WHY AFRICAN FIRSTBORN DAUGHTERS ARE DOOMED😭😒

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  • Опубликовано: 13 сен 2024

Комментарии • 51

  • @Annonymight
    @Annonymight Месяц назад +85

    I am the only daughter of 7... at this point, I've decided to pretend like I'm completely incompetent. I give nonsense, childish advice, I can't cook, I'm not consistent with appointments, I'm broke and allegic to dish/laundry water. They think I'm useless and lean on my brothers, I'm ok with that.

  • @jadedlulz
    @jadedlulz Месяц назад +38

    I was a victim of this particular issue. I am a second child but first daughter. My mother coerced me into marrying a complete waste of sp*rm. The last 13 years of my life was every shade of nightmare on Elm Street.

    • @urmomdotcom4039
      @urmomdotcom4039 Месяц назад

      I'm so sorry 💔 praying for you 🙏🏽💛

  • @rubigee4397
    @rubigee4397 28 дней назад +15

    This holds true in the Latino community too. I may be the youngest of my siblings, but I’m the only daughter. I was filling out paperwork, making phones calls & writing letters for my parents since I was in junior high school.

    • @mskabue
      @mskabue  28 дней назад +2

      Thank you for confirming this is also true for the Latino community

  • @Carameldamour
    @Carameldamour Месяц назад +44

    Dont succumb to the pressures. They just want you to marry fast to Bragg among their friends or pay back for all their friends kidz wedding they were invited to😂😂😂😂. Don't do it.

  • @Ngozi09
    @Ngozi09 Месяц назад +35

    3rd daughter here from Nigerian parents. Both my older sisters are gay. The pressure for me to get married and have babies is crazy. I just got into my first relationship and I’m already being asked when I’m getting married. The problem with my mom is that (even though she denies it) she looks at all her friend’s children getting married and having kids while hers are traveling and working. Thank god I have tough skin because I really don’t care. See y’all on my next flight😭

    • @mskabue
      @mskabue  Месяц назад +3

      😂😂👋love you girl....

  • @Lokaluna7956
    @Lokaluna7956 28 дней назад +10

    I don't care for their expectations. Gods plan and will for my life will prevail ❤️🙏🏾 Amen

  • @Blue-ew9tf
    @Blue-ew9tf 29 дней назад +9

    All of this !!!! Sometimes we get discarded after doing the job. It is so tiring how parents/relatives treat us. It's crazy.

  • @LOVELYLONDONGURL
    @LOVELYLONDONGURL 28 дней назад +11

    Parentification ✅. Then gaslighting ✅. I’m not even the first born daughter but can still resonate.

    • @mskabue
      @mskabue  28 дней назад +2

      Exactly 💯

  • @IAmTired163
    @IAmTired163 26 дней назад +6

    First girl is literally me. My parents were and still are good people but my aunties were not. They called me ugly when I was 6 years old. Now I’m called a burden to mother because I’m not married. Moving to other country was the best decision ever. I started living after I moved.

    • @mskabue
      @mskabue  25 дней назад +1

      Happy to hear that Sis 😊

  • @kgothatsomampye8503
    @kgothatsomampye8503 Месяц назад +12

    First born African daughter with 6 siblings after me thanks darling for caring about me ❤❤❤

    • @mskabue
      @mskabue  Месяц назад +2

      You are so welcome 🤗 I'm glad my content appealed to you

  • @Lully_tubbies
    @Lully_tubbies Месяц назад +12

    I am not gonna lie this has been the shittiest blessing God has given me so far because the way I have suffered in that household and to top it off both parents being narcissistic, I've really had to put my external life on hold just to heal and undo the patterns and it's taking years and having to be okay with no accountability on their end , being gaslit and now I'm the troublemaker being isolated because I started making demands they've both made it clear that the only relationship I can have with them is one where I'm the doormat and they can step all over me and to top it having a jealous, insecure witch for a mother who's sooo busy subbotaging you while you reverse mirrored her actions and was supportive,kind and caring to a woman who only took,was and is hostile and belittles me and abused me physically, emotionally,financially and verbally .

    • @mskabue
      @mskabue  Месяц назад

      Don't worry I'm rooting for you Sis 💓

    • @Yorubavegan
      @Yorubavegan 28 дней назад

      Same here!
      Rooting for you ❤

  • @jessicatsao92
    @jessicatsao92 29 дней назад +12

    These families will marry their first born daughter to the first homeless drug addict and violent felon they see as long as they can force their daughter to marry at age 12. That is exactly how these abusive families treat their daughters. Unfortunately, African and black families tend to have this problem even more so than other demographics. 😢
    I can affirm this as someone who observed this from a distance consistently with other families, no matter how wealthy they are. And yep, my own narcissistic Chinese family will do likewise with me if they had the legal power to do so.

  • @lifestyleswitneffy
    @lifestyleswitneffy Месяц назад +9

    Same thing parts of the Caribbean 🇭🇹

  • @cebile1493
    @cebile1493 27 дней назад +4

    I'm from South Africa and as a first born daughter I'm expected to be a third parent to all my siblings....

    • @mskabue
      @mskabue  27 дней назад +1

      You got this Sis....when you can please move out it will be a lifesaver

  • @angellove1012
    @angellove1012 Месяц назад +15

    My dad has 5 children I’m the second oldest but I’m the oldest daughter. Let’s just say I’m full of disappointments to my family. I’ve done everything wrong and backwards.

    • @angellove1012
      @angellove1012 Месяц назад +7

      This video explained my whole life.

    • @eyitayobayode6022
      @eyitayobayode6022 Месяц назад +5

      Lmao same 😂😂😂

    • @Annonymight
      @Annonymight Месяц назад +9

      @@angellove1012 very similar..I'm not a doctor, I'm not married, have no children and don't plan to have any and I use hello fresh...my grandma is paying that whatever shackles that are restricting my life be dismantled 😶

    • @Enas_Playhouse
      @Enas_Playhouse 28 дней назад +3

      ​@@Annonymight🤣

    • @shamanoftruth4699
      @shamanoftruth4699 28 дней назад +4

      Proud to disappoint them 😂😂😂
      Career, ASEXUAL 🌈, Childfree, and marriage free🎉

  • @digimonalvatrax2738
    @digimonalvatrax2738 28 дней назад +4

    My mom suffered...and therefore I did not. Thou she does talk to me with her work dramas.😂

  • @PeaceIrene254
    @PeaceIrene254 Месяц назад +7

    I love your content and today i commented because whuee!!!

    • @mskabue
      @mskabue  Месяц назад +3

      🤣🤣thankyou I'm glad you enjoyed

  • @Cko7676
    @Cko7676 7 дней назад

    7:30 it always surprises me that other people experience, it's comforting but sad at the same time going through it with other people who outgrew their parents at an early age and parent still are immature not taking accountability.

  • @preciouslyunhinged
    @preciouslyunhinged Месяц назад +2

    This is too accurate...am a firstborn daughter, basically 3rd parents, carry my mum.trauma and gaslighting. Narcissist behaviour in my father and low key resent my brother after me (bse they were lenient on him and hard on me and he ended up acting like an adolescent at 22) and to that I decided to drop the fights and being un unpaid therapist and I literally gave up.on them emotionally bse at the end of the day It drains me and am not appreciated and I decided less communication .oh and I have had 4 arguments with my father bse i said I didn't want to get married at all, and I don't want to meet a boi like him(oop)😂

  • @florahnemaorani3492
    @florahnemaorani3492 25 дней назад +2

    I am the first born South african daughter, and what a curse........I don't even talk to my family , I dislike my parents, and I honestly want nothing to do with my family. The only person I tolerate is my little sister ........begin a first born left me traumatized for life . And it's actually not funny for most of us as we struggle with relationships........ So, the term of first born african daughter should be " African Scapegoat daughter."
    That's what you became as a first born african daughter. The experimental child.....The struggle child.....the oppsy....I made a mistake child. I think we africans need to take a hard look at ourselves and households.

    • @mskabue
      @mskabue  25 дней назад

      So sorry for what you've had to go through. You're absolutely right💯....going forward we Africans should do things totally differently

  • @geminate3997
    @geminate3997 29 дней назад +2

    My mother is American and she is the same mother in as she expects so much and gaslights

  • @MysoulSaysyes-fy6wc
    @MysoulSaysyes-fy6wc Месяц назад +2

    Congratulamalations😂😂😂😂❤❤❤

    • @mskabue
      @mskabue  28 дней назад +1

      She got me too😂😂

  • @Okebraids
    @Okebraids 4 дня назад

    Some African parents are selfish and toxic. Period

  • @tamekadavis6641
    @tamekadavis6641 Месяц назад +4

    Omg ! I thought the first born daughter has it easy.

    • @mskabue
      @mskabue  Месяц назад +12

      They have it the hardest babe

    • @angellove1012
      @angellove1012 Месяц назад +6

      Definitely have it the hardest

    • @tamekadavis6641
      @tamekadavis6641 Месяц назад +1

      For some people maybe 🤷