@@combatboots3517 I wonder why she doesn't comment to any of these videos. Well that's not true I know exactly why, it would be a shitshow but id love it.
POV: Sam has captured you and handcuffed you to a ceiling water pipe in his basement and won't stop telling you about his life as you desperately try to signal the man mowing his lawn through the window to call the police
I usually start on the weird and end on the normal, that way when I wake up in the morning I can smile knowing I busted my nut to silent missionary under the blankets
We do know her... She was in the soylent video, the mail time where he assaulted her with nerf guns and the pokemon go video and possibly many more i dont remember.
Hey Sam, I highly doubt you'll read this but when you were talking about the Salvation Army it reminded me of a story my Great-Grandpa wrote down in a journal he kept during WW2. He was a Marine Infantryman in the Pacific and was involved in taking a couple islands. I can't remember exactly which island it was he was returning from but they had been in the shit for almost 3 months. No showers, hot meals, or anything. When he got off the ship at one of the rear islands the first thing he saw was the Salvation Army and Red Cross holding out glasses of lemonade for the guys. They all snatched them up immediately and gulped down two or three each. Then they noticed the signs on the tables and how they were charging almost a weeks pay for one glass of lemonade. They couldn't lunch the ladies even though they tricked them but their CO worked out a deal where they paid for one glass. Further down the way a bit was a USO setup. They were giving out razors, shaving cream, good soap, toothbrushes and a thing of beer to each of the grunts as they came back. Naturally they were all pissed and ready to roll with that guy if he tried screwing them but they were legitimately giving the stuff out. They were all in bad moods and still very skeptical so Great-Grandpa smarted off and said he'd only be impressed if they got hula girls to dance for them. The next night they had a whole performance of them. The USO guy got into contact with someone in Hawaii and had them out the next day. They were there every step of the way for them after. He loved that organization until the day he died. If I'm not mistaken there's a book that talks about a similar situation. I believe it's With the old Breed. They were his sister battalion. Just thought that was interesting
I love how at this point Abbey is just this mythical figure that Sam tells stories about. It’s like in Charlie Brown where you never see the adults, but always hear about them.
He’s more on the liberal side. He’s definitely got some conservative views, but from everything I’ve seen, he’s like 60-40 or 70-30 in favor of liberal.
On the political compass he is most likely in the Libertarian-Left quadrant. I thought he may have been LibRight, but his bit about charities being a side effect of lacking social safety nets is a hallmark LibLeft belief
@@kraio-sfu Regardless, politics are a scam to divide the country and keep the populace distracted. They did it in Greece, they did it in Rome, and they do it in the good ol USA. So people should stop foaming at the mouth in rage about whether you like blue or red more.
Sam is like that chill and cool uncle at the family reunion who just wants to hang out and talk about random stuff and doesnt stare at your crotch every second
That last bit about Hodor the bagger had me absolutely fucking rolling Especially because he never stops with the hypotheticals and analogies for the guy, it is an neverending combo punch of comedy
I saw Aqua one time while I was walking my dog... When I saw him I said "Holy shit it's Aqua!". Without breaking stride, he drew a pistol and shot my dog! As I cradled my dogs dying body Aqua looked back over his shoulder and said "Like comment and subscribe!", then he shot my dog again! I still liked, commented and subbed though. I miss my dog...
I attended one of the protests in LA. Before that, I thought the headlines saying, "protests did not cause a noticeable uptick in COVID cases" was bullshit, but after going I wouldn't be surprised if it were true. When you watch the news, you only see what the station wants you to see. When I attended I was surprised at how careful everyone was being. Every single person had a mask on. I didn't see a single person without a mask. There were also volunteers carrying large economy-sized Purell bottles, and offering it to people in the crowds. People were NOT shoulder to shoulder marching; instead, people were actually at least 5 feet away from each other. Some streets were smaller than others, so there were times we got a little bit closer, but I never touched anybody. The protests were silent... eerily quiet at moments. The only sound being footsteps against concrete, shuffled clothing. Until the police came and teargassed everyone. Then it was chaos.
I'm sitting in a operation waiting room in a hospital surrounded by groups of sad/Nervous people. And my god I'm trying my best to not laugh through this. God bless masks
man i love these podcasts. you have such a refreshing take on stuff its nice to hear someone who isnt saying the same shit ive heard 10 times. finally someone else whos mentioning how these riots are affecting the pandemic. i mentioned it and people treated me like i was an idiot
my internet got broke af when lockdown happened/ SAM get visible its a phone service with unlimited tethering for 40bucks a month no contract, it gives you internet strong enough to stream and you can take it anywhere the only catch is you can only tether to one device at a time
Tsukiko Tsutsukakushi that part was cringe to me. Like they stole soup and rice, those people were probably poor and hungry and not trying to be greedy just trying to feed their kids.
Seriously with regards to Spectrum. Completely intermittent connection, wildly inconsistent speeds, shit basically disconnects entirely between 2300 to 0600.
@@sgfhhui8414 try having Hughsnet... We live in a rural spot in NorCal and they're the ONLY game in town. Utter. Garbage. We pay out the ASS for 100 mbps up/down we're lucky to pull 1mbps down at 3:30 am and half that during the day. Absolute hell cuz I work from home. They're actually 95% of why I'm moving. Can't work while anyone else does ANYTHING online... I say we all get together and convince BLM to burn THEM down!!!... After the next Arby's, of course.
Yes sam people have to go back to work because recessions are worse then being sick for a week keep old people and immune deficient people isolated but everyone else is fine.
Actually these solo ones are my favourite idk why but there is something magical about listening to someone shittalk everything while falling asleep...
I already told my buddy: "Yes, you guys go and plunder trainers/shoes and Flatscreen TVs. But before, would you mind pointing the way to the next car dealership, please?"
sam: complains about cancel culture also sam: cancels some comcast guy, a mentally handicapped grocery bagger, blm charities, his neighbors, his brother, his wife and his daughter in less than an hour. no this was fun and i know you're afraid to bring her on because the things you have to say will cause her to put you in a head lock and noogie you so hard it retracts your hairline another 3 inches but you should bring abby on if not for the entertainment of her being wildly uncomfortable and fully establishing you as a power bottom but just to make her answer for her yogurt crimes
i never understod the concept of having baggers in a grocery store... someone explain it please? arent people expected to bag their shit fast enough by them self or what is it?
My house burnt down when i was like 8. Red cross put us in a hotel for a year while the house was rebuilt. They also gave me a little stuffed bear. Still have it.
Sams daughter is a lootgoblin, who would have guessed.
Already displaying Rat tendencies.
Lol
Took a rare pacifier, worst teammate ever
clawzx but the best rat
@@HubbaBubba768 naw shes rat ++ bc of overhearing sam n them play tarkov
Petition to have Abby come on one of these with you
I definitely petite to this !
I concur
get scabs on
Yes get scabs!!!!
Your fans hate you and this is the proof.
the solo podcasts are just sam's excuse to practice his standup routine
honestly
Atleast he’s funny tho
I like them more than the others
lol if you could just pause a standup show and go make chicken sam would be a great standup comedian
honestly wouldn't be surprised if i see him doing standup in the next couple years.
The man, the myth, the legend bashing his wife on podcast because he's too afraid of direct retaliation.
Found Abbys RUclips account.
@@combatboots3517 I wonder why she doesn't comment to any of these videos.
Well that's not true I know exactly why, it would be a shitshow but id love it.
This shows how far the rabbithole of rat's life this man has fallen...he's beyond saving at this point.
The podcast is like his hidden journal tucked under the mattress; DAY:643 my wife is still upset
@@combatboots3517 tell
POV: Sam has captured you and handcuffed you to a ceiling water pipe in his basement and won't stop telling you about his life as you desperately try to signal the man mowing his lawn through the window to call the police
Too bad for you that the thing mowing his lawn is a soulless roomba
I would whack off to that at 3am.
Nice pfp
This is the best comment ive ever seen thank you so much
no joke, we just got the most sincere affectionate statements ever said by general sam lol
Weirdly refreshing to hear from the rat-king himself...
Yeah it warmed my heart to hear him say that him and Aqua could rob Walmart
Sam skirts the line between convincing me he has a horrible relationship or his relationship is doing good.
Solo sam reminds me of Bill Burr's podcast.
The greatest compliment he’s ever received
Completely agree
Grandma dependapotomus
General Sam: The Bill Burr Of RUclips Gaming
Solo Sam podcasts are the best ones
One day. I hope you and AquaFPS can beat up the poor and homeless together.
But alas, that's his hobby. Not yours.
Irregularr while wearing crocs
They usually piss on him afterwards to mark him as their territory, but as you said that's Aqua's little hobby not Sams
I imagine that having Sam as a neighbor would be like having Gru from despicable me as a neighbor
I can see that 😂
Sam :" ok come in Kids, pick up the orange "
2min later
Sam " they stole my last orange !"
Peter Griffin and his “What Really Grinds My Gears” segment on the local news
“And I decided to make a joke.” see and that’s where you went wrong.
Why the fuck did he say that it sounds so awkward
@@leatherfart1822 just joking about his grandma's grave
@@then35t18 It was funny, the family were just too uptight because of the nature of the joke.
Well apparently I get to the weird porn way earlier than everyone else.
Yea same here
I usually start on the weird and end on the normal, that way when I wake up in the morning I can smile knowing I busted my nut to silent missionary under the blankets
@@vipture. HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH
@@vipture. this comment is pure gold
I related to Sam and that weird porn thing way too much
"I don't wanna be horny anymore, I just wanna be happy."
Nofap bruthr
It’s time the break the conditioning!!!!
I've seen this comment under a lot of pornhub videos lately
@@robertwelch2843 It's more than a comment, it's the truth about the plight of males.
@@unyielding.entertainment very true, some handle it better than others
13:10 Now I'm picturing Sam's fence like some kind of 4 meters tall solid concrete wall, like the one Bin Laden had.
We need to have one with his wife on here
Nah it's better with her existing as a faceless idea.
@@SweetandFitting agreed, if we got to know her we couldn't blindly hate her
@@vipture. and thats exactly what he wants lol
@@lazerapter8722 that's what I want
We do know her... She was in the soylent video, the mail time where he assaulted her with nerf guns and the pokemon go video and possibly many more i dont remember.
I know every morning when sam brushes his teeth, he looks himself right in the eyes and gives himself a little smile and a god damn wink
If you don't do the same thing, you're shorting yourself
One day these children will find out that they live next to and interacted with the famous General Sam
And got shit on in a podcast 🤣
"Infamous"
I swear The Hunt anecdote has me thinking after all these months. One day Sam too will have to face these demons.
Hey Sam, I highly doubt you'll read this but when you were talking about the Salvation Army it reminded me of a story my Great-Grandpa wrote down in a journal he kept during WW2. He was a Marine Infantryman in the Pacific and was involved in taking a couple islands. I can't remember exactly which island it was he was returning from but they had been in the shit for almost 3 months. No showers, hot meals, or anything. When he got off the ship at one of the rear islands the first thing he saw was the Salvation Army and Red Cross holding out glasses of lemonade for the guys. They all snatched them up immediately and gulped down two or three each. Then they noticed the signs on the tables and how they were charging almost a weeks pay for one glass of lemonade. They couldn't lunch the ladies even though they tricked them but their CO worked out a deal where they paid for one glass. Further down the way a bit was a USO setup. They were giving out razors, shaving cream, good soap, toothbrushes and a thing of beer to each of the grunts as they came back. Naturally they were all pissed and ready to roll with that guy if he tried screwing them but they were legitimately giving the stuff out. They were all in bad moods and still very skeptical so Great-Grandpa smarted off and said he'd only be impressed if they got hula girls to dance for them. The next night they had a whole performance of them. The USO guy got into contact with someone in Hawaii and had them out the next day. They were there every step of the way for them after. He loved that organization until the day he died. If I'm not mistaken there's a book that talks about a similar situation. I believe it's With the old Breed. They were his sister battalion. Just thought that was interesting
I love how at this point Abbey is just this mythical figure that Sam tells stories about. It’s like in Charlie Brown where you never see the adults, but always hear about them.
Abby has been in a few videos
I've been watching for years and I can't tell if he's liberal or conservative. he's views are just funny and morally questionable and I love it
He’s more on the liberal side. He’s definitely got some conservative views, but from everything I’ve seen, he’s like 60-40 or 70-30 in favor of liberal.
On the political compass he is most likely in the Libertarian-Left quadrant. I thought he may have been LibRight, but his bit about charities being a side effect of lacking social safety nets is a hallmark LibLeft belief
@@kraio-sfu Regardless, politics are a scam to divide the country and keep the populace distracted. They did it in Greece, they did it in Rome, and they do it in the good ol USA.
So people should stop foaming at the mouth in rage about whether you like blue or red more.
Does it matter?
you are speaking as though he either a: votes or b: gives a shit.
majority of americans are option c: neither of the above
I like the single podcasts 100x more than the others tbh this is hilarious
I like when Sam talk about how he makes himself the outcast at family dinners
35:20 Sam notices how low his hunger bar is
8000$ for a fence. Bruh you got shafted.
hes a stupid townie. what do you expect.
really? what kind of fence did he use?
I doubt he built it so you have to account for lumber and labor
@@nickdickson4182 bruh he said he got the materials.. it was 8 grand for just the labor lmaooooo, sam, you clown
lmaoo unless hes got some magnificent yard we dont know about, but im assuming less than half an acre. he got shafted
Your solo podcasts are top tier. I was tearing up laughing - "lets go ransack the campells soup department"
You should get sseth on here
hey hey now that is a great idea
Hell yeah dude
Yes
PLEASE
He probably genocide some minorities in one 3rd World country right now, i dont think he has time to do podcast things.
Sam is like that chill and cool uncle at the family reunion who just wants to hang out and talk about random stuff and doesnt stare at your crotch every second
Does your family do that? I would be careful. Some uncles are into nephews.
So the opposite of AquaFPS?
Sam's Storytime evolved into something much better
"Cut to when I have the clacker"
*gets up slowly and begrudgingly like a grandpa*
That last bit about Hodor the bagger had me absolutely fucking rolling
Especially because he never stops with the hypotheticals and analogies for the guy, it is an neverending combo punch of comedy
When are we gonna get a podcast with Sam's editor?
It'll be on PornHub, don't miss it
@@ChadConnor are you for real
Yeah he is on one of his patron podcasts he said so
Put a 1 in chat if you want Sam to interview Scabs (Abby) on the podcast.
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This is the one podcast that I can actually watch from front to back without losing interest. Good work daddy Samuel
The solo casts are my favorite
On top of the false allegations the ten year old might be lookin around and find the fabled fleshlight
reason #46,793 to never let a kid in your house
In the middle of the day, people are walking outside in the front yard like zombies.
I’m looking out side and I can see them . Lmao i
I feel like sams neighbor is gonna find this one and its gonna cause some problems
most kids go through a "mine!" phase around 2 years old.
She’s 19.
@@rockydocky7541 OMG IM DED XD
this podcast is so much more personal then I have ever seen on your main channel or this channel. Thanks for that.
I love forehead fables.
Me and my homies all love forehead fables.
Me and the boys stay listening to forehead fables in the car
I saw Aqua one time while I was walking my dog... When I saw him I said "Holy shit it's Aqua!". Without breaking stride, he drew a pistol and shot my dog! As I cradled my dogs dying body Aqua looked back over his shoulder and said "Like comment and subscribe!", then he shot my dog again! I still liked, commented and subbed though. I miss my dog...
The 'mine' phase is generally a normal part of growth and development
Yess Daddy Sam. Need this is my morning
You should do a financial podcast episode where you screw around w legit investors
I'm digging these frequent releases. Keep 'em coming!
I attended one of the protests in LA. Before that, I thought the headlines saying, "protests did not cause a noticeable uptick in COVID cases" was bullshit, but after going I wouldn't be surprised if it were true. When you watch the news, you only see what the station wants you to see. When I attended I was surprised at how careful everyone was being. Every single person had a mask on. I didn't see a single person without a mask. There were also volunteers carrying large economy-sized Purell bottles, and offering it to people in the crowds. People were NOT shoulder to shoulder marching; instead, people were actually at least 5 feet away from each other. Some streets were smaller than others, so there were times we got a little bit closer, but I never touched anybody. The protests were silent... eerily quiet at moments. The only sound being footsteps against concrete, shuffled clothing. Until the police came and teargassed everyone. Then it was chaos.
I'm sitting in a operation waiting room in a hospital surrounded by groups of sad/Nervous people. And my god I'm trying my best to not laugh through this. God bless masks
dude im not even going to lie i definitely coomed a whole bunch like a lot
agreed
@@comradestalin1211 what was it like meeting Hitler good sir
Foy Compton yea I wanna know to
How did you comment 3 days ago
@@LB.99 yeah wth
I swear these podcasts are the funniest shit I've even listened to🤣🤣
man i love these podcasts. you have such a refreshing take on stuff its nice to hear someone who isnt saying the same shit ive heard 10 times. finally someone else whos mentioning how these riots are affecting the pandemic. i mentioned it and people treated me like i was an idiot
Sam, Florida's governor can't even put a mask on correctly lol
Who gives a foook
@@rockig5529 fook
RockiG There’s no doubt about, YOU’RE the governor.
@@rockig5529 why do you give a fook if he freely and willingly gives his fook?
Linus Tech Tip for Sam: get a mower roomba so you can claim your yard unsafe for children
How is he so funny even when he’s alone with no content like gameplay in front of him to talk about, it’s crazy
Feldûsh Giggles dudes been killing it since 8 grade.
I've never watched one of your full podcasts before this one. It was really funny.
Gotta love some solo sam. Feels like I'm hearing a stand-up routine.
Just take your kids toys and yell “MY TOY” then punt that kid and show your are the alpha male
That's sounds more like something aqua would do
@@ruzt-e431 that's Aquas alt account for spreading evil.
Its weird, I'm in South Africa and my wifi went out yesterday too
my internet got broke af when lockdown happened/ SAM get visible its a phone service with unlimited tethering for 40bucks a month no contract, it gives you internet strong enough to stream and you can take it anywhere the only catch is you can only tether to one device at a time
Good vid Sam, I really like the solo one's. You should make more family videos like back in the day.
This is one of the most wholesome things I’ve ever seen 😂
Why cant i downvote on this website
Call's his wife out on dishes during a podcast absolute chad
Yeah man, as long she doesn’t see it.
i never knew how good this podcast was!!
It's so weird to come back and watch these old podcast episodes.
35:00 What Sam actually wants to say is that instead of stealing rice he would steal every Diet Coke Can in the store.
Main reason people only stole $100,000 of stuff is because of bad loot spawns. No ledex, no labs cards, etc.
Tsukiko Tsutsukakushi that part was cringe to me. Like they stole soup and rice, those people were probably poor and hungry and not trying to be greedy just trying to feed their kids.
These solo podcasts give me life
sam literally using rat plans to ransack a wallmart like it's the tarkov interchange XD
I'm so sick of Comcast too. My internet keeps dropping every few hours.
You think Comcast is bad I rather have Comcast then the piece of shit charter spectrum
Seriously with regards to Spectrum. Completely intermittent connection, wildly inconsistent speeds, shit basically disconnects entirely between 2300 to 0600.
@@wafflepoet5437 yea I pay $100+ for 100up and 100 down but some how get only FUCKIN 5UP AND 1.2 KB DOWN WTF
@@wafflepoet5437 I would love to have Comcast I would move states for better Internet preferably fiber internet
@@sgfhhui8414 try having Hughsnet... We live in a rural spot in NorCal and they're the ONLY game in town. Utter. Garbage. We pay out the ASS for 100 mbps up/down we're lucky to pull 1mbps down at 3:30 am and half that during the day. Absolute hell cuz I work from home. They're actually 95% of why I'm moving. Can't work while anyone else does ANYTHING online... I say we all get together and convince BLM to burn THEM down!!!... After the next Arby's, of course.
Yes sam people have to go back to work because recessions are worse then being sick for a week keep old people and immune deficient people isolated but everyone else is fine.
I really enjoyed the solo podcast, let me use rant and ramble really enjoyable
Actually these solo ones are my favourite idk why but there is something magical about listening to someone shittalk everything while falling asleep...
Can we get Shammy on here? I feel like the two guys would have a wonderful conversation lmao.
That would be sick. Especially now that he's back making content
Telling you how charity is a scam, but still paid 8000$ for some guy to build a fence.
"that's stolen valour if I've ever seen it" I am literally crying 🤣🤣🤣
I already told my buddy: "Yes, you guys go and plunder trainers/shoes and Flatscreen TVs. But before, would you mind pointing the way to the next car dealership, please?"
omg I'm just done watching ur stream highlights love u 🥵🥵🥵✌️✌️✌️👊😌👊👊😌👊😌😌😭😵😭😵😩😩🥵👊😍
I just realized how HUGE his forehead is like I could land multiple airplanes on that.
Stalltt thank you for the segmented podcast titles it’s quality
Sam is that one old guy of the neighborhood all the kids fuck with because he's so adamant to keep them out.
being alone screaming at a camera is respectful when it makes you 7k a month!
sam: complains about cancel culture
also sam: cancels some comcast guy, a mentally handicapped grocery bagger, blm charities, his neighbors, his brother, his wife and his daughter in less than an hour.
no this was fun and i know you're afraid to bring her on because the things you have to say will cause her to put you in a head lock and noogie you so hard it retracts your hairline another 3 inches but you should bring abby on if not for the entertainment of her being wildly uncomfortable and fully establishing you as a power bottom but just to make her answer for her yogurt crimes
Dare I say these solo episodes are the best episodes
I love these solo Sam podcasts I wish he did more of these
That’s neat how you made segments. That’s cool you can do that now
Sam described my quarantine life in one introduction 😂😭
Fun fact i use that exact Tupperware container to hold my chopped and unchopped bud great container
My grandmother took my to my oral surgery(cant drive home after surgery on meds) I put this on for the drive and she thought it was hilarious
Sam you are a gem in this stupid world. Thank you for being you. 74 down votes?? Those are Karen’s
i never understod the concept of having baggers in a grocery store... someone explain it please? arent people expected to bag their shit fast enough by them self or what is it?
Your thumbnail has the WP 👌 must be the reason YT recommend this video to me. Or maybe since I've been subbed since the start. Either way 👌
Hearing Sam come back to the rage against the Comcast guy was the highlight of my day.
honestly i dig the solo's more then the regular ones, unless its someone like soup where you guys are practically mentally stroking each other off
My house burnt down when i was like 8. Red cross put us in a hotel for a year while the house was rebuilt. They also gave me a little stuffed bear. Still have it.
For a whole minute I sat at my desk thinking the light of Sam's life was a small poop his wife made. Forgot the had a kid.
Its a breath of fresh air hearing Sams podcasts. Hes like a millenial bill bur. Its perfect.
Please keep making more of these I can not get enough!
"Evidence for a spousal murder trial" I love Staltt's segment names.
Sublime podcast🤣The part about hodor is to good🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂
Man that awkward dinner story was one of the funniest things I have ever heard