PLEASE create a video talking with people who are in a relationship with someone who has been IN porn. I am currently in a committed relationship with a woman who was in the industry, and she has amassed a very large following from her time there. i wasn't in the know about her history until recently. it has been a VERY difficult and traumatic experience of truth that has tested my love and patience to levels I have never felt before because i had created a very deep connection with this person before finding out who she really is. To hear stories of people in the same situation and what has helped them would help me tremendously, and for sure I am not the only one experiencing this right now. Thank you so much for all the content you have put out, it has helped me deeply to understand her as a human being and helped cultivate the compassion to be here in the direction of understanding. I really don't want this to distort my perception of love more than it has already.
You are a idiot if t you stay in this relationship. A woman who had alot of different sexual partners in her past, is a disaster waiting to happen, they cant pairbond anymore, and studies say more then 10 partners the change in a divorce will rise to 80%. You wont probally listen, but You will find out. Goodluck, you need it.
I just realised that the jump cuts at around 2:30 between the close up of the interviewee and the studio scene are so powerful because they show the nature of how we perceive reality though different angles. Imagine if you watched porn this way - jumping between a closeup and a studio scene with camera and sound guys.. It would totally destroy the illusion
Addiction feels like having two identities, but one of them is a higher self that is absolutely against addictions - fully aware of their harm and trying to dissolve the addict identity, a fake self with fake pleasures.
Im really struggling with a person who wants to be in a relationship with me who says: ' I love porn. Theres nothing wrong with it' Its a beautiful thing. Its natural. It feels good. Youre just jealous its not you on screen. - Like im confused. Im not saying I dont like sex. Im saying it feels wrong to be obssesed with looking at the genitals of strangers and having sex with them in my mind.
Scientists found out that meditation and practicing empathy, love gratitude daily make the brain and body younger. Some call it orgasm between the brain and heart. Because the emotions and feelings coming from the heart such as love empathy and gratitude, activate an enzyme called telomeres, which makes you feel happier, look younger, and live longer. They found out that the heart has its own brain, that the electromagnetic field of the heart is much bigger than the electromagnetic field of the brain. The brain is about logic. Heart is nota bout logic, as love is not about logic. Therefore people feel empathy and gratitude easily. It increases the energy of the body, because it doesn't require a reason to feel happy and loving.
Hope this channel grows exponentially in the next years, its time that we people become aware of the true poison of pornography. Thanks to the people behind this channel, I truly believe you are making a change
Thanks. My husband and I are in our 50's, have been together for 30 years. I only recently found out about the problems he had acquired when he was young and the addiction that has existed for 25 years and has been massive at times. He was so addicted and jaded that at one point he even started going to prostitutes. I finally understand what happened in our relationship. And why I got worse and worse over the decades. Depression, fears, a completely destroyed self-esteem. At some point I even dismantled my femininity, no makeup, no jewelry, shaved head hair to 9mm, neutral and boring clothes. I was no longer worth anything to myself, even allowed myself to be exploited in my employment relationship to the point of burnout, because I so urgently needed positive confirmation from somewhere that I was worth something. Our children didn't develop well and I now understand why that happened. I now understand that it wasn't my fault that originally I wasn't the sick person - but now I am because of my husband's illness, which was always invisible. We're both fighting to heal now, and it's an uphill battle.
@@AndrewMai As I understand your post, your husband had a problem with excessive porn consumption. Is this correct? What I'm confused about, how did that cause you to abandon your femineity? "no makeup, no jewelry, shaved head hair to 9mm, neutral and boring clothes." Why did you choose to present yourself in a "boring" manner?
@@drewj4297You addressed the wrong person, the comment came from me. I would have to go a long way to explain, so please forgive me for keeping it a little short. Especially since the long-term effects on the partners of porn-addicted men are well documented and some have already been researched - but unfortunately still too little. However, it could be one of the reasons why couples' ability to form relationships is declining in industrialized nations and why divorce and separation rates are constantly increasing. There are also forums on the Internet where relatives exchange ideas, and you often read the same things over and over again. The effects that porn addiction has on the sufferer's brain and body come on slowly and gradually. The addict becomes less and less emotionally available, less resilient, their sexual desire and style of sexuality changes, their sexual performance decreases (the famous porn-induced erectile dysfunction! The addict just doesn't see the connection, they "blame" their partner , unconscious or conscious). The sensitivity of the penis also decreases because of the death grip, a vagina simply cannot build up the pressure that the man exerts when masturbating with his hand. Also, the addict needs stronger and stronger triggers, so their brain becomes less and less responsive to the stimuli of a normal, real-world woman; many addicts often or constantly have inner images or films in the porn context. The often simultaneously existing masturbation addiction (several times a day) maintains - together with the inner pictures/films - the chemical changes responsible for the brain changes. These are just a few examples. We partners change almost in lockstep with the addict without knowing what is really going on. Well, so much is going on subliminally. Of course, there are also addicts who, as their addiction progresses (and then they have to increase their triggers, like an alcoholic who needs more and more alcohol), watch more and more blatant porn content (up to and including criminal content) even though it is not their real preferences corresponds. Some of them then ask their partners to do more and more violent things at home. Overall, I'm not sure if every woman would go along with all these changes or if it takes certain character traits to do so. All in all, we women are still brought up differently anyway, so that might play a role. And personally I'm the child of (sometimes violent) addicts, my husband was traumatized multiple times as a child (so he was prone to developing addictions - and his masturbatory addiction started in childhood) and was also exposed to pornography at an early age, we both grew up in a red light district, I myself am the daughter of a former prostitute 🤷🏻 I guess our pot and lid went together perfectly from the start. If you are really interested in the topic on a factual level, I can absolutely recommend the book "Your Brain on Porn" by Gary Wilson, where many of those affected also have their say.
@@hasbroslatestglitch Thank you very much. There is still a huge mountain of sadness and fears, as well as a few half-truths that we - especially me - have to overcome. No two days are ever the same. But my husband shows me how much he loves me by standing by my side even on my very dark days, when I just ruminate and really question everything, even what he sees in me. Which is what he always did despite his addiction and all the acting out (including with prostitutes), even if he "disappeared in the fog" emotionally for many years. He always says that I was the only thing that always saved him from total destruction, that through me he was always able to return to reality a little bit, because he always loved me and only because of me he was always able to "feel himself" could see that he was “still there”.
His consumption destroyed a four year "relationship". He lied about his use, otherwise I would have never, ever dated him. I would have never given him a chance. And now everything is in shambles and I don't know if I can ever heal from this
I believe the whole process is a business. The pornogrsphy creators using humans desires to make their business profitable. Once they pay taxes, there official system doesn't have any problems with that. It is all about business and they don't care about the destructive effects that pornography has on the society and individuals
My comment was removed, soI will keep this short. 'The Kinsey Report' is a great start, however, it is not for the sensitive & you might get nauseous like myself.
what jens said, on one hand. on the other hand, sex sells baby! not only we are lustful creatures but also sex/touch/connection is the ultimate individual human goal and desire by many standars so its no surprise that it has been legitimized without even thinking about the long term consequences we are just now becoming aware of
Why aren't we also approaching this from the prospective: why are performers involved in this media? Most performers and let's face it, are women. Many of them treat it like it's going to the office.
Porn is like a fork. You can kill with it or feed loved ones. Content that states that porn is 0 or 1 is just biased BS. It's all about balance, self-consciousness, and COMMUNICATION (!!!!!!!). (31M & 30F) We continuously grow in our sex life for more than 11 years and porn inspired us countless times to explore ourselves in new ways. We almost always choose to watch amateur couples. IF YOU HAVE TOXIC RELATION WITH PORN, PLEASE DON'T MEASURE EVERYONE BY YOUR OWN STANDARDS - THIS IS TOXIC AF. People are not Teslas with manuals; this is a very individual topic. Stay safe!
I haven't watched the video yet, but I'll speak from experience. I've been with the same women for 36 years, nearly married 34 years, we have occasionally been watching porn since we were dating, age 17. Our responsible use of porn hasn't harmed our relationship in the least. I would argue that it has made a positive impact on our sex life. I'm a firm believer that good sex is important to maintaining a healthy relationship. The excessive usage of anything is harmful. Carrots are healthy. But if all you consume is carrots, you are going to get sick. I think the same is true for porn. It isn't inherently bad or harmful. Excessive consumption, just like carrots, sugar, salt, calories, ext., is the problem.
Except there is no such thing as too much love too much empathy, too much gratitude too much kindness, too much happiness. the nonphysical things that bring a lot of good feelings and joy, inspiration motivation, but you enjoy them because its not possible to measure it by numbers.
In this video, Donald L. Hilton Jr., MD speaks to Youth and Parents about Pornography and its impact on the Brain. the expert explains that drugs, food addiction, sex or porn addiction all of them cause the shrinking of the prefrontal cortex brain. Some say sex addiction also affects the level of intelligence and decreases memory. Now I understand why some of these people look so old in face, tired, and demotivated, unattractive, like used clothes. they completely lost sense and pleasure from innocent and natural things, like
@@alaalfa8839 Ok, I concede the point, you cannot have to much love, empathy or kindness. Although as I´m writing that, I think it unwise to show your enemy love or kindness. When your enemy punches you in the face and you show them kindness, your only more likely to get punched in the face again. Perhaps there are times when love and kindness must be put aside to defend one´s right to not be attacked. Otherwise, the main point remains, the problem is excess or addiction to anything is the problem. So perhaps this channel should realize it isn´t that porn is a problem, it is the excess consumption of porn or any other item is the problem.
@@alaalfa8839 ¨the expert explains that drug, food addiction, sex or porn addiction all of the cause shrinking of the prefrontal cortex." This supports my claim that porn isn't the problem, addiction to nearly anything is the problem.
@@drewj4297 But any porn is bad. Sex trafficking women is a result of the porn industry. You like that? And in what world is it normal for a person to watch 2,3,4,5,6 people having sex?
PLEASE create a video talking with people who are in a relationship with someone who has been IN porn. I am currently in a committed relationship with a woman who was in the industry, and she has amassed a very large following from her time there. i wasn't in the know about her history until recently. it has been a VERY difficult and traumatic experience of truth that has tested my love and patience to levels I have never felt before because i had created a very deep connection with this person before finding out who she really is. To hear stories of people in the same situation and what has helped them would help me tremendously, and for sure I am not the only one experiencing this right now. Thank you so much for all the content you have put out, it has helped me deeply to understand her as a human being and helped cultivate the compassion to be here in the direction of understanding. I really don't want this to distort my perception of love more than it has already.
What’s her name? Did you meet her at Niagara Falls?
@angussneef I don't feel comfortable sharing names, why do you ask the Niagara falls question?
You are a idiot if t you stay in this relationship. A woman who had alot of different sexual partners in her past, is a disaster waiting to happen, they cant pairbond anymore, and studies say more then 10 partners the change in a divorce will rise to 80%. You wont probally listen, but You will find out. Goodluck, you need it.
@@everythingisequal789710 months on, update?
I just realised that the jump cuts at around 2:30 between the close up of the interviewee and the studio scene are so powerful because they show the nature of how we perceive reality though different angles. Imagine if you watched porn this way - jumping between a closeup and a studio scene with camera and sound guys.. It would totally destroy the illusion
So why lust a million girls, when you can love one girl a million ways?
You're not a man?
Short answer...porn blows relationships to smithereens!...you see the wall of destruction in front of you but you still drive into it at full speed...
well said
Addiction feels like having two identities, but one of them is a higher self that is absolutely against addictions - fully aware of their harm and trying to dissolve the addict identity, a fake self with fake pleasures.
It’s just deep denial at its worst
and the way our culture normalizes violence against women doesn’t help , it only makes men feel valid in their use of it
Im really struggling with a person who wants to be in a relationship with me who says: ' I love porn. Theres nothing wrong with it' Its a beautiful thing. Its natural. It feels good. Youre just jealous its not you on screen.
- Like im confused.
Im not saying I dont like sex. Im saying it feels wrong to be obssesed with looking at the genitals of strangers and having sex with them in my mind.
Scientists found out that meditation and practicing empathy, love gratitude daily make the brain and body younger. Some call it orgasm between the brain and heart. Because the emotions and feelings coming from the heart such as love empathy and gratitude, activate an enzyme called telomeres, which makes you feel happier, look younger, and live longer.
They found out that the heart has its own brain, that the electromagnetic field of the heart is much bigger than the electromagnetic field of the brain. The brain is about logic. Heart is nota bout logic, as love is not about logic. Therefore people feel empathy and gratitude easily. It increases the energy of the body, because it doesn't require a reason to feel happy and loving.
Pornography is the ultimate Purpose Killer.
Drug addicts get money to use.
Porn addicts can't even get money in the first place
Hope this channel grows exponentially in the next years, its time that we people become aware of the true poison of pornography.
Thanks to the people behind this channel, I truly believe you are making a change
I didn’t feel good after watching porn. I quit long time ago. It’s a real harm, I am glad people talk about harm of porn more and more
It harms big time. It is a no-brainer how destructive this drug is. Such a poison to everyone especially men.
Thanks.
My husband and I are in our 50's, have been together for 30 years.
I only recently found out about the problems he had acquired when he was young and the addiction that has existed for 25 years and has been massive at times.
He was so addicted and jaded that at one point he even started going to prostitutes.
I finally understand what happened in our relationship.
And why I got worse and worse over the decades. Depression, fears, a completely destroyed self-esteem.
At some point I even dismantled my femininity, no makeup, no jewelry, shaved head hair to 9mm, neutral and boring clothes.
I was no longer worth anything to myself, even allowed myself to be exploited in my employment relationship to the point of burnout, because I so urgently needed positive confirmation from somewhere that I was worth something.
Our children didn't develop well and I now understand why that happened.
I now understand that it wasn't my fault that originally I wasn't the sick person - but now I am because of my husband's illness, which was always invisible.
We're both fighting to heal now, and it's an uphill battle.
Glad you both realized it and are taking action now.
@@AndrewMai As I understand your post, your husband had a problem with excessive porn consumption. Is this correct? What I'm confused about, how did that cause you to abandon your femineity? "no makeup, no jewelry, shaved head hair to 9mm, neutral and boring clothes." Why did you choose to present yourself in a "boring" manner?
@@drewj4297You addressed the wrong person, the comment came from me. I would have to go a long way to explain, so please forgive me for keeping it a little short. Especially since the long-term effects on the partners of porn-addicted men are well documented and some have already been researched - but unfortunately still too little. However, it could be one of the reasons why couples' ability to form relationships is declining in industrialized nations and why divorce and separation rates are constantly increasing. There are also forums on the Internet where relatives exchange ideas, and you often read the same things over and over again. The effects that porn addiction has on the sufferer's brain and body come on slowly and gradually. The addict becomes less and less emotionally available, less resilient, their sexual desire and style of sexuality changes, their sexual performance decreases (the famous porn-induced erectile dysfunction! The addict just doesn't see the connection, they "blame" their partner , unconscious or conscious).
The sensitivity of the penis also decreases because of the death grip, a vagina simply cannot build up the pressure that the man exerts when masturbating with his hand.
Also, the addict needs stronger and stronger triggers, so their brain becomes less and less responsive to the stimuli of a normal, real-world woman; many addicts often or constantly have inner images or films in the porn context.
The often simultaneously existing masturbation addiction (several times a day) maintains - together with the inner pictures/films - the chemical changes responsible for the brain changes.
These are just a few examples.
We partners change almost in lockstep with the addict without knowing what is really going on. Well, so much is going on subliminally. Of course, there are also addicts who, as their addiction progresses (and then they have to increase their triggers, like an alcoholic who needs more and more alcohol), watch more and more blatant porn content (up to and including criminal content) even though it is not their real preferences corresponds.
Some of them then ask their partners to do more and more violent things at home.
Overall, I'm not sure if every woman would go along with all these changes or if it takes certain character traits to do so.
All in all, we women are still brought up differently anyway, so that might play a role.
And personally I'm the child of (sometimes violent) addicts, my husband was traumatized multiple times as a child (so he was prone to developing addictions - and his masturbatory addiction started in childhood) and was also exposed to pornography at an early age, we both grew up in a red light district, I myself am the daughter of a former prostitute 🤷🏻 I guess our pot and lid went together perfectly from the start.
If you are really interested in the topic on a factual level, I can absolutely recommend the book "Your Brain on Porn" by Gary Wilson, where many of those affected also have their say.
Wishing you all the best for the future
@@hasbroslatestglitch Thank you very much.
There is still a huge mountain of sadness and fears, as well as a few half-truths that we - especially me - have to overcome. No two days are ever the same. But my husband shows me how much he loves me by standing by my side even on my very dark days, when I just ruminate and really question everything, even what he sees in me. Which is what he always did despite his addiction and all the acting out (including with prostitutes), even if he "disappeared in the fog" emotionally for many years.
He always says that I was the only thing that always saved him from total destruction, that through me he was always able to return to reality a little bit, because he always loved me and only because of me he was always able to "feel himself" could see that he was “still there”.
Thank you for sharing this. The world can heal through conversations like this
His consumption destroyed a four year "relationship". He lied about his use, otherwise I would have never, ever dated him. I would have never given him a chance. And now everything is in shambles and I don't know if I can ever heal from this
It helps to harm a relationship
This should be shared across
Hi fight the new drug! ...i love this video! My name is juan, and i was wondering.. Can you guys do a video on the harms of "soft porn?"
who created pornography and who stays behind and pushes it?
I believe the whole process is a business. The pornogrsphy creators using humans desires to make their business profitable. Once they pay taxes, there official system doesn't have any problems with that. It is all about business and they don't care about the destructive effects that pornography has on the society and individuals
Joe Biden
@@amr220022
that’s not business
that’s exploitation worth of serious prosecution and punishment
My comment was removed, soI will keep this short. 'The Kinsey Report' is a great start, however, it is not for the sensitive & you might get nauseous like myself.
I've had two long-term girlfriends. My addiction to porn has been major contributing factor to the breakup of both relationships.
No, don't blame addiction, there is no such thing, you weren't into those women as much as you were porn. Your fault for dating women you didn't want
despite of the destructive and harmful effects of Porn, why did system legitimize it ?
because the system was neither meant to help humans nor nature as a whole
what jens said, on one hand. on the other hand, sex sells baby! not only we are lustful creatures but also sex/touch/connection is the ultimate individual human goal and desire by many standars so its no surprise that it has been legitimized without even thinking about the long term consequences we are just now becoming aware of
@@JensVanDeAarde In the U.S. porn is protected under freedom of speech.
I am guessing one answer might be, it would be almost impossible to police if it were made illegal.
Great video thanks for this. Watching these videos as well as doing recovery really helps
Very good video! Keep it up, guys!
This is extremely illuminating and helpful; thank-you.
Why aren't we also approaching this from the prospective: why are performers involved in this media? Most performers and let's face it, are women. Many of them treat it like it's going to the office.
you are doing gods work! thank you!
Very important information.
True, preach
What is porn? Have any of the studies you cited researched among couples who watch porn together?
Yep. Couples of different ages across different countries.. The results are consistent: never positive.
Yuk I’d never watch porn with a man
@undertheriverstone your actually quite wrong ( as usual ) women do enjoy porn and rate their sex lives more fulfilling with it's use.
@@mustardtree6640you sound boring, you're the kind of woman a man avoids
Please add more languages subtitles
Porn is like a fork. You can kill with it or feed loved ones. Content that states that porn is 0 or 1 is just biased BS. It's all about balance, self-consciousness, and COMMUNICATION (!!!!!!!). (31M & 30F) We continuously grow in our sex life for more than 11 years and porn inspired us countless times to explore ourselves in new ways. We almost always choose to watch amateur couples. IF YOU HAVE TOXIC RELATION WITH PORN, PLEASE DON'T MEASURE EVERYONE BY YOUR OWN STANDARDS - THIS IS TOXIC AF. People are not Teslas with manuals; this is a very individual topic. Stay safe!
You both watch porn? That's not bad
💯
👍
👏👏👏
I haven't watched the video yet, but I'll speak from experience. I've been with the same women for 36 years, nearly married 34 years, we have occasionally been watching porn since we were dating, age 17. Our responsible use of porn hasn't harmed our relationship in the least. I would argue that it has made a positive impact on our sex life. I'm a firm believer that good sex is important to maintaining a healthy relationship. The excessive usage of anything is harmful. Carrots are healthy. But if all you consume is carrots, you are going to get sick. I think the same is true for porn. It isn't inherently bad or harmful. Excessive consumption, just like carrots, sugar, salt, calories, ext., is the problem.
Except there is no such thing as too much love too much empathy, too much gratitude too much kindness, too much happiness.
the nonphysical things that bring a lot of good feelings and joy, inspiration motivation, but you enjoy them because its not possible to measure it by numbers.
In this video, Donald L. Hilton Jr., MD speaks to Youth and Parents about Pornography and its impact on the Brain.
the expert explains that drugs, food addiction, sex or porn addiction all of them cause the shrinking of the prefrontal cortex brain.
Some say sex addiction also affects the level of intelligence and decreases memory.
Now I understand why some of these people look so old in face, tired, and demotivated, unattractive, like used clothes.
they completely lost sense and pleasure from innocent and natural things, like
@@alaalfa8839 Ok, I concede the point, you cannot have to much love, empathy or kindness. Although as I´m writing that, I think it unwise to show your enemy love or kindness. When your enemy punches you in the face and you show them kindness, your only more likely to get punched in the face again. Perhaps there are times when love and kindness must be put aside to defend one´s right to not be attacked. Otherwise, the main point remains, the problem is excess or addiction to anything is the problem. So perhaps this channel should realize it isn´t that porn is a problem, it is the excess consumption of porn or any other item is the problem.
@@alaalfa8839 ¨the expert explains that drug, food addiction, sex or porn addiction all of the cause shrinking of the prefrontal cortex." This supports my claim that porn isn't the problem, addiction to nearly anything is the problem.
@@drewj4297 But any porn is bad. Sex trafficking women is a result of the porn industry. You like that? And in what world is it normal for a person to watch 2,3,4,5,6 people having sex?