Just to clarify: this is not a video explaining the canon lore of Security Breach. This is MY version of the story. My goal was to expand Vanessa/Vanny's purpose and presence, give explanations to things that had none, let the other animatronics have more to do, and make a satisfying ending. ALSO I'm saying this now, but I regret implying Bonnie used to be around. If I were to redo this, I would take Bonnie out of the story entirely since I didn't do anything with him, so mentioning him was pointless on my part. Anyway, did you like the rewrite? XD
@@CB7368 yeah, I know that's implied in canon, but I didn't expand on it, so for my rewrite, I probably shouldn't have mentioned it at all lol. That's my bad!
Its great that only William is back and only digitally. Shows how smart he was to make a back up and still made Micheal and Henry's sacrifice not in vain. In freeing the old spirits but Gregory and Freddy took out Glitchtrap's plan B.
It makes sense. His own ego being what destroyed him. He wanted to be immortal, but that digital facsimile turned out to be the tool of his own destruction
Imagine if there was a split where you could do the canon way of dismantling the animatronics with Freddy getting mad and leaving, getting caught and turned by glitch trap or you could try and find a way to free them from glitch’s control, gaining more allies but Vanny deploys some last minute scrap backups using old parts and mixing them together to make horrible scary abominations that hunt Gregory ruthlessly.
I haven't finished the video yet but I was thinking something similar Maybe make it branch three ways if you think Steel Wool could handle it, or at least three full ways but obviously you can sort of cross back and forth with each Animatronic if you wanna go part way for the lulz 1: The Hacked Route: Either ignore or fail to deal with the Animatronics. They will continue operating like normal, and you do not get access to their upgrades. 2: The Shatter Route: Break the Animatronics and get their upgrades. This would, like in the canon game, not give them back control, and they're hunting strategies change, usually inferior to when they weren't Shattered. And also turn Freddy into a super soldier lol. *Hopefully that doesn't backfire on you* 3: The Savior Route: Find a way to basically debug the Animatronics and remove Vanny's control over them, giving them back their free will. This takes them out of hunting Gregory completely and gives you a new ally. Using their upgrades however is a bit more work since you have them in four separate bodies instead of one. The twist, like it seems could happen in this video, is that since Freddy just malfunctioned and went into Safe Mode rather than having his hack directly dealt with, the less control Vanny has over the others, the more she can exert over Freddy after 6 AM.
You could also backup this change by altering Gameplay based on the choice. The four Glamrock animatronics have clear, obvious patterns that you could exploit, so just scrapping them is easy. But should you chose to save them, the scrap-tronics Vanny would use have much more erratic, spontaneous behaviors and more violent attacks, making them a greater challenge.
@@TheArtisticAloubell Fantastic video! I wish I wasn't so busy today so I could've watched it in one go but I still really enjoyed it! As buggy as SB is, I do think the open endedness of so many plot points allows for people to do so many different things with it. It's all so amazing! I especially liked that you made the other animatronics have more purpose, with the befriending and helping Gregory.
@@47ratsinahoodie thank you! I'm so glad you like how it turned out x3 MatPat originally had a theory (before SB came out) that Gregory would free the animatronics one by one and they would help you get through the pizzaplex. Such as Monty being the one to go through the cyclone gates, not Freddy with Monty's claws. So I combined what happened in canon and that theory x3 I'm definitely okay with SB being open ended to a point...just like how all of the FNAF games have a lot of room for interpretation. But SB just felt the most incomplete to me compared to the other games...idk. As the most technologically advanced game in the series, it somehow has a lot more unanswered questions haha It really does feel like if given more time, the game would feel more complete.
When the game first hinted that you'd need to decommission the animatronics, I legit thought that it would be a choice and that if you did Freddy would eventually find it out understandable get angry. I was not the happiest when I learned that not only was decommissioning the other animatronics mandatory, but Freddy would never find out the truth. The story definitely needed improvement.
Just like Vanessa, he was losing control of himself and so he was Moon for most of the time. He was mainly just lurking around the same as Vanny was. I could have mentioned him more =p But I'm glad you liked! Thank you! 😁
OMG THIS IS THE BEST REWRITE EVER! I’m so brought into tears of so much change in the plot and how the characters change as well honestly this is way better than the original writing I really wish this was in the game it would’ve made it so unique and interesting I’m glad that Vanessa redeemed herself and became a better person that’s character development right there! and the animatronics just excellent but besides that this gets a 100/10 Also your voice acting was amazing as well! (Sorry for making this long :’))
No need to apologize! I like long comments X3 And thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed the rewrite! I like how it came out so I'm happy others are liking it!
@@TheArtisticAloubell the story could actually be like this if they didn't try to chunck in some parts of the game and gave it a longer time for preparing security breach
Petition for this to be the actual story of security breach Also I like to think Gregory could also build a mini Bonnie so Freddy can have his bro back 😎
@@TheArtisticAloubellmaybe you can make a rewrite of Ruin continuing this? Introduce the Mimic and the other animatronics though a bit burned and all. Without memory or personality chips they would be very agressive and dangerous though It would be interested how Cassie would survive. Also for the Mimic being sealed could be: Vanessa and Gregory found out about the Mimic hiding underground and sealed him as they had no way to fight it off due to having no animatronics with them
I like the ending and all but, if this were to be official it would end the that series most likely. The true ending set more pathway for another game. Still like it!
Actually! I think my story does have potential to spin sequels because: 1.) Since Gregory is a tech genius, he's capable of making animatronics of his own when he gets older 2.) The VR game could have affected other people and so A.I. Afton could still be running around somewhere X3 Thank you so much for watching the whole video and commenting! ^0^ And I'm glad you liked it
This is a WONDERFUL rewrite!! I love how it’s the upgrades that make them evil and when they get taken away they turn good! Also when I got that part and realized that Freddy killed the kids too…. I was pretty sad about that ngl.. but it’s good storytelling so it’s all good I wonder how the animatronics feel about being mini 🤔
Oh wow! I really love this rewrite! It explains a lot of the things that aren’t explained in the game like the how the animatronics were reprogrammed and how Gregory knew about the missing kids when it was never mentioned in the game until the player has the choice to leave or stay. It’s also nice to see the other animatronics help Gregory and be able to snap themselves out of William’s control as well instead of just having them hunt down Gregory without being able to help them return to being Freddy’s friends and leaving them behind. The ending you wrote is also much more satisfying since William is defeated and Vanessa is able to break out of his control with lots of details about how the VR mind control works and how Gregory helped Vanessa regain control. Everyone gets a happy ending and it’s nice to see all of them live at Vanessa’s parents’ home. Great job! EDIT: Adding on, I also liked how you gave Gregory more backstory with his foster family and how he’s tech savvy and street smart. It explains a lot about how he’s able to navigate the Pizzaplex as well as invent stuff and mess with the technology there and animatronics. Again, so many good details and ideas
Aww thank you so much for your kind words! ^0^ I'm glad you liked how the rewrite came out X3 I'm usually okay with the vagueness of FNAF as the hidden mini games and other details allow people to piece together the story. But Security Breach...idk...something just feels so incomplete about it...as if even the developers didn't know what was happening. I feel like the game is missing a lot of relevant details that it'll never explain. So I figured I'd make something up and connect the dots lol
@@TheArtisticAloubell Yeah, mystery is nice and all, but the details that are missing felt important to know. All of the endings in the game don’t feel satisfying or complete and leaves a lot more questions and things unresolved. I guess they might have rushed the game a bit, so seeing you flesh out the story more is nice.
Super freaking awesome. I really enjoyed hearing your retelling of Security Breach, and it's satisfying to see that Vanessa, Vanny and Afton had a lot more presence. The liar reveal between Gregory and Freddy was a good addition (I wanted to see Freddy addressing the decommissions of the animatronics haha). Awesome artwork too. Also, the Blob was completely wiped out from this story lol.
50:21 I loved this rewrite! You did such a great job with the timing. You didnt make anything change too fast or slow. You gave the characters actual development and so on. All im going to say is, you did a spectacular job with this rewrite.
That ending was so fricking adorable aaaAAaAAAAAA- I honestly felt more invested in this rewrite when compared to what happened in canon.This also gave a lot more explanation of what had happened,which is something the original lacked
I think this video really satisfied a need for a well-rounded story and by combining elements of the endings too! Bravo, I'm considering it my new favorite fanon take. Great art as well, I can really tell you put lots of effort into this rewrite :) /gen
Okay, First thing: This works for a movie more than a game, wich doesn't change the fact it's amazing. Second thing: Can we be sure Glitchtrap is gone? I mean after all, as he says: "I Always Come Back". Plus, since this story suggests Vanessa is Tape Girl, There is still the Beta Tester we play as in Help Wanted, not forgetting about the fact we don't know if Jeremy is actually dead.
This did a really good job of tying in canon, but still telling a unique story in the franchise. My only complaint is that Music Man and the Wet Floor Sign bots were left behind.
This is seriously a good rewrite. It adds a lot more personality and dynamics between the animatronics, which we don’t really get to see. Yes, they have a ton of personality, which I love, but they don’t really talk TO each other, and just talk to Gregory as they’re hunting him. Also, I love the liar revealed thing between Gregory and Freddy, when Freddy finds out what Gregory’s done to his friends, and he doesn’t just brush it off. That was honestly what I was expecting in the game, to add some nice drama and emotion, but alas, that never happened. And FINALLY, we get a backstory for what Gregory’s doing at the Pizzaplex in the first place, and why Freddy suddenly went haywire, because Gregory’s invention made him malfunction. And there are a lot more emotional ties, because now, a lot of Gregory’s friends are the kids that went missing, giving him more of a reason to explore and investigate. It’s also super interesting to see a CHILD investigating all the crazy stuff instead of an adult, I.e. Michael. Giving Gregory more of a chance to use his wits and technological expertise, despite how young he is. But still having some vulnerable moments, too, such as when the other Glamrock animatronics, now being without their upgrades that MADE them turn evil, comforting him when he was distraught about his previous emotional heartbreak moment with Freddy.
Honestly, I’d much rather have the FNaF series end at FFPS and UCN for the ending it gives is amazing. But if the series had to continue, I like your version a lot more! :D Edit; 26:02 *circus baby flashbacks* extra points if it’s ice cream cake Freddy’s carrying
Man.. The thing I love about hearing fanon before canon, Is that if written well, it's so much better than the canon. I love your creativity and detail in the story and got so deeply invested that I was actually able to imagine if this were to be the real thing. (I used to be a fnaf fan back then but then switched my fandom interest to undertale and mlp, but decided to watch this video because you got great content and creativity) 🐱
I liked the rewrite, are people allowed to apply it to their own universe for FNaF? It's really cool and, while I like the original story of SB, it gives a lot more explanation. Aside from that, this was a great video! I'm excited for the next.
@@megakittenex if it follows really closely to my idea or my story, I'd prefer not. But if it's only inspired by it and takes bits and pieces, I don't mind 😁
I love the rewrite! I think it made a lot of sense and over all had the best ending ever! Its like all of the endings combined together but even better! I really really love how your drawing came out too and also really love the rewrite so much! In my opinion this is one of the best rewrites i ever heard EVER
Great rewrite! The dialogue was kind of odd and clunky at times, but other than that the actual structure and such are great! 14:33 Man, the animatronics are a lot more malevolent and open about it than in the original. 34:20 Way to rub it in, Monty. 34:50 It would be hilarious if, in an alternate version of this scene, she leans in and whispers "you took my fucking eyes". 37:28 Seems like Funtime Freddy got exorcised out of him. 39:22 DEATHROLL! WOO! 40:17 Hearing this line said out loud hurt me. 47:15 I like how you made them separate - it makes it easier to understand Malhare's situation from a lore perspective, while also letting Willy stay dead. 50:50 This feels _very_ anime. 57:23 I was _not_ expecting it to go there.
I swear this would be a lot better than sb turned out to be and just make ruin Cassie going into the burned down building being lured by the afton AI basically how it already plays out
Great video! It was a really good and satisfying ending, but, well.... we know Scott still have plans for other games so he always has to make the story "unfinished" every time, and how he never lets William Afton die it doesn't matter what he goes through, he always comes back.
Scott actually stepped away from FNAF. So any plot moving forward isn't decided by him. I see what you mean, though. All games have hidden lore to them that need to be discovered and I'm usually okay with that. Security Breach feels different than the other games. As of everything wasn't thought through all the way or that it's incomplete. That's why I went out of my way to connect the dots myself x3 Thank you for watching! And I'm glad you enjoyed the video ❤️❤️✨
This is such a sweet story omg. And that ending is wonderful. Great job! Edit: I also like how this retelling doesn't even touch "The Blob" or Peepaw's charred remains like the base game does. It keeps all the closure from the first 6 games intact. Very nice touch :]
I like this one, it doesn't feel like a cool version i wanted to see Also, i like the fnaf books stories, you know when some normal person with some problems runs away, finds something related to Fazbear Entertainment, things go wild, scary, cursed, and may let the protagonist disturbed or with a horrible ending, i would liked if the game could follow that formula but it didn't, it felt more like a generic spooky game
Id argue that in the daycare you should see vanny's eyes, not the suit or anything but the eyes only. this give the idea to the player that there is sabotage and someone playing with him as if he was pray.
This is my working on the plot, or at least how I would reframe it. The game would begin with Gregory arriving at the Pizzaplex, with a brief intro showing the development of the Pizzaplex and the robots, and the mention of the mysterious disappearances. Gregory would watch the show as Freddy crashes upon spotting him. While Freddy recovers in his room, Gregory sneaks around as security guard Vanessa realizes that he is not registered. Finding Freddy's room, he meets Freddy, who offers to help him escape, though when they get past Vanessa in the maintenance tunnels, they arrive at the front gate as it closes. The other animatronics come out and meet Gregory, and they each play with Gregory as they show their respective areas, with Gregory solving a changing maze controlled by Chica, playing a match of mini-golf against Monty, and participating in an actual race with Roxy on the completed raceway. During their time together, while they are friendly, small bits of their character flaws slip out as the virus begins to affect them, such as Gregory catching Chica gorging herself after the maze and ashamedly hiding it, Monty snapping briefly after the match, and Roxy being a bit prickish to Gregory following the race, with the latter two apologizing afterwards. Vanessa then finds Gregory, irritated while also worried and seemingly nervous for some reason. Freddy and the others manage to convince Vanessa that he'll be safe with them; while nervous, Vanessa is assured what with the presence of the other four able to protect him. They decide to set up a show just for Gregory, but just as they start, the three then come under the effects of the virus, activating the previously disabled security mode (mentioned later by Vanessa); Vanessa briefly spots a figure watching from afar. While Freddy holds off the others while taking some mild damage, he tells Vanessa to hide him in the Daycare while she looks for the figure, where Gregory meets Sun; the playful Sun insists that the lights remain on no matter what. When the figure appears briefly and the lights are disabled, Sun begins to transform into Moon, telling Gregory to find the emergency generators to reset the Daycare power before turning. Gregory then avoids Moon (who fears Gregory's flashlight) as he traverses the jungle gym while starting the generators, using his flashlight to hold Moon back. When the lights are restored, Sun removes Gregory from the Daycare for his own safety, revealing his fearful knowledge of his other half. When Gregory reveals what is happening with the other robots, he tells Gregory that he can hide in the main security station overlooking the main hall, but must get a pass from a nearby security station to access it; he also reveals that most of the other bots have a weakness to bright lights as well, and mentions that he can use either a Fazcam or a Fazblaster to defend himself. After taking a shortcut through the tunnels, Gregory narrowly evades the three while he finds the office and holds them off while Vanessa works to remove the lockdown. Finding and entering the main security station, the figure then appears on the screens, and she seemingly sounds an alarm that alerts the bots to his presence. Vanessa realizes that the system has been hacked, so she decides to use her skills to hack it back, sealing the doors. However, the animatronics attempt to break in, and Freddy establishes contact with Gregory, telling him to use the electric shock systems to keep them back from the doors while searching for Freddy on the monitors and opening several doors on a path leading to the room beneath the station. Freddy saves Gregory, and the two decide to head to the Parts and Service area to repair his damage. Gregory briefly heads to the control booth for the stage to activate the stage lift, with them both heading down to Parts and Service. However, as the power briefly dips, Moon appears and attacks, taking Freddy to the repair station. Separated, Gregory finds the entrance to Parts and Service, but he requires another security pass. Vanessa tells him that a pass would likely be in the endoskeleton development area, and Gregory enters to find it. However, the seemingly docile endos then activate on their own, and Gregory uses his flashlight to keep them at bay until he escapes.
Gregory then reunites with Vanessa and Freddy in P&S, and she reveals that she suspects that the unknown figure has hijacked the Pizzaplex's systems, so she decides to do some hacking of her own. She attempts to use her credentials to create an override to link with Freddy's systems, while also looking for other ways to get Gregory out of the building. However, due to the virus' effect on the system, the override is partly corrupted, and is fragmented; she theorizes that the other animatronics could hold some data to help complete it. Gregory offers the possibility of retrieving the parts, but Vanessa initially refuses to let Gregory go out on his own. Gregory counters by recalling that Sun told him that a Fazcam or Fazblaster could help him defend himself; Vanessa reluctantly agrees, telling him that Chica kept some in her room, which Gregory retrieves. Pointing out different ways Gregory could escape, Vanessa guides him to a fire escape in the toy shop, but it is blocked off by Roxy. She guides him to another in the cargo bay just past the café, but the controls experience a malfunction, which alerts Chica. Gregory evades her as he finds himself in the kitchen, and he finds a terminal to control a STAFF bot to make a pizza and place it in the path of the garbage compactor to lure Chica into eating it. Gregory activates the compactor and pushes Chica in the way of it, damaging her, but she grabs him as she is pushed into the trash chute, with them falling into the landfill in the building's sewers. There, Gregory finds generators to activate more crushers to lure Chica into and damage her with. Chica then collapses as she returns to her old self, and Gregory recalls Vanessa's earlier comment as well as schematics for special parts and systems for the other animatronics. Sorrowful of her actions, she gives Gregory her voice box after he mentions Vanessa's plan, and Gregory promises that he'll help her as he leaves, with Chica remaining in the sewers. Gregory narrowly evades a group of corrupted and hostile STAFF bots (which are a threat rather than the docile security STAFF bots) and Moon as he returns to the Pizzaplex. Gregory tells Vanessa of these events, with him stopping by Fazerblast for extra protection. Gregory gives the voice box to Vanessa, integrating it into Freddy, and it proves her theory true, and that the override is now slightly more operable. This upgrade allows Freddy to use a vocal shock that allows him to disable voice-activated locks and stun other robots. Heading to find Monty, Gregory has Freddy use the voice blast to disable a lock that leads to a control booth to Chica's maze; Gregory arranges it to a dumbwaiter that elevates him to a scaffolding above Gator Golf. Monty confronts Gregory there, but Gregory's Fazblaster and Fazcam don't work on him due to his sunglasses; however, a glasses tipping taunt by Monty allows Gregory a brief instant to stun him. Using several air-powered softball cannons found above, Gregory stuns Monty, knocking him off the various suspended carts down onto the walkways. When Monty chases Gregory himself, Gregory uses the cannons to fill a splash bucket, with Monty smashing them to disable them. When Monty jumps over to a suspended scaffolding to catch his breath as he summons corrupted STAFF bots, Gregory uses a mechanism to lift the bucket and splash it onto Monty, causing him to fall and break in half; Gregory climbs down an activated emergency ladder down to Monty. The weakened Monty apologizes to Gregory, and after he's told that Gregory needs his claws, Monty lets him take them, saying that he can't trust himself with his own strength; Gregory also promises that he'll help him later. The claws upgraded to Freddy further strengthen the override, and allow Freddy to break through certain chain-link fences.
Vanessa has a plan to deal with Roxy, and has a STAFF bot head reprogrammed to be controlled by Vannessa remotely; she tells Gregory that there is a prototype race kart with a STAFF bot built into it as an automated security measure, but some components of the head are damaged, affecting the motor functions. Getting Freddy to slash through a fence leading to the temporarily out of service Dance Arcade, Gregory finds a repair station to fix it. While waiting, he sees and plays an arcade game, recalling an earlier remark from Roxy about the game's unusual presence; he plays as a princess facing shadow monsters, encountering a massive monster in the shape of a man, representing Glitchtrap, the soul of William. Unfortunately, the figure appears on the arcade's main screen, and seemingly awakens the source of the arcade's closure. Gregory is confronted by the DJ Music Man, a massive, spidery machine that acted as the DJ until it began to become unstable and destructive, and the Dance Arcade goes into lockdown when it detects the DJ becoming active. Gregory encounters a friendly, miniature toy-like robot resembling the original Music Man, who guides Gregory to several controls that open up the floor to a massive maintenance platform. The DJ chases Gregory around the Arcade until Gregory jumps down onto the platform, where the DJ situates itself in the center and tries to attack him. Gregory sneaks around to the controls for the automated machinery used to build it, and Gregory uses it to disassemble him by removing his central and hind arms while the mini Music Man distracts him, and he loses balance and falls over. Gregory tries to leave on an elevator, but the DJ attacks, though his attack results in a large screen and a massive set of speakers crashing down onto him, destroying him; with him inactive, the lockdown is lifted. Gregory parts with the Music Man, and heads to the raceway. At the raceway, Gregory manages to replace the prototype's head with the repaired and reprogrammed head, allowing Vanessa to control the race car. Gregory spots the figure, who lingers in front of another copy of the arcade game before disappearing. Gregory plays it, and sees even more unusual imagery as he does so. Gregory lures out Roxy by defacing an image of her, and stunning her with his equipment, Vanessa uses the car to ram into Roxy. When Roxy corners Gregory, Vanessa drives the car into her at full speed, slamming into her and sending her through a wall. Gregory climbs down into a storage space as Roxy briefly regains control of herself, and guiltily allows Gregory to take her x-ray enhanced eyes. She then loses control again, and blindly chases after Gregory as he gets her to smash through several wooden barriers to escape, starting a fire in the process. Gregory evades her as the fire sprinklers activate, causing her to short out and collapse. Regaining her senses, Roxy begs Gregory for his forgiveness, with Gregory doing so and promising that he will return for her as he climbs a vent back to the Pizzaplex. With all the upgrades, Freddy's override is completed, with the eyes allowing him to see through walls and view hidden items. As they prepare to leave, however, they are confronted in the main hall by Moon and a slew of corrupted STAFF bots, all under the figure's control. Despite this, Freddy's new eyes allows him to see Moon hiding in the dark, and he uses his upgrades to stun and incapacitate Moon, causing him to reboot, though Freddy quickly runs out of power doing so. With Freddy immobile and with little other choice, Vanessa locks Gregory in the lost and found - the figure, however, manages to break in and kidnap him. Sun helps get Freddy to a recharge station, and he and Vanessa decide to go to the Fazblaster arcade, where Gregory spotted an unusual room above the arena where it seems the figure is hiding out. While Freddy distracts the corrupted STAFF bots while Vanessa gets to the hideout, Gregory manages to break free of his bonds and uses a tool to take command of the robots, telling them to grab the figure. As the STAFF bots restrain her, Vanessa unmasks the figure; a shocked Vanessa explains that she is her coworker, Mary. Vanessa demands to know why she has been stalking them and taking over the building, also questioning if she is behind the disappearances. When Gregory sees an arcade machine of the unusual game in the hideout, Mary demands he get away from it; this causes the curious Gregory to reveal what he saw in the previous games, and proceeds to play it, opening a massive locked door in-game. The STAFF bots then return to normal, and Mary is briefly unresponsive as she regains consciousness.
Mary then reveals that her will was locked away in the game, explaining that she came across Glitchtrap when she was testing the VR game released by Fazbear Entertainment, and that she tried to erase it, but it managed to survive, taking a piece of her mind and putting it in the game's files, which she managed to transfer to the arcade game during a brief moment in lucidity before the presence developed a stronger influence on her mind. Gregory has the STAFF bots recover and bring the animatronics to Parts and Service, but they are missing; unseen to them, massive, tendril-like masses of wire and cables reach out from various openings and drag them away. They all head to the entrance, and the override works to open up the front gates, allowing Gregory to leave the building, where he is safe from the robots. Gregory reveals that he is actually homeless when questioned by Vanessa on his reason for being at the Pizzaplex. Mary says that she needs to undo what she's done, and Vanessa has Freddy stay with Gregory to keep an eye on him while she goes with Mary, who enters a hidden space in the sewers. She sorrowfully admits that she is the reason why multiple people have gone missing since, with her using select corrupted animatronics used by the temporary animatronic delivery system to abduct people. She took their lives, taking Remnants of their soul from them and using them to help the virus, which she helped evolve and transfer to the Pizzaplex system, allowing it to influence and corrupt various systems and machines. She doesn't know what it wants these soul Remnants for, but she knows that it gathered various pieces of hardware as well. They drop down a tunnel to find a mysterious elevator, hidden by Fazbear Entertainment. There they find the dilapidated remains of the final Fazbear management location. Mary, having hacked the most secure documents and emails of Fazbear's, states that she discovered that there was a weakening of the Earth's crust beneath the building, and Fazbear used demolitions to sink the building to cover it up; however, parts of the building survived, with her using it as a lair for the virus' plans, bringing it various robotic parts, as well as construction and energy equipment. They sneak past The Blob, a massive pile of melted endoskeleton parts powered by the remnants of the various victims as well as the remnants found within the formerly possessed robots of the past. They drop down into a damaged office space, and Glitchtrap watches them, enraged at the obstacle in his plans; deciding to finish things off before they can ruin things further, William downloads himself into a large robotic body with purple paint and parts, resembling his "Purple Guy'' persona. Upon his activation, a special message archived by Henry activates, made in anticipation of William's return; it briefly informs Mary and Vanessa of the past Fazbear's tried to suppress, informing of the need for him to be destroyed and wishing them luck. Purple Bot then takes command of the shattered Glamrock animatronics, with Vanessa and Mary working to keep them out while restoring and activating the incinerator systems to destroy the killer while evading the many arms of the Blob. The fires begin to consume the remains of the building, and Mary, to atone for her monstrous actions, remains to die; the Blob, briefly freed from his control, attacks William, destroying him and sending him back to hell while it and the spirits inside of it are laid to rest. With some hesitation, Vanessa manages to gather the Glamrock animatronics and escape back to the surface as the building collapses. At the Pizzaplex, Vanessa recounts what happened, and they all have the animatronics repaired and restored; Vanessa decides to adopt Gregory, and they regularly visit the robots at the Pizzaplex.
I have to say this is a great take on the story. It shows you care like so many things in this story and I'm glad Vanny got the spotlight, the animatronics turning good and no use of burntrap or the blob. Over all it's a good take. I'm glad I listened to this closely. Keep it up
Omg this rewrite is so wholesome dndjndkdnkdn. Also vanessa’s backstory reminded me of one of those stories that candy cadet from pizzeria simulator would tell. There was 5 children in 5 locked rooms, one child per room and a woman was given 5 keys, one for each room. She could only use one key to save one child while the rest died. Dhkdndkndkndknd really keeping with the vibes of fnaf!!
This is probably one of the best rewrites of security breach that tries to relatively keep in line with the original story. Admittedly I’m not a fan of William Afton being in it still, even if only being an AI, his run as the villain should be over. On your version of the story, the only part I’d change is replacing AI Afton with the spirit of the kid that Vanessa couldn’t save, who grew vengeful that they weren’t saved, so haunted Vanessa’s mind, orchestrating the murder of the children because, “If I had my life taken away at an early age, why can’t they?” In the VR segment, Greg is convincing the spirit that it was not Vanessa’s fault, which he eventually does, and the Spirit let’s go of Vanessa’s mind and passes on into the afterlife, forgiving Vanessa as she forgives herself.
THIS IS AMAZING!!! Oh my god, I loved how you rewrote this! It's definitely a lot better than the original! Coming from someone who adores FNaF SB as it is now, I am in love with this story you've come up with! Fantastic job!! ✨✨✨
I cannot tell you how excited o was when I saw the thumbnail. I love security breach but from looking at others videos I do realize it has its problems.
I love listening to stuff like this since it gives me more to listen too than music when drawing and gives me more perspective of how people have their ideas of the story of SB should be
I like that you admit that you're taking a few cues from MatPat rather than doing what the actual makers of the game did and chucking every story beat that MatPat predicted overboard.
Perhaps in a post-credit scene, we can see the abandoned Pizzaplex, with Music Man digging through the rubble to find the buried Pizza Place, there we find the lurking Blob, the Nightmarionne Staff Bots, the Bonnie carcass, a shady woman with pig tails, and Endos bowing to Burntrap. Setting up the sequel to Ruin. Otherwise good story.
You did a pretty great job with the rewrite. It's a lot more consistent, has a much more satisfying ending, and it gives all the characters more to do. Also that Roxy art is really good
When you revealed that Chica, Roxy, and Monty were turned back to good after removing the upgrades, I thought for sure that having 3 upgrades would override Freddy and turn him evil. "Superstaaaarrrrr"
I still rewatch this rewrite constantly, it’s just sooo good. As an animator I’d love to adapt this into an animated short film if you’d be fine with it because it’d so good.
38:31 "At least you still have your free will" To be more specific, she got her free will back lmfao It would have worked out even better if they all malfunctioned
Nice rewrite, I heard a theory about freddy and how he actually had Michael afton's soul in him and that's why he was friendly in the game and was not under control by William afton, what do you think about this theory?
@@TheArtisticAloubell I honestly think it's a good theory but for order for that to be true some of freddy's parts need to have some of Michael's soul attach to it and the only thing I can think of is the fun time animatronics that at the time were fussed to gather, removed his insides and turned him into a walking corpse when they left he's body some of his soul could have been still attached to the parts and some of the parts that wasn't in the blob could have been used in the new freddy at least that's how i think it could happen.
I personally would have prefered FNAF go in a direction where the concept of SB dosent work but for the kid freindly direction this is like 1000x better than the existing story
I think I found a good vice for Freddy, should he become evil like the other Glamrocks: he could be _possessive._ Much like how the other Glamrocks' vices can be seen as twisted exaggerations of some of their most prominent traits, usually reflected in their upgrades, Freddy's love and care for others (in this case, Gregory) could be seen as a possessive need to keep them. Inside of him, literally. It even may fit with somewhat animaliatic behavior, much like how it goes for Monty! The funny thing is, one other game actually already nailed this, and that game is Grizzly's. Like, it's pretty funny how that is.
here’s another take. Instead of staying one night like in the game….we stay five nights….but here’s another catch….instead of playing as Gregory on the other nights after the 1st one….we plays as a different kid on each night…..Each night we get a glimpse onto one of the Animatronics true personality outside of the virus….. 2nd night, Roxy. 3rd night, Chica 4th night, Monty. 5th night: Moon. Each night, the kid grows sympathy for their favorite animatronic….also more areas become accessible……also the animatronic becomes her/his guardian on each night and each night when we play as a different kid, the girl/boy develops a bond with the animatronic. Another thing each night, every arcade cabinet such as Chica’s Feeding Frenzy, The Arcade Cabinet in the Gator Golf, Balloon Boy world and the PQ Arcade Cabinets become playable. First you’d have to play one of the arcade cabinets for the next to be playable the next night.
This is a fantastic rewrite I LUV IT! My only issue would be this wouldn't be a suitable story for a horror game, but neither was Security Breach's normal story so I don't mind!
You're right lol I'm not much of a horror writer. I just wanted to address the story itself and make it more cohesive and satisfying X3 But thank you! ^_^
I really like your rewrite of the game! It does everything the game couldn't, like developing the characters, developing an actual story, and more. Fantastic job!
I think it would be cool to hear some "bad ends" or neutral ends for this storyline. Like what happens if Gregory fails to free Vanessa? It would be cool to do a small ending where Gregory is forced to help lure away children 🥲
Thank you for this. It sounds way better than what we got. It not only has structure but also fixed a lot of the plot holes that are in the original. You did a good job with it.
This was fantastic to listen along to, and right before Ruin drops hyped! =D I really liked you giving the other bandmates other than freddy more significance and Vanessa a more important role, Slay that afton, girl! SLAY xD. I'll admit you talking about the upgrades being the parts that corrupted them and them being taking out is how they become free (which is a great idea btw), i thought that freddy would soon be corrupted having all their parts now and greg along with rox chica and monty would have to take down a powered up Freddy under Vanny's control that would be a cool twist and role reversal. Nice that Freddy didnt get corrupted tho. Sweet ending! Thanks for this rewrite! Great Narrator voice, very chill hour listening to this! ^_^
While I feel the way Afton talked during the big moral scene was a bit, "kids show" esque, same with the sort of princess sword thing, this is a very solid rewrite all things considered!
XD Probably a bit cheesy, BUT I really wanted to work with that Princess Quest angle XD My fav show is MLP:FiM, so I guess the moral and dramatization comes from that kind of influence XD In any case, thank you so much for watching! I'm glad you enjoyed it!
I feel like Vanessa's sudden power surge felt abit too movie-esque for the story. I think she should be put back into the scenario of the game and then slowly defeat enemies again in order to warrant that final confrontation with William wearing the princess outfit. This making her slowly regain control and finally severing the last bit of control that Afton has on her. The whole pep talk and then her stop listening to him felt too immediate to me. The rest honestly sounded really great and i loved the happy ending. Kinda wanted Vanessa to be his adoptive mother though. Would've been sweet :D
I definitely understand what you mean. I was trying to make her transformation come off as dramatic, but I see how it can seem sudden X3 I was going for a "the power was within you the whole time" kind of thing haha But I'm glad you liked it overall
Someone needs to turn this into a movie👍 (AMAZING VIDEO I WATCHED TILL THE END AND I LOVE THIS (but it makes sense why security breach wasn't like this as a lot of it sounds like a movie))
Imagine you’re standing with your friends who you thought were friendly and nice and then they just start talking about brutally murdering a child in front of your face
Well, this is the complete opposite of what the original vision for FNaF 1 was. Although this is very nice, i still like the rewritten story of FNaF Security Breach where Gregory is a part of a gang of street rats, aka homeless orphans, then they disappear and Gregory searches for them in the Pizzaplex, Which he later finds their spirits, which also show their corpses. With Freddy chomping a kid's brain Moon strangulating a kid to death Chica eating a kid in half Roxanne eating a kid's face Monty eating a kid's neck Yeah... dreadful.
REVIEW: I LOVED this, I so WISH this was the story. Over the half-aced story we got in Security Breach! I REALLY like how Vanny, and Vanessa where put in! Having Vanessa capture, and guard. And then Turing into Vanny was cool! And how later Vanny starts just popping out really trying to attack! I also loved the ending! This was also WAY darker than the real game which I LOVE! I could see this being a real horror game story. But I can't see the Security Breach story we got being a horror game story. Overall REALLY good. OFFER: I'm currently working on my own redesign for the game. I was wondering if you'd like to join! Also I'd rather have it uploaded on your channel, because you have more subs. I'd like more exposure, and I don't think my parents would like me doing a callob with someone. Please don't take this offer as a pity comment XD.
@@TheArtisticAloubell Thank you for responding I didn't think you would lol! I understand that people have tight schedules, and can't do stuff sometimes. And that is okay! Maybe I'll work on this as a solo project. Created in several parts! Then I can really shine. Maybe I'll do really good, maybe I'll do really bad. Who knows.
I find it kind of adorable and hilarious that all the decommissioned animatronics join team Gregory. It would completely kill any creepiness but I’m pretty sure we all know fnaf ain’t really scary anymore
Thanks! And I understand that XD I'm not a horror writer X'D I don't know how to write scary. I suppose it wasn't my intention with this either. I just wanted a coherent story XD
Just to clarify: this is not a video explaining the canon lore of Security Breach. This is MY version of the story. My goal was to expand Vanessa/Vanny's purpose and presence, give explanations to things that had none, let the other animatronics have more to do, and make a satisfying ending.
ALSO I'm saying this now, but I regret implying Bonnie used to be around. If I were to redo this, I would take Bonnie out of the story entirely since I didn't do anything with him, so mentioning him was pointless on my part.
Anyway, did you like the rewrite? XD
Yes! I'm still watching though
There's actually a theory that Monty ( I think i spelled his name right) was the one that killed Bonnie.
@@CB7368 Yeah, it could connect to Vanny taking the parts to make Burntrap.
@@megakittenex haha thanks for watching it all the way through! 😎
@@CB7368 yeah, I know that's implied in canon, but I didn't expand on it, so for my rewrite, I probably shouldn't have mentioned it at all lol. That's my bad!
If this rewrite doesnt reference the "have you ever heard of Among Us Gregory" i will be very dissapointed.
I'm sorry, I havent heard of that meme before DX
@@TheArtisticAloubell You poor thing
@@TheArtisticAloubell oh my god, how could we let this happen
@@TheArtisticAloubell ruclips.net/video/qLn4bbufLxQ/видео.html
Here you poor thing
@@TheArtisticAloubell Where have you been...
Its great that only William is back and only digitally. Shows how smart he was to make a back up and still made Micheal and Henry's sacrifice not in vain. In freeing the old spirits but Gregory and Freddy took out Glitchtrap's plan B.
It makes sense.
His own ego being what destroyed him.
He wanted to be immortal, but that digital facsimile turned out to be the tool of his own destruction
Still think it should just be Afton
Imagine if there was a split where you could do the canon way of dismantling the animatronics with Freddy getting mad and leaving, getting caught and turned by glitch trap or you could try and find a way to free them from glitch’s control, gaining more allies but Vanny deploys some last minute scrap backups using old parts and mixing them together to make horrible scary abominations that hunt Gregory ruthlessly.
Ooo! I like that idea! 😲✨
That would be cool, there's more than enough endos which could keep the freed animatronics at bay while leaving Gregory to have to find for himself.
I haven't finished the video yet but I was thinking something similar
Maybe make it branch three ways if you think Steel Wool could handle it, or at least three full ways but obviously you can sort of cross back and forth with each Animatronic if you wanna go part way for the lulz
1: The Hacked Route: Either ignore or fail to deal with the Animatronics. They will continue operating like normal, and you do not get access to their upgrades.
2: The Shatter Route: Break the Animatronics and get their upgrades. This would, like in the canon game, not give them back control, and they're hunting strategies change, usually inferior to when they weren't Shattered. And also turn Freddy into a super soldier lol. *Hopefully that doesn't backfire on you*
3: The Savior Route: Find a way to basically debug the Animatronics and remove Vanny's control over them, giving them back their free will. This takes them out of hunting Gregory completely and gives you a new ally. Using their upgrades however is a bit more work since you have them in four separate bodies instead of one.
The twist, like it seems could happen in this video, is that since Freddy just malfunctioned and went into Safe Mode rather than having his hack directly dealt with, the less control Vanny has over the others, the more she can exert over Freddy after 6 AM.
You could also backup this change by altering Gameplay based on the choice.
The four Glamrock animatronics have clear, obvious patterns that you could exploit, so just scrapping them is easy. But should you chose to save them, the scrap-tronics Vanny would use have much more erratic, spontaneous behaviors and more violent attacks, making them a greater challenge.
"So why does it feel like...I can?" I love that line, so merciless, such a queen Vanessa lol
😎✨
@@TheArtisticAloubell Fantastic video! I wish I wasn't so busy today so I could've watched it in one go but I still really enjoyed it! As buggy as SB is, I do think the open endedness of so many plot points allows for people to do so many different things with it. It's all so amazing! I especially liked that you made the other animatronics have more purpose, with the befriending and helping Gregory.
@@47ratsinahoodie thank you! I'm so glad you like how it turned out x3
MatPat originally had a theory (before SB came out) that Gregory would free the animatronics one by one and they would help you get through the pizzaplex. Such as Monty being the one to go through the cyclone gates, not Freddy with Monty's claws. So I combined what happened in canon and that theory x3
I'm definitely okay with SB being open ended to a point...just like how all of the FNAF games have a lot of room for interpretation. But SB just felt the most incomplete to me compared to the other games...idk. As the most technologically advanced game in the series, it somehow has a lot more unanswered questions haha
It really does feel like if given more time, the game would feel more complete.
@@TheArtisticAloubell Agreed, I would've loved to see how this could've turned out if they had more time to finalize everything
The story ending on a "Well done, superstar" just works to well, it's incredible.
When the game first hinted that you'd need to decommission the animatronics, I legit thought that it would be a choice and that if you did Freddy would eventually find it out understandable get angry. I was not the happiest when I learned that not only was decommissioning the other animatronics mandatory, but Freddy would never find out the truth. The story definitely needed improvement.
Extremely good rewrite, but I must ask why Sun didn't appear as much, considering his relation with Vanessa
Just like Vanessa, he was losing control of himself and so he was Moon for most of the time. He was mainly just lurking around the same as Vanny was. I could have mentioned him more =p
But I'm glad you liked! Thank you! 😁
Sun was only in the game for 5 minutes before Moon took over, but Gregory should have shed them to help him get out of the pizzaplex
33:38
If Gregory basically was in a villain arc he could attack Freddy and wipe his memory of the argument
haha that's true!
OMG THIS IS THE BEST REWRITE EVER! I’m so brought into tears of so much change in the plot and how the characters change as well honestly this is way better than the original writing I really wish this was in the game it would’ve made it so unique and interesting I’m glad that Vanessa redeemed herself and became a better person that’s character development right there! and the animatronics just excellent but besides that this gets a 100/10
Also your voice acting was amazing as well!
(Sorry for making this long :’))
No need to apologize! I like long comments X3
And thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed the rewrite! I like how it came out so I'm happy others are liking it!
@@TheArtisticAloubell the story could actually be like this if they didn't try to chunck in some parts of the game and gave it a longer time for preparing security breach
Petition for this to be the actual story of security breach
Also I like to think Gregory could also build a mini Bonnie so Freddy can have his bro back 😎
Aww thank you!
@@TheArtisticAloubellmaybe you can make a rewrite of Ruin continuing this? Introduce the Mimic and the other animatronics though a bit burned and all. Without memory or personality chips they would be very agressive and dangerous though It would be interested how Cassie would survive. Also for the Mimic being sealed could be: Vanessa and Gregory found out about the Mimic hiding underground and sealed him as they had no way to fight it off due to having no animatronics with them
Glamrock BonBon moment
Glamrock BonBon moment
I like the ending and all but, if this were to be official it would end the that series most likely. The true ending set more pathway for another game. Still like it!
Actually! I think my story does have potential to spin sequels because:
1.) Since Gregory is a tech genius, he's capable of making animatronics of his own when he gets older
2.) The VR game could have affected other people and so A.I. Afton could still be running around somewhere X3
Thank you so much for watching the whole video and commenting! ^0^
And I'm glad you liked it
This is a WONDERFUL rewrite!!
I love how it’s the upgrades that make them evil and when they get taken away they turn good!
Also when I got that part and realized that Freddy killed the kids too…. I was pretty sad about that ngl.. but it’s good storytelling so it’s all good
I wonder how the animatronics feel about being mini 🤔
Thank you!
Oh wow! I really love this rewrite! It explains a lot of the things that aren’t explained in the game like the how the animatronics were reprogrammed and how Gregory knew about the missing kids when it was never mentioned in the game until the player has the choice to leave or stay. It’s also nice to see the other animatronics help Gregory and be able to snap themselves out of William’s control as well instead of just having them hunt down Gregory without being able to help them return to being Freddy’s friends and leaving them behind. The ending you wrote is also much more satisfying since William is defeated and Vanessa is able to break out of his control with lots of details about how the VR mind control works and how Gregory helped Vanessa regain control. Everyone gets a happy ending and it’s nice to see all of them live at Vanessa’s parents’ home. Great job!
EDIT: Adding on, I also liked how you gave Gregory more backstory with his foster family and how he’s tech savvy and street smart. It explains a lot about how he’s able to navigate the Pizzaplex as well as invent stuff and mess with the technology there and animatronics. Again, so many good details and ideas
Aww thank you so much for your kind words! ^0^ I'm glad you liked how the rewrite came out X3
I'm usually okay with the vagueness of FNAF as the hidden mini games and other details allow people to piece together the story. But Security Breach...idk...something just feels so incomplete about it...as if even the developers didn't know what was happening. I feel like the game is missing a lot of relevant details that it'll never explain. So I figured I'd make something up and connect the dots lol
@@TheArtisticAloubell Yeah, mystery is nice and all, but the details that are missing felt important to know. All of the endings in the game don’t feel satisfying or complete and leaves a lot more questions and things unresolved. I guess they might have rushed the game a bit, so seeing you flesh out the story more is nice.
Princess Quest Ending: Who are you?
This rewrite: I'm you, but *better*
Super freaking awesome. I really enjoyed hearing your retelling of Security Breach, and it's satisfying to see that Vanessa, Vanny and Afton had a lot more presence. The liar reveal between Gregory and Freddy was a good addition (I wanted to see Freddy addressing the decommissions of the animatronics haha).
Awesome artwork too.
Also, the Blob was completely wiped out from this story lol.
Thank you! X3 to I'm glad you liked it! 😁
And yes no blob haha. I wanted to keep things simple x3
@@TheArtisticAloubell Thano’s Snap.
Thanos Snap.
That ending made me smile, definitely the best rewrite for anything I’ve ever seen
Aww thank you
Let’s go FINALLY someone is fixing this game
Unfortunately, I can't fix the bugs, but hopefully I can do the story justice! Lol
@@TheArtisticAloubell 10 months and 2 major patches later, Steel Wool still hasn't stopped players from breaking the game.
50:21
I loved this rewrite! You did such a great job with the timing. You didnt make anything change too fast or slow. You gave the characters actual development and so on.
All im going to say is, you did a spectacular job with this rewrite.
Yay! You get a cookie 🍪🍪 Good looking out!
That ending was so fricking adorable aaaAAaAAAAAA-
I honestly felt more invested in this rewrite when compared to what happened in canon.This also gave a lot more explanation of what had happened,which is something the original lacked
Thank you
This is legit my favorite rewrite of the story cause it ties up loose ends, has consistency, and has some funny moments
Thank you
I think this video really satisfied a need for a well-rounded story and by combining elements of the endings too! Bravo, I'm considering it my new favorite fanon take. Great art as well, I can really tell you put lots of effort into this rewrite :) /gen
Thank you so much!
Okay, First thing: This works for a movie more than a game, wich doesn't change the fact it's amazing.
Second thing: Can we be sure Glitchtrap is gone? I mean after all, as he says: "I Always Come Back". Plus, since this story suggests Vanessa is Tape Girl, There is still the Beta Tester we play as in Help Wanted, not forgetting about the fact we don't know if Jeremy is actually dead.
Aww thank you!
This did a really good job of tying in canon, but still telling a unique story in the franchise.
My only complaint is that Music Man and the Wet Floor Sign bots were left behind.
Thank you! ^_^
But I had to keep the story concise, so some cuts had to be made DX My apologies!
@@TheArtisticAloubell It’s fine, they can find his remains in the DLC.)
This is seriously a good rewrite. It adds a lot more personality and dynamics between the animatronics, which we don’t really get to see. Yes, they have a ton of personality, which I love, but they don’t really talk TO each other, and just talk to Gregory as they’re hunting him. Also, I love the liar revealed thing between Gregory and Freddy, when Freddy finds out what Gregory’s done to his friends, and he doesn’t just brush it off. That was honestly what I was expecting in the game, to add some nice drama and emotion, but alas, that never happened. And FINALLY, we get a backstory for what Gregory’s doing at the Pizzaplex in the first place, and why Freddy suddenly went haywire, because Gregory’s invention made him malfunction. And there are a lot more emotional ties, because now, a lot of Gregory’s friends are the kids that went missing, giving him more of a reason to explore and investigate. It’s also super interesting to see a CHILD investigating all the crazy stuff instead of an adult, I.e. Michael. Giving Gregory more of a chance to use his wits and technological expertise, despite how young he is. But still having some vulnerable moments, too, such as when the other Glamrock animatronics, now being without their upgrades that MADE them turn evil, comforting him when he was distraught about his previous emotional heartbreak moment with Freddy.
Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it
What in the world this was so good?? Like I'm actually emotional over this, awesome rewrite!
Thank you
Honestly, I’d much rather have the FNaF series end at FFPS and UCN for the ending it gives is amazing. But if the series had to continue, I like your version a lot more! :D
Edit; 26:02 *circus baby flashbacks* extra points if it’s ice cream cake Freddy’s carrying
Man.. The thing I love about hearing fanon before canon, Is that if written well, it's so much better than the canon. I love your creativity and detail in the story and got so deeply invested that I was actually able to imagine if this were to be the real thing. (I used to be a fnaf fan back then but then switched my fandom interest to undertale and mlp, but decided to watch this video because you got great content and creativity) 🐱
Aww I'm so glad you liked my rewrite!
I liked the rewrite, are people allowed to apply it to their own universe for FNaF? It's really cool and, while I like the original story of SB, it gives a lot more explanation. Aside from that, this was a great video! I'm excited for the next.
You mean, apply my version to their own universe?
In any case, thank you! I'm glad you liked it ☺️
@UC2B57gg69keVJ1ORCbvSGbQ I think what you said is what I meant. Sorry if it sounds weird, I just really like the idea and was curious.
@@megakittenex if it follows really closely to my idea or my story, I'd prefer not. But if it's only inspired by it and takes bits and pieces, I don't mind 😁
@@TheArtisticAloubell I meant the second thing, lol-
@@megakittenex I'm confused now 😭🤣
I watched it all now and I LOVED it! It definitely feels like a satisfying ending to a beloved franchise.
🌟🌟🌟
Thank you 🥺 I'm so glad you liked it 💕💕💕
I love the rewrite! I think it made a lot of sense and over all had the best ending ever! Its like all of the endings combined together but even better! I really really love how your drawing came out too and also really love the rewrite so much! In my opinion this is one of the best rewrites i ever heard EVER
Thank you so much for the kind words! I'm so glad you liked it
Great rewrite! The dialogue was kind of odd and clunky at times, but other than that the actual structure and such are great!
14:33 Man, the animatronics are a lot more malevolent and open about it than in the original.
34:20 Way to rub it in, Monty.
34:50 It would be hilarious if, in an alternate version of this scene, she leans in and whispers "you took my fucking eyes".
37:28 Seems like Funtime Freddy got exorcised out of him.
39:22 DEATHROLL! WOO!
40:17 Hearing this line said out loud hurt me.
47:15 I like how you made them separate - it makes it easier to understand Malhare's situation from a lore perspective, while also letting Willy stay dead.
50:50 This feels _very_ anime.
57:23 I was _not_ expecting it to go there.
haha I'm glad that you enjoyed it overall
I swear this would be a lot better than sb turned out to be and just make ruin Cassie going into the burned down building being lured by the afton AI basically how it already plays out
Great video! It was a really good and satisfying ending, but, well.... we know Scott still have plans for other games so he always has to make the story "unfinished" every time, and how he never lets William Afton die it doesn't matter what he goes through, he always comes back.
Scott actually stepped away from FNAF. So any plot moving forward isn't decided by him. I see what you mean, though. All games have hidden lore to them that need to be discovered and I'm usually okay with that. Security Breach feels different than the other games. As of everything wasn't thought through all the way or that it's incomplete. That's why I went out of my way to connect the dots myself x3
Thank you for watching! And I'm glad you enjoyed the video ❤️❤️✨
Alternate title: fnaf sb if the trailers were accurate
This is such a sweet story omg. And that ending is wonderful. Great job!
Edit: I also like how this retelling doesn't even touch "The Blob" or Peepaw's charred remains like the base game does. It keeps all the closure from the first 6 games intact. Very nice touch :]
I'm glad you like it! Thank you
"Peepaw's charred remains" IM CRYING LOLLL😭🙏
I like this one, it doesn't feel like a cool version i wanted to see
Also, i like the fnaf books stories, you know when some normal person with some problems runs away, finds something related to Fazbear Entertainment, things go wild, scary, cursed, and may let the protagonist disturbed or with a horrible ending, i would liked if the game could follow that formula but it didn't, it felt more like a generic spooky game
I didnt even expect the other animatronics would get neutral
now I kinda.. love em
Id argue that in the daycare you should see vanny's eyes, not the suit or anything but the eyes only. this give the idea to the player that there is sabotage and someone playing with him as if he was pray.
This is my working on the plot, or at least how I would reframe it.
The game would begin with Gregory arriving at the Pizzaplex, with a brief intro showing the development of the Pizzaplex and the robots, and the mention of the mysterious disappearances. Gregory would watch the show as Freddy crashes upon spotting him. While Freddy recovers in his room, Gregory sneaks around as security guard Vanessa realizes that he is not registered. Finding Freddy's room, he meets Freddy, who offers to help him escape, though when they get past Vanessa in the maintenance tunnels, they arrive at the front gate as it closes. The other animatronics come out and meet Gregory, and they each play with Gregory as they show their respective areas, with Gregory solving a changing maze controlled by Chica, playing a match of mini-golf against Monty, and participating in an actual race with Roxy on the completed raceway. During their time together, while they are friendly, small bits of their character flaws slip out as the virus begins to affect them, such as Gregory catching Chica gorging herself after the maze and ashamedly hiding it, Monty snapping briefly after the match, and Roxy being a bit prickish to Gregory following the race, with the latter two apologizing afterwards.
Vanessa then finds Gregory, irritated while also worried and seemingly nervous for some reason. Freddy and the others manage to convince Vanessa that he'll be safe with them; while nervous, Vanessa is assured what with the presence of the other four able to protect him. They decide to set up a show just for Gregory, but just as they start, the three then come under the effects of the virus, activating the previously disabled security mode (mentioned later by Vanessa); Vanessa briefly spots a figure watching from afar. While Freddy holds off the others while taking some mild damage, he tells Vanessa to hide him in the Daycare while she looks for the figure, where Gregory meets Sun; the playful Sun insists that the lights remain on no matter what. When the figure appears briefly and the lights are disabled, Sun begins to transform into Moon, telling Gregory to find the emergency generators to reset the Daycare power before turning. Gregory then avoids Moon (who fears Gregory's flashlight) as he traverses the jungle gym while starting the generators, using his flashlight to hold Moon back. When the lights are restored, Sun removes Gregory from the Daycare for his own safety, revealing his fearful knowledge of his other half. When Gregory reveals what is happening with the other robots, he tells Gregory that he can hide in the main security station overlooking the main hall, but must get a pass from a nearby security station to access it; he also reveals that most of the other bots have a weakness to bright lights as well, and mentions that he can use either a Fazcam or a Fazblaster to defend himself.
After taking a shortcut through the tunnels, Gregory narrowly evades the three while he finds the office and holds them off while Vanessa works to remove the lockdown. Finding and entering the main security station, the figure then appears on the screens, and she seemingly sounds an alarm that alerts the bots to his presence. Vanessa realizes that the system has been hacked, so she decides to use her skills to hack it back, sealing the doors. However, the animatronics attempt to break in, and Freddy establishes contact with Gregory, telling him to use the electric shock systems to keep them back from the doors while searching for Freddy on the monitors and opening several doors on a path leading to the room beneath the station. Freddy saves Gregory, and the two decide to head to the Parts and Service area to repair his damage. Gregory briefly heads to the control booth for the stage to activate the stage lift, with them both heading down to Parts and Service. However, as the power briefly dips, Moon appears and attacks, taking Freddy to the repair station. Separated, Gregory finds the entrance to Parts and Service, but he requires another security pass. Vanessa tells him that a pass would likely be in the endoskeleton development area, and Gregory enters to find it. However, the seemingly docile endos then activate on their own, and Gregory uses his flashlight to keep them at bay until he escapes.
Gregory then reunites with Vanessa and Freddy in P&S, and she reveals that she suspects that the unknown figure has hijacked the Pizzaplex's systems, so she decides to do some hacking of her own. She attempts to use her credentials to create an override to link with Freddy's systems, while also looking for other ways to get Gregory out of the building. However, due to the virus' effect on the system, the override is partly corrupted, and is fragmented; she theorizes that the other animatronics could hold some data to help complete it. Gregory offers the possibility of retrieving the parts, but Vanessa initially refuses to let Gregory go out on his own. Gregory counters by recalling that Sun told him that a Fazcam or Fazblaster could help him defend himself; Vanessa reluctantly agrees, telling him that Chica kept some in her room, which Gregory retrieves. Pointing out different ways Gregory could escape, Vanessa guides him to a fire escape in the toy shop, but it is blocked off by Roxy. She guides him to another in the cargo bay just past the café, but the controls experience a malfunction, which alerts Chica. Gregory evades her as he finds himself in the kitchen, and he finds a terminal to control a STAFF bot to make a pizza and place it in the path of the garbage compactor to lure Chica into eating it. Gregory activates the compactor and pushes Chica in the way of it, damaging her, but she grabs him as she is pushed into the trash chute, with them falling into the landfill in the building's sewers.
There, Gregory finds generators to activate more crushers to lure Chica into and damage her with. Chica then collapses as she returns to her old self, and Gregory recalls Vanessa's earlier comment as well as schematics for special parts and systems for the other animatronics. Sorrowful of her actions, she gives Gregory her voice box after he mentions Vanessa's plan, and Gregory promises that he'll help her as he leaves, with Chica remaining in the sewers. Gregory narrowly evades a group of corrupted and hostile STAFF bots (which are a threat rather than the docile security STAFF bots) and Moon as he returns to the Pizzaplex. Gregory tells Vanessa of these events, with him stopping by Fazerblast for extra protection. Gregory gives the voice box to Vanessa, integrating it into Freddy, and it proves her theory true, and that the override is now slightly more operable. This upgrade allows Freddy to use a vocal shock that allows him to disable voice-activated locks and stun other robots.
Heading to find Monty, Gregory has Freddy use the voice blast to disable a lock that leads to a control booth to Chica's maze; Gregory arranges it to a dumbwaiter that elevates him to a scaffolding above Gator Golf. Monty confronts Gregory there, but Gregory's Fazblaster and Fazcam don't work on him due to his sunglasses; however, a glasses tipping taunt by Monty allows Gregory a brief instant to stun him. Using several air-powered softball cannons found above, Gregory stuns Monty, knocking him off the various suspended carts down onto the walkways. When Monty chases Gregory himself, Gregory uses the cannons to fill a splash bucket, with Monty smashing them to disable them. When Monty jumps over to a suspended scaffolding to catch his breath as he summons corrupted STAFF bots, Gregory uses a mechanism to lift the bucket and splash it onto Monty, causing him to fall and break in half; Gregory climbs down an activated emergency ladder down to Monty. The weakened Monty apologizes to Gregory, and after he's told that Gregory needs his claws, Monty lets him take them, saying that he can't trust himself with his own strength; Gregory also promises that he'll help him later. The claws upgraded to Freddy further strengthen the override, and allow Freddy to break through certain chain-link fences.
Vanessa has a plan to deal with Roxy, and has a STAFF bot head reprogrammed to be controlled by Vannessa remotely; she tells Gregory that there is a prototype race kart with a STAFF bot built into it as an automated security measure, but some components of the head are damaged, affecting the motor functions. Getting Freddy to slash through a fence leading to the temporarily out of service Dance Arcade, Gregory finds a repair station to fix it. While waiting, he sees and plays an arcade game, recalling an earlier remark from Roxy about the game's unusual presence; he plays as a princess facing shadow monsters, encountering a massive monster in the shape of a man, representing Glitchtrap, the soul of William. Unfortunately, the figure appears on the arcade's main screen, and seemingly awakens the source of the arcade's closure. Gregory is confronted by the DJ Music Man, a massive, spidery machine that acted as the DJ until it began to become unstable and destructive, and the Dance Arcade goes into lockdown when it detects the DJ becoming active. Gregory encounters a friendly, miniature toy-like robot resembling the original Music Man, who guides Gregory to several controls that open up the floor to a massive maintenance platform. The DJ chases Gregory around the Arcade until Gregory jumps down onto the platform, where the DJ situates itself in the center and tries to attack him. Gregory sneaks around to the controls for the automated machinery used to build it, and Gregory uses it to disassemble him by removing his central and hind arms while the mini Music Man distracts him, and he loses balance and falls over. Gregory tries to leave on an elevator, but the DJ attacks, though his attack results in a large screen and a massive set of speakers crashing down onto him, destroying him; with him inactive, the lockdown is lifted. Gregory parts with the Music Man, and heads to the raceway.
At the raceway, Gregory manages to replace the prototype's head with the repaired and reprogrammed head, allowing Vanessa to control the race car. Gregory spots the figure, who lingers in front of another copy of the arcade game before disappearing. Gregory plays it, and sees even more unusual imagery as he does so. Gregory lures out Roxy by defacing an image of her, and stunning her with his equipment, Vanessa uses the car to ram into Roxy. When Roxy corners Gregory, Vanessa drives the car into her at full speed, slamming into her and sending her through a wall. Gregory climbs down into a storage space as Roxy briefly regains control of herself, and guiltily allows Gregory to take her x-ray enhanced eyes. She then loses control again, and blindly chases after Gregory as he gets her to smash through several wooden barriers to escape, starting a fire in the process. Gregory evades her as the fire sprinklers activate, causing her to short out and collapse. Regaining her senses, Roxy begs Gregory for his forgiveness, with Gregory doing so and promising that he will return for her as he climbs a vent back to the Pizzaplex.
With all the upgrades, Freddy's override is completed, with the eyes allowing him to see through walls and view hidden items. As they prepare to leave, however, they are confronted in the main hall by Moon and a slew of corrupted STAFF bots, all under the figure's control. Despite this, Freddy's new eyes allows him to see Moon hiding in the dark, and he uses his upgrades to stun and incapacitate Moon, causing him to reboot, though Freddy quickly runs out of power doing so. With Freddy immobile and with little other choice, Vanessa locks Gregory in the lost and found - the figure, however, manages to break in and kidnap him. Sun helps get Freddy to a recharge station, and he and Vanessa decide to go to the Fazblaster arcade, where Gregory spotted an unusual room above the arena where it seems the figure is hiding out. While Freddy distracts the corrupted STAFF bots while Vanessa gets to the hideout, Gregory manages to break free of his bonds and uses a tool to take command of the robots, telling them to grab the figure. As the STAFF bots restrain her, Vanessa unmasks the figure; a shocked Vanessa explains that she is her coworker, Mary. Vanessa demands to know why she has been stalking them and taking over the building, also questioning if she is behind the disappearances. When Gregory sees an arcade machine of the unusual game in the hideout, Mary demands he get away from it; this causes the curious Gregory to reveal what he saw in the previous games, and proceeds to play it, opening a massive locked door in-game. The STAFF bots then return to normal, and Mary is briefly unresponsive as she regains consciousness.
Mary then reveals that her will was locked away in the game, explaining that she came across Glitchtrap when she was testing the VR game released by Fazbear Entertainment, and that she tried to erase it, but it managed to survive, taking a piece of her mind and putting it in the game's files, which she managed to transfer to the arcade game during a brief moment in lucidity before the presence developed a stronger influence on her mind. Gregory has the STAFF bots recover and bring the animatronics to Parts and Service, but they are missing; unseen to them, massive, tendril-like masses of wire and cables reach out from various openings and drag them away. They all head to the entrance, and the override works to open up the front gates, allowing Gregory to leave the building, where he is safe from the robots. Gregory reveals that he is actually homeless when questioned by Vanessa on his reason for being at the Pizzaplex. Mary says that she needs to undo what she's done, and Vanessa has Freddy stay with Gregory to keep an eye on him while she goes with Mary, who enters a hidden space in the sewers. She sorrowfully admits that she is the reason why multiple people have gone missing since, with her using select corrupted animatronics used by the temporary animatronic delivery system to abduct people. She took their lives, taking Remnants of their soul from them and using them to help the virus, which she helped evolve and transfer to the Pizzaplex system, allowing it to influence and corrupt various systems and machines. She doesn't know what it wants these soul Remnants for, but she knows that it gathered various pieces of hardware as well. They drop down a tunnel to find a mysterious elevator, hidden by Fazbear Entertainment. There they find the dilapidated remains of the final Fazbear management location. Mary, having hacked the most secure documents and emails of Fazbear's, states that she discovered that there was a weakening of the Earth's crust beneath the building, and Fazbear used demolitions to sink the building to cover it up; however, parts of the building survived, with her using it as a lair for the virus' plans, bringing it various robotic parts, as well as construction and energy equipment. They sneak past The Blob, a massive pile of melted endoskeleton parts powered by the remnants of the various victims as well as the remnants found within the formerly possessed robots of the past.
They drop down into a damaged office space, and Glitchtrap watches them, enraged at the obstacle in his plans; deciding to finish things off before they can ruin things further, William downloads himself into a large robotic body with purple paint and parts, resembling his "Purple Guy'' persona. Upon his activation, a special message archived by Henry activates, made in anticipation of William's return; it briefly informs Mary and Vanessa of the past Fazbear's tried to suppress, informing of the need for him to be destroyed and wishing them luck. Purple Bot then takes command of the shattered Glamrock animatronics, with Vanessa and Mary working to keep them out while restoring and activating the incinerator systems to destroy the killer while evading the many arms of the Blob. The fires begin to consume the remains of the building, and Mary, to atone for her monstrous actions, remains to die; the Blob, briefly freed from his control, attacks William, destroying him and sending him back to hell while it and the spirits inside of it are laid to rest. With some hesitation, Vanessa manages to gather the Glamrock animatronics and escape back to the surface as the building collapses. At the Pizzaplex, Vanessa recounts what happened, and they all have the animatronics repaired and restored; Vanessa decides to adopt Gregory, and they regularly visit the robots at the Pizzaplex.
I have to say this is a great take on the story. It shows you care like so many things in this story and I'm glad Vanny got the spotlight, the animatronics turning good and no use of burntrap or the blob.
Over all it's a good take. I'm glad I listened to this closely. Keep it up
Thank you very much
@@TheArtisticAloubell you're most welcome
40:45 I laughed too the point that my dog was looking at me like I had a second head or something, the one sentence embodies fnaf so well!
XD
Omg this rewrite is so wholesome dndjndkdnkdn. Also vanessa’s backstory reminded me of one of those stories that candy cadet from pizzeria simulator would tell. There was 5 children in 5 locked rooms, one child per room and a woman was given 5 keys, one for each room. She could only use one key to save one child while the rest died. Dhkdndkndkndknd really keeping with the vibes of fnaf!!
Thank you
This is probably one of the best rewrites of security breach that tries to relatively keep in line with the original story. Admittedly I’m not a fan of William Afton being in it still, even if only being an AI, his run as the villain should be over. On your version of the story, the only part I’d change is replacing AI Afton with the spirit of the kid that Vanessa couldn’t save, who grew vengeful that they weren’t saved, so haunted Vanessa’s mind, orchestrating the murder of the children because, “If I had my life taken away at an early age, why can’t they?” In the VR segment, Greg is convincing the spirit that it was not Vanessa’s fault, which he eventually does, and the Spirit let’s go of Vanessa’s mind and passes on into the afterlife, forgiving Vanessa as she forgives herself.
Thank you! ❤️
I love this! I just found it and this is the most emotional rewrite I've seen so far! ❤❤❤
Aww thank you
"WE HAVE TO SAVE THE PRINCESS"
"I did not know Vanessa was royalty"
Such a great Himbo Freddy moment 😂
Definitely needs a battle against a possessed freddy since all of the pieces were corrupted.
THIS IS AMAZING!!! Oh my god, I loved how you rewrote this! It's definitely a lot better than the original! Coming from someone who adores FNaF SB as it is now, I am in love with this story you've come up with! Fantastic job!! ✨✨✨
Aww thank you so so much for the kind words! 💕💕 I'm glad you like how it came out! 😁
This was such a great rewrite! You did such a great job on this! ❤️❤️
Thank you so much
I cannot tell you how excited o was when I saw the thumbnail. I love security breach but from looking at others videos I do realize it has its problems.
I love listening to stuff like this since it gives me more to listen too than music when drawing and gives me more perspective of how people have their ideas of the story of SB should be
Thank you
You're welcome
This was such a satisfying story, I wish this *was* the canon lore
Thank you so much ❤️❤️❤️
I like that you admit that you're taking a few cues from MatPat rather than doing what the actual makers of the game did and chucking every story beat that MatPat predicted overboard.
I love this re-telling of the story! If it were a book, I'd read it
Aww thank you! ❤️❤️❤️
this... was actually cathartic in both the story sense and the out of lore sense, very well written
thank you
@@TheArtisticAloubell oh, of course. This was beautiful
I feel like this is what SB would have been if it was written as an animated tv show. It was super fun imagining this as a cartoon.
Thank you
Not gonna lie I'd rather this story made into a movie/series rather than a game, in which case i would absolutely binge it
Aww thanks! ^0^
Perhaps in a post-credit scene, we can see the abandoned Pizzaplex, with Music Man digging through the rubble to find the buried Pizza Place, there we find the lurking Blob, the Nightmarionne Staff Bots, the Bonnie carcass, a shady woman with pig tails, and Endos bowing to Burntrap. Setting up the sequel to Ruin.
Otherwise good story.
You did a pretty great job with the rewrite. It's a lot more consistent, has a much more satisfying ending, and it gives all the characters more to do. Also that Roxy art is really good
Wow, thank you!
When you revealed that Chica, Roxy, and Monty were turned back to good after removing the upgrades, I thought for sure that having 3 upgrades would override Freddy and turn him evil.
"Superstaaaarrrrr"
I still rewatch this rewrite constantly, it’s just sooo good. As an animator I’d love to adapt this into an animated short film if you’d be fine with it because it’d so good.
I'd be super cool with it if you decided to do that!
Just make sure to credit me and let me see the ending product X3
38:31
"At least you still have your free will"
To be more specific, she got her free will back lmfao
It would have worked out even better if they all malfunctioned
Although it did not feel a lot like a game, this was super enjoyable and good! I could see this working like an actual novel or something!
I'm not much of a game designer, but I'm pretty decent at storytelling! X3
thank you
Nice rewrite, I heard a theory about freddy and how he actually had Michael afton's soul in him and that's why he was friendly in the game and was not under control by William afton, what do you think about this theory?
Thanks! 😊🌟
That would certainly be an explanation for why he's different.
It would be lovely if the game implied that with clues lol
@@TheArtisticAloubell I honestly think it's a good theory but for order for that to be true some of freddy's parts need to have some of Michael's soul attach to it and the only thing I can think of is the fun time animatronics that at the time were fussed to gather, removed his insides and turned him into a walking corpse when they left he's body some of his soul could have been still attached to the parts and some of the parts that wasn't in the blob could have been used in the new freddy at least that's how i think it could happen.
@@TheArtisticAloubell like I said this is just a theory I've heard and this is the only way I can think of that could explain this theory.
I personally would have prefered FNAF go in a direction where the concept of SB dosent work but for the kid freindly direction this is like 1000x better than the existing story
Thank you
I think I found a good vice for Freddy, should he become evil like the other Glamrocks: he could be _possessive._ Much like how the other Glamrocks' vices can be seen as twisted exaggerations of some of their most prominent traits, usually reflected in their upgrades, Freddy's love and care for others (in this case, Gregory) could be seen as a possessive need to keep them. Inside of him, literally. It even may fit with somewhat animaliatic behavior, much like how it goes for Monty!
The funny thing is, one other game actually already nailed this, and that game is Grizzly's. Like, it's pretty funny how that is.
here’s another take.
Instead of staying one night like in the game….we stay five nights….but here’s another catch….instead of playing as Gregory on the other nights after the 1st one….we plays as a different kid on each night…..Each night we get a glimpse onto one of the Animatronics true personality outside of the virus…..
2nd night, Roxy.
3rd night, Chica
4th night, Monty.
5th night: Moon.
Each night, the kid grows sympathy for their favorite animatronic….also more areas become accessible……also the animatronic becomes her/his guardian on each night and each night when we play as a different kid, the girl/boy develops a bond with the animatronic.
Another thing each night, every arcade cabinet such as Chica’s Feeding Frenzy, The Arcade Cabinet in the Gator Golf, Balloon Boy world and the PQ Arcade Cabinets become playable. First you’d have to play one of the arcade cabinets for the next to be playable the next night.
yeah maybe they could have kept tire to the name of the game
*true
This is a fantastic rewrite I LUV IT! My only issue would be this wouldn't be a suitable story for a horror game, but neither was Security Breach's normal story so I don't mind!
You're right lol I'm not much of a horror writer. I just wanted to address the story itself and make it more cohesive and satisfying X3
But thank you! ^_^
"Gregory and Freddy are super confused about everything"
That's it.
That's security breach in a nutshell
I dont have much time to watch the video right now, but I can tell that this will be great!😄
It is pretty long lol
Thanks for the interest! ❤️
I love it! The story is better if Freddy finds out Gregory had lied to him and the others regained control after getting wrecked.
I really like your rewrite of the game! It does everything the game couldn't, like developing the characters, developing an actual story, and more. Fantastic job!
Thank you so much! ^_^ I'm glad you enjoyed it! ^0^
I wish we could remake the game with this plot instead of the lackluster one they had. Really good rewrite and I loved the happy ending!
Aww thank you so much
@@TheArtisticAloubell keep making the great content :D
I think it would be cool to hear some "bad ends" or neutral ends for this storyline. Like what happens if Gregory fails to free Vanessa? It would be cool to do a small ending where Gregory is forced to help lure away children 🥲
Thank you for this. It sounds way better than what we got. It not only has structure but also fixed a lot of the plot holes that are in the original. You did a good job with it.
Aww thank you! I'm glad you liked it
how can one person write a better story than an entire team of writers for a professional company-
thank you
This was fantastic to listen along to, and right before Ruin drops hyped! =D
I really liked you giving the other bandmates other than freddy more significance and Vanessa a more important role, Slay that afton, girl! SLAY xD.
I'll admit you talking about the upgrades being the parts that corrupted them and them being taking out is how they become free (which is a great idea btw), i thought that freddy would soon be corrupted having all their parts now and greg along with rox chica and monty would have to take down a powered up Freddy under Vanny's control that would be a cool twist and role reversal. Nice that Freddy didnt get corrupted tho. Sweet ending!
Thanks for this rewrite! Great Narrator voice, very chill hour listening to this! ^_^
Thank you so much for listening!
THAT. Was an amazing story! Not much more to say tbh, I just wanted to get this out. I'm blown away by what I just listened to.
Thank you so much! ^0^
38:15
Monty: How come it didn't work for the rest of us?
Gregory: No idea. But frankly, who cares?
MatPat: Me.
XD
I love this story. Finally a securaty breach story like because i havent play .
thank you
This rewrite is so, so, *so* much better than what we got.
Thank you!
Gragory and Vanessa now remind me of Mac and Frankie from Foster's Home for Imaginary friends.
Ooo! Cool comparison! ^0^
@@TheArtisticAloubellYou're very cool!
OMG THIS IS SO GOOD I WISH THIS WAS THE REAL FNAF SECURITY BREACH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Sorry for seeing this late i just found your channel)
THANK YOU SO MUCH
While I feel the way Afton talked during the big moral scene was a bit, "kids show" esque, same with the sort of princess sword thing, this is a very solid rewrite all things considered!
XD Probably a bit cheesy, BUT I really wanted to work with that Princess Quest angle XD
My fav show is MLP:FiM, so I guess the moral and dramatization comes from that kind of influence XD
In any case, thank you so much for watching! I'm glad you enjoyed it!
This rewritten story is so good
Thank you ❤️❤️
No Problem 😌
I feel like Vanessa's sudden power surge felt abit too movie-esque for the story. I think she should be put back into the scenario of the game and then slowly defeat enemies again in order to warrant that final confrontation with William wearing the princess outfit. This making her slowly regain control and finally severing the last bit of control that Afton has on her. The whole pep talk and then her stop listening to him felt too immediate to me.
The rest honestly sounded really great and i loved the happy ending. Kinda wanted Vanessa to be his adoptive mother though. Would've been sweet :D
I definitely understand what you mean. I was trying to make her transformation come off as dramatic, but I see how it can seem sudden X3 I was going for a "the power was within you the whole time" kind of thing haha
But I'm glad you liked it overall
I read this as William being the one who's wearing the dress and I mentally giggled /pos /lh
Someone needs to turn this into a movie👍
(AMAZING VIDEO I WATCHED TILL THE END AND I LOVE THIS (but it makes sense why security breach wasn't like this as a lot of it sounds like a movie))
THANK YOU
Imagine you’re standing with your friends who you thought were friendly and nice and then they just start talking about brutally murdering a child in front of your face
A typical day, really
XD
I feel so inspired 😢. OH MY GOD THIS IS SO FREAKING COOL I WANT TO REWRITE SB TOO!!
THANK YOU
Well this is ending is a lot less creepy, but it certainly does make sense. Almost a little too much sense…
XD
I'm not good at writing creepy or horror. BUT I'm glad it makes sense ^_^
finally the daycare attendant is more useful or atleast someone other than greg and fred aknowledge his existence
X3
Good job really enjoy it just joined the fnaf community.
Thank you so much! 🥰
And I'm glad you're enjoying FNAF! X3
Well, there could be more copies of the Freddy Fazbear Virtual Experience out there
Imagine beating security breach and seeing this in the middle of the screen:
Night 2
That would be great XD
You really want 4 (minimum) more nights of what we got in this game?
This story sounds so much better than what was presented in the actual game.
thank you X3
@@TheArtisticAloubell
You're welcome! 😁
Yo this is so underrated. Hopefully more people see this
Thank you for your kind words ❤️❤️🥺❤️
Well, this is the complete opposite of what the original vision for FNaF 1 was.
Although this is very nice, i still like the rewritten story of FNaF Security Breach where Gregory is a part of a gang of street rats, aka homeless orphans, then they disappear and Gregory searches for them in the Pizzaplex, Which he later finds their spirits, which also show their corpses.
With Freddy chomping a kid's brain
Moon strangulating a kid to death
Chica eating a kid in half
Roxanne eating a kid's face
Monty eating a kid's neck
Yeah... dreadful.
Understandable lol. I'm not a horror writer XD I just wanted a satisfying story tying up loose ends and giving Vanessa relevance X3
@@TheArtisticAloubell nahh dont worry mate
REVIEW: I LOVED this, I so WISH this was the story. Over the half-aced story we got in Security Breach! I REALLY like how Vanny, and Vanessa where put in! Having Vanessa capture, and guard. And then Turing into Vanny was cool! And how later Vanny starts just popping out really trying to attack! I also loved the ending! This was also WAY darker than the real game which I LOVE! I could see this being a real horror game story. But I can't see the Security Breach story we got being a horror game story. Overall REALLY good.
OFFER: I'm currently working on my own redesign for the game. I was wondering if you'd like to join! Also I'd rather have it uploaded on your channel, because you have more subs. I'd like more exposure, and I don't think my parents would like me doing a callob with someone. Please don't take this offer as a pity comment XD.
Thank you! I'm so glad you liked the rewrite!
@@TheArtisticAloubell Thank you for responding I didn't think you would lol! I understand that people have tight schedules, and can't do stuff sometimes. And that is okay! Maybe I'll work on this as a solo project. Created in several parts! Then I can really shine. Maybe I'll do really good, maybe I'll do really bad. Who knows.
I love how everyone lives a happily ever after. 😊
I find it kind of adorable and hilarious that all the decommissioned animatronics join team Gregory. It would completely kill any creepiness but I’m pretty sure we all know fnaf ain’t really scary anymore
Thanks!
And I understand that XD
I'm not a horror writer X'D I don't know how to write scary. I suppose it wasn't my intention with this either. I just wanted a coherent story XD