It seems women are natural attracters of love and abundance when we relax and know our worth. Every woman I've met who's in their black cat energy seems at peace, not only in relationships but in life.
> respect your cycle moods bodies signals > be confident in being alone > do no be responsive > Date a little below your league because you are the Prize slightly out of the league > do not ask them how you feel all the time > read more on feminine energy > nurture rather than mother do not control > do not change people be people who they are > ask if you like them > have a life man is just an addition >do not nag > don't be afraid to lose the jerks
Dating below your league? Dont agree with that at all. When dating someone below your league , you’ll have 0 respect to this person and you’ll start getting annoyed by their attention. You need to feel and believe like you are HER even though you can be objectively a simple normal girl. Men should be more successful, more rich and so on than their partners imho, but making him feel that you are the queen no matter what is the key. Even though you can be less successful than him. Don’t be in a competition with men who is cooler, richer and so on, but give him the feeling that you are absolutely happy by yourself, with yourself and with your own life. Don’t give him the feeling that he is the prize but act like you are a prize for him even though he is a billionaire and you are a simple girl. Period
@@veronicadani did you even listen to the whole thing? Dating below the league is context with looks not in terms with discipline, money and career growth . When you date a man who thinks he's above everyone because he's handsome they put you down only handful are humble about it. I've just written the pointer you will have to listen the entire vid
@@ds3380 I accidentally addressed your comment specifically, but I watched the entire video and as I understand Margarita meant “below your league in general”, not only looks. But even though if she meant looks i still don’t get it. I like to date someone really handsome cause only this way I can be attracted to them…I chose not a handsome guy once but he ended up being cheater #1, so I don’t really agree with any of that. If I carry myself like a queen and actually am a queen inside than I want the best best option for me, not someone below in any way possible :/
I have a rescued black cat . She is easily spooked, so when she does approach and settle down next to me, it feels like a gift. I just need to personify that cat energy.
It's ironic how the whole video talks about chasing the cat but you yourself know that chasing it would spook it, and understand that it has to come to you on its own
@@Olga0265 It took 2.5 years of consistent therapy (2 times a week for 1 hour each session). Most of the work I did was outside of therapy. So my therapist taught me coping mechanisms and I had to do the work outside of therapy. I still have traces of anxious attachment but that’s normal because it will always linger around.
@AllUserNamesAreUsedit’ll come for you when you’re ready to receive it. There’s no “I’ll just always be like this while he goes and so so” what’s for you won’t miss you so what does it matter if he goes on? Then he wasn’t for you Trust that your time is coming, your healing is happening now
1. Learn about femininity and let them chase 2. Her emotions are active not reactive 13:42 jornal but don’t just complain 3. Don’t close anything 15:13 Be the observer 4. U should be slightly out of his league cause u are the prize 5. 18:50 they are not mama Don’t control don’t constantly ask how a man is feeling 6.don’t try to change people.let them be and dicide if u want to be with them 7. 20:35 don’t need to make them happy to feel happy yourself. 8. Stop asking if people like you and start asking if you like them 21:30 Make a list why u like him, is it enough? 9. Don’t wait for his call if he didn’t schedule already move on. 10. Don’t nag. Take away energy 26:56 11. Life is so short and precious. Don’t be afraid to loose anyone
Black Cat energy is not allowing anyone who tries to instill fear and/or makes you anxious. It truly is about not allowing anyone to take you out of your emotions. If there's a vision you see for yourself, even if it's not written on paper, but you visually see it... you go for it.
I was a black cat until I fell in love. I’m trying to be more reserved but at the end I behave as a gold retriever and start chasing him. It’s really hard to control
@@sylwia0123 U feeling humiliated while chasing him is a humiliation don't be humiliated to be yourself it's feminine nature to be dependent and chase
It’s exhausting! 😂 I can’t even do it anymore. I don’t have the strength anyways mentally or physically. But I’m also 48. In my younger years I needed this info x
@@MrsBrandiSherman 😂😂 unfortunately Margarita with still in her little minky years and the internet didn’t exist. I’m talking like I needed this as a 18 year old 😂 x
i just found your channel i am in a 30 year marriage(high school sweethearts) & I have been the golden retriever the whole time! I am tired... your videos are so helpful, ty...Ladies, its never too late to choose yourself and be the black cat that you were born to be
The funny part is that I was naturally born this way & I was forced to become a golden retriever by the world, even the women in my life! I suffered so much. I went back to being myself during my late 20's since I wasn'tdependenton my family anymore & life just keeps getting sweeter! The same women are jealous now but still refuse to just stop controlling everything lol. I'm so glad you exist! I feel sane, supported & understood. Thank you, God bless you! 💖
In my current relationship I started as a black cat but quickly became a golden retriever and I am becoming the black cat again. We'll see how things go
I was feeling off this days. Like out of balance. Today the guy I was dating for a Year told that he doesn't want a commitment. I was starting to write that long texts when i Think "i Will See this video first". Thanks You so much for your wisdom. I feel peace now.
I’m mostly black cat, but I have been retriever from time to time. Not usually with the man in my life, but with other people in public that I do business with. It’s very seldom, but I have been guilty of losing my temper.
Love this! I really appreciated the example of when a man asks what's wrong you're different and you say "Yeah I'm different. I don't like that you did that. It is what it is. For now that's me. When I'm over it you'll know. That's how I feel" GOLD. I needed that.
@@Paulina-yv7gomy ex husband would ogle women in front of me. That’s when my energy would shift and he’d ask and I’d say this 👆🏼and he’d respond by chasing my approval of him.
Moral of the story : be with someone who loves you. Not with who you love. if you liked him first, fell in love with him first and approached him first, he's never ever gonna treat you the way you deserve. You'll forever be the one who chases. You'll forever be scared to lose him whereas you'll be amazed to see how casual he is about you.
A perfect marriage or relationship is an illusion; there's no universal playbook for making them work. What's effective for one couple may not apply to another. Nevertheless, I've come to understand that there's always a solution to be found. Half a decade ago, my wife and I faced such trials in our marriage that divorce seemed inevitable. Yet, through perseverance and determination, we navigated through the rough waters and emerged stronger, reunited, and more resilient.
There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without him, I love him so much. wish I can get him back I can do anything to have him back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
Its always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is Shelly renee white
He liked me first chose me first, but is bread crumbling me. He always polite with a smile on his face and direct eye contact; however I can see that he's not that into me because he thinks he's the prize!
11:15 How to get chased 1. Be in your feminine energy Get enough sleep Be in tune with herself 2. Be active not reacting Be comfortable with who you are Keep things to yourself "What are we?" "What does this relationship mean?" Don't ask questions like this He needs to take the initiative 3. He needs to see you as the prize 21:22
I’m watching this video over and over again and other ones of yours until I break out of my golden retriever ways and fix my attachment style ! No more calling texting getting ghosted and crying over a guy and losing sleep over someone that isn’t even bothered to send a simple text back ! Goodness what was I thinking🙅🏻♀️🐈⬛
You Get Too Obsessed Too Quickly When You Like Someone... Reasons: - You feel lonely and don't have many people to talk to, or spend time with. Therefore, this person becomes the center of your world because he/she is the only one giving you a little bit of attention... - You're in touch with them all the time, hence habituated - You don't invest enough time and energy in your own goals and hobbies - You seek validation from others instead of being confident about what you bring to the table - They're (most probably) not reciprocating entirely, so you end up chasing (and hurting) more. You're stuck in this loop, and are addicted to it. - You fear letting go and embracing solitude, so you'd much rather hang on to pain that feels familiar!
I think the part about resisting the temptation to close the gap is very important…..Because sometimes we start of with the black cat 🐈⬛ energy but we can’t maintain it as we think if its TOO hard for him or too much chasing he will lose interest. It’s difficult. All the time online we are hearing “don’t chase, don’t react” but until you can fully be in this energy and actually feel it in your body, then you will always believe that a man won’t chase you x
I feel like all my life I was dressing like a black cat for aesthetics because I like it but I wasn't embodying that energy, never realized that my personality was really like a golden retriever.... and this one was a HUGE call out because honestly, this makes so much sense now and I don't know what else should I add.
I hope this advice applies mainly to the dating stages of a relationship, and how to keep your standards and self esteem. I think being all the time like this in a marriage means something is wrong. A marriage is a connection of souls. You cannot be close with someone in this defensive energy. This behaviour means to me you are cautious about letting somebody into your space. Luckily not all men are out there to use you. Some of them are wonderful and caring!
No. My husband has started pampering and giving attention after I am behaving like a black cat. Black cat energy has taken me several notches up nit just with my husband but with my girls, too.
@@nile9150becoming a black cat, detached and concerned with my own happiness/beauty/indulgence, has MASSIVELY improved my marriage. 9 years in a few months, so this is not a new marriage.
I'm absolutely the 'black cat' by nature, at my core, but someone in the last year had started to bring out the worst, anxiously attached side of me. Now the more inconsistency & distance he gives me, the more I reconsider his presence in my life, and why I even liked him, or why I should want anything to do with him. This has been paining me as a form of self betrayal, "golden retriever" energy is not who I am, and I had been playing that role even though it feels awful and I honestly know better... ugh
Be safe, you will never switch 100% on "golden retriever" energy. You are just experiencing the other side to find balance. Cant stay polarized ; life is about evolution, not stagnation.
Girl, same timeline. I forgot who I was, but I worked on getting back to myself. You'll learn the lessons you need, and you'll get back to self. Much love ❤
There are always lessons in these experiences. It took a narcissist, a real textbook goblin, to finally make me see how little I was valuing myself by what I was choosing to allow into my life. I am a good, honest, loving woman. I deserve so much better. I didn't see this until that awful relationship that nearly destroyed me. You will emerge stronger, demand better for yourself and accept nothing less. It's an amazing ride and, as Margarita said, it's precious and so very short. You've got this💚
A friend and I got into a debate over this recently, she said my ideas were 'old fashioned'. Because I said I won't make the first move on a man. She was basically defending her right to be in her masculine energy- which of course is her choice. However...her relationship is dull and she says she feels no passion from her man. She's complained about that for years. Shocker.
I would not consider showing interest and letting a man know you like them to be a bad thing if that's considered to be like making a move. It could be passive with a smile or telling them you are cute etc. That's not making a move. Guys like when girls approach them in this way but after this the guy has to pick the ball and make the move and reciprocating and asking for a date/number etc.
@@anki3336 I agree with you. A signal of interest is fine. She likes to 'change a guys mind' about her. Like actively pursue him. I won't do that as it doesn't feel good to me and you can end up with a lazy unmotivated man who doesn't feel passionately about you. Like said friends current relationship.
You make me feel like a queen each time i listen to you..❤❤❤ I'm a black cat now. I used to be the other one. And it's true, when i got focus on my goals, its when more men take interests on me. I'm married now. It feels so good to feel like a prize.. Women, get busy on your dreams❤ don't make a man a center of your world.. Let them be crazy over you❤️
Thank you Margarita! My mood was low and anxious but after listening to the new episode my mood is light and hopeful. You feel like a safe mentor or friend and your vibe makes me feel so nice
Since following your advice my ex swoons for me again, I’ve opened up more options & the best part is I don’t care about trivial things I’m too busy making myself happy. ♥️ thank you Margarita
Been spiraling out of control lately with my emotions, so I needed this. Time to reset my energy in a way that better fulfills me. Thank you so much. Divine Timing
“Stop! Hammer Time”!!!! Yas preach sista 👏🏾I spent to much time being a Golden Retriever, it’s actually quite embarrassing 😔but it’s time for me to step into my black cat energy 🐈⬛❤
she should have a personal channel for house tours and baby room tours. and shopping finds. and stuff like that. I would love to see that side of margarita because she is so amazing to watch here on youtube.
This video has truly brought in a different kind of energy in me because now that I think of it, I was always the "Golden retriever" and never a "Black Cat". I have now found that hidden divine feminine energy within me. Thank you for sharing :)
This video is amazing Margarita. I wish it existed when I was younger and didn't know myself and constantly chased validation through other people. It is so true - Live for YOU.
If a woman makes me chase her I lose interest. It's boring and basic. I think showing mutual interest in each other is attractive. You don't give away too much too soon, you keep each other mutually interested. No chasing. Men need to know their worth, if they're chasing they probably don't.
@@drunkencitizen6168 Guys who chase women are insecure or have issues they need to deal with. Imo women who want guys to chase them are equally insecure
@@drunkencitizen6168 I agree. If a man's chasing a woman he either wants to bag a 'prize' for one night. OR he's insecure and doesn't know his worth. I feel like women (and men) who want to be chased are equally insecure and come at relationships with an angle of control/mind games from the outset i.e. Red flag.
As someone naturally shy and cold to strangers, I always wondered why men are so much more invested in the conversation when I don't know them vs when I know them and am intentionally making conversation - when this happens the tension/sexual dynamic just disappears. It's definitely that "push/pull" dynamic which is best when the man is pursuing. thank you for this video.
Absolutely loving all these content about black cat energy! If you would be SOOO KIND to do a video focusing more on stay at home wives.. I feel like it’s a Lot easier to embody this black cat concept if you’re just dating or not living together/seeing each every day. You’re doing the lords work, thank you so much for all the tips 💖
Imagine a black cat 🐈⬛ energy in the home … keep it clean, aloof, classy … don’t hover around him - space is good… let him wonder what YOU’RE thinking and doing … work on projects , put AirPods in, say less… make beautiful meals and take pride in your housework
@@heather88888yup all of this! And I would add have a hobby that yours even if you do it from home. And try to have some time with friends every once in a while. Even if it is just brunch or a yoga class with the girls.
Dayummmmm girl! That was so powerful. Life changing. Please do a part 2 just as a reminder. And please do alpha beta omega men explained. You might have already...❤ You are awesome!
You look fabulos in that shirt. I love the allegory of the black cat / golden retriever energy. love your wisdom, insight and spicy self. Thank you, as always for your gret content and no nonsense attitute.
I just loved your Moose on the doorstep analogy! Brilliant. Thanks for being so to the point and succinct - all info I know but need to be remined of sometimes!
Okay but the last part really is the most important. Because i have got this short life and I am worried why whoever is not replying and does not want to commit, gosh it is actually so boring. (The funniest part is the second I pay attention to my life and not his endless bullshit, he comes back in the fastest way possible :)))) )
This is gold ✨ the last one is basically encapsulating the whole vibe. Stop plugging into people and bring your center back to yourself. Thanks for a really good reminder!!
You are sharing some really valuable insights, I particularly liked when you talked about simply letting him know you have these feelings and otherwise not bother and drama about it. Appreciate your content, thank you!
Exactly! If he’s not attentive or pulls away, I don’t push forward, i just go on with my day. They catch on real quick that my behavior is determined by theirs. If you give me attn I will give you mine, it’s that simple
I'm a young woman who probably like everybody else here, had a whole history of being the best golden retriever there is, and of course, that led to suffering and actually losing the person I was interested in. I acted precisely like you described a golden retriever acts, and I ended up confused when that only pushed the other person away. I thought I was nurturing, I didn't know the difference of smothering and nurturing. I decided I want to learn how to properly keep myself safe and act in order to not repeat the cycle I created in the past. It's hard, like you said. But I am willing to put in the effort to be more in tune with my feminine. Thank you for making such an amazing video, I truly enjoyed it and had so much to learn. I cannot wait to learn more from your wisdom.
Yes! I love more frequent chats! This feels like a sisterhood! Thank you! Yes!!! To a podcast about the different types of men and how to interact with them! Have a beautiful day!!!!☀️✨☀️💝
So much wisdom. I love the end. Life is so short we should be enjoying every moment of it and make the best of it. Not living in constant fear. Not being worried and stressed about loosing someone but rather be accepting that what leaves isn't ment for us and makes room for something better to come ❤
Thank you. I’m learning from scratch after 12 years of abusive marriage… The divorce is still ahead but I can’t wait for formalities, the life is so short and precious, just like you wrapped up your podcast! THANK YOU 🙏
There are no unicorns, especially not when it comes to women. Most women are quite boring and bland. Fortunately for women, men do not expect much from them. Men do not chase, especially not high value men. Men do not want to waste their time and women are experts in wasting men's time. If women think that is going to change, they will wait in vain. Men will approach a woman once or twice, if he gets a no, it is over, he will never approach you again. The chasing that women are doing today, is towards chads and f#&k boys, and that is and has always been a waste of time. Chads are not marriage material and you are not going change that by being in a situationship with him for a month or two. The most important thing for a woman to figure out is how attractive she is - objectively (never ask your girlfriends). To do this you take a picture without makeup and ask random guys to rate you. Men are not like women, so they will actually be honest. Most women are average, a 5 out of 10. If you know your number subtract about 2 points, you are probably delusional. This woman who has this channel ie Margarita, she is a 4.5, just below average in my opinion. If she has managed to score a high value man, it must have been to a much older man or a man with confidence issues, or perhaps an Asian. When you know your attractivness number, you can target the guy who you deserve and not waste your time with guys who you don't deserve. A 5 should never go for anything more than a 6 (a guy you think is a 4). It is usually a good idea for a woman, in order to satisfy her hypergamy, to secure a man 1 point higher than herself. Finally, men value youth (below 27), beauty, fertility and purity (low body count 1-4). They do not give 2 sh!ts about your career, job or education. You are very welcome. The 7.
I love the message here, and want to mention the possibility of a Golden Retriever finding another Golden Retriever, or the black cat finding another black cat...because I am quite like the black cat, and I'm definitely not into Golden Retriever energy. It still feels like a game of chase, and I'd rather have energy that matches mine.
As a man with avoidant attachment issues due to past trauma that I'm working on, you just described all the elements that give me peace in a relationship.
Damn girl you’ve got this so RIGHT! I’m 59 yrs old and I’m still learning about this stuff called “men”. I happen to be stupidly caring and this works totally against me. I need to seriously work on this. I’m not controlling but I do tend to cook and just take care for my man. Darn I want to kick myself for over doing this shit. Not any more. I’m in a relationship with a man that says he loves how I show him how much I love and care for him but I don’t want to bore the hell out of him. You just activated my Black Cat mode woman. Thank you!!! ❤
I’ve watched this 5X’s Today… It’s So Good… So Comprehensive…. 🎯 I can See My Old Self and Many other Phases of my Romantic Journey So Clearly in your analogies… This Made me Laugh and Also Gave me a kick in the Ass too! 🙏🏾 Thank you..
Sounds like black cat is an avoidant energy and golden retriever is the anxious attachment energy So... A typical anxious avoidant trap... Isn't it ???
@@SS-rg5di I'm a fearful avoidant so have elements of both, but in the last year have been working hard to heal both my anxious and avoidant elements of my attachment style. It's been amazing how much of a difference that's made in my life, and I'm starting to see what being securely attached can look like.
Margarita, you are a star. Need to listen on repeat😂. Sending to my friend. Sometimes we need this reminder of being in feminine accepting energy. However not an easy task in modern world full of choices and not so masculine man😊. Thank you for the reminder put in wise and humorous way❤
I found this very inspiring. Ive been practicing this for a few months. I no longer chase. I didn't for so long that I was acting like the golden I feel so much better being in my feminine energy. High caliber men are coming to me now. Thank you. 😊
13:40 Made me chuckle..and unfortunately that's exactly what I was doing all along. Really embarassed of myself. Letting his actions decide my emotional well-being is such an L move.
It feels so much better being in my black cat energy; recently went back into my anxious energy and my god it’s been awful! Thank god for Margarita 🙏🏻💗
I have been depressed the last 2 days because you helped me realize I have anxious attachment but listening to your videos make me fee so much better! I have been in masculine energy for years because I allowed my ex husband to put me there and now I'm trying to learn to be in my feminine energy but it's been tough. Had a few slip ups this year.
Good reminder even for those who already know and don’t want to back-slide into gushing emotions/fears, impatience, insecurity, loss, sadness, etc etc. Also got me thinking - Maybe possessive & controlling men could use a similar type of tutorial about how to love a woman and keep her happy in order to get the best out of a relationship.
I have a beautiful black fluffy cat and I can see how her qualities align with this video. Thank you Margarita 🩷 perfectly said. And I also had a little giggle at “painting your hamster’s toenails” 🤣
WOW! You Explained this concept so well! I am keeping this video in my back pocket for the rest of my life. I think almost every woman needs to hear and understand this. Much love to you💓 Thank you!
Scripture. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a (ESV) Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.
Yes, this is good. I've resigned to not giving a f in general. See it, want it, let it go. Keep yourself focused on your peace and your progress on whatever makes you happy.
7 месяцев назад+7
I love your energy and ty for the service you’re providing for us recovering golden retrievers! 🙏🏽♥️😌
It seems women are natural attracters of love and abundance when we relax and know our worth. Every woman I've met who's in their black cat energy seems at peace, not only in relationships but in life.
Thank you for this comment! Just the confirmation I needed ♥️ and yes, it is definitely a thing that woman at peace are in their “black cat energy”
YES✨
> respect your cycle moods bodies signals
> be confident in being alone
> do no be responsive
> Date a little below your league because you are the Prize slightly out of the league
> do not ask them how you feel all the time
> read more on feminine energy
> nurture rather than mother do not control
> do not change people be people who they are
> ask if you like them
> have a life man is just an addition
>do not nag
> don't be afraid to lose the jerks
Thanks for the points !
"don't be afraid to lose jerks"
Dating below your league? Dont agree with that at all. When dating someone below your league , you’ll have 0 respect to this person and you’ll start getting annoyed by their attention. You need to feel and believe like you are HER even though you can be objectively a simple normal girl. Men should be more successful, more rich and so on than their partners imho, but making him feel that you are the queen no matter what is the key. Even though you can be less successful than him. Don’t be in a competition with men who is cooler, richer and so on, but give him the feeling that you are absolutely happy by yourself, with yourself and with your own life. Don’t give him the feeling that he is the prize but act like you are a prize for him even though he is a billionaire and you are a simple girl. Period
@@veronicadani did you even listen to the whole thing? Dating below the league is context with looks not in terms with discipline, money and career growth . When you date a man who thinks he's above everyone because he's handsome they put you down only handful are humble about it. I've just written the pointer you will have to listen the entire vid
@@ds3380 I accidentally addressed your comment specifically, but I watched the entire video and as I understand Margarita meant “below your league in general”, not only looks. But even though if she meant looks i still don’t get it. I like to date someone really handsome cause only this way I can be attracted to them…I chose not a handsome guy once but he ended up being cheater #1, so I don’t really agree with any of that. If I carry myself like a queen and actually am a queen inside than I want the best best option for me, not someone below in any way possible :/
I have a rescued black cat . She is easily spooked, so when she does approach and settle down next to me, it feels like a gift. I just need to personify that cat energy.
She already chose you, you’ve already attained it, congratulations
It's ironic how the whole video talks about chasing the cat but you yourself know that chasing it would spook it, and understand that it has to come to you on its own
Its freaking me out lol bc a black cat just crosser my way out when i was sitting where me and that man im trynna get with use to hang out.
😅❤❤❤❤❤Yes
@@vanetheone8101💯
"You've got alot of things going on in your life and he's an addition to it", love this one!!
Wonderful line ❤
As a former anxiously attached woman, I had to do all of these in order to become more secure today. Great tips!
Could you please tell how long did it take for you to stop being anxiously attached? Thank you
@@Olga0265 It took 2.5 years of consistent therapy (2 times a week for 1 hour each session). Most of the work I did was outside of therapy. So my therapist taught me coping mechanisms and I had to do the work outside of therapy. I still have traces of anxious attachment but that’s normal because it will always linger around.
@@Olga0265 if you don't mind, could you please tell what was the work you did?
@AllUserNamesAreUsed Of course it is possible. It was hard but it’s worth it because I was tired of feeling like I was crazy.
@AllUserNamesAreUsedit’ll come for you when you’re ready to receive it. There’s no “I’ll just always be like this while he goes and so so” what’s for you won’t miss you so what does it matter if he goes on? Then he wasn’t for you
Trust that your time is coming, your healing is happening now
1. Learn about femininity and let them chase
2. Her emotions are active not reactive
13:42 jornal but don’t just complain
3. Don’t close anything
15:13
Be the observer
4. U should be slightly out of his league cause u are the prize
5. 18:50 they are not mama
Don’t control don’t constantly ask how a man is feeling
6.don’t try to change people.let them be and dicide if u want to be with them
7. 20:35 don’t need to make them happy to feel happy yourself.
8. Stop asking if people like you and start asking if you like them
21:30
Make a list why u like him, is it enough?
9. Don’t wait for his call if he didn’t schedule already move on.
10. Don’t nag. Take away energy 26:56
11. Life is so short and precious.
Don’t be afraid to loose anyone
Black Cat energy is not allowing anyone who tries to instill fear and/or makes you anxious. It truly is about not allowing anyone to take you out of your emotions. If there's a vision you see for yourself, even if it's not written on paper, but you visually see it... you go for it.
wouldn’t it be more like not allowing anyone to control your emotions? i’m having trouble understanding “take you out of your emotions”
I was a black cat until I fell in love. I’m trying to be more reserved but at the end I behave as a gold retriever and start chasing him. It’s really hard to control
I'm like that too... and I really don't want to be the one chasing him, it's humiliating...
@adabelindanow this is good advice , I shall be doing this if I feel my golden retriever coming out
Exactly ! We can just be a black cat when we have no feelings at all for the man .
@adabelindaI like this advice
@@sylwia0123 U feeling humiliated while chasing him is a humiliation don't be humiliated to be yourself it's feminine nature to be dependent and chase
“Gosh I bored myself by trying to act like a golden retriever woman” lol
It’s exhausting! 😂 I can’t even do it anymore. I don’t have the strength anyways mentally or physically. But I’m also 48. In my younger years I needed this info x
Same!😅 I wish I had heard this years ago! I would have saved myself so much struggle!!!
@@MrsBrandiSherman 😂😂 unfortunately Margarita with still in her little minky years and the internet didn’t exist. I’m talking like I needed this as a 18 year old 😂 x
😂😂😂
@@lou15176 🤣🤣🤣
i just found your channel i am in a 30 year marriage(high school sweethearts) & I have been the golden retriever the whole time! I am tired... your videos are so helpful, ty...Ladies, its never too late to choose yourself and be the black cat that you were born to be
The funny part is that I was naturally born this way & I was forced to become a golden retriever by the world, even the women in my life! I suffered so much. I went back to being myself during my late 20's since I wasn'tdependenton my family anymore & life just keeps getting sweeter! The same women are jealous now but still refuse to just stop controlling everything lol. I'm so glad you exist! I feel sane, supported & understood. Thank you, God bless you! 💖
In my current relationship I started as a black cat but quickly became a golden retriever and I am becoming the black cat again. We'll see how things go
me too!!! we got this
Me too
Lets do this ladies ❤️
ME TOO!!!! Now I’m an angry black cat. And I want my power back!!
Sameeeeee updates?
what have you been doing to practice this?
I was feeling off this days. Like out of balance. Today the guy I was dating for a Year told that he doesn't want a commitment. I was starting to write that long texts when i Think "i Will See this video first". Thanks You so much for your wisdom. I feel peace now.
Stop sleeping with him. He's not your husband but you stop giving him wife benefits..who knows?
@@danilaroche1156id iot
Brain less ar se
Him: “How come you’re always busy”
Me: “Cause my hamster needs his toenails painted” 🐹 💅🏻
if that was the case you would not be writing this under a 30 min video loool
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@selimaydn8758What’s your excuse?
period.
I’m mostly black cat, but I have been retriever from time to time. Not usually with the man in my life, but with other people in public that I do business with. It’s very seldom, but I have been guilty of losing my temper.
Love this! I really appreciated the example of when a man asks what's wrong you're different and you say "Yeah I'm different. I don't like that you did that. It is what it is. For now that's me. When I'm over it you'll know. That's how I feel" GOLD. I needed that.
Yes! I would love more real life examples!
@@Paulina-yv7gomy ex husband would ogle women in front of me. That’s when my energy would shift and he’d ask and I’d say this 👆🏼and he’d respond by chasing my approval of him.
@@atroxfortunawhat do you mean by your last line? 😮
Moral of the story : be with someone who loves you. Not with who you love. if you liked him first, fell in love with him first and approached him first, he's never ever gonna treat you the way you deserve. You'll forever be the one who chases. You'll forever be scared to lose him whereas you'll be amazed to see how casual he is about you.
Except if you switch mindset and energy.
@@PetiteLicorne I wish I could do this so easily
Totel bs
Sad but true, he always has to love you a little bit more than you love him
@@Veilfire No thats bs
A perfect marriage or relationship is an illusion; there's no universal playbook for making them work. What's effective for one couple may not apply to another. Nevertheless, I've come to understand that there's always a solution to be found. Half a decade ago, my wife and I faced such trials in our marriage that divorce seemed inevitable. Yet, through perseverance and determination, we navigated through the rough waters and emerged stronger, reunited, and more resilient.
There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without him, I love him so much. wish I can get him back I can do anything to have him back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
Its always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is Shelly renee white
This is helpful, I will look her up online right now...Thanks
You wont regret it
How rough is rough? What kind of hurtful... abusive words have been spoken from either party?
He liked me first chose me first, but is bread crumbling me. He always polite with a smile on his face and direct eye contact; however I can see that he's not that into me because he thinks he's the prize!
what did you end up doing?
11:15 How to get chased
1.
Be in your feminine energy
Get enough sleep
Be in tune with herself
2.
Be active not reacting
Be comfortable with who you are
Keep things to yourself
"What are we?"
"What does this relationship mean?"
Don't ask questions like this
He needs to take the initiative
3.
He needs to see you as the prize
21:22
I’m watching this video over and over again and other ones of yours until I break out of my golden retriever ways and fix my attachment style ! No more calling texting getting ghosted and crying over a guy and losing sleep over someone that isn’t even bothered to send a simple text back ! Goodness what was I thinking🙅🏻♀️🐈⬛
Omg sis same ❤ I’ll keep watching these videos until I’m done with the golden retriever era
Time we take our energy back and focus on ourselves 💪🏼
@@aannwwsalam yesss🔥🔥🔥
Same as me I was obsessing with this guy. I need my power back. We can do this, no more texting first and get frustrated
@@2011cindirella EXACTLY!!!👏👏👏
Selling stops at 7:10
Thanks
Thank god 😅
Godsend
Bless your heart❤
I know. It’s a bit more than most channels. Thanks.
Holy shoot. This video just got me over my Limerence.
I was the black cat. And lost it.
Now I want it back!!!! And I’m an angry black cat.
Sameeee
Girl you're the only person on youtube I'm not bored of watching again n again!
You Get Too Obsessed Too Quickly When You Like Someone...
Reasons:
- You feel lonely and don't have many people to talk to, or spend time with.
Therefore, this person becomes the center of your world
because he/she is the only one giving you a little bit of attention...
- You're in touch with them all the time, hence habituated
- You don't invest enough time and energy in your own goals and hobbies
- You seek validation from others instead of being confident about what you bring to the table
- They're (most probably) not reciprocating entirely,
so you end up chasing (and hurting) more.
You're stuck in this loop, and are addicted to it.
- You fear letting go and embracing solitude,
so you'd much rather hang on to pain that feels familiar!
I think the part about resisting the temptation to close the gap is very important…..Because sometimes we start of with the black cat 🐈⬛ energy but we can’t maintain it as we think if its TOO hard for him or too much chasing he will lose interest. It’s difficult. All the time online we are hearing “don’t chase, don’t react” but until you can fully be in this energy and actually feel it in your body, then you will always believe that a man won’t chase you x
I feel like all my life I was dressing like a black cat for aesthetics because I like it but I wasn't embodying that energy, never realized that my personality was really like a golden retriever.... and this one was a HUGE call out because honestly, this makes so much sense now and I don't know what else should I add.
I hope this advice applies mainly to the dating stages of a relationship, and how to keep your standards and self esteem. I think being all the time like this in a marriage means something is wrong. A marriage is a connection of souls. You cannot be close with someone in this defensive energy. This behaviour means to me you are cautious about letting somebody into your space. Luckily not all men are out there to use you. Some of them are wonderful and caring!
Completely agree, you can make good husband go away by this mindset in marriage
@@nile9150 agreed
No. My husband has started pampering and giving attention after I am behaving like a black cat. Black cat energy has taken me several notches up nit just with my husband but with my girls, too.
@@nile9150becoming a black cat, detached and concerned with my own happiness/beauty/indulgence, has MASSIVELY improved my marriage. 9 years in a few months, so this is not a new marriage.
I'm absolutely the 'black cat' by nature, at my core, but someone in the last year had started to bring out the worst, anxiously attached side of me. Now the more inconsistency & distance he gives me, the more I reconsider his presence in my life, and why I even liked him, or why I should want anything to do with him. This has been paining me as a form of self betrayal, "golden retriever" energy is not who I am, and I had been playing that role even though it feels awful and I honestly know better... ugh
I feel you
Be safe, you will never switch 100% on "golden retriever" energy. You are just experiencing the other side to find balance. Cant stay polarized ; life is about evolution, not stagnation.
Girl, same timeline. I forgot who I was, but I worked on getting back to myself. You'll learn the lessons you need, and you'll get back to self. Much love ❤
There are always lessons in these experiences. It took a narcissist, a real textbook goblin, to finally make me see how little I was valuing myself by what I was choosing to allow into my life. I am a good, honest, loving woman. I deserve so much better. I didn't see this until that awful relationship that nearly destroyed me. You will emerge stronger, demand better for yourself and accept nothing less. It's an amazing ride and, as Margarita said, it's precious and so very short. You've got this💚
The fact that nobody talks about the book Women’s Magic Truths on Borlest speaks volumes about how people are stuck in a trance.
botttttt
SCAM !
What ? I didn't understand
A friend and I got into a debate over this recently, she said my ideas were 'old fashioned'. Because I said I won't make the first move on a man. She was basically defending her right to be in her masculine energy- which of course is her choice. However...her relationship is dull and she says she feels no passion from her man. She's complained about that for years. Shocker.
I would not consider showing interest and letting a man know you like them to be a bad thing if that's considered to be like making a move. It could be passive with a smile or telling them you are cute etc. That's not making a move. Guys like when girls approach them in this way but after this the guy has to pick the ball and make the move and reciprocating and asking for a date/number etc.
@@anki3336 I agree with you. A signal of interest is fine. She likes to 'change a guys mind' about her. Like actively pursue him. I won't do that as it doesn't feel good to me and you can end up with a lazy unmotivated man who doesn't feel passionately about you. Like said friends current relationship.
@@jessgirr1728 you judge to much…
Some guys don't ever send the first message.
The best way to make a move is to smile and be warm. If he likes you and he's 'normal' he'll ask 4 a date.
this lipstick shade really suits you
What is it? Love it ❤
her makeup always slays!!
Right? And I love the pink blouse with red stripes 🤌🏼
I was just thinking that when I happened to see your comment 😂
Black cats are sooo unbothered. I love this ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
You make me feel like a queen each time i listen to you..❤❤❤ I'm a black cat now. I used to be the other one. And it's true, when i got focus on my goals, its when more men take interests on me. I'm married now. It feels so good to feel like a prize.. Women, get busy on your dreams❤ don't make a man a center of your world.. Let them be crazy over you❤️
This is where I want to go
Nailed it!
Yes. We’re the center of their world. Not vice versa 😊.
Everytime I feel anxious and start overthinking I listen to you and everything is calm again
Thank you Margarita! My mood was low and anxious but after listening to the new episode my mood is light and hopeful. You feel like a safe mentor or friend and your vibe makes me feel so nice
I deleted these dating coaches i was following and switched to mindset channels like yours and my confidence has skyrocketed and i feel more magnetic.
Perfect timing! 👑 I live in Croatia and it is currently 4pm. I just sat down on the couch with a coffee. Today you are my coffee buddy! 🥰☕🖤🐱
Lep pozdrav, mačka! 💕🐈
(Slovenka v Krakowu)
@@shiatsufurlanahojkyyyy🥰 česka zde
@@Uhhit67 heeey! 🙌💖
Drž se ženo 💯🥺
Since following your advice my ex swoons for me again, I’ve opened up more options & the best part is I don’t care about trivial things I’m too busy making myself happy. ♥️ thank you Margarita
I loved that she said "Stop. Hammer time." So unexpectedly funny 😂
😂😂😂when did she say this I’ve watched it fully but didn’t come across
Many are telling about this
I was looking for this comment 😭I’m literally going to start saying this💀
Been spiraling out of control lately with my emotions, so I needed this. Time to reset my energy in a way that better fulfills me. Thank you so much. Divine Timing
“Stop! Hammer Time”!!!! Yas preach sista 👏🏾I spent to much time being a Golden Retriever, it’s actually quite embarrassing 😔but it’s time for me to step into my black cat energy 🐈⬛❤
she should have a personal channel for house tours and baby room tours. and shopping finds. and stuff like that. I would love to see that side of margarita because she is so amazing to watch here on youtube.
I never knew I am a black cat 🐈⬛️ I actually deal with men exactly like that
'youve got crochet lessons and you are painting your hamsters toenails' im DEAD!!!!
I literally just screamed at this part😂😂
RIP in peace
I need to remember this sentence for the next time someone invites me to something I dont want to go to hahahahha
I screamed at this part too wahahahha!
😂😂😂😂😂
This video has truly brought in a different kind of energy in me because now that I think of it, I was always the "Golden retriever" and never a "Black Cat". I have now found that hidden divine feminine energy within me. Thank you for sharing :)
This video is amazing Margarita. I wish it existed when I was younger and didn't know myself and constantly chased validation through other people. It is so true - Live for YOU.
I love the black cat/golden retriever imagery. Super clear, and fun, too. Thanks so much Margarita! 😁
Video starts at 7:26
Hello moosy here 😂😂😂😂 you are so funny sometimes.
Thank you soooo much , I’ve been the golden retriever lately, thank you for reaching me truly . It’s time to change !
Really tho!! If a man aint chasing you like a puppy then he doesn’t really like you
Or he is a fboi.
He may like you but doesn't want you.
If a woman makes me chase her I lose interest. It's boring and basic. I think showing mutual interest in each other is attractive. You don't give away too much too soon, you keep each other mutually interested. No chasing. Men need to know their worth, if they're chasing they probably don't.
@@drunkencitizen6168 Guys who chase women are insecure or have issues they need to deal with. Imo women who want guys to chase them are equally insecure
@@drunkencitizen6168 I agree. If a man's chasing a woman he either wants to bag a 'prize' for one night. OR he's insecure and doesn't know his worth. I feel like women (and men) who want to be chased are equally insecure and come at relationships with an angle of control/mind games from the outset i.e. Red flag.
As someone naturally shy and cold to strangers, I always wondered why men are so much more invested in the conversation when I don't know them vs when I know them and am intentionally making conversation - when this happens the tension/sexual dynamic just disappears. It's definitely that "push/pull" dynamic which is best when the man is pursuing. thank you for this video.
Absolutely loving all these content about black cat energy! If you would be SOOO KIND to do a video focusing more on stay at home wives.. I feel like it’s a Lot easier to embody this black cat concept if you’re just dating or not living together/seeing each every day.
You’re doing the lords work, thank you so much for all the tips 💖
Imagine a black cat 🐈⬛ energy in the home … keep it clean, aloof, classy … don’t hover around him - space is good… let him wonder what YOU’RE thinking and doing … work on projects , put AirPods in, say less… make beautiful meals and take pride in your housework
@@heather88888yup all of this! And I would add have a hobby that yours even if you do it from home. And try to have some time with friends every once in a while. Even if it is just brunch or a yoga class with the girls.
Dayummmmm girl! That was so powerful. Life changing. Please do a part 2 just as a reminder. And please do alpha beta omega men explained. You might have already...❤
You are awesome!
It would awesome to curate movies and books that demonstrate this Black cat woman for reference ..❤
You look fabulos in that shirt.
I love the allegory of the black cat / golden retriever energy.
love your wisdom, insight and spicy self.
Thank you, as always for your gret content and no nonsense attitute.
I just loved your Moose on the doorstep analogy! Brilliant. Thanks for being so to the point and succinct - all info I know but need to be remined of sometimes!
Okay but the last part really is the most important.
Because i have got this short life and I am worried why whoever is not replying and does not want to commit, gosh it is actually so boring.
(The funniest part is the second I pay attention to my life and not his endless bullshit, he comes back in the fastest way possible :)))) )
This is gold ✨ the last one is basically encapsulating the whole vibe. Stop plugging into people and bring your center back to yourself. Thanks for a really good reminder!!
You are sharing some really valuable insights, I particularly liked when you talked about simply letting him know you have these feelings and otherwise not bother and drama about it. Appreciate your content, thank you!
Exactly! If he’s not attentive or pulls away, I don’t push forward, i just go on with my day. They catch on real quick that my behavior is determined by theirs. If you give me attn I will give you mine, it’s that simple
So spot on- with or without I’m going to be ok ✨ cuz everything works out for me in this glimmer of a life.
I'm a young woman who probably like everybody else here, had a whole history of being the best golden retriever there is, and of course, that led to suffering and actually losing the person I was interested in. I acted precisely like you described a golden retriever acts, and I ended up confused when that only pushed the other person away. I thought I was nurturing, I didn't know the difference of smothering and nurturing.
I decided I want to learn how to properly keep myself safe and act in order to not repeat the cycle I created in the past. It's hard, like you said. But I am willing to put in the effort to be more in tune with my feminine. Thank you for making such an amazing video, I truly enjoyed it and had so much to learn. I cannot wait to learn more from your wisdom.
Yes! I love more frequent chats! This feels like a sisterhood! Thank you! Yes!!! To a podcast about the different types of men and how to interact with them! Have a beautiful day!!!!☀️✨☀️💝
I love the sisterhood idea ❤
So much wisdom.
I love the end.
Life is so short we should be enjoying every moment of it and make the best of it.
Not living in constant fear. Not being worried and stressed about loosing someone but rather be accepting that what leaves isn't ment for us and makes room for something better to come ❤
Thank you. I’m learning from scratch after 12 years of abusive marriage… The divorce is still ahead but I can’t wait for formalities, the life is so short and precious, just like you wrapped up your podcast! THANK YOU 🙏
This video came to me at the right moment feminine energy always lives in the present moment that’s why we are the gift 🎁 present for masculine ❤
You're honestly one of the best women I listen to. I wish I had someone like you in my family to get inspired from.
I'm just going to be a Unicorn 🦄💖
😂😂
Hahahaha
There are no unicorns, especially not when it comes to women. Most women are quite boring and bland. Fortunately for women, men do not expect much from them. Men do not chase, especially not high value men. Men do not want to waste their time and women are experts in wasting men's time. If women think that is going to change, they will wait in vain. Men will approach a woman once or twice, if he gets a no, it is over, he will never approach you again. The chasing that women are doing today, is towards chads and f#&k boys, and that is and has always been a waste of time. Chads are not marriage material and you are not going change that by being in a situationship with him for a month or two. The most important thing for a woman to figure out is how attractive she is - objectively (never ask your girlfriends). To do this you take a picture without makeup and ask random guys to rate you. Men are not like women, so they will actually be honest. Most women are average, a 5 out of 10. If you know your number subtract about 2 points, you are probably delusional. This woman who has this channel ie Margarita, she is a 4.5, just below average in my opinion. If she has managed to score a high value man, it must have been to a much older man or a man with confidence issues, or perhaps an Asian. When you know your attractivness number, you can target the guy who you deserve and not waste your time with guys who you don't deserve. A 5 should never go for anything more than a 6 (a guy you think is a 4). It is usually a good idea for a woman, in order to satisfy her hypergamy, to secure a man 1 point higher than herself. Finally, men value youth (below 27), beauty, fertility and purity (low body count 1-4). They do not give 2 sh!ts about your career, job or education. You are very welcome. The 7.
🦄💕
Me too
What a QUEEN... I'm blessed with advice like this
I love the message here, and want to mention the possibility of a Golden Retriever finding another Golden Retriever, or the black cat finding another black cat...because I am quite like the black cat, and I'm definitely not into Golden Retriever energy. It still feels like a game of chase, and I'd rather have energy that matches mine.
This! Thank you for bringing this up!
"Don't let anyone take you out of your emotions " wow beautifully said
As a man with avoidant attachment issues due to past trauma that I'm working on, you just described all the elements that give me peace in a relationship.
I have anxious attachment I need to work on this I feel my gf is avoidant so idk how to apply this
Damn girl you’ve got this so RIGHT! I’m 59 yrs old and I’m still learning about this stuff called “men”. I happen to be stupidly caring and this works totally against me. I need to seriously work on this. I’m not controlling but I do tend to cook and just take care for my man. Darn I want to kick myself for over doing this shit. Not any more. I’m in a relationship with a man that says he loves how I show him how much I love and care for him but I don’t want to bore the hell out of him. You just activated my Black Cat mode woman. Thank you!!! ❤
You being a black cat at 27:25 !!!busy observing birds outside like cats do lol love it😆
You don’t realise how amazing and life changing your videos are… you are the best on RUclips that I’ve come across for helping women
this video is GOLDEN
literally used these tips for one day and saw results….its so hard to change I know it’ll get better if I’m consistent
I’ve watched this 5X’s Today… It’s So Good… So Comprehensive…. 🎯 I can See My Old Self and Many other Phases of my Romantic Journey So Clearly in your analogies…
This Made me Laugh and Also Gave me a kick in the Ass too!
🙏🏾 Thank you..
Never be afraid to loose a man. The wrong man only drains you
I've been the golden retriever for a long time and I'm over it, watching this video to learn how to be the black cat instead.
Noooo we need more puppy boys. Who else is gonna worship me. Yall are my type
Sounds like black cat is an avoidant energy and golden retriever is the anxious attachment energy
So... A typical anxious avoidant trap... Isn't it ???
@@SS-rg5di I'm a fearful avoidant so have elements of both, but in the last year have been working hard to heal both my anxious and avoidant elements of my attachment style. It's been amazing how much of a difference that's made in my life, and I'm starting to see what being securely attached can look like.
I love your energy, thank you for taking the time to teach us girlies how to live our lives with more Passion and love and less attachment 🙏🏼✨
Margarita, you are a star. Need to listen on repeat😂. Sending to my friend. Sometimes we need this reminder of being in feminine accepting energy. However not an easy task in modern world full of choices and not so masculine man😊. Thank you for the reminder put in wise and humorous way❤
“Hello Roberta” 🤣 You are pure gold. 💫
This was classic😂
I found this very inspiring. Ive been practicing this for a few months. I no longer chase. I didn't for so long that I was acting like the golden I feel so much better being in my feminine energy. High caliber men are coming to me now. Thank you. 😊
I just adore you, you've helped me come into myself/less in my masculine over the past 2 years, thank you so much.
Beautiful glimmer of life within the delight in your words.
13:40 Made me chuckle..and unfortunately that's exactly what I was doing all along. Really embarassed of myself. Letting his actions decide my emotional well-being is such an L move.
It feels so much better being in my black cat energy; recently went back into my anxious energy and my god it’s been awful! Thank god for Margarita 🙏🏻💗
You speak so much depth and true gems. That i had to subscribe to your content and send this to my daughter. ❤
I have been depressed the last 2 days because you helped me realize I have anxious attachment but listening to your videos make me fee so much better! I have been in masculine energy for years because I allowed my ex husband to put me there and now I'm trying to learn to be in my feminine energy but it's been tough. Had a few slip ups this year.
Please do video on Alpha men. I am married to one and I would love to learn more about being in a relationship with one.
Lmfao
Sending you thoughts and prayers ❤
Men are supposed to be alpha men...
Good reminder even for those who already know and don’t want to back-slide into gushing emotions/fears, impatience, insecurity, loss, sadness, etc etc. Also got me thinking - Maybe possessive & controlling men could use a similar type of tutorial about how to love a woman and keep her happy in order to get the best out of a relationship.
I soooooo needed this!😢
The animal analogy is spot on. Thank you for this. Divine timing ❤
love your chill way to talk, you have a very chill aura
I have a beautiful black fluffy cat and I can see how her qualities align with this video. Thank you Margarita 🩷 perfectly said. And I also had a little giggle at “painting your hamster’s toenails” 🤣
WOW! You Explained this concept so well! I am keeping this video in my back pocket for the rest of my life. I think almost every woman needs to hear and understand this. Much love to you💓
Thank you!
Oh this is a masterpiece really needed this
Scripture. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a (ESV) Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.
Right on time. Thank you for sharing your gifts through your voice with all of us.
Yes, this is good. I've resigned to not giving a f in general. See it, want it, let it go. Keep yourself focused on your peace and your progress on whatever makes you happy.
I love your energy and ty for the service you’re providing for us recovering golden retrievers! 🙏🏽♥️😌