I remember that I loved being alone as a child. Yes, I did play with others but I had no problem being alone for hours. I actually needed this and still do
Same. I actually realized I don't want a bf and every single reason why. Makes me wonder why I ever thought I needed one not that long ago. They don't complete me, they misunderstand, complicate, and cause me to lose track of the things I really want to do, since I easily sacrifice myself. Also, I mask so bad, I don't think it's healthy for me when I also am naive about a person's ethic and morality and what kind of person they really are. So bad combo. Plus the need for alone time is not a choice, and yet it causes all sorts of distrust and guilt shaming. It's not like I do the same things a guy does when they are having alone time🙄😔
I would sneak out of my room early in the morning during sleepovers and go hide in my parents room so I could get away from my friend for as long as possible until they woke up. LOL!
@@OliviaHops exactly why my fav game was hide and seek. I got so good at it after an hour I'd climb out of the spot and declare my victory.... But i didn't mind waiting extra long to come out.
Since receiving my co-diagnoses of ADHD and autism, specially re: autism, my wife now understands and accepts why I'm pretty solitary (few, very close friends) and okay with that.
My mum always says that my siblings are the weird ones because they can’t play alone, but I have always been able to. Now I’m starting to think I’m the weird one
Olivia, you have no idea how much relief your videos give me. My daughter is 3 and I am seeing literally all of these traits in her. My dearest hope is that she ends up being a happy adult.
Yes ! Great video. & I absolutely understand your hopes for her adulthood. My youngest daughter turned 3 in August. She is autistic & does almost all of these traits❤🧡💛 She's content in her ways & is overall very happy . Wouldn't have her any other way
from a autistic lady (me) she'll be fine I promise you. I wish I could go back in time and hug the little me that thought everything was going to fail for me and ended up with success. I wish could tell little me that things are going to be amazing.
My daughter was diagnosed The age of 2. She is now 12 and I am still trying to understand and navigate the world of ASD.. getting diagnosed early was a blessing. She started speech at the age of 2 and Behavioral therapy and started school for special needs and obviously still in special needs school today. That part been a blessing. My daughter understands everything but her social skills are not great. She cant have a conversation with me or anyone . She can speak but it's all scripting . Everything she watches on video or hears she remembers and scripts all day long .. I feel sad everyday . My daughter is happy that's what keeps me going ....
I haven't watched this video yet and I already agree with your comment! I'm terrible with decisions, don't give me choices just assign them😫😩 And I have a planner that I take with me everywhere, and I cross every single thing out from sunrise to sunset, from brushing my teeth to reading exactly six chapters in a book I'm reading at night. The struggle is real!
The “sitting and taking things in” is something I can definitely relate to. As a teenager, I remember that when I would meet new people, particularly in groups, I would just sit by myself watching and listening. It would need to do this many times before feeling like I “understood” them enough to assimilate into their group. It worked well for me at the time. I was a very attractive young women and my friend groups were always made up of guys, so they never seemed to care much when I wasn’t talking. They were just happy to have a pretty girl around! 😄
Between my daughter and me, I feel like we display all of these traits... we haven’t been diagnosed, but I started to suspect we might be on the spectrum when I was noticing a-typical behavior in my daughter. Started watching videos for her benefit and have found that I struggle with sensory issues (light, noise, bedding, clothing). I get super interested in topics (literally losing sleep over wanting to learn more) and become an expert and then get bummed that there’s no more to learn about that topic. Super meticulous about lots of tasks. Too exhausting to keep more than a couple close friends. I can read emotions well and am empathetic, but I react to and interpret unexpected sarcasm literally. Even if I know a person is joking, my first instinct is to take everything literally which makes me feel silly sometimes. Don’t you dare cover my nostril while kissing or I feel like I will suffocate. Same if the air in a room or car is too warm. My husband enjoys surprises and I do not. I want to know what’s coming - even if it’s a good thing! Probably amongst other things that I chalked up to me just being different.
There is a autism herbal recommendations I got about dr Oyalo and his herbal remedy has work perfectly on my sons improvements in speech and social skill and my son fine till now
Man, while I don't relate to delayed speech, that whole "taking everything in... feeding the computer" thing hits. When my friends introduce me to a new game, I want to sit and watch them play it, and have the chance to take in information about the basics before I ever get a controller in my hands. Trying to adjust to a new game while also having to make decisions in real-time is information overload and I don't much like it. Not to say I can't try out new games on my own, but I much prefer to watch if it's an active or FPS game.
Yeah, I don't think I had delayed speech either. In fact, according to my mom, I could read the license plate on my dad's dirt bike from a VERY early age before I properly learned how to read. That's more of an excel in speech development to me.
I didn't have delayed speech but, I did have a big problem with selective mutism. Oh and I still was put into speech class twice. I was also voted the most shyest person at the school.
Fk damn! I feel seen! 😄 I absolutely love the Assassin's Creed franchise and FarCry, but I avoided games like that for years, even told myself I didn't like them. Then I watched my (then new) partner play through them and felt much more confident in knowing what I was doing. I've since played nearly every title (working on the rest) and love it! I just needed to SEE how to play games like that first...
I recently realized I had so many meltdowns as a kid. I remember crying and going to my parents for help but when they asked me what was wrong I didnt know what was wrong. Existence just got really painful for seemingly no reason. And even if I did know what was wrong, I couldnt actually speak to tell them. The only word I could say when melting down was mom, which didnt really help.
I have a few memories as a child of throwing a fit and just yelling "I WANT TO GO HOME!" even if I already was home, lol. Didn't know why I was upset, or also couldn't describe why.
This reminds me of myself. Every single day in school if someone even looked at me the wrong way I’d break down crying and screaming, and then when asked why I’d say “I don’t know” or “it’s stupid.” My mom got me to go to the school counselor and all he did was tell me not to cry. Now I repress my feelings and cry when I try to tell people how I feel. I don’t know how nobody expected autism. I think there was so much focus on my diagnosed adhd sister, that since I still got good grades (she didnt) there couldn’t be anything wrong with me. It’s baffling
Me when I get off work and haven't eaten for 6-8 hours inside the grocery store at 1 am just slowly eyeballing every item expecting it to pop off the shelf and say" Here I am. You found me. Let's go fix your grumbling tummy." I mean I guess that's what I'm expecting. But then I see another human eventually and I realize how weird I am and I force myself to make executive decisions and get out of there. It's only been 45 minutes...
OMG! This was me!! When I was young, my aunt once took me shopping to pick something out as my birthday present and I made her go to several stores and still couldn't choose something. Lol.
I'm glad you pointed out that boys can present in the same way girls. As a guy, I didn't have the more stereotypical male traits and several of the traits you describe I recognize in myself based on what I can remember and what my parents have told me. Just goes to show that, as you said, everyone on the spectrum is different and not all of us fit in clear cut categories. Thanks Olivia!
I have extra long intestines have u ever had a ultra sound or colonoscopy? I take 40 fiber pillsa day ndrink 5 waters cheese anddairy isnot your friend or bread sory kid..
There is a autism herbal recommendations I got about dr Oyalo and his herbal remedy has work perfectly on my sons improvements in speech and social skill and my son fine till now
I was super interested in horses for many years as a child. I drew horses, read about horses, pretended to have horses, pretended to be a horse, all the time. I did play with other children at school, but most of my horse stuff was just me by myself. I also struggled with decisions, still do.
My dear you have changed my world. I am 66 years old never diagnosed but I knew/know that I was/am "different". So many of the traits you mentioned I had/have As a young adult I asked my mom if she was ever told that I was slow. My perception of life is different than everyone I know, while in most cases it has turned out that I was spot on, my process of facts are was different. Thanks to you I am going to investigate and address this further, LOL sound familiar. Thank you love.
I think they might have thought something was wrong at school. I was very shy and I could read almost as soon as they taught me the letters. I was reading my sister's school books for pleasure. They were six and ten years older than I.
I am an older woman. The freedom that you have instilled in me by explaining your personality traits, so identical to mine, and the acceptance of self, are precious. Thank you so much. You have made a huge difference in my life. I wish I had known these things years ago, but to know them now brings lots of peace.
I am a teacher and interact with autistic children, this helps me very much. My niece is autistic, this helps me understand her more. You are amazing. I am going to watch more of your videos, thanks for sharing your life experiences. God Bless!
This hit too close to home but I'm grateful you made this. My childhood sucked because no one was patient enough to understand me. I tried so hard to be "normal" most of my life and it was miserable.
#1: I also had delayed speech. Strange thing about me was when I did start talking, it was perfect. People would ask me to say complex words and I almost always pronounced them correctly. #2: I was also very shy. And well... I still am haha. As far as separation anxiety, there was a time I remember holding on to the porch rail so tight my mom actually couldn’t get me off of it to put me on the school bus. I was screaming and crying, wrapped around a post, pretty much immovable. I hated school all the way up through high school. #3: I pretty much had one friend through 4th grade and I liked the teachers more than I liked the kids my age. And my teachers liked me. But I moved from the country to the city after 4th grade, they were NOT my kind of people. I felt the teachers were no more mature than the children in my classes. And yeah, I had little interest in people... again I’m still that way. I have a girlfriend. She’s the only person I take a true, undying interest in. #4: I was an EXTREMELY picky eater. I would eat 3-4 peanut butter sandwiches a day for several years, partially out of routine. I can’t eat bitter things, I will spit out dark chocolate to this day. Textures are extremely important, I wouldn’t and still can’t let food touch, especially if it’s something with juice, like green beans, next to mashed potatoes. Nasty. Smells have always been a huge problem for me. My grandmother was making sourkraut one time and I couldn’t go in the house. Going down the detergent isle in the store still gives me a headache. Sound didn’t start bothering me till around high school. As far as clothing goes, I could wear most things, but I had a lot of trouble wearing something I hadn’t worn before, especially shoes. #5: Yep... I am completely inflexible. Routine wasn’t as big a deal when I was younger that I can remember, but that’s because I didn’t have a whole lot to put into a routine. Now that I’m working, breaks in routine completely throw me off. If we have a late start to the day, I’m actually worse off than if we did our regular 7:30 start to the work day. I work in construction, so honestly at this point, I’m so exhausted and deep into burnout that I don’t really have the capacity to actually freak out about smaller breaks in routine. However as someone on the spectrum, I just stared driving last week (I’m 23) and I’m definitely still capable of feeling the stress and anxiety from that haha. #6: I’ve had many special interests. And I’ll be honest, #1 is firearms, or as they’re better known to most people; guns XD Any time I see one, I can usually tell you what it is and what ammunition it fires. If you handed it to me, I could operate it as if I owned and was trained on it within a minute or two. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s no different from trains and the like. It’s a machine. The difference is, it’s small and simple. As an American, I’m lucky enough to be able to own them, so it’s something I can get my hands on and take apart, put back together, learn every piece and what it’s function is and so on. Firearms have a set of physics behind them that really fascinates me. Other special interests include music and... well now I’ve got a bunch of smaller ones that I can’t pick from to mention. Which brings us to... #7: Yeah no, I couldn’t and still can’t make decisions. I have very few opinions. If there’s not a logical reason to choose one thing over another, I can’t make the decision. Or if they have a very similar number of pros and cons, I’ll never make a solid decision. #8: This was less the case as a kid I think, I don’t really remember, but now it is definitely the case. Being someone that’s kinda hyper logical, my brain expends a lot of time and effort figuring out what the best way for something to go is, and if someone changes that, I’m not very happy, even if I don’t show it. There are a lot of people I just can’t work with and do things with, because my decisions are always questioned or changed, and I can’t handle that. It’s one of the biggest things that causes me to stim and start feeling like I need to be alone or I’m going to have a meltdown. #9: DEFINITELY had and have stomach issues. Now that I’m more in control and have an eating routine, same things, same time, every day aside from weekends, it’s a lot better. But apparently all my life, all the way back to being a baby, I wouldn’t eat because it hurt my stomach. I had the other problem. In 8th grade, my mom had to pick me up from school almost every other day for months because I would have stomach pain that would actually paralyze me. My muscles were so tense from it that they wouldn’t respond to my will to stand. Of course by the time I got home, that ended in me staying in the restroom a while. Not fun, especially for someone prone to sensory issues haha. I had to do this and hit on every point, because I relate so well. Im not actually diagnosed, and I don’t think I really want to be. I’m self diagnosed, and there are enough resources such as yourself that I can learn from and improve my life with that I don’t need to put it on my record. Unfortunately it can cause me to be dismissed from many things. But anyway, thank you for making these videos! They are very helpful. Keep up the good work.
@@toiwright6837 my grades were all A’s for as long as I was in a small town school. I was able to get the attention I needed and I was kept on track. I was officially diagnosed with ADD, however I now know through my own research, that doesn’t cover the entirety of my condition. I did have tudors. As long as they knew me and understood how I learned, I did really well with them. However by high school, I was failing every class, and I was so mentally burnt out that I didn’t care. I wore a leather jacket and sunglasses to be sure people avoided me as much as I avoided them so that I could get through the days. There were no good tudors to go to at that time either. So yeah, that’s the “short” answer haha.
My daughter sounds exactly like you. We sort of self diagnosed her ourselves recently (age 23). Her interest is in pets! Our dog was a therapy dog for her.
I hate making decisions. Especially picking a restaurant or what to eat. Didn't know this was also an autistic trait! I got diagnosed about a month ago and still learning so much :)
Yes, picking a restaurant is the WORST!! It can cause me to have a meltdown. Anyways, thanks so much for watching, Hanna! And congrats on your diagnosis!!
I relate a lot to your experience! I also didn’t tolerate loud places, noises, storm or new year made me cry and sometimes it still does. I didn’t like being hugged as a toddler and child. And I still don’t like it. I enjoyed my own company and didn’t care much about my peers. My interests were more like boys stereotypical- trams and magnets but not only there were also dolls. I didn’t play in roles I just created and set up a scene to watch it for hours. I was very shy and curious but I held questions back. I tried my best to figure things out on my own. I was a picky eater for some time, but I come from poverty so often there was no food at home or one thing only and no choice. But one thing makes me wonder - my flexibility. I’ve learned that to some point but as a child I didn’t tolerate changes. Now maybe it’s just my experience that I always have in mind that people generally don’t keep their word or don’t remember what they said. So I always have plan B
Your mom sounds incredible, and she seems like a strong support system! Would you ever do an interview with her to get her perspective on what it was like and any recommendations she has for parenting a child, more specifically a little girl, who has autism?
I am 54 and I have always sensed that I was different. I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was in my 20s so I thought that maybe that was why I felt that way but I wasn't sure. Recently I started watching videos about people with autism and there are things I relate to. Some things I have learned to stop doing so much. I used to be very inappropriate. Once and a while I can still be. I was very shy. I have never had a best friend in my life. I always believed people were talking about me in school. I have trouble socializing with people I don't know. If I am put on the spot I sometimes go blank and can't figure out what to say. This is just some of the traits I relate to.
What advice would you have for us boyfriends or husbands with an autistic girl in our lives? Update: Never mind. I just found your video on autism and romantic relationships.
That was a very interesting video. I have a diagnosis of Asperger Syndrome, and while I can definitely identify with some of the "classic" traits of Autism more associated with males, like you, I also have developed strong masking skills, and most people are surprised when I tell them I am on the spectrum. I credit a lot of this with watching a lot of TV shows and movies and imitating the way I see the characters interact on screen. I actually came to enjoy playing different "characters", (to a point). When I was a child though, my traits were much more obvious. I had pretty much every trait you mention, except I don't think I had delayed speech or gut issues. My mom has told me people thought I was like a "little old man", and I often got along better with adults than my peers. In my case though, I don't remember ever being disinterested in my peers. I was always desperate to make friends, but other kids often made fun of, rejected, and/or took advantage of me, and because of my difficulty with social cues, it was often difficult for me to determine if someone was making fun of me, leading to significant social anxiety. I definitely could (and did) entertain myself with solitary activities, but I don't remember ever passing up an opportunity to play with peers. I have always had obsessive and narrow interests, but they have shifted over time. Vacuum cleaners were my biggest obsession when I was little, but I've also been obsessively interested in music (particularly music artists), cars, history, languages, genealogy, and houses. (Old houses are definitely my biggest obsession). By the time I got to be high school age I was more self-aware, and I learned to mask well enough to get along with most of my peers, but it was always a struggle. Like you, I also jumped back and forth between groups of friends. The fact that I enjoy playing different "characters" played a big part in this. I also always loved talking in different accents, and I even came up with names for some of these "alter-egos".
Thanks for sharing...interesting to read and see your growth..Good luck to u ☘ I relate to wanting to have more friends too etc...had a few but nevwr felt totsmly close to ppl
Just diagnosed in 2022 at age 37. Painfully shy as a kid to the point that I literally cried and hid behind my mom if strangers talked to me. My mom also walked me to the restroom in public places until I was probably 13. I HATED clothes (still true lol). Dinosaurs were my special interest but girls weren’t supposed to like them 🙄 Thank you for these videos. I’m having a hard time right now with umm everything so relatable content is a small moment of relief.
I'm still shy. Separation anxiety. I prefer 1 on 1 time with any friends. It's hard for me to socially show that I care about them, and I get overwhelmed if they all want to talk to me often. Sensations have to be in my comfort zone. I haaaaate jeans. I can't handle the feeling of any cloth on my shoulders or arms unless it's extremely cold. I still need naps 😅 I emotionally feel like I want to cry when I don't have the food I want. I get really into my hobbies. I still can't make decisions ☹ I tend to pick an outfit and stick to it as my most comfortable outfit. Wish I could simply wear it every day. The idea of having a whole wardrobe for going into work sounds so stressful. I had constipation as a kid. Now it's diarrhea if anything at all is off. Having regular poop is so rare 😔
Aaaah I'm crying again! You're describing my daughter almost to a T! I'm so terrified that she's not going to have the same opportunities as other adults, but seeing you the way you are is giving me a lot of confidence and hope for her.
Introverts and creative people which is autistic people can get people far because they are intelligent as fuck and can focus more than others on getting educated
Dude. The gut issues. My son is going for an evaluation soon. He’s most likely ASD. he is at the point of making his own language. I love these videos. You are helping me so much. I’m thinking I’m on the spectrum too but I’m afraid to get tested. You’re so brave. I can’t thank you enough
Thank you, Olivia! You have helped me learn so much. I play imaginary "characters" with my granddaughter on the floor. She absolutely LOVES our one on one time together. She is very controlling when it comes to our playtime. She makes all the rules and I must comply 😀. She pretty much controls the whole playtime. Telling me who I "can be", what I can say, what "the story is", what to pretend, what I can touch, or not. She has most of the traits you describe. I love this child more than anything in the world and want to help make her childhood and future life positive. She has been a huge blessing to me. I wish you would do a question and answer type forum. I would pay for a subscription if it were offered by you.
Thanks so much for this sweet comment, Julie! And for watching my video. I'm honored it could help you learn something. Your granddaughter sounds very similar to how I was with my imaginative play. I still have imaginary characters that's I've "known" since I was 11. Your granddaughter is awesome and she can do anything she puts her mind to. Thank you for watching over her and wanting to make sure she has a great future. God Bless both of you! And I'll definitely look up how to do a question and answer forum/video. Thanks for the idea!
I’ve never been diagnosed, but I became very interested in researching autism in 2010 when my then-two-year-old nonverbal grandson was diagnosed as severely autistic, at the low-functioning end of the spectrum. The more I read and watched about the subject, the more convinced I became that I may well be a high-functioning autistic. Watching this video, I felt you could have been telling my story, except that I began speaking quite early but didn’t walk until much later. I’ve never heard of anyone, male or female, with as many similarities before, particularly the difficulty in decision-making, the intensity with which I, even now, still approach every new interest, and the lackadaisical approach to associating with friends. I also have been aware, even prior to beginning to research my grandchild’s condition, that I’ve always, since my earliest childhood memories, been very uncomfortable looking anyone in the eyes. Anyway, I appreciate your candid synopsis and have, just now, subscribed to your channel. Thank you.
Both my children were painfully shy and had severe separation anxiety as pre-schoolers and early elementary school. I always felt their teachers were so judgmental of me and assumed their behavior was caused by my overprinting/"helicopter parenting". I wish teachers would educate themselves about early signs of ASD. One of my children would scream at other children when they approached to play at the park. I didn't know what to make of it at the time, but the disinterest in other children persisted for years.
Thank you Olivia. My mom said at the end of the school year my kindergarten teacher confessed to my mom that I cried everyday at school. When she finally asked me why I said because the bus was too loud and it smelled bad. This was 36 or 37 years ago and I still remember.
I just wanted to thank you. I've always thought I was just weird but your videos made me realize I'm autistic. I've gone through almost the same things as you. And I still cant make decisions and I'm 35. I feel like a child. I'm codependent really bad. I dont know what to do to get help and I dont have anyone to help me. And I definitely cant afford medical. I feel lost because I cant be normal and everyone avoids me. Thank you for your videos tho. Your helping realize I'm not just weird, theres a reason to my madness. ♥️
My daughter didn't do sleepovers (and even now she's 18 she doesn't like parties). She has good friends, but they are all kept at a bit of a distance. Also struggles to make decisions - MUCH prefers someone else to make decisions for her. Routine very important!
This video was EXTREMELY helpful to me as a mother of an autistic 3 year old. I’m filled with so much hope and joy for my daughter’s future. Thank you for lifting this mama’s worries off of her shoulders! God bless!
BOSSY! Yup that's also our daughter. My husband got her a tshirt that she wears with pride. It says "I'm not bossy! I just have great leadership skills" :-)
I sometimes faint in crowds. Total overwhelm. Sensory issues: yup. Love my alone time. Maybe, hmmm. I’m 50 now so it certainly could’ve been missed. I always was super sensitive and cried easily. Get obsessive about things. I do prefer a combo routine of structure & variety. Am highly psychic. Anyone know how to get tested as an adult? Mostly just…curious. 😀
Yes I’m 55 and just diagnosed. I have similar traits to yours. I would scream and cry at those nature videos and the images would haunt me and replay in my head to the point it gave me anxiety and I couldn’t sleep thinking of the poor baby antílope that was killed and eaten by the lion. 🥺 That sensitivity sort of crosses into intuitive/psychic senses. I have heard the testing can be expensive. Luckily my insurance covered 100%. If you have insurance for “mental health” (I hate that term) then you have to find someone that does the testing. It’s a specialty sort of thing. Then you do the testing. For me that was an interview, answering 6 pages of questions, more interviews, some A.D.D test I think was called a TOVA test, and a series of puzzles and more questions/interview with another specialist that judged me on my answers and if my feet were constantly fidgeting, choice of words for the answers, etc. I want to say the process was a month or so.
I had church people come to visit uninvited when I was in my pajamas. My spouse let them in. We made small take and then I heard me say u need to get out. They looked shocked. I said again. U were not invited u need to leave. And they left. I felt bad for a while and not being welcoming then I felt ok about it. Still do. But it was visually I could not stand them one more minute
Omg..I have an 11 year old super awesome girl with every. Single. Trait. You. Listed. I know this sounds so weird but for the longest time I was oblivious to the difference in her behavior vs her peers etc. When people started telling me that they saw traits 9 years ago I thought THEY we're wrong. I started thinking that it was MY FAULT and I don't won't my daughter to get bullied etc. I've finally found an amazing Dr that's helping us do thesurveysvwith her teachers about what they notice. But then I realized that autism, asbergers and ADHD are in the same "family" and low and behold I was diagnosed with ADHD 8 YEARS AGO. my daughter is obcessed with dragons, mythology and techno music. I was watching you talk and I thought omg I never would have known and you're so brilliant and awesome. But even though we have the ball rolling for an official diagnosis, I truly need it only to help with schoolwork and mainly math. Otherwise, I can't imagine having it any other way and I always tell her that's being different is a gift. I'm so happy I found your channel. Ugh I wanna cry. Ty so much for doing this you have no idea how much you've helped me. Oh btw see the ADHD in my comment/writing style? Lol! Love from Louisiana
THIS ^^^ yes, ALL of this describes me as a child too, other playmates were very cruel while I was growing up, I also had an older brother that drove me absolutely insane lol, playmates saying I did not have a right to be into horses as much as I was because I did not know how to ride one, I always fell off and was quite nervous having to get on one, but I loved loved loved being around them, the smell of them lol yes i know weird and talking to them, and brushing their coat, like having a close friend sort to speak. I enjoy being alone too and have to tell my family i need a set amount of time to be by myself without interruptions, or else i too have amajor 2 yr old melt down, and i am 51 yrs old, I'm such a terrible peron and i wish i could be better and normal. my kids and petsand everybody in my life deserve a better mom, friend, wife, ect. I have too many unfinished craft projects too and here I am watching videos
Hi Olivia, my daughter is 19, and I guess I always felt that she was different in her own little ways when she was little. But listening to your videos I now believe that she has had autism this whole time. Of course I can diagnose her myself but she has always had her corky ways, facial expressions and melt downs and alot more. Thank u for posting you videos. I have learned alot.
Olivia, thanks for your videos. I can understand myself like never before thanks to you. When I watched your first video I started to wonder if I were autistic. And I am. You have literally CHANGED MY LIFE
Wow! Maria, this comment means the world to me. Thank you so much for sharing that I could help you understand yourself better. I'm honored. That is my main goal, so I'm so excited to hear they could help you. God Bless!!
Difficulty Making Decisions: On the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, the clearest trait for me is Intuitive (caught up in ideas, low connection to the details of the world around me (especially time)), but the second-most clear trait is Perception. Perceptive people take in data and are good at picking up new details; Judgement people are good at sorting through data, narrowing down options, and making decisions. The extreme Perceptives (divorced from that Judgment trait) are horrible at narrowing down options. For me, it's very difficult to decide on X because it means that YZQRM are now not part of the picture, and they might be cool too! Which is why it's so hard for me to make decisions while writing, and cut out possibilities. Another trait I've never connected with being atypical. Man, all these things that I've known about myself for a long time but am now considering through a new lens...
@@karablack8336 I am INTJ, and want to tell you the percentage of each because I utterly obsessed over MBTI for about 10 years, and my daughter told me a few months ago she thinks I'm Autistic. I'm 52 years old and already figured out on my own that I am depressed, ADHD, dyscalculic and dyslexic and severely gluten intolerant. Kind of getting sick of labels.
There are alot of similarities between you and myself as a child. I was also obsessed with horses (now it's cats ) as a child and used to ride all the time. I also had a gender identity problem and thought that girls were sissies. Naturally, I was a tomboy. Back in my day, they knew little about autism and I was diagnosed really late.
I used to change my outfits 3-4 times a day. I didn’t feel confortable in anything. But I learned to speak and walk quite early. The first being I had conversations with, was our cat, in a weird language I made up. I didn’t talk to humans at first.
Olivia, thank you sooo much for your videos! I am 51 years old and just now realizing that I am autistic. Everything you talk about I'm sitting here going YEESSSS that's me! Thanks to you I'm trying to make a list to take to my new doctor so that we can talk about getting me tested. All my life I just thought I was crazy but I see now that's not the case. Again thank you for all you do to help everyone on the spectrum. Much love.
Hey, L! Thank you so much for watching my video and for sharing this awesome comment with me! I'm so excited my video could help you. That's my goal when I make them! You're awesome, and I wish you the best of luck on your diagnosis journey!
My 15 year old was just diagnosed with ASD, your diagnosis came even later. My kid had every one of these traits that you mention and was flagged early for speech therapy and physical therapy, but never for ASD. I feel like there are a lot of undiagnosed cases out there!
Yes like my daughter for example I keep asking for her to get tested but never get the recommendations. She is 8 and has the comprehension of a 3 year old.... She is speech therapy through the doctor and her school but I still can't get the recommendation needed.... Is it because I'm in the state of CA? Seems like the Doctors out here not trying to hear my concerns.....
I have never been diagnosed, but highly suspect I may have some form of Autism. I'm old, really old. And I didn't really "get things" maybe all adults should know. Like if someone died, I know to say I'm sorry. But the deeper thoughts, my brain never went there. I was called "Spacy Stacy" in Highschool. Cute name, but it was everybit true! I never thought to ask about the other person, maybe at that age I "didn't" care. I know I do now! Since recovering from an Opiate Addiction, I have remained sober for over 7 years. I have not had one "SINGLE THOUGHT" OF TAKING ANY EXTRA FOR A HIGH OR EUPHORIC FEELING. I HAVE HAD 3 MAJOR SURGERIES, I WAS SCARED TO TAKE THEM. I THOUGHT SOMETHING WOULD MAKE ME WANT MORE LIKE IT ALWAYS HAD BEFORE, BUT IT DIDN'T. I TOOK THEM AS NEEDED (WHAT A CONCEPT) I CAN SAY THAT'S DONE!!! I'M NOT THAT PERSON ANY LONGER..... I am free, present, accountable, and humbled. Thank You?
Congrats on being sober for 7 years, Stacy. That's incredible! You should be SO proud of yourself! And I can relate to the someone dying thing. It's hard for me to find empathy even though I try.
So AWESOME for taking the time to say something. Would it matter if I continue to go undiagnosed officially?? Or is there a reason I should seek treatment. My birthdate says I am 49 and will be 50 on June 21st. I say I am not older than 35 in my brain! Light and love from God Above! & Me too!
This sounds to the “t” like my 3 year old daughter. Thank you for speaking out ❤️ we are getting her evaluated this summer so that I know the best ways to help her
My daughter diagnosed with Asperger's 2021. Literally as you describe ! You're amazing! Having hit puberty she has become the most defiant rude uncaring blunt individual. There is literally no explaining to her how rude and inappropriate she is . I'm trying to educate her on social skills to help her but she is adament how she is is totally ok and doesnt need my help or advice and if anyone finds her rude then they can get lost . She knows right from wrong and respect and manners but is adament that family and people she doesnt have time for dont need that respect. Its unbearable and concerned she will isolate herself .
Were you ever bullied as a child? I ask because I'm also an autistic female who was diagnosed as an adult, and I fit 8 out of 9 of your criteria. It's strange. I'm angrier at the way adults treated me than the way the other children did. Does that make any sense?
Hey Amy, thanks so much for watching my video and reaching out to me. I actually wasn't ever bullied as a kid. I had a couple instances like I'm sure everyone does at some point, but overall, I was not at all. I went to a small Christian school, so that's probably why. And what you said totally makes sense. It's interesting because Covid started right after I was diagnosed, so I haven't been around adults yet since finding out so I don't know how they'd treat me. I'm sorry they are treating you bad. That's terrible!
Kids are kids. They act the way the adults around them do. So if the adults are mistreating you, the kids will too. If the adults are compassionate, the kids will follow their example. So yes, it absolutely makes sense. When I got bullied, I went to my mother for comfort, and she said "What do you want ME to do?" meaning go away and stop bothering me. I just stared at her. How can a ten year old tell an adult "I just want you to tell me you love me, and not to pay attention to those mean boys." Even at the time, I was far more upset by her reaction than whatever the boys did. I don't even remember that. tl;dr: You're not alone. Adult are responsible, kids aren't. They learn what they live.
@@fogweaver5633 oh god yes!!!! I have resentment over how parental figures behaved when I said I was being gossiped about..not outright bullying but girls being bitchy,being shy didn't help already and that stuff just escalated it easily ..teachers weren't helpful either
I was, but it bothered me more that I didn't understand why. I also asked before, but nobody would ever give me an answer. I had one bully whom I kinda miss. I changed her to a protector over a cookie I didn't like. She busted my lip and face, and my mom went nuts over it. I had to go to the dentist, and we went to the store after for a rare treat. I finally decided on the one thing I hadn't tried. The gingerbread cookie. It was cute, the story was cute.. It tasted awful. I didn't like it, but mom was a single mom, and $ was tight, so I couldn't waste it.. then the bully sat down next to me. Her lip was busted like mine, which was weird cause none of the other kids would have hurt her. So when she asked me what I was looking at and what I wanted, I gave her the cookie. To be honest, I just couldn't bear to eat it or waste it, and as I couldn't make a decision, I just gave it to her for her to decide. Lol. She actually taught me a lot.
Livi! So proud of you and the you've come so far, since (ehum) your kicking days playing football for me, not to mention your childhood. Your parents are pretty cool people. Oh and Bratt, we she's okay too! Keep helping those in need. God knows! Love you.
Aw, thanks so much for watching my video, Coach!! Football was about the only place I wasn't shy because I thought if I was, I'd get eaten alive lol. Thanks for making me feel welcomed from Day 1. Love you!
Every time I watch one of your videos, I feel validated. This one really spoke to me. I had every single trait growing up. Thank you for these videos, they truly help make me feel more comfortable being a girl on the spectrum. ❤️
My daughter who is 6 was diagnosed at 3, but we started in home sessions at 2 because we knew something was different. She has a twin sister, which she heavily relies on in decision making. She always has to know what sister is doing before she makes a decision and it’s usually whatever her sister wants. She has about 4 of the traits you listed as well. I think in most areas having a twin has helped but in some it’s really hindered. She really depends on her sister. It’s sweet now because they are 6....who knows what the future holds.
My twins are 21 now, one is diagnosed autistic. They both live independently, though the confirmed autistic one does get more help day to day in living arrangements, but when they were young they definitely relied on their twin more. The point? Your twins will do just fine, they'll find their way, even if that is with supports. ☺️
For me, I didn't have a lot of close friends, but not because I didn't want to. In fact, I REALLY wanted to. I just wasn't socially adept enough to gain deeper friendships or be able to keep close friends. Like I had a LOT of acquaintances and people I considered friends at school, but rarely was I invited to anything when they got together outside of school and even if I was, I felt like the odd one out and not as close as everyone else. And when I managed to get close friendships, they would eventually fade away or just straight up say they didn't want to be friends with me anymore. It was often because I was "too much" as in I way overshared, info-dumped, and especially trauma-dumped in middle/high school because I didn't know what was "socially appropriate" and people just couldn't handle it after a while
Loving all of your videos, they resonate so much and are very helpful! As for the "bossy" trait, I saw a quote once that said, "I'm not bossy...I'm just aggressively helpful," and I was like, YES! YES, YES YES! That's us! 😁
Hi Olivia, like you, I had the same traits, but until recently, I never had an answer for why, I only found out what my issue/condition was until late 2021, I'm now 61 and understanding myself a whole lot better, but still have the same problems.
My now 19 yr old son used to have constipation too all the time. He's gut issues are much better now. Thanks so much for your videos! I am a huge fan for yours!
Ok Olivia, thank you So very much!!! You have changed our world in such a positive way. I am deeply grateful for all you share. Our 10 year old daughter is on the autism spectrum. We are finally getting answers and any help she needs. It was you who made it really click, and motivated me to get her tested. Thank you so much!!!
Been there, done all that. You know I think maybe I am on the spectrum. Two of my children were. By the way, the gut problems...I found out what foods I was sensitive to and removed them from my diet and drank more water. Gut issues are now resolved. 🙂
Thank you for sharing about your speech delay-my daughter also had her own language! Her speech came in slowly between the ages of 3 and 5. And of course, now at 7 she’s a nonstop chatterbox.
Too funny, Sharon!! I have to say, I'm quite the chatterbox when it's on a topic of a special interest lol. Is she the same? Thanks so much for watching my video and sharing. Your daughter is awesome and can do anything she puts her mind to!
@@OliviaHops My Carolyn loves talking about everything and asking a million questions. She’s a joy but is exhausting. 😂 If you ask her what she wants to be when she grows up her answer is “I want to do everything.” Lol. We’ll see how her path unfolds, thank you for your videos because they help me support her dreams. Many, many thanks Olivia!
My autistic daughter (diagnosed age 13) had this EXACT same issue with food and hypoglycemia as a young child. Thank you for sharing your experience and for mentioning that others have said that this happened to them as well. I look forward to when doctors/pediatricians are more aware that this might be an early sign of autism. Our pediatrician certainly did not think it was unusual.
“I never wore pants”. As a British person I had to translate that in my head to US talk 🤣 But really, you have just described me in this top traits yet my doc brushed me off when I tried to talk to them
I am 66 y/o and just learned 2 years ago that I'm an Aspie. (I know Aspie is no longer used but it's who I am.) I'm retired and glad I made it this far. I've always had gut issues, hate certain foods because of their texture, and take forever to make decisions. Since retiring, I've finally found supplements that work wonders for me and I'm as regular as clockwork. Thank you for this video and for putting yourself "out there".
My daughter (17) is autistic and I can confirm that she has great difficulty making decisions, even between things that she likes (so, two really good options). What I have found works best is for me to tell her the options and then I tell her which one I have chosen for her. Then she will tell me if she is okay with my choice. I don't know why it's easier for her when presented this way, but it is!
My grand daughter was being given 2 options for nearly everything so it's easier for her to choose. I did notice in my most recent visit she is given more options now and she handles it well. Eg 4 types of drink options instead of two. She is 6.
Thank you!! You just described so many things that I did as a kid that I never understood before. I was just recently diagnosed, I was misdiagnosed as bipolar and then wondered if it was borderline personality but no. It’s high functioning autism. It fits like a glove, I feel so relieved and more accepting of myself now. Your videos are helping me so much I can’t thank you enough. It’s nice to feel a part of the world now instead of an alien no one understands.
Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. I have a 5 year old daughter who were are in the process of getting a diagnosis for right now. I highly suspect she has high functioning ASD. She has always been very sensory sensitive, and was diagnosed with SPD at the age of 2. Although, I knew she had SPD or ASD when she was 12 hours old. She was a very hard baby, and was never ever happy. She would scream for hours on end, and was never able to be consoled. She has always been very sensitive to noises, touch, tastes, smells. She also has the constipation and gut issues. She will withhold bowel movements, or simply just doesn’t have the urge to go everyday. She will literally starve herself rather than eat any texture of food she finds difficult to handle. She has described certain textures as feeling like glass or needles in her mouth. She has an abnormal response to pain at times as well. She will scream for the nurse at the pediatrician’s office to give her another shot. She will scream at me or my husband to kick her (which we would never do), and she has hurt herself. Did you ever have self harm tendencies? If so, how did you overcome it as you got older. I worry very much for her as she ages and becomes a teenager. Her psychologist will also be working with her on overcoming this as well. She also has a very hard time with emotional regulation and the meltdowns are so bad at times. She has shown some OCD traits,a nod ADHD traits as well, and struggles badly with anxiety. So I’m hoping we can get an accurate diagnosis for her. There are so many times I feel she fits perfectly on the ASD spectrum, and other times I wonder if I’m making something out of nothing. I guess maybe that’s part of the masking? This was long. Thank you for reading it if you got this far. Thank you for your channel. I will be watching more of your videos to try and learn more to try to help my baby girl.
I have Autism, ADHD and some OCD traits. I also have issues with emotional regulation and anxiety. I struggle with self harm especially when I was younger. Your daughter is too young but when she is a teenager DBT might help. It helped me a lot and I hear there is a new variety of DBT that is geared more towards Autism. I don't know if this helps, but good luck with your daughter. I hope things go well for her.
How is your daughter going now? I suspect ASD in mine well I am certain. She is almost 5 and although she doesnt self harm she very much struggles with emotional regulation.
I have pretty much all of the traits you mentioned, except I had early speech. Everything else (even intestinal issues…. I’m gluten intolerant). Thank you for sharing.
My daughter’s childhood was exactly like yours in every way except speech. She was the polar opposite, with a huge vocabulary by age 18 months, speaking like a 6 year old by age two. She has always excelled at speech, vocabulary and reading and tested at a 12th grade level when she was 6. But everything else you mentioned, she had as a child, and many of those traits she still has and was only recently diagnosed at age 38 after decades of misdiagnosis. She has a genius IQ as I suspect you also have. My nephew is 32 and autistic and also a genius IQ. The mind is a fascinating, yet often, frustrating thing to comprehend. Your videos are helping me, as a parent, learn things about my daughter that I never understood before. Thank you. So many people think autism is a male thing and it’s not, it just presents differently in boys who are more likely to have it so the girls go misunderstood.
I relate to literally every single one of your points. Thanks so much for this video! I’m in the early stages of research and gathering information for my official evaluation without any family members, unfortunately. So I’m trying to pool all the early traits I had from childhood, and your video has been the closest to my experience. It’s triggered a flood of memories, and I’ve been able to endlessly list examples based on your points alone. I greatly appreciate you for creating such helpful content. I’m a new subscriber! Thanks, again.
Thank you for sharing your journey! Great job on the videos I've seen so far. I look forward to more. While I have never been diagnosed, I feel like I could be...my experience with examples are: I had speech therapy for my struggle with saying words that started with an S. I think if I recall that it was kindergarten or first grade. When I get tired beyond my capacity or overwhelmed, I can't form sentences properly or say things wrong. My mind will go blank. I definitely need alone time to decompress from large crowds, events and parties with family/friends. I get noticeably agitated and extremely overwhelmed and you can tell with my tone when I'm overwhelmed. Noise affects me when I'm extremely overwhelmed. I can't do small talk. I am terrible with eye contact. It's very awkward, but I try extremely hard to stay engaged when I need to. My emotions from my family's perspective could be seen as very flat. I don't get excited about things that one should. However, contrary to their belief, I do have an extreme interest in landscape/nature photography, poetry, pathology and tornadoes. I get hyper excited and stop whatever I'm doing to take the photograph. I'm a literal person and am loyal to what one literally says. It can be seen as obedient almost or I need things explained if I don't understand the statement or request. 🫠 I obsess over holographic and pastel colors. Anyway I hope everyone has a safe space they can be however they need to for their growth and authenticity. You aren't alone whether you're diagnosed or not. You matter as a human. 🌞
I was about 98% just like you as a child and still living with similar. I have never been diagnosed, quite frequently think people hate me or are laughing at me. You so remind me of me.. always the quiet one sitting in the background taking all the details in, not sharing your thoughts. I was called shy, but I really don't think that was it at all. Thank you for sharing about yourself. I was fortunate to have a horse for about three years of my life from 12-14 ish and loved it, such a bond between myself and animals.
My daughter has 8 out of 9 traits. She is actually not shy at all. I keep getting told she is social so that disqualies her and it is a behavioral issue. Thank you for your video. She is 4 and about to start preschool. You are amazing!!
Hi Diana, thank you so much for watching my video! Being social is absolutely NOT a disqualifying factor, and if a doctor tells you that, they do not understand who Autism presents itself in girls. I'd recommend checking out the channel Chloe Hayden (Princess Aspien). She is Autistic and is the most high-energy, social person I've ever seen. Best of luck to your daughter. She is awesome and can do anything she puts her mind to!
My speech was extremely early and very clear. I think it's because it was an intense interest. By age 2 I could already correctly pronounce complicated words. I was very shy with strangers, had very few friends, but I was extremely attached to them. I didn't know how to interact with other kids that weren't them. I didn't have that many sensory issues, probably because I lived in a very small village that was very quiet. Kindergarten and primary school were in a small town, too. Later I needed music to deal with the time on the bus. I hate certain strong smells like fish, they still make me physically sick. I'm quite flexible, but if things don't go as they were in the plan in my head, I just can't function. It's like my whole world breaks down. My intense interests were books and language (I was very particular about spelling and stuff). I always prepare the night before because it takes me too long to pick clothes in the morning. I needed things a certain way, that's for sure. I can't think of an example, but with certain toys I wouldn't let anyone else play with MY toys. That was very important
Oh my God!! The picking out clothes thing!! My daughter is 17 now and is much better about our but it's still a nightmare if her outfit isn't prepared for school the next day. I've never heard that from anyone else but I knew it was part of her Autism. Thank you for sharing btw. ❤ My daughter was diagnosed late too and I feel like people don't believe me so I'm going to be sharing these!
I just got my daughter's diagnosis for autism today. Thanks for the information. She has had major gut issues since she was a baby so that really stuck out for me!
Your are amazing Olivia! 🦋 I had all of your Traits in a different ways so and my 2 daughters.....our Traits is very similar with some variations! Thanks to share about your Mild Spectrum! You doing a amazing job, and you helping to save the World! Soon our planet is gonna be emerge in ART, Creativity & Resilence! And you are parte of this! LOVE, PEACE & FREEDOM! 💗❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
I've always had a horse obsession, but I have to admit I also liked model cars with shiney wheels and loved to spin the wheels and watch them spin for hours.
When I was a kid I was OBSESSED with whales. I could tell you every type, how much they weighed, the length, life expectancy, location of the oceans, what they feed on, etc. I grew out of that. I also loved all my pets and treated them like humans. I would bring animals, snakes, turtles, etc in the home and my mom would constantly have to be telling me that I could not do that. I treated all animals like they were humans and I still treat all animals with much more respect than the average person. I also loved reading and drawing. I had difficulty with deciding what to wear as well and when I was a teen I typically went to the mall and chose whatever outfit was on the manikin. I was also incredibly shy!
Thank you from my heart for making these videos. It’s like you’re talking about my daughter but with a few small differences. It’s mind blowing. Thank you.
I am on the spectrum with few traits.. but this is my youngest daughter. 110% . She is 3 yrs old & autistic as well She is the center of our household. The warm sunshiny light of our lives. She's bossy! Doesnt wear pants (takes them off Hates tight clothing) She eats veggies like crazy ! but doesn't eat meat ..she'll put it to her mouth, but it goes right back on to the plate. She likes her alone time. She has her meltdowns (sometimes not just tantrums, but due to over stimulation, overwhelming & sensory issues) . She also has gut issues..Constipation is very common regardless of her eating veggies. (Meal replacement & protein breakfast shakes have been a life saver for low iron & help get her somewhat regular.) She also has trouble making decisions. she has a lot of trouble choosing what to watch or drink.. Pretty much this entire video sums up our little sweetheart❤🧡💛
I'm an older autistic woman who was diagnosed a few years ago in late middle age. Unlike Olivia, I did not have delayed speech, quite the opposite. My parents and grandmother sa id that I said my first word when I was nine months old, and within the next two months progressed to full sentences. My mother added that I never shut up after that, whiich is a *bit* of an exaggeration, but not by much. After my diagnosis, one of my doctors told me that this is called being hyperverbal, and is also a fairly commom autistic trait. This video series is interesting, and fun to watch!
![Stromae, Pomme - “Ma Meilleure Ennemie” (from Arcane Season 2) [Official Visualizer]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/1F3OGIFnW1k/mqdefault.jpg)
I remember that I loved being alone as a child. Yes, I did play with others but I had no problem being alone for hours. I actually needed this and still do
Same. I actually realized I don't want a bf and every single reason why. Makes me wonder why I ever thought I needed one not that long ago. They don't complete me, they misunderstand, complicate, and cause me to lose track of the things I really want to do, since I easily sacrifice myself. Also, I mask so bad, I don't think it's healthy for me when I also am naive about a person's ethic and morality and what kind of person they really are. So bad combo. Plus the need for alone time is not a choice, and yet it causes all sorts of distrust and guilt shaming. It's not like I do the same things a guy does when they are having alone time🙄😔
I would sneak out of my room early in the morning during sleepovers and go hide in my parents room so I could get away from my friend for as long as possible until they woke up. LOL!
@@OliviaHops exactly why my fav game was hide and seek. I got so good at it after an hour I'd climb out of the spot and declare my victory.... But i didn't mind waiting extra long to come out.
Since receiving my co-diagnoses of ADHD and autism, specially re: autism, my wife now understands and accepts why I'm pretty solitary (few, very close friends) and okay with that.
My mum always says that my siblings are the weird ones because they can’t play alone, but I have always been able to. Now I’m starting to think I’m the weird one
Olivia, you have no idea how much relief your videos give me. My daughter is 3 and I am seeing literally all of these traits in her. My dearest hope is that she ends up being a happy adult.
Yes ! Great video. & I absolutely understand your hopes for her adulthood. My youngest daughter turned 3 in August. She is autistic & does almost all of these traits❤🧡💛 She's content in her ways & is overall very happy . Wouldn't have her any other way
from a autistic lady (me) she'll be fine I promise you. I wish I could go back in time and hug the little me that thought everything was going to fail for me and ended up with success. I wish could tell little me that things are going to be amazing.
My daughter was diagnosed The age of 2. She is now 12 and I am still trying to understand and navigate the world of ASD.. getting diagnosed early was a blessing. She started speech at the age of 2 and Behavioral therapy and started school for special needs and obviously still in special needs school today. That part been a blessing. My daughter understands everything but her social skills are not great. She cant have a conversation with me or anyone . She can speak but it's all scripting . Everything she watches on video or hears she remembers and scripts all day long .. I feel sad everyday . My daughter is happy that's what keeps me going ....
With your help, patience and understanding , she will ♥️
How is she doing now? My daughter is 3 at the moment and it's very hard.
Making decisions is always very difficult 😥. Being on a schedule is quite necessary. Gut issues always. Thank you Olivia. You are so brave.
Thanks so much for watching my video, Suzanne!! It means so much to me!
I haven't watched this video yet and I already agree with your comment! I'm terrible with decisions, don't give me choices just assign them😫😩 And I have a planner that I take with me everywhere, and I cross every single thing out from sunrise to sunset, from brushing my teeth to reading exactly six chapters in a book I'm reading at night. The struggle is real!
@@OliviaHops Why do you talk so fast?,jesus christ slow down it's not a race.
@@OliviaHops What is wrong with you?
You talk like as if you are on drugs.
@@masonnix9566 Don't be rude. If she talks too fast for you read the subtitles or don't watch it the video
The “sitting and taking things in” is something I can definitely relate to. As a teenager, I remember that when I would meet new people, particularly in groups, I would just sit by myself watching and listening. It would need to do this many times before feeling like I “understood” them enough to assimilate into their group. It worked well for me at the time. I was a very attractive young women and my friend groups were always made up of guys, so they never seemed to care much when I wasn’t talking. They were just happy to have a pretty girl around! 😄
So so relatable
I still experience difficulties decision making and im 25 years old with 2 kids 🙃🙃🙃 you are not alone girl!!
Between my daughter and me, I feel like we display all of these traits... we haven’t been diagnosed, but I started to suspect we might be on the spectrum when I was noticing a-typical behavior in my daughter. Started watching videos for her benefit and have found that I struggle with sensory issues (light, noise, bedding, clothing). I get super interested in topics (literally losing sleep over wanting to learn more) and become an expert and then get bummed that there’s no more to learn about that topic. Super meticulous about lots of tasks. Too exhausting to keep more than a couple close friends. I can read emotions well and am empathetic, but I react to and interpret unexpected sarcasm literally. Even if I know a person is joking, my first instinct is to take everything literally which makes me feel silly sometimes. Don’t you dare cover my nostril while kissing or I feel like I will suffocate. Same if the air in a room or car is too warm. My husband enjoys surprises and I do not. I want to know what’s coming - even if it’s a good thing! Probably amongst other things that I chalked up to me just being different.
I was shy and a bookworm.
There is a autism herbal recommendations I got about dr Oyalo and his herbal remedy has work perfectly on my sons improvements in speech and social skill and my son fine till now
Man, while I don't relate to delayed speech, that whole "taking everything in... feeding the computer" thing hits. When my friends introduce me to a new game, I want to sit and watch them play it, and have the chance to take in information about the basics before I ever get a controller in my hands. Trying to adjust to a new game while also having to make decisions in real-time is information overload and I don't much like it. Not to say I can't try out new games on my own, but I much prefer to watch if it's an active or FPS game.
yes I want to know what the rules are, and the goal before I participate. Then slowly try game with another person teaching me, and then trying myself
Yeah, I don't think I had delayed speech either. In fact, according to my mom, I could read the license plate on my dad's dirt bike from a VERY early age before I properly learned how to read. That's more of an excel in speech development to me.
I didn't have delayed speech but, I did have a big problem with selective mutism. Oh and I still was put into speech class twice. I was also voted the most shyest person at the school.
I hate learning a new fone. No one to watch first. 😏
Fk damn! I feel seen! 😄
I absolutely love the Assassin's Creed franchise and FarCry, but I avoided games like that for years, even told myself I didn't like them. Then I watched my (then new) partner play through them and felt much more confident in knowing what I was doing.
I've since played nearly every title (working on the rest) and love it! I just needed to SEE how to play games like that first...
I recently realized I had so many meltdowns as a kid. I remember crying and going to my parents for help but when they asked me what was wrong I didnt know what was wrong. Existence just got really painful for seemingly no reason. And even if I did know what was wrong, I couldnt actually speak to tell them. The only word I could say when melting down was mom, which didnt really help.
I have a few memories as a child of throwing a fit and just yelling "I WANT TO GO HOME!" even if I already was home, lol. Didn't know why I was upset, or also couldn't describe why.
This reminds me of myself. Every single day in school if someone even looked at me the wrong way I’d break down crying and screaming, and then when asked why I’d say “I don’t know” or “it’s stupid.” My mom got me to go to the school counselor and all he did was tell me not to cry. Now I repress my feelings and cry when I try to tell people how I feel. I don’t know how nobody expected autism. I think there was so much focus on my diagnosed adhd sister, that since I still got good grades (she didnt) there couldn’t be anything wrong with me. It’s baffling
❤
Yes. Existence was really painful. My experience of childhood as well.
I was like this. I would cry and my mom would say if u r going to cry I will give you some thing to cry about. I stopped cry. Now I just get 😡
I can't take my daughter to the toy store and tell her to pick out what you want. She'll wander the store forever.
Me when I get off work and haven't eaten for 6-8 hours inside the grocery store at 1 am just slowly eyeballing every item expecting it to pop off the shelf and say" Here I am. You found me. Let's go fix your grumbling tummy." I mean I guess that's what I'm expecting. But then I see another human eventually and I realize how weird I am and I force myself to make executive decisions and get out of there. It's only been 45 minutes...
OMG! This was me!! When I was young, my aunt once took me shopping to pick something out as my birthday present and I made her go to several stores and still couldn't choose something. Lol.
@@OliviaHops Lol. That's my daughter exactly. Even still frequently and she's 23.
Hahaha I do that to I'm not autistic though!
@@OliviaHops same here
I'm glad you pointed out that boys can present in the same way girls. As a guy, I didn't have the more stereotypical male traits and several of the traits you describe I recognize in myself based on what I can remember and what my parents have told me. Just goes to show that, as you said, everyone on the spectrum is different and not all of us fit in clear cut categories.
Thanks Olivia!
I have extra long intestines have u ever had a ultra sound or colonoscopy? I take 40 fiber pillsa day ndrink 5 waters cheese anddairy isnot your friend or bread sory kid..
There is a autism herbal recommendations I got about dr Oyalo and his herbal remedy has work perfectly on my sons improvements in speech and social skill and my son fine till now
I was super interested in horses for many years as a child. I drew horses, read about horses, pretended to have horses, pretended to be a horse, all the time. I did play with other children at school, but most of my horse stuff was just me by myself. I also struggled with decisions, still do.
My dear you have changed my world. I am 66 years old never diagnosed but I knew/know that I was/am "different". So many of the traits you mentioned I had/have As a young adult I asked my mom if she was ever told that I was slow. My perception of life is different than everyone I know, while in most cases it has turned out that I was spot on, my process of facts are was different. Thanks to you I am going to investigate and address this further, LOL sound familiar. Thank you love.
I think they might have thought something was wrong at school. I was very shy and I could read almost as soon as they taught me the letters. I was reading my sister's school books for pleasure. They were six and ten years older than I.
You're literally telling my story. Thank you.
Thank you so much for watching, Nikki!
Your honesty and self-revelation (and self-celebration) is a real gift to other young women. BRAVO Olivia!!
Not just young women! I am 60 and you are helping me understand so much about myself. Thank you, Olivia!
I am an older woman. The freedom that you have instilled in me by explaining your personality traits, so identical to mine, and the acceptance of self, are precious. Thank you so much. You have made a huge difference in my life. I wish I had known these things years ago, but to know them now brings lots of peace.
I am a teacher and interact with autistic children, this helps me very much. My niece is autistic, this helps me understand her more. You are amazing. I am going to watch more of your videos, thanks for sharing your life experiences. God Bless!
This hit too close to home but I'm grateful you made this. My childhood sucked because no one was patient enough to understand me. I tried so hard to be "normal" most of my life and it was miserable.
#1: I also had delayed speech. Strange thing about me was when I did start talking, it was perfect. People would ask me to say complex words and I almost always pronounced them correctly.
#2: I was also very shy. And well... I still am haha. As far as separation anxiety, there was a time I remember holding on to the porch rail so tight my mom actually couldn’t get me off of it to put me on the school bus. I was screaming and crying, wrapped around a post, pretty much immovable. I hated school all the way up through high school.
#3: I pretty much had one friend through 4th grade and I liked the teachers more than I liked the kids my age. And my teachers liked me. But I moved from the country to the city after 4th grade, they were NOT my kind of people. I felt the teachers were no more mature than the children in my classes. And yeah, I had little interest in people... again I’m still that way. I have a girlfriend. She’s the only person I take a true, undying interest in.
#4: I was an EXTREMELY picky eater. I would eat 3-4 peanut butter sandwiches a day for several years, partially out of routine. I can’t eat bitter things, I will spit out dark chocolate to this day. Textures are extremely important, I wouldn’t and still can’t let food touch, especially if it’s something with juice, like green beans, next to mashed potatoes. Nasty. Smells have always been a huge problem for me. My grandmother was making sourkraut one time and I couldn’t go in the house. Going down the detergent isle in the store still gives me a headache. Sound didn’t start bothering me till around high school. As far as clothing goes, I could wear most things, but I had a lot of trouble wearing something I hadn’t worn before, especially shoes.
#5: Yep... I am completely inflexible. Routine wasn’t as big a deal when I was younger that I can remember, but that’s because I didn’t have a whole lot to put into a routine. Now that I’m working, breaks in routine completely throw me off. If we have a late start to the day, I’m actually worse off than if we did our regular 7:30 start to the work day. I work in construction, so honestly at this point, I’m so exhausted and deep into burnout that I don’t really have the capacity to actually freak out about smaller breaks in routine. However as someone on the spectrum, I just stared driving last week (I’m 23) and I’m definitely still capable of feeling the stress and anxiety from that haha.
#6: I’ve had many special interests. And I’ll be honest, #1 is firearms, or as they’re better known to most people; guns XD Any time I see one, I can usually tell you what it is and what ammunition it fires. If you handed it to me, I could operate it as if I owned and was trained on it within a minute or two. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s no different from trains and the like. It’s a machine. The difference is, it’s small and simple. As an American, I’m lucky enough to be able to own them, so it’s something I can get my hands on and take apart, put back together, learn every piece and what it’s function is and so on. Firearms have a set of physics behind them that really fascinates me. Other special interests include music and... well now I’ve got a bunch of smaller ones that I can’t pick from to mention. Which brings us to...
#7: Yeah no, I couldn’t and still can’t make decisions. I have very few opinions. If there’s not a logical reason to choose one thing over another, I can’t make the decision. Or if they have a very similar number of pros and cons, I’ll never make a solid decision.
#8: This was less the case as a kid I think, I don’t really remember, but now it is definitely the case. Being someone that’s kinda hyper logical, my brain expends a lot of time and effort figuring out what the best way for something to go is, and if someone changes that, I’m not very happy, even if I don’t show it. There are a lot of people I just can’t work with and do things with, because my decisions are always questioned or changed, and I can’t handle that. It’s one of the biggest things that causes me to stim and start feeling like I need to be alone or I’m going to have a meltdown.
#9: DEFINITELY had and have stomach issues. Now that I’m more in control and have an eating routine, same things, same time, every day aside from weekends, it’s a lot better. But apparently all my life, all the way back to being a baby, I wouldn’t eat because it hurt my stomach. I had the other problem. In 8th grade, my mom had to pick me up from school almost every other day for months because I would have stomach pain that would actually paralyze me. My muscles were so tense from it that they wouldn’t respond to my will to stand. Of course by the time I got home, that ended in me staying in the restroom a while. Not fun, especially for someone prone to sensory issues haha.
I had to do this and hit on every point, because I relate so well. Im not actually diagnosed, and I don’t think I really want to be. I’m self diagnosed, and there are enough resources such as yourself that I can learn from and improve my life with that I don’t need to put it on my record. Unfortunately it can cause me to be dismissed from many things. But anyway, thank you for making these videos! They are very helpful. Keep up the good work.
Wow, that ended up long lol.
I relate to the school thing soooo much !! Really hated it ,was so shy shy had separation anxiety also ..have memories of crying etc
?
What kind of grades did you get? Did you have to have tutors?
@@toiwright6837 my grades were all A’s for as long as I was in a small town school. I was able to get the attention I needed and I was kept on track. I was officially diagnosed with ADD, however I now know through my own research, that doesn’t cover the entirety of my condition.
I did have tudors. As long as they knew me and understood how I learned, I did really well with them. However by high school, I was failing every class, and I was so mentally burnt out that I didn’t care. I wore a leather jacket and sunglasses to be sure people avoided me as much as I avoided them so that I could get through the days. There were no good tudors to go to at that time either.
So yeah, that’s the “short” answer haha.
My daughter sounds exactly like you. We sort of self diagnosed her ourselves recently (age 23). Her interest is in pets! Our dog was a therapy dog for her.
Ditto me too exactly all that....
The same here! Animals are my fascination and my deep love.
I loooove my dog so much. I feel more connected with animals. Not so with humans.
Feels like you just described my childhood 😅
I hate making decisions. Especially picking a restaurant or what to eat. Didn't know this was also an autistic trait! I got diagnosed about a month ago and still learning so much :)
Yes, picking a restaurant is the WORST!! It can cause me to have a meltdown. Anyways, thanks so much for watching, Hanna! And congrats on your diagnosis!!
@@OliviaHops Haha thanks! I'm so happy I got my diagnosis, my whole life makes sense now :)
I relate a lot to your experience! I also didn’t tolerate loud places, noises, storm or new year made me cry and sometimes it still does. I didn’t like being hugged as a toddler and child. And I still don’t like it. I enjoyed my own company and didn’t care much about my peers. My interests were more like boys stereotypical- trams and magnets but not only there were also dolls. I didn’t play in roles I just created and set up a scene to watch it for hours. I was very shy and curious but I held questions back. I tried my best to figure things out on my own. I was a picky eater for some time, but I come from poverty so often there was no food at home or one thing only and no choice. But one thing makes me wonder - my flexibility. I’ve learned that to some point but as a child I didn’t tolerate changes. Now maybe it’s just my experience that I always have in mind that people generally don’t keep their word or don’t remember what they said. So I always have plan B
Your mom sounds incredible, and she seems like a strong support system! Would you ever do an interview with her to get her perspective on what it was like and any recommendations she has for parenting a child, more specifically a little girl, who has autism?
I am 54 and I have always sensed that I was different. I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was in my 20s so I thought that maybe that was why I felt that way but I wasn't sure. Recently I started watching videos about people with autism and there are things I relate to. Some things I have learned to stop doing so much. I used to be very inappropriate. Once and a while I can still be. I was very shy. I have never had a best friend in my life. I always believed people were talking about me in school. I have trouble socializing with people I don't know. If I am put on the spot I sometimes go blank and can't figure out what to say. This is just some of the traits I relate to.
What advice would you have for us boyfriends or husbands with an autistic girl in our lives?
Update: Never mind. I just found your video on autism and romantic relationships.
its so hard to describe how horrible and painful my childhood was. i still am not over it.
That was a very interesting video. I have a diagnosis of Asperger Syndrome, and while I can definitely identify with some of the "classic" traits of Autism more associated with males, like you, I also have developed strong masking skills, and most people are surprised when I tell them I am on the spectrum. I credit a lot of this with watching a lot of TV shows and movies and imitating the way I see the characters interact on screen. I actually came to enjoy playing different "characters", (to a point).
When I was a child though, my traits were much more obvious. I had pretty much every trait you mention, except I don't think I had delayed speech or gut issues. My mom has told me people thought I was like a "little old man", and I often got along better with adults than my peers. In my case though, I don't remember ever being disinterested in my peers. I was always desperate to make friends, but other kids often made fun of, rejected, and/or took advantage of me, and because of my difficulty with social cues, it was often difficult for me to determine if someone was making fun of me, leading to significant social anxiety. I definitely could (and did) entertain myself with solitary activities, but I don't remember ever passing up an opportunity to play with peers.
I have always had obsessive and narrow interests, but they have shifted over time. Vacuum cleaners were my biggest obsession when I was little, but I've also been obsessively interested in music (particularly music artists), cars, history, languages, genealogy, and houses. (Old houses are definitely my biggest obsession).
By the time I got to be high school age I was more self-aware, and I learned to mask well enough to get along with most of my peers, but it was always a struggle. Like you, I also jumped back and forth between groups of friends. The fact that I enjoy playing different "characters" played a big part in this. I also always loved talking in different accents, and I even came up with names for some of these "alter-egos".
Thanks for sharing...interesting to read and see your growth..Good luck to u ☘ I relate to wanting to have more friends too etc...had a few but nevwr felt totsmly close to ppl
Sir do u have sensory issues..how to deal wit it
Just diagnosed in 2022 at age 37. Painfully shy as a kid to the point that I literally cried and hid behind my mom if strangers talked to me. My mom also walked me to the restroom in public places until I was probably 13. I HATED clothes (still true lol). Dinosaurs were my special interest but girls weren’t supposed to like them 🙄
Thank you for these videos. I’m having a hard time right now with umm everything so relatable content is a small moment of relief.
I'm still shy. Separation anxiety. I prefer 1 on 1 time with any friends. It's hard for me to socially show that I care about them, and I get overwhelmed if they all want to talk to me often. Sensations have to be in my comfort zone. I haaaaate jeans. I can't handle the feeling of any cloth on my shoulders or arms unless it's extremely cold.
I still need naps 😅
I emotionally feel like I want to cry when I don't have the food I want.
I get really into my hobbies.
I still can't make decisions ☹
I tend to pick an outfit and stick to it as my most comfortable outfit. Wish I could simply wear it every day. The idea of having a whole wardrobe for going into work sounds so stressful.
I had constipation as a kid. Now it's diarrhea if anything at all is off. Having regular poop is so rare 😔
Aaaah I'm crying again! You're describing my daughter almost to a T!
I'm so terrified that she's not going to have the same opportunities as other adults, but seeing you the way you are is giving me a lot of confidence and hope for her.
Put good things in her head & raise her up, that's the best thing you can do.
Introverts and creative people which is autistic people can get people far because they are intelligent as fuck and can focus more than others on getting educated
Dude. The gut issues. My son is going for an evaluation soon. He’s most likely ASD. he is at the point of making his own language. I love these videos. You are helping me so much. I’m thinking I’m on the spectrum too but I’m afraid to get tested. You’re so brave. I can’t thank you enough
Thank you, Olivia! You have helped me learn so much. I play imaginary "characters" with my granddaughter on the floor. She absolutely LOVES our one on one time together. She is very controlling when it comes to our playtime. She makes all the rules and I must comply 😀. She pretty much controls the whole playtime. Telling me who I "can be", what I can say, what "the story is", what to pretend, what I can touch, or not. She has most of the traits you describe. I love this child more than anything in the world and want to help make her childhood and future life positive. She has been a huge blessing to me. I wish you would do a question and answer type forum. I would pay for a subscription if it were offered by you.
Thanks so much for this sweet comment, Julie! And for watching my video. I'm honored it could help you learn something. Your granddaughter sounds very similar to how I was with my imaginative play. I still have imaginary characters that's I've "known" since I was 11. Your granddaughter is awesome and she can do anything she puts her mind to. Thank you for watching over her and wanting to make sure she has a great future. God Bless both of you! And I'll definitely look up how to do a question and answer forum/video. Thanks for the idea!
I’ve never been diagnosed, but I became very interested in researching autism in 2010 when my then-two-year-old nonverbal grandson was diagnosed as severely autistic, at the low-functioning end of the spectrum. The more I read and watched about the subject, the more convinced I became that I may well be a high-functioning autistic. Watching this video, I felt you could have been telling my story, except that I began speaking quite early but didn’t walk until much later. I’ve never heard of anyone, male or female, with as many similarities before, particularly the difficulty in decision-making, the intensity with which I, even now, still approach every new interest, and the lackadaisical approach to associating with friends. I also have been aware, even prior to beginning to research my grandchild’s condition, that I’ve always, since my earliest childhood memories, been very uncomfortable looking anyone in the eyes. Anyway, I appreciate your candid synopsis and have, just now, subscribed to your channel. Thank you.
Both my children were painfully shy and had severe separation anxiety as pre-schoolers and early elementary school. I always felt their teachers were so judgmental of me and assumed their behavior was caused by my overprinting/"helicopter parenting". I wish teachers would educate themselves about early signs of ASD. One of my children would scream at other children when they approached to play at the park. I didn't know what to make of it at the time, but the disinterest in other children persisted for years.
Difficulty making decisions is also called "Choice Paralysis" and it's very common in both ADHD and Autistic peeps!
I annoy myself with that! xD
Thank you Olivia. My mom said at the end of the school year my kindergarten teacher confessed to my mom that I cried everyday at school. When she finally asked me why I said because the bus was too loud and it smelled bad. This was 36 or 37 years ago and I still remember.
Yes I get decision paralysis so badly! It is very common to experience with ASD/ADHD! I am the worst person to ask last minute where to eat 😂
I just wanted to thank you. I've always thought I was just weird but your videos made me realize I'm autistic. I've gone through almost the same things as you. And I still cant make decisions and I'm 35. I feel like a child. I'm codependent really bad. I dont know what to do to get help and I dont have anyone to help me. And I definitely cant afford medical. I feel lost because I cant be normal and everyone avoids me. Thank you for your videos tho. Your helping realize I'm not just weird, theres a reason to my madness. ♥️
This is so crazy !!! This sounds exactly like my 18 year old daughter when she younger !! Thank you for doing this video !
Thanks so much for watching!!
My daughter didn't do sleepovers (and even now she's 18 she doesn't like parties). She has good friends, but they are all kept at a bit of a distance. Also struggles to make decisions - MUCH prefers someone else to make decisions for her. Routine very important!
I am a teacher of 25yrs. Thank you for sharing these traits as it helps me understand and build better relationships with my students.
This video was EXTREMELY helpful to me as a mother of an autistic 3 year old. I’m filled with so much hope and joy for my daughter’s future. Thank you for lifting this mama’s worries off of her shoulders! God bless!
BOSSY! Yup that's also our daughter. My husband got her a tshirt that she wears with pride. It says "I'm not bossy! I just have great leadership skills" :-)
I was the oldest child and was extremely bossy. My poor brother and sister!
omg I love horses so darn much I have them all over my room like on my bed on my walls like ALOT
I sometimes faint in crowds. Total overwhelm. Sensory issues: yup. Love my alone time. Maybe, hmmm. I’m 50 now so it certainly could’ve been missed. I always was super sensitive and cried easily. Get obsessive about things. I do prefer a combo routine of structure & variety. Am highly psychic. Anyone know how to get tested as an adult? Mostly just…curious. 😀
Yes I’m 55 and just diagnosed. I have similar traits to yours. I would scream and cry at those nature videos and the images would haunt me and replay in my head to the point it gave me anxiety and I couldn’t sleep thinking of the poor baby antílope that was killed and eaten by the lion. 🥺 That sensitivity sort of crosses into intuitive/psychic senses.
I have heard the testing can be expensive. Luckily my insurance covered 100%. If you have insurance for “mental health” (I hate that term) then you have to find someone that does the testing. It’s a specialty sort of thing. Then you do the testing. For me that was an interview, answering 6 pages of questions, more interviews, some A.D.D test I think was called a TOVA test, and a series of puzzles and more questions/interview with another specialist that judged me on my answers and if my feet were constantly fidgeting, choice of words for the answers, etc. I want to say the process was a month or so.
I had church people come to visit uninvited when I was in my pajamas. My spouse let them in. We made small take and then I heard me say u need to get out. They looked shocked. I said again. U were not invited u need to leave. And they left. I felt bad for a while and not being welcoming then I felt ok about it. Still do. But it was visually I could not stand them one more minute
Omg..I have an 11 year old super awesome girl with every. Single. Trait. You. Listed. I know this sounds so weird but for the longest time I was oblivious to the difference in her behavior vs her peers etc. When people started telling me that they saw traits 9 years ago I thought THEY we're wrong. I started thinking that it was MY FAULT and I don't won't my daughter to get bullied etc. I've finally found an amazing Dr that's helping us do thesurveysvwith her teachers about what they notice. But then I realized that autism, asbergers and ADHD are in the same "family" and low and behold I was diagnosed with ADHD 8 YEARS AGO. my daughter is obcessed with dragons, mythology and techno music. I was watching you talk and I thought omg I never would have known and you're so brilliant and awesome. But even though we have the ball rolling for an official diagnosis, I truly need it only to help with schoolwork and mainly math. Otherwise, I can't imagine having it any other way and I always tell her that's being different is a gift. I'm so happy I found your channel. Ugh I wanna cry. Ty so much for doing this you have no idea how much you've helped me. Oh btw see the ADHD in my comment/writing style? Lol! Love from Louisiana
What was your daughter like at 4-5 and how has she changed by 11?
THIS ^^^ yes, ALL of this describes me as a child too, other playmates were very cruel while I was growing up, I also had an older brother that drove me absolutely insane lol, playmates saying I did not have a right to be into horses as much as I was because I did not know how to ride one, I always fell off and was quite nervous having to get on one, but I loved loved loved being around them, the smell of them lol yes i know weird and talking to them, and brushing their coat, like having a close friend sort to speak. I enjoy being alone too and have to tell my family i need a set amount of time to be by myself without interruptions, or else i too have amajor 2 yr old melt down, and i am 51 yrs old, I'm such a terrible peron and i wish i could be better and normal. my kids and petsand everybody in my life deserve a better mom, friend, wife, ect. I have too many unfinished craft projects too and here I am watching videos
Hi Olivia, my daughter is 19, and I guess I always felt that she was different in her own little ways when she was little. But listening to your videos I now believe that she has had autism this whole time. Of course I can diagnose her myself but she has always had her corky ways, facial expressions and melt downs and alot more. Thank u for posting you videos. I have learned alot.
Olivia, thanks for your videos. I can understand myself like never before thanks to you. When I watched your first video I started to wonder if I were autistic. And I am. You have literally CHANGED MY LIFE
LOVE YOU 💕🌱
Wow! Maria, this comment means the world to me. Thank you so much for sharing that I could help you understand yourself better. I'm honored. That is my main goal, so I'm so excited to hear they could help you. God Bless!!
Difficulty Making Decisions: On the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, the clearest trait for me is Intuitive (caught up in ideas, low connection to the details of the world around me (especially time)), but the second-most clear trait is Perception. Perceptive people take in data and are good at picking up new details; Judgement people are good at sorting through data, narrowing down options, and making decisions. The extreme Perceptives (divorced from that Judgment trait) are horrible at narrowing down options. For me, it's very difficult to decide on X because it means that YZQRM are now not part of the picture, and they might be cool too! Which is why it's so hard for me to make decisions while writing, and cut out possibilities.
Another trait I've never connected with being atypical. Man, all these things that I've known about myself for a long time but am now considering through a new lens...
I have trouble making important decisions and I'm a J type
Aaaaay Myers-Briggs!
I'm an INTP
Apparently INTPs and INTJs are the most common types to be autistic.
@@karablack8336 I am INTJ, and want to tell you the percentage of each because I utterly obsessed over MBTI for about 10 years, and my daughter told me a few months ago she thinks I'm Autistic. I'm 52 years old and already figured out on my own that I am depressed, ADHD, dyscalculic and dyslexic and severely gluten intolerant. Kind of getting sick of labels.
There are alot of similarities between you and myself as a child. I was also obsessed with horses (now it's cats ) as a child and used to ride all the time. I also had a gender identity problem and thought that girls were sissies. Naturally, I was a tomboy. Back in my day, they knew little about autism and I was diagnosed really late.
I used to change my outfits 3-4 times a day. I didn’t feel confortable in anything.
But I learned to speak and walk quite early. The first being I had conversations with, was our cat, in a weird language I made up. I didn’t talk to humans at first.
Olivia, thank you sooo much for your videos! I am 51 years old and just now realizing that I am autistic. Everything you talk about I'm sitting here going YEESSSS that's me! Thanks to you I'm trying to make a list to take to my new doctor so that we can talk about getting me tested. All my life I just thought I was crazy but I see now that's not the case. Again thank you for all you do to help everyone on the spectrum. Much love.
Hey, L! Thank you so much for watching my video and for sharing this awesome comment with me! I'm so excited my video could help you. That's my goal when I make them! You're awesome, and I wish you the best of luck on your diagnosis journey!
My 15 year old was just diagnosed with ASD, your diagnosis came even later. My kid had every one of these traits that you mention and was flagged early for speech therapy and physical therapy, but never for ASD. I feel like there are a lot of undiagnosed cases out there!
Yes like my daughter for example I keep asking for her to get tested but never get the recommendations. She is 8 and has the comprehension of a 3 year old.... She is speech therapy through the doctor and her school but I still can't get the recommendation needed.... Is it because I'm in the state of CA? Seems like the Doctors out here not trying to hear my concerns.....
I have never been diagnosed, but highly suspect I may have some form of Autism. I'm old, really old. And I didn't really "get things" maybe all adults should know. Like if someone died, I know to say I'm sorry. But the deeper thoughts, my brain never went there. I was called "Spacy Stacy" in Highschool. Cute name, but it was everybit true!
I never thought to ask about the other person, maybe at that age I "didn't" care. I know I do now!
Since recovering from an Opiate Addiction, I have remained sober for over 7 years. I have not had one "SINGLE THOUGHT" OF TAKING ANY EXTRA FOR A HIGH OR EUPHORIC FEELING. I HAVE HAD 3 MAJOR SURGERIES, I WAS SCARED TO TAKE THEM. I THOUGHT SOMETHING WOULD MAKE ME WANT MORE LIKE IT ALWAYS HAD BEFORE, BUT IT DIDN'T. I TOOK THEM AS NEEDED (WHAT A CONCEPT) I CAN SAY THAT'S DONE!!!
I'M NOT THAT PERSON ANY LONGER.....
I am free, present, accountable, and humbled.
Thank You?
Whenever someone tells me that someone has died, I start laughing. People think I'm morbid.
Congrats on being sober for 7 years, Stacy. That's incredible! You should be SO proud of yourself! And I can relate to the someone dying thing. It's hard for me to find empathy even though I try.
So AWESOME for taking the time to say something. Would it matter if I continue to go undiagnosed officially?? Or is there a reason I should seek treatment. My birthdate says I am 49 and will be 50 on June 21st. I say I am not older than 35 in my brain!
Light and love from God Above!
& Me too!
My daughter is like that with animals to especially cats.
This sounds to the “t” like my 3 year old daughter. Thank you for speaking out ❤️ we are getting her evaluated this summer so that I know the best ways to help her
the vaccines aren't helping, unfortunately.
@@Shayne_T Ignorant and incorrect!
My daughter diagnosed with Asperger's 2021. Literally as you describe ! You're amazing!
Having hit puberty she has become the most defiant rude uncaring blunt individual. There is literally no explaining to her how rude and inappropriate she is . I'm trying to educate her on social skills to help her but she is adament how she is is totally ok and doesnt need my help or advice and if anyone finds her rude then they can get lost . She knows right from wrong and respect and manners but is adament that family and people she doesnt have time for dont need that respect. Its unbearable and concerned she will isolate herself .
Were you ever bullied as a child? I ask because I'm also an autistic female who was diagnosed as an adult, and I fit 8 out of 9 of your criteria. It's strange. I'm angrier at the way adults treated me than the way the other children did. Does that make any sense?
Hey Amy, thanks so much for watching my video and reaching out to me. I actually wasn't ever bullied as a kid. I had a couple instances like I'm sure everyone does at some point, but overall, I was not at all. I went to a small Christian school, so that's probably why. And what you said totally makes sense. It's interesting because Covid started right after I was diagnosed, so I haven't been around adults yet since finding out so I don't know how they'd treat me. I'm sorry they are treating you bad. That's terrible!
Kids are kids. They act the way the adults around them do. So if the adults are mistreating you, the kids will too. If the adults are compassionate, the kids will follow their example. So yes, it absolutely makes sense. When I got bullied, I went to my mother for comfort, and she said "What do you want ME to do?" meaning go away and stop bothering me. I just stared at her. How can a ten year old tell an adult "I just want you to tell me you love me, and not to pay attention to those mean boys." Even at the time, I was far more upset by her reaction than whatever the boys did. I don't even remember that.
tl;dr: You're not alone. Adult are responsible, kids aren't. They learn what they live.
@@fogweaver5633 oh god yes!!!! I have resentment over how parental figures behaved when I said I was being gossiped about..not outright bullying but girls being bitchy,being shy didn't help already and that stuff just escalated it easily ..teachers weren't helpful either
I was , and I relate to that. Specifically my pathetic family.
I was, but it bothered me more that I didn't understand why. I also asked before, but nobody would ever give me an answer. I had one bully whom I kinda miss. I changed her to a protector over a cookie I didn't like. She busted my lip and face, and my mom went nuts over it. I had to go to the dentist, and we went to the store after for a rare treat. I finally decided on the one thing I hadn't tried. The gingerbread cookie. It was cute, the story was cute.. It tasted awful. I didn't like it, but mom was a single mom, and $ was tight, so I couldn't waste it.. then the bully sat down next to me. Her lip was busted like mine, which was weird cause none of the other kids would have hurt her. So when she asked me what I was looking at and what I wanted, I gave her the cookie. To be honest, I just couldn't bear to eat it or waste it, and as I couldn't make a decision, I just gave it to her for her to decide. Lol. She actually taught me a lot.
Livi! So proud of you and the you've come so far, since (ehum) your kicking days playing football for me, not to mention your childhood. Your parents are pretty cool people. Oh and Bratt, we she's okay too! Keep helping those in need. God knows! Love you.
Aw, thanks so much for watching my video, Coach!! Football was about the only place I wasn't shy because I thought if I was, I'd get eaten alive lol. Thanks for making me feel welcomed from Day 1. Love you!
This is such a sweet exchange. Blessings to you both!🙏💕
Every time I watch one of your videos, I feel validated. This one really spoke to me. I had every single trait growing up. Thank you for these videos, they truly help make me feel more comfortable being a girl on the spectrum. ❤️
My daughter who is 6 was diagnosed at 3, but we started in home sessions at 2 because we knew something was different. She has a twin sister, which she heavily relies on in decision making. She always has to know what sister is doing before she makes a decision and it’s usually whatever her sister wants. She has about 4 of the traits you listed as well. I think in most areas having a twin has helped but in some it’s really hindered. She really depends on her sister. It’s sweet now because they are 6....who knows what the future holds.
Hi- would love to know other ways having twins plays out.
My twins are 21 now, one is diagnosed autistic. They both live independently, though the confirmed autistic one does get more help day to day in living arrangements, but when they were young they definitely relied on their twin more.
The point? Your twins will do just fine, they'll find their way, even if that is with supports. ☺️
For me, I didn't have a lot of close friends, but not because I didn't want to. In fact, I REALLY wanted to. I just wasn't socially adept enough to gain deeper friendships or be able to keep close friends. Like I had a LOT of acquaintances and people I considered friends at school, but rarely was I invited to anything when they got together outside of school and even if I was, I felt like the odd one out and not as close as everyone else. And when I managed to get close friendships, they would eventually fade away or just straight up say they didn't want to be friends with me anymore. It was often because I was "too much" as in I way overshared, info-dumped, and especially trauma-dumped in middle/high school because I didn't know what was "socially appropriate" and people just couldn't handle it after a while
You are very well spoken.
Thank you!
Loving all of your videos, they resonate so much and are very helpful! As for the "bossy" trait, I saw a quote once that said, "I'm not bossy...I'm just aggressively helpful," and I was like, YES! YES, YES YES! That's us! 😁
Hi Olivia, like you, I had the same traits, but until recently, I never had an answer for why, I only found out what my issue/condition was until late 2021, I'm now 61 and understanding myself a whole lot better, but still have the same problems.
My now 19 yr old son used to have constipation too all the time. He's gut issues are much better now. Thanks so much for your videos! I am a huge fan for yours!
Ok Olivia, thank you So very much!!! You have changed our world in such a positive way. I am deeply grateful for all you share. Our 10 year old daughter is on the autism spectrum. We are finally getting answers and any help she needs. It was you who made it really click, and motivated me to get her tested. Thank you so much!!!
Been there, done all that. You know I think maybe I am on the spectrum. Two of my children were. By the way, the gut problems...I found out what foods I was sensitive to and removed them from my diet and drank more water. Gut issues are now resolved. 🙂
so happy to see a new video, especially on a topic that is super helpful to me!! :)
So glad you liked this topic! Thanks so much for watching, Lucy! :)
Thank you for sharing about your speech delay-my daughter also had her own language! Her speech came in slowly between the ages of 3 and 5. And of course, now at 7 she’s a nonstop chatterbox.
Too funny, Sharon!! I have to say, I'm quite the chatterbox when it's on a topic of a special interest lol. Is she the same? Thanks so much for watching my video and sharing. Your daughter is awesome and can do anything she puts her mind to!
@@OliviaHops My Carolyn loves talking about everything and asking a million questions. She’s a joy but is exhausting. 😂 If you ask her what she wants to be when she grows up her answer is “I want to do everything.” Lol. We’ll see how her path unfolds, thank you for your videos because they help me support her dreams. Many, many thanks Olivia!
I am 69 and self-diagnosed. I see myself and both of my children here. I love your videos. Can't wait to view them all!
My autistic daughter (diagnosed age 13) had this EXACT same issue with food and hypoglycemia as a young child. Thank you for sharing your experience and for mentioning that others have said that this happened to them as well.
I look forward to when doctors/pediatricians are more aware that this might be an early sign of autism.
Our pediatrician certainly did not think it was unusual.
“I never wore pants”. As a British person I had to translate that in my head to US talk 🤣 But really, you have just described me in this top traits yet my doc brushed me off when I tried to talk to them
Lol I am also British and had the same initial confusion 😂
What does "pants" mean in British English?
@@alohaoy underwear, knickers, panties ect
I am 66 y/o and just learned 2 years ago that I'm an Aspie. (I know Aspie is no longer used but it's who I am.) I'm retired and glad I made it this far. I've always had gut issues, hate certain foods because of their texture, and take forever to make decisions. Since retiring, I've finally found supplements that work wonders for me and I'm as regular as clockwork. Thank you for this video and for putting yourself "out there".
Kefir, a yogurt drink, helps me with my guts.
My daughter (17) is autistic and I can confirm that she has great difficulty making decisions, even between things that she likes (so, two really good options). What I have found works best is for me to tell her the options and then I tell her which one I have chosen for her. Then she will tell me if she is okay with my choice. I don't know why it's easier for her when presented this way, but it is!
My grand daughter was being given 2 options for nearly everything so it's easier for her to choose. I did notice in my most recent visit she is given more options now and she handles it well. Eg 4 types of drink options instead of two. She is 6.
That's nice that you do that for her! Maybe eventually she can self-talk herself through the same decision-making process.
Thank you!! You just described so many things that I did as a kid that I never understood before. I was just recently diagnosed, I was misdiagnosed as bipolar and then wondered if it was borderline personality but no. It’s high functioning autism. It fits like a glove, I feel so relieved and more accepting of myself now. Your videos are helping me so much I can’t thank you enough. It’s nice to feel a part of the world now instead of an alien no one understands.
Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. I have a 5 year old daughter who were are in the process of getting a diagnosis for right now. I highly suspect she has high functioning ASD. She has always been very sensory sensitive, and was diagnosed with SPD at the age of 2. Although, I knew she had SPD or ASD when she was 12 hours old. She was a very hard baby, and was never ever happy. She would scream for hours on end, and was never able to be consoled. She has always been very sensitive to noises, touch, tastes, smells. She also has the constipation and gut issues. She will withhold bowel movements, or simply just doesn’t have the urge to go everyday. She will literally starve herself rather than eat any texture of food she finds difficult to handle. She has described certain textures as feeling like glass or needles in her mouth. She has an abnormal response to pain at times as well. She will scream for the nurse at the pediatrician’s office to give her another shot. She will scream at me or my husband to kick her (which we would never do), and she has hurt herself. Did you ever have self harm tendencies? If so, how did you overcome it as you got older. I worry very much for her as she ages and becomes a teenager. Her psychologist will also be working with her on overcoming this as well. She also has a very hard time with emotional regulation and the meltdowns are so bad at times. She has shown some OCD traits,a nod ADHD traits as well, and struggles badly with anxiety. So I’m hoping we can get an accurate diagnosis for her. There are so many times I feel she fits perfectly on the ASD spectrum, and other times I wonder if I’m making something out of nothing. I guess maybe that’s part of the masking? This was long. Thank you for reading it if you got this far. Thank you for your channel. I will be watching more of your videos to try and learn more to try to help my baby girl.
I have Autism, ADHD and some OCD traits. I also have issues with emotional regulation and anxiety. I struggle with self harm especially when I was younger. Your daughter is too young but when she is a teenager DBT might help. It helped me a lot and I hear there is a new variety of DBT that is geared more towards Autism. I don't know if this helps, but good luck with your daughter. I hope things go well for her.
How is your daughter going now? I suspect ASD in mine well I am certain. She is almost 5 and although she doesnt self harm she very much struggles with emotional regulation.
Thank you so much! Your comments are so relevant! Our five-year-old daughter has the same issues. It’s good to know that there’s hope!
As an current child who might be getting diagnosed with ASD and ADHD, This channel can possibly help me. I quite enjoy it aswell.
I related to EVERYTHING! Thank you for making people more aware! Also, you should do a video on what NOT to say to autistic people! ❤
Thanks so much for watching my video, Sarah! And I have that on my to-do video list. :)
I have pretty much all of the traits you mentioned, except I had early speech. Everything else (even intestinal issues…. I’m gluten intolerant).
Thank you for sharing.
OMG, how did you get into my brain??! ;) Awesome video...I can identify with all nine! Thank you!!!
My daughter’s childhood was exactly like yours in every way except speech. She was the polar opposite, with a huge vocabulary by age 18 months, speaking like a 6 year old by age two. She has always excelled at speech, vocabulary and reading and tested at a 12th grade level when she was 6. But everything else you mentioned, she had as a child, and many of those traits she still has and was only recently diagnosed at age 38 after decades of misdiagnosis. She has a genius IQ as I suspect you also have. My nephew is 32 and autistic and also a genius IQ. The mind is a fascinating, yet often, frustrating thing to comprehend. Your videos are helping me, as a parent, learn things about my daughter that I never understood before. Thank you. So many people think autism is a male thing and it’s not, it just presents differently in boys who are more likely to have it so the girls go misunderstood.
I relate to literally every single one of your points. Thanks so much for this video!
I’m in the early stages of research and gathering information for my official evaluation without any family members, unfortunately. So I’m trying to pool all the early traits I had from childhood, and your video has been the closest to my experience. It’s triggered a flood of memories, and I’ve been able to endlessly list examples based on your points alone. I greatly appreciate you for creating such helpful content.
I’m a new subscriber! Thanks, again.
Thank you for sharing your journey! Great job on the videos I've seen so far. I look forward to more. While I have never been diagnosed, I feel like I could be...my experience with examples are: I had speech therapy for my struggle with saying words that started with an S. I think if I recall that it was kindergarten or first grade. When I get tired beyond my capacity or overwhelmed, I can't form sentences properly or say things wrong. My mind will go blank. I definitely need alone time to decompress from large crowds, events and parties with family/friends. I get noticeably agitated and extremely overwhelmed and you can tell with my tone when I'm overwhelmed. Noise affects me when I'm extremely overwhelmed. I can't do small talk. I am terrible with eye contact. It's very awkward, but I try extremely hard to stay engaged when I need to. My emotions from my family's perspective could be seen as very flat. I don't get excited about things that one should. However, contrary to their belief, I do have an extreme interest in landscape/nature photography, poetry, pathology and tornadoes. I get hyper excited and stop whatever I'm doing to take the photograph. I'm a literal person and am loyal to what one literally says. It can be seen as obedient almost or I need things explained if I don't understand the statement or request. 🫠 I obsess over holographic and pastel colors.
Anyway I hope everyone has a safe space they can be however they need to for their growth and authenticity. You aren't alone whether you're diagnosed or not. You matter as a human. 🌞
I was about 98% just like you as a child and still living with similar. I have never been diagnosed, quite frequently think people hate me or are laughing at me. You so remind me of me.. always the quiet one sitting in the background taking all the details in, not sharing your thoughts. I was called shy, but I really don't think that was it at all. Thank you for sharing about yourself. I was fortunate to have a horse for about three years of my life from 12-14 ish and loved it, such a bond between myself and animals.
My daughter has 8 out of 9 traits. She is actually not shy at all. I keep getting told she is social so that disqualies her and it is a behavioral issue. Thank you for your video. She is 4 and about to start preschool. You are amazing!!
Hi Diana, thank you so much for watching my video! Being social is absolutely NOT a disqualifying factor, and if a doctor tells you that, they do not understand who Autism presents itself in girls. I'd recommend checking out the channel Chloe Hayden (Princess Aspien). She is Autistic and is the most high-energy, social person I've ever seen. Best of luck to your daughter. She is awesome and can do anything she puts her mind to!
I am not shy and I have Autism.
My speech was extremely early and very clear. I think it's because it was an intense interest. By age 2 I could already correctly pronounce complicated words. I was very shy with strangers, had very few friends, but I was extremely attached to them. I didn't know how to interact with other kids that weren't them. I didn't have that many sensory issues, probably because I lived in a very small village that was very quiet. Kindergarten and primary school were in a small town, too. Later I needed music to deal with the time on the bus. I hate certain strong smells like fish, they still make me physically sick. I'm quite flexible, but if things don't go as they were in the plan in my head, I just can't function. It's like my whole world breaks down. My intense interests were books and language (I was very particular about spelling and stuff). I always prepare the night before because it takes me too long to pick clothes in the morning. I needed things a certain way, that's for sure. I can't think of an example, but with certain toys I wouldn't let anyone else play with MY toys. That was very important
Oh my God!! The picking out clothes thing!! My daughter is 17 now and is much better about our but it's still a nightmare if her outfit isn't prepared for school the next day. I've never heard that from anyone else but I knew it was part of her Autism. Thank you for sharing btw. ❤ My daughter was diagnosed late too and I feel like people don't believe me so I'm going to be sharing these!
I just got my daughter's diagnosis for autism today. Thanks for the information. She has had major gut issues since she was a baby so that really stuck out for me!
Your are amazing Olivia! 🦋 I had all of your Traits in a different ways so and my 2 daughters.....our Traits is very similar with some variations! Thanks to share about your Mild Spectrum! You doing a amazing job, and you helping to save the World! Soon our planet is gonna be emerge in ART, Creativity & Resilence! And you are parte of this! LOVE, PEACE & FREEDOM! 💗❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
I've always had a horse obsession, but I have to admit I also liked model cars with shiney wheels and loved to spin the wheels and watch them spin for hours.
When I was a kid I was OBSESSED with whales. I could tell you every type, how much they weighed, the length, life expectancy, location of the oceans, what they feed on, etc. I grew out of that. I also loved all my pets and treated them like humans. I would bring animals, snakes, turtles, etc in the home and my mom would constantly have to be telling me that I could not do that. I treated all animals like they were humans and I still treat all animals with much more respect than the average person. I also loved reading and drawing. I had difficulty with deciding what to wear as well and when I was a teen I typically went to the mall and chose whatever outfit was on the manikin. I was also incredibly shy!
Autistic for 17 years now almost 18. I am amazed right now
Thank you from my heart for making these videos. It’s like you’re talking about my daughter but with a few small differences. It’s mind blowing. Thank you.
I am on the spectrum with few traits.. but this is my youngest daughter. 110% . She is 3 yrs old & autistic as well She is the center of our household. The warm sunshiny light of our lives. She's bossy! Doesnt wear pants (takes them off Hates tight clothing) She eats veggies like crazy ! but doesn't eat meat ..she'll put it to her mouth, but it goes right back on to the plate. She likes her alone time. She has her meltdowns (sometimes not just tantrums, but due to over stimulation, overwhelming & sensory issues) . She also has gut issues..Constipation is very common regardless of her eating veggies. (Meal replacement & protein breakfast shakes have been a life saver for low iron & help get her somewhat regular.) She also has trouble making decisions. she has a lot of trouble choosing what to watch or drink.. Pretty much this entire video sums up our little sweetheart❤🧡💛
I'm an older autistic woman who was diagnosed a few years ago in late middle age. Unlike Olivia, I did not have delayed speech, quite the opposite. My parents and grandmother sa id that I said my first word when I was nine months old, and within the next two months progressed to full sentences. My mother added that I never shut up after that, whiich is a *bit* of an exaggeration, but not by much. After my diagnosis, one of my doctors told me that this is called being hyperverbal, and is also a fairly commom autistic trait.
This video series is interesting, and fun to watch!
Olivia, thank you so much for your videos. For the first time in my life I feel validated. You are so amazing!
Spot on like my daughter. She was also diagnosed later, at age 19. Thank you for raising awareness about girls on the spectrum.