Elephant Seal Battle for the right to mate

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  • Опубликовано: 21 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 8 тыс.

  • @l.h.9747
    @l.h.9747 3 года назад +20417

    imagine sitting on the toilet and one of these breaks through the wall because it sounded like you want to pick a fight

  • @lilearthdragon5280
    @lilearthdragon5280 3 года назад +25236

    Their warrior cries be soundin' like a clogged toilet.

    • @FeliDJrah
      @FeliDJrah 3 года назад +539

      Yo true though. 🤣

    • @Davidpoland2005
      @Davidpoland2005 3 года назад +577

      pooping

    • @shizzil_l2051
      @shizzil_l2051 3 года назад +60

      fr

    • @t84t748748t6
      @t84t748748t6 3 года назад +380

      like some 1 shitting in a long pipe

    • @aka3316
      @aka3316 3 года назад +137

      Yeh fun thing, our shower drain sounds like this. 30 year old small drain....

  • @uwedergeschmeidige4734
    @uwedergeschmeidige4734 3 года назад +10313

    Other animal Sounds: Roaring, hissing or Barking
    Sea Elephants: *Aggressive Diarreah noises*

  • @Someaceguy1937
    @Someaceguy1937 Год назад +3871

    I love how seals range from adorable rotund sea puppies to whatever the hell you’d call this

  • @user-ny5cu5ol1p
    @user-ny5cu5ol1p 3 года назад +11173

    I'm amazed that an animal has evolved to intimidate his foes with the echoing sound of intense diarrhea in a toilet

    • @stungun3009
      @stungun3009 3 года назад +190

      LMAO😂😂😂

    • @drowjack
      @drowjack 3 года назад +109

      HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH NASTY

    • @Matt_from_Florida
      @Matt_from_Florida 3 года назад +328

      When I go in the bathroom and make those sounds people always leave. Give it a try!

    • @youneskasdi
      @youneskasdi 3 года назад +188

      @@Matt_from_Florida This guys knows how to be an alpha male, he also happened to be from florida

    • @Weaner69
      @Weaner69 3 года назад +57

      Final stages of evolution.

  • @Battury
    @Battury 3 года назад +8474

    Imagine being this large, this powerful, this destructive, and the only sound you can make sounds like you're having explosive diarrhea into the back of a snare drum.

  • @ohchinchindaisuke1927
    @ohchinchindaisuke1927 3 года назад +4023

    If you close your eyes it sounds like the most aggressive bathroom wars between two people fighting over flatulent exchanges.

  • @dank_smirk2ndchannel200
    @dank_smirk2ndchannel200 11 месяцев назад +733

    Elephant seal bull: *Gets a quarter of his nose ripped off*
    Also elephant seal bull: "I didn’t hear no bell!"

    • @digodeu-xe4ws
      @digodeu-xe4ws 7 месяцев назад +50

      tis but a scratch

    • @kluk8284
      @kluk8284 7 месяцев назад +19

      No way the small guy would have ever won

    • @Just_A_Guy_Here.
      @Just_A_Guy_Here. 6 месяцев назад +4

      I'm your 100th liker here & bye.

    • @dank_smirk2ndchannel200
      @dank_smirk2ndchannel200 6 месяцев назад +2

      @@Just_A_Guy_Here. thanks.

    • @fifthbusiness1678
      @fifthbusiness1678 5 месяцев назад +24

      He was half the weight of the other but gave up a good fight and seemed to be getting the better of him until he lost a third of his nose.

  • @Ombudsman08
    @Ombudsman08 3 года назад +4317

    Imagine fighting and trying to keep your nose from falling in your mouth.

    • @paleface171
      @paleface171 3 года назад +252

      We'd be in big trouble if these creatures had legs and arms.

    • @sadsackkvisling9694
      @sadsackkvisling9694 3 года назад +196

      "BEHOLD Muh mighty SNOOT!"

    • @we7034
      @we7034 3 года назад +95

      @@paleface171 actually, it's good for them that they don't have them, cuz then humans would terminate them.

    • @Dan_Kanerva
      @Dan_Kanerva 3 года назад +39

      @@we7034 or their limbs would break under their torso anatomy

    • @stew1375
      @stew1375 3 года назад +9

      holy shit my sides. i didnt realize that

  • @Naludaking819
    @Naludaking819 3 года назад +3441

    It’s like watching a giant thumb war

  • @tuckerricklefs4830
    @tuckerricklefs4830 3 года назад +3558

    This feels like something straight out of an alien planet. It is crazy to think these massive creatures are real.

    • @jbjaguar2717
      @jbjaguar2717 3 года назад +150

      That's because the aliens from movies are based on stuff like this.

    • @user-bo1ej5im9t
      @user-bo1ej5im9t 3 года назад +39

      @@jbjaguar2717 or weird humanoid big brain-time Huge eyes Lanky leg People with green Mold skin with only 4 Long fingers

    • @jahjahjah213
      @jahjahjah213 3 года назад +25

      That's what I was thinking. What an awesome world we live in!

    • @arthurmorgan4672
      @arthurmorgan4672 3 года назад +18

      The sound, sounds like someone taking a massive dump in the toilet.

    • @linac4833
      @linac4833 3 года назад +2

      exactly

  • @-X0N
    @-X0N 10 месяцев назад +402

    Notice how confident the aggressor was, always positioning himself at the high ground. Obi-wan would be proud

    • @vespenegas261
      @vespenegas261 6 месяцев назад +8

      I agree. This needs more lightsabers

    • @JoseRafael-oc3xu
      @JoseRafael-oc3xu 4 месяца назад +4

      I wish Biden was this aggressive…

    • @asia1174
      @asia1174 2 месяца назад +1

      Right, and I think he didn’t attack as much because he felt less threatened. And he’s a bit bigger too, it was over from the start

    • @21DaHoagie12
      @21DaHoagie12 4 дня назад

      Remember when darth maul had the high ground? 😂😂😂

  • @jackcristo1628
    @jackcristo1628 3 года назад +4220

    My mans out here spoonin' when suddenly, in the distance, a hater appears.

  • @andrewklyce-mariscal1564
    @andrewklyce-mariscal1564 3 года назад +4249

    Having heard these in person, this recording doesn't do justice to how terrifying that noise is. Balls of steel to the guy filming

    • @dawid2383
      @dawid2383 3 года назад +414

      To be fair if you are keeping distance it is to slow to do you any harm.

    • @MrScar665
      @MrScar665 3 года назад +491

      @@dawid2383 Agree but just imagine the sight of this thing chasing you

    • @sealdew5348
      @sealdew5348 3 года назад +207

      @@MrScar665 i think if i were just taking a swim and then an elephant seal just starts roaring, id start bookinggg

    • @XavierAway
      @XavierAway 3 года назад +80

      He has balls of steel only if he’s not fast enough to run away, and believe you me you would have to be pretty damn slow

    • @MrScar665
      @MrScar665 3 года назад +102

      @Engineer Gaming I would run like hell. Not gonna lie I think the idea of slapping the big boi on the back before he turns away and chases me is pretty funny

  • @hockeytalk13
    @hockeytalk13 3 года назад +2567

    Imagine living in that house and just waking up to this fuckery out your window? "Christ sake Larry here we go again"

    • @flowrepins6663
      @flowrepins6663 3 года назад +70

      they just watch like is a mix between ufc and animal planet 1:37

    • @vesuviusp.5831
      @vesuviusp.5831 3 года назад +3

      😂😂😁

    • @landlockedcroat1554
      @landlockedcroat1554 3 года назад

      lul

    • @nightmarebeatscatcher7664
      @nightmarebeatscatcher7664 3 года назад

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @lilmikey1275
      @lilmikey1275 3 года назад +16

      Imagine this being a normal everyday occurrence for someone. They wake up and go outside with their robe and cup of coffee and just smile as this happens.

  • @seangallagher1947
    @seangallagher1947 Год назад +533

    Props to the slightly smaller one for holding its ground, it was surprisingly strong too compared to the larger intruder.

    • @human6826
      @human6826 11 месяцев назад +5

      I think they are same one of them had the high ground btw

    • @Whydoweneedhandlesagain
      @Whydoweneedhandlesagain 10 месяцев назад

      That’s why he fucks

    • @PrincipalSkinner3190
      @PrincipalSkinner3190 10 месяцев назад +43

      ​@@human6826 Please get your eyes checked, they aren't even close to the same size.

    • @second4871
      @second4871 8 месяцев назад +14

      I was rooting for him too, he had a good advantage at long range, he was faster, he had good timing. He was winning the fight with a big advantage, but he made a mistake - he went to close range. In the clinch he missed a bite and it was over for him.

    • @bigbean2587
      @bigbean2587 7 месяцев назад +22

      @@second4871 The small one may have been faster but i'm fairly certain he was young as he made too many mistakes. The larger bull did not engage until he saw an opportunity, and you can also see that the smaller one did nearly no damage at all.

  • @BeepDragon
    @BeepDragon 3 года назад +3651

    The smaller one had half it's face torn off and still didn't retreat right away. These creatures are incredible

    • @Mephitinae
      @Mephitinae 3 года назад +357

      Then he went right into the saltwater with a gaping wound. Ouch.

    • @BeepDragon
      @BeepDragon 3 года назад +88

      @@Mephitinae yeah that looked brutal

    • @elih9700
      @elih9700 3 года назад +207

      @@Mephitinae Best thing to help clean the wound.

    • @maximumgas9448
      @maximumgas9448 3 года назад +34

      Thw horny helped him

    • @bruno2dj
      @bruno2dj 3 года назад +24

      Akainu vs Shirohige, colorised

  • @mr.blueitachi5258
    @mr.blueitachi5258 3 года назад +3842

    Me : *flushes toilet *
    Elephant seal: i dare u say that again

    • @mr.blueitachi5258
      @mr.blueitachi5258 3 года назад +178

      @@killekillekille1 me : *farts *
      Elephant seal : and i took that personally

    • @mikehunt9632
      @mikehunt9632 3 года назад +10

      Cripple fight!

    • @Randy1337
      @Randy1337 3 года назад +3

    • @ricardogallardo8284
      @ricardogallardo8284 3 года назад +12

      Lmaoooo. Original was the best one.

    • @WOLF800K
      @WOLF800K 3 года назад +6

      0:48 You Hear This In The Distance

  • @monsterfanatic5344
    @monsterfanatic5344 2 года назад +2219

    The larger bull wasn't even attacking at first. He was just stanced up and tanking all of those attacks head on. What a beast, good lord.

    • @TristanBiological
      @TristanBiological  2 года назад +212

      All about the strategy

    • @danielgaffney6690
      @danielgaffney6690 11 месяцев назад +205

      @@TristanBiological legit, I think he was waiting for a good opening, and he got one, tearing the other guys nose like that.

    • @schmoneyyak
      @schmoneyyak 11 месяцев назад +149

      I love how we can see the exact moment the smaller one realizes it’s a losing battle and starts backing away. Seems like the big guy understood that perfectly and started turning up the aggression.

    • @armintor2826
      @armintor2826 11 месяцев назад +65

      He knew he could tank it with those bigass calluses around his neck

    • @diobrando5974
      @diobrando5974 11 месяцев назад +42

      Ye, that’s what I thought. Why would he attack when he’s way larger? He tried to intimidate to avoid some damage too, but when that didn’t work, well… he bit off his face

  • @Harchatur14
    @Harchatur14 7 месяцев назад +214

    The girl runs away with a third elephant seal meanwhile 😂

    • @Love-h6s
      @Love-h6s 6 месяцев назад +8

      😂😂👍👍

    • @-lord1754
      @-lord1754 5 месяцев назад +11

    • @PsychedeliaMind
      @PsychedeliaMind 3 месяца назад +3

      No solo en elefantes Marinos pasa , ya me pasó. 😢😂

    • @Delicious12347
      @Delicious12347 3 месяца назад

      ​@@PsychedeliaMindNaturaleza promiscua, que se le va hacer. 🙃

    • @asia1174
      @asia1174 2 месяца назад +4

      She’s the real intellectual here lol

  • @goddessmodel
    @goddessmodel 3 года назад +2041

    are they seriously fighting in turn based combat?!

    • @Rayedrgn02
      @Rayedrgn02 3 года назад +399

      Survival of the fattest

    • @EssexAggiegrad2011
      @EssexAggiegrad2011 3 года назад +229

      Elephant seals live in a RPG

    • @elcomemierda2624
      @elcomemierda2624 3 года назад +127

      It's slow because their agility stats are minimal

    • @vampiric172
      @vampiric172 3 года назад +84

      The right the one was charging his attack

    • @kingghidorah8106
      @kingghidorah8106 3 года назад +51

      right one was bigger and thus tougher, he'd wait til the smaller one became tired. However the smaller seal did very good making the bigger one fall under his own weight when rushing. Too bad he got his nose broken and he also got trapped against a wall

  • @kaktussurvival6782
    @kaktussurvival6782 3 года назад +3696

    That poor smaller guy just lost a half of his nose, and still tried to fight, brave dude.

    • @adawnicusautocon
      @adawnicusautocon 3 года назад +335

      Yeah, and I was rooting for him to avenge his nose

    • @Bake-kurijra
      @Bake-kurijra 3 года назад +215

      The little guy barely did any damage to the larger guy will the larger guy bet the snot out of the little guy

    • @Istrianprincess
      @Istrianprincess 3 года назад +105

      The smaller guy was very stupid he should know not to fight with the big guys

    • @Bake-kurijra
      @Bake-kurijra 3 года назад +203

      @@bigboydownstairs9651 yes but the bigger one POV is : it’s over anakin I have the high ground
      Small guy : you underestimate my power
      Big guy : don’t try it
      Small one Lips at big one
      Big one after ripping small ones nose : you where the chosen one
      Small one : I hate you

    • @bigboydownstairs9651
      @bigboydownstairs9651 3 года назад +112

      Poor lil guy was a lot smaller and at a down hill disadvantage. It got tough to watch tbh

  • @AlohaBiatch
    @AlohaBiatch 3 года назад +4115

    Imagine the pain of jumping into saltwater with half your nose ripped off 😭😭😭

    • @deepslumbersweetdreams8213
      @deepslumbersweetdreams8213 3 года назад +291

      It would burn too😣

    • @ezamorazamora6978
      @ezamorazamora6978 3 года назад +244

      Dam he did rip off part of his nose huh

    • @jonathanbulkheed338
      @jonathanbulkheed338 3 года назад +359

      That was a fucked up move! He knew he bit onto the other guy's nose and said "fuck it, this shit is coming off".

    • @davidrinmawia2959
      @davidrinmawia2959 3 года назад +27

      @@jonathanbulkheed338 no his opponent bit his tongue not himself you can see 3:06

    • @jonathanbulkheed338
      @jonathanbulkheed338 3 года назад +198

      @@davidrinmawia2959 I can see it has nothing to do with a tongue. Lol

  • @JaamiJiwa
    @JaamiJiwa Год назад +90

    I love how Worf comes to the crest of the hill at the start, sounds his toilet war cry, and then clambers down as fatly as possible into battle. Like a less-dramatic Charge of the Rohirrim.

    • @thebirdguardien.14
      @thebirdguardien.14 Месяц назад

      they're so fat,too. i'm amazed that they can live like that. they're like fat people.

  • @dylanhill4428
    @dylanhill4428 3 года назад +1824

    God the big guy took like 30 free hits to show how tough shit he was, what a MONSTER

    • @tmar8959
      @tmar8959 3 года назад +67

      Funny you say shit when all the other comments are saying they sound like clogged toilets 😂

    • @d0sxxgaming94
      @d0sxxgaming94 3 года назад +88

      it was actually strategy to not tire out and wait for a position to do a critical bite for some real damage. 3:04 after that the tables turned on the one that looked like he was doing more attacks

    • @hatusnee
      @hatusnee 3 года назад +69

      You can tell he's a veteran bc of all the scabbing on his chest

    • @xpan195
      @xpan195 3 года назад +28

      And he ended up winning too. Don’t f*ck with the king 👀👀

    • @YRO.
      @YRO. 3 года назад +15

      @@xpan195 The "King" literally attacked the other one

  • @damuvang1915
    @damuvang1915 3 года назад +944

    0:18 he came out like a warrior in a movie. On top of the hill making his battle cry issuing a challenge to single combat.

    • @hassuntzu6523
      @hassuntzu6523 3 года назад +77

      Just like a warrior, he found someone with his girl

    • @damuvang1915
      @damuvang1915 3 года назад +54

      @@hassuntzu6523 And she leaves just as when they fight for her honor. Don’t think she’s watching anymore. 😂😂

    • @stevetownley5480
      @stevetownley5480 3 года назад +11

      A little lest climatic if you ask me but still true nonetheless

    • @rashodhustle9718
      @rashodhustle9718 3 года назад +13

      @@damuvang1915 shes probably like on to the next

    • @kdesano8
      @kdesano8 3 года назад +14

      Looks badass but it sounds like someone having a bad shit coming out his ass.

  • @McCracken_9
    @McCracken_9 3 года назад +2227

    And then the husband came home early

    • @TristanBiological
      @TristanBiological  3 года назад +157

      And now I HAVE to do an edit of this to 'trapped in the closet'.

    • @thegift1640
      @thegift1640 3 года назад +4

      Насчёт хасбенда ничего не понятно , звук такой будто ведро с гайками таращиш через поле

    • @MrWhatdafuBOOM
      @MrWhatdafuBOOM 3 года назад +32

      And he was shocked to see he wasn't the only one who came early.

    • @seretith3513
      @seretith3513 3 года назад

      That Husband is a Hybocrit given his Harem

    • @MrWhatdafuBOOM
      @MrWhatdafuBOOM 3 года назад

      @@seretith3513*hypocrite

  • @jkennard10
    @jkennard10 8 месяцев назад +108

    These animals are so goofy looking. But they're actual monsters that'll bite chunks out of each other just to rizz up the ladies.

    • @Kwisatz_HaderachXIII
      @Kwisatz_HaderachXIII 4 месяца назад +2

      You are describing humans right?

    • @Isa-sb9jn
      @Isa-sb9jn 2 месяца назад +2

      ​@@Kwisatz_HaderachXIIIseals?
      At least I hope no one bites chunks out of each other

  • @fluffywhitellama4144
    @fluffywhitellama4144 3 года назад +2247

    So this dude just shows up and steals the other ones girlfriend
    That's sad man

    • @Dan_Kanerva
      @Dan_Kanerva 3 года назад +191

      the girlfriend left both of them when they started figthing... she will wait for her lover to come back and retake his honor

    • @FumanyuX
      @FumanyuX 3 года назад +80

      No, the opossite, the smaller one had stolen her

    • @MrExade
      @MrExade 3 года назад +96

      The dominant male has the right to mate, only a beta would say it's sad.

    • @Dan_Kanerva
      @Dan_Kanerva 3 года назад +333

      @@MrExade lol 4channer

    • @justakidwithnolife5671
      @justakidwithnolife5671 3 года назад +214

      @@MrExade go back from whence you came, you basement dweller.

  • @colemonson8772
    @colemonson8772 3 года назад +4931

    alternative title: two discord mods fight over an egirl

  • @michaelmythology
    @michaelmythology 3 года назад +1943

    "It's over Anakin! I have the high ground!"

    • @swellerferret2506
      @swellerferret2506 3 года назад +65

      “You will not take her from me!”

    • @NamekFreakazoid
      @NamekFreakazoid 3 года назад +79

      "You underestiMATE my power!"

    • @swellerferret2506
      @swellerferret2506 3 года назад +42

      @@NamekFreakazoid “My anger and lust for mating have already done that.”

    • @Theodoros_pap_zearg
      @Theodoros_pap_zearg 3 года назад +19

      @@NamekFreakazoid don't try it

    • @amser7
      @amser7 3 года назад +11

      @@Theodoros_pap_zearg AAAAAAAA (gets reject from mating)

  • @SurajKumar-ln8ij
    @SurajKumar-ln8ij 2 месяца назад +15

    Honesty this is one of the best documented recording of wildlife fight yet.

  • @brianbommarito3376
    @brianbommarito3376 3 года назад +974

    I feel sorry for the old, battle-scarred one. He fought really hard at first. The big one was like, “I’ll mess with your head by just roarin’, let you wear yourself out, and as soon as I get my nose out of my mouth, I’ll mop the floor with you,” and then he did.

    • @taidanagaming6800
      @taidanagaming6800 3 года назад +33

      I laughed way harder than I should have at this comment 😂😂😂

    • @peramenehera7054
      @peramenehera7054 3 года назад +35

      I mean since he has all those scars he probably already got some mad puss in his days

    • @ChristopherX30
      @ChristopherX30 3 года назад +5

      😂😂🤣

    • @SkrunkyTheClown
      @SkrunkyTheClown 3 года назад +19

      @@peramenehera7054 prolly.
      But out with the old and in with the new, basically how it works in nature. And for humans too

    • @ishzarkklyon9590
      @ishzarkklyon9590 3 года назад +1

      Thragg vs Conquest and the left one was Conquest

  • @GB-um2lf
    @GB-um2lf 3 года назад +1411

    One on the right employed Obiwan tactics, dude had the highground the whole fight.

    • @squilliamfancyson1080
      @squilliamfancyson1080 3 года назад +54

      Here we can see an excellent example of how powerful the high ground truly is: Elephant seal bodies are extremely blubbery which gives them some of the highest resistance to damage in the animal kingdom but their big floppy proboscise are very soft and sensitive and one good bite there can easily win a seal the fight. We can see this happening in the video when the opponents nose gets bit and ripped open and he loses almost all his will to fight and loses the battle soon after. Elephant seals are also far too heavy to jump or lift themselves of the ground, however far their neck can reach is all the range that they have. They also lack any agility or dexterity on land beyond just biting things, meaning things like dodging or outmaneuvering is impossible. So by standing on ground high enough to put your proboscis out of reach of the enemy seals bite, you have essentially made it impossible for them to reach your weakpoint while simultaneously making it far easier for you to attack their's.
      High ground is broken, pls nerf

    • @ladypain_thelegend5949
      @ladypain_thelegend5949 3 года назад +12

      @@squilliamfancyson1080 Ngl, I thought he bit his own nose with how aggressive and wildly he was going for those bites; it looks like they can easily bite their own trunk.

    • @ryu-ken
      @ryu-ken 3 года назад +3

      The other dude is smart. He took the high ground. Has more leverage for devastating blows and made it harder for low ground guy to hit him

    • @Totyen
      @Totyen 3 года назад +1

      Was looking for this comment, was not disappointed

    • @sadsackkvisling9694
      @sadsackkvisling9694 3 года назад +1

      So original.

  • @Pasta13
    @Pasta13 3 года назад +404

    1:01 if that pole to his right wasn’t there you would think that 500 ft tall elephant seal Kaiju is attacking what looks like Northern Ireland

    • @Noname-gr1zp
      @Noname-gr1zp 3 года назад +22

      Titanius Sea Elephant

    • @peterd4047
      @peterd4047 3 года назад +13

      I legit was thinking the same thing we have similar minds 😂

    • @davecrupel2817
      @davecrupel2817 3 года назад

      That's what it looked like! Haha

    • @MrOrangeonion
      @MrOrangeonion 3 года назад

      damn right i thought it was flippin huge at that point

  • @HenrythePaleoGuy
    @HenrythePaleoGuy Год назад +20

    The towering over the hill in that intro is incredibly intimidating. Crazy animals.

  • @andread4595
    @andread4595 2 года назад +2073

    I like how the girly slips out and “runs“ away when she sees them about to get into it😂

    • @TristanBiological
      @TristanBiological  2 года назад +366

      she's very sneaky, and totally played these males against each other. Well played Tyra!

    • @brienfoaboutanything9037
      @brienfoaboutanything9037 2 года назад

      Thats amazing information about Elephant seal: ruclips.net/video/CqpwESUndUQ/видео.html

    • @paxhumana2015
      @paxhumana2015 2 года назад +21

      @@TristanBiological , whenever I saw the cow, and the two bulls that were fixing to fight, I immediately thought of Side B of Karate Champ, and the NES version of its introduction theme. ( ruclips.net/video/Pqrc9D78Uyc/видео.html&ab_channel=GBelair ) If the guy that was in the background with the camera was moving, and that they also had said things like "Begin", "Stop", "Judge", Half Point", and "Full Point", and had some red and white flags, then it totally would have been an elephant seal version of that game.

    • @Bake-kurijra
      @Bake-kurijra Год назад +8

      @@paxhumana2015 yo seal fighters that needs to be a real game

    • @dougfredricks2017
      @dougfredricks2017 Год назад +6

      Girly:"But the other Seal waited 3 years..."

  • @kenadams9376
    @kenadams9376 3 года назад +336

    It sounds like a rough morning on the toilet after a rough night of drinking cheap beer.

    • @Tony-112
      @Tony-112 3 года назад +13

      And taco bell

  • @ChannelZero1031
    @ChannelZero1031 3 года назад +1106

    1:36 I like how the female seal just looks around and says, "I am out."

    • @we7034
      @we7034 3 года назад +123

      this a real life lesson, man lost his nose for her and she just quit to mate with bully

    • @lukaogadze5071
      @lukaogadze5071 3 года назад +38

      typical in all species

    • @deathcap.
      @deathcap. 3 года назад +125

      Nah if you watch the other video that shows the whole thing, that smaller one is a challenger who snuck in and tried to force himself on her. The one that comes over the hill and wins is her actual man

    • @skateboarding118
      @skateboarding118 3 года назад +9

      @@we7034 Yep, wait at the finish like and f the winner is their dating strategy.

    • @doge2629
      @doge2629 3 года назад +15

      aight imma head out

  • @Cornerboy73
    @Cornerboy73 10 месяцев назад +23

    The little one ran away shaking his nose barking "This isn't over Abelard, we shall finish this duel another day - arf arf arf !!!" Then he made his escape down the conveniently laid-out Elephant Seal slipway next to the wharf.

  • @michaelyu2744
    @michaelyu2744 3 года назад +742

    I kept feeling like they would crash through the wall of a house and continue fighting in there anyway while destroying the furniture

    • @cookiecola5852
      @cookiecola5852 3 года назад +27

      LOL not impossible😂

    • @southernfried8502
      @southernfried8502 3 года назад +46

      Well the average male northern elephant seal does weigh around 2.5 tons. And it's obvious to see they have a high pain tolerance.

    • @danatedawg1018
      @danatedawg1018 3 года назад +14

      I...would absolutely love to see that

    • @SafiSierra87
      @SafiSierra87 3 года назад +5

      They could most certainly do that

    • @goldiegoose8975
      @goldiegoose8975 3 года назад +10

      They’d be like Peter and the giant chicken

  • @zcarp8642
    @zcarp8642 2 года назад +1091

    Fun fact. They're practically shouting their names at each other. Each male has a rhythm of bellows that make up their name.

    • @tomatogenesis
      @tomatogenesis Год назад +113

      Maybe Groot isn't so weird to us after all

    • @evancalles1411
      @evancalles1411 11 месяцев назад +79

      lol pokemon

    • @randomguy6152
      @randomguy6152 11 месяцев назад +27

      source? unless this is a pokemon joke

    • @evancalles1411
      @evancalles1411 11 месяцев назад +14

      @@randomguy6152 pokemon (except a few) only speak in their name

    • @AK-jt7kh
      @AK-jt7kh 11 месяцев назад +129

      I want this to be a thing in male human fights. Just like
      "Dave"
      "Rob"
      "DAVE!"
      "ROB!!"

  • @AverytheCubanAmerican
    @AverytheCubanAmerican 3 года назад +1152

    0:25
    *"It's over, Anaseal. I have the high ground"*

    • @emilioalvarez7745
      @emilioalvarez7745 3 года назад +16

      😂😂😂

    • @DeadmanInc336
      @DeadmanInc336 3 года назад +10

      You idiot... 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @jakubgrono9070
      @jakubgrono9070 3 года назад +25

      Diarreah noises intensifies

    • @fulcrum6008
      @fulcrum6008 3 года назад +36

      "You underestimate my power of diarrhea roaring!"

    • @Arenas95
      @Arenas95 3 года назад +5

      Anaseal.... 😂😂😂

  • @YG-rr6zv
    @YG-rr6zv 8 месяцев назад +77

    Elephant seal: Our fight will be LEGENDARY!
    **Explosive diarrhoea noise intensifies**

  • @MRSLAV
    @MRSLAV 3 года назад +3597

    Jesus, they have one tough skin

    • @Jestiii
      @Jestiii 3 года назад +51

      Wait WTF SLAV? YOU HERE?

    • @Davidpoland2005
      @Davidpoland2005 3 года назад +80

      top hardest to beat creatures in the world

    • @mistydayremainsofthejudgment
      @mistydayremainsofthejudgment 3 года назад +182

      and they are covered in scars and callouses right around the neck area, from biting each other! it's insane how massive and strong these things are!

    • @Mikeeeeeeeeeeeeeee3
      @Mikeeeeeeeeeeeeeee3 3 года назад +7

      Hello slav

    • @whatareyoudoingstepcomment4029
      @whatareyoudoingstepcomment4029 3 года назад +46

      not as tough enough to withstands my barret m82 50 cal sniper

  • @stovepip
    @stovepip 3 года назад +449

    Love how the big one is baiting the little one to strike, only to strike back at critical points

    • @TristanBiological
      @TristanBiological  3 года назад +106

      The strategy of experience. They probably run out of steam having to lumber around like that.

    • @FatalShotGG
      @FatalShotGG 3 года назад +14

      @@TristanBiological The bigger one also lacerated the smaller one's nose

    • @jfchadwick11
      @jfchadwick11 3 года назад +13

      "Little one" being a relative term here 😬

    • @Akaryusan
      @Akaryusan 2 года назад +10

      You don't get to stay the biggest by being an idiot, even a seal has to use strategy

  • @axlh.1827
    @axlh.1827 3 года назад +1281

    Lady seals when they hear clogged toilet sounds: ooohh sexy

    • @adamkerman475
      @adamkerman475 3 года назад +84

      Here’s some dating advice: take the girl you like to dinner and take a dump on the table she’ll fall for you instantly

    • @moodyowlproductions4287
      @moodyowlproductions4287 3 года назад +5

      @@adamkerman475 elephant bull seal"look pal it ok for my species to crap anyway we like but not for you humans ok"

    • @brokendaboken348
      @brokendaboken348 3 года назад +9

      Everyone has their taste

    • @axlh.1827
      @axlh.1827 3 года назад +2

      @@adamkerman475 lmaooo

    • @moodyowlproductions4287
      @moodyowlproductions4287 3 года назад +3

      @@brokendaboken348 in this case it a crap taste

  • @Ranolog
    @Ranolog Год назад +10

    I like how when the other ones nose got really damaged, they were like "time out time out!" For a second. I was thinking the bigger one was gonna be like "ill get mum just wait here!" until they started fighting again

  • @thevisitor1012
    @thevisitor1012 3 года назад +395

    *Little guy lands 100 combos, then gets bit on the snout*
    “Aight I’m done”

    • @ano2101
      @ano2101 3 года назад +35

      It’s like you’re working you’re ass off and get hit by gogeta lvl 7

    • @youneskasdi
      @youneskasdi 3 года назад +17

      Size does matter after all

    • @nadinecreary9938
      @nadinecreary9938 3 года назад +26

      It got torn open really bad 3:48

    • @enjoyer2227
      @enjoyer2227 3 года назад +15

      He had to have all of that swag to even do a little bit of damage but the big one landed three Crush Counters and won the match. Smh, this shit ain’t fair man...

    • @julesop3866
      @julesop3866 3 года назад +1

      @@enjoyer2227 R.i.P

  • @medicgaming101
    @medicgaming101 3 года назад +386

    The guy who lives in the house:
    “HOLY SHIT! FREE CONTENT!”

  • @raininggrey1165
    @raininggrey1165 3 года назад +878

    The most significant part about this battle was at this moment: 1:06
    Truly magnificent

    • @marcoAKAjoe
      @marcoAKAjoe 3 года назад +13

      Lol

    • @dtop.flocka
      @dtop.flocka 3 года назад +6

      @@marcoAKAjoe 😂

    • @samuell3bara888
      @samuell3bara888 3 года назад +9

      Thanks bro you made me laugh so much

    • @mariadelacruz1153
      @mariadelacruz1153 3 года назад +27

      Imagine getting trampled by that

    • @giacomoromano8842
      @giacomoromano8842 Год назад +4

      Bro, if that thing was charging at me like that, i would be running the fuck away and thanks Evolution that i am two legged.

  • @LukeRion-nt6cu
    @LukeRion-nt6cu Год назад +29

    You can tell the smaller one has been at this for a while. he’s showing skill

    • @kingc1331
      @kingc1331 2 дня назад

      Hardly big one is missing an eye and has battle scars clearly an experienced fighter small one stood no chance

  • @miguellilly8859
    @miguellilly8859 3 года назад +496

    Small elephant seal:(Doing quick bites
    Big elephant seal: You fight like young man nothing held back, admirable but mistake.

    • @ShankX10
      @ShankX10 3 года назад +79

      Then he pulls the DAD move on the young man "I GOT YOUR NOSE".

    • @noobmaster6823
      @noobmaster6823 3 года назад +16

      @@ShankX10 r/cursedcomments

    • @lefu7812
      @lefu7812 3 года назад +21

      @@ShankX10 you think your nose is your ally? You ve merely adopted it

    • @neilalexander65
      @neilalexander65 3 года назад +1

      @@lefu7812 lool

    • @jacobzland3609
      @jacobzland3609 3 года назад +6

      @@lefu7812 I was born in it, moulded by it. I didn’t smell the diarrhea until I was a man, by then it was nothing to me but RANCID!

  • @Castillo525
    @Castillo525 3 года назад +770

    The one on the right (newcomer) was larger and stronger, but the one on the left has the fighting spirit. He'll train and come for revenge the next mating season 😂👌🏻

    • @TristanBiological
      @TristanBiological  3 года назад +140

      He successfully mated a few times, but your totally right that he's the future Beachmaster very soon!

    • @TheMendo123
      @TheMendo123 3 года назад +40

      The one on the right is the beachmaster I think. Looks like the smaller one is probably younger and was mating with a female on the larger beachmaster's turf. He is too small but looks scrappy and will probably be a beachmaster in the future. The larger one may also be getting old and losing his edge and ferocity in battle it looks like

    • @TristanBiological
      @TristanBiological  3 года назад +66

      @@TheMendo123 absolutely. He did mate with that female 5 times prior to this conflict, so that might explain why he's pretty chill with this bit of competition. After this fight there was no more questioning of the Beachmaster's dominance.

    • @kevinlawson6188
      @kevinlawson6188 3 года назад +18

      I'll be right back...after I eat 10,000 more fish.

    • @aereiq
      @aereiq 3 года назад +18

      @@TristanBiological still fought even when part of nose was missing.

  • @Frosst
    @Frosst 3 года назад +922

    Elephant Seal: “Yo..u.. You should’ve gone for the snout” *gurgls*

  • @gusto8585
    @gusto8585 9 месяцев назад +4

    Third time rewatching This Showdown... It was alot more entertaining than a Mayweather Fight!! And it was free... thank you!!

    • @TristanBiological
      @TristanBiological  9 месяцев назад +1

      what they lack in fancy footwork, is made up in haymakers!

  • @BlueWallFull4331
    @BlueWallFull4331 3 года назад +422

    This was brutal to watch. Those bites and when he got him by the snout. That would of taken my arm off

    • @TristanBiological
      @TristanBiological  3 года назад +80

      They're so hardcore! We estimated that big guy (Beachmaster on the right) around 2000kg and just a bit under 5m long.

    • @barbary13
      @barbary13 3 года назад +35

      @@TristanBiological jeez thats crazy, and i've heard southern elephant seals can grow up to 4000kg!

    • @TristanBiological
      @TristanBiological  3 года назад +41

      @@barbary13 oh yeah, they're almost 2x as big as the Northern's. But their noses look a little less flappy.

    • @flashgordon6510
      @flashgordon6510 3 года назад +3

      @@TristanBiological Wow! Must be amazing to see and hear up close and in person.

    • @supernovagirl5741
      @supernovagirl5741 3 года назад +2

      Yeah it's messed up lol

  • @doot7779
    @doot7779 3 года назад +184

    That fight was over once he tore off that nose

  • @Atomicallyawesome.
    @Atomicallyawesome. 3 года назад +448

    Wow the challenger sure came in a beast, he allowed his opponent to get some free hits off at the beginning and still messed him up in the end. Kept doing his war cry because he didn't even acknowledge his opponent as a true male. Wow... What an absolute legend

    • @jakubgoaszewski7777
      @jakubgoaszewski7777 3 года назад +30

      What a Chad

    • @trashrat8365
      @trashrat8365 3 года назад +7

      You can hear the exactly moment the losing male’s resolve is broken too

    • @endingworlds
      @endingworlds 3 года назад +17

      He was letting him get tired, like in a real fight.

    • @k.r.99
      @k.r.99 3 года назад +1

      @@endingworlds Muhammad Ali style ^^

    • @mysoncrumphaseveryinjury3853
      @mysoncrumphaseveryinjury3853 3 года назад +2

      The losing one was in a bad spot as well-closer to the water

  • @pedrourbano501
    @pedrourbano501 Год назад +26

    I'm actually surprised that it moves as fast as it does not having legs or arms and being that heavy.

    • @TristanBiological
      @TristanBiological  Год назад +6

      shockingly fast

    • @Ibloop
      @Ibloop 11 месяцев назад +1

      The inertia from is surprisingly effective

    • @Ibloop
      @Ibloop 11 месяцев назад +5

      The inertia from its blubber is surprisingly effective

  • @ryansparks9257
    @ryansparks9257 3 года назад +506

    Imagine having to fight for dominance while trying to avoid getting your own face dongus in your mouth while also trying to get ahold of your opponents.

    • @beeb5872
      @beeb5872 2 года назад +31

      I will never stop calling it a 'face dongus' from this point onwards.

    • @w3ird_gurl638
      @w3ird_gurl638 2 года назад +2

      Giant Dic-

    • @w3ird_gurl638
      @w3ird_gurl638 2 года назад +16

      @@beeb5872 Ngl Squidward must be mad he ain't the only one with a big nose🤚😭

    • @malawianalphawolf
      @malawianalphawolf 2 года назад +1

      The life 'Nice Guys' and Incels claim to live.

    • @aliciawalker6624
      @aliciawalker6624 2 года назад +4

      I cant stop laughing 😭😭😭😭

  • @user-dm4gb2kr5v
    @user-dm4gb2kr5v 3 года назад +1124

    this is like watching a pokemon battle in real life

    • @TristanBiological
      @TristanBiological  3 года назад +131

      With the only abilities being tackle and bite

    • @eatinggum9093
      @eatinggum9093 3 года назад +9

      Real life just like bideo game

    • @tehuti5207
      @tehuti5207 3 года назад +17

      @@TristanBiological And splash

    • @andree1kk986
      @andree1kk986 3 года назад

      Right lol

    • @shrapnel95
      @shrapnel95 3 года назад +4

      And sounds like Pokémon sharting

  • @gio-gioarmani2268
    @gio-gioarmani2268 3 года назад +362

    The long pauses during the battle are like:
    ,,Oh hey dude calm down for a sec, my nose is in my mouth-"
    ,,Yeah same dude hol up-"
    ,,Okey done, lets continue"

    • @carlosbalazs2492
      @carlosbalazs2492 3 года назад +18

      Nah, those pauses are bathroom breaks

    • @averyniceguy3964
      @averyniceguy3964 3 года назад +4

      Time to wait for the smartasses to comment and ruin the whole joke

    • @RrRr-or5tw
      @RrRr-or5tw 3 года назад +3

      I mean that thing probably has its purpose but it really seems like a disability

    • @nena_picante1425
      @nena_picante1425 3 года назад

      Lmfaoooo

  • @conorbennett7353
    @conorbennett7353 2 месяца назад +3

    You may not like it, but this is what peak male performance looks like.

  • @gavinlamp5426
    @gavinlamp5426 3 года назад +333

    I hear a hybrid of the Imdominus Rex growl, and 8 hours after consuming 4 Mexican pizzas from taco bell

  • @juanhomerodiaz6310
    @juanhomerodiaz6310 3 года назад +650

    The champ had speed, but the challenger was heavier, stronger, he showed the champ that he could take his power and not budge, and when he got ahold of his face he showed him just how brutal he could be.
    A great fight, both warriors showed heart and great sportsmanship.

    • @dseanwest
      @dseanwest 2 года назад +59

      U sayin this like we in the Olympics 😂

    • @uncle3134
      @uncle3134 2 года назад +5

      Yeah the champ could take his power but the challenger could take his nose lol

    • @celtiberian
      @celtiberian 2 года назад +15

      The larger one also appeared to have a ticker skin on the neck. He fought more battles than the smaller one.

    • @JonHop1
      @JonHop1 Год назад +45

      @@celtiberian the bigger one is the dominant bull and not the challenger. What happened here is clear. A smaller bull was attempting to mate wit the larger bulls females so the big bull stepped in and tore his face off..

    • @mitchellheuser8769
      @mitchellheuser8769 Год назад +7

      I think the champ was who won the battle, the other guy was stealing his girl

  • @rainyfriday6175
    @rainyfriday6175 3 года назад +366

    Damn, homie lost his girl. I knew it wasn’t going to go good when the challenger just stood in the beginning and let him take those free shots without flinching.

    • @ninjapickles244
      @ninjapickles244 3 года назад +18

      Poor small guy. I hope he’s living his life as a he deserves

    • @amd1273
      @amd1273 3 года назад +45

      Apparently that was not his girl.

    • @randompheidoleminor3011
      @randompheidoleminor3011 3 года назад +24

      Read the description
      That ain't his girl

    • @fishfossils8858
      @fishfossils8858 3 года назад +7

      Lost his girl and got part of his nose ripped off. Rough day.

    • @MOJAHED-XAN
      @MOJAHED-XAN 3 года назад

      @r33mote
      Rip
      Half pp

  • @Seankman
    @Seankman 2 месяца назад +4

    An aggressive diarrhoea sound effect these elephant seals have

  • @Andro_el_de_memes
    @Andro_el_de_memes 3 года назад +1446

    Nobody:
    Godzilla at the end of every fight:
    5:09
    (I didnt expect to get to many likes lol)
    (Edit 2: please, i am a triple graduated in spanish comedy i didn't want to hurt anybody feelings, crystal generation)

    • @dripkingwavelord987
      @dripkingwavelord987 3 года назад +19

      Didn't Godzilla defeat Kong twice?
      And the MUTOs and Ghidorah before that?

    • @lemongod854
      @lemongod854 3 года назад +118

      @@dripkingwavelord987 he means the way that godzilla always goes back in the ocean after every fight

    • @sisd888
      @sisd888 3 года назад +1

      L not funny

    • @lepotato135
      @lepotato135 3 года назад +22

      @@sisd888 It was objectively funny. That is a fact. I don't have any sources, but it's a totally true fact that that comment was funny.
      Every other opinion is incorrect.
      Objectively. It's undebatable.

    • @eliottdeletraz97
      @eliottdeletraz97 3 года назад +1

      This look so ridiculous

  • @azryxthefolf6331
    @azryxthefolf6331 3 года назад +331

    "Let's take this outside mate."
    "We are outside."
    (I think that's the line from Happy Feet 2, Idk I just remember that scene when I first watched it.)

  • @JeffBezosOfficial
    @JeffBezosOfficial 3 года назад +598

    *Angel:* Alright god, we need a new sound for Seals to make. Any ideas?
    *God:* Okay, this is gonna be hilarious, hear me out.

  • @Satanna.avemaria
    @Satanna.avemaria 9 месяцев назад +2

    I am amazed this is all on camera. wow! It’s a whole movie ❤️ but I couldn’t hold the laughter in with the noises 😂😂😂😩

  • @lucasyates1893
    @lucasyates1893 3 года назад +240

    This is the best elephant seal fight I've ever seen.
    I've been obsessed with elephant seals for a bit now, and it isn't easy to determine what the critical moment of a fight is for them, but I think this captures one of those moments so well.

    • @TristanBiological
      @TristanBiological  3 года назад +43

      Thank you! Oh man, they're just the best. They're much more reluctant to fight than I expected, with lots more posturing than actual combat. But when they thrown down, it's heroic!

    • @ilyavasiliev538
      @ilyavasiliev538 3 года назад +5

      @@TristanBiological By the way on the whole youtube this record is the best fighting video i have ever seen.Thank you for the montage.

    • @peterlustig8021
      @peterlustig8021 3 года назад +3

      2:58
      ripping the nose apart is the critical moment
      attacking one of the most sensitive body parts which they also use for mating rituals is a win

    • @tommybohland3051
      @tommybohland3051 3 года назад +1

      Honestly most (not all) animals are actually very reluctant to fight it's just a survival mechanism.

    • @tehrik0020
      @tehrik0020 3 года назад

      @@tommybohland3051 Not really, some will throw down regardless of the situation, especially if they are REALLY territorial.

  • @Crackdalf
    @Crackdalf 3 года назад +372

    The seal on the right has way more scars on his body, I'd wager he's quite an experienced fighter.

    • @bartdegryse9345
      @bartdegryse9345 3 года назад +28

      like the quote i've read once, beware of an old man with the profession were men die young. something in that line,?

    • @Robert_D_Mercer
      @Robert_D_Mercer 3 года назад +27

      @@bartdegryse9345 I clicked this video for a fight, not wisdom.

    • @bartdegryse9345
      @bartdegryse9345 3 года назад +13

      @@Robert_D_Mercer lmao 🙈🤡

    • @imyourmaster77
      @imyourmaster77 3 года назад +5

      And he was bigger.

    • @silverecho1201
      @silverecho1201 3 года назад +28

      @@imyourmaster77 The fat one is normally the one that runs a harem on all the females. The small ones sneak in and try to impregnate the females leading to fights like this

  • @poison3x
    @poison3x 3 года назад +331

    He was like: " Come with me girl! You know I got a bigger toilet ;) "

  • @pavlo5551
    @pavlo5551 10 месяцев назад +3

    The sound they make is something that you can naturally encounter at home

  • @eddsalad1461
    @eddsalad1461 3 года назад +822

    Only real ones cheered for the smaller one, he was already in action until that bigger hater arrived.

    • @chachi9126
      @chachi9126 3 года назад +117

      Haha bro immediately went from fucking to fighting in less than 5 seconds

    • @m.d.sharpe8892
      @m.d.sharpe8892 3 года назад +35

      Hell nah, dude got caught lacking

    • @randompheidoleminor3011
      @randompheidoleminor3011 3 года назад +5

      Read the description lol

    • @IAmFizz
      @IAmFizz 3 года назад +5

      Hy I had money on his scary ass but he ran off🤦🏾‍♂️ he ran I said “get back here and beat. His. Ass! Stop running!?”😂😂😂

    • @mikehunt9632
      @mikehunt9632 3 года назад

      Cripple Fight!

  • @edwardelric880
    @edwardelric880 3 года назад +707

    I love how the big one tanks like 3 or 4 bites in a row and then sends the smaller one reeling with a single bite lol

    • @Rayedrgn02
      @Rayedrgn02 3 года назад +36

      That scar tissue tho

    • @ayemaeyalit3354
      @ayemaeyalit3354 3 года назад +17

      A literal alley fight

    • @sadsackkvisling9694
      @sadsackkvisling9694 3 года назад +3

      @@Rayedrgn02 One reason I can't have tats

    • @Rayedrgn02
      @Rayedrgn02 3 года назад

      @@sadsackkvisling9694 That must be some insane scar tissue. What happened?

    • @sadsackkvisling9694
      @sadsackkvisling9694 3 года назад +5

      @@Rayedrgn02 Couple knife fights, bareknuckling, working with old rusty barrels, etc. Nothing special.

  • @Kalossupremacy3356
    @Kalossupremacy3356 3 года назад +582

    The fact they can just shrug off those bites

    • @fawnieee
      @fawnieee 3 года назад +48

      Bruh did you see the on the lefts nose ;( a chunk taken completely out of it.

    • @mrj.kottari8453
      @mrj.kottari8453 3 года назад +54

      Their skin is extra durable and there's thick layer of blubber under it. They rarely get fatal wounds or even ones that lead to worse infection etc.

    • @glvine3355
      @glvine3355 3 года назад +23

      I’m pretty sure their skin and blubber is around 6-8in.

    • @THIRTEENTH13TH
      @THIRTEENTH13TH 3 года назад +17

      @@fawnieee why sad face they dont care theyre fucking tanks

    • @swlk9996
      @swlk9996 3 года назад +15

      They have inches and inches of layers of fat. Fat has nearly no blood vessels, so it’s not vital, and is more like a kevlar vest in nature. And just look at the size of their teeth compared to their body. The teeth are tiny. They would need houuuuurs to penetrate the fat layers and inflict a mortal wound.
      They have no arms to punch, no legs to kick or move... all they have are those tiny teeth lol, that’s why they fight for houuuuurs without anyone of them getting injured.
      Imagine 2 humans of that size fighting, the fight would be over after 10 mins, because we have arms, Legs, movement, and our teeth would probably be even bigger than theirs if our bodies were enlarged to their size.

  • @LEWIS_sanders_9
    @LEWIS_sanders_9 Месяц назад +3

    Imagine being the first human to see this, this is fucking eldrich

    • @SyggTheBeggarking
      @SyggTheBeggarking Месяц назад +1

      Giant squishy slubbery titans charging and bellowing, and blasting out terrifying meaty roars as they raise up and wrestle furiously, slashing with their jagged tusks at their leathery blubber armored arteries, crushing and impaling everything that can't get away with their reeking distended enormous bonaires... Eldritch and horrific indeed! Beware of the Sea Bulls aka The Snootbeasts aka The Beachtyrants

  • @matias5817
    @matias5817 3 года назад +654

    "Discord moderators battle for the right to mate"

    • @kloa4219
      @kloa4219 3 года назад +11

      @Mason Murchison and troons

    • @miguelsandigo1755
      @miguelsandigo1755 3 года назад +55

      When a 13 year old joins the board

    • @bry756
      @bry756 3 года назад +5

      Right sure ...but guarantee? Dubious

    • @SnarkyMalarkey
      @SnarkyMalarkey 3 года назад +51

      i think its insulting that you would compare these badass creatures with discord mods

    • @trillionairedan9052
      @trillionairedan9052 3 года назад

      @Mason Murchison and they can't fight for shit🤣

  • @jonb2911
    @jonb2911 3 года назад +531

    The biggest lesson I learned in my childhood was. The moment an opponent has the High Ground, It’s already over. I knew who would win the moment they squared up. *Star Wars*

    • @islamispeace333
      @islamispeace333 3 года назад +29

      I learned this through StarWars. "Don't do it Anakin, I have the high ground"

    • @jonb2911
      @jonb2911 3 года назад +7

      Yeah that’s what I was Referencing too

    • @Ohpeaches87
      @Ohpeaches87 3 года назад +8

      This is why i always bring chairs to fights.

    • @Friendly_G
      @Friendly_G 3 года назад +5

      And is taller than you. I think that's a good observation. Never fight a guy taller than you.

    • @filipelimartins
      @filipelimartins 3 года назад +3

      @@Friendly_G height isn't that important.

  • @vivahernando1
    @vivahernando1 3 года назад +265

    The smaller guy really took the action to the big guy .... this was legit awesome

    • @Moslinov
      @Moslinov 3 года назад +20

      Ngl he had heart

    • @oscarguijosa7881
      @oscarguijosa7881 3 года назад +1

      Dude almost got his nose ripped in half

  • @whynotcaptaincrunch
    @whynotcaptaincrunch 10 месяцев назад +5

    It's interesting how ritualized the combat is. The big one tore up the smaller one's nose pretty good, but other than that their fight seemed way more about display than actually trying to injure each other.

  • @RyujinRoninReach
    @RyujinRoninReach 3 года назад +681

    If you look closely at the scars and bite marks they’ve been fighting for a while, not just each other but they’ve fought others throughout their lives for a long time

    • @Blastanker
      @Blastanker 3 года назад +69

      The life of an elephant seal is that of Sparta

    • @firetarrasque4667
      @firetarrasque4667 3 года назад +9

      @@Blastanker Do not compare Elephant Seals to the goddamn Spartans
      Elephants Seals would never keep slaves, and if they did, they would not be afraid of them.

    • @brentrebrab
      @brentrebrab 3 года назад +58

      @@firetarrasque4667 my mans he was trying to compare their living conditions not morals😆

    • @HiiImChris
      @HiiImChris 3 года назад +25

      @@firetarrasque4667 are u black lmao, i don't see how anyone could possibly bring up slaves on a fucking video about seals. L O L

    • @firetarrasque4667
      @firetarrasque4667 3 года назад

      @@brentrebrab Yes, and the Spartans were a city-state of paranoid baby men terrified that their slaves were going to rise up and kill them all.

  • @OJanimations08
    @OJanimations08 3 года назад +194

    “Honey are you in the restroom?”
    “I’m not in the restroom”
    “What?”
    “Look outside.”
    “…oh.”

  • @jamez2022
    @jamez2022 3 года назад +189

    Me: has violent diarrhea*
    Elephant seal: "I'm fine how are you?"

  • @zinnsoldat731
    @zinnsoldat731 Год назад +16

    5:09 : Me on my way to the refrigerator

  • @diaryofagoat-lass1023
    @diaryofagoat-lass1023 3 года назад +234

    In all creation, no animal makes a more insane, non animal sound than these behemoths...

    • @Talonflamez
      @Talonflamez 3 года назад +15

      if there was a top five non animal sounding animal, these beasts would definitely make first place, along with elk and bellbirds.

    • @Grimpus1
      @Grimpus1 3 года назад +6

      @@Talonflamez Try foxes screaming thats crazy too

    • @adwans1491
      @adwans1491 3 года назад +7

      Wdym Sounds like wet farts

    • @akaviral5476
      @akaviral5476 3 года назад +4

      Try me after a lil Taco Bell and you'll be saying there's uno mas sound in nature making this noise

    • @FumanyuX
      @FumanyuX 3 года назад +1

      Tf you talking bout they sound like pooping

  • @GLizaerd
    @GLizaerd 3 года назад +539

    When you: Want to be an aggresive mammal that everyone scared.
    But god said: *Diarrhea noises*

    • @lanicalipari-jones6551
      @lanicalipari-jones6551 3 года назад +5

      This didn't get enough likes...

    • @theearth3001
      @theearth3001 3 года назад +3

      3am after eating taco bell

    • @kyle18934
      @kyle18934 3 года назад +6

      @@theearth3001 imagine eating taco bell and being on the toilet... then one of these guys attacks because you were making the mating calls

    • @outofcontextdude130
      @outofcontextdude130 3 года назад

      Hmm, I’m feel-in, happy today
      Edit: more pissed

    • @MAGNAVOXish
      @MAGNAVOXish 3 года назад

      Underrated comment 😂

  • @prettypegacornunisus2990
    @prettypegacornunisus2990 3 года назад +107

    Those bites look terrifying don’t wanna get caught in that , it’s over for you... they look almost as big as the house

  • @geckogal1024
    @geckogal1024 25 дней назад +1

    could you imagine getting it on with your girl and then some other dude comes up to you and asks to take over while you’re literally mid stroke

  • @viking197
    @viking197 3 года назад +285

    God: so what noise should the elephant seal make?
    Chipotle Sauce: yes

  • @Web-Slinger42
    @Web-Slinger42 3 года назад +606

    Seal 1: "All women are queens"
    Seal 2: "If she breathes she's a thot"

  • @danielholmqvist2713
    @danielholmqvist2713 3 года назад +141

    1:10 when they crawl down like that I just imagine a four legged mammal trapped in a seal costume trying to walking normally

  • @Len124
    @Len124 11 месяцев назад +3

    The female: "Shucks fellas, don't fight over little ol' me!" Takes out a bag of popcorn.

  • @alejandroespinoza5207
    @alejandroespinoza5207 3 года назад +294

    “Do you wanna play BattleShits?” Is all that comes to mind when hearing them intimidation roars

  • @jackashmore
    @jackashmore 3 года назад +358

    Angel: yo these guys are kinda bad ass, should we do something to make them look less scary? I mean seals are suppose to be kinda cute
    God: put a whoopie cushion for the nose and make them sound like a Taco Bell bathroom

    • @gnypp45
      @gnypp45 3 года назад +4

      💀💀💀🤣🤣🤣

    • @LordKrhiyos
      @LordKrhiyos 3 года назад +17

      This sounds like a perfect family guy cutaway

  • @SumSock41
    @SumSock41 3 года назад +164

    i was cheereing for the smallest one, his face got severaly injured and the big guy had the terrain advantage being the top, if you're a seal make sure you mate at the top of terrain so they attack you from climbing up hill

    • @InfernalLeo777
      @InfernalLeo777 3 года назад +75

      Thanks, i usually transform into a seal.

    • @potats1770
      @potats1770 3 года назад +37

      the big seal was the original females partner, in the whole video in the link in the description, the female was trying to leave but the small male waited for her at the docks and mated with the female by force

    • @potats1770
      @potats1770 3 года назад +12

      @Martha Speaks its just nature doing weird things

    • @potats1770
      @potats1770 3 года назад +1

      @@Jr-mj3bw why are you so angry at them

    • @meekgreek9922
      @meekgreek9922 3 года назад +2

      If only we could translate that into elephant seal grunts. It would be like a PSA for elephant seals.

  • @MorganTalksbeauty
    @MorganTalksbeauty Год назад +6

    I genuinely was invested in this fight and was really rooting for the smaller one.