It happens during my sleep... i literally have lucid dreams all night because of tht... i dont think anyone knows how it feels unless they are going through it themselves...its too overwhelming... gosh i need some new info. But the Fe-Se loop in so uncomfortable! Its weird and kinda selfish...
If FE isn't your first function you will never really get into an FE-SE loop...because always go back to base meaning NI- (TI)...but we counteract through FE...at some point our energy is out, we go back to NI and regenerate
@Braxton Mills what does that tell you?...you haven't been giving yourself a proper balance. Remember all the points from the bootcamp. Slow and steady wins the race...AND the good thing is, you recognize it was an NI-TI Loop yesterday...meaning next time you will be able to stop yourself much earlier. Start actively thinking about creating something instead of thinking it through.
I have always tried to understand and drove myself to misery. Sometimes I have to remind myself to move on and let go of things. I focus on the things that are important to me and leave behind the things not worthy of my time. So far, I am happier. I don’t feel as isolated.
Wow. This brought me to tears. I think I've been in an Ni Ti loop for over half of my life. It's constant. Now I can see why my mental health has suffered so much and that there is a way out. I have a lot of work to do. Thank you for explaining this so well. x
When I reach a certain level of stress it triggers my Ni-Ti loop. And I spiral downward to a regression in my psychology. Three things that can make it stop are 1. Hearing myself talk it out loud with someone, I can better understand a new insights, but I recently detox from my toxic friends, and maybe just have one person to express myself ; 2. My Ni-Ti loop is searching for one solution, and once I find it I can come out of it; 3. Door slam, or using a personal boundary by saying no to the stress, then replaying that interaction with my boundary function to tweak it diplomatically. I agree that seeking validations from others is people pleasing, lowering my value to others, and stop seeking validations, a zen-like state of self confidence, being comfortable in my own skin took over, it felt like a new level in my INFJ evolution. I switch to an internal locus of control mindset. What I dislike is becoming aware that I'm in my Ni-Ti loop, and i can't stop it until it runs its course, but you provided more insights about tossing back in my Fe and that new awareness can help when I become self aware that, Damn it, I doing it again, my Ni Ti loop. It's about saying no to myself as in self discipline, just sucks being aware I'm in it yet it keeps going.I just thought of a fourth option... try getting back into the "present" moment, because when I force myself to go for a walk and notice my immediate surroundings, or bike ride listening to my music while concentrating on the traffic, being in the present time frame stops my Ni-Ti loop. Would that be tossing in my Se into the loop? Thanks for lighting the darkness with a torch and showing us the way.. very INFJ of you.
Sounds like you have some good coping mechanisms and tossing your SE into the loop will help some...better though if you start expressing yourself, as you said: talk it out loud, express yourself through a song you listen to and most importantly create an emotional atmosphere outside of your NI-TI story you have been thinking about...so a new project, something that will improve your life. Happy my videos are helpful :) thanks for the feedback
Trying to get back to a sense of normalcy. I was in the loop for several months. I started a new job last January; was supposed to be a big deal to be working for this new place. Turns out the owner was a narcissist and it took me way too long to figure it out. I drove myself crazy trying to get him to realize my value. I quit at the end of November; I could not take it any longer. I told him I felt like I was a square peg trying to hammer myself into his round hole. Although it has been several months, it has been a challenge getting back to myself. Thank you for the video!
Important thing is you figured out that it wasn't a healthy situation. No matter how it took...and next time you won't let it get that far...there is no reason to make the other one understand your value or that you are different...just leave and find a place where you are being appreciated...so the next job really has to be a different kind of atmosphere...not the "same job" just somewhere else.
Everytime I plan something for my future and I don't talk about my ideas until I drain my energy I get in an overthinking state and it gives me so much stress because I cannot get it out and I get no feedback for my plans. I think and think, especially when I am trying to sleep, processing every bit of information I get from books or courses, plan my moves in my head, having no patience until I apply them... Getting tired of everything and give up on my plans... I need to talk about them, I need feedback and I need to get out my excitement, but sometimes I have no people around to talk to and I cannot call anyone at 3AM. Also, I am an introvert and my talking skills are trash if I am not familiar with someone.. Here's another thing to improve. Also, as I need to get this out of my head, I decided to work hard and become a manager because I got so tired of my actual job. It is so repetitive, I cannot use any new ideas and whenever I try to do it, it doesn't have a big life cycle. IT starts to really suck for me, but in the past I really, really thought I didn't want a leadership or management role, but deep down I do. I was always a natural leader in my school projects, but I was too blind and scared. Thanks for this video, you opened my blind eyes and mbti really helped me realise some things about myself. Thanks! Never give up on Fe, dear people.
I'm slowly getting my Fe going on a bit by showing up by letting the goal TRY be my indicator for change this year. I've been more self-expressive and trying to not feel regrets. An interesting thing is that my teacher told me I could help around in my study and they're encouraging me to join in, it's just a matter of am i gonna let myself be heard or decide to pass on the opportunity to practice Fe and Se because of fear. Your video was super helpful and I'm so glad I made it my goal this year to TRY.
Glad I could help and TRYING is already a great step forward. You do it a couple of times and you will see how the resistance will subside. You go this!
This video helped me to see three things. (1) Why I had a lot of my relationship problems in the past and (2) Why I'm not having them now and (3) How to prevent them from happening again.
ALL INFJ REPEAT AFTER ME: UNDERSTANDING IS NOT LOVE!!!!!! WOW! The whole "YOUR THE ONLY ONE THAT UNDERSTANDS THEM AND THAT IS HOW YOU ARE GOING TO GET LOVE" MIND TRAP is deadly, literally because it leaves a huge EMPTINESS where OUR LIFE DISAPPEARS for SOMEONE ELSE. And when we eventually EXPLODE we are left in our DARK PAIN without ANYONE. We can fall into a terrible and even dangerous depression. I hung out with a lot of highly intelligent but abusive people thinking I could talk my way into their hearts. But when I got assaulted by their leader, I realized they never cared because they are lost in their minds without any heart. So if ANY OF YOU COME FROM ABUSIVE FAMILIES, you have to REALLY WORK ON SELF CARE rather than ANALYZING your PROBLEMS. Eating healthy food, sleeping, playing and saving your money and a deep effort towards your personal safety will CHANGE YOUR LIFE! It is the hardest lesson in the world to learn WE MUST STAND ALONE AND MAKE OUR OWN WAY IN THE WORLD! This means that what we think and feel about ourselves is ALWAYS OF VALUE and far more important than all the people that come and go in our lives!
You are so so so great...always to the point with so much respect...I am 48 years old and for the first time I am speaking my truth... I don't recognize myself lately of how easy words come to my mouth while till recently I had a huuuuuuuge problem doing so!! Thank you❤❤❤🌹🌹
Thank you for this! It validated what I just did of getting out of my NI - TI loop as I accepted my FE, after a month long struggle. I focused on taking care of myself first and it really made the difference. Have to accept that people come and go and if they can't respect me, then so be it. We also deserve to be happy :)
Thank you, I feel understood and truly guided. You give out great advice and examples. I've been in a loop since ends of July 2021 after getting dumped... I have even considered suicide these past 3 days. I was crying by the 8th minute... I just cannot thank you enough I wasn't ready to give up but I just couldn't find anything worth living for... but I am, it's me, it's always been me. After college, getting my "dream job", getting committed in a serious relationship I thought I had it all, that I had accomplished "the plan" and life was perfect, but it wasn't perfect... I was getting underpaid in my previous job and was in a relationship with a narcissist (or so I believe) that controlled everything in my life, what I ate, who I saw. when I would visit my family, when I could see my friends, how I had to dress, how I had to spend my money, where I had to work and live. I was then so restrained that I could not leave the bedroom and was okay with it because I thought it was for the best... I would just smoke all day and since my job is a Home Office job (medical bilingual interpreter) he set up my computer in the bedroom so I worked where I slept and ate there too because my exmother-in-law is just not pleasant to be around. Her visions in life and morals were not something I approved of, I never told her but I would just avoid any type of interaction with her.... So I felt happy because I made him and his mom happy or try to because I paid the bills and was the "Good Housewife" you know the cooking cleaning, blah blah blah and then afterwards back to the room because that was safe and that's where I had to be until I was needed, there was constant tension and I could just not understand why they hated the best for me if I did everything to support them all the time, I paid more than half of all expenses in the house and even paid UBER rides to go out so he wouldn't have to worry about his gas or taking me to work/school or where ever I needed to go. He would get upset if I didn't read the Google Maps directions correctly or if I didn't know the address fully. it's like he would make sure I wasted all my money, so he could feel superior with his cashier wage. After I had a miscarriage in December 2020, I was done. I spent two weeks with fevers, pain and begging him to take me to the doctor but he just wouldn't give me a moment of his time to take me to the doctors... and when he did was when I had discharge... he literally had no option there. That was the moment I knew I was expecting a child but had lost it... I was 2 months pregnant, that really broke something inside my heart. I was treated at home like if nothing had happened, I would cry and hold my tummy sometimes and he wouldn't hold me or anything he wouldn't even look at me because he didn't care" it was for the best" he would say "we weren't even ready" ... but maybe I was. So I managed to move out to my friends apartment by next month however his landlord didn't approve of me living there due to the contract they had signed so I moved back with him, things we're never the same but I managed to save again and this time I did move out , like 5 months later. I was offered a small house at an affordable prize by an exclassmate, so the time came I told him I had found a house and was moving out, he got very upset and almost cried I felt really bad at the time because I thought I had hurt his feelings so I then said... "this doesn't mean we are breaking up it's just that I need my space and so do my cats" so he then said "So you are still leaving if I don't leave with you?" and I said Yes... he then decided to move out of his mom's house and move into the house I started to rent... he brokeup with me 1 month later . After I told him that he had to help me around the house if he was not going to help me financially (although he had a job) he brokeup with me by the next day after he came back from work "because I was too good for him, that I deserved better" and he never returned and I never did either, I was done. But got stuck in the Ni Ti Loop of so "I do everything and practically destroyed myself and that's still not good enough??" and I tried dating and it was like the same person but different physical, they all said the same thing.... that I am too good, and its men older or younger than me. It's so frustrating to feel that you are too much and not enough at the same time. So I gave up, I am tired of trying. Life is just going to get even harder if I overcome this because that is how life works, better off just killing myself than to keep on with this struggle. But that little voice inside of me wanted to understand myself on Why does this happen to me? why I shouldn't kill myself? I am into astrology and spirituality but that was not enough for me at this point so I started investigating about personality types turns out I am and INFJ and there are a lot of people like me that have similar stories and people on RUclips that are providing eye opening content like you. Thank you, today is a brand new day, a new beginning for me. Thank you for saving my life with this 26:03 minute long video. Blessed be 🌹✨
Currently going through this at my work. We just got a new employee that is very stubborn and older than me. I am the manager and try to get him to do what I want for the sake of the company and have had difficulty so I assumed I needed to understand him better. I can tell I'm not getting though, in the fact the opposite is happening because I think he can tell I'm not being as straight forward I as I want to be and come off phony. While some more understanding might be helpful the more important thing is to be less afraid of confrontation and direct about what needs to happen. Time to tap into my FE more! Thanks for another amazing video, always hitting topics i need to work on!
You got this Joel! You are his supervisor so set the tone. He has to be one to plays by your rules, and if you feel mean, so be it....this is just your mind playing a trick on you...because he is the one being disrespectful
@@Wenzes Thanks Wenzes! This last week went so much better. Just being aware of the problem can make such a big difference and your video definitely brought it to my attention.
This was so helpful. You said “ .....this is the holy grail” . Yes , yes it was for me to lol. I needed to recognize this . I’ve been blind to it . Thank you so much 🤗💜
You are a genius who is gifted beyond words. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and living your truth. You are an inspiration and are radically going to change the world for many and especially for the hero archetype that is the INFJ.
1st of all, your eyebrows look amazing. 2nd, this video, much like everyone else's reaction has completely blown my mind. I feel liberated in the sense of finally putting into words where I have been stuck on and off for years. Some of the best moments of my life are when I get into the Fe (2014, 2016) and that's when I truly felt authentically me. Nice to feel a weight lifted. Thank you!!
I showed up to work as myself in Friday and in a couple stressful situations I gave my point of view and it turned out well. I’m hoping this is a beginning to getting out of this Ni Ti loop I’m in because I am climbing out of a mental rock bottom. Thank you for your videos
WOW right on Sister! I will lay awake all night ranting IN my head, but the moment I WRITE IT OUT, my loop just disappears, especially if I READ IT ALOUD! I think using my SOUND SENSE lets another part of my brain process it. ALSO MUSIC REALLY HELPS shift me out of my MOOD. Others here also suggest WALKING OUTSIDE! Walking forces us to get back in touch with a GREAT WIDE WORLD and out of our HEADS and experience life TRU OUR BODY. But in the end you are right that we have to FINALLY LET GO OF CARING ABOUT IF OTHERS NEED/LOVE/APPRECIATE our LIFE or WORK, because WE HAVE TO ACCEPT OURSELVES. This can be like asking ourselves to do MAGIC TRICKS and very very DIFFICULT because we have to start LIVING from the OUTSIDE rather than DROWNING WITHIN. The MIND IS A TRAP and some answer come from JUST LIVING and EXPERIENCING THE WORLD without THOUGHTS! Think about a person making pottery, then JUST FEEL THRU IT, they DONT THINK but just ACT, experiencing LIFE DIRECTLY MAKING OUR OWN DREAMS COME TRUE
Omg!!!! This!!!! Ugh. Everything about this is so true for me. I love and appreciate your deep understanding of INFJ's . Your work is so necessary for us . 🙏🏼❤️👌🏼
The other AMAZING discovery you share is that WE REBUILD OUR EMOTIONAL FOUNDATION FROM THE INSIDE OUT! it is like our hearts are hanging dangerously outside of our ribcage. Because we absorb the world emotionally, we are knocked around a lot by the toxicity outside of us. So we have to take our SHARP BRILLIANT AWARENESS and TURN IT INWARD and DECIDE WHAT WE WANT TO FEEL FIRST before STEPPING OUTSIDE. WE HAVE TO TAKE OUR HEART BACK INTO OUR BODY and TAKE CARE OF OUR FEELINGS AND OUR NEEDS FIRST.! This is the hardest challenge of my life, how to CREATE MYSELF just for me ALONE rather than ALL MY MEANING & VALUE coming from HELPING OTHERS!
Thank you for creating this video! You have been able to articulate the interpersonal growth I’ve been working on for the last several years. I feel like right now I’m in the middle of fully grasping the concept of leaning into my FE as my strength. Owning it and trying to show up as my authentic self, no matter where I am in life. It’s still a work in progress but at the end of the day I feel like my determination to make it feel more natural is getting more solid. This video really helped me take in more information so my Ni-Ti loop could take a break. I will say I am always trying to take in more information to help create Fe so the Ni-Ti loop happens quite a bit but I’ve been very good at recognizing it happening. My new trick is “hmmm, I’ll come back to that” and move on with my day in order to create less of the emotional drama that comes with it naturally. Anyway, thanks again :) I’ve recently discovered your channel and I absolutely love the content.
Thank you for this video Wezes! I am new to your channel and just starting to dig in to your vast library of videos. This one has already taught me something fresh about being an INFJ. I new about my Jungian stack but had not watched or read about this particular Ni Ti loop we get into. I grew up with no knowledge of MBTI. But we are what others call "ruminators". But for us, we often don't know how to stop.
I noticed this recently when four people were hired from the post office for a customer service position. They worked in the warehouse they had a culture that was backstabbing drama, bullying, intimidating and they came to this beautiful atmosphere and brought that with them One of the employees had already worked with us and he was beautiful, kind and thoughtful until these people came and then he became because he didn't want to be seen as an outsider by them, become one of them. It made it very uncomfortable for me on multiple occasions. I realized that there was something else bothering me. It wasn't simply their Rapport. It was something else I couldn't identify. It finally came up with the understanding that they all were alcoholics. I can't be around alcoholics. I'm an Al-Anon and it's very uncomfortable for me so. I have been The Observer. And it shocked me to do that. I couldn't figure out why was I being The Observer and not the engager but because of that dissonance I had to be in order to complete my work. It also happened with another woman at one point she has left. She was also either into drugs or alcohol or both but I had such immediate disdain for this person and I didn't have any identify viable information about it but I was correct the on both cases. I am correct I stand tall. It has become a culture that I don't fit into because of this exterior condition that they engage in which of course I have no control over except for possibly leaving the job because there's more of them than there is of me. Or having a miserable time everyday I work. This is so helpful thank you so much
Is this why i typed earlier that i felt like i was inna way learning stuff and techniques i already used to go through a healing process.... but i feel like ima redoing it over and over again.... 🤠 Different folk same strokes
I'm in a loop because I stay in shit jobs/people that don't treat me well because I need the money. I'm an artist and for me all jobs are draining my energy.
Start small but start marketing your art. Find a way how this can create money for you. Work on you Money Mindset. Very often we feel like we can't make money by doing what we love but it is possible...it is all mindset. Start for example with one of the books from Denise Duffield Thomas...(or join the Bootcamp, there too we talk about your passion and generating income from it so you can quit the jobs that are draining your energy, and to start valuing your art more)
@@Wenzes Wenzes I'm workin right now at marketing my art, creating more, and my mindset. I'm in extremes, I know that I can totally do it (I read tons of books/videos/did inner work etc. in the last years), but then I lose hope because I feel the progress is too small or it takes too long.. so I feel stuck in the loop. I heard about "Lucky bitch", I'll check the books! Thank you for responding! 💜
It will take long but that is okay...and if you fall back, you get back up...the time will pass anyway so use the time building on your vision. On top, you will start feeling great the moment you commit to fight for yourself and not stop ever...that is the biggest reward, that is where the fulfillment really comes from...becoming a person who fights for herself
@@Wenzes That is so true!! And when I have a few days in a row that I really work on my dreams, it feels veeery fulfilling and I feel the flow. I think I have to be totally commited daily, so I keep that momentum longer, and start getting easier!! Thank you, I just got some clarity by talking to you 💜💜
You explain MBTI like is 100% accurate😂 and people and personalities are not evolving and changing😅. I spent lots of time studying , reading almost all the books on MBTI and took lots of test. Every time during past 10 years I had different results? I got ISFJ. INFJ. ISTJ. INTJ. INTP. ISFP. ( maybe today circumstances makes me an INFJ , but for sure 10 years ago I was a ISTJ 😮)Can you explain why , dear “INFJ coach”?
I wonder how trauma affects this loop. I feel that I am pretty effective at expressing my true self, as I’m in middle age, and have been working through this stuff for a while, but when something very traumatic occurs, it throws a real wrench into the progress. Complex post traumatic stress has its own profile, and its own requirements. It is easy to mix the trauma and the “you” together and get confused. So when the loop occurs in this scenario, I have yet to find a book, video and definitely not a therapist who seems to understand how to help with this. Do you know that I went to a couple of therapists when I experienced a severe trauma, assuming I could use the extra support. They both told me that I seemed to have a grasp on things and that they didn’t think they had anything to help me. Like, that was not the thing I needed to hear, I guess. You’d like to think, when you feel like you are sinking, that something can give you a hand, to help keep you afloat, until you get back on your feet, just a temporary hand.
Same for me with PTSD, same useless therapists moving me up the chain to a psychiatrist who said I was fine then back to social workers who insist on toxic medication that does not cure a brain disorder that literally loops into flashbacks! The medical world realized that it is your brain trapped in painful loops, so the way out of traumautic triggers is USING OUR PHYSICAL SENSES to CALM THE BODY and shift out of ALARMS and into our PARASYMPATHEIC NERVOUS SYSTEM which REPAIRS & DIGESTS (why eating helps and why eating disorders are so epidemic in modern world) So here are my cures, LOOK UP EMDR eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy, it is just moving your eyes back and forth to process trauma with your frontal lobe, IT WORKS! CALMING OUR BODY IS VITAL WATCH ASMR whispering RUclips VIDEOS that use specific repetitive sounds to calm the BODYS NERVOUS SYSTEM (find your favorites, each person has some sounds they like and others they dont, like hair brushing or tapping) CHECK OUT TAPPING on face/wrists called EFT emotional freedom technique USE POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS everyday like before meals like a prayer, cheesy yes, but they work to reduce self hate or fearful or raging thoughts SOFT GENTLE EXERCISE EVERY DAY,, stretching yoga, dance to music, and walking DONT OVER EXERCISE because TRAUMA prevents muscle repair and long term physical exhaustion CREATES PAINFUL FIBROMYALGIA which is scar tissue. Please consider eating AN APPLE A DAY with MAGNESIUM and B VITAMINS because it helps expel toxins from TRAUMA and RELAXES MUSCLES! REMOVE ALL STRESS from your life, as much as you can, including FAMILY TRIGGERS, SOCIAL EVENTS, TV SHOWS, DRUGS OR ALCOHOL AND junk FOOD DYES, MSG AND Less CAFFEINE, eat more VEGGIE SOUP, throw a bag of frozen soup into a can of chicken soup, its a miracle cure for sleep. and TRY TO CREATE A CALM SAFE BEDROOM where you can MEDITATE before bed just by COUNTING YOUR BREATH IN AND OUT and SLEEP! Anything that triggers our adrenalin system iincluding chocolate, sugar and chemicals will RETRIGGER HIGH ALERT PTSD TRAUMA. The only way to heal PTSD is to ALLOW THE MIND-HEART-BODY to feel SAFE again enough TO RECOVER, otherwise, the loop remains. And as far as being an INFJ, we live BACKWARD ALL EXPOSED TO THE WORLD turned inside out and have to learn to TURN OUR HEARTS INSIDE and PUSH EVERYONE ELSES NEEDS OUT, because as adults we are alone and have to care for ourselves. This part is the hardest challenge, to make our own lives instead of making lives for others. I wish you the best and hope one of these techniques can help you find some peace.
Since I am also an ASPIE, it is hard...... okay scratch that, it is very difficult for me to recognize nonverbal Communications and nonverbal cues. I struggle with this almost all the time. There are also numerous other things that I struggle with as well, just because I'm an infj/ ASPIE.
Dun dun dun dun.....14:37 you got me lol But do others get a blank slate of mind in social gathering when your Se is low? Like too much time was spent in your Ti and now you don't know how to interact?
Could someone please explain the part where she talks about the part of self that you don't share with others and keeping a "front" on to protect yourself? From what I got the message seems to be to not allow your deepest most sentimental and emotional feelings to show to others? To keep a stable baseline on the go in every environment? What's an example of the extroverted sensing being used?
About audio quality: there is annoying echo, maybe consider trying better microphone or have some audio guys to clear the background echo noise from audio track. That way headset/headphone users would be happier and it will be more enjoyable to listen to your voice as well as absorb information easier
Is there anyone who gets stuck in NiTi loops (regarding past regrets/future worries) as a default mechanism to calm Fi anxiety? I find myself drifting into the loops regularly and it is stressful to fight against it, eventhough I know it's wasting time because it doesn't really prepare me for anything
OK i under stand a loot of what you are saying at my age how can i show up for me,i know i am a good person but i have cut a lot of people because i am been taken for granted. by friends and family.so at this point in my life I am very alone, if i can make a change while the world is sick.
I think I know who you talking about. there was this guy that referenced me as Gabe (gay abe) we know his little niche market. by insights the guy got away at every turn. I couldnt locate his tresspass. But after insult 5 dolar bill was given to me paid me back. I didn't risk any karma of being paid back by wrong source. so I gave the guy 4 dollars 3 quaters 2 dimes and a nickle. to be sure by karma status and symbolic tangible world he was not going to be paid back the same way. More over did I warn him. 750 7/05/1980 is also the birth date of building and he lives in it. I warned him of others that would curse the day of my birth if it was that bad, he was living in the same building. so I have my ways to safe guard interests with all the irony of things
Told you I'm not a program but a human being so quit with your initialization loop....as really makes me wonder if you are all programs which means you need to move onto the next sequence in your programming or, Inversely, be human beings back to me
Example just asked an online contact to take a personality test. He balked. I'm holding out. He's very needy. Too much interest lol. He's not going to available for 2 years due to contract out of country. What is interesting about that lol? Next.
This is such a Ti heavy video, my Te is reviewing every flaw to your arguments in rebellion, there's no consideration INFJ's Ti being wrong or flawed, sure it's a subjective function, but still it's so limiting to base everything on that one point of view. What if INFJ are overpleasing with Fe because they feel insecure, the other person notices that and mentions it because it is making them feel uncomfortable and also because they want the INFJ to be able to feel free of the need to please, but INFJ just keep pleasing more and more (overbearing Fe) as a consequence because of their own insecurities until there comes a point where the Ni-Ti loop activates and INFJ are trying to find the logic of why and how to fix it... "I'm being so nice and it's not working, oh it must be the other person's fault", flawed logic instead of accepting it might actually be their own doing. Then the flawed logic is imposed on the other person, who was honest from the start and at this point suffering incessant questioning, looking for absolute coherence, reviewing every single aspect of the other persons behaviour. There's no self growth in this system if Fe is always the solution. And depending on Fi critic (what the INFJ really wants and being able to express it) to get you out of the sticky situation is a lot to ask for... Going on walks, enjoying life and engaging positive Se sounds like a much healthier solution. Sorry if I am not right, the NI-Ti loop is difficult to deal with and I am trying to understand and propose a different approach to help.
Why the heck do you change the distance to/from the camera all the time? This makes it terrible to watch. Is this some fancy thing you have heard to be cool? Please stop it! INFJ, sigma
What are your experiences with the INFJ NI-TI Loop?
It happens during my sleep... i literally have lucid dreams all night because of tht... i dont think anyone knows how it feels unless they are going through it themselves...its too overwhelming... gosh i need some new info. But the Fe-Se loop in so uncomfortable! Its weird and kinda selfish...
If FE isn't your first function you will never really get into an FE-SE loop...because always go back to base meaning NI- (TI)...but we counteract through FE...at some point our energy is out, we go back to NI and regenerate
@@LevelDroneRCX you can do it, it's time to start pushing your message more
@Braxton Mills what does that tell you?...you haven't been giving yourself a proper balance. Remember all the points from the bootcamp. Slow and steady wins the race...AND the good thing is, you recognize it was an NI-TI Loop yesterday...meaning next time you will be able to stop yourself much earlier. Start actively thinking about creating something instead of thinking it through.
👏👏👏
I have always tried to understand and drove myself to misery. Sometimes I have to remind myself to move on and let go of things. I focus on the things that are important to me and leave behind the things not worthy of my time. So far, I am happier. I don’t feel as isolated.
Amazing! You are already on a great path!!!
The hardest challenge, to try with everything we have inside us to create our own lives instead of creating lives for others!
Wow. This brought me to tears. I think I've been in an Ni Ti loop for over half of my life. It's constant. Now I can see why my mental health has suffered so much and that there is a way out. I have a lot of work to do. Thank you for explaining this so well. x
When I reach a certain level of stress it triggers my Ni-Ti loop. And I spiral downward to a regression in my psychology. Three things that can make it stop are 1. Hearing myself talk it out loud with someone, I can better understand a new insights, but I recently detox from my toxic friends, and maybe just have one person to express myself ; 2. My Ni-Ti loop is searching for one solution, and once I find it I can come out of it; 3. Door slam, or using a personal boundary by saying no to the stress, then replaying that interaction with my boundary function to tweak it diplomatically.
I agree that seeking validations from others is people pleasing, lowering my value to others, and stop seeking validations, a zen-like state of self confidence, being comfortable in my own skin took over, it felt like a new level in my INFJ evolution. I switch to an internal locus of control mindset.
What I dislike is becoming aware that I'm in my Ni-Ti loop, and i can't stop it until it runs its course, but you provided more insights about tossing back in my Fe and that new awareness can help when I become self aware that, Damn it, I doing it again, my Ni Ti loop.
It's about saying no to myself as in self discipline, just sucks being aware I'm in it yet it keeps going.I just thought of a fourth option... try getting back into the "present" moment, because when I force myself to go for a walk and notice my immediate surroundings, or bike ride listening to my music while concentrating on the traffic, being in the present time frame stops my Ni-Ti loop. Would that be tossing in my Se into the loop?
Thanks for lighting the darkness with a torch and showing us the way.. very INFJ of you.
Sounds like you have some good coping mechanisms and tossing your SE into the loop will help some...better though if you start expressing yourself, as you said: talk it out loud, express yourself through a song you listen to and most importantly create an emotional atmosphere outside of your NI-TI story you have been thinking about...so a new project, something that will improve your life.
Happy my videos are helpful :) thanks for the feedback
That was helpful for me, thank you. I'm so glad you didn't end that with, "does that make sense?" .
This is the 6th video I've watched of yours and it has changed my approach with life
❤️😊
Trying to get back to a sense of normalcy. I was in the loop for several months. I started a new job last January; was supposed to be a big deal to be working for this new place. Turns out the owner was a narcissist and it took me way too long to figure it out. I drove myself crazy trying to get him to realize my value. I quit at the end of November; I could not take it any longer. I told him I felt like I was a square peg trying to hammer myself into his round hole. Although it has been several months, it has been a challenge getting back to myself. Thank you for the video!
Important thing is you figured out that it wasn't a healthy situation. No matter how it took...and next time you won't let it get that far...there is no reason to make the other one understand your value or that you are different...just leave and find a place where you are being appreciated...so the next job really has to be a different kind of atmosphere...not the "same job" just somewhere else.
Everytime I plan something for my future and I don't talk about my ideas until I drain my energy I get in an overthinking state and it gives me so much stress because I cannot get it out and I get no feedback for my plans. I think and think, especially when I am trying to sleep, processing every bit of information I get from books or courses, plan my moves in my head, having no patience until I apply them... Getting tired of everything and give up on my plans... I need to talk about them, I need feedback and I need to get out my excitement, but sometimes I have no people around to talk to and I cannot call anyone at 3AM. Also, I am an introvert and my talking skills are trash if I am not familiar with someone.. Here's another thing to improve. Also, as I need to get this out of my head, I decided to work hard and become a manager because I got so tired of my actual job. It is so repetitive, I cannot use any new ideas and whenever I try to do it, it doesn't have a big life cycle. IT starts to really suck for me, but in the past I really, really thought I didn't want a leadership or management role, but deep down I do. I was always a natural leader in my school projects, but I was too blind and scared. Thanks for this video, you opened my blind eyes and mbti really helped me realise some things about myself. Thanks! Never give up on Fe, dear people.
I'm slowly getting my Fe going on a bit by showing up by letting the goal TRY be my indicator for change this year. I've been more self-expressive and trying to not feel regrets. An interesting thing is that my teacher told me I could help around in my study and they're encouraging me to join in, it's just a matter of am i gonna let myself be heard or decide to pass on the opportunity to practice Fe and Se because of fear. Your video was super helpful and I'm so glad I made it my goal this year to TRY.
Glad I could help and TRYING is already a great step forward. You do it a couple of times and you will see how the resistance will subside. You go this!
This video helped me to see three things. (1) Why I had a lot of my relationship problems in the past and (2) Why I'm not having them now and (3) How to prevent them from happening again.
😊👍😊
ALL INFJ REPEAT AFTER ME: UNDERSTANDING IS NOT LOVE!!!!!!
WOW! The whole "YOUR THE ONLY ONE THAT UNDERSTANDS THEM AND THAT IS HOW YOU ARE GOING TO GET LOVE" MIND TRAP is deadly, literally because it leaves a huge EMPTINESS where OUR LIFE DISAPPEARS for SOMEONE ELSE. And when we eventually EXPLODE we are left in our DARK PAIN without ANYONE. We can fall into a terrible and even dangerous depression.
I hung out with a lot of highly intelligent but abusive people thinking I could talk my way into their hearts. But when I got assaulted by their leader, I realized they never cared because they are lost in their minds without any heart. So if ANY OF YOU COME FROM ABUSIVE FAMILIES, you have to REALLY WORK ON SELF CARE rather than ANALYZING your PROBLEMS. Eating healthy food, sleeping, playing and saving your money and a deep effort towards your personal safety will CHANGE YOUR LIFE! It is the hardest lesson in the world to learn WE MUST STAND ALONE AND MAKE OUR OWN WAY IN THE WORLD! This means that what we think and feel about ourselves is ALWAYS OF VALUE and far more important than all the people that come and go in our lives!
yes, exactly.
Yes, I don't have to know why people dislike me and even try to help them, I just need to focus on my authentic self expression ❤
Is this what I'm experiencing?? You are such a blessing for spreading awareness and knowledge for INFJ's. I lierally feel like I'm looping forever
You are so so so great...always to the point with so much respect...I am 48 years old and for the first time I am speaking my truth...
I don't recognize myself lately of how easy words come to my
mouth while till recently I had a huuuuuuuge problem doing so!! Thank you❤❤❤🌹🌹
Dude... are we the same person....?
I’m in such a matrix/twilight zone rn. This was SO Helpful!!!
😁 that‘s what I was hoping for!
I needed this so much...
😀👍
I had been in the worst Ni-Ti loop for 9-10 years.This comes right on time.Thankyou so much Wenzes.
This is so helpful. It's taken years to hear this. Thank you!
Thank you for this! It validated what I just did of getting out of my NI - TI loop as I accepted my FE, after a month long struggle. I focused on taking care of myself first and it really made the difference. Have to accept that people come and go and if they can't respect me, then so be it. We also deserve to be happy :)
Thank you, I feel understood and truly guided. You give out great advice and examples. I've been in a loop since ends of July 2021 after getting dumped... I have even considered suicide these past 3 days. I was crying by the 8th minute... I just cannot thank you enough I wasn't ready to give up but I just couldn't find anything worth living for... but I am, it's me, it's always been me. After college, getting my "dream job", getting committed in a serious relationship I thought I had it all, that I had accomplished "the plan" and life was perfect, but it wasn't perfect... I was getting underpaid in my previous job and was in a relationship with a narcissist (or so I believe) that controlled everything in my life, what I ate, who I saw. when I would visit my family, when I could see my friends, how I had to dress, how I had to spend my money, where I had to work and live. I was then so restrained that I could not leave the bedroom and was okay with it because I thought it was for the best... I would just smoke all day and since my job is a Home Office job (medical bilingual interpreter) he set up my computer in the bedroom so I worked where I slept and ate there too because my exmother-in-law is just not pleasant to be around. Her visions in life and morals were not something I approved of, I never told her but I would just avoid any type of interaction with her.... So I felt happy because I made him and his mom happy or try to because I paid the bills and was the "Good Housewife" you know the cooking cleaning, blah blah blah and then afterwards back to the room because that was safe and that's where I had to be until I was needed, there was constant tension and I could just not understand why they hated the best for me if I did everything to support them all the time, I paid more than half of all expenses in the house and even paid UBER rides to go out so he wouldn't have to worry about his gas or taking me to work/school or where ever I needed to go. He would get upset if I didn't read the Google Maps directions correctly or if I didn't know the address fully. it's like he would make sure I wasted all my money, so he could feel superior with his cashier wage. After I had a miscarriage in December 2020, I was done. I spent two weeks with fevers, pain and begging him to take me to the doctor but he just wouldn't give me a moment of his time to take me to the doctors... and when he did was when I had discharge... he literally had no option there. That was the moment I knew I was expecting a child but had lost it... I was 2 months pregnant, that really broke something inside my heart. I was treated at home like if nothing had happened, I would cry and hold my tummy sometimes and he wouldn't hold me or anything he wouldn't even look at me because he didn't care" it was for the best" he would say "we weren't even ready" ... but maybe I was. So I managed to move out to my friends apartment by next month however his landlord didn't approve of me living there due to the contract they had signed so I moved back with him, things we're never the same but I managed to save again and this time I did move out , like 5 months later. I was offered a small house at an affordable prize by an exclassmate, so the time came I told him I had found a house and was moving out, he got very upset and almost cried I felt really bad at the time because I thought I had hurt his feelings so I then said... "this doesn't mean we are breaking up it's just that I need my space and so do my cats" so he then said "So you are still leaving if I don't leave with you?" and I said Yes... he then decided to move out of his mom's house and move into the house I started to rent... he brokeup with me 1 month later . After I told him that he had to help me around the house if he was not going to help me financially (although he had a job) he brokeup with me by the next day after he came back from work "because I was too good for him, that I deserved better" and he never returned and I never did either, I was done. But got stuck in the Ni Ti Loop of so "I do everything and practically destroyed myself and that's still not good enough??" and I tried dating and it was like the same person but different physical, they all said the same thing.... that I am too good, and its men older or younger than me. It's so frustrating to feel that you are too much and not enough at the same time. So I gave up, I am tired of trying. Life is just going to get even harder if I overcome this because that is how life works, better off just killing myself than to keep on with this struggle. But that little voice inside of me wanted to understand myself on Why does this happen to me? why I shouldn't kill myself? I am into astrology and spirituality but that was not enough for me at this point so I started investigating about personality types turns out I am and INFJ and there are a lot of people like me that have similar stories and people on RUclips that are providing eye opening content like you. Thank you, today is a brand new day, a new beginning for me. Thank you for saving my life with this 26:03 minute long video. Blessed be 🌹✨
Glad you're still with us. Hang in there. It's always darkest before the dawn.
I seriously learned so much about myself since discovering your channel again thank you so much! I love you hair and eyes : )
Incredible! The entire fabric of my life just started to realign and make sense. TY!!
Currently going through this at my work. We just got a new employee that is very stubborn and older than me. I am the manager and try to get him to do what I want for the sake of the company and have had difficulty so I assumed I needed to understand him better. I can tell I'm not getting though, in the fact the opposite is happening because I think he can tell I'm not being as straight forward I as I want to be and come off phony. While some more understanding might be helpful the more important thing is to be less afraid of confrontation and direct about what needs to happen. Time to tap into my FE more! Thanks for another amazing video, always hitting topics i need to work on!
You got this Joel! You are his supervisor so set the tone. He has to be one to plays by your rules, and if you feel mean, so be it....this is just your mind playing a trick on you...because he is the one being disrespectful
@@Wenzes Thanks Wenzes! This last week went so much better. Just being aware of the problem can make such a big difference and your video definitely brought it to my attention.
This was so helpful. You said “ .....this is the holy grail” . Yes , yes it was for me to lol. I needed to recognize this . I’ve been blind to it . Thank you so much 🤗💜
Glad it was helpful!
Been stuck for 4 years 🤯. Finally getting out.
You are a genius who is gifted beyond words. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and living your truth. You are an inspiration and are radically going to change the world for many and especially for the hero archetype that is the INFJ.
This is SO informative, and helpful! EXCELLENT explanation, and countermeasures! Thank you, for covering this critical topic!
1st of all, your eyebrows look amazing. 2nd, this video, much like everyone else's reaction has completely blown my mind. I feel liberated in the sense of finally putting into words where I have been stuck on and off for years. Some of the best moments of my life are when I get into the Fe (2014, 2016) and that's when I truly felt authentically me. Nice to feel a weight lifted.
Thank you!!
I showed up to work as myself in Friday and in a couple stressful situations I gave my point of view and it turned out well. I’m hoping this is a beginning to getting out of this Ni Ti loop I’m in because I am climbing out of a mental rock bottom. Thank you for your videos
WOW right on Sister! I will lay awake all night ranting IN my head, but the moment I WRITE IT OUT, my loop just disappears, especially if I READ IT ALOUD! I think using my SOUND SENSE lets another part of my brain process it. ALSO MUSIC REALLY HELPS shift me out of my MOOD. Others here also suggest WALKING OUTSIDE! Walking forces us to get back in touch with a GREAT WIDE WORLD and out of our HEADS and experience life TRU OUR BODY. But in the end you are right that we have to FINALLY LET GO OF CARING ABOUT IF OTHERS NEED/LOVE/APPRECIATE our LIFE or WORK, because WE HAVE TO ACCEPT OURSELVES. This can be like asking ourselves to do MAGIC TRICKS and very very DIFFICULT because we have to start LIVING from the OUTSIDE rather than DROWNING WITHIN. The MIND IS A TRAP and some answer come from JUST LIVING and EXPERIENCING THE WORLD without THOUGHTS! Think about a person making pottery, then JUST FEEL THRU IT, they DONT THINK but just ACT, experiencing LIFE DIRECTLY MAKING OUR OWN DREAMS COME TRUE
Omg!!!! This!!!! Ugh. Everything about this is so true for me. I love and appreciate your deep understanding of INFJ's . Your work is so necessary for us . 🙏🏼❤️👌🏼
I have heared each word u said,
This is amazing really.
You expressed the things soo deeply. It answered most of my question.
The other AMAZING discovery you share is that WE REBUILD OUR EMOTIONAL FOUNDATION FROM THE INSIDE OUT! it is like our hearts are hanging dangerously outside of our ribcage. Because we absorb the world emotionally, we are knocked around a lot by the toxicity outside of us. So we have to take our SHARP BRILLIANT AWARENESS and TURN IT INWARD and DECIDE WHAT WE WANT TO FEEL FIRST before STEPPING OUTSIDE. WE HAVE TO TAKE OUR HEART BACK INTO OUR BODY and TAKE CARE OF OUR FEELINGS AND OUR NEEDS FIRST.! This is the hardest challenge of my life, how to CREATE MYSELF just for me ALONE rather than ALL MY MEANING & VALUE coming from HELPING OTHERS!
Thank you for creating this video! You have been able to articulate the interpersonal growth I’ve been working on for the last several years. I feel like right now I’m in the middle of fully grasping the concept of leaning into my FE as my strength. Owning it and trying to show up as my authentic self, no matter where I am in life. It’s still a work in progress but at the end of the day I feel like my determination to make it feel more natural is getting more solid. This video really helped me take in more information so my Ni-Ti loop could take a break. I will say I am always trying to take in more information to help create Fe so the Ni-Ti loop happens quite a bit but I’ve been very good at recognizing it happening. My new trick is “hmmm, I’ll come back to that” and move on with my day in order to create less of the emotional drama that comes with it naturally.
Anyway, thanks again :) I’ve recently discovered your channel and I absolutely love the content.
A single stars light doesn't dim the light of other starts
Thank you for sharing your vision!! What you say is so empowering! ❤️
My pleasure! Glad i can help 😊❤️
Thank you for this video Wezes! I am new to your channel and just starting to dig in to your vast library of videos. This one has already taught me something fresh about being an INFJ. I new about my Jungian stack but had not watched or read about this particular Ni Ti loop we get into. I grew up with no knowledge of MBTI. But we are what others call "ruminators". But for us, we often don't know how to stop.
Thank you ❤ - from korea 🇰🇷
I feel so motivated now, you gave me so much hope. Thanks for helping me get excited about life again. I really appreciate your help.
Thankyou so much for this video. Ive been so stuck and needed this. So incredibly enlightening. - Love from an INFJ
I noticed this recently when four people were hired from the post office for a customer service position. They worked in the warehouse they had a culture that was backstabbing drama, bullying, intimidating and they came to this beautiful atmosphere and brought that with them One of the employees had already worked with us and he was beautiful, kind and thoughtful until these people came and then he became because he didn't want to be seen as an outsider by them, become one of them.
It made it very uncomfortable for me on multiple occasions. I realized that there was something else bothering me. It wasn't simply their Rapport. It was something else I couldn't identify.
It finally came up with the understanding that they all were alcoholics. I can't be around alcoholics.
I'm an Al-Anon and it's very uncomfortable for me so. I have been The Observer. And it shocked me to do that. I couldn't figure out why was I being The Observer and not the engager but because of that dissonance I had to be in order to complete my work.
It also happened with another woman at one point she has left. She was also either into drugs or alcohol or both but I had such immediate disdain for this person and I didn't have any identify viable information about it but I was correct the on both cases.
I am correct I stand tall. It has become a culture that I don't fit into because of this exterior condition that they engage in which of course I have no control over except for possibly leaving the job because there's more of them than there is of me. Or having a miserable time everyday I work. This is so helpful thank you so much
This is sooo good. Thanks for the valuable information
Glad it's beneficial Matt. Thanks for the feedback :)
Is this why i typed earlier that i felt like i was inna way learning stuff and techniques i already used to go through a healing process.... but i feel like ima redoing it over and over again.... 🤠 Different folk same strokes
I wish you good luck Wenzes! 🍀🍀🍀🍀
Same to you Phoenix, thank you 😊
Wow... you're videos are awesome. You understand me more than I understand myself. Lol
sounds like a cool experiemnt ... or a wash cycle that never ends
Thank you Wenzes for making us understand the concept
What a gut punch (in a good way!) Thank you!!!!
We are depressed because we are resisting our intuition. We know it clearly too thus double trouble..
We being scardy cat 🐈 😝
I'm in a loop because I stay in shit jobs/people that don't treat me well because I need the money. I'm an artist and for me all jobs are draining my energy.
Start small but start marketing your art. Find a way how this can create money for you. Work on you Money Mindset. Very often we feel like we can't make money by doing what we love but it is possible...it is all mindset.
Start for example with one of the books from Denise Duffield Thomas...(or join the Bootcamp, there too we talk about your passion and generating income from it so you can quit the jobs that are draining your energy, and to start valuing your art more)
@@Wenzes Wenzes I'm workin right now at marketing my art, creating more, and my mindset. I'm in extremes, I know that I can totally do it (I read tons of books/videos/did inner work etc. in the last years), but then I lose hope because I feel the progress is too small or it takes too long.. so I feel stuck in the loop. I heard about "Lucky bitch", I'll check the books! Thank you for responding! 💜
It will take long but that is okay...and if you fall back, you get back up...the time will pass anyway so use the time building on your vision. On top, you will start feeling great the moment you commit to fight for yourself and not stop ever...that is the biggest reward, that is where the fulfillment really comes from...becoming a person who fights for herself
@@Wenzes That is so true!! And when I have a few days in a row that I really work on my dreams, it feels veeery fulfilling and I feel the flow. I think I have to be totally commited daily, so I keep that momentum longer, and start getting easier!! Thank you, I just got some clarity by talking to you 💜💜
Thankyou.
Thanks!
Very powerful video, thank you!
So glad!
Thank you for this! I needed this. Super helpful.
You explain MBTI like is 100% accurate😂 and people and personalities are not evolving and changing😅. I spent lots of time studying , reading almost all the books on MBTI and took lots of test. Every time during past 10 years I had different results? I got ISFJ. INFJ. ISTJ. INTJ. INTP. ISFP. ( maybe today circumstances makes me an INFJ , but for sure 10 years ago I was a ISTJ 😮)Can you explain why , dear “INFJ coach”?
Thank you so much for this. I really needed it.💞
Thank you Wenzes for this video. It makes sense
👍😊
I wonder how trauma affects this loop. I feel that I am pretty effective at expressing my true self, as I’m in middle age, and have been working through this stuff for a while, but when something very traumatic occurs, it throws a real wrench into the progress. Complex post traumatic stress has its own profile, and its own requirements. It is easy to mix the trauma and the “you” together and get confused. So when the loop occurs in this scenario, I have yet to find a book, video and definitely not a therapist who seems to understand how to help with this. Do you know that I went to a couple of therapists when I experienced a severe trauma, assuming I could use the extra support. They both told me that I seemed to have a grasp on things and that they didn’t think they had anything to help me. Like, that was not the thing I needed to hear, I guess. You’d like to think, when you feel like you are sinking, that something can give you a hand, to help keep you afloat, until you get back on your feet, just a temporary hand.
Same for me with PTSD, same useless therapists moving me up the chain to a psychiatrist who said I was fine then back to social workers who insist on toxic medication that does not cure a brain disorder that literally loops into flashbacks! The medical world realized that it is your brain trapped in painful loops, so the way out of traumautic triggers is USING OUR PHYSICAL SENSES to CALM THE BODY and shift out of ALARMS and into our PARASYMPATHEIC NERVOUS SYSTEM which REPAIRS & DIGESTS (why eating helps and why eating disorders are so epidemic in modern world)
So here are my cures, LOOK UP
EMDR
eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy, it is just moving your eyes back and forth to process trauma with your frontal lobe, IT WORKS!
CALMING OUR BODY IS VITAL
WATCH ASMR whispering RUclips VIDEOS that use specific repetitive sounds to calm the BODYS NERVOUS SYSTEM (find your favorites, each person has some sounds they like and others they dont, like hair brushing or tapping)
CHECK OUT TAPPING on face/wrists called EFT emotional freedom technique
USE POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS everyday like before meals like a prayer, cheesy yes, but they work to reduce self hate or fearful or raging thoughts
SOFT GENTLE EXERCISE EVERY DAY,, stretching yoga, dance to music, and walking DONT OVER EXERCISE because TRAUMA prevents muscle repair and long term physical exhaustion CREATES PAINFUL FIBROMYALGIA which is scar tissue.
Please consider eating AN APPLE A DAY with MAGNESIUM and B VITAMINS because it helps expel toxins from TRAUMA and RELAXES MUSCLES!
REMOVE ALL STRESS from your life, as much as you can, including FAMILY TRIGGERS, SOCIAL EVENTS, TV SHOWS, DRUGS OR ALCOHOL AND junk FOOD DYES, MSG AND Less CAFFEINE, eat more VEGGIE SOUP, throw a bag of frozen soup into a can of chicken soup, its a miracle cure for sleep.
and TRY TO CREATE A CALM SAFE BEDROOM where you can MEDITATE before bed just by COUNTING YOUR BREATH IN AND OUT and SLEEP!
Anything that triggers our adrenalin system iincluding chocolate, sugar and chemicals will RETRIGGER HIGH ALERT PTSD TRAUMA.
The only way to heal PTSD is to ALLOW THE MIND-HEART-BODY to feel SAFE again enough TO RECOVER, otherwise, the loop remains.
And as far as being an INFJ, we live BACKWARD ALL EXPOSED TO THE WORLD turned inside out and have to learn to TURN OUR HEARTS INSIDE and PUSH EVERYONE ELSES NEEDS OUT, because as adults we are alone and have to care for ourselves. This part is the hardest challenge, to make our own lives instead of making lives for others.
I wish you the best and hope one of these techniques can help you find some peace.
Thanks for the reminder!
this was incredible! and so so useful! i love you!!!
Thanks for the comments to shorten this way to long video up.
Our 3rd function is actually our worst function, not our 4th. You KNOW your 4th function is bad. But you THINK your 3rd function is good and it's not.
Totally!!!
Very true. Very VERY true.
Thank you so much!
Since I am also an ASPIE, it is hard...... okay scratch that, it is very difficult for me to recognize nonverbal Communications and nonverbal cues. I struggle with this almost all the time. There are also numerous other things that I struggle with as well, just because I'm an infj/ ASPIE.
Oh my gosh I love this!
pleasure to meet - be gentle boys -
yea holy grail sums up the vid. thanks.
Dun dun dun dun.....14:37 you got me lol
But do others get a blank slate of mind in social gathering when your Se is low? Like too much time was spent in your Ti and now you don't know how to interact?
I think it‘s like this for everyone when you are not used to a certain situation. We all have to adapt first
Have you done a video on INFJ and bosses? Would love to see it if you have. Thanks! 😀
so basically "stop overthinking!!!"
Brutal
Thank you so much 💖
Thank you 🙏🏻
thank you 🥺❤️
❤️😊❤️
Woa😲💡💡💡
Ni Ti ,....what you know about that
Well… damn. Got some work to do.
Thank you Twin 😏
Tertiary is pronounced ter'-she-air-ee
Could someone please explain the part where she talks about the part of self that you don't share with others and keeping a "front" on to protect yourself?
From what I got the message seems to be to not allow your deepest most sentimental and emotional feelings to show to others? To keep a stable baseline on the go in every environment? What's an example of the extroverted sensing being used?
About audio quality: there is annoying echo, maybe consider trying better microphone or have some audio guys to clear the background echo noise from audio track. That way headset/headphone users would be happier and it will be more enjoyable to listen to your voice as well as absorb information easier
Yeah, I am not happy with it either. I have an external mic...but maybe I should start using one attached to my shirt
Is there anyone who gets stuck in NiTi loops (regarding past regrets/future worries) as a default mechanism to calm Fi anxiety? I find myself drifting into the loops regularly and it is stressful to fight against it, eventhough I know it's wasting time because it doesn't really prepare me for anything
OK i under stand a loot of what you are saying at my age how can i show up for me,i know i am a good person but i have cut a lot of people because i am been taken for granted. by friends and family.so at this point in my life I am very alone, if i can make a change while the world is sick.
How can I use Fe in any kind of task situation?
New to your channel. I’m trying to follow but you’re moving too fast between points
I think I know who you talking about. there was this guy that referenced me as Gabe (gay abe) we know his little niche market. by insights the guy got away at every turn. I couldnt locate his tresspass. But after insult 5 dolar bill was given to me paid me back. I didn't risk any karma of being paid back by wrong source. so I gave the guy 4 dollars 3 quaters 2 dimes and a nickle. to be sure by karma status and symbolic tangible world he was not going to be paid back the same way. More over did I warn him. 750 7/05/1980 is also the birth date of building and he lives in it. I warned him of others that would curse the day of my birth if it was that bad, he was living in the same building. so I have my ways to safe guard interests with all the irony of things
Told you I'm not a program but a human being so quit with your initialization loop....as really makes me wonder if you are all programs which means you need to move onto the next sequence in your programming or, Inversely, be human beings back to me
💙🤩
Example just asked an online contact to take a personality test. He balked. I'm holding out. He's very needy. Too much interest lol. He's not going to available for 2 years due to contract out of country. What is interesting about that lol? Next.
This is such a Ti heavy video, my Te is reviewing every flaw to your arguments in rebellion, there's no consideration INFJ's Ti being wrong or flawed, sure it's a subjective function, but still it's so limiting to base everything on that one point of view. What if INFJ are overpleasing with Fe because they feel insecure, the other person notices that and mentions it because it is making them feel uncomfortable and also because they want the INFJ to be able to feel free of the need to please, but INFJ just keep pleasing more and more (overbearing Fe) as a consequence because of their own insecurities until there comes a point where the Ni-Ti loop activates and INFJ are trying to find the logic of why and how to fix it... "I'm being so nice and it's not working, oh it must be the other person's fault", flawed logic instead of accepting it might actually be their own doing. Then the flawed logic is imposed on the other person, who was honest from the start and at this point suffering incessant questioning, looking for absolute coherence, reviewing every single aspect of the other persons behaviour. There's no self growth in this system if Fe is always the solution. And depending on Fi critic (what the INFJ really wants and being able to express it) to get you out of the sticky situation is a lot to ask for... Going on walks, enjoying life and engaging positive Se sounds like a much healthier solution. Sorry if I am not right, the NI-Ti loop is difficult to deal with and I am trying to understand and propose a different approach to help.
Why the heck do you change the distance to/from the camera all the time? This makes it terrible to watch. Is this some fancy thing you have heard to be cool? Please stop it!
INFJ, sigma