How To Be A Good Listener | Jamila Musayeva

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  • Опубликовано: 27 сен 2024

Комментарии • 729

  • @JamilaMusayeva
    @JamilaMusayeva  Месяц назад

    Buy my books: jamilamusayeva.com/order-books
    Get my courses with certificates:jamilamusayeva.com/courses
    Join my Patreon Club: www.patreon.com/jamilamusayeva
    Follow me on Instagram: instagram.com/jamila_musayeva

  • @zaraamelia9684
    @zaraamelia9684 3 года назад +615

    Non-verbal
    1. Smile
    2. Eye contact
    3. Open body posture (lean in, put body closer, no crossing hands)
    4. Nodding
    5. Mirroring
    Verbal
    1. Non-reinforcement words (eg yes, I hear you)
    2. Question (Don't intrude, but clarify. Ask a follow-up question)
    3. Reflection (repeating or paraphrasing)
    4. Clarify (summarize)
    5. Listen to the tone of the voice

  • @user-kp7gw4vs6f
    @user-kp7gw4vs6f 3 года назад +184

    How to answer awkward questions elegantly... please!
    And also how to answer the compliment: you are beautiful
    It's always so embarrassing

    • @arletbode4847
      @arletbode4847 3 года назад +10

      To “you are beautiful” I would say thank you, that’s so kind.

    • @thekingsdaughter4233
      @thekingsdaughter4233 3 года назад +4

      Seconding Arlet Bode. Smile, say thank you (to underline, I would perhaps briefly switch into the more "feminine" postures from the posture and deportment videos on this channel - if appropriate, then switch back), and get on with the situation at hand. :-)
      Just tbought that in tis day and age, unfortunately, in certain situations, a comment like that would fling me in full panic mode (talking a walk in the park, not many other people nearby...) * sigh *

    • @JamilaMusayeva
      @JamilaMusayeva  3 года назад +32

      Accept it with grace 😊

    • @user-kp7gw4vs6f
      @user-kp7gw4vs6f 3 года назад +2

      @@JamilaMusayeva I do not want to look proud or Arrogant ..
      Should I show enthusiasm for the compliment?

    • @Su-mz5zh
      @Su-mz5zh 3 года назад +1

      @@arletbode4847 I could never give such an answer if this would come from someone I don't have a romantic relationship with. But if someone would tell me, you are smart, I would exactly say this. Some comments don't need answers...

  • @riyachandavale2599
    @riyachandavale2599 3 года назад +285

    Introverts be like: we already boss in this 😎

    • @girlhappy6442
      @girlhappy6442 3 года назад +5

      Yes me 😂

    • @BADBOY-ow4wc
      @BADBOY-ow4wc 3 года назад +4

      the one of most funniest comment 😂😂

    • @riddhipasricha934
      @riddhipasricha934 2 года назад

      Yes I am

    • @kiranpatel6521
      @kiranpatel6521 Год назад

      Not really I'm sort of introvert when tired or hungover,still CBA to listen to people's woes and rubbish stoies. Bored me!

  • @ipeace6145
    @ipeace6145 3 года назад +224

    I love your voice. I would like some tips on how to soften the voice.

    • @alessandrapc09
      @alessandrapc09 3 года назад +4

      I agreee! ❤️

    • @uhpluplum
      @uhpluplum 3 года назад +1

      I like this too!

    • @humerakhan5945
      @humerakhan5945 3 года назад +1

      Yes!

    • @thekingsdaughter4233
      @thekingsdaughter4233 3 года назад +10

      On the phone, smile a little. In person, and since I know I have a "bitchy resting face", I make a point to think of happy things, or think of a cheerful song. Does wonders, judging by the feedback I get. :-) For starters, until Jamila uploads! ;-)

    • @JamilaMusayeva
      @JamilaMusayeva  3 года назад +93

      Coming soon on speaking manner 😊 stay tuned!

  • @mayarivera6892
    @mayarivera6892 3 года назад +165

    This is such an important topic. In the West our culture really is listening to respond, instead of listening to actually hear what the other person is saying. When we leave space to listen actively, we allow the speaker's train of thought to continue and finish... and then we can respond! So important to learn this skill, especially right now....Never too late to start :) Gracias Jamila

  • @dakotalee6990
    @dakotalee6990 3 года назад +14

    As someone with social anxiety, I find that knowing rules of social etiquette can really help mitigate stress. Part of the anxiety comes from uncertainty and not knowing how to respond to certain situations, but having a set of guidelines can really help set me at ease. Thank you for your videos!

  • @cassandrachew
    @cassandrachew 3 года назад +18

    quick summary! but pls still watch the whole video to have a better understanding ☺️ thank u for this great video, you’ve helped me so much!
    non-verbal
    1. smile (when it’s appropriate)
    2. maintain eye contact but look away sometimes (*tip: look in between their eyebrows)
    3. body posture (physically bring urself closer, lean in, open body posture = no crossing ur arms)
    4. position of ur head (slant head and bring ur head closer/ rest ur head on ur hand)
    5. nod according to what they say
    6. mirroring (reflection of the person’s body posture when u r listening)
    verbal
    1. positive reinforcements (yes, right, i feel you/hear you/i know what you mean)
    2. follow up questions (has to flow)
    3. reflection (repeating what the speaker has said in your own words & what you think they must feel)
    4. clarification (open ended qns)
    5. summarisation (brief summary + open ended qns at the end)
    6. listen to the tone of the voice (not just the words)
    **people love conversations when they talk the most - wanna be a good conversationalist? be a good listener.

  • @julia9557
    @julia9557 3 года назад +25

    Please do a video on feminine fashion, styling, hairstyles and accessories :) I love your voice it's so calm and relaxing

  • @delabruna4283
    @delabruna4283 3 года назад +16

    I would definitely listen attentively to someone like you !! Very eloquent and classy

  • @francescaicaza5148
    @francescaicaza5148 3 года назад +11

    This channel is a hidden gem ❤️💎👌

  • @shekaina_wesley
    @shekaina_wesley 3 года назад +19

    I love listening to you because of your soothe calming voice , It really calms me . Thanks a lot for teaching me how to be a good listener .

  • @merlina2354
    @merlina2354 3 года назад +6

    the quality of this video is absolutely incredible!

  • @joon1728
    @joon1728 3 года назад +15

    I clicked as soon as I got the notfication. I'm so glad I found this channel!! I feel so good about myself these days. Thank you so much!

    • @JamilaMusayeva
      @JamilaMusayeva  3 года назад +1

      Thank you 🙏🏻 happy to hear that!

  • @NEET-br1bl
    @NEET-br1bl Год назад +2

    Thank you Jamila for actually providing good quality content for free.

  • @divanshi9465
    @divanshi9465 3 года назад +27

    second yay love you so much . i have noticed such a good chnage in myself after following you

    • @CelineRockIt
      @CelineRockIt 3 года назад +2

      I definitely see where you are coming from. Watching her makes you want to be a better person.

    • @divanshi9465
      @divanshi9465 3 года назад

      @@CelineRockIt thank you you’re saying the truth hope you are safe and happy 😃

  • @mina_hana103
    @mina_hana103 3 года назад +8

    You're a wonderful role model. Thank you 😊

    • @JamilaMusayeva
      @JamilaMusayeva  3 года назад +1

      Thank you!

    • @mina_hana103
      @mina_hana103 3 года назад +1

      @@JamilaMusayeva thank you too. The education and the right manners are the base for a good society,and so many people should follow your advice, especially if a youg girl/woman would become a real lady like you. So thank you very much. 🙏🏻💜 I'm a big fan of yours and of your work.

  • @annecastilho3923
    @annecastilho3923 3 года назад +107

    I'd love to watch a video on how to "control" your face when expressing emotions.. Sometimes I feel like people (myself included) end up making ugly faces when expressing emotions of confusion/surprise etc. How can we control our face's emotions without being too plain?

    • @JamilaMusayeva
      @JamilaMusayeva  3 года назад +22

      Noted 😊

    • @TsarOfRuss
      @TsarOfRuss 3 года назад

      Pull a poker face! its the best for any situation

    • @oliviadutta1354
      @oliviadutta1354 3 года назад +1

      I wanna know the same

    • @ishha14
      @ishha14 3 года назад +1

      @@JamilaMusayeva Yes! I would love a video on this, you always look so serene on camera. It took me until I was in University in the US to hear that my "thinking/processing" face was interpreted as judgemental or critical. Still working on moderating my other expressions (I'll get wrinkles early hahahaha)

    • @celinehosea
      @celinehosea 3 года назад +2

      I don't think expressing your emotions without control is bad, Anne, in fact, I think it feels more 'authentic' and can bring your closer to other people! If you feel anxious about not looking 'good', this may even be a good thing because people form friendships by vulnerability. =)

  • @martinmasvisvi3365
    @martinmasvisvi3365 3 года назад +1

    I can listen to you the all day long thank u ma'am

  • @disharixex
    @disharixex 3 года назад +3

    I love how you address both the genders in each of your videos ❤️

  • @ranalia9025
    @ranalia9025 3 года назад +2

    Even if i don't have time to watch, I'm saving your videos to come back again, you're so precious🙏😊 Greetings from Turkey🇹🇷

  • @TheDanster4
    @TheDanster4 3 года назад +3

    As someone with social anxiety, doing this is really hard but I think this would be good practice for me to do with my family so I really appreciate these tips!

    • @JamilaMusayeva
      @JamilaMusayeva  3 года назад +2

      You are welcome. It takes practice to become good at it ☺️

  • @potospotos4078
    @potospotos4078 3 года назад +29

    Hai, I am a new subscriber. Please do a video on how to speak calmly and at the same time be assertive. Thank you.❤️

  • @suryaprabhu.
    @suryaprabhu. 3 года назад +2

    Oh my goodness! So elegant,classy,calm😍 worthy of my time, definitely u deserve more subscribers 👍

  • @juliethmsaki
    @juliethmsaki 3 года назад +1

    Her voice is soooo soothing I really wanna be soft and gentle like her!!

  • @IevaKambarovaite
    @IevaKambarovaite 3 года назад +5

    Never clicked on a video faster 💜

  • @tungochuy
    @tungochuy 3 года назад +1

    hey queen you dropped this 👑

  • @leanaam.5385
    @leanaam.5385 9 месяцев назад

    I always come back to this video because it’s such an important skill to have. Thank you Jamila for this gem!

  • @anitamwangi2756
    @anitamwangi2756 3 года назад +1

    I love your videos, please highlight the major point in the description that explain the video content
    You have taught me a lot,thankyou

  • @ajohonly3721
    @ajohonly3721 3 года назад +1

    I’m so happy I found your channel.

  • @hooria4732
    @hooria4732 3 года назад +13

    I want a heart from you PLEASE :)

  • @ImranKhan-eg7by
    @ImranKhan-eg7by 3 года назад

    I think I can become " a good listener " by just watching your videos and listening your voice

  • @glyderglyder
    @glyderglyder 3 года назад +1

    Honestly you've inspired ..
    Thanks for the amazing advice

  • @RB-by3gi
    @RB-by3gi 3 года назад +3

    Love your content, Jamila. Thank you for uploading!

  • @Archer396
    @Archer396 3 года назад +1

    Your videos are thoroughly informative. Thanks! This comment is probably after binge watching your uploads😊

  • @gulnarasgarova4227
    @gulnarasgarova4227 3 года назад +27

    I liked it. 👍 Could you make a video about "job interview" ethics or office ethics?

    • @JamilaMusayeva
      @JamilaMusayeva  3 года назад +1

      Good idea 😉

    • @buku8627
      @buku8627 3 года назад +1

      Office ethics, I think its very important nowadays. The relationship with our boss

    • @Flourish_today
      @Flourish_today 3 года назад +3

      @@buku8627 And now that we are working from home. Zoom call ethics.

    • @merry_christmas
      @merry_christmas 3 года назад +1

      @@JamilaMusayeva And if you come around to this particular subject, please include work at home/video meeting ethics. I have a lot of difficulty translating distinctive office ethics onto a video call.

    • @fidanmammadzada495
      @fidanmammadzada495 3 года назад

      Wow,this is also what I want

  • @pratyasha798
    @pratyasha798 3 года назад +1

    I'm so glad that I found your channel, I'm liking your videos so much
    Thank you so so much❤️

  • @Anchorursoul
    @Anchorursoul 3 года назад +1

    Thank you for sharing Jamila. Much appreciated ☺️

  • @ayanverma5746
    @ayanverma5746 3 года назад +1

    *Your voice is very soothing*

  • @marialovesmusicalot
    @marialovesmusicalot 3 года назад +6

    Omg I'm early!!! Tysm for uploading Mrs. Jamila.😊 I love your content and your personality. ♡ I aspire to know as much as you in etiquette. Please don't stop teaching us!

  • @oliveserena204
    @oliveserena204 3 года назад +1

    I found your channel yesterday and I have watched your videos with great interest. They are very helpful.

  • @evaegis4135
    @evaegis4135 3 года назад +1

    Wow, your voice so soft and even you also replying all of these comments ✨
    Thank, it was helpful

  • @wisdomliving99
    @wisdomliving99 3 года назад +3

    Woww i just love yor speaking style and the way you're moving hands, n the vocabs!

  • @missamu7997
    @missamu7997 2 года назад +1

    When i feel that the other person is listening actively to what i am saying i feel so happy it boost your self esteem that what you re saying is worthy to be listened even if the topic is not special
    Thank youu for the video ❤❤

  • @cliyanage9187
    @cliyanage9187 3 года назад

    You are a good instructor. Very clear. Thanks dearie 🌸

  • @bawihpuiifanai4161
    @bawihpuiifanai4161 3 года назад +1

    Wow.. I've been searching this kind of channel... ♥

  • @wisdomliving99
    @wisdomliving99 3 года назад +3

    I turn on the notification 💛 so i never miss your much needful vids..

  • @phuongnguyengia9518
    @phuongnguyengia9518 3 года назад

    Thank you so much! Since I have known your youtube channel, my life was totally change

    • @JamilaMusayeva
      @JamilaMusayeva  3 года назад +1

      So happy to hear that! You are welcome!

  • @jamesnicholls5994
    @jamesnicholls5994 3 года назад

    Your videos are not only very informative but very relaxing. Great content, thank you.

  • @claireh1089
    @claireh1089 Год назад

    I love your channel . So useful for people nowadays . 🎉

  • @pdube
    @pdube 3 года назад +1

    I really admire your confidence and wish to have the same one-day

  • @thedominationer3070
    @thedominationer3070 3 года назад +1

    Why are these videos so damn relaxing?!

  • @gokceoz1366
    @gokceoz1366 3 года назад

    when i listen you i hear both the sound of silence and your smooth voice at the same time which make me calm down. thanks for showing your experience on how to speak in all your videos.

  • @nabiharahman5651
    @nabiharahman5651 3 года назад

    YOU ARE MY BEST TEACHER THANK YOU

  • @michelleaniel5350
    @michelleaniel5350 3 года назад

    Another superb and very informative video, thank you Jamila! You actually remind me of a celebrity and political figure from the Philippines . You look and talk like her.

  • @zuneerabeegum3042
    @zuneerabeegum3042 3 года назад +1

    I just love & enjoy all of your videos ❤️ it's very informative and your voice is soothing 😘 lots of love 🥰

  • @lolaland1176
    @lolaland1176 3 года назад +1

    Thank you so much for all this advises ❤

  • @giorgiagatti2621
    @giorgiagatti2621 3 года назад

    totally the best channel ever

  • @vignesh5924
    @vignesh5924 3 года назад +2

    This youtube recommendation has made me a good listener..

  • @andreebelisle6866
    @andreebelisle6866 3 года назад

    Fantastique! I’m impressed !

  • @Mmemetathinking
    @Mmemetathinking 3 года назад

    Thank you for this video. and congratulations for the subscribers. You went from 27k last month to 200k subscribers!

  • @alissaayeshamarian769
    @alissaayeshamarian769 3 года назад

    i like the way you talk, most espicially the way you speech i will remember my teacher in high school and my college day

  • @fathimaayoob2162
    @fathimaayoob2162 3 года назад +2

    I am a New Subscriber & Am Loving this!❤

  • @AsmaaOAli
    @AsmaaOAli 3 года назад +1

    I love this video. it helped me a lot. And for that reason I thank you.
    I would like you to make a video of using voice tones in different places. how to use it etc...i think it is really important, and how it effects it with talking to people.
    btw i love your video:)

  • @marieg1942
    @marieg1942 3 года назад +1

    Thank you for this💜

  • @maheshbhagat4019
    @maheshbhagat4019 3 года назад +1

    Your Voice tone is amazing 👏😍

  • @sophiemendez98
    @sophiemendez98 3 года назад

    Why would someone dislike this???
    Thank you for this video! It’s extremely useful!

  • @margitte6782
    @margitte6782 3 года назад +1

    You're such an inspiration! Can you please do a video on how to act on a first date?

  • @fatema7589
    @fatema7589 3 года назад +1

    You're so elegant 💕💕😍 Ly your vids are so helpful keep going 💓😊

  • @timeadomonics6514
    @timeadomonics6514 3 года назад

    I love the content of your video, it’s very useful, and l love the WAY you deliver it. But actually what I really want to comment on is how beautiful your dress is!!! It’s gorgeous! 🤩

  • @PrincessJas24
    @PrincessJas24 3 года назад

    Love your channel, thank you! ❤️

  • @sharonwanjuki1633
    @sharonwanjuki1633 3 года назад +11

    l am a new subscriber and l would love 2 start feminine life and l love how you teach us thank a lot God bless

  • @MiriamVance.
    @MiriamVance. 3 года назад +1

    Can you share more on elegance and motherhood? I’d love to hear your thoughts on how you maintain composure and how it translates into motherhood and your dynamic with your children!

  • @natural91LC
    @natural91LC 3 года назад +1

    OMG you're almost at 200k. lol last video you were at 30k :) CONGRATULATIONS ! very well deserved

  • @FatimaAhmed-hd9nn
    @FatimaAhmed-hd9nn 3 года назад

    I really appreciate the tips you shared and the topic, because I didn't know how to be a good listener and I'm learning. You're video has been really helpful :) thank you!

  • @cashivamkumari
    @cashivamkumari 3 года назад

    I often get time to watch RUclips at night & past few months are quite rough for me, so I feel difficulty in sleeping these days.. One fine night, I came across your channel!! I don't know how much etiquettes I have learned yet but your voice definitely acts as a lullaby to me!! Listening to you really calms my mind 😇
    Plz share a video on how to speak politely.. Hoping to see more from you ☺

  • @stefanolongo4359
    @stefanolongo4359 3 года назад

    I love this woman

  • @ttwfil
    @ttwfil 3 года назад

    I love your videos??? There are so interesting and you have such a calming and guiding energy
    I am personally struggling with debating or defending myself in an argument in an impactful, confident, and "elegant" way? I am a bit tired of not being to come up with any good counterpoints and losing faces, finishing either by yelling or being borderline crying ahah so a "How to debate or be in argument etiquette" with some tips and tricks would be much appreciated

  • @royalenglish4962
    @royalenglish4962 3 года назад

    Your voice is sooo amazing!💖💖💖

  • @louiebtr
    @louiebtr 3 года назад

    I have seen all your videos and I love them ❤️

  • @dhrumithaker454
    @dhrumithaker454 3 года назад +1

    You are amazing!! And i looove watching you! Looking forward to more content :)))

  • @teddyillusion2186
    @teddyillusion2186 Год назад

    Thank you, I really found this helpful and encouraging.

  • @anchi7421
    @anchi7421 3 года назад +1

    Please make a video on how to look attractive. Really need this video from you.

  • @lisatrebe1090
    @lisatrebe1090 3 года назад +1

    Hi, I would love a video about Skincare as you mentioned that you love skincare as well 💕

  • @civilizeddiva
    @civilizeddiva 3 года назад

    I mirror the active listening skills of my favorite television detectives. Many of their techniques were sprinkled throughout this tutorial. Not stated, but also implied: this is the best way to get to know someone you would like to know better. It’s the small details they share (I.e., night time rituals, personal habits). Then you can take that data, and when the time comes, share gifts they will appreciate (I.e. favorite tea retailers, hand-cream ) or just share helpful tips. For example, one of my colleagues enjoys the same coffee-creamer that I use. The item is frequently out of stock, so we would let each other know when it was restocked. Occasionally, when I saw she was having a busy day, I would stop at the store during my lunch hour and pick up a container for us both. Small gestures mean the most.

  • @girlhappy6442
    @girlhappy6442 3 года назад +1

    Love your videos

  • @sohahm
    @sohahm 2 года назад

    How can I speak like you? Slowly, with patience, and so much grace like a princess. It is mesmerizing and creates a magnetism that freezes the audience.

  • @sreejitakarmakar8488
    @sreejitakarmakar8488 3 года назад

    I am so glad that I'm exactly how you taught us to be in this video. I've been told previously that I'm a good listener. And I'm unconsciously doing all the things which you are teaching here. And as you were teaching I was even trying to do as you were showing and realised I do those things a lot in general conversations with people. I think people who are naturally introverted have some qualities of being good listeners.

  • @l.-gz7ny
    @l.-gz7ny 9 месяцев назад +1

    Cómo ser un buen oyente
    - Comunicación no verbal (lenguaje corporal)
    + Sonreír al ver a la persona, puedes mantenerla durante toda la conversación
    + Contacto visual, mantener el contacto durante toda la conversación, puedes ver otras partes de la cara pero siempre regresar a los ojos (al principio puedes ver la nariz
    + Posturas abiertas, inclinarte con la persona, no cruzar piernas o brazos, abrir las manos, el pecho
    + Postura de la cara, ponerla un poco inclinada, acercarte un poco, puedes poner la mano en la cara
    + Asentir a lo que dicen
    + Ser un espejo, hacer lo que hace la otra persona
    - Comunicación verbal
    + Usar palabras de refuerzo, decir "si, no, en serio, woow"
    + Hacer preguntas acerca de lo que están diciendo
    + Repetir o hacer una reflexión de lo que te están diciendo
    + Aclarar algunas cosas, haz preguntas abiertas
    + Sumario, con tus palabras parafrasea lo que te dijeron
    + No solo revisa la información, sino también el tono con el que lo dicen

  • @pallabchowdhury5045
    @pallabchowdhury5045 3 года назад

    I really really wanted this video thank you so much

  • @hannahkiddie8245
    @hannahkiddie8245 3 года назад

    Public speaking and telephone manners will be a good topic.

  • @nicoletan6126
    @nicoletan6126 3 года назад

    Hi Jamila! I love all your videos. Love from Philippines :)

  • @BasmahSubliminals
    @BasmahSubliminals 3 года назад

    Your all videos are very much brilliant and I love your post on Dinning Etiquette a lot 🥀 You are so softly teaching us Thank you so much ❤️ love from India 🇮🇳

  • @marynadononeill
    @marynadononeill Месяц назад

    Airplane etiquette, shopping in public etiquette including how to behave in public spaces like shopping malls, doorways, movie theatres, public transport. Voice volume and interacting with strangers.
    -Looking at a phone in public places, blocking other people when in public, etc.
    I was raised to use polite and civilised behaviour in these circumstances but I see that the world is promoting more and more rudeness and loud, bold behaviour.

  • @anitha9005
    @anitha9005 3 года назад

    mesmerizing voice with a beauty😍😍😍

  • @IM-uh5tk
    @IM-uh5tk 3 года назад +3

    Video summary:
    ⏩ Non-verbal etiquettes:
    1- Smile
    2- Make eye contact
    3- Posture (bring your body closer, lean in, position your head upwards, open your hands and chest, etc.)
    4- Nod
    5- Mirroring (reflect what they do)
    ⏩ Verbal etiquettes:
    1- Positive reinforcement messages
    2- Question
    3- Reflection/repeat what they said
    4- Clarification
    5- Summarisation
    6- Don't just listen to the words; also listen to their tone

    • @merry_christmas
      @merry_christmas 3 года назад

      Thank you so much. I love her videos, but as a non-native speaker it's a little difficult to grasp the conclusive summary.

  • @Dandelion_flight
    @Dandelion_flight 3 года назад +1

    Thank you for this video, beautiful lady. Would you make one which teaches us how to speak like you do? I love how you speak.

  • @aditisarangi
    @aditisarangi 3 года назад

    Great content 👏
    Love from India ❤️🇮🇳

  • @nyaradyszabolcs6336
    @nyaradyszabolcs6336 3 года назад

    Wow, you are really amazing! The quality of your videos are so high. I really appreciate the work you do for us! In todays world where social connections get shallower it's very important to be a good listener!

  • @faridhadi6518
    @faridhadi6518 3 года назад

    jamila you have explain your point of view very nicely. you did your work nicely.Farid Hadi