@@sawyermccrary2187 normally I'd agree with you that awareness should be brought to fucking weirdos like this, but in this case it'd literally only line the weirdo's pocket with ad revenue.
Hehe, like a cringe buffer. You're driving into a brick wall of cringe at 50mph but there's a penguinz0 branded airbag to protect you from the strongest impact.
Bradon Hoover Ugh, what's so creepy about that is that he's apparently coaching people who walk around expressionless...or drooling or slack-jawed or something. Sure, it's all well and good when you start off forcing your best smile, but if she's dumb enough to take the bait, the mask will soon slip, and she'll know the horror of being stuck with an expressionless robot before long.
Seriously, I work in a grocery store and whenever a random stranger talks to me about something not pertaining to my job, it makes me really uncomfortable. Like I'm just trying to work.
As a cashier, I usually try to steer the convo to keep things from getting too awkward? Buying cat food? "How many cats do you have? What kind? ect" Getting camping stuff or s'more stuff? "Going camping soon? Got a plan for the weekend? ect" It really helps since I'm really fucking awkward at making small talk, so using their goods as a catalyst is just the easiest way I found to do it. I've literally had marks on my record because sometimes I wouldn't talk to customers if they didn't seem interested or if they're on their phone (maybe it's an important call, don't be rude). This guy is creepy as fuck, and if I had him, I would consider calling security, or at least a manager over so I wouldn't be alone with him. Yeesh!
Unless I actually know the person, I keep all of my conversions with employees are short and polite. The regular question of "how's your day" is not an invite for you to spill your life story nor to ask them for theirs.
jeffmurnahan There's no way she could resist his ice cream jokes. He even had to cut them from the video so he wouldn't be mobbed by pussy everywhere he went.
Knoxerboy101 when did i ever say this shit works, i was talking about a single thing he said and maybe you would know a thing or two about socializing as well if you actually did it lmfao, sounds to me like you’re projecting i bet you haven’t spoken to a single girl without them trying to get as far away from you as possible
"Talk to employees, they have to be nice to you." This is every female retail staff's worst nightmare. Please, just let us get through our miserable days.
Haha the other day I saw a guy ask the gas station clerk about her nails, then asked to touch them, all of them, which he then did. It was fairly incredible.
You bastards. No Fuck you. I got questions on where the goddam horse reels are, and quite frankly I don't give a shit about your miserable days when I HAVE TO FUCKING SUFFER BEING THERE JUST AS MUCH AS YOU. It's your godd damn job. So sorry, how you guys never know where anything is, and try your hardest to avoid being asked questions but you should fucking know. So yeah, fuck you.
@Zooted Ludes its just not how that works people who work at grocery stores are either 50 year old people who cant have any other jobs or 16-20 year old guys or girls who hate it and just doing it for the money, trust me, shit sucks and some random people just coming up to you talking about fucking icecream wont help.
Ugh, this is soo annoying.I used to work in retail and I hated the fact I had to be nice to every pervert, disgusting sleazes or angry assholes.Just because to boss told us"Be nice to peope or I'll tax you"
my skin literally CRAWLED when he touched her. a strange man coming up to you, picking out beauty products for you, and touching your arm SCREAMS sexual predator. that is SO CREEPY!!
@@KungFuKendrick Why are you defending that guy? He's a creep, point blank period. This comment clearly points out why, maybe you need to reread it. They didn't just talk about the arm touch. Put yourself in that girl's situation. Notice the red flags.
Hahahaha ooh man I’ve learned so much from this guy! I almost feel like I can pick up the next woman I meet at the grocery store! 😂😂😂 Recently discovered your channel and am enjoying your content so far man!
When moist yells it’s like the whole universe collapses. It sends chills down my spine so strong it’s indescribable. Moist’s intimidation is so powerful all you can do is drop down to your knees and beg for mercy
Please dont try and flirt with workers. It's extremely uncomfortable, as a person who has been hit on. I have no way to escape the interaction or call the person out or anything. Its terrifying
@Balthasar Gérard I live in a very small town. There was a 20 something year old girl who lived here, she was an amazing person and although I didn't know her too well, everyone else knew her. She was into anime, a cosplayer, a musician, and a very kind person. I used to see her at church. Anyway, this girl met a guy, whom she wasn't interested in, at her place of work (an art store). Because she rejected him, he went back to where she worked the next day and shot her 5 times before shooting himself. This is something girls are warned about from a very young age, and it's virtually every girl's worst nightmare. Of course things like this happen everyday, but it's even more shocking when it happens in your local town to someone you grew up with and everyone and your mother knew. You have to remember that people can be mentally unstable and very entitled, especially obsessive/creepy guys towards women in particular. If I was a 6'5, 250 pound male, it would be a different story. But I'm 5'4, 95 pounds--and a woman. So I will admit that I have pretty much 0 strength and can easily be taken advantage of. It's especially scary if you're an employee and that individual now knows where you work. You have to be careful when interacting with people, because you don't know who they are. Nowadays, it's only getting easier for people to track your location. A simple, "no thank you" or some other rejection, can actually get you shot by some crazy incel/mgtow/ect. who thinks they're entitled to women.
Everything she said was the shortest possible reply and the one time she tries to give him a little extra to work with he kinda loses it and doesn’t know what to do. Like she’s being paid or something to be here and still can’t stand this dude.
Sony Fanboy where did this idea of sexual favours come from? The options are: 1. He paid her to play the part of a stranger at the supermarket but he still made her uncomfortable. Or 2. She really is a stranger at the supermarket who is now extremely uncomfortable and is far more likely to be calling the police than performing any sexual favours. I’m not sure where the confusion arose but at no point was this discussion about whether she was there for money or performing sexual favours. I honestly can’t even imagine where that fits into this story or where you pulled it from.
Alysha Jenkinson - excellent idea, i just had a complete failure with a hot little cashier, gonna wait for her shift to end and follow her home and point at this comment for proof as to why she ought to be ok with it.
I would immediately kick him in the nuts to ensure his alpha testosterone dragon slaying knight in shining armor princess saving powers are diminished slightly.
If a girl catches your fancy make sure you stare her down, block her cart, and then joke about frozen food until you can "talk about doing it together sometime"
"Greeting, XX genetics carbon-based lifeform. Your endorphins levels rised at the sight of this compact frozen milk in a round cardboard shape. Can I probe you later ?"
I use this line at the grocery store "Oh hello there. I came here to get eggs and milk. You look like you want to get bred" ........... so smooooooooth 😆😆😆😆
I'd be turned off immediately if this is how a guy decided to start a conversation. It's cringey, boring, and predictable. The best way a guy was able to start a conversation with me in the grocery store was by asking a deep question about life. He was lighthearted about it and completely open to my response. It wasn't creepy or boring. He started it with, "Can I ask you a question?" It was so interesting to me, and we just kept talking for a couple hours in the aisle. He ended it by mentioning that we could finish the convo over text. I made absolute sure I got his last name in case I put in the wrong number. That was four years ago now, and we are as close as we've ever been.
Wierd to do it on purpose I agree but I have a good friend of two years who I met because we had to pool our cognitive resources to find the frozen veg section.
I found Allen on Facebook and to me it kind of looks like they both are (still?) married together. I could be wrong tho cause obviously the video is old af 😅
This is no joke. Under this mans tutelage i've slayed so much super market snatch that they've dedicated an entire isle to me at whole foods calling me poon handler of the decade.
@Cenestpasmapersonnalité *small brain overheating trying to understand what you're saying* Never watched Mean Girls so i've no idea what you're talking about, let's just wait for the yellow dude's answer.
Step 1: Grab her cart so she can't get away. Step 2: If she tries to run, tackle her to the ground and hold her there. Step 3: Make ice cream joke. Step 4: Introduce yourself. This part's important, otherwise. . . It could get a little awkward. Step 5: Ask about her. Things like "How are you today?"" What's your address?"" Do you live alone?" Remember, it's rude to only talk about yourself. Step 6: Take notice of one good feature she has, and make a compliment. For example "I wish I had your skin." And remember, persistence is the key to a woman's heart!
My future husband stared me down from across the grocery store and then forced me to talk about ice cream and soccer. Now we are together forever, I'm dead in his basement.
"hello female, do you too enjoy ice cream?"
If human says yes you say the. You say well you'll like my homemade cream.
I though this comment was coming from more of an incel angle, not robot one.
Yes, I too love putting ice cream in my mouth and letting it slide down my troat
Would you like to partake in the consumption of cold and flavored creams of ice?
"You want ice cream bitch?😠"
Gets em everytime.......
"I don't wanna make her uncomfortable"
*stares uncomfortably*
Lmfaooooo
"I don't wanna make her uncomfortable"
*unnecessary arm touch*
If that predatory stare is his best attempt to express empathy, I don't want to imagine how it looked if he tried to look predatory. Hard mode.
It's the most uncomfortable scene I've seen all week.
8:26 I love when he goes crazy, it’s so different from how he’s normally monotone
Lol
Bruh that bitch was powerful
That is captain price
He sounds like half a dozen A-list actors whose names I can't quite put my finger on. Edit: Tom Hanks
I watched this video when it came out and everytime I have watched it, it still brings me great joy
The moments everyone came for:
5:30 he smiles
8:26 he rages about donuts
happy Cinnamon sticc and 2 donuts likes!
That smile has me shitting my pants holy fuck
Don't forget, this guy started his video by saying "hello I'm Allen, co-founder of astromiruaskgg"
“I don’t want to make her uncomfortable.”
*Mission failed. We’ll get ‘em next time.*
Hahaha I could even hear the audio that goes with it
@@theomeester90 with the background music
@@johnfulcher8448 in some countries, smiling at people means you want to get into a relationship.
No we won't , we'll never get them
@@johnfulcher8448 people who unironically describe people as alpha or beta are gross.
How to Meet Victims At The Grocery Store
a comment with so many likes and zero replies is so unsatisfying, so i'm just gonna leave this reply dammit
I mean, the way he talks is exactly like how a serial killer talks to their victims.
Nick Gure 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Niiioga
Renn Oh god
“I know ice cream is very fun and very interesting”
The kids love it.
I love how Charlie is generally monotone in the way he speaks, and suddenly without warning goes full-on rage mode.
"Flirt with an employee. They have to be nice to you"
This man is a genius.
Fred
So sad
Big brain
surprised he didnt say they cant say no to me ;)
The one thing I really hate about working retail.
I feel like most of us use penguinz0 as a cringe shield, none of us could watch this video by ourselves
if it weren't for Mr. Moist and his groundbreaking wisecracks we'd all be fucked
death by cringe
Also, I don't want to give the originals the views
@@sawyermccrary2187 normally I'd agree with you that awareness should be brought to fucking weirdos like this, but in this case it'd literally only line the weirdo's pocket with ad revenue.
Hehe, like a cringe buffer. You're driving into a brick wall of cringe at 50mph but there's a penguinz0 branded airbag to protect you from the strongest impact.
8:26 i think we need more of moist being loud 😂
I love rewatching Charlie’s videos years later lmao
Why does the actress looks like she's held at gunpoint
She probably is.
Because she's a great actor who really got into the role 😂
She's taking the advice of this expert guru and keeping eye contact.
The Insensible Anthropod they probably brother and sister
She is
"The smile needs to be natural, and there's a couple ways you can fake that"
This comment killed me
😂😂😂😭😭
It's so weird that he has to fake being happy about meeting a woman, you don't HAVE to do that if it doesn't make you happy Alan
Bradon Hoover Ugh, what's so creepy about that is that he's apparently coaching people who walk around expressionless...or drooling or slack-jawed or something. Sure, it's all well and good when you start off forcing your best smile, but if she's dumb enough to take the bait, the mask will soon slip, and she'll know the horror of being stuck with an expressionless robot before long.
@Sachizakura Teach me Master
8:26 **in tears** okay man I like the chocolate doughnuts I’m sorry.
I haven't consumed a powdered donut since this video released. everytime there is one in my immediate vicinity all I can feel is all consuming fear
I like the idea that Alan spends all his time in supermarkets scouting out women and thought he was so good at it that he made a tutorial
This video should really be called "speedrunning getting peppersprayed"
Pepperspray Any%
RNG is a bitch
@@SuckyTiddy im ded
@@SuckyTiddy Any% all aisles
I want to see that
I'm really impressed that he's managed to convince us that she's not his sister
I'm not convinced....
You can literally see similar facial structure. They're atleast cousins lol
IVE BEEN THINKING THIS SINCE H3 REACTED TO THIS VIDEO YEARS AGO 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
definitely siblings or something. They have the same features lol
Huh
8:26 He's a very good voice actor! I came here from an animated version of this skit and I genuinely thought that he was pissed. Nice job! LOL
Who animated that?
@@bug8992 Captain Cling
@@DavidsWeirdMedia thank you
@@bug8992 You're welcome
He sounds like Adam Driver
Short haired Charles is unhinged
Short haired Charles is hot af
Ftfy
@@isveryniceyes I highly disagree. He's like Yamcha; The long hair really adds something that isn't there otherwise
"I see you're getting 2% milk. Is that because you think you're fat? 'Cuz you're not. You could be drinking whole milk if you wanted to."
@Zooted Ludes more like 69 ;)
@SKE more like 116
@Tristen Coronado more like 165
@@Funk_Monkey more like 169
@Zooted Ludes bro your reply has 6 thumbs up
*so far*
How to meet Penguinz0
Michael Ortega Except you gotta have a trumpet for that
This is the greatest critikaling of all time.
Nice piano skills, mate. This guy kills it with instrumental music if anyone is interested.
Go to Tampa ,Florida
How to meet god*
This video may be the only one where Charlie shows his true yelling power. We must take note of this
"I don't want to make her uncomfortable"
Meanwhile the actress: 😓😬
The “employees are paid to be nice to you” thing is exactly the reason you shouldn’t, you know, harass employees
Seriously, I work in a grocery store and whenever a random stranger talks to me about something not pertaining to my job, it makes me really uncomfortable. Like I'm just trying to work.
As a cashier, I usually try to steer the convo to keep things from getting too awkward? Buying cat food? "How many cats do you have? What kind? ect" Getting camping stuff or s'more stuff? "Going camping soon? Got a plan for the weekend? ect"
It really helps since I'm really fucking awkward at making small talk, so using their goods as a catalyst is just the easiest way I found to do it. I've literally had marks on my record because sometimes I wouldn't talk to customers if they didn't seem interested or if they're on their phone (maybe it's an important call, don't be rude).
This guy is creepy as fuck, and if I had him, I would consider calling security, or at least a manager over so I wouldn't be alone with him. Yeesh!
Hey, can I get some directions?
Unless I actually know the person, I keep all of my conversions with employees are short and polite. The regular question of "how's your day" is not an invite for you to spill your life story nor to ask them for theirs.
Where do you shop? Because this tomato would be great for your hair.
I bet he tried to hit on her after the video and she turned him down
jeffmurnahan There's no way she could resist his ice cream jokes. He even had to cut them from the video so he wouldn't be mobbed by pussy everywhere he went.
@@bubba99009 Oh boy
Then he had to eat the ice cream to comfort himself.
@@georgev7845 after he creamed her duhh..
Took him down*
He sounded like he tried teaching a class of middle schoolers for like 3 months before yelling at 8:30
That actress deserves an award for smiling through this train wreck.
"are you trying to be argumentative?"
He's becoming abusive before he even picked the girl up.
S-Tier
It's HER fault! She is making him hurt her. See what you made me do bitch!
carl brown I laughed so fucking hard 😂😂
Ca3 SaR just seems like playful sarcasm and if you deliver that with the right tone it can come off well enough imo
@@zKatari You sound like one of the perma virgins who think this pick-up artist shit actually works.
Knoxerboy101 when did i ever say this shit works, i was talking about a single thing he said and maybe you would know a thing or two about socializing as well if you actually did it lmfao, sounds to me like you’re projecting i bet you haven’t spoken to a single girl without them trying to get as far away from you as possible
"Talk to employees, they have to be nice to you." This is every female retail staff's worst nightmare. Please, just let us get through our miserable days.
Hey it makes men uncomfortable too it doesn't happen as much but I does
Haha the other day I saw a guy ask the gas station clerk about her nails, then asked to touch them, all of them, which he then did. It was fairly incredible.
I guess male retail employees just don’t exist then
@@island5317 Nice try smartass, the video wasn't about hitting on male retailers.
You bastards. No Fuck you. I got questions on where the goddam horse reels are, and quite frankly I don't give a shit about your miserable days when I HAVE TO FUCKING SUFFER BEING THERE JUST AS MUCH AS YOU. It's your godd damn job. So sorry, how you guys never know where anything is, and try your hardest to avoid being asked questions but you should fucking know. So yeah, fuck you.
"You started making jokes about the ice cream."
I fucking BURST out laughing. What a comedian!
This video is such a classic, I've been coming back to this when I need a good laugh for 2 years now.
"Flirt with an employee. They have to be nice to you." He's blatantly admitting that his strategy only works if they are being paid to talk to you
@Zooted Ludes its just not how that works people who work at grocery stores are either 50 year old people who cant have any other jobs or 16-20 year old guys or girls who hate it and just doing it for the money, trust me, shit sucks and some random people just coming up to you talking about fucking icecream wont help.
@@sanmedina unless you're ugly... it's the only time ugliness has its benefits 😭
Ugh, this is soo annoying.I used to work in retail and I hated the fact I had to be nice to every pervert, disgusting sleazes or angry assholes.Just because to boss told us"Be nice to peope or I'll tax you"
As a bartender I disagree. I'll tell you to leave me alone!
I feel terrible for the female employees at his local supermarket.
"I know that ice cream is very fun and very interesting" sounds like something a shapeshifting alien might say to try and blend in as a human...
"Hello, fellow human female.I too, like to ingest the delicious frozen dairy sorbet"
@@CyberWarezz05 😁
NOOOO hahahahahahahahahaha
Thank you.
@@DCBiscuit ?
8:27 Man, Charlie should really become a voice actor
*I swear, I ALWAYS COME BACK TO THIS VIDEO TO DIE LAUGHING* 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
my skin literally CRAWLED when he touched her. a strange man coming up to you, picking out beauty products for you, and touching your arm SCREAMS sexual predator. that is SO CREEPY!!
@@KungFuKendrick it's not just the arm touch, wise guy. it's his all of mannerisms put together.
I’m glad you were able to sniff that out
@@gabbievee lol
@@KungFuKendrick Why are you defending that guy? He's a creep, point blank period. This comment clearly points out why, maybe you need to reread it. They didn't just talk about the arm touch. Put yourself in that girl's situation. Notice the red flags.
No, wtf
*I'm shook, I've never heard you scream before*
HOLY SHIT That was like god commending me to hell in Dante’s 9th circle.
That was the funniest thing ive seen this week, LOL, he's always quiet and then all of a sudden he does that. I did not expect it at all lmao.
yeah holy shit.. thats going in my book of firsts.
I immediately got Vietnam Flashbacks from my father yelling at me
Now I'm level 100 woke
2:54 the way he walks and looks makes feel like a song for an early 2000s music video would start playing
8:26 This will always throw me off 🤣
He treats her like a shy animal he's trying not to spook
That’s what women are to simps & incels, fucking unicorns or pegasie
That's because he plans on eating her
@BillyJack85 *o u t*
Yeah it’s cause he’s a creep
@@BillyJack85 lmao bro
I tried this method on a girl at my local grocery store the other day and my wife was NOT thrilled! Do NOT follow this tutorial!
Is your wife single.?
@@joey19xx73 she will be soon
@@TheDisapprovingBunny I lol'd
Sheesh!!! Why do wives have to screw everything up.
My Husband wasnt happy either when I tried this.
Hahahaha ooh man I’ve learned so much from this guy! I almost feel like I can pick up the next woman I meet at the grocery store! 😂😂😂 Recently discovered your channel and am enjoying your content so far man!
When moist yells it’s like the whole universe collapses. It sends chills down my spine so strong it’s indescribable. Moist’s intimidation is so powerful all you can do is drop down to your knees and beg for mercy
- joke about icecream (???)
- grab firmly into her shopping cart
- ask what does she like to do for ''fun''
what could possibly go wrong
john sun other than a lawsuit because of sexual assult, seems fine 😂
Sounds like a porn intro
@@jacobmartinez2857 you sounds like a bitch cuh 👴
I think we all know what could possibly go wrong, but...hear me out. What could possibly go right?
Hahahahah🤣🤣🤣🤣
Please dont try and flirt with workers. It's extremely uncomfortable, as a person who has been hit on. I have no way to escape the interaction or call the person out or anything. Its terrifying
@Balthasar Gérard If it's an incel they'll get pissy
@@balthasargerard7246 yeah cuz that's easy
yuliza it is
@Balthasar Gérard
I live in a very small town. There was a 20 something year old girl who lived here, she was an amazing person and although I didn't know her too well, everyone else knew her. She was into anime, a cosplayer, a musician, and a very kind person. I used to see her at church. Anyway, this girl met a guy, whom she wasn't interested in, at her place of work (an art store). Because she rejected him, he went back to where she worked the next day and shot her 5 times before shooting himself.
This is something girls are warned about from a very young age, and it's virtually every girl's worst nightmare. Of course things like this happen everyday, but it's even more shocking when it happens in your local town to someone you grew up with and everyone and your mother knew.
You have to remember that people can be mentally unstable and very entitled, especially obsessive/creepy guys towards women in particular.
If I was a 6'5, 250 pound male, it would be a different story. But I'm 5'4, 95 pounds--and a woman. So I will admit that I have pretty much 0 strength and can easily be taken advantage of.
It's especially scary if you're an employee and that individual now knows where you work. You have to be careful when interacting with people, because you don't know who they are. Nowadays, it's only getting easier for people to track your location. A simple, "no thank you" or some other rejection, can actually get you shot by some crazy incel/mgtow/ect. who thinks they're entitled to women.
@@balthasargerard7246 How is that even remotely relevant to my point? Where did I say women cannot be bad people?
2:59 that was a perfect example of a predatory gaze
Alan is so confident that he filmed in front of the hair growth product. He doesn’t care what the girls think cause he knows he can get them anyway
I'm legit just watching her face the whole time, because you can easily tell she's insanely uncomfortable but has to look happy
Everything she said was the shortest possible reply and the one time she tries to give him a little extra to work with he kinda loses it and doesn’t know what to do.
Like she’s being paid or something to be here and still can’t stand this dude.
@@jotarokujo3603 she's most likely being paid to be in it lol which makes it even worse
Audrey Hartman that’s definitely my first assumption. This lady even tried to work with him and he just couldn’t handle speaking to a woman. 😂
Blok Vader Well, it’s better to be paid with money than having to perform sexual favors to a narcissist
Sony Fanboy where did this idea of sexual favours come from?
The options are:
1. He paid her to play the part of a stranger at the supermarket but he still made her uncomfortable.
Or
2. She really is a stranger at the supermarket who is now extremely uncomfortable and is far more likely to be calling the police than performing any sexual favours.
I’m not sure where the confusion arose but at no point was this discussion about whether she was there for money or performing sexual favours. I honestly can’t even imagine where that fits into this story or where you pulled it from.
*"That was a perfect example of eye contact"*
I felt so bad for her
she was actully laughing at him, not with him
en.dopl3r.com/memes/dank/what-you-see-vs-what-she-sees/94061 lol
🤤
Walking down the halls in hs smh
5:29 such a contagious smile
Squidward finally snapped, and used his clarinet to stab Spongebob.
"I like your cart"
"Thanks I picked it out myself"
Histury I can tell......
"I guess you scream for ice cream too, heh heh heh... heh."
"I'm an expert in carts. Watch this!"
*Steals girl's cart, drifts with it and crashes it into shelves*
Alan:**steals woman's soul**
"NOW THAT WAS A PERFECT EXAMPLE OF EYE CONTACT"
_👁Fetch😘me💋their😻souls👁_
Togarmah COD zombies reference. I see you are a man of culture.
Your soul is mine!
She has to be bat shit crazy to be involved with the guy that has a mug shot down at the post office.
FETCH ME THEIR SOULLSSSS
The deadpan delivery of the commentary was first rate. Enjoyed it.
Laughed my ass off at this one probably one of the funniest of all I have seen 😂
Some poor guy out there watched this and actually took advice
Wonder if he's still washing the pepper spray out of his eyes.
Worse than that, some poor girl was on the receiving end!
“haha ice cream more like you scream amirite anyways you do anal”
@@kwanyewdst9561 A man who cuts to the chase! I CAN FUCKING APPRECIATE THAT!
God, I was that guy once
If you mess up, wait at her car to explain things
Pickle Dick how do you find their car?
Ruler World Stole her keys then looked for the beeping car
If it’s unlocked wait in the backseat behind drivers seat
Alysha Jenkinson - excellent idea, i just had a complete failure with a hot little cashier, gonna wait for her shift to end and follow her home and point at this comment for proof as to why she ought to be ok with it.
I'm pickle dickkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
That’s actually not an actress, that’s an employee who is being paid to be nice to him
Well if I ever need to smile I can remember this amazing tutorial. Brings a smile to my face every time I see it
Hold your girl when Alan is around.
I would immediately kick him in the nuts to ensure his alpha testosterone dragon slaying knight in shining armor princess saving powers are diminished slightly.
I'm sure you and your girl could tag team the little incel lol
Otherwise he will make them costar in a tutorial with him.
alan would spell his name like that
I would need my girl to hold me man
If a girl catches your fancy make sure you stare her down, block her cart, and then joke about frozen food until you can "talk about doing it together sometime"
Unzipping your pants also helps.
@@thearousedeunuch what pants?
@@ericmendenhall2867 Just touch your private parts if you aren't wearing pants. :D
@@thearousedeunuch You can do that? Wont god get mad?
@@ericmendenhall2867 He will not like it, but he will understand your dating strategy.
“You’re my AA sponsor, that means you have to make this instructional video with me”
"Greeting, XX genetics carbon-based lifeform. Your endorphins levels rised at the sight of this compact frozen milk in a round cardboard shape. Can I probe you later ?"
Lmao
outSider Cain this is an underrated comment
LMAO
outSider Cain HAHAHAHHAHA
Lowkey that might work lmao
"I like your cart, it looks like you put things that you want to eat in there."
LMFAO this is subtle comedy at it's finest.
I reckon you could get that jk to work if u did it properly
General Panini underrated comment 💀
I use this line at the grocery store "Oh hello there. I came here to get eggs and milk. You look like you want to get bred" ........... so smooooooooth 😆😆😆😆
600th like
General Panini That porn probably exists
I come back every so often to this one
So special
Why did I get so caught off guard when he started yelling😂😂😭😭😭
"I know ice cream is fun and interesting, but I really want to know, what do you do for fun?" What an awkward and erratic method.
if you can't do, teach!
“Look at this fun ice cream. Jus LOOK AT IT!”
It's the language of gods you fool
erotic*
I'd be turned off immediately if this is how a guy decided to start a conversation. It's cringey, boring, and predictable.
The best way a guy was able to start a conversation with me in the grocery store was by asking a deep question about life. He was lighthearted about it and completely open to my response. It wasn't creepy or boring. He started it with, "Can I ask you a question?" It was so interesting to me, and we just kept talking for a couple hours in the aisle.
He ended it by mentioning that we could finish the convo over text. I made absolute sure I got his last name in case I put in the wrong number. That was four years ago now, and we are as close as we've ever been.
who goes to the grocery store to meet women though lmao
i do that all the time..but then after that i forget to buy things. lol
65 year old divorced men
Wierd to do it on purpose I agree but I have a good friend of two years who I met because we had to pool our cognitive resources to find the frozen veg section.
Mollie Strunk sad people who should leave others alone.
Mollie Strunk you'd be surprised
dawg the smiling bit is something i needed to watch bc I have not smiled since the beginning of 2019
This video cured my anxiety I was mid panic attack and this brought me to tears lolol
That actress deserves a medal for her bravery. Bet after filming the creep started practising his new video; How to talk with actresses you've hired
Oh No Fuck that actress, give Charlie a damn Oscar for 8:24!
“It’s perfect because you’re already paying her to be there”
Bubbles185 Maybe her husband and child are being held at gun point off-camera
Bh
I found Allen on Facebook and to me it kind of looks like they both are (still?) married together. I could be wrong tho cause obviously the video is old af 😅
This is no joke. Under this mans tutelage i've slayed so much super market snatch that they've dedicated an entire isle to me at whole foods calling me poon handler of the decade.
duke silver happen or it didn't pics
Holy fuck, respect
Legendary
Do they let you set up a booth to give free samples?
How long has this been at 420 likes
Instructions were unclear, I'm now being charged with stalking and sexual assault
He put so much energy in delivering the powdered donuts line, and I love it
Yep when I go to the grocery store my end goal is plow town.
When I go to the grocery store my end goal is to bring my tastebuds to FLAVORTOWN
When I go to the grocery store my end goal is to buy groceries at the store that sells groceries, a "grocery store" if you will.
Yep when i go to the grocery store my end goal is not dying of starvation.
ZombieKing ZKDev
My goal is to eat beans in an alley while watching cars 2 on one of the demo televisions
Devon Palmer isn't that everyone's ultimate goal when going to the grocery store? It's certainly mine.
"The smile needs to be natural"
*proceeds to tell you how to manufacture a smile*
I saw your profile picture and just remembered that that video existed.
Ik it’s painfully unnatural. He’s trying to fit in with the other humans
@@blokvader8283 what video
Her face at 4:42 is faker though
@@antoniorivera8321 This one: ruclips.net/video/PWe4xi5jsQM/видео.html
Watched this video in the past and watch it now is still hilarious and Charlie’s room and look are completely different
Alan makes me feel like I am the master of conversation
guy: 😒
girl: 😔
guy: 😏
girl: 😐
guy: so that was a perfect example of eye contact
Beautifully put
Why are you yellow?
@Cenestpasmapersonnalité was i rude? I'm so sorry i didn't mean to offend anyone.
@Cenestpasmapersonnalité *small brain overheating trying to understand what you're saying*
Never watched Mean Girls so i've no idea what you're talking about, let's just wait for the yellow dude's answer.
Damn, the yellow dude might be already dead.
Why are these pickup artists the least charismatic people in the universe
Because they pick up women with money but they dont show that part on camera
Because actual charasmatic people don't call themselves pick up artists or teach classes on how to be one lol
@User 0 I was all onboard baby, right until you talked about your house being possessed. I have no idea why you went there hahaha.
Because they think personal connections arent natural and need to be learned.
they have too much convidence in theirself
8:26
No wonder he's a SSS+ Lister, that acting is amazing, top notch, and an easy 100/100 on the moist meter.
**Pictures my loving wife to bring a natural smile to my face**
**Approaches woman**
He literally grabbed that womans cart when she was trynna get by
Oh hi, we meet again
@@markl4159 Oh , hi Mark
@@markl4159 I did nnnnnooooot.
Oh hi Mark.
Lol
I want to like it but it's at 666
He kind of looks like a creepy version of Sal from Impractical Jokers.
Lol that's why I clicked the video I thought it was vintage footage of him.
Implying Sal isnt creepy in the first place
@@sandpiper5705 nah, he's just Italian.
@@adamrose3139 same
Holy shit yeah he does
i think we should translate all of those women’s blinks into morse mode just in case
Everyone gangsta till Charlie talks in upper case
Step 1: Grab her cart so she can't get away.
Step 2: If she tries to run, tackle her to the ground and hold her there.
Step 3: Make ice cream joke.
Step 4: Introduce yourself. This part's important, otherwise. . . It could get a little awkward.
Step 5: Ask about her. Things like "How are you today?"" What's your address?"" Do you live alone?" Remember, it's rude to only talk about yourself.
Step 6: Take notice of one good feature she has, and make a compliment. For example "I wish I had your skin."
And remember, persistence is the key to a woman's heart!
Step 7: progressively make more body contact with her until she screams for help
[INSTRUCTIONS UNCLEAR] I got tased and put in cuffs instead
Must’ve messed this up because it didn’t work might need further instructions
Lol
Lol
World record speedrun - Sex offenders registry any%
Underrated
Just go take a piss near a school
Wait how would you know that
@@sebastianriz4703 sus
This put a smile on my face!
7:32 nothing says natural like the girl not moving a single muscle in her face
"That was a perfect example of eye contact."
actual eye contact: ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)
I think the good old Lenny fits better. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
That was honestly the best example I've ever seen of a dude undressing a chick with his eyes.
It’s at 420 I won’t be person to mess that up
Alan looks like a bug that transformed into a human but stopped on 90%
Men in black reference?
Reminds me of the bug in MIB. Vincent Danafrio or whatever
@@nibras162 hey lol yes
Tbf Chris kind of does too
This made my day
4:20 Legit this wut employees hate the MOST
I felt the earth move everytime I play back Charlie shouting at the end.
Nothing says “I’m a romantic guy” like stalking women in a grocery store
With this CV it is probably happening a lot.
8:27
Ok, that's not Charlie.
Charlie doesn't posses such level of emotion.
Of course he isnt Charlie what are you dumb?
Thats clearly Allen the alienator
@@baphometlovesyou6515 *Alan The Anihailator
@@thememeguy2135 Alan The Annihilator*
@@spacecadet_01 i actually did that to annoy him you know. spellchecking the spelling nazi.
He’s an A list actor what do you mean?
It's weird going back in his videos and him having short hair 😂 I'm use to the Jesus look 😂
“I’ve never smiled in my life”
Charlie, 2020
Well I haven’t seen you smile sooo
My future husband stared me down from across the grocery store and then forced me to talk about ice cream and soccer. Now we are together forever, I'm dead in his basement.
Homosexicle oof
thats hot
Now he has his very own ghost wife