Wizard Fistfight: a song about wizards fighting with their fists
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 1 окт 2024
- A song about wizards fighting with their fists.
Stream Wizard Fistfight:
open.spotify.c...
/ wizard-fistfight-single
listen.tidal.c...
/ wizard-fistfight
Support my slop on Bandcamp. Or don't.
conepoem.bandc...
x.com/ConePoem
/ conepoem
Big thanks to my friends Gisselle, who did the thumbnail artwork, and Felix, who advised me about the song in general and is my personal hypeman.
Rhyming "arena" with "subpoena" is crazy. Magical flow.
I thought I was a genius, easily one of my favorite lines i've written
@@conepoem you broke the rules, no magic in this arena
My favorite one you’ve written is “take him to the pain store and buy him every single fucking item there”
The idea of insanely powerful wizards, able to cast spells strong enough to level cities, just having a fistfight is hysterical
Listen every now and then a wizard has to deal with being put into a huge zone of magical antimagic.
Its smart if their spells are able to crack the earth in twine
They ran out of spell slots
In theory it makes sense too. Wizards of equally monumental power would surely have protections against certain magics. This is simply the most direct method for this fight
It's sort of like Discworld's wizard battle problem, resolved in a different way. Instead of "not having fights" in order to not level mountains and cause dimensional rifts, they have fistfights
The whole guild is grooving to this one
relatable
Congratulations this is now my head canon For the name of his fan based
came for evil wizard and stayed for this
you did WHAT for an evil wizard ???
@@conepoem the evil wizard isn't the only one masturbating to wizard porn
@@conepoem oooooooohhh, that's why it's the Evil *Fucking* Wizard
@@conepoemfor 40 hours, if you'd believe it
@@conepoem the song and I didn't came like the fluid came I came like in the going or moving way.
headcanoning that the reason conepoem has so many wizard-based songs is that he's actually a wizard that has this as a side hobby
can you headcanon a real guy? can you please give me a girlfriend too
@@conepoem nope, but I can give you a pet canary!
@@conepoem i headcanon that you will find true love within 10-12 business days
@@conepoem no you get a boyfriend instead actually
@@conepoemAnd if you don’t get a said boyfriend and/or girlfriend within said business days, we will be happy to supply an apology turtle with an epic little wizard beard and an epic little wizard staff
Why did I get unironically invested in this fight?
Same lmao
fr
Because it’s an epic battle
That was literally the start of final battle of Jujutsu Kaisen
Gorlof told me privately that the only reason he was magically doping is the recent tragedy at the academy, sad to hear really.
yeah he went off the deep end after he lost his apprentice, really sad to see.
To be fair with the evil wizard epidemic raging can you really blame a wizard for falling to the darker side of alchemy?
Yeah, that fireball spell really caused some damage, sad.
The best bard in the lands has gifted us another tune
I can only assume from this song, and the previous, that wizards are weak to being pushed to the ground
trying to educate people before they take over. thank me when you're one of the survivors of the wizard uprising.
@@conepoemTurn the wizard Uprising into the wizard Downfalling
bre'er rabbit voice: "nooo please dont push me to the ground, im so powerless down here, i cant possibly utter my incantations face down in the dirt where you cant hear me and prepare"
@@memnun5615I don’t know what a “bre’er rabbit” is. But I think I know the voice you were talking about
Well, isn't anybody?
Rhyming "arena" with "subpoena" is almost as genius as the "buy everything at the pain store" line from Evil Fucking Wizard
As well as handguns and tandem
Gorlof sold me fent behind the tavern
cancel culture at it again 🙄
He sold me some too
me too
Gorlof would NEVER! and also controversial take Booloo was wrong about the arcane doping.
he sold me a bearded dragon, I have no idea what y'all are on about
The booloo twist was crazy, I thought figletar would win for sure
I was a big Figletar fan before the fight, and I'm honestly just really disappointed in him. I hope he'll be able to work past this.
Like figletar was being super gassed up to. Like he mastered all the magics, and took out the evil king. He even seemed to have a bit of an edge in the actual fist fight.
I like to image gorlof is the peasant from evil fucking wizard that became a wizard at the end
interesting theory
Relate to this to a spiritual level.
Nvm god damn it Booloo
@@medic3148 Oh booloo!
Tricked by bolo once again
Alright, will do
@@medic3148shit
the knuckle sandwhich line goes so hard after the "he's ready with a treat"
i swear these wizard songs are one of the best things to grace my ears
1:04 Shopping at the Pain Store?
OHHHH MAJOR CALLBACK
Truly one of the fistfights in all the village
I absolutely adore thine melodies, oh wise Cone Poem, as soon as I laid eyes upon this masterfully crafted piece I sent it through my orb to the sage who showed me "EVIL FUCKING WIZARD" for the first time.
At least this was better than those two soldiers who challenged each other to a magic duel. Both of them sat around for hours sifting through times and then failing to properly cast. It got so boring we all just left.
*WAKE UP HONEY, THE EVIL FUCKING WIZARD GUY HAS AGAIN POSTED YET ANOTHER MASTERPIECE!*
KNOW THE NAME OF CONE POEM!
@@rowan-eggSoon, all plains shalt know his glorious name
@@vendettawasd4516Arise, ye Cone Poem, ye dead, who yet live
I had my gold on "Neither can knock the other one down with their puny wizard fists." Blikest the Spikiest almost won all of my wages, I'm so grateful that the doping was revealed and I was able to still afford my wheels of cheese.
For some reason, I read "Neither can knock the other one down with their puny wizard fists." in a heavy Russian accent.
This is some 2000's newgrounds shit. I love it
It makes me think of ultimate showdown
@@eothorn3217 that's exactly what I was thinking lol
I FUCKING LOVE WIZARDROCK I SIMPLY MUST FETCH MY MAIDEN AND INFORM HER OF THE BARDS NEWEST PIECE
unwise to tell your maiden, for they swoon for bards such as myself
@@conepoem as a maiden, i confirm
@@colorbar.s leave your squire and let a talented bard court you, fair lady
@@conepoem And here, we have the graceful bard, seeking out the mate of a ferocious squire. His advances have been captured by our camera crew, now we wait for the response. Will the beautiful maiden fall for the illustrious bard? Or will the squire show his dominance by shooing off the challenger?
I knew from the start, I saw them doping through my wizard orb. I decided to stay out of betting, but it was still entertaining to watch the fools.
Odd choice to sing of Booloo fighting magic dopers with his ongoing suspension, and investigation, from WWE (Wizard Wrestling Entertainment) for brewing and using Potions of Strength.
this was about the throwdown back in the summer of '84, booloo was on TOP and everyone knew it.
@viloinvictus The claims that prompted the investigation are nothing but lies brought forth by the EVIL FUCKING WIZARD because he is afraid of Booloo's might and knowledge
better add allegedly before his wizard lawyers fireball you
like to creep around my home and act like a wizard. I don’t know why but I just enjoy doing this. Maybe it’s my way of dealing with stress or something but I just do it about once every week. Generally I’ll carry around a wand with a robe around me in a sort of crouch-walking position making wizard noises, then I’ll walk around my house and pick up various different “trinkets” and put them in my bag while saying stuff like “I’ll be having that” and laughing maniacally in my wizard voice (“trinkets” can include anything from shit I find on the ground to cutlery or other utensils), and then I pretend to be making evil wizard spells with them. The other day I was talking with my neighbours and they mentioned hearing weird noises like what I wrote about and I was just internally screaming the entire conversation. I’m 99% sure they don’t know it’s me but god that 1% chance is seriously weighing on my mind.
I'm gonna use this to help clean my room
I like your shoelaces!
New copypasta thanks
I like your shoelaces good sir!
saving this comment someone reply to this please so it shows up in my notifications
0:29 fire 🔥🔥
1:20 has a lyrics error o7
i noticed this when i watched it after uploading + scheduling it a few days ago, so i deleted it and uploaded a new one with the error fixed, guess i somehow messed it up 😭
Theres some really deep storytelling in this song, especially with the symbolism of the hat colors
Figeltars hat is blue, which reflects his focus on academia and magical theory, while Gorlofs is red, reflecting his aggression and physical power.
Where this gets really interesting however is the Grand Booloo, who wears a purple hat.
Now for those who dont know, purple is the combination of red and blue, in the same way Booloo is the combination of Figeltar and Gorlof, or the best of both worlds. It really shows that they only way they can truly succeed is if they come together to fight as a unit. It really brings a tear to my wizened old eyes.
I FREAKBOBING LOVE YPUR WIZZARD SONGS‼️
i freakbobing appreciate it
*The Return of the King*
the sun has gone down and the moon has come up, and long ago somebody left with the cup- wait wrong song
Whole time - WHOLE TIME - I'm thinking "Goddamn, this new Cake song is a BANGER!"
Did not even realize how CAKE like this was ringing in my brain until mentioned
Figletar definitely cast a healing spell on himself, and gorlof seemed to move a little too quickly. Thank goodness Booloo the divine called them out and protected the sanctity of wizard fistfights.
we NEED a song about greedy goblins
📝📝📝
You are 100% right, that would be incredible
Or, or, or (hear me out): a song about greedy goblin WIZARDS🤩🤩🤩
This comment reinforces harmful stereotypes about goblins smh my head, goblins aren't inherently greedy! So what if most of the goblins *YOU'VE* come across have killed traveling merchants for their gold, magical items, & trinkets? I know plenty of goblins who are talented craftsmen who create their own treasures. It just so *HAPPENS* that it's sometimes hard to find resources as a creative & they occasionally have to loot for materials
there should be a solo battle between goblin tribes for who gets the gold
There is a reason I always have Strength as my high stat. Just solely for the purpose of casting Fist. Don't need any other spell.
I love that the stock image implies that Figletar brought the evil king down in a fistfight.
the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny: wizard edition
this is the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny, good guys, bad guys and explosions as far as the eye can see and only one will survive I wonder who it will be? this is the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny!
This is the most 2007 RUclips thing I’ve seen since 2007. I love it
GodDAMN! This new Cake song is a BANGER! Them Wizards WENT the distance, y'all!
It really does sound like Going the Distance
+
As a long time supporter of Booloo the Divine, I truly lost my mind when he showed up and put them in their place. Figletar and Gorlof stans both stay losing.
this is the type of shit that should play on 102.3 wizard FM and i WILL die on this hill
I heard booloo came out of the tower recently, but to see him at the fight was suprising. Apparently his new spell is going to be a game changer
Very neil cicierega. I shall be subscribing.
Upon further investigation I see you actually have lemon demon knowledge so my comment is justified
This represents an evolution from the attack on the academy, where wizards have now trained in the ways of melee combat to fend off avenging peasants
This straight up has 'The Ultimate Showdown' Energy that I'm so fuckin' here for. I love it.
It also reminds of when I ran a Fist Mage using 3.5 D&D rules to cast from strength. Guy was yoked and solved most his problems with a fist and touch magic.
I love how you appear to have decided to make songs about wizards
just thought it would be a good followup, next one won't be about wizards.
@@conepoem Looking foward to It!
@@conepoemwhat about witches
@@justasmltwngir1732 my experience with witches is minimal, i understand not their ways
@conepoem thank you for taking into account making sure you are able to accurately represent groups in your songs. There are many witches I am acquainted with who are saddened by poor representation, especially considering we live in a wizardnormative kingdom where wizards can get away with magical tomfoolery without repercussion & witches are shamed for their brews & spells. I know of many who appreciate you shining a light upon this side of the wizarding community
The rules segment is such an earworm and I'm obsessed with the ridiculously funky bassline that comes in with the synth. Fantastic work once again.
This needs to become an entire wizard-related album
Close enough, welcome back CAKE
Hast sir cone poem dropped another banger?
i hope to please the king and his court with my humble tune
i mean this in the most wondrous way possible, this screams Lemon Demon or Weird Al to me and im so here for it.
Lemon Demon is one of my favorites, big inspiration.
I said this last time i saw you upload, but ill say it again, PLEASE KEEP MAKING MUSIC IK IM LATE BUT THESE BRING ME SO MUCH JOY
i don't ever plan to stop 🧙♂
reluctantly crouching at the starting line for this one
new wizard song just dropped
ooh where?
Cone poem you madman you’ve done it again
and i plan to keep on doing it
Vibes I'm picking up-
CAKE, He's Going the Distance
Neil Cicirega/Lemon Demon, Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny
Weird Al, Hardware Store
Dude this is unironically dope
I never knew that those wizard robes were for hiding their HUGE MUSCLES
This song has the same energy as The Ultimate Showdown.
Wish I could send this back to 2010. This would have blown our minds
This has "The Ultimate Showdown" vibes, love it.
Other mages after running out of mana; give up
Denken:
When you write the chorus and then realize you need to write the rest of the song
Believe it or not, I think I wrote the intro first lol
Call me a conspiracy peasant, but hear me out
The fact that booloo was able to stike both of them down easily, and his only line in song was "magic doping" made me believe that he was actually the one on doping. He magically gaslighted the narrator to say, that it was the other way around, while the ones accused of doping, havent even got the time to explain themselves. Plus the only evidence that booloo provided to his claims was a signle sentence, backed up by none actuall prove other than his word. That seem pretty dubious
15 seconds in. rhymed "arena" with "subpoena". tears running down my face, great work
A one shot we had, were me and my bud were insanely Powerfull wizards against the strongest wizard of time, we ended up just casting anti magic field and beating the shit out of him over the course of 10 rounds
My fellowship and I are jumping about to this. Truly splendid.
close enough welcome back ultimate showdown (of ultimate destiny)
WE EMBRACE THE MAGIC OF THE INDOMITABLE HUMAN SPIRIT WITH THIS ONE 🔥🔥🔥💪💪💪
This is my favorite song from Hamilton!
this channel is a bard documenting wizards with his songs
FUCK YEAH ANOTHER MAGICAL BANGER🗣️🗣️🗣️
now THIS is the ultimate showdown
Incredible sequel to Evil Fucking Wizard - tonally much more mellow but still an absolute bop with a great story. Booloo the divine the GOAT 🔥🔥🔥
This is the perfect mix of ERB Nerdiness and CAKE
THIS IS EXTRAVAGANT gonna listen to this way up in my tower while i concoct strange potions
I thank you, noble bard, for your humble writings of historical events.
I feel like I must clarify that later on figletar exposed that the magic potions he was under during the fight where in fact prescription for his injuries sustained during the fight against the evil king, then and again I do believe he should've disclosed that fact before the fight as they may have played a role in his performance
I was looking at the other videos on this channel and was less than surprised to see Lemon Demon content lol
This is why we need heavier potion control. Figletar is well known for mixing up his potions way high up in his tower, yet their security clearly was subpar to not cast “Detect Magic” on both contestants.
We need more wizards like Booloo.
Wizards fistfighting? That's just fairy tail.
This gives me major Cake vibes.
Lyrics have a He's Going the Distance flow.
that was the idea, actually. big inspiration from that song
Hope this blows up! It certainly deserves it because this was awesome! Very well-written :)
That guitar part during the first part of the first round is absolutely amazing and I can't help but think of something like Black Sabbath with it this is so awesome
I need to write some wizard metal
Sabbath has been my favorite band for 8 or 9 years (so, like, since i started listening to "real" music) and Iommi is probably my biggest inspiration
incredible
wizardcore is one of my favorite music genres, second only to industrial catholic bugcore
Got any industrial catholic bugcore recommendations? Or bugcore in general, I'm not picky
@@RatOfTheWoods honey I’m home is the only example I know sorry ❤️
This sounds like something Lemon Demon could have made 20 years ago, and that is absolutely a compliment
Close enough welcome back lemon demon
Seriously, you are mega talented and funny as hell
glad I was recommended this, it brightened my day
That's my goal, if I can make just a few people smile or laugh then it's worth it :)
Ah, brings me back to the Wizard Brawls of yore. Merlin was a legend in those tournaments
But that's just my 2000 year old ass speaking
in my opinion this one doesnt go AS hard as evil fucking wizard but i absolutely LOVE the bassline!!!!!
I think Booloo was just regular doping.
I mean that wasn't explicitly against the rules so..
Old lemon demon vibes
update:
visited channel page. Yup i was right. Anyway that's really cool
at 1:20 there is a mistake in the subtitles but other than that great video
ah shit i thought i fixed that. whatever haha
>joins the battle when both opponents are tired and heavily wounded
>detects magical doping but doesn’t even bother to say which side did it
>shows no proof that he isn’t using any magic doping
Guys… i think booloo might be a fraud
This has the energy of a song from the early 2000s Internet. I love it
Fun fact: there's actually is a song called Wizard Fight by a band called Weedeater (yes really) but sadly it doesn't have any lyrics. It sure sounds badass tho.
I really hope you keep making wizard shitposts songs. Just listened to Evil Fucking Wizard. This is like a Lemon Demon song if it was about wizards and I love it.
no wizard songs in the works, though i do have others in the works that are quite similar to Lemon Demon. it has been suggested that i make a wizard concept album, which may happen once i establish myself a bit more.
@@conepoem that would be absolutely incredible.
@@conepoem I would also be very interested in a Wizard Concept Album by you.
gorlof killed my adopted goblin child (i am an adventurer i adopted him from his loving home in the goblin mines) and I think that Gorlof should have been executed for losing tbh
Dude I was at this fight live, spent all 5 of my gold pieces my bet. Its very sad it turned out they were both taking mana pills.