@@juliachan8421 Relentless Woman is a Facebook community group! The focus is being a woman after God's heart! I'm not sure if they have a book or not- from what I know they don't.
I have a certain shape, so I try to refrain from wearing tight things. I started to cover up, and it's sad to say this, but people respect you more, because they see you respecting yourself.
Same here! I don't really feel comfortable in pants that show my butt and upper thighs either, since I have somewhat of a shape (not really though) 😅 And I don't know about you other women, but I've gotten too many sexy comments thrown at me from guys, and even had guys try to grab me on multiple occasions whilst wearing normal jeans. Some guys have even thrown remarks at me whilst wearing sweatpants and a really long jacket! So there's that aspect of wearing modest clothes too :) So even if you're wearing modest clothes you can still receive crude remarks etc, but I absolutely agree that we shouldn't cause our brother or sister to stumble by wearing revealing clothes 😊
There’s definitely a difference in admiring someone’s body and lusting after them. For example, I can look at a girls face and admire it, or even her body. Doesn’t mean I lust after her. Same thing for guys with nice biceps, I can see them and think they’re nice without going further than that. Being attracted to the other sex isn’t a bad thing, it’s what you do with that attraction
So true. Many times I have seen someone and thought "wow, God has blessed your face" (or whatever) and then I need to walk away. If I don't, then I sin.
True. This just means you're stronger than some people. People who have lust addictions can stumble easily. It may not be your fault, but I think we should do our best to make sure we're not the stumbling block people trip on Romans 14:13
I really like that you say that you don't know everything. It is so important that christians are honest about what the bible really says about certain topics and to not make things up that probably aren't true. Thanks for that.
one thing I heard that has stuck with me through the years is "your clothes should be tight enough to show that you're a woman but loose enough to show that you're a lady." And it has helped me find that balance like sutton's comment of "it's not saying you need to dress like a slob" etc.
*The idea of "modesty" is a joke. God created us to be fully nude with NO SHAME and it was only when we started playing our own game that we started viewing our bodies as disgraceful. Most clothing has nothing to do with trying to be sexy, it's just the individual wearing what makes them comfortable. Clothing doesn't influence bad actions, character does.*
I LOVE THIS VIDEO!! The only thing I'd like to add is: If you're trying to be modest and men/women still look at you lustfully, that is not your fault and you can't control others. Unfortunately sometimes women will wear clothing that isn't revealing and still get sexually harassed or worse. It can be a source of shame and sometimes the church doesn't do a great job at helping them through that. So if you are truly doing what you can to try and prevent others from stumbling, but they choose to lust after you or treat you inappropriately, I believe God honors your efforts and I'm sorry if others sometimes don't. (coming from someone who was sexually harassed at youth group a couple of times when wearing modest clothing!)
Lindsey Meig I can relate I’ll be honest I’ve got a thing for Chris brown he could wear a paper bag and I’m still looking period. So I can completely understand I think it’s a mindset
Another cool POV is that modesty isn’t just in how you dress, but how you treat people, approach different situations and talk in general. Such as when you get mad how you react and so forth. Loved the video 🥳
Jahvon Bowers yes and faith you have to believe in it to act on it otherwise it means nothing. Same with modesty, belief that how you act is important can help you and motivate you.
I used to judge other women for wearing bikinis, but have come to realise that I was jealous of their bodies and was actually judging them to make myself feel better. I've had anorexia in the past and am sometimes uncomfortable in my body, and if I were ever to wear a bikini it would come from a place of accepting the body God gave me, not from trying to attract attention. The intention behind clothing is so important! I wear leggings to dance rehearsals because they're comfy and flexible, not because I'm trying to look 'sexy', but I would personally never wear low-cut tops in public because they don't feel classy to me and would attract unwanted attention. Thanks for starting this conversation you guys
I have recently worn a bikini for similar reasons. I do not have an eating disorder but it is complicated and I've had other trauma. I left the church I was raised in at 30 yrs and it has been 2 years since I came off prescribed benzodiazepines. I wear one sometimes to accept my body too. 💕💕 I'll keep you in my prayers I'm glad you commented this
I’ve been switching over to watching only Christians and churches on RUclips and I don’t have any social media anymore! I found you guys not too long ago and I’ve already watched all your videos! I think you guys are absolutely amazing and so brave talking about hard subjects. They are definitely things people need to be more mindful of! I just want you guys to know how amazing you are and your marriage has given me a lot of hope that I will find a God focused husband some day:)
I totally agree, watching Christian RUclipsrs has been so helpful for me to stay reminded that there are Christians who are here to help support when it seems everyone is going out and living worldy.
I have done that too. I will still watch secular RUclips once and awhile, but I cannot subscribe to non Christian channels. Been doing this for a year now and it's been great!!
The thing I have a hard time with....people lust after others even when we are totally covered up. At what point do we just have to say enough and hold the viewer accountable for their own thoughts?
@@jackjones3657 I agree. But that often doesn't seem to be what people tend to imply with the modesty message. It comes across as it being our duty to stop other people's sins. As you said, only God can do that. Of course I agree that the way we dress sends a certain message, I am just not fond of the way that is explained in many Christian circles. If that makes sense.
Anna, its good you are mindful of what you wear, at least you have done your part, however, if others are still lusting after you even if your covered up, its no longer your job, it is now their problem and they clearly have a lust issue and need deliverance, so this is very different and they need to seek God on this. Ps: men also need to be mindful of how they dress, if they are shirtless or wearing tanks that is just as sinful, they cant override Gods standards and they will be accoutable for their actions and false teachings.
I personally really liked how you guys talked about modesty for BOTH guys and gals. Most people I have listened to who talk about modesty only focus on the girls - saying they have to cover up etc, and it's basically completely their job to stop guys lusting after them. But it does go both ways and I think everyone needs to be mindful of this! Yes people need to be careful of what they wear, but also on controlling those thoughts, like ya'll touched on in the video
I think for guys, a big thing with modesty is more about how they act and talk. I believe that guys know ways to make a girl lustful by their tone of voice, how close they stand, what they talk about
Also true, but I think that goes for girls too... if girls are acting overly flirtatious I think it can have an affect on guys too. Yes, guys are very heavily stimulated by looks alone, but attitudes and mannerisms can cause guys to stumble too. So women, please cover up for our sake to glorify God. Men, lead by example and do the same. Men, do not act in a way that would cause a women to feel tempted towards lusting after you. Women, please know that this can affect guys too and refrain from being overly flirtatious.
I ask my husband if what I am wearing is modest and vice versa. If he feels that I am wearing something that would draw attention to me in a negative way he lets me know. I also let him know. Because what man wants another man looking lustfully at his wife and what wife wants another woman looking lustfully at her husband.
Agreed, especially among God focused or moral people! In a worldly aspect though some people might want to do that because they feel validated or of higher value if people are jealous to have/be with their spouse. Kind of a my spouse is better than your spouse thing.
My husband does NOT control me. If you go back and read my comment you will see that both my husband and I tell each other if what we are wearing is just a bit too much. Has nothing to do with controlling but respecting each other. Now that is how we personally make our clothing decisions.
You guy’s videos are so refreshing in today’s day and age. I decided to stop wearing bikinis a couple of years ago, when I thought of it as being the same as my underwear. Only the fabric is different. So then I thought: Well I wouldn’t want anyone to see me in my underwear, but a bikini is accepted, even though it’s the same thing. I want to save my body for my future husband to be seen. I just wear board shorts and a T-shirt now. I feel much more comfortable in that. Not sharing this to judge. :) Just sharing my experience. Thanks for putting out these videos!
I have said this exact same thing, and I wear board shorts and a tshirt as well! It was so encouraging to read your comment and to know there are other ladies out there with the same mindset!
I think as we grow in our relationship with Christ and with others, modesty comes with that. When you care about yourself, God, and others when making decisions, and allow the Holy Spirit to guide you, you will do the right thing. I try not to follow the world's standards. It really does matter what you look at to guide you.
Jam I agree but I think you also have to think about the people who didn’t grow up with your same mindset. What if their modest isn’t your modest then what? That’s what I run into a lot. How do you approach that situation if that other person thinks it’s okay???
@@BG-pr1rx Thanks for your comment. It is a cultural thing too. Environment and setting is also a factor. If someone makes you feel uncomfortable, I would talk with them about it. Share your feelings and expectations and allow the person to share as well. You can learn a lot about the person and that dialog is what can be most helpful.
My general rule is asking myself: Am I causing someone else to stumble into lust? Am I honoring my husband & body being appropriately covered? Dress as though I’m spending the day with Jesus. 🙏🏾
Nate and Sutton, this was so wonderful...I cannot wait to see "Modesty Part 2." (Smile). Some of my favorite key points were: 1. What God says about a matter and knowing the true intent of our hearts are paramount. 2. Personal conviction or lack thereof is not a reliable guide for a modesty standard. 3. Iron sharpens iron, (we need others to help us see what we cannot see) 4. It's okay to say, "I don't know, but I will try to find out."
I really appreciate your perspective on this. I love that you focused on thinking more about the heart and the mindset, rather than setting out specific rules we must follow! Thank you, y'all.
Haha you guys are so funny and honest. Really enjoyed your take and dialogue on this topic😄 Morgan and I are in the car listening and every few mins we pause to discuss😁 haha
*The idea of "modesty" is a joke. God created us to be fully nude with NO SHAME and it was only when we started playing our own game that we started viewing our bodies as disgraceful. Most clothing has nothing to do with trying to be sexy, it's just the individual wearing what makes them comfortable. Clothing doesn't influence bad actions, character does.*
I lived in South Sudan for two years and it was immodest to wear pants so i wore skirts but now I live in America and I wear Jeans and shorts with no conviction but in South Sudan I would feel guilty wearing those. A lot depends on culture but of course their are absolute boundaries
As a young, unmarried woman, I get really uncomfortable when guys are shirtless, or wearing tanktops. I don't necessarily lust after them, but I am curious, so I have to try really hard not to look... But maybe that's just me🤷🏼♀️
Not just you. I feel the same. I am pretty uncomfortable when a guy goes shirtless, and sometimes it's so bad I can't talk to them. I just look away. Arms are fine though, but I do think tank tops reveal too much.
Its not you, its a sin.... God will deal with these men, he is a hypocrite, they talk about others on social media posing lustful pics, but they themselves have no issue flaunting their bodies for us in bikini's and shirtless tops... God will deal with them, I too lust over men, and I try not to look, but God will deal with these seducers (men and women).... I too have to try not to look and these men when they are half naked or wearing tight T's, men think that its ok for them to do what they wilt and God will wink at their sins, but men show off just as much of their assets as women do, they will be accountable for making women stumble, I dont care what they say in this video.... they are clearly trying to override Gods word and make ppl feel good in their sin... I actually rebuked this guy months ago because he was parading shirtless and he had an attitude.... Run from wolves... God tells us to test all spirits, many will come in Jesus name and decieve many, we are in the end times, narrow is the road and only few find it....... Ps: Also another thing Jesus showed me... He also walked the earth as an example and he was not topless, men in those days all wore robes, covered from head to toe... it is one thing to learn how to be more modest and have God help you and grow you in that area.... its another thing for a person to be too prideful to be taught what modesty is and teach Gods flock how to sin with them... this is dangerous and just like teaching bad doctrine, they will be accountable for teaching people to sin with our bodies, our bodies belong to the Lord period...
I think modesty starts inwardly and works its way outwardly. A person can have a skirt all the way to the ground and covered all over but still not be modest and humble in her heart. Like wise a guy can cover all the way up but also not be modest inside his heart. If you focus on giving your heart to God. You will naturally be drawn to covering up the way the Holy Spirit wants you to if you listen to his voice.
so if you say you wear tank tops to the gym because you like to see yourself get pumped up... why wouldn't it be okay for a girl or woman to wear leggings to see their leg / glute muscles get pumped up?
Aude 🙌 modesty is wearing things for you and not for others! If you want to see yourself bulk up, you are good! If you want to show others you bulking up, you’re not good! That’s how I view it and t goes for guys and girls.
I have a rule for modesty that I use. It’s the one-piece swimsuit rule: if it doesn’t cover a full piece swimsuit it’s not okay. I also just find clothes that are less modest borderline uncomfortable. Also I LOVE how you guys address both genders!!!!! Much love from Oregon
*The idea of "modesty" is a joke. God created us to be fully nude with NO SHAME and it was only when we started playing our own game that we started viewing our bodies as disgraceful. Most clothing has nothing to do with trying to be sexy, it's just the individual wearing what makes them comfortable. Clothing doesn't influence bad actions, character does.*
Coming from someone who used to struggle with immodesty and always wanted "rules and guidelines" to know if I was right or wrong, I know now that God is not so concerned with what we wear or how we dress. He wants our heart. If immodesty is your struggle, it points you back to a heart issue. I look back on younger me and I wish I could tell myself not to focus so much on what I can get by with without sinning but to focus on seeking God's heart and wanting to please Him. When we seek Him first, then He aligns our hearts with His and changes our heart to not want to dress immodestly Love you and your vids Nate and Sutton😍
Here is an interesting thought: wearing a bikini is the same as, or more revealing than a bra and underwear... This reminds us that we can get used to things. But really, we should be more mindful of how much we are revealing to others. I have even seen people wearing obvious bras at a beach. And I thought sadly, 'Really, what's the difference?'
Lorien Kam so you’re saying that this ( api-romwe.romwe.com/h5/rw_share/romwe_goods_detail/452251?lan=en&site=iosrwus ) swimsuit is supposedly sinful and not super cute? i was planning on buying it for when my mom and i go to the river over summer
@@zeejies9124 An outfit like that, I would happily wear on a romantic night with my husband at home or in an enclosed, secluded area. I think wearing it in public, I wouldn't feel like I'm pleasing God or caring about the weaknesses of others. God bless you!
even though i don’t agree with everything y’all believe, i think you’re such a cute couple and seem like genuinely good people and genuine believers! 💛💛💛
He even mentioned that he didn't previously think about how that could be tempting to women because culture doesn't really talk about it. We're all still learning!
I enjoyed this. Very well said. It’s not about a certain set of rules, rather the idea of blessing God’s heart with the clothes with which you dress. I like this a lot.
Y’all did a great job.. always referring us back to what the heart of God is saying... regarding the issue of modesty for guys .. In my opinion wearing tight jeans is very revealing and should be considered when thinking about pleasing God. I know everyone wants a “guide” to all of these things but I do believe that If your looking to please God He will show you and convict your conscience
As someone who is openly gay and not Christian, I totally relate to your sentiment about modesty. I didn’t realize until recently that my whole life I have been dressing modestly, I just knew it made me feel good. I really do think that the way somebody dresses attracts certain people and I certainly want to attract people who respect me. Thanks for posting this video!
When I know a person is married, I may see they are beautiful, but I won't feel any attraction towards that person, regardless of what they are wearing. I'm sure it was God who created me that way, because I can definitely feel attracted towards single men. I really find it very odd that someone would comment on Nate's shirts being too tight on the arms, is that enough for them to become attracted to him? It sounds silly to me, but to each their own. I'm Portuguese and in the summer it's very natural for guys to be shirtless, our summers can be really hot. I think clothing should be a personal decision based on each person's comfort level, but also on how comfortable would the person be if they kept being stared at for wearing those clothes or for taking them off. If someone feels uncomfortable wearing something, then they shouldn't. If they feel good and it doesn't get them any unwanted attention, then they should wear it as much as they want. Nate's tank tops are extremely common in Portugal, almost all men wear them. I wouldn't consider a tank top to be sexy or attention grabbing, except if it was made of leather or had fishnet or something like that. I think you are modest people who are going an extra mile to make other comfortable and that's incredible. I loved this video so much, I love how genuine you are. Sending Sutton a big hug and sending Nate a Hi5. I miss Oaklan, maybe we could get to see him in the next video? :D
When i got serious with my faith i felt God tugging on me to brighten up my wardrobe and stop wearing so much black. I just ask God daily what should i wear? I was praying a few months ago about changing my wardrobe and next thing you know, i had my mentors (a few ladies from my church) bring me some clothes and they brought a lot! Things i wouldn't pick out but i tried them on and loved all of it! Little by little, i started changing things and i just felt brighter. I felt happier and more content and def felt alot more confident all around! I dress to impress God and its just something that convicts my heart that tells me what i should and shouldn't wear. Amanda Ferguson is great help with this! Highly suggest listening to her videos and some of her Facebook videos on this topic. One video that's really great is on a podcast called single confident women ( regardless if your single) and she shares her thoughts about this topic. She is a proper edicate coach. Its packed with great insight! Another hands down, great video. I feel like I can come here to get wise counsel and good wisdom. I really appreciate all your hard work you both put into these videos! 😇💙 as always praying for all 4 of you!
Ive been hit on in normal workout gear. Why? Because some people are just creepy no matter what. Resisting temptation is a part of life and people need to learn to control themselves regardless of what someone is wearing.
@@rudy1999 while working out it is. I have been hit on after being in the feild for two weeks with only baby wipes for a shower. Some people are just that creepy.
This sparked a great conversation for my husband and I. This year God has really put modesty on our hearts. My husband no longer has his shirt off if he is around anyone but me. So even at the beach. We also live in the South so it can be uncomfortable. He doesn’t wear anything without sleeves even to the gym. He doesn’t wear tight shirts. He doesn’t wear skinny jeans so it’s not so much a problem but he is blessed in the back section so he won’t always tuck his shirt in. He never looks weird or frumpy. We believe that God calls us to yield to your spouse, after God, so if your spouse wants you to dress more modestly than you should. Basically whoever’s idea is the most modest that’s what happens. We believe if you are choosing to honor your spouses wishes for modesty(if it’s more than your own) than you are headed in a good direction in honoring the Lord.
There isn’t anything wrong with being attractive. In the Bible obviously Sarah was attractive because Abraham was scared the Egyptians were going to kill him if they knew she was his wife. I think the word would be when someone is trying to be seductive.
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say it like that. I mean that I'm often more attracted to those who are being themselves. I feel like sometimes people try to win others over by doing things or dressing in a way that they think would be attractive, rather than just being themselves.
I get what you mean personality wise..ppl should be themselves. But it’s fine for ppl to dress up and wear make up, etc. everyone tries to be attractive to a certain extent...do you shower? Brush your hair and teeth?? You know??
This video is so amazing!! God used it to speak to me so much. As a guy, I had never really thought that much about my responsibility to dress modestly. I love working out, so when Nate started talking about how he dressed in the gym, it hit me dead on. I realized that I was dressing to draw the wrong kind of attention to myself. My life's purpose is to point to God, not to draw attention to myself. And worse than that, I was trying to draw impure reactions out of my girlfriend. God used this to convict me so much and completely change my outlook at the gym and in life in general. God has blessed my journey toward modesty so much, and I have had so much more peace and joy since embarking on this journey. Thank you so much Nate and Sutton for speaking the truth boldly and in love!
This is the deepest video I've ever watched on this subject. Just found your channel and watched a few videos. You guys are really blessed with wisdom. Thanks for making these videos and for being an example of what it means to follow Jesus.
I'm a new TRUE Christian and I've been watching your videos all morning, I love it! I feel like I relate to everything you both say. I feel relieved that I'm not alone on my thoughts but also my intuitions seem to be right. I've also recently started going out with another saved Christian who holds the same beliefs as I and I'm so excited. Watching your videos has been an answer to my prayers because I was having doubts but watching you two as a couple gives me inspiration. P.S. I am one of those big butt people LOL soooo, I guess I need to work on my wardrobe! Thanks for the train of thoughts!
You guys deserve so much more subscribers! Thank you for addressing difficult topics and sharing your faith to the world. Please continue doing what you do. Love you both 😊
My thought: My dad always insisted I go out in public looking very nice because he wanted me to present myself in a way that my best personality could shine.
I think we should focus more on teaching everyone "to look at others" with modesty, rather than dressing modestly. You should not feel entitled to look at another person just because they are wearing something revealing. If you go to an African tribe where women are topless, how would you react? Very differently for sure. The thing is if you teach about dressing modestly, then you feel by doing it you are doing something right, while the others who don't are doing something wrong. So when you see it, you judge. I feel like all this mentality just makes it awkward to see the skin when it shouldn't.
No offense but in the Bible, dressing modesty is all about respect for other’s eyes, so the way you see modesty is selfish. When you dress half naked you’re sinning against men and God, you don’t care if the people around you are struggling with sexual lust sin so you dress how you want to dress without a second thought of what other people might think of the way you’re dressing. Women struggle with sexual lust sin too but men struggle with it more because most men are attracted to women and women have more sexual ornaments on their body than men, so that’s why men struggle with sexual lust sin more than women and why the Bible was being specific with women dress code.
Abc Oh Lust and attraction are two different things. Lust is a strong sexual desire while attraction is just attracted to something you find very interest in. I don’t know if you’re a believer and a Christian but a true Godly woman would cover more of her skin up to try to save a soul from lust sin, and a true Godly man would do the same too.
Jahvon Uchiha you are no one to say Im not godly because I dont agree with your sexist way. Learn to control your lust and let me dress how i want. If my intentions are not to cause it, ive done nothing wrong.
I love Nate acknowledging how women stumble and he is considering if he should have your shirt off because yes that is definitely tough for some girls more than others. And boys acting as if they can do whatever isn’t smart through faith
I am a girl with a big butt! I have had struggles my whole life. No matter how modestly I dress, I STILL get comments from guys. I was wearing only long dresses to work. I was a little surprised at the sheer number of guys that would tell me how much they like full figured girls or how much they love a juicy booty. My mom criticized my dress wearing. She asked me “Have you ever seen what you look like from behind? There is no amount of modesty that will hide that booty!” So I do my best to dress modestly, but no matter what I do, I can’t hide my booty.
Personally if a guy is in good shape and not wearing a shirt it can provoke lustful thoughts. I can imagine how the guys feel when we wear revealing clothing. Let's all help each other and try our best to be modest :)
Really great video guys, I agree with everything your talking about with being modest and making sure to think of our brothers in Christ so they don’t fall into sexual thoughts or temptation! 🙌🏼🙏🏼
I think u guys handled this topic so well! You guys both dress modestly but even more than that u guys carry yourselves in such a respectful way and that can also change the way an outfit comes off. Ps. Nate’s shirts are perfectly fine in my opinion. Both beautiful people inside and out.
when i show myself respect, i tell myself that it’s never ever my responsibility to make sure people behave if they feel “tempted” by my clothing. i tell myself that something’s horribly wrong if i need to cover up to be respectfully treated. it makes me sad to think about the people who are being taught that it’s on them to keep others from hurting them. and my heart breaks for the people who have to listen to the question “well, what were you wearing?” in court or at home or with friends or anywhere else
I agree with you! I believe in being modest for both boys and girls. However, I don’t think it’s to protect others from lusting. For me, it’s just a personal thing where I don’t want just anyone to see my body because I believe only my husband should one day be able to fully see it. And the same goes for my future husband. I would hope he is being modest so that I am the only person who fully sees his body one day. Idk if that makes sense but that’s how I view it?
Lust from another person also happens if we dress modest. I believe a great deal falls on our conscience. We must guard our thoughts and hearts and when we do fall, ask God to forgive us and pray for strength in that area. Modesty goes hand in hand with our actions. We can be cover from head to toe but our actions can still cause another to stumble.
So very true. ...we can be covered from head to toe and still cause another to stumble. But we must still give an account to God so it's between each individual person and God to decide whats right for themselves as they try to be mindful of those around them.
One thing that comes to mind is the way having different moral standards for different bodies promotes thin privilege and shaming of people in larger bodies (which is already an issue obviously). How can we set these standards in a way that doesn’t make life more difficult for some people than others and set some people up to be shamed?
Love this video so much. I love having this conversation with people and hearing their opinions, it’s a super tough topic for the church. I believe it’s not one gender’s responsibility but it’s shared, like you guys said. It’s both gender’s responsibility to dress in a way that is honoring to the other and it’s a mutual command to not lust. I personally do also believe that it does come down to each persons convictions. I have a conviction about the length of shorts I wear, but do also wear a bikini to the beach. I think that the type of clothes you wear and the way you present yourself reflects a lot about who you are and your relationship with the Lord. I care more about my relationship with Jesus than how cute my butt could look in “short shorts”. You guys really nailed it on this video and thanks for being careful in your choice of words. Also, thanks for being super real and honest with us about your convictions, amazing. 😘
I never really think about how I look like in clothes or which parts of my body I am showing or covering. I do not follow specific rules here. For me as a Christian, the most important question is where my clothes come from. I could never buy or wear clothes connected to human rights violation, and I am basically referring to the whole fast fashion industry. I think as Christians we have a responsibility to not support those companies and buy fair fashion clothes (and fair products in general!) instead. I am convinced that God is more interested in how we live and behave (also regarding our behavior of buying and consuming) than how we look like.
Thank you so much for sharing this video! Modesty is something I’ve been studying for a while now and I love hearing other Christian outlooks on the topic. Y’all are such an encouragement!
Something interesting I have always scratched my head at: Swimsuits and stomachs. Seriously. I remember going to Bible camp when I was a young teen and having to wear a one piece or tankini. I actually felt more uncomfortable with what was acceptable as “modest” because it fit in that swimsuit category. I always preferred bikinis - ones with high coverage bottoms and higher coverage, sports bra style tops. They covered so much more than the high cut hips and low cut tops of one pieces and tankinis that were deemed acceptable because bellies were covered. It’s somehow become more modest for bellies to be covered than actual butts/boobs, while guys wear swim trunks and show off everything else.
@@Living4YHWH show me the verse where the Bible says to cover from your shoulders to you knees. Somehow I've read the Bible and never come across it...
Lol I am very curvy and I sing In church, anytime I wear something that might be modest to me but not to the church 😂😂😂, they pull me aside and tell me. But those who are not curvy be wearing the same thing and are not told anything. 😂😂😂
Nana Adwoa Sarpong I have very few curves (sometimes wish I had more🤷♀️😂) but my older sister is very curvy. I bought a shirt at target the other week and she loved it, tried on every size of it, but it clung to her body and curves in a way she didn’t feel comfortable with.... I think as Christian women we should be careful. It’s not completely on us to dress a certain way, but it is helpful to our brothers and helps them to not stumble;)
Laura Dohm but our brothers are supposed to resemble Jesus, and us the church. Do you think Jesus would want women to help men by hiding their beauty or would He want men to step up and work on themselves and learn to look at women without listing. I’m modest for myself and for my future husband so that he is the only one who sees my whole body, not to prevent others from lusting. That just doesn’t make sense to me. Learn self control.
Love the rawness and honesty of this, watching you two unpack this topic and not hiding the awkwardness of not having a clear answer, it was very sweet.
You two make excellent points on being modest...I myself dress modestly...especially when I go to the gym...I keep it simple...I wear a skull cap...big t-shirt, and baggy sweat pant...and old school high top converse sneakers 😅...I keep it old school 👍🏿
The wisdom you manage to pack into this video is astounding. Love! I don't really feel comfortable saying what I think is "right" on this topic because my opinion evolves so much that I hardly think I have the right to speak on it. I have noticed some interesting things though as I've thought about modesty myself. One thing is that I no longer feel comfortable wearing some things I used to be perfectly comfortable wearing. On the flip side, I have fallen into the trap of favouring clothes that are "modest" (ie. cover most of my body if not all of it) but are so attention-grabbing in their design that I'd probably be gaining more looks than if I wore a crop top and short shorts. Another thing is that my perception of what looks cute or pretty has slowly evolved over time. Clothes that show a lot of skin used to be SO cute to me, but now I feel far prettier when I cover up more.
Thank you for addressing that modesty matters for both genders! I think that if you have a modest heart and mind, the modest dress will naturally follow. ❤️
26:54-27:02 has me cracking up 😂 Answering your question though, yes, I do think shirtless guys are weaknesses for some people, including tight joggers, etc. But it depends on the person and how they're attracted to people. But as you said it goes both ways, I think girls and guys just have to be mindful of how to modestly dress their body depending on their situation and, as you refered to, "voluptuous assets." 😂
in regards to braiding hair and gold, back when that was written Harlots presented themselves like this, so it was not culturally appropriate, however for western culture it is different. It is also the motive for wearing certain things.
I thought this was a great video. In terms of the advising or telling friends about how they dress; I think let God guide you. I remember one of my best friends commented that my pants were too tight as I was blessed in the booty area and I was struggling still with a mental eating disorder so it was triggering for me. It's such a difficult topic as there is so much too be mindful of.
thanks for this open discussion, i actually appreciate how you guys say you don't have all the answers on this topic. For me personally something I have always preferred dressing modestly, and felt pretty comfortable in where I draw the line between modest and immodest. And my husband told me prior to us getting married that my modesty was something that attracted him to me. Now I sometimes feel weird being at the beach and i'm there dressed in a one piece be meanwhile girls are walking around in thongs and posing for photos for their instagrams... my husband wouldn't ever intentionally look but dark thoughts do come in thinking that he's lusting after them thinking i looked more like them or that i should dress more provocatively so that he looks at me.
I have a saying that I love: Wrong is still wrong even if everyone is doing it; right is still right even if nobody is doing it.
No you are totally correct and I understand where you are coming from! However, conviction would be the ultimate answer! True though!
I agree!!! It was just a saying that I felt really helps me! You’re totally right!
Yes!!! Hope you knew what I meant!
Love this
Just put this on my story! So good
“As children of the King, your purpose is not to turn heads. Your purpose is to turn hearts toward the King.” -Relentless Woman
Thanks for sharing gal! Is Relentless Woman a book? If so, I would be interested in reading it! Please let me know details :)
@@juliachan8421 Relentless Woman is a Facebook community group! The focus is being a woman after God's heart! I'm not sure if they have a book or not- from what I know they don't.
@@jessiehilby1994 Thank you! :)
Love this 👆
yessssss
I have a certain shape, so I try to refrain from wearing tight things. I started to cover up, and it's sad to say this, but people respect you more, because they see you respecting yourself.
Elegant Anne Beautifully put! I never thought of it that way
Same here.
Elegant Anne I'm glad I'm not the one who noticed that too!
Same here! I don't really feel comfortable in pants that show my butt and upper thighs either, since I have somewhat of a shape (not really though) 😅 And I don't know about you other women, but I've gotten too many sexy comments thrown at me from guys, and even had guys try to grab me on multiple occasions whilst wearing normal jeans. Some guys have even thrown remarks at me whilst wearing sweatpants and a really long jacket! So there's that aspect of wearing modest clothes too :)
So even if you're wearing modest clothes you can still receive crude remarks etc, but I absolutely agree that we shouldn't cause our brother or sister to stumble by wearing revealing clothes 😊
@@ketostudentlife5097 is this the 18th century, who says 'stumble' like that?
raise your arms and touch your toes, if anything shows, go change your clothes lol
Isabella Seal 😂👍🏼
Isabella Seal okay I’m using this saying for now on
This is the Dr Seuss book we all need
God bless
That's so good! Awesome! 🔥
I love how you guys talk through things and even have differing opinions and do so in such a respectful and honoring way.
There’s definitely a difference in admiring someone’s body and lusting after them. For example, I can look at a girls face and admire it, or even her body. Doesn’t mean I lust after her. Same thing for guys with nice biceps, I can see them and think they’re nice without going further than that. Being attracted to the other sex isn’t a bad thing, it’s what you do with that attraction
So true. Many times I have seen someone and thought "wow, God has blessed your face" (or whatever) and then I need to walk away. If I don't, then I sin.
Brianna Gervickas yes
True. This just means you're stronger than some people. People who have lust addictions can stumble easily. It may not be your fault, but I think we should do our best to make sure we're not the stumbling block people trip on
Romans 14:13
pineirokatherine Amen
You're so right Brianna! Well said!
I really like that you say that you don't know everything. It is so important that christians are honest about what the bible really says about certain topics and to not make things up that probably aren't true. Thanks for that.
one thing I heard that has stuck with me through the years is "your clothes should be tight enough to show that you're a woman but loose enough to show that you're a lady." And it has helped me find that balance like sutton's comment of "it's not saying you need to dress like a slob" etc.
Alanna Rhodes 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
no they shouldn't be that tight
I like this one 💗
That’s amazing
*The idea of "modesty" is a joke. God created us to be fully nude with NO SHAME and it was only when we started playing our own game that we started viewing our bodies as disgraceful. Most clothing has nothing to do with trying to be sexy, it's just the individual wearing what makes them comfortable. Clothing doesn't influence bad actions, character does.*
I LOVE THIS VIDEO!! The only thing I'd like to add is:
If you're trying to be modest and men/women still look at you lustfully, that is not your fault and you can't control others. Unfortunately sometimes women will wear clothing that isn't revealing and still get sexually harassed or worse. It can be a source of shame and sometimes the church doesn't do a great job at helping them through that.
So if you are truly doing what you can to try and prevent others from stumbling, but they choose to lust after you or treat you inappropriately, I believe God honors your efforts and I'm sorry if others sometimes don't.
(coming from someone who was sexually harassed at youth group a couple of times when wearing modest clothing!)
Lindsey Meig I can relate I’ll be honest I’ve got a thing for Chris brown he could wear a paper bag and I’m still looking period. So I can completely understand I think it’s a mindset
Amen!!!!
Are u okay also AMEN!!!!!!!!
Amen! PREACH!!!
Another cool POV is that modesty isn’t just in how you dress, but how you treat people, approach different situations and talk in general. Such as when you get mad how you react and so forth. Loved the video 🥳
Bella YES, modesty is an entire mindset!
Ama Park modesty is an entire act like faith, you don’t think it and you don’t believe it, you act upon it.
this is just as important too
Agreed !
Jahvon Bowers yes and faith you have to believe in it to act on it otherwise it means nothing. Same with modesty, belief that how you act is important can help you and motivate you.
I used to judge other women for wearing bikinis, but have come to realise that I was jealous of their bodies and was actually judging them to make myself feel better. I've had anorexia in the past and am sometimes uncomfortable in my body, and if I were ever to wear a bikini it would come from a place of accepting the body God gave me, not from trying to attract attention. The intention behind clothing is so important! I wear leggings to dance rehearsals because they're comfy and flexible, not because I'm trying to look 'sexy', but I would personally never wear low-cut tops in public because they don't feel classy to me and would attract unwanted attention. Thanks for starting this conversation you guys
I like your point about revealing more to accept your body rather than to be sexy! Thanks for sharing and may God bless you! 💝😊💝😊
@@inthemaking7988 Thanks! God bless you too xx
I have recently worn a bikini for similar reasons. I do not have an eating disorder but it is complicated and I've had other trauma. I left the church I was raised in at 30 yrs and it has been 2 years since I came off prescribed benzodiazepines. I wear one sometimes to accept my body too. 💕💕 I'll keep you in my prayers I'm glad you commented this
I honestly hate wearing revealing things because I am 15 and a late bloomer and I cant show off what I dont have
Good for you! Not judging is a great step in the right direction
Guys you are my family goals. My dad is a pastor in Romania. How crazy is that? We live so far away yet the same God unites us!
Miriam Miron ahh that's so cool!!
tought I was the only roumanian here...wow
@@Alecsx1 nu, nu :)
ce mulți suntem
@@T12-r8b să știi că da
I’ve been switching over to watching only Christians and churches on RUclips and I don’t have any social media anymore! I found you guys not too long ago and I’ve already watched all your videos! I think you guys are absolutely amazing and so brave talking about hard subjects. They are definitely things people need to be more mindful of! I just want you guys to know how amazing you are and your marriage has given me a lot of hope that I will find a God focused husband some day:)
Katarina Rose GIRL IM PROUD OF YOU. I have almost done that... I still need to go through my RUclips, it’s sO hArD yo clean out my phone😭
I totally agree, watching Christian RUclipsrs has been so helpful for me to stay reminded that there are Christians who are here to help support when it seems everyone is going out and living worldy.
So true, me too.
I have done that too. I will still watch secular RUclips once and awhile, but I cannot subscribe to non Christian channels. Been doing this for a year now and it's been great!!
Abigail Betts I still watch other non Christians every once in awhile too😜
The thing I have a hard time with....people lust after others even when we are totally covered up. At what point do we just have to say enough and hold the viewer accountable for their own thoughts?
The key is to simply honor God in how you dress and conduct yourself. He will convict others accordingly.
@@jackjones3657 I agree. But that often doesn't seem to be what people tend to imply with the modesty message. It comes across as it being our duty to stop other people's sins. As you said, only God can do that. Of course I agree that the way we dress sends a certain message, I am just not fond of the way that is explained in many Christian circles. If that makes sense.
Anna, its good you are mindful of what you wear, at least you have done your part, however, if others are still lusting after you even if your covered up, its no longer your job, it is now their problem and they clearly have a lust issue and need deliverance, so this is very different and they need to seek God on this. Ps: men also need to be mindful of how they dress, if they are shirtless or wearing tanks that is just as sinful, they cant override Gods standards and they will be accoutable for their actions and false teachings.
@@jackjones3657 you're crazy, utterly crazy.
So true Anna!
I personally really liked how you guys talked about modesty for BOTH guys and gals. Most people I have listened to who talk about modesty only focus on the girls - saying they have to cover up etc, and it's basically completely their job to stop guys lusting after them. But it does go both ways and I think everyone needs to be mindful of this! Yes people need to be careful of what they wear, but also on controlling those thoughts, like ya'll touched on in the video
My thoughts on how guys dress is this. Please don't wear pants that are tight in the crotch area! Thanks for your positivity on RUclips!
Yes
I would “like” this so many more times if I could👍🏾
Agree!
my exact thoughts
Please also don’t wear your pants so low I can see your underwear.
“I don’t wear a shirt playing tennis because I like to get a tan...but why do I like to be tan?” Lol I love how y’all keep it real and honest!
I think for guys, a big thing with modesty is more about how they act and talk. I believe that guys know ways to make a girl lustful by their tone of voice, how close they stand, what they talk about
THIS IS SO TRUE! Wow, I don’t think I’ve even thought about guys doing this before in that way, thanks for bringing this to my and others attention!
so men can be shirtless right?
Also true, but I think that goes for girls too... if girls are acting overly flirtatious I think it can have an affect on guys too. Yes, guys are very heavily stimulated by looks alone, but attitudes and mannerisms can cause guys to stumble too. So women, please cover up for our sake to glorify God. Men, lead by example and do the same. Men, do not act in a way that would cause a women to feel tempted towards lusting after you. Women, please know that this can affect guys too and refrain from being overly flirtatious.
Yes
great point. it's not about looks for some women, it's just about flirting. Is the man intentionally trying to seduce a woman?
Such a tough topic but y’all did great!! 🙌🏻
I ask my husband if what I am wearing is modest and vice versa. If he feels that I am wearing something that would draw attention to me in a negative way he lets me know. I also let him know. Because what man wants another man looking lustfully at his wife and what wife wants another woman looking lustfully at her husband.
That is a great idea! Thank you.
Agreed, especially among God focused or moral people! In a worldly aspect though some people might want to do that because they feel validated or of higher value if people are jealous to have/be with their spouse. Kind of a my spouse is better than your spouse thing.
You let your husband control you, that's messed up.
This is beyond ridiculous men are gunna Lust no matter what I have on and I am pretty conservative. Do you wear a swimsuit?
My husband does NOT control me. If you go back and read my comment you will see that both my husband and I tell each other if what we are wearing is just a bit too much. Has nothing to do with controlling but respecting each other. Now that is how we personally make our clothing decisions.
“Running around naked is not modest.”
Thank you, Nate, thank you. 🤣
I love how they talked about modesty for guys! This kind of conversation needs happen more!
You guy’s videos are so refreshing in today’s day and age. I decided to stop wearing bikinis a couple of years ago, when I thought of it as being the same as my underwear. Only the fabric is different. So then I thought: Well I wouldn’t want anyone to see me in my underwear, but a bikini is accepted, even though it’s the same thing. I want to save my body for my future husband to be seen. I just wear board shorts and a T-shirt now. I feel much more comfortable in that. Not sharing this to judge. :) Just sharing my experience. Thanks for putting out these videos!
@Love Rules Only God judges. Stop being a hypocrite.
Danique Tersmette Same.
10000% agreeee
I am thankful for Tankini tops & shorts or swim skirts!
I have said this exact same thing, and I wear board shorts and a tshirt as well! It was so encouraging to read your comment and to know there are other ladies out there with the same mindset!
I think as we grow in our relationship with Christ and with others, modesty comes with that. When you care about yourself, God, and others when making decisions, and allow the Holy Spirit to guide you, you will do the right thing. I try not to follow the world's standards. It really does matter what you look at to guide you.
Jam I agree but I think you also have to think about the people who didn’t grow up with your same mindset. What if their modest isn’t your modest then what? That’s what I run into a lot. How do you approach that situation if that other person thinks it’s okay???
@@BG-pr1rx Thanks for your comment. It is a cultural thing too. Environment and setting is also a factor. If someone makes you feel uncomfortable, I would talk with them about it. Share your feelings and expectations and allow the person to share as well. You can learn a lot about the person and that dialog is what can be most helpful.
So true!! And encouraging, thank you🥲🙌🏼
My general rule is asking myself:
Am I causing someone else to stumble into lust?
Am I honoring my husband & body being appropriately covered?
Dress as though I’m spending the day with Jesus.
🙏🏾
Yes I agree !
"Dress as though I'm spending the day with Jesus" YASS.
Jesus spent his time with anyone, and was also in a different culture
So smart!!!!
spending the day with jesus is so clever! I usually think spending the day with my grandparents haha
Nate and Sutton, this was so wonderful...I cannot wait to see "Modesty Part 2." (Smile). Some of my favorite key points were: 1. What God says about a matter and knowing the true intent of our hearts are paramount. 2. Personal conviction or lack thereof is not a reliable guide for a modesty standard. 3. Iron sharpens iron, (we need others to help us see what we cannot see) 4. It's okay to say, "I don't know, but I will try to find out."
I really appreciate your perspective on this. I love that you focused on thinking more about the heart and the mindset, rather than setting out specific rules we must follow! Thank you, y'all.
Haha you guys are so funny and honest. Really enjoyed your take and dialogue on this topic😄 Morgan and I are in the car listening and every few mins we pause to discuss😁 haha
Paul and Morgan Lol glad you guys enjoyed it! such a tough topic!
*The idea of "modesty" is a joke. God created us to be fully nude with NO SHAME and it was only when we started playing our own game that we started viewing our bodies as disgraceful. Most clothing has nothing to do with trying to be sexy, it's just the individual wearing what makes them comfortable. Clothing doesn't influence bad actions, character does.*
I always just think back to victorian times when ankles were considered to be sexy...
I lived in South Sudan for two years and it was immodest to wear pants so i wore skirts but now I live in America and I wear Jeans and shorts with no conviction but in South Sudan I would feel guilty wearing those. A lot depends on culture but of course their are absolute boundaries
@@potatogorl2471 I agree that culture is a big contributor on how l "modesty" is defined.
Someone once said to me “modest is hottest”
that kinda misses tge poinr of being modest
Very true
You guys are such a blessing! 💖 It's funny Nate mentioned his granny didn't like his sister wearing pants; our granny didn't like it either! 😊
Less attention on my body more on my character (or talent?) thus big picture ...glorifying God ✨💕
You guys handled this topic so well! Honestly so thankful for you two & your channel! 🥰
Nate is CEO of saying awkward things and Sutton is CEO of laughing at him😂❤️ love you all
As a young, unmarried woman, I get really uncomfortable when guys are shirtless, or wearing tanktops. I don't necessarily lust after them, but I am curious, so I have to try really hard not to look... But maybe that's just me🤷🏼♀️
Not just you. I feel the same. I am pretty uncomfortable when a guy goes shirtless, and sometimes it's so bad I can't talk to them. I just look away.
Arms are fine though, but I do think tank tops reveal too much.
Its not you, its a sin.... God will deal with these men, he is a hypocrite, they talk about others on social media posing lustful pics, but they themselves have no issue flaunting their bodies for us in bikini's and shirtless tops... God will deal with them, I too lust over men, and I try not to look, but God will deal with these seducers (men and women).... I too have to try not to look and these men when they are half naked or wearing tight T's, men think that its ok for them to do what they wilt and God will wink at their sins, but men show off just as much of their assets as women do, they will be accountable for making women stumble, I dont care what they say in this video.... they are clearly trying to override Gods word and make ppl feel good in their sin... I actually rebuked this guy months ago because he was parading shirtless and he had an attitude.... Run from wolves... God tells us to test all spirits, many will come in Jesus name and decieve many, we are in the end times, narrow is the road and only few find it.......
Ps: Also another thing Jesus showed me... He also walked the earth as an example and he was not topless, men in those days all wore robes, covered from head to toe... it is one thing to learn how to be more modest and have God help you and grow you in that area.... its another thing for a person to be too prideful to be taught what modesty is and teach Gods flock how to sin with them... this is dangerous and just like teaching bad doctrine, they will be accountable for teaching people to sin with our bodies, our bodies belong to the Lord period...
@@jesusreturning3003 please get help.
Jesus Loves umm... what?
@@joys.6347I agree
"God wants us to have our heart in the right place" LOVE THAT!!
I think modesty starts inwardly and works its way outwardly. A person can have a skirt all the way to the ground and covered all over but still not be modest and humble in her heart. Like wise a guy can cover all the way up but also not be modest inside his heart. If you focus on giving your heart to God. You will naturally be drawn to covering up the way the Holy Spirit wants you to if you listen to his voice.
Personally I don't think theres such a thing as modest bikinis.
Donna Lu I agree!
Agreed.
Exactly!
I agree.
Deffo,a bikini is a bikini lol.
so if you say you wear tank tops to the gym because you like to see yourself get pumped up... why wouldn't it be okay for a girl or woman to wear leggings to see their leg / glute muscles get pumped up?
Aude 🙌 modesty is wearing things for you and not for others! If you want to see yourself bulk up, you are good! If you want to show others you bulking up, you’re not good! That’s how I view it and t goes for guys and girls.
huh
@@ellieb8627 people are motivated by others progress.
@@ellieb8627 It is a public place though.
@@ellieb8627 but what can't you show yourself off. Flex. What's the dealio?
I have a rule for modesty that I use. It’s the one-piece swimsuit rule: if it doesn’t cover a full piece swimsuit it’s not okay. I also just find clothes that are less modest borderline uncomfortable. Also I LOVE how you guys address both genders!!!!! Much love from Oregon
When a guy with a blessed butt wears a really tight-fitting jean, it is hard not to look at.
Thank you, Nate and Sutton!
René Bekker “Blessed butt” lolol
@@estaault2450 😆🙋🏼♀️
Truuuuuuue
*The idea of "modesty" is a joke. God created us to be fully nude with NO SHAME and it was only when we started playing our own game that we started viewing our bodies as disgraceful. Most clothing has nothing to do with trying to be sexy, it's just the individual wearing what makes them comfortable. Clothing doesn't influence bad actions, character does.*
@@estaault2450 🤣
Coming from someone who used to struggle with immodesty and always wanted "rules and guidelines" to know if I was right or wrong, I know now that God is not so concerned with what we wear or how we dress. He wants our heart. If immodesty is your struggle, it points you back to a heart issue. I look back on younger me and I wish I could tell myself not to focus so much on what I can get by with without sinning but to focus on seeking God's heart and wanting to please Him. When we seek Him first, then He aligns our hearts with His and changes our heart to not want to dress immodestly
Love you and your vids Nate and Sutton😍
Here is an interesting thought: wearing a bikini is the same as, or more revealing than a bra and underwear...
This reminds us that we can get used to things.
But really, we should be more mindful of how much we are revealing to others.
I have even seen people wearing obvious bras at a beach. And I thought sadly, 'Really, what's the difference?'
Absolutely!
I was rather shocked to hear her justify bikinis, as they are anything but modest and clearly contradict scripture!
I agree. You might as well wear your bra and underwear. It’s the same thing.
@@stephaniejones2565 a bikini is better for the water though, a normal bra and knickers would get soaked.
Lorien Kam so you’re saying that this ( api-romwe.romwe.com/h5/rw_share/romwe_goods_detail/452251?lan=en&site=iosrwus ) swimsuit is supposedly sinful and not super cute? i was planning on buying it for when my mom and i go to the river over summer
@@zeejies9124 An outfit like that, I would happily wear on a romantic night with my husband at home or in an enclosed, secluded area. I think wearing it in public, I wouldn't feel like I'm pleasing God or caring about the weaknesses of others. God bless you!
even though i don’t agree with everything y’all believe, i think you’re such a cute couple and seem like genuinely good people and genuine believers! 💛💛💛
You know you’re shirtless in the introduction right Nate!?
😂😂😂😂😂
Ummm....Lol
CJ knose And there is nothing wrong with that!
Joybutterfly1977 Could a female be shirtless?
He even mentioned that he didn't previously think about how that could be tempting to women because culture doesn't really talk about it. We're all still learning!
I enjoyed this. Very well said. It’s not about a certain set of rules, rather the idea of blessing God’s heart with the clothes with which you dress. I like this a lot.
Y’all did a great job.. always referring us back to what the heart of God is saying... regarding the issue of modesty for guys .. In my opinion wearing tight jeans is very revealing and should be considered when thinking about pleasing God. I know everyone wants a “guide” to all of these things but I do believe that If your looking to please God He will show you and convict your conscience
As someone who is openly gay and not Christian, I totally relate to your sentiment about modesty. I didn’t realize until recently that my whole life I have been dressing modestly, I just knew it made me feel good. I really do think that the way somebody dresses attracts certain people and I certainly want to attract people who respect me. Thanks for posting this video!
When I know a person is married, I may see they are beautiful, but I won't feel any attraction towards that person, regardless of what they are wearing. I'm sure it was God who created me that way, because I can definitely feel attracted towards single men. I really find it very odd that someone would comment on Nate's shirts being too tight on the arms, is that enough for them to become attracted to him? It sounds silly to me, but to each their own. I'm Portuguese and in the summer it's very natural for guys to be shirtless, our summers can be really hot. I think clothing should be a personal decision based on each person's comfort level, but also on how comfortable would the person be if they kept being stared at for wearing those clothes or for taking them off. If someone feels uncomfortable wearing something, then they shouldn't. If they feel good and it doesn't get them any unwanted attention, then they should wear it as much as they want. Nate's tank tops are extremely common in Portugal, almost all men wear them. I wouldn't consider a tank top to be sexy or attention grabbing, except if it was made of leather or had fishnet or something like that. I think you are modest people who are going an extra mile to make other comfortable and that's incredible. I loved this video so much, I love how genuine you are. Sending Sutton a big hug and sending Nate a Hi5. I miss Oaklan, maybe we could get to see him in the next video? :D
"But why do I like to get a tan?" I dont know if you realize how funny you guys are, haha. Good stuff!
When i got serious with my faith i felt God tugging on me to brighten up my wardrobe and stop wearing so much black. I just ask God daily what should i wear? I was praying a few months ago about changing my wardrobe and next thing you know, i had my mentors (a few ladies from my church) bring me some clothes and they brought a lot! Things i wouldn't pick out but i tried them on and loved all of it! Little by little, i started changing things and i just felt brighter. I felt happier and more content and def felt alot more confident all around! I dress to impress God and its just something that convicts my heart that tells me what i should and shouldn't wear. Amanda Ferguson is great help with this! Highly suggest listening to her videos and some of her Facebook videos on this topic. One video that's really great is on a podcast called single confident women ( regardless if your single) and she shares her thoughts about this topic. She is a proper edicate coach. Its packed with great insight! Another hands down, great video. I feel like I can come here to get wise counsel and good wisdom. I really appreciate all your hard work you both put into these videos! 😇💙 as always praying for all 4 of you!
Ive been hit on in normal workout gear. Why? Because some people are just creepy no matter what. Resisting temptation is a part of life and people need to learn to control themselves regardless of what someone is wearing.
That is not creepy if a man hits on you at all. Grow up :/
not sure I understand what your getting at. why does she need to grow up. she didn't say anything that didn't sound grown up
you need to grow up because you didn't read her comment or I don't think you understood it.
@@rudy1999 while working out it is. I have been hit on after being in the feild for two weeks with only baby wipes for a shower. Some people are just that creepy.
I love you guys because you are 100% yourselves. You are so inspiring. I want marriage like that!! May Jesus bless you and your channel! :)
This sparked a great conversation for my husband and I. This year God has really put modesty on our hearts. My husband no longer has his shirt off if he is around anyone but me. So even at the beach. We also live in the South so it can be uncomfortable. He doesn’t wear anything without sleeves even to the gym. He doesn’t wear tight shirts. He doesn’t wear skinny jeans so it’s not so much a problem but he is blessed in the back section so he won’t always tuck his shirt in. He never looks weird or frumpy. We believe that God calls us to yield to your spouse, after God, so if your spouse wants you to dress more modestly than you should. Basically whoever’s idea is the most modest that’s what happens. We believe if you are choosing to honor your spouses wishes for modesty(if it’s more than your own) than you are headed in a good direction in honoring the Lord.
I think it's unattractive when someone is obviously trying to be attractive.
Katie Grace what do you expect? People to try and look not attractive? Okay 👌🏾
There isn’t anything wrong with being attractive. In the Bible obviously Sarah was attractive because Abraham was scared the Egyptians were going to kill him if they knew she was his wife. I think the word would be when someone is trying to be seductive.
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say it like that. I mean that I'm often more attracted to those who are being themselves. I feel like sometimes people try to win others over by doing things or dressing in a way that they think would be attractive, rather than just being themselves.
@@katherinegrace3694 I understood what you are saying and I agree.
I get what you mean personality wise..ppl should be themselves. But it’s fine for ppl to dress up and wear make up, etc. everyone tries to be attractive to a certain extent...do you shower? Brush your hair and teeth?? You know??
This video is so amazing!! God used it to speak to me so much. As a guy, I had never really thought that much about my responsibility to dress modestly. I love working out, so when Nate started talking about how he dressed in the gym, it hit me dead on. I realized that I was dressing to draw the wrong kind of attention to myself. My life's purpose is to point to God, not to draw attention to myself. And worse than that, I was trying to draw impure reactions out of my girlfriend. God used this to convict me so much and completely change my outlook at the gym and in life in general. God has blessed my journey toward modesty so much, and I have had so much more peace and joy since embarking on this journey. Thank you so much Nate and Sutton for speaking the truth boldly and in love!
I’m so happy that they didn’t just talk about what girls have to do and there responsibility! Love christians who treat woman and men equal!!!
Same!
No body:
Nate: I got a pretty big butt.
This is the deepest video I've ever watched on this subject. Just found your channel and watched a few videos. You guys are really blessed with wisdom. Thanks for making these videos and for being an example of what it means to follow Jesus.
Garland of Grace welcome to the channel!
I'm a new TRUE Christian and I've been watching your videos all morning, I love it! I feel like I relate to everything you both say. I feel relieved that I'm not alone on my thoughts but also my intuitions seem to be right. I've also recently started going out with another saved Christian who holds the same beliefs as I and I'm so excited. Watching your videos has been an answer to my prayers because I was having doubts but watching you two as a couple gives me inspiration.
P.S. I am one of those big butt people LOL soooo, I guess I need to work on my wardrobe! Thanks for the train of thoughts!
Honestly, yu two gave me hope that there is still good people in this world.
You guys deserve so much more subscribers! Thank you for addressing difficult topics and sharing your faith to the world. Please continue doing what you do. Love you both 😊
when guys wear tight pants or shirts, it can be too revealing.
My thought: My dad always insisted I go out in public looking very nice because he wanted me to present myself in a way that my best personality could shine.
Finally a channel with manner and benefit topics to discussed with people 💕💕🙏
I think we should focus more on teaching everyone "to look at others" with modesty, rather than dressing modestly. You should not feel entitled to look at another person just because they are wearing something revealing. If you go to an African tribe where women are topless, how would you react? Very differently for sure. The thing is if you teach about dressing modestly, then you feel by doing it you are doing something right, while the others who don't are doing something wrong. So when you see it, you judge. I feel like all this mentality just makes it awkward to see the skin when it shouldn't.
No offense but in the Bible, dressing modesty is all about respect for other’s eyes, so the way you see modesty is selfish. When you dress half naked you’re sinning against men and God, you don’t care if the people around you are struggling with sexual lust sin so you dress how you want to dress without a second thought of what other people might think of the way you’re dressing.
Women struggle with sexual lust sin too but men struggle with it more because most men are attracted to women and women have more sexual ornaments on their body than men, so that’s why men struggle with sexual lust sin more than women and why the Bible was being specific with women dress code.
@@maskedman.428 I feel the opposite is true. If a man expects women to cover because he feels attracted to them, then HE is being selfish.
Abc Oh Lust and attraction are two different things. Lust is a strong sexual desire while attraction is just attracted to something you find very interest in.
I don’t know if you’re a believer and a Christian but a true Godly woman would cover more of her skin up to try to save a soul from lust sin, and a true Godly man would do the same too.
Jahvon Uchiha you are no one to say Im not godly because I dont agree with your sexist way. Learn to control your lust and let me dress how i want. If my intentions are not to cause it, ive done nothing wrong.
Abc Oh Your view of modesty is selfish because you don’t care about other people’s struggle with sin, you ungodly woman.
I am so excited to get your guidance on this topic!! I’ve been waiting for this video!! ❤️
Miranda hope it helps!
I love Nate acknowledging how women stumble and he is considering if he should have your shirt off because yes that is definitely tough for some girls more than others. And boys acting as if they can do whatever isn’t smart through faith
I am a girl with a big butt! I have had struggles my whole life. No matter how modestly I dress, I STILL get comments from guys. I was wearing only long dresses to work. I was a little surprised at the sheer number of guys that would tell me how much they like full figured girls or how much they love a juicy booty. My mom criticized my dress wearing. She asked me “Have you ever seen what you look like from behind? There is no amount of modesty that will hide that booty!” So I do my best to dress modestly, but no matter what I do, I can’t hide my booty.
There are guys out there that lust after heavyset women, skinny women, and voluptuous women,.
my opinion on modesty: wear what makes you feel good and comfortable. i think we sexualize the human body too much.
Jules Rabdau totally agree
Women are naturally curvy.
This would be a great philosophy if we weren’t naturally wired to sexualize the opposite sex.
@@shaewright7428 🙄
Yasss agree and I felt this video was body shaming from both of them saying women who are more blessed need to cover more like that's so offensive!!
Personally if a guy is in good shape and not wearing a shirt it can provoke lustful thoughts. I can imagine how the guys feel when we wear revealing clothing. Let's all help each other and try our best to be modest :)
Love watching y’all with my fiancé! Y’all are just so sweet and uplifting! 🥰
we don't live in biblical times
Really great video guys, I agree with everything your talking about with being modest and making sure to think of our brothers in Christ so they don’t fall into sexual thoughts or temptation! 🙌🏼🙏🏼
Love you guys!!! You are such an inspiration and joy to watch!!!
Giana Washburn aww thank you 💛💛
I think u guys handled this topic so well! You guys both dress modestly but even more than that u guys carry yourselves in such a respectful way and that can also change the way an outfit comes off.
Ps. Nate’s shirts are perfectly fine in my opinion.
Both beautiful people inside and out.
when i show myself respect, i tell myself that it’s never ever my responsibility to make sure people behave if they feel “tempted” by my clothing. i tell myself that something’s horribly wrong if i need to cover up to be respectfully treated. it makes me sad to think about the people who are being taught that it’s on them to keep others from hurting them. and my heart breaks for the people who have to listen to the question “well, what were you wearing?” in court or at home or with friends or anywhere else
Tyra 100% agree with you. This is such a damaging mindset to have
I agree with you! I believe in being modest for both boys and girls. However, I don’t think it’s to protect others from lusting. For me, it’s just a personal thing where I don’t want just anyone to see my body because I believe only my husband should one day be able to fully see it. And the same goes for my future husband. I would hope he is being modest so that I am the only person who fully sees his body one day. Idk if that makes sense but that’s how I view it?
I 2000% agree
don’t you think that a man wearing a tight shirt that is showing off his biceps claiming a woman wearing leggings is immodest, is hypocritical?
Lust from another person also happens if we dress modest. I believe a great deal falls on our conscience. We must guard our thoughts and hearts and when we do fall, ask God to forgive us and pray for strength in that area. Modesty goes hand in hand with our actions. We can be cover from head to toe but our actions can still cause another to stumble.
So very true. ...we can be covered from head to toe and still cause another to stumble. But we must still give an account to God so it's between each individual person and God to decide whats right for themselves as they try to be mindful of those around them.
Adventureinlife very true.
"if you really want to stand out as a beautiful woman girl" 😂
One thing that comes to mind is the way having different moral standards for different bodies promotes thin privilege and shaming of people in larger bodies (which is already an issue obviously). How can we set these standards in a way that doesn’t make life more difficult for some people than others and set some people up to be shamed?
Love this video so much. I love having this conversation with people and hearing their opinions, it’s a super tough topic for the church.
I believe it’s not one gender’s responsibility but it’s shared, like you guys said. It’s both gender’s responsibility to dress in a way that is honoring to the other and it’s a mutual command to not lust. I personally do also believe that it does come down to each persons convictions. I have a conviction about the length of shorts I wear, but do also wear a bikini to the beach. I think that the type of clothes you wear and the way you present yourself reflects a lot about who you are and your relationship with the Lord. I care more about my relationship with Jesus than how cute my butt could look in “short shorts”.
You guys really nailed it on this video and thanks for being careful in your choice of words. Also, thanks for being super real and honest with us about your convictions, amazing. 😘
I never really think about how I look like in clothes or which parts of my body I am showing or covering. I do not follow specific rules here. For me as a Christian, the most important question is where my clothes come from. I could never buy or wear clothes connected to human rights violation, and I am basically referring to the whole fast fashion industry. I think as Christians we have a responsibility to not support those companies and buy fair fashion clothes (and fair products in general!) instead.
I am convinced that God is more interested in how we live and behave (also regarding our behavior of buying and consuming) than how we look like.
Thank you so much for sharing this video! Modesty is something I’ve been studying for a while now and I love hearing other Christian outlooks on the topic. Y’all are such an encouragement!
Really hope you guys reach 100k subs before the end of the year💕
Clarice Kick it's getting so close!!
Something interesting I have always scratched my head at:
Swimsuits and stomachs.
Seriously.
I remember going to Bible camp when I was a young teen and having to wear a one piece or tankini. I actually felt more uncomfortable with what was acceptable as “modest” because it fit in that swimsuit category. I always preferred bikinis - ones with high coverage bottoms and higher coverage, sports bra style tops. They covered so much more than the high cut hips and low cut tops of one pieces and tankinis that were deemed acceptable because bellies were covered.
It’s somehow become more modest for bellies to be covered than actual butts/boobs, while guys wear swim trunks and show off everything else.
100%
I wear a shirt and shorts.
There are plenty of truly MODEST swimsuits, which cover from shoulders to knees, as the Bible says we should!
@@Living4YHWH show me the verse where the Bible says to cover from your shoulders to you knees. Somehow I've read the Bible and never come across it...
@@Living4YHWH the bible is just a book. If it told you to kill yourself or enslave your child would you?
Lol I am very curvy and I sing In church, anytime I wear something that might be modest to me but not to the church 😂😂😂, they pull me aside and tell me. But those who are not curvy be wearing the same thing and are not told anything. 😂😂😂
that is messed up, I'm sorry your body has been over-sexualized by your church. you deserve better.
Nana Adwoa Sarpong I have very few curves (sometimes wish I had more🤷♀️😂) but my older sister is very curvy. I bought a shirt at target the other week and she loved it, tried on every size of it, but it clung to her body and curves in a way she didn’t feel comfortable with.... I think as Christian women we should be careful. It’s not completely on us to dress a certain way, but it is helpful to our brothers and helps them to not stumble;)
Laura Dohm but our brothers are supposed to resemble Jesus, and us the church. Do you think Jesus would want women to help men by hiding their beauty or would He want men to step up and work on themselves and learn to look at women without listing. I’m modest for myself and for my future husband so that he is the only one who sees my whole body, not to prevent others from lusting. That just doesn’t make sense to me. Learn self control.
So spot on...was going to say something like this. 😔
just be careful and ask someone to help you decide whether something is modest or not.
Love the rawness and honesty of this, watching you two unpack this topic and not hiding the awkwardness of not having a clear answer, it
was very sweet.
You two make excellent points on being modest...I myself dress modestly...especially when I go to the gym...I keep it simple...I wear a skull cap...big t-shirt, and baggy sweat pant...and old school high top converse sneakers 😅...I keep it old school 👍🏿
Me too..health reasons too. Dirty floors in aerobic room, mats, benches, etc. Old school gym. Notice dudes don't wear skintight workout clothes.
The wisdom you manage to pack into this video is astounding. Love! I don't really feel comfortable saying what I think is "right" on this topic because my opinion evolves so much that I hardly think I have the right to speak on it. I have noticed some interesting things though as I've thought about modesty myself. One thing is that I no longer feel comfortable wearing some things I used to be perfectly comfortable wearing. On the flip side, I have fallen into the trap of favouring clothes that are "modest" (ie. cover most of my body if not all of it) but are so attention-grabbing in their design that I'd probably be gaining more looks than if I wore a crop top and short shorts. Another thing is that my perception of what looks cute or pretty has slowly evolved over time. Clothes that show a lot of skin used to be SO cute to me, but now I feel far prettier when I cover up more.
Did i ever told you guys that o love you ??? I love you ... There it is 🤣
anonymous anonymous lol we love you!
Lol.... I love them too😊😊,all the way from Nigeria
Thank you for addressing that modesty matters for both genders! I think that if you have a modest heart and mind, the modest dress will naturally follow. ❤️
26:54-27:02 has me cracking up 😂 Answering your question though, yes, I do think shirtless guys are weaknesses for some people, including tight joggers, etc. But it depends on the person and how they're attracted to people. But as you said it goes both ways, I think girls and guys just have to be mindful of how to modestly dress their body depending on their situation and, as you refered to, "voluptuous assets." 😂
Good point. Shapely body is a challenge.
I loved this video. People may try to tear this apart but you are spreading God’s love and word. And that is always the goal!
in regards to braiding hair and gold, back when that was written Harlots presented themselves like this, so it was not culturally appropriate, however for western culture it is different. It is also the motive for wearing certain things.
Just because culture changed over the last years it doesn’t mean GOD changed! Well said, Nate!
I thought this was a great video. In terms of the advising or telling friends about how they dress; I think let God guide you. I remember one of my best friends commented that my pants were too tight as I was blessed in the booty area and I was struggling still with a mental eating disorder so it was triggering for me. It's such a difficult topic as there is so much too be mindful of.
thanks for this open discussion, i actually appreciate how you guys say you don't have all the answers on this topic. For me personally something I have always preferred dressing modestly, and felt pretty comfortable in where I draw the line between modest and immodest. And my husband told me prior to us getting married that my modesty was something that attracted him to me.
Now I sometimes feel weird being at the beach and i'm there dressed in a one piece be meanwhile girls are walking around in thongs and posing for photos for their instagrams... my husband wouldn't ever intentionally look but dark thoughts do come in thinking that he's lusting after them thinking i looked more like them or that i should dress more provocatively so that he looks at me.
Very well said!! Thanks for sharing, and living what you share. God bless!!!🥰🙏
modesty is something I’ve been struggling with so I’m so thankful y’all made this !! I love y’all & your videos sm! Thank you!!! :)