Female Narcissist 17 Red Flags Why Hard To Leave

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  • Опубликовано: 1 окт 2024

Комментарии • 1,2 тыс.

  • @AnitaBarneycastle
    @AnitaBarneycastle 4 года назад +146

    There is something "off" with these people. My gut was becoming almost nauseous around the narcissists dark energies.

    • @drewtrulock333
      @drewtrulock333 4 года назад +3

      The one i was with said her ex bf was really dark...that should've sent me to the hills i guess but i stayed... yikes 🤓

    • @marioperic7482
      @marioperic7482 3 года назад +4

      Apsolutely agree with you!
      They are cruel, sadistic and when they enter the room it's as if a dark cloud of doom came along with them... yet why does it feel hard for one to leave despite everything bad they have encountered with them?
      For me it's the love-bombing persona I fell in love with that in the end was a false persona ofcourse but I still have to say that to myself everyday and convince me that she was never for me... it's hard but the reminder of her ultimate decision and that negative energy that my narc carries on even today without me (everywhere she is) keeps me straight in the head to move forward until I ultimately forget her!

    • @littlefairyfly
      @littlefairyfly 3 года назад +3

      Girl I feel you, my naive stupid ass thought it was butterflies.. now I know better

    • @empresszoe9351
      @empresszoe9351 3 года назад +3

      I literally have vomited after spending time with a narcissist.

  • @enlightenedone7083
    @enlightenedone7083 7 лет назад +428

    Run away as fast as you can & do not look back. I don't care if she's the most beautiful woman in the world.

    • @reettaelina
      @reettaelina 7 лет назад

      ruclips.net/video/AmO4GYReyys/видео.html

    • @davidgraham8840
      @davidgraham8840 6 лет назад +25

      Michelle Carpenter True. Beauty doesn't matter. Even the Devil himself started out as a beautiful angel. (Ezek. 28:13-17) Narcissists share a lot of traits associated with the Devil- lying, manipulation, arrogance, deception, using others to achieve their ends while they hide in the shadows.

    • @Drewzdev
      @Drewzdev 6 лет назад

      ruclips.net/video/fjHGTeTtaac/видео.html

    • @MOREBEATSTV
      @MOREBEATSTV 6 лет назад +31

      Sometimes we put ourselves through that type of treatment because the woman might be gorgeous and she is giving us consistent sex. In the long run the relationship will completely take you away from your purpose in life. You will fall into depression and you might even commit suicide. It's really that serious. Gotta use discernment early on.

    • @tracyovercomer
      @tracyovercomer 6 лет назад

      Circa 84 Best response! Soo True!

  • @corsicanlulu
    @corsicanlulu 7 лет назад +460

    dont marry anyone who doesnt reciprocate what u give them period!!!

    • @AnitaBarneycastle
      @AnitaBarneycastle 6 лет назад +8

      corsican lulu I figured that out...and REFUSED to get married.

    • @car1it05WAY
      @car1it05WAY 6 лет назад +6

      Get out asap

    • @TheOriginalGankstar
      @TheOriginalGankstar 5 лет назад +2

      How can you possibly expect me to give you period in return? We can marry when you reach 50 if you like?

    • @marcolojewskijr.4165
      @marcolojewskijr.4165 5 лет назад +7

      I wish I would have known this before I gave my ex wife 30 years of trying to be what she thought I should be and begging her cra-craness for her approval and to be heard! I have literally have said the exact same thing I wanted for 22 years and never getting it but her giving it to another guy and coming home to brag about it and I was told to get over it! But the great news is I know better now! I wish the next guy good luck!

    • @MrGuy-cp1gt
      @MrGuy-cp1gt 5 лет назад +2

      Another man junk is another man's gold, the ex, they are called satans sirens, looking for all the salutes from ALL men , good news no woman in heaven

  • @jakefeisel7348
    @jakefeisel7348 5 лет назад +91

    A toxic relationship just becomes more and more poisonous over time get out before you are completely destroyed.

    • @puscifer99
      @puscifer99 3 года назад

      Over a long period of time, the emotional turns into physical abuse.

  • @walterwhite751
    @walterwhite751 7 лет назад +342

    Controlling !!!!!!
    Raging
    Silent treatments
    Never communicate.
    Never give just take

    • @MultiFreddy34
      @MultiFreddy34 6 лет назад +12

      Walter White that's it in a nutshell.

    • @marcelogouveia9614
      @marcelogouveia9614 6 лет назад +24

      Ah... also, even if they know they made any kind of mistakes;
      THEY WILL NEVER APOLOGIZE!!!

    • @mentalhibees
      @mentalhibees 6 лет назад +26

      never take account for their actions
      never wrong
      very critical
      can't take criticism

    • @JohnDoe-id1es
      @JohnDoe-id1es 6 лет назад +9

      Marcelo Gouveia and when u logically break down their irrational behavior, and they finally do apologize, they scream "Fine- You're Right. You Win! ARE YOU HAAAAAPPPPPPYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????!!!!" ( and you're like- wtf? smh)

    • @AnitaBarneycastle
      @AnitaBarneycastle 6 лет назад +2

      yes!

  • @plisskin83
    @plisskin83 5 лет назад +129

    This kid is actually really lucky to be learning this lesson so early in life. I’m 36 and just got away from a female narcissist after 10 months of hell. This coaching is scary accurate. Michele is on point.

    • @nopcshere6097
      @nopcshere6097 4 года назад +13

      I was 47 when I escaped from an emotionally abusive, narcissistic wife and her equally abusive, narcissistic mother and father. I would love to be 36 again and re-live those years narc-free. Now, at least I have a life again that does not revolve around narcissistic elderly in-laws and a narcissistic wife who put her NMom and NDad ahead of the marriage.

    • @jasonalbania2060
      @jasonalbania2060 4 года назад +10

      I'm 38 now... Man I already had two. Got married age of 31,it lasted 6 BS years before I finally got out... 2 years before I finally recover. Then had this recent relationshit... Another narc. What in a world I always attract this kind of woman. I wish all the best for all those man who loved faithfully and true. May God help us to find the right one for us. 🙏

    • @kevinseraphimday6373
      @kevinseraphimday6373 4 года назад

      Right? I ENVY him...in a good way of course 😁

    • @kevinseraphimday6373
      @kevinseraphimday6373 4 года назад +2

      @@jasonalbania2060 66 here and counting mom, I got FIVE. Not trying to "one-up" you, just warning you that you have to work REALLY hard at becoming and maintaining AWARENESS whenever you enter any kind of relationship with ANYONE because if you want a good life, there's no room ANYWHERE in your life life for a narc because like a single bacteria, they'll make you ILL!

    • @Floatingaccidentallike
      @Floatingaccidentallike 3 года назад +1

      Your a grown up but glad you got away.

  • @nyias6576
    @nyias6576 7 лет назад +137

    My narc never apologizes but will say she did. All the time

    • @oroville12345
      @oroville12345 6 лет назад +10

      Nyia S gaslighting

    • @kylemcampbellii
      @kylemcampbellii 6 лет назад +6

      Mine did that crap all the time.

    • @dwalter2259
      @dwalter2259 5 лет назад +10

      Omg my ex did the same thing and when I tell her the problem she changes my words to benefit her. That pisses me off. I'm like those aren't the words I use and that's not what I'm talking about. It's crazy but I'm glad it's over, it was draining me

    • @johnym.8878
      @johnym.8878 5 лет назад +4

      Mine couldnt write-I am sorry, even when I told her she doesnt have to mean it. Just write it and its all good. She couldnt. Oh yes, she slept with another man, because I caused her Narc injury. And the reason she did it, its so stupid, you wouldnt believe it. God had a good laugh on this one, but this was a lesson of the lifetime. I still feel blessed, and pain that came with this lesson was worth it. God bless you all.

    • @borosinyas2648
      @borosinyas2648 4 года назад

      Right now if he she abuse you then 123456789 years he she going to apologize if it's laten then he she going apologies to you

  • @TheRealest127
    @TheRealest127 6 лет назад +13

    I just left a 3 Year relationship with Toxic Narcissist. She NEVER Apologized or said she was sorry whenever she was wrong. Then I Realized. Narcissists must see being wrong as a WEAKNESS. Instead of seeing it as just being HUMAN Like the rest of us. But they must not think they’re Human. They must think they’re MORE than human. TRULY Egotistical. Smh.

  • @primalself9232
    @primalself9232 7 лет назад +213

    Looks fade, but narcs don't get better.

    • @Tony-dh
      @Tony-dh 7 лет назад +17

      Primal Self my girlfriend aged 20 years in ten. Blames me for that as well.

    • @Obliv69
      @Obliv69 6 лет назад +18

      they are like milk, the older they get the more sour they become

    • @jasimsyriac1445
      @jasimsyriac1445 4 года назад +1

      Mine don't have looks

    • @wisdomgoddess2666
      @wisdomgoddess2666 4 года назад +2

      I don't understand narcissistic women are rated hot but some are just exaggerated.. people think they are attractive but they are superficial and not at all natural beauty.. they waste too much money on grooming that's it!

    • @BalticLab
      @BalticLab 4 года назад +2

      They actually get worse and more bitter the older they get. Because the games they were able to pull at 20, they can't anymore at 40. And the secondary supplies they could always Hoover back in at 20, also went away. And even though they appear over confident, they're highly insecure and its difficult for them to reel in new supply if they have to be active. If the guy approaches then and reacts to her teasing, it's not problem for her. But the nature of things is, at 20 she had a lot of guys approach her, at 40 not so much anymore. And the f boys that only want sex that she had in her 20s, still have 20 year old women for that. Imagine your beauty is your primary tool to get supply. Imagine how grim aging looks. The male narc can get more successfull as he gets older. Of he uses money to impress people, his age is secondary. Now this is assuming a covert female. And females tend to usually come more often in the covert form.

  • @Jcastro9444
    @Jcastro9444 5 лет назад +14

    I feel the best weapon against a narcissist woman besides no contact is that you have to keep a very masculine frame at ALL times around her. Like rarely complimenting her if ever,little to no validation,boundries and not tolerating their shit,knowing your value at all times. It's funny I look back at it now,I always did this and it definitely challenged her and got her emotional with anger texts. I left the relationship so I know I played her game and beat her in it.

  • @justsomedude6455
    @justsomedude6455 5 лет назад +37

    Their good side is so good, so well adapted to fit your individual needs. Letting go of that false self is the hardest part. Accepting that you wasted YEARS of your life on someone who was just playing you, using you as an emotional doormat. Dear self, forgive me.

  • @walterwhite751
    @walterwhite751 7 лет назад +150

    They never aknowledge anything.
    Always the victim.
    Being afraid of their rages.

    • @marioperic7482
      @marioperic7482 3 года назад +2

      No self reflection, no look in the inside, no realization of their inner-selfs... they are stuck in the past, still even today acting as a victim and for future always planning evil schemes on easy prey and targets!

  • @quietmike4791
    @quietmike4791 6 лет назад +85

    "I don't remember", "You just don't believe me", "That never happened" any of these sound familiar?

    • @bosschedda_
      @bosschedda_ 5 лет назад +2

      Sure do

    • @justinkinter8651
      @justinkinter8651 5 лет назад +4

      God its unreal how they're all the same, all three of these were fed to me and I ate each one up multiple times. On top of silent treatment, on top of putting their entire weight of blame on me, on top of telling me this is all my fault for falling in love with her and it's only going this way because I'm crazy

    • @knoble1985
      @knoble1985 4 года назад

      @Tony Macaroni Was told that all the time

    • @deshawnthornton372
      @deshawnthornton372 4 года назад

      Yes!!

    • @enstrop
      @enstrop 4 года назад

      Also: "it s your imagination" " I don t reply" "you are too sensitive" "this is last time we talk"

  • @FullPowerMasteryWithRa
    @FullPowerMasteryWithRa 6 лет назад +51

    Thank you for acknowledging the fact that men suffer emotional abuse from narc women too. I appreciate that. As a man, it's hard to call these things 'abuse' when it IS and it can be so painful and traumatic to be in these kinds of relationships when you are trying to make the best of the person you are with.
    I want to add one bit to the red-flag when she was disregarding his feelings. She also 'emasculated' him which is never acceptable in a romantic partner and relationship. That too is a form of emotional abuse. Comments from a romantic female partner where she is emasculating or putting down his masculinity or otherwise 'hitting below the belt' is never acceptable. Infact it is emotional AND psychological abuse. In his case it was a double blow. Her remark was emasculating and also disregarding his feelings and needs. Tripple blow actually because then theirs the lack of 'respect' that tops it all off.

    • @tigerlillypearse8831
      @tigerlillypearse8831 4 года назад

      Black Swan Education yes, my mum is a narcissist. My dad is so henpecked. It’s horrible.

  • @walterwhite751
    @walterwhite751 7 лет назад +95

    An npd does something wrong to you and when you mention it they are mad at YOU and mistreat you.

    • @jasonbotting3666
      @jasonbotting3666 7 лет назад +7

      Walter White and I was the one saying sorry and feeling bad....a complete mind f#@k

    • @raycooper3940
      @raycooper3940 7 лет назад +2

      Walter White so right

    • @FirstLast-js3ip
      @FirstLast-js3ip 6 лет назад +1

      Walter White checks out

    • @ratherbenapping10
      @ratherbenapping10 5 лет назад +1

      YES

    • @marioperic7482
      @marioperic7482 3 года назад +2

      When I tried to tell my female narc how I feel after she discarded me she threatened to call the police on me... can you believe that?
      No closure man, they think they are always right in their mind and they can go on doing freely whatever they want in this God-damn world!
      Many times I wish there was a prison for these kind of people to keep them away from society: a true menace they are!

  • @nicbro3831
    @nicbro3831 4 года назад +41

    I remember saying to my ex "it's like we can never be on the same page. When I'm happy you're unhappy and when I'm sad you're happy." Its taken all these years to realize that he was doing that on purpose. Seriously sick.

    • @starlingswallow
      @starlingswallow 4 года назад +2

      YES! It was like a see saw! 😡 I see it so clear now...

    • @lilkr8844
      @lilkr8844 3 года назад +1

      Run ,run for your life and don't look back!!!!!!!!!!👍

  • @TheVermifuge
    @TheVermifuge 4 года назад +43

    I called her an “angel”, and she literally said that she is “Satan”... I should’ve known right then and there what she truly was.

    • @crisclay2678
      @crisclay2678 4 года назад +1

      Instrumedley lol is this serious ?

    • @Marixpress2
      @Marixpress2 4 года назад +8

      When people tell you who they are, believe them 🙌

    • @drewtrulock333
      @drewtrulock333 4 года назад +1

      Yikes

    • @kdark6309
      @kdark6309 4 года назад

      Omg she said the same to me in the beginning of our relationship that she is a demon as a joke

    • @TheVermifuge
      @TheVermifuge 4 года назад +1

      NEVER take it lightly. Its evils cunning way of letting you know the truth.

  • @tev57
    @tev57 7 лет назад +147

    Thank you Michele and all of you guys for showing compassion to my case . I left her, now I m more concentrating on my self and work. Thanks again I really appreciate your warm feelings.

    • @orchidsrising7910
      @orchidsrising7910 6 лет назад +7

      Ahmed Kamal Happy to hear. I left a message above for you... Much love 💗🌸🦋... You will find much joy... At first, it’s an internal journey, well worth it. And always stick with the kind (hearted)... Woman friends are a great way to get to know women and understand all the different personality types so you choose well. You will find a hotter chic 🌸

    • @rryphill4408
      @rryphill4408 6 лет назад +8

      You dodged a Bullet and will see it in the future...peace to you.

    • @Yesindeed-sd7ju
      @Yesindeed-sd7ju 5 лет назад +3

      Are you doing okay cuz?

    • @trishtv8310
      @trishtv8310 5 лет назад +7

      We saved one!!!!!!!! Thank you LORD!

    • @KingofgraceSARA
      @KingofgraceSARA 4 года назад +4

      Thank God!
      You did yourself a lifetime favor.
      Cheers, for your strength send courage.
      Find someone who wants to communicate, encourage you, be empathetic and interested in your interests.

  • @elijahjames8837
    @elijahjames8837 6 лет назад +44

    She doesn't want the relationship to work because it is through the use of emotional chaos that the narcissist is able to sink their fangs in to suck their victim dry. In other words, narcissists are emotional vampires who suck their victims dry while trying to fill the emotional void within them.

  • @eznosnopes5276
    @eznosnopes5276 7 лет назад +47

    Such great advice.
    There is nothing to fix with the person in this letter. Walk away even if it hurts. No amount of hotness is worth losing your sanity. Hold your head up, walk away with some dignity and plan your escape.

  • @corsicanlulu
    @corsicanlulu 7 лет назад +45

    also if ur always arguing when dating?....how will it magically get better in marriage? it definitely wont. if u dont like the person, how can u stay married to them for life? it just cant work

  • @walterwhite751
    @walterwhite751 7 лет назад +55

    3.5 years with a female npd. Off and on 20x due to her ridiculousness. Ay the drop of a hat her mood would change and her behavior would be raging and flipping out over NOTHING

    • @FirstLast-js3ip
      @FirstLast-js3ip 6 лет назад +2

      Walter White it's something and ur close to finding out ...hahahahhahhahhahahahahhahah ...yup they sense it and they will show it and u will be projected on

    • @billg9502
      @billg9502 6 лет назад +2

      Walter White /I hate to sell and move but I lived with this woman thats a narc and has a medical condition. She knows that I am a empath . A nightmare but not my wife .

    • @billg9502
      @billg9502 6 лет назад +1

      Walter White / She won,t leave.

  • @kendu5636
    @kendu5636 5 лет назад +7

    Don’t deny your intuition like I did. It killed me. In the end I knew it was correct. The worst was my regret for not following my gut. Drop her fast. Guaranteed bad news. I’ve been there and still suffer from it! Never assume others have your integrity. They don’t!

  • @buddyduddyful
    @buddyduddyful 5 лет назад +52

    Western society promotes female narcissism as a way to empower Woman.

    • @KingofgraceSARA
      @KingofgraceSARA 4 года назад +5

      Screw femnazi-ism.
      Sincerely, an American woman.

    • @drewtrulock333
      @drewtrulock333 4 года назад +1

      I agree it gives certain women who want to abuse that power the victim card which they can go to extreme members to smear an ex really yikes stuff

    • @android584
      @android584 4 года назад +2

      Viewing men as disposable commodities to be used up seems to be encouraged more than accepting men for who they are are and working with them to start a healthy family. Our birth rate is below replacement level for a reason.
      Of course men are encouraged to be immature, feminised porn addicts too.

  • @karent3004
    @karent3004 7 лет назад +38

    To the young man here: you are brave for putting your life experience out for all to see. Please know that so many of us have been exactly where you are and some of us would have given anything to have someone like Michelle or others here to talk with and point out these red flags that we ignored . We didn't listen to our own intuition and we were burned. It can take years off your life when you get tangled up with these types and you'll wonder where your life went. Protect your heart honey...

    • @chowdaheadmick2963
      @chowdaheadmick2963 6 лет назад +8

      Thank you, Karen T! Your comment is very much appreciated! Oftentimes, when men describe how horrible female narcs are, we are accused of being mean, angry or slandering them because their abuse is so cruel and heartless... It's that unbelievable... The more you describe their behavior, the crazier you sound! This is why I've been reluctant to speak out. There is an inherent bias in society where men are seen as the abusers by default and women as the victims regardless of what the facts are. I think this bias is a product of a false "Battle of the Sexes" idea. It's total BS. I was happily married for nearly two decades with no drama whatsoever -because we were two normal, well adjusted adults. But female narcs use this bias to great effect in the courts and workplace as they slander and smear men who don't give them what they want. Again, narcissistic abuse has nothing to do with gender or sex! Narcs can be male or female, gay or straight. This is an invisible war between normals/empaths and Cluster B psychos!!! When are the US courts going to get a clue and start holding these monsters accountable like they do in Europe?

    • @audreyandrea460
      @audreyandrea460 Год назад

      I notice your comment is from 5 years ago, and if you happen to see my late reply here, I just want to say that I think things are changing a bit, now. Recently the Johnny Depp versus Amber Heard case was very high profile, and it was important in showing the whole world the reality of female abusers. Johnny Depp is a handsome, rich man with many friends and he still couldn’t get away from her. The courts were in his favour. I think it has helped a little. At least it’s better late than never.

  • @cherbug1197
    @cherbug1197 7 лет назад +33

    Love your channel Michelle! This resonates with my male narc. 100%. He has hoovering me, but I've been ignoring him. I stayed far too long because he's hot and at times could be so charming. My family and friends didn't like him, and was watching ME disappear. I moved out two months ago and am staying strong, thanks to these types of channels.

  • @peanut9863
    @peanut9863 7 лет назад +33

    Highly narcissistic people are terrible at communicating. They have zero ability to speak about and address issues that come up; that is if you aren’t on the receiving end of the silent treatment. They are great at playing mind games and manipulating you. It doesn’t matter how attractive she is; this young man needs to realize that his girlfriend is unhealthy. You are so right about looks; Michelle. I always look at couples and think about the obvious disparity because often it is significant.Things will only get worse. Just walk away!

    • @Obliv69
      @Obliv69 6 лет назад +2

      if they do show any interest its only so they can use it as ammunition against you in the most humiliating way, as a way of breaking you and putting you back in your place. Like revealing something deep you shared with them in a public setting to other people at a totally inappropriate time so you feel put back and shamed.
      the M.O. is always the same. Lie, deny, shift the blame onto others. make yourself to be the victim. rage one minute, walk off laughing, then come back crying to make you feel bad.

  • @iaap123
    @iaap123 6 лет назад +66

    To the young man who wants to marry the "hot" one - three words: DON'T DO IT!!

    • @charlescastro5788
      @charlescastro5788 4 года назад +2

      Totally true Man, i noticed that narcisist traits are More common in hot women, i dated this really hot chick (she even did Some modeling in her spare Time) for about 5 months, the first month was amazing, she really treated me like i was special and important, but after that it became hell, it was just true narcisistic behaviour. The fun part, if that even when i dumped her, i still miss her and i still attached to her even when i know how a bad person she was to me. Man narcs are addictive, be careful.

    • @drewtrulock333
      @drewtrulock333 4 года назад

      Yes dad

  • @tibeerius1967
    @tibeerius1967 5 лет назад +10

    I’m glad that there is finally recognition that it’s not just the male that can be a narcissist. That we also suffer too.

    • @audreyandrea460
      @audreyandrea460 Год назад

      This is a late comment, for sure. Yes, I agree with you that it’s good that men are recognized as victims of female narcissists and female abusers. I want to expand on your point and also add that female narcissists target other females as well - for example my mother abused me so horrifically throughout my life that I had to get a lawyer, cut off every single person who I’d ever met in my life to start again alone, and go to the police about it. She did abuse my father but committed no crimes against him, and he was able to simply divorce her, move away and get remarried. But the things she did to me were literally criminal, and my dad allowed her to get away with it, with extreme abuse, and left me with her while he took off and got himself another life. The same is true with male narcissists who target males (including fathers who target sons, co-workers, gay men, etc. ) My point here doesn’t take away from anyone’s suffering, I’m just expanding on your point.

    • @hardhatjack2207
      @hardhatjack2207 11 месяцев назад

      Yes! Tired of hearing that women have a monopoly on suffering

  • @trevorlangsett2735
    @trevorlangsett2735 6 лет назад +31

    To the guy who wrote that e-mail: Been there before. Once when I was 18, I thought the same as you did. Took years to get over this girl who basically did everything in the cluster b personality playbook to control me. Happened again once more when I was 26, but What I Realized the second time around was it wasn't necessarily their beauty I was addicted to, as I have seen and been with more physically attractive women but it was THE WAY THEY WERE BEHAVING that drove me. They were triggering my fear of failure, fear of loss, and abandonment in a game of "who has the power?" She knew what she was doing and didn't care enough to see that she was hurting me with manipulation. What the second girl didn't realize (she was 20) is that I had more experience with girls like her at this point and understood the cluster B pattern. This time before I got too deep, I could mitigate the damage before it got worse. I realized my first experience taught me a lot and finally saw a pattern in what I'm very attracted to: Being treated like I'm less. I look back to when I was 18 and see now how I played just as big of a role in the dynamic, by allowing her to control my emotions for the sake of keeping her same fears in check. It's all about control, domination and winning with overly insecure narcissistic types. The way you turn the table on these types of people is showing you have self value by moving on as swiftly as they would have from you. They'll catfish you, post passive aggressive statuses, and you just have to ignore it and realize they're just trying to calm their fears by getting you back in control.

    • @MultiFreddy34
      @MultiFreddy34 6 лет назад +7

      Trevor Langsett My man!! Such a well put together post. I whole heartedly agree with basically everything you said. And I've been there as well unfortunately.

    • @trevorlangsett2735
      @trevorlangsett2735 6 лет назад +7

      @Quinn Paton Very common feeling. The irony is (and even as morally superior as I try to make myself sound by pointing my finger at her saying 'oh she's a narcissist'), it's often that the narcissistic chooses someone who is actually just like them. I know that sounds odd, but narcissism is born from insecurity and very low self esteem, and they don't get into relationships with people who are secure. They choose people who are just as insecure as they are, and desire external validation just as much as they do. People who are insecure tend to miss the stable park bench to sit on with their significant other because 'it's too boring', and they'd rather sit on a seesaw where you and your partner are depending on each other's struggle for control to provide a really fun, addicting ride regardless of the abuse you endure or the other has to endures.
      So, depending on the matchup, the weaker one in one toxic relationship, has the same sort of makeup and potential to be the strong one in another toxic relationship with someone else who is also just as insecure.
      Look up 'the dance of the narcissist and co-dependent'.. it's an interesting insight into the dynamic.. and how they are both really narcissistic... co-dependency in a way is just inverted narcissism... the co-dependent is attaching themselves to the narcissist because they want something from them like validation (through abuse)... and the narcissist wants the co-dependents validation that they're 'perfect' and 'amazing' by controlling them (through abuse.)

    • @arib3871
      @arib3871 4 года назад

      Trevor Langsett WoW this was a great description

    • @sunnyadams5842
      @sunnyadams5842 Год назад

      ​@@trevorlangsett2735That is granular in a few new ways I hadn't yet thought of!! Enjoyed both comments you made here. Amazingly clear thinking, my friend.
      Thanks

  • @xantonify
    @xantonify 4 года назад +15

    Narcissistic traits:
    They see themselves as best at everything. Cooking,work,family,sports etc.
    Never apologize and claiming to never be wrong.
    You always gets the blame when things go sideways.
    They brag about themselves
    You must walk on eggshells and carefully select words when talking, to avoid conflict.
    They tell stories to their collegues,friends and family and tries to win everybodies attention and admiration.
    They are materialistic and waste alot of money
    Threwing tantrums and acting like a child
    Projecting their weaknesses to you. Calling you immature,selfish etc.
    Loves drama and tries to get involved with other peoples problems to feed their ego.
    Wanting to control everything, if you suggest a place to go travel,eat,enjoy. Narcissists will change your plans to their liking and avoiding ur wants and needs.
    You're getting very little seduction,love,sex after the beginning phase and it's always when they feel you have followed through their plan.
    Gets mad and jelous overy nonsense things, could be a much older woman/man who's your collegue and they hate to see you close to them talking alone etc.
    Cuts ties with your social life, making you contact your family and friends less. They want your focus on them only.
    Tell you can't manage things on your own and tries to prevent you from success. Work,school, changing tires,repair the bicycle whatever.
    They seem to disagree too much and almost on everything you love.
    They hate themselves and may also tell you that but can talk bad about you for loving yourself.
    Telling you how can you manage life on your own when they're gone?
    Talking about how celebrities and famous people look like them.
    Few compliments and they also like to talk how attractive other people are infront of you to make you mad and that they would marry a certain actor,singer,celebrity if he just asked them.
    Telling you how they want a man/woman to be,act,dress who is "enough" for them and in a sneaky way add in things to say they hate when they know you have that
    trait or clothing style.
    Hope any of this comes to help to you guys, i may add in a few later i may know of. As of now i actually had witnessed these traits in partner sadly.

    • @VincentHexx
      @VincentHexx 4 года назад +2

      I'm going through ALL of these at once right now...
      She's good at this and we've been together for 15 years. It just came to light last year and I had no idea at all.. but the signs were all right there and IN MY FACE.. but she is that good at it that I was just blind to it.

  • @charlycheer
    @charlycheer 7 лет назад +62

    Off topic but love the setting of this video. It makes such a dark topic brighter :)

    • @FromSurvivingToThriving
      @FromSurvivingToThriving  7 лет назад +2

      Thanks - its my front yard =)

    • @kunkunaku
      @kunkunaku 6 лет назад

      How dare you get off topic! LOL

    • @SoundOfFreedom67
      @SoundOfFreedom67 6 лет назад

      I was just thinking how nice it looks, and I like her hair like that, too. : )

    • @arcticablue
      @arcticablue 6 лет назад

      Yes, the flowers are so pretty!

    • @philknight7954
      @philknight7954 6 лет назад +1

      From Surviving To Thriving!! You could use a village devastated by a tsunami as the background...and still brighten the scene. Why can't I meet a woman like you

  • @audrabrizendine4799
    @audrabrizendine4799 4 года назад +19

    The narc I was with never ever wanted to talk like adults.. I could come to him with tears asking what can we do to fix our relationship but he never wanted to talk he’d actually say I’m not gonna fight with you!! I’d be shocked!! I would be talking in a normal respectful tone but he’d act as if I was yelling screaming cursing!! I never felt resolution and once I stepped back I realized I never really felt close to him.. I thought at times I did I really loved him but as look at our relationship in hindsight I always felt like I was working so so hard to prove the love I felt. I always thought my love would be relayed and felt by this person and it apparently never was.. it’s like an incomplete feeling that real love doesn’t feel like.. I too became accustomed to his behaviors so I wouldn’t say anything about the things that hurt me I knew it would b pointless and create another problem. I started to kind of like the silent treatment because at least then he wasn’t picking on me.. we could have a great day and then the next day I’d get ignored as if I had done something wrong.. it made me feel crazy and very unimportant.. I decided to leave the toxic situation only to be hovered months later and stupid me accepted his attempt.. I now regret it and I knew better I’ve watched these videos and have heard never ever go back.. he played me again I guess so he could be the one to let me go.. literally I spent the night he said he’d call me later that afternoon he called me but hung up when I answered and I haven’t heard from him since.. so now I have to start over to get to the point I had gotten to after I left I was not thinking about him I was starting to feel confident again. I’ll be ok and I guess I just had to give it 1 more go to really accept that he will never love me. Thank you for these videos they are the best information and advice !

    • @markvickroy6725
      @markvickroy6725 3 года назад +1

      OMG.
      This.
      No one ever really made this point.
      I was always "yelling"
      I really yelled 3 times, in 3 years. Twice at the end smh.
      So... I could only whisper my concerns.
      Of course the first....year if I had any issues I got "I'm gonna leave, I'm gonna scream" etc.
      Ugh.

  • @Poppi_Weasel
    @Poppi_Weasel 7 лет назад +25

    Real sad. Going thru abuse for the sake of looks. Real shame. Everytime I heard the words "My Girlfriend..." I just SMH.

  • @starlingswallow
    @starlingswallow 5 лет назад +22

    This sounds exactly like my ex 💔😥 Please, please break it off, cold turkey, no-contact & block her on social media and in your phone so you aren't reeled back in by her "I miss my boyfriend" crap. You mentioned "she's hot". Let me tell you, looks shouldn't be the sole reason you stay in an abusive/toxic relationship. The reasons you should stay is if you're respected, loved, ACCEPTED FOR WHO YOU ARE, someone who can calmly communicate their needs to you and hear you out calmly in return. She has double standards. Expect 100% but gives you ZERO (like Michelle mentioned!!).
    *You only get ONE LIFE TO LIVE....don't waste it on someone like this!*

  • @Hades69099
    @Hades69099 6 лет назад +56

    I dated a narcissist for 6 months, although it was mostly text based. It was like walking on eggshells. I say one point against her and she says 3 against me, and I'm supposed to be the one to apologize. I wasn't even confronting her out of malice, I was just trying to explain things that were bothering me about the relationship, but she couldn't take it. Sometimes I'll go out on dates when they come my way, but I'm just overall happier being alone. I pretty much only have crazy women in my reach. All the good girls are taken, probably by a guy who's dating other women behind her back, and I get left with the crumbs, so no thanks. Dating is an all or nothing game and I'm just tired of playing it. I'm done pandering to adult infants. Great decision for my life, great for my self esteem and self respect.

    • @tomd1434
      @tomd1434 5 лет назад +4

      Zach you look like a young guy. Hang in there man. Look there are some great woman out there and not all are taken. That's just some frustration talking and I get it. I met a great girl and I'm 39. Been together for almost 2 years. She's not perfect, nor am I but so far we're a good match. I get the allure of crazy fast women and I know how much mental damage they can cause. Sometimes a good woman may not be the most exciting but so what? Who needs constant excitement? That's impossible to maintain anyway. Maybe take a break but don't get discouraged.

    • @izroda84
      @izroda84 4 года назад

      RED PILL MGTOW MENTALITY IS THE ESSENCE OF THE MAN ON PURPOSE MINDSET

  • @bjc215
    @bjc215 6 лет назад +70

    The only girl I ever loved is an overt narcissist.. She is a pro at everything from love bombing and gaslighting to devaluing to discarding and playing the power game to moving on to another relationship within a month.. Now that she's gone and I have nothing but time ..I'm thinking about my childhood dysfunction, my parents qualities, and engaging in a crazy amount of introspection. After learning more about narcissists, I'm starting to believe that I display some covert narcissistic traits myself. I'm certainly NOT good at being a narcissist! ..the empathy really gets in the way of selfishness! But I have that covert grandiosity in my head even though I have low confidence.. and am introverted and have other maladaptive behavior patterns to look at and hopefully change! But I know that I have love and empathy because I still love my narc ex; knowing she really can't love me the same way.. I empathise with her..her narc mom and childhood neglect and I do not blame her for being a narcissist. She didn't choose to be a narcissist..Her self esteem is worse than mine even though she is extremely beautiful and intelligent and even doing great at the whole narcissistic thing! ..but it is just sad..even though she has a ton of pleasure, she cannot ever have any internal happiness.. and knowing that she doesn't have the ability to look at herself means she probably won't ever change.. so..I don't mind so much about being heartbroken ..that she feels power or whatever for hurting my feelings more than I thought possible ..the experience seems to be helping me become a better person than I was before. I wish that I could have helped her.
    ..just my sorta different experience and attitude on this very fascinating topic

    • @bjc215
      @bjc215 6 лет назад +1

      How is it going Quinn Paton? ..how did the shrink go? ..they gave me a very mild antidepressant (Wellbutrin) and I'm seeing a therapist..

    • @tanyastevens9553
      @tanyastevens9553 6 лет назад +3

      Wow!
      I understand this quite well...
      Thanks for sharing.
      This brings clarity.

    • @monktilready9812
      @monktilready9812 5 лет назад +1

      bjc215 wow, sounds exactly like my past relationship.....scarily similar

    • @anonymouslee2083
      @anonymouslee2083 5 лет назад +11

      You don't sound like a narcissist. Even wishing you could have helped her is something someone with NPD would never think

    • @eatplaylaugh3019
      @eatplaylaugh3019 5 лет назад

      If you were truly a narcissist even a covert narcissist you would know almost instantly someone else is a narcissist because narcissists are always trying to read people and situations to look for how they can exploit the situation in their favour as much as possible. And like they say it takes one to know one. Even after a lot of reading on narcissisim most people still struggle to identify the narcs as fast as real narcs. Usually we have to talk to them a bit or know more about their background. It sounds like your narc was more on the extreme end because she was so good at manipulation so it's unlikely you wouldve missed those signs if you were a real narc.

  • @nightfox7355
    @nightfox7355 6 лет назад +37

    tell him don't do it... I've been married to a Narcissistic for 20yrs ..and I'm just learning... thank you!

  • @endthefed1448
    @endthefed1448 6 лет назад +15

    This is her, this is her (my ex!!!). All points that you mention describe her to the TEE !!!!! She broke off calling me a psychopath and I went into depression because of her for 3 months. Thank you for this video Michelle. Thank you, thank you, thank you !!

  • @carrieparkermusic
    @carrieparkermusic 5 лет назад +11

    They want 100% and want to give 2%
    Bye Felicia.... hot doesn’t mean $$$$

  • @understandyourmind
    @understandyourmind 6 лет назад +11

    I do also videos about narcissistic experience. Yes it is about ignoring red flags because they are so attractive and also we are not experienced on subject whatsoever. Not a person will step into same river after this experience, after they know about narcissism, red flags, gut feelings and so on ... We stepped into that river because we never even had an idea that something like this exist. It is very eyes opening and toxic and deep experience that will change us but that's ok. We can help other people become more aware

    • @brianwalsh1401
      @brianwalsh1401 4 года назад

      Unfortunately a lot of people will "step into the river" as you put it because they don't really get what happened to them. In fact most people keep doing it thinking the next time will be different and it will be different if people do the work on themselves. Healthy people with good self-esteem might pick up on what happened to them and learn from it. People who come from dysfunctional families and have no self esteem or boundaries are likely to get into another one of these relationships because being treated like this is unfortunately familiar.

  • @drummerjeroensimons
    @drummerjeroensimons 5 лет назад +11

    And let,s be honest here: A beautiful woman is beautiful inside and outside, because those things are connected : soul/spirit/body... Michelle , you are one them!! And I mean it with respect.

  • @erwinvanderlaan5884
    @erwinvanderlaan5884 3 года назад +8

    This is SO exactly similar to my own recent experience with a narcissistic girl. I got goosebumps all the time listening to this story. From the first moment concerning 'trust your gut feeling' to every single example and red flag. It's so scary - and exactly the physical attraction (and the sexuality coming out of her mouth) is the point I'm still struggling with to let go. it's been 6 months since she discarded me, and now, slowly, I'm getting myself back to who I really am, after giving her all that I had. It's a nightmare. I hope the boy makes the right decision for himself, and that would be to leave her. The heart may tell something else, but the gut and the head know. As horrible as it is.

    • @saintmarybulicek567
      @saintmarybulicek567 3 года назад +1

      This is me fulfilling my promise, he’s my favorite after so many heartbreaks. I thought it was time to give myself a break and focus on my job while trying to heal from my previous toxic relationship. After about a year and half I met a man who turned out to be my daughter’s boss , I was reluctant at first but his persistence and high spiritedness got me submissive. We started getting along so well , no day passes without constant communication, I fell in love and didn’t want to be hurt ever again; told him my weaknesses and he told me his, along the line he came across his ex and his attitude towards me started getting cold. Seemed like deja vu all over and so I couldn’t let the anxiety tear me apart. I met a colleague who introduced me to the best set of Private investigators ultimate hack , I contacted and hired them almost immediately and they requested a down payment to commence the job after targets cell number was provided. After few hrs they responded with all the deleted and recent messages , Whats App Facebook Instagram Snapchat gps and archives of pictures he has been sending out; I practically had access to his phone without his knowledge. Turns out he connived with his young sibling to test my patience and tolerance, all the info was carted to me , thanks to the hackers I now pass his test with ease, lol . For assistance on how to track or monitor your spouse email ultimatehack003@ gmail com or Whats App/call/text +17202954268 I wish you well as You find out the truth about your partner just like I did
      ..

  • @jamesandrew62
    @jamesandrew62 7 лет назад +16

    Sounds like an emotionally sadistic partner that needs consequences rather than more understanding. The repeated message that you don't understand will fill you with self doubt & keep you in the loop of disrespectful put downs & invalidation, making you hungry for crumbs of approval/acceptance, The solution is to work on self acceptance & stop falling into the empty trap of seductive desire. Unfortunately this weakness for beuty is the norm, although it does reduce with age & a shift in values to higher moral vertue, Seek honesty over hotness.

  • @thundavolt
    @thundavolt 6 лет назад +21

    The BPD is strong in this situation.

  • @KevinEarley
    @KevinEarley 5 лет назад +5

    Dude! I married your girlfriend. LOL I feel for you. After 23 years of being abused and three young children later, she is actually even more abusive. This won't ever get better and will likely get worse.

  • @carefulcarpenter
    @carefulcarpenter 6 лет назад +12

    There are many unhealthy people in society. I have spent many years on my spiritual journey. 17 years if I was to give a length of time.
    In general, these narcissistic traits are found in many groups.
    *"LOVE is listening"*
    🐡

  • @craighill5827
    @craighill5827 6 лет назад +8

    Run for your life. Control, manipulate, dominate and emasculate. That's the pattern. You may be slightly codependant. She certainly is. A mixture of NPD and BPD.

  • @dandreadyson2267
    @dandreadyson2267 4 года назад +7

    My advise to the man in this post.
    This is a hamster wheel situation. These types of Devils don't want peace. They keep moving the goal post when you have corrected a supposed flaw they pionted out in your life. These types of Devils thrive on conflict to keep you confused so they can control and manipulate you. She might be some beautiful eye candy on your arm however its not worth having your soul and sanity stripped away. I was in your situation during my mid 20's and my dearly departed mother of ninety one years old gave me some simple down home saged advice that snaped me out of my spell. She said "Son" you can't stay in the bed forever. You got to eventually come out of the bed and deal with reality. The bed analogy was the amazing sex with the DRAMA NARC girlfriend. The reality outside of the bed was the Hamster Wheel. Going around in circles dealing with DRAMA!

  • @VINTAGEO
    @VINTAGEO 6 лет назад +36

    I don't think we men are pushovers so much as we are blindsided and confused as to what the hell is going on in this relationship! I am currently in one and have been for 2 years, but I am realizing what's going on. I lost my business last year because my partner no longer wanted to work with me, I had no idea why, but now I am seeing that my relationship probably had a lot to do with it, it CHANGED me.
    I have tried to leave her several times, even had cops involved, but she would show up in the middle of the night in the pouring rain crying, what's a guy with a heart to do?! Then it starts all over again, but this time even more cunning than the last.
    I have been isolated from friends, family, etc.
    I always feel on the defensive, walking on eggshells in MY house! Not anymore! I have cut all ties and I have some family and friends left to help.
    It's extremely hard when you actually LOVE someone and nothing you ever do seems to work! Total craziness!!
    I was ashamed to admit that I was being abused by a woman, that's not supposed to happen to a man!
    BULLSHIT!!! It can happen to anyone!!
    I wrote this about a month ago on another video pertaining to the same issue, but I think it needs to be heard everywhere!
    Michelle you are great and have amazing insight and information on this topic!
    Thanks for what you do..

    • @dwalter2259
      @dwalter2259 5 лет назад +8

      It will change you. I lost myself in my relationship. I was always confident but when I got with her I was always second guessing myself and feeling down.

    • @CrossFitTRG
      @CrossFitTRG 5 лет назад +1

      Good to hear you are out

    • @erlycuyler
      @erlycuyler 5 лет назад +5

      I can relate my brother! I have zero friends anymore. Went for over a year not talking to any family members. Instead of walking on eggshells,I compare it walking blindfolded in a field of rakes. We are married but she left me two days ago. Good luck to you my friend.

    • @nopcshere6097
      @nopcshere6097 4 года назад +3

      I feel you dude. I was you once. My former wife and her NMom and NDad were verbally, financially and emotionally abusive to me for most of our 9 years of marriage. My former wife put her NMom and NDad first - there was NO TIME for our marriage because her parents mattered first, and I was EXPECTED to serve THEM. Now I am free of them and involved with the love of my life who is SO GOOD to me and treats me like a human being! Good women DO EXIST.

  • @drkeertim9650
    @drkeertim9650 5 лет назад +7

    Dear Empaths ,
    The only way to survive a narcissist is run away and save yourself .
    Healing from sun god to you .

  • @DailyAiGuy
    @DailyAiGuy 4 года назад +9

    I was feeling down today about my ex. But when you have a gorgeous relationship coach open your eyes about your ex mistreating you. No matter how attached I am, I can go about my day today. Thank you !

  • @kennethtavares707
    @kennethtavares707 5 лет назад +10

    This is an incredible video. 22 years of marriage and I have never realized that I was in a narcissistic relationship with my wife. Two years ago my kids told me she was narcissistic person and that is when I started looking into this. Most of the red flags you brought out was in my marriage.
    We have a Downe syndrome 21 year old boy and lives with me cause she wants her own life.
    Thanks for the video. My name is Ken.

  • @srmillard
    @srmillard 5 лет назад +11

    The letter from the subscriber sounds like they're with a woman with BPD not NPD, but there's tons of overlap between the 2 (b/c they're both Cluster B)

  • @davekyle6096
    @davekyle6096 6 лет назад +7

    "My girlfriend is focussing on tiny details..." Yes, I believe a Narcissist looks for any possible negative to support her Devaluation Phase. My lovely ex-Narcissist justified her multiple affairs by telling me I "left water droplets around the sink, which disrespected her cleaning efforts." She also didn't like my "leaving chocolate bar wrappers (maximum one about once a month) on the tv table".

  • @Inkwaziflyfishing
    @Inkwaziflyfishing 6 лет назад +8

    I think that is really valuable to hear about female narcissistic behavior. All too often the perception is that this is predominantly a male trait. But men find themselves in relationships with narcissistic women all the time and don't recognize it or don't find the help and advice they need. Unfortunately I know this first hand, and more than once have made the same mistake. It is imperative that men understand that there are narcissistic women out there and they are not responsible for "fixing them".

  • @BokushingusKendoTV
    @BokushingusKendoTV 6 лет назад +49

    Ohh man I totally understand what he’s going through. Once my exgf silent treatment lost power over me, she would become extremely critical of almost everything I did or say. Within six month, I was dumped. For weeks I tried to figure what I did wrong and I kept asking myself was it me was I selfish for not giving into her demands. Her last sentence to me was, “you are a good guy you need to find someone that will love you for you. I’m sorry but I don’t love you anymore and I don’t want to be with you anymore and I’m in love with someone else.” That made me question everything about myself. But I know now, it wasn’t me.

    • @mentalhibees
      @mentalhibees 6 лет назад +9

      definitely wasn't you, they cannot love anyone

    • @garymullins7431
      @garymullins7431 6 лет назад +6

      Walk away and don't look back.They live in a world that we will never know.

    • @alphyzqrw7222
      @alphyzqrw7222 6 лет назад +5

      Be strong man I was in the same situation

    • @Steffi5376
      @Steffi5376 6 лет назад +4

      @bokush Wow this helped so much. He was narc too but during one of our lasts convos, he ended things then came back (typical hoovering huh) and got on the phone and said similar things like I deserve to be happy. He never gave a real reason though and told me I can think whatever I want so that made me question if it's me too and trust me that feeling is so hard to overcome. But now I know that that's just the way they play I guess. I'm glad someone else went through something similar to what I did, let's not believe their lies no more, and hearing others' stories does help with my healing as well so thank you too. So sorry to everyone who has encountered narcissists, you certainly don't deserve it and we'll get out of this alive 💪
      @intx Sadly what you said is true, from my experience, he would only be genuinely interested in my if he got jealous as well. But it's really not worth it tbh I would rather have nothing to do with them than to be love bombed. Let's not manipulate the manipulators and become manipulators ourselves, we are and deserve so much better than that!

    • @z00011001
      @z00011001 5 лет назад +2

      I think she was nice. She definitely was not narcisstic one. Yours is case of bad chemistry. Narcisstic ones are like living with a rapist except that you cannot prove any rape.!

  • @nobodysomebody2719
    @nobodysomebody2719 6 лет назад +5

    Yea, I hear you bro! I wasted 7 years with a woman exactly like yours. I couldn't look where I wanted, say what I wanted, watch t.v as I wanted, touch her or try to get romantic without her making it into something perverted. Never took responsibility for all the drama she started. Argued almost everyday. Never had any passion not even one real kiss ever. No intimacy no concern for my emotional or physical needs. Rather then be intimate she'd say take a sleeping pill and leave me alone! Bro, the meaning of the name Devil is: the deceiver. You'll never fix her. She deceived you from the beginning . now you're hooked. The deceiver Wil continue to deceive you if you stay with her. Even the devil will wear a priest robe and swear on the bible to deceive you! Narcissict are relationship ruiners. They spread their evil and deceit from one person to the next. With no care or empathy. They are joyful to see you in misery. It's their emotional supply of content. Knowing your miserable. Then they dump you to ruin yet another person. In a nut shell no the devil isn't mentally ill only emotionally ill. Just like the Devil the narcissist is the same. As a rose is a rose by any other name! Narcissist is a made up contemporary label for the word deceiver. The Devil!

    • @sunnyadams5842
      @sunnyadams5842 Год назад +1

      I COUKD NIT SAT HALLELUJAH any louder. So right on. I did not know that evil, true evil walked this earth uncaged. I was secueved for😢 over a decade.
      But when the scales finally fell from my eyes?? There's just no unseeing some things!! I just couldn't believe the depth of the deception !

  • @maryelizabethrogers4481
    @maryelizabethrogers4481 7 лет назад +58

    The fact that he is writing Michelle means he already knows his girlfriend is not normal. He knows there is something wrong. And there is something very wrong, and it won't get better! If he marries her, this toxic game will be his life.

  • @anthonywaldrep5982
    @anthonywaldrep5982 7 лет назад +47

    Do not marry or pursue this woman any more bro! Believe me, it WILL get worse after you get married!! Always look for beauty on the inside and not so much on the outside. Love is what love does! True love is not abusive in any way!

  • @brnt034
    @brnt034 6 лет назад +9

    The biggest mistakes and errors in judgment I have ever made in my life is when I ignored my instincts/gut that was screaming at me to step back from the ledge and not to go through with whatever choice that was before me!

  • @ferraripure9970
    @ferraripure9970 4 года назад +2

    He's dating an evil demon that's not a girlfriend !

  • @lyndiacurtis2065
    @lyndiacurtis2065 7 лет назад +16

    Seen this many times with looks being such a priority red flags are ignored, great video!

  • @sexybaby21lovely
    @sexybaby21lovely 7 лет назад +17

    do you just get more beautiful with every video ? ♥_♥ love all the topics so thankful you're taking the time to make them♥♥

  • @kataldo9715
    @kataldo9715 4 года назад +4

    Huge credit to this young male subscriber for his strength, courage & wisdom to write in and actually address these issues, this SHOWS that he is truly thinking (& with the big head & NOT just the little one too ... which gets a ton of men into MASSIVE TROUBLE too!!) ... so again, HUGE CREDIT TO THIS YOUNG MALE SUBSCRIBER FOR BEING MATURE ENOUGH TO ACTUALLY WRITE IN & ADDRESS THIS!! He should be extremely proud of himself!!
    Now, onto my second point = HE SOULD RUN SCREAMING FOR THE HILLS AS FAR AWAY FROM THIS TOXIC, EVIL POSSESSED DEAMON AS POSSIBLE & SAVE HIS LIFE, HIS MENTAL HEALTH & HIS FUTURE FAMILY TOO!! This is beyond a recipe for 100% PURE DISASTER & one that *WILL* result in any future children getting DIRECTLY HARMED IN SEVERAL WAYS TOO ... just look at and ask any other Dad who is going through / has already been down this same/similar "hot girl nightmare" & THE HIGH PRICE THAT THEIR KIDS PAID for what was essentially a hot piece of @$$ ... who the hot piece of @$$ WILL FADE on too!!
    Back in the day, I was ... and many still consider me to be a fellow "hot girl" & I have been around TONS of these toxic types myself & I for one CAN'T STAND THEM &/or the nightmare torture I see them put truly good men through as well. My REAL, Real Man is a very ordinary looking, very simple man & I BEYOND COMPLETELY ADORE HIM & RESPECT HIM!! He takes excellent care of MY HEART & to me, this is what matter the most ~ to me!! Yes, I've been told countless time that I'm "not normal" when it comes to these types of thing, AND THANK GOD ... Who I do thank, each and every day!!
    What many men & people are ACTUALLY TRULY UP AGAINST THESES DAYS is known as The Jezebel Spirit & much of this all coincides DIRECTLY with End Times prophecy. I would strongly encourage you to take a much LARGER STEP BACK & LOOK at other things going on all over the globe, research End Times prophecy events happening ALL OVER THE WORLD & you will start to see that what is REALLY GOING ON ~ much larger scale ~ globally ~ TRULY IS End Times Spiritual Warfare.
    I would encourage you to get truly right with God, our most high God, and once you do, trust me, He WILL SEND YOU THE RIGHT PERSON & an excellent wife and future mother who WILL TRULY BLESS YOUR LIFE & in many, many ways ... including "BEING A HOT GIRL" TOO!! ~ Which, is what my REAL, Real Christian Man says all the time to me ... which is just one of the countless super sweet & yes, super hot qualities that my Heavenly Father blessed my life with too!! And trust me, we are the "oddest, odd couple" from worldly standards out there too; you should see the looks we get when we go out in public ~ we just laugh together BECAUSE WE BOTH KNOW WE WERE DIVINELY BROUGHT TO EACH OTHER!! The outside world thinks he is either "super rich, or super hung" as the saying goes ... little do they know, it was actually HIS AUTHENTIC HEART THAT'S WHAT FIRST TRULY CAUGHT MY EYE ... and then, CAPTURED MY HEART ... and as they say, the rest is history ... and a history BUILT ON THE STRONGEST FOUNDATION THERE IS ... Our JOINT love, respect & honoring of building our relationship based upon the firm foundation of Our Heavenly Father, above *ALL ELSE* ~ most especially, above any & all worldly standards types of things, like she is *ONLY* a "hot girl," (other then that, she is a PURE NIGHTMARE / DEAMON / WOLF IN SHEEPS CLOTHING as the Biblical WARNING TEACHES US!!)
    Wishing this young viewer all the best & strongly encourage him to PRAY ... & pray some more ... and trust that God *WILL* send him exactly what he prays for too!! My man prayed for a woman who "is super clingy cuddly wise" & BOY DID HE EVER GET HIS PRAYERS SERIOUSLY ANSWERED ON THIS FRONT TOO, because I cuddle up to him "like cling wrap" he says ;-) just one of the many, many things we have both realized over time are the EXACT QUALITIES WE BOTH PRAYED ABOUT WANTING & NEEDING IN A LIFETIME PARTNER ... and we both got what we prayed for and was/is the MOST IMPORTANT QUALITIES too!!
    So pray to God & go to work on building your own life getting it ready for when God see to it that she WILL walk directly into your life & change your world forever ~ for the better ~ TRULY BETTER TOO ... & then, from that point on, the two of you can build your lives and future family together from there.
    The first step is DUMP THIS CURRENT NIGHTMARE YOU REFER TO AS A "girlfriend," she is NO "girlfriend," she is a SOUL ASSASSIN looking to suck your life and your soul out of you ~ ONLY YOU CAN STOP THE ABUSE & LEARN FROM IT ~ & PROTECT YOUR HEART FOR THE TRULY WORTHY WOMAN WHO IS ALREADY LOOKING FOR YOU ~ SEEKING YOU ~ WANTING YOU ~ because she can't and won't be ABLE to come to you UNTIL you DUMP of this current 100% COMPLETE NIGHTMARE!! It all starts by cleaning up your current 'situation' ... and then, going to work on yourself & your self-care ... making room for the REAL HOT ~ ON ALL LEVELS, STARTING WITH HER HEART ~ WOMAN THAT GOD ALREADY HAS WAITING IN THE WINGS FOR YOU!! You deserve to be happy & so do your future kids & family too!! That is a RESPONSIBILITY THAT AS A REAL, REAL YOUNG MAN YOURSELF ~ YOU MUST LEARN TO *TRULY LEAD* ON TOO!! Please find some excellent, truly God honoring REAL MEN, men who know the differences between TRUE LEADERSHIP vs. 'dictatorship' & LEARN FROM THEM ... who knows, one of them may have a daughter who might be perfect for you too ... who better to help you "land the girl" then her own, strong Christian father too?? I was just prompted to share this thought with you ... may your life be TRULY & AUTHENTICALLY BLESSED!!
    ~ 💞🙏🏻🙇🏻‍♀️🙏🏻💓...

  • @CrazyBear65
    @CrazyBear65 6 лет назад +2

    I told a waitress in a diner one time she had pretty eyes. She did. She sat down next to me and started talking. She kept sitting back down next to me whenever she wasn't doing anything. This went on for a couple weeks, then she asked me for a ride home one night... Remember that song: "One thing, yeah one thing leads to another..." By the time you realize you're in too deep, you're in too deep. Shit happens.

  • @Nicole-ck1nk
    @Nicole-ck1nk 5 лет назад +6

    Wow your girl friend is a copy of my husband, I lost my beautiful 24 years old daughter to brain tumor in April 2017 and my husband did not give me a hug and he wanted that I comforted him???? And when Confronted him he told me she was my child too why should I hug you 🤯🤯over 30 years he has done that to me , the bad news is that after marriage and spatially after years of living whit her she will be 500 percent worse, run run run and don’t look back , my husband has give me the silent treatment and now I am so angry , I am 49 years old and now I want divorce, yes dear you’re right my husband make me upset even when my child was going true brain tumor and I was crying every day after he made me upset he sat on the the sofa and looked at me like I was the crazy one and if I did not react on his craziness he did not stop until flipped , every Christmas and holidays he had to give me silent treatment for 2 or 3 weeks and after he told me how much he loved me and if I don’t answer him back we will have no problem , these monsters are NOT marriage quality and they should be single for ever , they make bad fathers and mothers,🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

    • @sreyanshuchaterjee3962
      @sreyanshuchaterjee3962 4 года назад +1

      Sorry to hear about your loss. A hug and a prayer from a random stranger online. Heal and live better. Peace.

  • @JimKJeffries
    @JimKJeffries 5 лет назад +3

    I was you, I married her & gave her my best for 17+ years. I am awesome & she was hot. If you understand that emotional abuse is effective only when there is a kernel of truth, then free yourself by giving your best, always, in all ways, & know your human & love yourself. If you do the last part, she will leave you. Mentally ill abusive people can not stand being loved or around healthy people or situations. Learn to love yourself & how you were addicted to testosterone & then she got you hooked on dopamine & validation. You are worthy of love. Give the task, the day, your best & you will know how awesome you are in a manner that can not be took or given. Know you are loved.

  • @ohhiguy
    @ohhiguy 4 года назад +6

    "I would rather hurt you with the truth, than tell you everything is OK." Great line.

  • @bestaff
    @bestaff 6 лет назад +18

    They have do have empathy for animals.....almost overwhelming empathy....but zero for you!

    • @siteadmin6172
      @siteadmin6172 6 лет назад +5

      Wow....didn’t see that coming, but agree one hundred percent. Super cuddly loving with the cat...none for me.

    • @TheRealest127
      @TheRealest127 6 лет назад +2

      bestaff ACCURATE. 👌🏾

    • @cjroberts7022
      @cjroberts7022 5 лет назад +1

      right

    • @asiavanz5121
      @asiavanz5121 5 лет назад +2

      Oh my lord, yes and yes again and again. It feels so pitifully awful to be made to feel jealous and/or angry because of the totally extreme difference in the way they will treat pets. Yet all the while knowing very well that what you are going through is not right at all and actually truly hurtful, insulting, disrespectful, and down right crazy! Watching this multiple times daily has at times sucked the will to do anything right out of me and caused me severe depression (which I am shamed for during and after the fact!)

    • @robynmattfield2919
      @robynmattfield2919 3 года назад

      Not all narcissist like or love animals but their are some that can get along well with pets and some beat their pets to death and literally beating the pet until its dead. It just depends on what kind of narcissist you are dealing with and how they can not be nice to animals and the animals can sense that they are bad people and they smell danger. As well as the children who they will also beat them and cause some injuries. So not all narcissist like animals and most of them are far from being a animal lover because they are not even close to being nice to the pets. Watch out what you are listening to and find out if it is someone who knows about narcissist abuse and manipulation tactics and if you listen to them you can find out who is a narcissist in the relationship and they will show you so keep your eyes open and ears listening to everything they are talking about and then they will give it away most of the time but if you don't know this, then you will never be listening to them that closely because you normally don't need to be on guard 24/7 pets are not safe being around a narcissist because they will kill them and don't even blink when they are done killing the family pet and they go on like nothing happened. Just like they all do after their silence treatment is over and they come back like everything is fine and they are not even close to being fine but the narcissist will not be a part of the answer and they will not answer your questions on purpose or they have turned you out and don't hear anything you are saying and that is what really makes matters worse for them and us who are with the narcissist. They are not going to talk about it anymore and they say that was in the past. If you are lucky to get that out of them.i told myself that they don't know what they were fighting about because they turn anything into a fight and let the silent treatment begin.

  • @Halpin2006
    @Halpin2006 4 года назад +4

    At 18:30, "I'm so attracted to my girlfriend despite how she is". Oh yes! Jodi Arias was lovely, sexy, blonde, and looked so incredible! Then once she is tried for murdering her boyfriend, she goes full nerdy, weak, and burnette. Jodi is a perfect example of how a deranged woman can sell her rotten contents into a perfect package to her "potential buyer".

  • @FromSurvivingToThriving
    @FromSurvivingToThriving  6 лет назад

    Female Histrionic narcissists are so didficult to leave. Nothing shows this better than the memoir Dating. Harley Quinn Female Histeionic narcissist which is currently on sale for the unbelievable price of $1.99!!!! For limited time only.
    The memoir Dating Harley Quinn Femal Histrionic Narcissist is currently on sale for the unbelievable price of $1.99!!! No one, and I mean NO ONE understands the turmoil, the damage, the prison, the nightmare.... the HELL that a person undergoes while in a relationship with a narcissist -unless they have been there themselves. This TRUE story is so insane that it’s difficult to believe that it’s a non fiction book!! But it is... it is 100% true!
    She tried to kill me twice, I tried to kill myself once, an employee of mine tried to kill me and in the end - I tried to kill HER!!! I went from $2 Million dollars a year to homeless; in the span of 3 years I sank enough Meth to keep a herd of elephants awake indefinitely and yet as hard as I hit rock bottom, I didn't stay down and from the bottom of my heart I hope that inspires YOU.
    The beginning of the relationship was surreal - if ever I had fantasized about what the perfect girl would be - it paled in comparison to what Angel was truly like and how she enhanced my life. If I were to compare her to anyone I had ever dated - it would not be fair; it would be like comparing a painting done with finger paints hanging on a refrigerator door, held up with a magnet, to Michelangelo's art scenes from Genesis painted on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel in Rome.
    I quite literally could not imagen a girl more totally perfect, my imagination was stretched just to take in the reality of her. She brought me to the edge of the stratosphere where the air is so thin you have to wear a space suit - but the view - the view is all humanity stretched out before you and you can see the curvature of the earth.
    Beyond this point there is no measurement of height, from here on it becomes - distance. As you glide in perfect tranquility at the edge of space, the sun so bright your visor is almost black, gasping at the beauty of life that you never thought possible.
    And then ...... she dropped me.
    What looked,smelled, tasted and felt so enticing in the beginning, quickly turned into a covert poison that cost me my million dollar business, my health, provoked a suicide attempt and left me homeless and suffering brain damage.
    Why? Because Angel is a Histrionic Narcissist -they are bad people, it’s what they d
    Hit that buy now button -the down below -and you will have immediate access to Dating Harley Quinn, I promise you - once you start reading it, you won’t be able to put it down until it’s finished!! payhip.com/b/a31b

  • @anonymouslee2083
    @anonymouslee2083 5 лет назад +7

    To this poor guy, I have one word: RUN!

  • @joshuabailey346
    @joshuabailey346 3 года назад +3

    This is exactly what I went through. I’d talk in a nice tone but she’d always tell me I’m being mean when she’d talk to me in this mean sassy tone and I was like am I going insane but I’d literally apologize to her every time 🤦🏾‍♂️

  • @torrace12
    @torrace12 6 лет назад +5

    It is time to talk openly about that you will sit at 60 years or 50 years old, realizing your health is gone decades to early and your life and your opportunities are gone because you have let yourself be conned into having a narcissist rule your life.
    really get into how a level of bitterness like that feels like , because it will be your only guarantee to see clearly enough to leave abusive sick people early
    , your sitting in your chair on your favorite spot and looking back you realize that you have been cheated of your life, its now too late to start over, and you now see clearly that the dodging of conflicts, the compromising attempts the ways that seemed the best before because they where a little bit easyer, was not worth it by lightyears,
    and you realize that you have been consumed, like a working animal in the 1800s, by another human.
    you also realize now who you are and what you really want to do in life, two decades later then you would have otherwise, because someone else have always done so much to stop your devellopement,
    and now you dont have a chance to use your capacity to the full ever in your life.

  • @Dj-ve2hx
    @Dj-ve2hx 5 лет назад +5

    Sounds like my wife relationship of more than 25 years, ex wife.
    Remember when you agree to Richter or poorer, better or worse, sickness or health.
    I never breached my contract.

  • @machineshopinc.6783
    @machineshopinc.6783 4 года назад +3

    Run buddy! My wife left me as soon as I got out from under her thumb. Control freak. She's still trying to control me. Long story short we're now getting divorced.

  • @whotusay750
    @whotusay750 6 лет назад +5

    Red flag 1 starts @ 6:50

  • @toneman335
    @toneman335 5 лет назад +4

    I have learned that you must always maintain strong boundaries and never compromise them. That is the difference between someone who is strong and someone who is weak.

  • @tonytaglalucci7778
    @tonytaglalucci7778 6 лет назад +6

    Great video! I'm going through the same thing and my ex girlfriend has all 17 traits... I'm on my way out but she's making it very difficult and it's true the attraction is almost none now...

  • @TheSanityMachine33
    @TheSanityMachine33 5 лет назад +4

    You're pretty awesome. This video will help a lot of people!

  • @nyias6576
    @nyias6576 7 лет назад +11

    She also called herself the sun smh

  • @narcfreeatlast6975
    @narcfreeatlast6975 4 года назад +4

    Tough love is often better long term. My advice: Run dude! Don't marry her. She sounds like a narc!

  • @hpy2cre8
    @hpy2cre8 5 лет назад +5

    I love this content! Thank you for providing it. Please keep in mind that women can fall for female narcissists, and of course men can fall for male narcissists. Thanks! :)

  • @timetothrive1637
    @timetothrive1637 6 лет назад +6

    My psychopath ex used to always find silly little things to fall out with me at times she decided she needed no communication with me (for what ever reason). I posted a meme on fb (a test) about the Japanese believing we have 3 faces, Inc one face that no-one will ever see... she took this extremely personally, she never apologised, and always tried to compliment me and bring me up to manipulate me. When ever I tried to communicate about her little mini tantrums openly she said I was trying to control her, or she said I was trying to start and argument! This was a successful woman in her late 30s, and on good days chemistry was out of this world...... but the 3rd time was enough!

  • @bluenetmarketing
    @bluenetmarketing 4 года назад +2

    The worst part of a narcissist, is realizing that you didn't see them and their wrecking ball coming. Not only are you broken from the feelings of loss, you are also left drifting endlessly because you don't know how to prevent it from happening again. It's like not being able to see a trap hole in the ground when going about your normal day. Now it is impossible to know who to trust since we don't have the skills to see the disaster coming. It is doubly the most disconcerting things to encounter. What other people in our lives are also narcissists that we don't yet see? It turns the whole world into one big minefield. Everywhere you step, a bomb can go off. I'm not sure anyone can ever get over that. The only safe choice is to withdraw, completely.

  • @newjackcity1921
    @newjackcity1921 5 лет назад +4

    how do i tell my brother that he is with one she separating my family...

  • @dreamwishergirl
    @dreamwishergirl 5 лет назад +2

    I am a girl and I am mortified this guy is putting up with this girl 😨 I feel so bad for him. I hope he kicked her ass to the curb!

  • @lezg5071
    @lezg5071 6 лет назад +3

    The tangles that these narc s get you in is unbelievable.. such a waste of everyone's time and energy. I will never forget her eyes ..they were devilish but her smile was as nice and radiant. I was warned by my own subconscious bit sadly i ignored

  • @starlingswallow
    @starlingswallow 5 лет назад +2

    They show no interest. God....this breaks my heart. 💔 My ex had zero interest in me, my heart, my family, my passions, what breaks my heart, etc etc etc. When I left? He asked WHY? Seriously? The fact that he *DIDNT* see me dying inside for 13 years is a *HUGE RED FLAG!!!!!*
    nobody is worth being with while you feel like NOTHING. It's a slow, internal, silent DEATH.
    I wouldn't wish this kind of life on my worst enemy 😥😥😥😥💔💔💔💔

    • @tomd1434
      @tomd1434 5 лет назад +1

      I'm sorry to hear that. But in those 13 years did you tell him you were dying inside? I ask because sometimes people internalize pain but smile their way through and expect a selfish partner to sense it. But they're selfish fucks so they don't. Anyway hope you find someone better.

    • @starlingswallow
      @starlingswallow 4 года назад

      Tom D I did tell him. It only came up 2-4 times a year when I couldn't stuff all the feelings down any longer and I'd have an emotional breakdown. But he would get mad. He wouldn't hold me. He wouldn't seek change together as a couple. He'd stare at me while I wept and would be irritated my feelings came up at an inopportune time 😞💔 Every and any moment was an inopportune time.
      He just didn't care.
      Yes, I have found some one who also is healing from narcissistic abuse and we are truly happy ☺️ Thanks for asking!!

  • @gomenos54
    @gomenos54 4 года назад +3

    I totally agree with you, "we did not listen to our gut instinct" hence the prolonged suffering.

  • @ronfirek5824
    @ronfirek5824 3 года назад +1

    I hope he does what is right for his own sanity...she will have several on the go with you until she puts you on a shelf.
    All ANYONE is to the NARCISSIST is like an appliance like a fridge or stove and all NARCS get bored quickly. When fridge no longer works to their liking they throw it away. You deserve someone that truly cares about you.
    Blessings

  • @howtowithelizabeth7513
    @howtowithelizabeth7513 6 лет назад +3

    RUclips can really stop with the ads now there getting so annoying and I’m NOT buying RUclips red even if u cancel my account and make RUclips unusable without it for me
    Sorry girl but RUclips keeps shoving annoying ads in the middle of people’s videos and yours is one of them and I’m trying to learn from your video but it’s hard when it keeps getting cut off and I know for a fact that u didn’t put them in the one cut u off mid sentence
    I wonder if any of my videos have ads that I’m unaware of if so I’m sorry it’s RUclips fault

  • @wondervistastudios2388
    @wondervistastudios2388 4 года назад +1

    Wow, been married for 22 years to a woman I adore, but she will never reconcile ANY issue... and she has an endless list of issues against me. I’m having to divorce her because the rage fits are out of control and we live in two different realities... so sad.

  • @TheSeoforhire
    @TheSeoforhire 7 лет назад +18

    Thank you, this really reminded me of the mess I liberated myself from this summer.

    • @brianwalsh1401
      @brianwalsh1401 4 года назад

      Good. Your lucky. A lot of people stay stuck for long periods of time.

  • @leshahnhill
    @leshahnhill 5 лет назад +1

    Man!! Where are the women like you At???? My last two long term relationships were with straight up narcissistic women and all the red flags you mention I experienced them to the highest degrees. Hence, those relationships are definitely over just wish I could find a woman who is as mature and knowledgeable as you are.

  • @maureenleary7354
    @maureenleary7354 5 лет назад +5

    Getting married won't change this She will not change .

  • @deathseedsentry9884
    @deathseedsentry9884 4 года назад +2

    I was in a traumatic and abusive relationship durring the last couple of years of college that had me going from a confident strong individual, to a mere shadow of my formal self. This relationship left me questioning my self worth; my direction in life; and whether my self purpose had any meaning at all. The story is long and has many sorted details, but in short were had made plans to get married (she moved from in with me from China and I supported her completely), but after facing a crisis which she caused (she left a lit candle in the living room of my house that burned our house down causing me to have to save her life by getting her out of a window, while I went back in wearing only boxer shorts with a garden hose to put the fire out and save the lives of our pets. I could not save them all :"-("' ). She left me to go back home days before we planned to get married. I grew up in an abusive home and have faced situations people typically only see in psychological thrillers about child abuse and have fought tooth and nail to attain every and any ounce of success I have. Yet, my achievements and the man I have worked so hard to become almost seem to have ment nothing to her. There is so much more but I'd like to keep this short, unless you would like full background details on everything. I have been told I could sell my memoirs as a best seller book by my college cohorts who have heard some of my experiences. I am at a loss, emotionally, mentally, and physically.

    • @audreyandrea460
      @audreyandrea460 Год назад

      Hi, this is a late comment but I just want to say that I see you, I hear you, I feel you. She burned your house down. That’s next level.
      I became a Catholic as an adult in order to seek deliverance after suffering from a lifetime of horrific abuse, much like what you’re describing. It took 3 years, and I was abused by the priest who initiated me into the faith (I reported him, he was removed) but I was finally delivered by 2 good exorcists. My life has changed for the better. I pray that things turn around for you. 🙏💜

  • @warrencardwell6706
    @warrencardwell6706 7 лет назад +5

    Michele thanks for all you do, as you are helping a lot of people recover from narcissistic abuse including myself. Beautiful flowers in the back ground by the way.

  • @EclipsTV
    @EclipsTV Год назад +2

    Holy shit...this is the relationship I am in right now. word for word, play by play, result by result. I've been silenced, told and shown that my concerns mean nothing, I changed for her and got nothing in return, every little tiny mishap brings out her anger, no compromising, this is insane. This is my relationship for two years! I'm done.

    • @MRodriguez-gb8vc
      @MRodriguez-gb8vc 11 месяцев назад

      4 1/2yrs and just left mine. Once she realized I wasn't going to compromise myself anymore, I asked if with everything I did I meant so little to her, she said "I guess so..."