As a senior gay man myself, I must tell you that you are a very wise, kind and special young man. Wish there were more like you in presenting to the world the fine example of what so many gay people are. In other words, the positive imagine that you represent for us is very much appreciated. Thank you.
Like Rainbow Dreamer I'm a senior gay man. They only thing I would add is that when I was your age I never dreamed or even imagined that I would ever see a young man do what you have just done. It just was not possible for so very many years.
@@garystone2863 yes this is how a platform should be used for, helping others and I seen other RUclipsrs do this and I can't help but to comment and be happy and grateful for them because not many people will spent money and help others...
@@garystone2863 Things have definitely changed a lot in the last 50 years or so. However, THIS young man would be a true rarity at anytime that has ever been. Maybe in another 50 or 100 years, the average gay man MIGHT have half the wisdom of Zack. We need guys like this.
Zach, my friend, you do not give yourself enough credit. Your courage in sharing such an intimate and emotionally painful milestone from your past as a cautionary tale for some and an assurance to others that they are not alone in their experience has done more good than you will ever know. Those big brown eyes do not lie when they say, "The sweetest soul lives in here." After a week if freezing Texas darkness, you brought us all a warm heart and the light of a truly kind spirit. Hope you and your man recover fully. You two have been sorely missed.
What’s great about this channel is Zach is so honest and genuine and self-deprecating. He speaks for a lot of us. And that laugh is the icing on the cake. Great guy.
Zack, I absolutely adore you. Thank you for being willing to be vulnerable with your audience about topics like this what so many people relate to yet is so rarely talked about openly. You are such an amazing man and just a shining example of strength, compassion, and unconditional support to the world around you.
In general, you both are one of my favorite gay male You Tube channels, because you present your full selves, not just a story or a "story book" version of your lives. I relate to you both and I'm grateful to your online presence. Be well guys!
I was raised Southern Baptist & I felt guilty as well. However, I noticed that when i fooled around with a guy that I had feelings for there was no guilt. I was raised to believe sex outside of marriage was wrong period. I guess that bothered most. I was able to reconcile my religious beliefs with being gay. I'm now a Presbyterian, proud to be gay and wouldn't change it if i could. I still regret the pointless "hookups." I'm just glad there were only a few. I'm a commitment type of guy. This is an excellent video. I have many straight friends and was surpised to learn how often they had sex in rooms filled with people when they were young.
Hey Mike, I was raised in Arkansas as a Presbyterian! And I can’t relate more, it took so long, painful, and depressing struggle for me to realize that I had no guilt when I realized I was bisexual. I finally suddenly realized that the God I know would never hate or reject me for who I am no matter what. And I refuse to believe otherwise. I’m kind of non denominational now but I’m still absolutely a Christian! I believe He made me exactly how he wanted
Zach there is a reason why majority of your audience are gay men is because including me you have saved our lives not just me but every other LGBTQ person in your audience you have changed our lives for the better
I get that , but like he doesn't have to get all the credit for the work of others. They are plenty of LGBT+ youtuber with tons of subscriber who do exactly like him and more. I'm not saying that he's doing bs thing , I'm just saying that making him the ''REASON'' why majority of people do that or that is kind of exaggerated.@@toddsmith1969
OMFG! You're human. But you're a freaking GREAT person. You understand your impact and even though this is a topic that is SO VERY uncomfortable for you - you try very hard to put that horrid past behind you to speak about a topic that is not easy to discuss so your viewers can be better people and to help those who need it also get thru some uncomfortable and scary things. I'm VERY happy you and Allistair found each other. Y'all fit together like a puzzle. It's wonderful to see. Ty VM for putting your fears, trauma, and past behind you to help others. I hope in some way it also was therapeutic and helpful to you to push thru it. ❤️❤️
This is one of THE most raw and open videos I think I’ve ever seen you do. I can really hear the emotion and uncomfortable feelings in your voice. Love your openness my friend and appreciate you sharing so much of you with us. You got a beautiful soul brother. 😊
Coming from the part of your audience that is straight women, so much of this applied to me. Thank you for sharing! Sex with my husband is magical...sex with my ex was used as abuse and my husband has taught me to how to love that side of life! 💚
All of this yes! Finding the trust to be intimate with someoone is a huge step to make and sadly many people don't have the level of knowledge to make an educated decision. I'm in the UK, where our sexual education is not brilliant but seems to be miles better than in other parts of the world and especially from what I've heard from friends in America.
I wish I could have had a conversation like this 30 years ago, but it was a different time back then. Thank you Zach for sharing. So eloquently spoken and articulate.
Zac, as one of your more mature followers (old enough to be your father) I applaud your youthful insight. So much of what you talked about I could so relate to: cultural, religious, etc. I do enjoy watching you and Allister and only wish you a continued happy, fruitful relationship. Thanks for reminding me of what was, and what can be.
@@SethHanLee @rey ke Trust me, one day you will just feel the urge and need to YELL at the top of your voice and tell everyone what type of love you prefer. Love is love. I hope that you will come out when YOU are ready, not when others tell you to come out or when TikTok tells you to come out. Yes it is important to come out and it would be great to have an accepting family, but it can be beneficial to come out when you feel most comfortable. You got this, I know some may say that "Omg my parents are so accepting, you should just come out!" but in reality, that isn't always the case. If you don't believe your parents are accepting and would put restrictions/restrict your life in any way, it may be better to wait until you are 100% ready. (I don't know how old you are, you may be 10,11,15,16,18, 20, 25,28, but I just gave the best I could). Love is Love, Nate :)
I greatly admire your compassion and honesty. I am still way behind with being honest with myself, let alone my family. Your videos give me hope and encouragement. Thank you. Bless you.
@@timcamp2030 Of course its for schools to teach sex ed. A lot of parents simply aren’t gonna do it, and we can’t leave those children vulnerable to predators just because they’re unlucky enough to have those parents.
Loving these Zach, your method of presenting, especially this topic is so on-point and clear. Communication - such a important skill that is very difficult for many. Thx!
I enjoy watching your videos. I love to listen to you talk, with that deep voice, and Texas accent. I've admired the relationship that you and Alistair have. I'm 58, and just came out to my family 3 weeks ago. Everyone has been supportive, and said for me to do what makes me happy. I hope to someday have what ya'll have. I've waited this long. A little longer want hurt me.
Your candor and willingness to disclose what you have here is so much to be admired. You are thoughtful and clearly sensitive to the emotions and vulnerabilities in sexual situations. What a wonderful man you are. Bravo, Zach!!!
Thank you for your openness and honesty. First time experiences are rough and it's great to know that you went through the same thing that many of us have also gone through. Thanks for your posts. I have been watching for a long time and look forward to every post.
I have to praise you for this message, because it’s so important! I too had some very awful things happen to me growing up, and I wish not only were the internet around then, but that there was a platform like RUclips around then. Because of those things that happened to me, I feel uncomfortable with sex. I’ve gotten better over the years but that feeling is still there. Giving consent and accepting consent is the most important thing, because if someone is ok to begin with and then they change their mind it’s important to accept that and not force something to happen when the other person doesn’t want it. It’s also important to know that if someone says no they mean exactly that, no. It’s not up for debate, no means no! I think you’ve come a long way Zach since those things because I can see it. It takes time, strength, courage, and nerve to persevere! Thank you again for sharing this!
A few times during foreplay I've had to say no I'm uncomfortable w this right now and every time but one they stopped. The guy that didnt stop had me shackled and cuffed to the top n bottom of the bed frame. I still have scars from that on my body. He was big and no lube no condom and he hurt me bad. I later found out he had HIV too. When I found out I did also and it came from him, I tried hiring a lawyer but I couldn't find anyone to take my case. Yes consent is everything!
@@ryanblack844 I’m sorry this happened to you! I hope that you were able to get counseling because i didn’t until it was almost too late, i attempted suicide many times as well as using illegal drugs that i had overdosed on numerous times, let’s just that for the amount of years i was using, the countless overdoses im thankful and blessed to be alive! As I was growing up I was psychologically, physically and sexually abused by a family member from the age of 8 and continued for 7 years. This person was also a deputy sheriff so I felt I had no one to report it to that would believe me over them. They also at times would force me at gun point! No one helped me at all even when the truth was out in the open. I had an eerily similar situation happen to me that you did. This was my 3rd male sexual partner were not really dating per se more like FWB type of situation. He too had HIV and didn’t tell me, he always up until that final time was gentle and would wear a condom but for some reason took it off mid way and he was already inside me before I realized it was off! He was also not gentle that time and he hurt me really bad and wouldn’t stop when I told him too. Basically because of my history I froze and became numb it was more or less like I was having an out-of-body experience. I didn’t find out until 10years later that I was HIV positive, I knew it was him because I hadn’t had any sexual partners since him. Honey when I say I was f’g pissed...!! Long story short, I tried to call him, he must’ve changed his number or something, I too tried to file a complaint but no one would do anything becase the statute of limitations had expired. Something needs to change in our legal system so that the statute of limitations for sexual assault cases does not expire!
You are amazing to be so honest and open about these experiences. I love that you've really thought about each one and have taken the time to know yourself. I admire you.
Zach, Glad you fellas are ok. Everyone has their time and whether we want to remember, it happens. Mine was forcefully rape too young. I survived to tell others that life can come back to be better. I have had other times that were great and not so great. That is life. I am just looking to find a life partner to settle down with and spend the rest of my life sharing, loving, caring and just being together. This world is crazy. I am working to take care of my mom, work a fulltime job and deal with the drama. Time for the drama to go bye bye. 2021 IS going to be better. You stated you have been absent but you did a fine job on this video. You haven't lost your touch. See you on the next ones. As for those out there suffering due to the weather. Hang tough and remember who your friends are. We have your backs when those that don't help you are in your face wanting your help. Stand strong. 2021 is time to make those changes. You know you are loved here!
This was actually a great video with excellent advice. We've all been in different but relatable moments. It's great being able to speak about them and be honest because it can actually impact and help lots of people out there.
The candor you offer in your videos is admirable. I think most of us aspire to be that way, but fall short for one reason or another. Clearly it is a quality that makes you so endearing to so many people. I can't help but wonder how much of it comes easily to you, versus how much of it requires heavy lifting behind the scenes on your part to be so. Either way, the end-result is awesome.
It was such a treat to see your new vlog pop up. Don't worry about how often you produce content.....take your time and move at your own pace. The wait is always worth it.
This was the Zach I love so much. You have the courage I want so badly. So many of my friends would be shocked by that statement cause they say I'm so outspoken, but that is rarely the case when it comes to my private life. One note: Bottoming is often considered submissive, but you can make it a dominant act. Don't look at it as someone doing something to you, but that you are allowing someone to be that intimate with you.
@@AdventuresofZachandB Zach, as an older gay man I knew exactly what you meant and applaud you for believing in yourself & being honest about it, it's sad that we as humans can't be accepted for the people we are due to many many stances, I know this is an older video but I hope things are going great for you guys, much love to you both from Arkansas!
Zach, you're a brave guy! I hope you'll continue to create more videos about Alastair and you as time goes by. Whatever you share is genuinely appreciated by everyone who watches, I'm sure! My partner and I were together for 40 years until he died in 2015---
Zach thank you for your candor. It is very refreshing and quite rare for anyone to walk through life without a mask on. So many folks have built such a narrative or legend for themselves that they can't live outside of the projection that they've carefully crafted for the world.
Great video Zach! It's been a while since you've done a "sit and talk" vid. Nice to see that it still works. Stay safe, stay warm. We have one more night of freeze here in Houston.
Thank you for sharing. I liked seeing the vulnerability and you articulating your truth, as well as you were able to. This kind of real talk is helpful for people trying to understand the ACTUAL world around us and not the IMAGE of what we would like see, so THANK YOU for the honesty.
This video was so amazing, stories around consent with men are still too few and this was a welcomed addition to the landscape. Sorry to hear you guys got COVID-19 but I do hope you are both fully recovered. Looking forward to all you share this year.
What a beautiful soul you are. Every word made perfect sense. And it takes a strong soul to get past the childhood trauma and God. Love is love. Bless you.
You are 💯correct! HUMAN COMPASSION is most definitely LACKING!!!! I am a Nurse and I see it every day! I am from Minnesota! HUGS TO THE BOTH OF YOU!!!❤️🙏♥️💯If I can be of any help, PLEASE let me know! Sincerely, Joey😊
Wow. What a brave video to share. Communication is key and developing positive body imaging that allows you the confidence to say no to an uncomfortable situation.
Zach my first time is something that has always been on my mind for the reason that I wasn’t okay with it. Just like you, I felt like I needed to please the person. I was such a people pleaser even if it was hurting me mentally.
I appreciate your honesty and your willingness to talk about things like this that others very often won’t talk about. Sex can be a very fraught subject, so approaching it forthrightly and with sensitivity is very much appreciated.
I thought would never figure out what is going on here if I do not watch the whole thread from four years ago, so, there I go watching by date from last one on forward but finally I realize IT DOES NOT MATTER. I can jump in between this four years of posting and the answers are in each video. Each one is a reflexión of your soul, very rear to find.
As soon as I leaned of the storms, I thought of you guys, sincerely concerned for you . You are such a "down to earth" guy. You tell the truth, you have a great deal of compassion and understanding for and with the human family. You have the creativity and courage to share the good stuff of your heart. I have watched you for years, and the communication between you and Alistair is great. I can see you help each other and grow in your "mutuality." Be well good people....
It is sad to hear about the rest of Texas. I am living in El Paso and didn’t get impacted like the rest of Texas but my family down South Texas did. It sucked that I couldn’t do anything for them but give them advice on what they need to load up on and keep warm. They didn’t have any power or water for almost 3 days. I don’t like living so far away from family. Stay safe everyone stay warm.
Go Zach, Go. Your public speaking has improved with every post! TRUST, UNDERSTANDING and COMMUNICATION!!! The basis of long and supportive relationships. I hope you both recover without any lasting complications, many will not.
I miss these videos... Glad you did this one.... Of course I couldn't wait to hear this one especially with the title.... You just tell you are an amazing man by the way you present yourself and your personality
Zach you are a true inspiration to not just gay men but to all people. I'm proud of who you are and all of your accomplishments. I really enjoy your videos and am happy you have a wonderful husband in Alastair. I love your accent, you are attractive but most important you have a great personality and are a lot of fun to watch. Enjoy watching you from the great state of OREGON. Go Ducks!
I’ve been in a situation where I was with a very older guy and he got mad when I wanted to stop. He told me that he didn’t want to leave my place and that “not everyone will be as nice.” It was an uncomfortable situation.
@@AdventuresofZachandB Thank you! We really look forward to it! It is nice seeing young gay men leading much more normal lives than we had the opportunity and in a way we live our gay youths through you!
Thank you for all your words Zach. I’m honestly a complicated person talking about sex, and for me is not so natural and enjoyable to have sex. Reinforce the message of not doing what you don’t really want to do is a great advice we all should remember.
I partially came out. With all my friends and my sister. I'm happy to be who I and who I feel. I don't need to tell it everybody but to whom are my loved ones only. The important is to come out to feel free.
these are really good pieces of advice...to say no and respect when someone else says no...no matter the situation...I had to grow up alot to learn to say no...wish I would have known that was an option when I was a young boy.
Praying for all of those who are cold and hungry. People need to reach out and help. Sending you and Allistair warm hugs. Glad to see you online again Zach.
I'm sorry you had to go through that kind of guilt when you were younger I too had a similar kind of guilt growing up with a Catholic family I'm finally out though to myself and most of the ones I care about. Also glad you and Alistair are feeling better.
Wow. You continue to be amazing, was smiling the whole time. Happy you and baby boy or big daddy 😂is doing well. Aside from the message, The arms and shoulder were it. 😝 Alastair you got a real one well happy you found each other.
I hear ya buddy. I have OCD myself . Have to count to 10 , three times myself . Lol . Having Allister be patience with you in getting thru the uncomfortable times is one of the advantages of you guys being married . Great, honest video.
Thank you for you videos that you have made. Having to be in Chicago, we as well had a lot of snow and we are dealing with it. I do how that people in Texas are taken care during this crazy winter. Again, I hope you and your husband are safe.
This senior gay couple is so immensely proud of our new generations. Had to look up what DM meant though. As my husband asked, "Why can't these Kids use fucking words?" Love.
Love your strength and how real you are. You are not alone - in ANY of your experiences. You are a role model for many people who are struggling with their sexuality and all circumstances that impact or compound the same. You’re amazing.
As a senior gay man myself, I must tell you that you are a very wise, kind and special young man. Wish there were more like you in presenting to the world the fine example of what so many gay people are. In other words, the positive imagine that you represent for us is very much appreciated. Thank you.
Like Rainbow Dreamer I'm a senior gay man. They only thing I would add is that when I was your age I never dreamed or even imagined that I would ever see a young man do what you have just done. It just was not possible for so very many years.
@@garystone2863 yes this is how a platform should be used for, helping others and I seen other RUclipsrs do this and I can't help but to comment and be happy and grateful for them because not many people will spent money and help others...
Well said I agree 100%.
@@garystone2863 Things have definitely changed a lot in the last 50 years or so. However, THIS young man would be a true rarity at anytime that has ever been. Maybe in another 50 or 100 years, the average gay man MIGHT have half the wisdom of Zack. We need guys like this.
Totally agree!
Zach, my friend, you do not give yourself enough credit. Your courage in sharing such an intimate and emotionally painful milestone from your past as a cautionary tale for some and an assurance to others that they are not alone in their experience has done more good than you will ever know. Those big brown eyes do not lie when they say, "The sweetest soul lives in here." After a week if freezing Texas darkness, you brought us all a warm heart and the light of a truly kind spirit. Hope you and your man recover fully. You two have been sorely missed.
Your channel is the reason why I recently was able to come out to my friends and family. I can't thank you guys enough
Congratulations 🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈
Congrats 🎉🎉👏👏💥🥳🥳
Other people are truly an inspiration! A TV show character helped me accept myself and come out 😅
What’s great about this channel is Zach is so honest and genuine and self-deprecating. He speaks for a lot of us. And that laugh is the icing on the cake. Great guy.
The thing I love the most about you is that you're open, you don't push stuff on people, you are just about people being comfortable and happy.
Love the sheer honesty and the sensitive, thoughtful way you deliver it. You’re a good man. ❤️
Zack, I absolutely adore you. Thank you for being willing to be vulnerable with your audience about topics like this what so many people relate to yet is so rarely talked about openly. You are such an amazing man and just a shining example of strength, compassion, and unconditional support to the world around you.
In general, you both are one of my favorite gay male You Tube channels, because you present your full selves, not just a story or a "story book" version of your lives. I relate to you both and I'm grateful to your online presence. Be well guys!
I was raised Southern Baptist & I felt guilty as well. However, I noticed that when i fooled around with a guy that I had feelings for there was no guilt. I was raised to believe sex outside of marriage was wrong period. I guess that bothered most. I was able to reconcile my religious beliefs with being gay. I'm now a Presbyterian, proud to be gay and wouldn't change it if i could. I still regret the pointless "hookups." I'm just glad there were only a few. I'm a commitment type of guy. This is an excellent video. I have many straight friends and was surpised to learn how often they had sex in rooms filled with people when they were young.
Hey Mike, I was raised in Arkansas as a Presbyterian! And I can’t relate more, it took so long, painful, and depressing struggle for me to realize that I had no guilt when I realized I was bisexual. I finally suddenly realized that the God I know would never hate or reject me for who I am no matter what. And I refuse to believe otherwise. I’m kind of non denominational now but I’m still absolutely a Christian! I believe He made me exactly how he wanted
Zach there is a reason why majority of your audience are gay men is because including me you have saved our lives not just me but every other LGBTQ person in your audience you have changed our lives for the better
I’m just here to look at him.
Saved our lives? 😆 ,,,,
@@garysimmons1485 maybe look at the suicide rate of lgbtq people RUclipsrs usually help a lot
@@garysimmons1485suicide is a huge problem in the lgbt community
I get that , but like he doesn't have to get all the credit for the work of others. They are plenty of LGBT+ youtuber with tons of subscriber who do exactly like him and more. I'm not saying that he's doing bs thing , I'm just saying that making him the ''REASON'' why majority of people do that or that is kind of exaggerated.@@toddsmith1969
OMFG! You're human. But you're a freaking GREAT person. You understand your impact and even though this is a topic that is SO VERY uncomfortable for you - you try very hard to put that horrid past behind you to speak about a topic that is not easy to discuss so your viewers can be better people and to help those who need it also get thru some uncomfortable and scary things. I'm VERY happy you and Allistair found each other. Y'all fit together like a puzzle. It's wonderful to see. Ty VM for putting your fears, trauma, and past behind you to help others. I hope in some way it also was therapeutic and helpful to you to push thru it. ❤️❤️
This is one of THE most raw and open videos I think I’ve ever seen you do. I can really hear the emotion and uncomfortable feelings in your voice. Love your openness my friend and appreciate you sharing so much of you with us. You got a beautiful soul brother. 😊
mmm raw
I’m writing this down. Real men discuss consent, being gentle, comfort, communication and submission with sincerity and positivity. Got it.
Coming from the part of your audience that is straight women, so much of this applied to me. Thank you for sharing! Sex with my husband is magical...sex with my ex was used as abuse and my husband has taught me to how to love that side of life! 💚
We’re so grateful having such great allies like yourself
All of this yes! Finding the trust to be intimate with someoone is a huge step to make and sadly many people don't have the level of knowledge to make an educated decision. I'm in the UK, where our sexual education is not brilliant but seems to be miles better than in other parts of the world and especially from what I've heard from friends in America.
I wish I could have had a conversation like this 30 years ago, but it was a different time back then. Thank you Zach for sharing. So eloquently spoken and articulate.
Zac, as one of your more mature followers (old enough to be your father) I applaud your youthful insight. So much of what you talked about I could so relate to: cultural, religious, etc. I do enjoy watching you and Allister and only wish you a continued happy, fruitful relationship. Thanks for reminding me of what was, and what can be.
I actually came out to my parents as gay they were really accepting and understanding and they said they already knew before I even knew
Aww that's great😄
This is cool. I hope I can do it like you, but I cannot speak out about my homosexuality because they will kill me.
@@reyke1573 same. I'll do it in my 30s
some moms know that from the moment the baby is born...
@@SethHanLee @rey ke Trust me, one day you will just feel the urge and need to YELL at the top of your voice and tell everyone what type of love you prefer. Love is love. I hope that you will come out when YOU are ready, not when others tell you to come out or when TikTok tells you to come out. Yes it is important to come out and it would be great to have an accepting family, but it can be beneficial to come out when you feel most comfortable. You got this, I know some may say that "Omg my parents are so accepting, you should just come out!" but in reality, that isn't always the case. If you don't believe your parents are accepting and would put restrictions/restrict your life in any way, it may be better to wait until you are 100% ready. (I don't know how old you are, you may be 10,11,15,16,18, 20, 25,28, but I just gave the best I could).
Love is Love,
Nate :)
Thanks Zach for sharing your story and for being a decent, caring individual. You are a credit to the LGBTQ community, both you and Alastair.
I greatly admire your compassion and honesty. I am still way behind with being honest with myself, let alone my family. Your videos give me hope and encouragement. Thank you. Bless you.
Zach, so honest, genuine, and down to earth. Much appreciated.
Any see the title and just automatically grab the popcorn or is it just me....
🍿
Me too. Quickly finished what I had to do, got comfortable, and tapped go.👍
"... grab the popcorn"? Yes, it's just you. What? Wait, don't kill me! ;-P
No popcorn is bad for your teeth
I saw his video online...before Allister...big 🍆 and hairy...no popcorn needed though...lol
I love this kind content when you just talk to us! Also love you and your strength! Stay safe down there ❤️
I hope you and Alastair get over CoVID soon. I'm glad to hear both of you are doing well in the Texas winter storm. Please stay warm and safe.
Imagine how much better off we'd all be if these types of open conversations happened in the education system 👀
Or even comfortably in the home. My folks never spoke to me about this stuff haha
@@AdventuresofZachandB same here, unfortunately!
I taught for 29 years and wish we could have been that open. He did a great job!
@@tylerandtodd School isn't about teaching sex ed. That's for your parents to do. Lots of predators in schools
@@timcamp2030 Of course its for schools to teach sex ed. A lot of parents simply aren’t gonna do it, and we can’t leave those children vulnerable to predators just because they’re unlucky enough to have those parents.
Loving these Zach, your method of presenting, especially this topic is so on-point and clear. Communication - such a important skill that is very difficult for many. Thx!
I enjoy watching your videos. I love to listen to you talk, with that deep voice, and Texas accent. I've admired the relationship that you and Alistair have. I'm 58, and just came out to my family 3 weeks ago. Everyone has been supportive, and said for me to do what makes me happy. I hope to someday have what ya'll have. I've waited this long. A little longer want hurt me.
Your candor and willingness to disclose what you have here is so much to be admired. You are thoughtful and clearly sensitive to the emotions and vulnerabilities in sexual situations. What a wonderful man you are. Bravo, Zach!!!
Thank you for your openness and honesty. First time experiences are rough and it's great to know that you went through the same thing that many of us have also gone through. Thanks for your posts. I have been watching for a long time and look forward to every post.
I have to praise you for this message, because it’s so important! I too had some very awful things happen to me growing up, and I wish not only were the internet around then, but that there was a platform like RUclips around then. Because of those things that happened to me, I feel uncomfortable with sex. I’ve gotten better over the years but that feeling is still there. Giving consent and accepting consent is the most important thing, because if someone is ok to begin with and then they change their mind it’s important to accept that and not force something to happen when the other person doesn’t want it. It’s also important to know that if someone says no they mean exactly that, no. It’s not up for debate, no means no! I think you’ve come a long way Zach since those things because I can see it. It takes time, strength, courage, and nerve to persevere! Thank you again for sharing this!
A few times during foreplay I've had to say no I'm uncomfortable w this right now and every time but one they stopped. The guy that didnt stop had me shackled and cuffed to the top n bottom of the bed frame. I still have scars from that on my body. He was big and no lube no condom and he hurt me bad. I later found out he had HIV too. When I found out I did also and it came from him, I tried hiring a lawyer but I couldn't find anyone to take my case. Yes consent is everything!
@@ryanblack844 I’m sorry this happened to you! I hope that you were able to get counseling because i didn’t until it was almost too late, i attempted suicide many times as well as using illegal drugs that i had overdosed on numerous times, let’s just that for the amount of years i was using, the countless overdoses im thankful and blessed to be alive! As I was growing up I was psychologically, physically and sexually abused by a family member from the age of 8 and continued for 7 years. This person was also a deputy sheriff so I felt I had no one to report it to that would believe me over them. They also at times would force me at gun point! No one helped me at all even when the truth was out in the open. I had an eerily similar situation happen to me that you did. This was my 3rd male sexual partner were not really dating per se more like FWB type of situation. He too had HIV and didn’t tell me, he always up until that final time was gentle and would wear a condom but for some reason took it off mid way and he was already inside me before I realized it was off! He was also not gentle that time and he hurt me really bad and wouldn’t stop when I told him too. Basically because of my history I froze and became numb it was more or less like I was having an out-of-body experience. I didn’t find out until 10years later that I was HIV positive, I knew it was him because I hadn’t had any sexual partners since him. Honey when I say I was f’g pissed...!! Long story short, I tried to call him, he must’ve changed his number or something, I too tried to file a complaint but no one would do anything becase the statute of limitations had expired. Something needs to change in our legal system so that the statute of limitations for sexual assault cases does not expire!
You are amazing to be so honest and open about these experiences. I love that you've really thought about each one and have taken the time to know yourself. I admire you.
I really admire the way open and honest about your life. Love your channel man!
Zach, Glad you fellas are ok. Everyone has their time and whether we want to remember, it happens. Mine was forcefully rape too young. I survived to tell others that life can come back to be better. I have had other times that were great and not so great. That is life. I am just looking to find a life partner to settle down with and spend the rest of my life sharing, loving, caring and just being together. This world is crazy. I am working to take care of my mom, work a fulltime job and deal with the drama. Time for the drama to go bye bye. 2021 IS going to be better. You stated you have been absent but you did a fine job on this video. You haven't lost your touch. See you on the next ones.
As for those out there suffering due to the weather. Hang tough and remember who your friends are. We have your backs when those that don't help you are in your face wanting your help. Stand strong. 2021 is time to make those changes. You know you are loved here!
This was actually a great video with excellent advice. We've all been in different but relatable moments. It's great being able to speak about them and be honest because it can actually impact and help lots of people out there.
Man, you are so vulnerable forthright and sincere here - it’s a beautiful thing. What a great guy you are. I enjoy seeing anything you have to say.
The candor you offer in your videos is admirable. I think most of us aspire to be that way, but fall short for one reason or another. Clearly it is a quality that makes you so endearing to so many people. I can't help but wonder how much of it comes easily to you, versus how much of it requires heavy lifting behind the scenes on your part to be so. Either way, the end-result is awesome.
What a great video. There are many of us who are recovering Catholics. You, my friend, are clearly full of divinity. Continue to share it!
It was such a treat to see your new vlog pop up. Don't worry about how often you produce content.....take your time and move at your own pace. The wait is always worth it.
I loved hearing about how loving and gentle you and Alistair are with each other. So sweet.
Thank you Zach. So honest and truthful. Take care and be safe.
This was the Zach I love so much. You have the courage I want so badly. So many of my friends would be shocked by that statement cause they say I'm so outspoken, but that is rarely the case when it comes to my private life. One note: Bottoming is often considered submissive, but you can make it a dominant act. Don't look at it as someone doing something to you, but that you are allowing someone to be that intimate with you.
Agreed. When I mention being submissive, I don’t tie it to bottoming, just being submissive. Should have been more clear there
@@AdventuresofZachandB
Zach, as an older gay man I knew exactly what you meant and applaud you for believing in yourself & being honest about it, it's sad that we as humans can't be accepted for the people we are due to many many stances, I know this is an older video but I hope things are going great for you guys, much love to you both from Arkansas!
Thank you for sharing! Glad to see you again, Zach!
I wish I could have heard that 38 years ago. Thank you for your honesty and openness.
Zach, you're a brave guy! I hope you'll continue to create more videos about Alastair and you as time goes by. Whatever you share is genuinely appreciated by everyone who watches, I'm sure! My partner and I were together for 40 years until he died in 2015---
Thanks for sharing your story. Especially, the mental health aspect and consent. How it’s affected things and how to healthily approach those things.
What an amazing fella you are Zach. Such honestly and humanity.
You've gotta commend this kind of vulnerability. We're all better for it when someone has the courage to be open about their experiences.
YOU DID SO GOOD!! Love you all and thank you for sharing!!
Zach thank you for your candor. It is very refreshing and quite rare for anyone to walk through life without a mask on. So many folks have built such a narrative or legend for themselves that they can't live outside of the projection that they've carefully crafted for the world.
Great video Zach! It's been a while since you've done a "sit and talk" vid. Nice to see that it still works. Stay safe, stay warm. We have one more night of freeze here in Houston.
Thank you for sharing. I liked seeing the vulnerability and you articulating your truth, as well as you were able to. This kind of real talk is helpful for people trying to understand the ACTUAL world around us and not the IMAGE of what we would like see, so THANK YOU for the honesty.
You are adorable, genuine, and wise beyond your years
Beautifully spoken and very tasteful on every level.
This video was so amazing, stories around consent with men are still too few and this was a welcomed addition to the landscape. Sorry to hear you guys got COVID-19 but I do hope you are both fully recovered. Looking forward to all you share this year.
What a beautiful soul you are. Every word made perfect sense. And it takes a strong soul to get past the childhood trauma and God. Love is love. Bless you.
You are 💯correct! HUMAN COMPASSION is most definitely LACKING!!!! I am a Nurse and I see it every day! I am from Minnesota! HUGS TO THE BOTH OF YOU!!!❤️🙏♥️💯If I can be of any help, PLEASE let me know! Sincerely, Joey😊
Wow. What a brave video to share. Communication is key and developing positive body imaging that allows you the confidence to say no to an uncomfortable situation.
You’re a good man, Zach. Thanks for everything, bro!
I am a straight female and to me knowledge is power. So I am finding this vlog very interesting. I wish nothing but the best for you and your husband.
Zach my first time is something that has always been on my mind for the reason that I wasn’t okay with it. Just like you, I felt like I needed to please the person. I was such a people pleaser even if it was hurting me mentally.
I appreciate your honesty and your willingness to talk about things like this that others very often won’t talk about. Sex can be a very fraught subject, so approaching it forthrightly and with sensitivity is very much appreciated.
I think your story times are your best videos! Have a great weekend
I thought would never figure out what is going on here if I do not watch the whole thread from four years ago, so, there I go watching by date from last one on forward but finally I realize IT DOES NOT MATTER. I can jump in between this four years of posting and the answers are in each video. Each one is a reflexión of your soul, very rear to find.
Nice job Zach. Awkward subject but you handled it with a sensitive touch. Bravo!
As soon as I leaned of the storms, I thought of you guys, sincerely concerned for you . You are such a "down to earth" guy. You tell the truth, you have a great deal of compassion and understanding for and with the human family. You have the creativity and courage to share the good stuff of your heart. I have watched you for years, and the communication between you and Alistair is great. I can see you help each other and grow in your "mutuality." Be well good people....
Thanks for responding, you have always impressed me with the beauty of your "soul." You are both rare soulmates.
It is sad to hear about the rest of Texas. I am living in El Paso and didn’t get impacted like the rest of Texas but my family down South Texas did. It sucked that I couldn’t do anything for them but give them advice on what they need to load up on and keep warm. They didn’t have any power or water for almost 3 days. I don’t like living so far away from family. Stay safe everyone stay warm.
You are sweet 🥺
Thank you for existing and being you 💖
Best to you and your lovely husband
Go Zach, Go. Your public speaking has improved with every post!
TRUST, UNDERSTANDING and COMMUNICATION!!!
The basis of long and supportive relationships.
I hope you both recover without any lasting complications, many will not.
I miss these videos... Glad you did this one.... Of course I couldn't wait to hear this one especially with the title....
You just tell you are an amazing man by the way you present yourself and your personality
Hope to see more of you this year Zac and Allistair! You guys are great and fun to watch!
Zach you are a true inspiration to not just gay men but to all people. I'm proud of who you are and all of your accomplishments. I really enjoy your videos and am happy you have a wonderful husband in Alastair. I love your accent, you are attractive but most important you have a great personality and are a lot of fun to watch. Enjoy watching you from the great state of OREGON.
Go Ducks!
My favorite gay couple! You guys rock!!!
Recently discovered your videos of you and Alistair. I'm hooked!! I enjoy everything you put out...and you guys are real about your relationship.
I’ve been in a situation where I was with a very older guy and he got mad when I wanted to stop. He told me that he didn’t want to leave my place and that “not everyone will be as nice.” It was an uncomfortable situation.
Just wanted to say I finally came out to my dad after 7 yrs and ur guys videos helped me alot up until this point keep up the awesome videos
After being with my husband for 10 years and being a wild child from 16-30 I agree the BEST is with someone you know, trust, and love.
You guys are wise beyond your years. Thanks for helping those looking for these answers, especially the youth.
Wish you would do videos more regularly. You guys were like nephews we see weekly.
The plan is to get into 2-3 times a month. I'm working on it haha
@@AdventuresofZachandB Thank you! We really look forward to it! It is nice seeing young gay men leading much more normal lives than we had the opportunity and in a way we live our gay youths through you!
You're too hard on yourself Zac! You are loved!!
I love these guys. They are so sweet. Thanks boys! Zach and Alastair are the best!! Thanks for your honesty and frankness Zach. XOXO Stay well boys!
One of the best first time video. Thank you for being so awesome.
Omg religious ocd! That is such a good term! I was definitely like that for a good part of my life
Soooooooooo GLAD you opened up about this subject
Thank you for all your words Zach. I’m honestly a complicated person talking about sex, and for me is not so natural and enjoyable to have sex. Reinforce the message of not doing what you don’t really want to do is a great advice we all should remember.
I partially came out. With all my friends and my sister. I'm happy to be who I and who I feel. I don't need to tell it everybody but to whom are my loved ones only. The important is to come out to feel free.
I missed you guys
Thank you for your honesty and sincerity, very sweet.
Great advice Z. Glad you found yer forever man! Love ya'll
You are so kind and compassionate. Thanks
these are really good pieces of advice...to say no and respect when someone else says no...no matter the situation...I had to grow up alot to learn to say no...wish I would have known that was an option when I was a young boy.
Praying for all of those who are cold and hungry. People need to reach out and help. Sending you and Allistair warm hugs. Glad to see you online again Zach.
I'm sorry you had to go through that kind of guilt when you were younger I too had a similar kind of guilt growing up with a Catholic family I'm finally out though to myself and most of the ones I care about. Also glad you and Alistair are feeling better.
I'm so happy I accidently found your site. You're just nice. Just an honest nice guy. I wish you well!
I never get tired to say: I LOVE THIS CHANNEL!
Wow. You continue to be amazing, was smiling the whole time. Happy you and baby boy or big daddy 😂is doing well. Aside from the message, The arms and shoulder were it. 😝 Alastair you got a real one well happy you found each other.
Hope you and Alastsir and the dog's and all your families are doing well.
I hear ya buddy. I have OCD myself . Have to count to 10 , three times myself . Lol . Having Allister be patience with you in getting thru the uncomfortable times is one of the advantages of you guys being married . Great, honest video.
We miss your videos so much.. your voice is so soothing♥️.. Team Kenya🇰🇪🇰🇪♥️♥️
Thank you for you videos that you have made. Having to be in Chicago, we as well had a lot of snow and we are dealing with it. I do how that people in Texas are taken care during this crazy winter. Again, I hope you and your husband are safe.
This senior gay couple is so immensely proud of our new generations. Had to look up what DM meant though. As my husband asked, "Why can't these Kids use fucking words?" Love.
Love your strength and how real you are. You are not alone - in ANY of your experiences. You are a role model for many people who are struggling with their sexuality and all circumstances that impact or compound the same. You’re amazing.