 Год назад +933

    Moral of the story: no, reddit can not, in fact, write pick up lines with one word at a time
    Edit: The replies 💀💀 that took a dark turn FAST

    • @dantelawrence4676
      @dantelawrence4676 Год назад +28

      And I don't think RUclips, Twitter, 4Chan or Tumblr can either.

    • @itsAGMbtw
      @itsAGMbtw Год назад

      ​@@dantelawrence4676bet.
      Are

    • @idcgaming518
      @idcgaming518 Год назад +80

      ​@@dantelawrence4676I don't know. Tumblr went through a phase a few years back of absolutely nailing pickup lines.

    • @RushWheeler
      @RushWheeler Год назад +76

      Idk, "You look hotter than a sunburn on my aunt Pam" actually works pretty well.

    • @pvzgamerlegisniana6492
      @pvzgamerlegisniana6492 Год назад +26

      can youtube do it though?

  • @TheScrunker
    @TheScrunker Год назад +81

    man, your comedic timing is ON POINT. I was laughing my ass of the entire video because of it

  • @unnamellie
    @unnamellie Год назад +53

    "Can you help me financially"
    I felt that😢

  • @n_y_x_i
    @n_y_x_i 7 месяцев назад +108

    4:48 missed opportunity for them to spell
    “Tonight, WE STEAL THE MOON”

  • @Glegh
    @Glegh Год назад +410

    Matt caressing a lettuce made me feel something, something really wierd

    • @mrtwistr
      @mrtwistr Год назад

      remember cabbage is just penis in disguise....

    • @MielBeta
      @MielBeta Год назад +123

      "Lettuce is just a pp in disguise" WAIT

    • @dragos1239
      @dragos1239 Год назад

      ​@@MielBeta so he was masturbating the whole time...

    • @m_dwg
      @m_dwg Год назад +22

      It made me feel weird the first time too, but you just need to embrace the feeling. You will learn soon enough, then unlock a world you thought you could only ever visit in your dreams.

    • @ajmkittens9_YT
      @ajmkittens9_YT Год назад +9

      ​@@MielBetaOH WAIT I JUST REALIZED TOO

  • @rcotton3137
    @rcotton3137 Год назад +142

    The way he deliver it make it sound like an actual compliment 2:43

  • @TownOfMayvow
    @TownOfMayvow Год назад +99

    “Is your dad a terrorist? Cuz you are the bomb” WHAT THE FUCK

  • @KITT.007
    @KITT.007 Год назад +30

    “Let us get a table at McDicks” was my absolute favorite pickup line, made me snort

  • @GryphinHusky
    @GryphinHusky Год назад +77

    I was in an absolutely horrid mood, but now I'm crying and wheezing from laughing so hard. Ten out of ten, Matt.

  • @madysonandres9571
    @madysonandres9571 Год назад +228

    Reddit making up pickup lines is the funniest joke of the year.

  • @sammieegoldwand
    @sammieegoldwand Год назад +51

    Last night I randomly thought of the pickup line “are you a siren because you make me wanna jump into the ocean”
    It was 12 am and I now realize how fucking horrible that is.

    • @derekeastman7771
      @derekeastman7771 11 месяцев назад +4

      Are you a siren? Because I’d jump in the ocean after you. Still not great…

    • @thekicker2517
      @thekicker2517 10 месяцев назад

      Are you a siren? Because you're a man-eater with a voice that makes sailors drown themselves. That's definitely not going to work.

    • @kh6853
      @kh6853 9 месяцев назад

      Are you a siren? Because you make me want to tie myself to the mast

  • @jesper8836
    @jesper8836 Год назад +62

    I’m absolutely begging you do this again, I’ve already watched this 3 times and died cackling every time
    Edit: watched it for the fourth time and laughed so hard I was clutching my stomach and straining to fucking breathe. If I die, it’s gonna be because of this video. I was trying so hard not to just start screaming laughing, my whole family is asleep!

    • @kh6853
      @kh6853 9 месяцев назад +2

      How do not wake everyone up? Seriously

  • @KingDuckGuy
    @KingDuckGuy Год назад +62

    This is the most redditors have ever worked together and it's just beautiful. Like art.

    • @skinsarentskill259
      @skinsarentskill259 Год назад +1

      look up r/place

    • @Scypek
      @Scypek Год назад +1

      @@skinsarentskill259 and of course r/AskOuija.

    • @thereyvan
      @thereyvan Год назад

      ​@@Scypek as someone on r/AskOuija i can confirm this

    • @symmetricksambigrams
      @symmetricksambigrams Год назад

      ​@@skinsarentskill259no this is better than r/place

    • @aidanaylward9237
      @aidanaylward9237 10 месяцев назад

      ​@@skinsarentskill259getting flashbacks to bad apple being expertly drawn while Canada can't draw a fucking leaf

  • @alecity4877
    @alecity4877 Год назад +28

    your other half's reaction to the aunt pam's sunburn pickup line was the second best part of the video, only surpassed by the face you did afterwards.

  • @roundy4717
    @roundy4717 Год назад +48

    “Cabbage is just penis in disguise.”
    Matt: (petting his cabbage in front of the world)

  • @transbiologistthetransesto7956
    @transbiologistthetransesto7956 10 месяцев назад +17

    I keep trying to pick a favorite and I just keep rewatching. That one's my favorite

    • @XYZB0RG
      @XYZB0RG 8 месяцев назад +3

      I think transgender and biologist is a bit of an oxymoron, isn't it?

    • @CR1MSONACE
      @CR1MSONACE 6 месяцев назад

      ​@@XYZB0RGIf you had more than a basic biology textbook you would know Gender isn't just male or female. Mushrooms have roughly 6 Billion.

    • @olivercharles2930
      @olivercharles2930 6 месяцев назад

      @@XYZB0RGit is

    • @norged
      @norged 4 месяца назад +1

      @@XYZB0RG Truly

    • @BookWyrmOnAString
      @BookWyrmOnAString 2 месяца назад +1

      ​@@XYZB0RG thats like saying a cyborg programmer is an oxymoron. It doesn't make any sense

  • @CDG-PRODUCTIONS
    @CDG-PRODUCTIONS Год назад +149

    I remember in school back in the day I overheard 2 of my classmates talking about girls.
    In that conversation one of them said that how he got with his girlfriend was by following her everywhere she went, and when she asked why, he responded: *"Because my mother told me to always follow my dreams"*
    This has got to be the best pickup line I've ever heard. But I would be very careful doing this with someone!

    • @alansmithee419
      @alansmithee419 Год назад +6

      Maybe if you're out with some friends you can tail them for the outing.
      But yeah don't start randomly following someone. Very unlikely to go well.

  • @alpha_c.
    @alpha_c. Год назад +129

    2:11 the “(comma)” was a genius idea ngl

    • @knockingjack
      @knockingjack Год назад +5

      fr he thought of that

    • @luna_nova_09
      @luna_nova_09 11 месяцев назад +3

      …can you explain the difference please? My brain isn’t co-operating with me today

    • @alpha_c.
      @alpha_c. 11 месяцев назад

      @@luna_nova_09the initial idea you’d expect with “kids” is something about making babies, but “kids,” with the comma, implies that the person is talking to children, so pedophilia

    • @agentmc7868
      @agentmc7868 10 месяцев назад +8

      ​​@@luna_nova_09"kids now" Is like talking to kids or just referring to them
      And "kids, now" Is like saying "You should get pregnant, now!"

    • @luna_nova_09
      @luna_nova_09 10 месяцев назад +3

      @@agentmc7868 ohhh

  • @bag_head7
    @bag_head7 Год назад +141

    there’s something nice about Matt referring to his partner as his other half.

    • @RADZIO895
      @RADZIO895 Год назад +35

      that's not his partner, he literally split himself in half

    • @inker_monkey
      @inker_monkey Год назад +6

      he used a knockoff four sword

  • @wolf.haley48
    @wolf.haley48 Год назад +16

    PLEASE SEQUAL THIS IS MY FAVORITE EVER

  • @HeisenbergFam
    @HeisenbergFam Год назад +763

    Born too early to explore Space
    Born too late to explore Earth
    Born just in time to witness Reddit's pickup lines

  • @stapoldypropagandaaccount
    @stapoldypropagandaaccount Год назад +148

    3:17 "hello, i burned in love."

  • @aidanaylward9237
    @aidanaylward9237 Год назад +62

    "girl can you help me financially"
    Signed, the aroace community

  • @goldenapplesaga5446
    @goldenapplesaga5446 11 месяцев назад +9

    Bro im only half way through this video and this is proving to be my favorite Matt Rose video

  • @ftwgaming0
    @ftwgaming0 Год назад +25

    1:56 I love the thought of him not having soundproofing, Neighbours hear that late at night and decide "lol no."

  • @kindauncool
    @kindauncool Год назад +73

    3:00 puts the intro in a whole new light....

  • @anemonemilyyy
    @anemonemilyyy Год назад +22

    this got me actually doubled over from laughing too much. incredible editing, that put me over the edge

  • @TheStarLitLamb
    @TheStarLitLamb 10 месяцев назад +17

    "pubic hair dost not tangle if thou shave" was my favorite

  • @VsStuffs
    @VsStuffs Год назад +89

    Improved 3:06:
    "Lemme get us a table at M'Dick."

  • @GIGATHEMAD
    @GIGATHEMAD Год назад +104

    3:34 got me💀

  • @avvy0.2
    @avvy0.2 Год назад +117

    2:37 Matt is a rizz God fr

  • @thedetermined1
    @thedetermined1 Год назад +8

    About as smooth as sandpaper.

  • @TheSomeRandonGuy
    @TheSomeRandonGuy Год назад +31

    Matt with a blazer and a one piece shirt while drinking and petting cabbage is like a Austin powers villain and I love it

  • @quailthemudwing7371
    @quailthemudwing7371 Год назад +22

    I felt more loved in this video than I have my entire life

    • @delta0x
      @delta0x Год назад +7

      hey not sure how much of a joke this is but just wanted to let you know i love you

  • @edentitycrisis
    @edentitycrisis Год назад +11

    This might be the best one yet. It’s definitely my favorite, haven’t laughed that hard in a long time. Thanks Matt!

  • @AlexReynard
    @AlexReynard 11 месяцев назад +7

    I don't know _why_ this is my favorite video you've made, but I am in literal tears laughing right now.
    The cabbage foreshadowing was pristine brilliance.

  • @moonbatt
    @moonbatt Год назад +83

    Do not date the guy who asked, “What is a condom?”!

    • @husky0098
      @husky0098 Год назад +20

      No, no, he wants you to demonstrate, like when people say they don't know how shampoo works.

    • @moonbatt
      @moonbatt Год назад +4

      @@husky0098 😂😂 Is that really a thing?! 😂😂

    • @husky0098
      @husky0098 Год назад +3

      @@moonbatt It's a classic

    • @moonbatt
      @moonbatt Год назад +2

      @@husky0098 WOW! 🤣🤣🤣

    • @MamaTrixxieAsmr
      @MamaTrixxieAsmr Год назад +2

      ​@@moonbattlook up what the labelling on snow fairy shampoo says lol

  • @anakinstoppanickin
    @anakinstoppanickin Год назад +53

    “Everyone wants romance but nobody wants my gonads”
    I’ve never been so moved

  • @Sora-ING
    @Sora-ING Год назад +21

    These wouldn't be hilarious if we read them ourselves. The way Matt reads them is what breaks me🤣

  • @fiedlerheise
    @fiedlerheise Год назад +8

    "Are you going to poop first?"
    Dayum, I knew dates could get weird, but emotionally scarring card games never crossed my mind

  • @ameliatheginger
    @ameliatheginger Год назад +293

    reddit pickup lines are like drunk blonde girl combined with dementia and honestly i feel picked up

    • @Frying-the-snow
      @Frying-the-snow Год назад

      LMAO@@Chicken-1923

    • @Psichotica7
      @Psichotica7 Год назад +4

      @@Chicken-1923 😂

    • @chestnut4860
      @chestnut4860 Год назад +7

      Why specifically blonde?

    • @nive1592
      @nive1592 Год назад +1

      ​@@Chicken-1923plzz😂

    • @Psichotica7
      @Psichotica7 Год назад

      @@chestnut4860 Stereotype of blondes being dumb. Have you ever heard of a "dumb blonde joke"? More of a thing of the past.

  • @strawburri420
    @strawburri420 Год назад +741

    "black tights lightly skim your beautiful yet ghostly BUM HAIR." is one of the most haunting pickup lines i've ever heard
    edit: to answer the title's question, no. they say the most cursed words the in strangest ways and it just baffles me.

    • @beepboopboopbeep3
      @beepboopboopbeep3 Год назад +39

      What would make bum hair ghostly exactly? 🤔

    • @strawburri420
      @strawburri420 Год назад +9

      @@beepboopboopbeep3 only reddit knows.

    • @CircussCake
      @CircussCake Год назад +44

      @@beepboopboopbeep3 blonde bum hair?

    • @crimson6553
      @crimson6553 Год назад +64

      ​@@beepboopboopbeep3it slowly sways in the wind

    • @beepboopboopbeep3
      @beepboopboopbeep3 Год назад +34

      @@crimson6553 Sounds very majestic

  • @Torjuz
    @Torjuz Год назад +61

    3:48 - By far the best one LMAO

  • @ShadowsightSolos
    @ShadowsightSolos Год назад +13

    Short answer: No
    Long answer: No, but with examples

  • @czeianamiguel5543
    @czeianamiguel5543 Год назад +92

    4:32 He's confused, but he got the spirit😂

  • @bigboibebop
    @bigboibebop Год назад +103

    1:46 redditor moment

  • @luc11_
    @luc11_ Год назад +82

    if someone used any of these on me i’d probably marry them on the spot 💀

  • @QuadteRr
    @QuadteRr 6 месяцев назад +2

    For me, this is the best video on the channel. I just come back to it about once a month and can't breathe properly because while laughing at one hilariously delivered line, I hear another and laugh even harder. Simply brilliant.

  • @Tooberculosis
    @Tooberculosis Год назад +74

    4:22 if this doesn't work she's not the one

  • @_AstaLily
    @_AstaLily Год назад +63

    I reckon the person who turned 4:08 into sweet Caroline is British
    For some reason we can’t get enough of this song
    My best friend is always blasting it at full volume while she makes pancakes

    • @ravenvalentine9823
      @ravenvalentine9823 Год назад +20

      While this might for sure be true. I feel like equally Americans also do this? Because I have been present for numerous occasions where the phrase sweet Caroline has been uttered and the entire room busts out with the 'BAHBABAH'
      I like to think it might be a human thing. Something to unite us all.

    • @_AstaLily
      @_AstaLily Год назад +13

      @@ravenvalentine9823 Lol
      The song has weird powers

    • @elegianic
      @elegianic Год назад +2

      ​@@ravenvalentine9823at my school, that song is usually used for the bell and so I've grown to hate it, only for it to play in between sets at a show I went to, so it's definitely us Americans as well cuz everyone was singing along

  • @demo2823
    @demo2823 Год назад +20

    "When are we gonna kiss your dog?" is actually so clever because it implies that you will be going to their house and spending time getting affectionate with them there, it's just a matter of when. It's subtle like "so how do you like your eggs in the morning" used to be.
    It also implies that you are an animal lover, which, bonus.

    • @poihpioakarp8845
      @poihpioakarp8845 Год назад +3

      One of the only lines here that has a chance of working probably

  • @leonardrechain2626
    @leonardrechain2626 Год назад +42

    for those who didnt understand the french part, it can be roughly translated to: Hi, i burned your lover.

  • @billyredfern-webb7213
    @billyredfern-webb7213 Год назад +148

    2:51 guys, it fucking works, holy shit I'm 100% going to get some sloppy toppy with this.

  • @moonylizard
    @moonylizard Год назад +92

    3:25 "Are you my mom? 'Cause you look like my father's wife"

  • @ggggggg5987
    @ggggggg5987 Год назад +54

    3:43 I am obsessed with the using pal in flirting

  • @user-nu8xi4sl1e
    @user-nu8xi4sl1e Год назад +5

    "My horoscope told me the secret recipe to your heart" would've been so good if those added on words weren't there-

  • @ThatGuyMattewson
    @ThatGuyMattewson Год назад +109

    0:55 I lost it. Not even a minute in💀

    • @MrH.09
      @MrH.09 Год назад +6

      💀

    • @GenericPhantom1
      @GenericPhantom1 Год назад +4

      Honestly that's gotta work on like at least1 (ONE) woman on the earth.

    • @Orio435
      @Orio435 Год назад +2

      incredibly straightforward

    • @stupidmangoz
      @stupidmangoz 2 месяца назад

      This reminds me of Jacksepticeye from that one Evie bot episodes
      "Show me your genitals, your genitals, what? Show me your genitals, gentialiaaaa"

  • @yvonnest.pierre5963
    @yvonnest.pierre5963 Год назад +10

    How happy Mats wife sounded after the line was just amazing

  • @sweetdude1298
    @sweetdude1298 Год назад +72

    1:56 thanks Matt, I currently have toothache and by laughing so hard I coughed which aggravated it and is causing me lots of pain :)

    • @Cinnaschticks
      @Cinnaschticks Год назад +8

      I laughed so hard it made my stomach cramp worse. Nice to know I'm not the only one who decided to watch funny videos and managed to hurt myself more in the process. 😂

  • @SSYX336
    @SSYX336 8 месяцев назад +5

    Having pains in my side, watched this, pains got worse, 10/10.