Signs Your Boss is Intimidated by You (How to Deal With An Insecure Manager)
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- Опубликовано: 15 май 2024
- Signs Your Boss is Intimidated By You and How to Deal with a Threatened and Insecure Boss. Is your boss treating you differently from the rest, do you feel they are threatened by you? Insecure and jealous bosses prefer keeping competent employees under their thumb to maintain power and control. Here I share 6 signs that your boss is threatened or intimidated and how to deal with an insecure and jealous manager. The first thing this manager would try to do is to isolate you from your coworkers and colleagues at work. And to do so, they start speaking poorly of you to tarnish your reputation. They want you to come across as someone problematic, hence they use any circumstance or an opportunity to paint you as “the bad one”. A good and confident manager would never do that to anyone from their team.
Toxic Boss signs are easily recognized. And since a bad boss is still the top reason for employees to quit their jobs, it's important to know how toxic bosses affect on the work environment across organizations. If you've been been trying your best at your job but your boss is never supportive or encouraging chances are that your boss is indeed threatened by you. Maybe you used to get along but something has changed, and lately your boss is giving you a hard time. Nothing you do is ever good enough and you may already start questioning your work and your capabilities. For further information about a bad management, check out my Toxic Boss video series.
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Anyone who has worked for a toxic boss knows how they can impact all the aspects of your life! Your confidence, your self-esteem tend to go away. But not when you stop being afraid! Working in a constant state of fear is extremely damaging. Think of the worst which could happen to you at work? Getting fired! Which is nowhere as bad as turning into a walking zombie. Researcher who did studies on more than 3000 people, found out that employees who have managers with toxic traits are 60 percent more likely to suffer a heart attack or other life-threatening condition.
I am Marat from EMMOTION, myemmotion.com, Recruitment and Career Services Agency, look me up on LinkedIn. On this channel I train and coach you to ace your job interviews fast, to gain confidence as a professional and learn how to deal with corporate politics, being a better person yourself first.
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#toxicboss #badboss #EmmotionbyMarat #jealousboss #insecuremanager
What has been your experience in dealing with a jealous/insecure manager? Check out my Toxic Boss series in this playlist: ruclips.net/video/4TFkwsBA9Ws/видео.html
I am quitting my job tmrw, because of #4. I went from the top performer to someone who can’t do anything right. I was placed on a PIP on my day off without my boss even telling me, and my boss only did it because she knows it disqualifies me from a position in another department.
@@lavenderrbleu That’s so unprofessional, placing you on PIP can’t be done on your day off. It is supposed to be communicated/discussed with you immediately. You are making the right decision. When are you quitting?
Micromanagement, gaslighting my intelligence, devaluing, projecting oppression, ignoring my accomplishments and glorifying and praising other's acts who have accomplished far less than me for the company.
@@lavenderrbleu
O pi 99
This video is speaking my exact experience!
Bad bosses don't want competent employees, they want employees they can dominate.
A good boss will help you shine. A bad boss will keep you down. They are insecure.
Amen!!!
Absolutely
My last boss didn’t have a degree or anything remotely related to classes. Just “experience “ which in addition is optimal but he knows that his mismanagement is reaching the end because he’s been exposed!! It was cronyism that promoted him and it backfired lol. And his arrogance helped but eventually the tree will bear the fruit of incompetence….
So true
You deal with them by leaving them. It’s that simple. Life’s too short to not be appreciated and respected. Doesn’t matter your job title, doesn’t make you above anyone!
HEY! AMEN!!
Very true. So glad I finally left a not so good situation behind! 👍 nothing or no one is worth your dignity and respect 🙏🏽💯
I agree with you
Period!
That's exactly what my daughter did today. She also found herself another job already. Better opportunities and more pay. It's very sad how common this is. Blessings to all.
Toxic bosses drain the life out of you
Nothing but truth spoken here!
💯 Agreed 👍🏿
They can TRY.
Exactly!
It is also a temptation to bad mouth previous/currrent bosses during the process with other jobs
This is why I became a entrepreneur and work for myself- these toxic people ruin everything
Exactly...why are people so weak and spineless!? Make a choice and move on...simple as that!
😀
Too many narcissistic people around
Behavior like this used to be the exception, now it's the rule. I agree.
Watch out for that type if you ever partner up. Nightmare.
The biggest sign is they are always looking for ways to get you fired.
I had a boss very like this. After a year he began working to get me fired, write ups, "counselling". But thankfully HIS superiors were aware of my work and in the end, HE was fired.
same
You are incredibly lucky. Most management will stick up for each other and are in cahoots. So glad you had a good outcome 😊
Oh yeah~!
+ Miss Claire is 김보경 +
Awesome
I agree, if an employee keeps his ground clear from beginning by keeping people in loop and superiors aware, no one can fire anyone.
I and my boss had a confrontation. I asked him what he does not like about me: He said that he does not like that I always want to be perfect and to be star, that I try do so much. I don't really know where that came from. I never thought taking initiative and having attention to detail would be deemed as negative.
They are so childish 🤣🤣🤷🏾♀️
Same thing happened to me.
That’s so toxic!
Isn’t taking initiative the whole point? 😂
@@yazmeister93 her boss completely missed the memo, he didn't get it 🤣🤣🤣
My boss was exactly like this. I left the company and it was the best decision I've made.
How long did you work there for? It definitely takes courage to leave, I am so glad it has worked out very well for you!
Me too!
Faced with this very decision right now.
Me too i left and im so much happier now and healthy!
Well done .sometimes u have no choice even if it was your boss wish u leaving company 😊
I want to add something to #2. Sometimes the boss won’t ignore your feedback or suggestions but try to take credit for them without recognizing you as the originator. Protect your own intellectual property 🧠
Yup, that happened to my cousin. It even happened to me and I called it out
This happened to me when my boss took my idea and made it their own and got the credit. I left very soon after. I feel pitty for someone who uses others ideas to get ahead.
Yes. This happened frequently
or the boss will give the idea to another person to deal with instead of you
A good boss is sooo hard to find. Best to be your own ✅
I think my boss has realized I am too smart for the job and it annoyed him. I do the work fast and am secretely looking for new work and have another job
There is very little chance of reconciliation with such a person. Either they fire or you quit. Finally be glad to be out of this confidence crushing rut.
What companies don't understand is how much damage is done by management like this. Everyone is walking on eggshells. Co-operation and trust break down, which in turn affects the organisation's productivity. Projects take longer to deliver, tacit knowledge is lost when good employees resign and the company falls behind the competition or just becomes unprofitable.
Excellent points!
My manager is having sleepless nights because of me, she so threatened by my presence....I thought of leaving but the moment I discovered why she is picking on me, I decide Iam not going anywhere, I will see this to the end🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Exactly 💯
How did it go...more power to you dear ❤️
❤❤😂
Ignore them. Do alk what they are doing to you.
Me too! My manager started a few months after me, knew nothing. Spent the first months learning the job from me, then switched and became a toxic, rude and dismissive nightmare. I’m also one of the most liked and successful people at my firm.
Having a toxic boss will ruin your motivation and slowly, step by step, you will turn yourself into spiritless office coworker that barely can be seen in some corner in the office. Don’t try to prove your point and try to make someone be something that the person is not capable of. Pack your bags as soon as you notice any sign of jealousy etc. you should not be afraid of being great or should hide your talents for the sake of someone’s poor confidence. Grab that life and elegantly close that door. I’m rooting for you!
@danicajovanovic
You don’t have to run or pack your bags, why do you have tongo if you’ve been there for a long time just because of someone’s insecurities. No way!! I’m a nice guy, a good guy, but I’m the type that if you feel that way and I’m a great employee, and you try to get me fired, I will make your life miserable, and I don’t care if you’re the boss, on every little thing I will challenge you and o will humiliate you with class, and I know how to do that very well. If he or she has any sense they will back off, which is mostly what happens with me, it’s exactly what happened in this job I have now. If was a great employee, respectful, hard working and everything, with my mistakes too, nobody’s perfect, but mostly try to get along with everybody, but since I’m not the type that talks a lot, or gets cozy with with co-workers they tried to make my life miserable, and since they took that approach I then decided I was going to treat them the same way they treated me, thank God they got the message, now I think they’ve seen their not so nice ways and left me alone. So defend yourself, as long as your right, always speak up, that’s only way to get respect in this cold and cruel world.
@@anactaneustheeleventh2542 This is one of the best answers in this chain.
@@anactaneustheeleventh2542couldn't have put it any better myself. Exactly like me! 😂
My boss is exactly like this. I tried to be friendly with her and take her ideas as guidance but she became even nastier and way more controlling and disrespectful. I wanted to tell the general manager but she refuses to give me any emails or phone number of him. Tomorrow I'm quitting. Because no one and no job deserves us to endure disrespect and hatred.
What happened? I want to do the same
@@devadii24 i quit because right after, the work stress became more and more unsupportable and i discovered, despite her giving me wrong info, old files and talking nasty with me infront of my colleagues, she was giving me a technician's tasks and taking the design tasks for her self. I confronted her and she even started humiliating me so I went straight forward to the general manager. Fortunately i got his number from my friend she used to work for him. After this my boss got scared from me finding his contact directly and they called me back to work with them like 2 or 3 times but I refused because i no more had the confidence or the motivation to work with such person. Fortunately they gave me my money and I resigned.
@@uniqueh5203 good for you, I did the same a few weeks ago, no regrets
I don’t disagree nobody should be to be subject to being belittled or being treated as if there’s something wrong with you I’m going to the same thing at my job my STM Store manager is a very condescending and rude person
So she may be a narcissist. Women in leadership, only like that.
My boss tried to make me quit, he kept just wanting me out of the company. I couldn't take it anymore and left and thank god I did. Making more money and couldn't be happier with my team and the HR staff.
I am really happy to hear that! Best of luck!
@@myemmotion same like my boss..always want me to quit and she try everything that she can so that I am out of the company..and she managed to do that..now I am in 2 month notice..
you should have stayed and let him fire you so you would get benefits. you did him a faovr
@@jrme4216 it is ok..I already got another job that pay higher salary..thank god
These are some of the strategies they use...ostracized, gaslight, sabotage, keep you in the dark, obvious contempt towards you..ect,ect
I think it is naive to think by putting a lot effort to validate your boss’s authority could ever change an insecure manager’s mind. You will just get bullied more and more. It is time to walk away, competent individuals will never worry about jobs.
tried the friend thing, she wasn't having it. It is best to quietly leave and do it in a professional manner. Try to stay there till you got a new job and is already signed on and ready to work over there.
Thats exactly what they want. If you leave, they win.
@@KimberlySmith14 it's not a battle of if they win or loose if you stay there. It's not a game.
Agreed
@@KimberlySmith14 i win my peace
Exactly why I've left a job. Pathological hypocrisy and a narcissistic boss / manager. It's a no win situation.
My boss told me straight up that I think I'm better than her and cocky during an assesment meeting because I don't speak much and don't like casual talk.In addition to that, she extended my probation period and constantly looking micromanaging me at my job.I'm quitting my job as soon as I get another job opportunity. Wish me luck
Same thing happened to me. I walked out 😏
Good luck!
They also say, "if you dont hear from me you are doing a good job, keep doing it" while the wrong people still get promoted
yup!!
Bingo!
More importantly, why are corporates not getting rid of these types of people?
The Peter Principle, they can lie well, and show up as near perfect without admitting any mistakes or human error.
They can steal and no one will hold them accountable
Insecurity is a primary motivator of narcissism. The chaos and control are all coping mechanisms to keep their artificial reality from cracking. Becoming an obstacle to your best qualities gives them breathing room to outwork you without the same obstacles placed on themselves, which then feeds their ego that you are not as good as they are. Questioning any of these processes, no matter how obviously inefficient, is a punishable offense and they relish that opportunity to reprimand you for questioning said process.
That's a brilliant analysis which I completely agree with. As you said, these people are insecure and they would do anything so it would never show. Just in general, those who always expect others to feed their ego can be extremely insecure. Someone confident doesn't have these urges and needs.
Sometimes is not a narcissist, just a dumbass.
A toxic jealous boss will not change. Your efforts are usually are ignored or brushed aside.
That is exactly what I did, leave. You highlighted all the signs except one, paranoia. Once they know you are on to them and will not take their bullying, they try to be extra sugary and buy you gifts until the next time you get recognized by the company for being great! It is emotionally draining and you can’t win. You know your worth. Get out!
Dealt with this at my last job. My boss only got promoted bc he's friends with the VP and been there the longest out of the whole team. He was extremely unqualified, very incompetent and ignorant. He saw me as a threat bc I was completing my masters degree and could end up making more than him. A woman making more than him was a big no no. So he used a beef I had going on with two equally incompetent, ignorant employees to fire me. It was beyond fucked up, but since I've done nothing wrong, I didn't lose no sleep over it. I now got a better job, fully remote, and I get to work with a previous co worker who was also unfairly fired by this same boss. God is great ❤
I will never leave my job that I earned because of a boss who doesn’t want me there. That boss does not own the company and I understand that the boss can make it hard on you. I have the best attendance, performance and attitude on my team and my boss refuses to support me. Oh well, I earned my job so they gonna have to take it. Never leave your job unless they are about to fire you on your last write up or you are ready to leave. You cannot be a runner all your life just to make others happy. Every day you are there is causing them more pain than it is for you. Rub it in, outperform them.
Thanks. I just continue to be a rock star everyday regardless of my bad director. I was once told, shine so much that it will be hard not to be noticed and make sure to never stop learning. I wake up every morning, knock out everything thrown at me like a rock star and keep the mindset that if a company or boss wants to get rid of you, all you can do is be ready and accept the day it comes. At the end, I get the winning end cause I get to update my resume with all kinds of valuable information.
Wow this is great advice, I definitely needed this as I have to “meet” with my manipulative boss tomorrow.
@@ashleedingman1249 glad it helped you. Good luck!
I love this :)
This is bad advice, sounds like it came from your toxic boss who manipulates you. Get out while you still have your dignity. Bosses do boss shit.
@@larryg7752 So far it helped me cause I was going through a rough patch with said director and when I was on the way out, due to the skills obtained, I was hired to a 100% remote job within the same company in a different dept. doing tasks that are way less stressful. Been a year and loving it... plus my manager now provides me the chance to learn all skills within dept and giving me a leg up on the next promotions.... we'll see how that goes in April next year.
This is a tough dynamic to deal with. Once your boss recognizes that their skills are waning (most middle managers are unnecessary in today's businesses. They are just political stakes in the org) they will do these things. All of them.
Yes, it is absolutely a middle manager thing.
I seriously just had this experience, yesterday. It felt like she hired me just to demoralize me. Week 1, I noticed something weird about her. I asked her if she's having second thoughts about hiring me of course she says no. But she wld avoid me then later once she saw my capabilities and that I could take initiative, she changed. All of a sudden, if I was in the building I had to work right next to her. We were working on putting a new retail store together, from the ground up. So doors weren't open yet.. Im suppose to be a supervisor. All the other supervisors and managers are working with another team but I had to stay up under her for 8 hrs. If I even moved a hanger w/I she telling me, she wld tell me not to. and she'll talk down to me in front of people who are suppose to be working under me. I had a similar experience in the past, so I knew where this was going.I felt stifled so I left and I believe that that was the objective.
That did seem to be her goal. But why did she hire you in the first place?! Maybe she assumed you'd be "assisting" her without any initiative or without outshining her in terms of skills.
@@myemmotion Crazy managers make crazy decisions all the time. Asking why is like looking for the secret ingredient of a brown stew.
These comments with people in similar situations are so comforting to know I’m not alone in my experience with a toxic boss.
I genuinely feel like I am good at my job and I know everything I’m doing but my boss complains and picks on me all the time and makes me feel not good enough. Literally nothing can please and when she’s around I can’t seem to do anything right with her.
I'm going through this right now.
Just plan to leave.
@@ywaiming I did
Girl ypur not alone my boss just fired me for absolutely any crumbs she could scrap together. So she used attendance.
I am early in my career and have climbed the ladder quite quickly. I am 26, and when I get promoted I will be a manager. I have found that many of my supervisors/managers typically are toxic individuals and this spills into their work style. Often times they get intimidated by my ideas or do not give me credit. I always believe that everyone can succeed together, and I am a team player. I learned that this is not the case, and some people just have issues. As you mentioned, do not respond negatively as this empowers them and they will never take credit for their mistakes. Let your work speak for itself, and always do your best! That is enough unto itself!
Wisdom! Indeed.
I see the envy in my manager & coworkers but I don't care. When something
needs to be done or questioned in order for me to continue with my
execution of the job tasks, I still go to my manager for help showing him/her
that I'm there to do my job, best it, get my pay & go home! It burns them up
when I keep coming to them about other tasks.
My supervisor displays every one of these signs. She's so threatened by me it hurts her. She knows I out-qualify her and tries her best to undermine me. My boss loves me and raves about my work, which infuriates her more. She's on the warpath but knows to tread lightly because she knows I'm not afraid of her. I'm the only one not afraid of her actually and it kills her that she can't control me like the others. I'm working on leaving though but on my terms.
I had a coordinator/supervisor that was threatened by me..it was horrible. He would approach HR and ask if his attacks for the day would be OK or not.. he screwed himself going to HR, this toxic boss didn't get his contract renewed and got himself canned. I was so relieved when he was gone..then finally one by one everyone was relieved that he was gone.
#2 and #3 were just too obvious, he ignored me and avoided me but didn't waste a chance to attack me in front of others.The bonus sign is also SOOO true.Great video, thank you!
Attacking you in front of your colleagues just shows what an unprofessional manager he was/is.
And you are so welcome! :)
My manager does the same thing literally 5 months after working he said he was jealous of me when I first came there, because he thought the girl he likes would like me💀 and I could tell he still is. He would talk sh** Infront of people but when I act defensive he says he’ll never get mad at me lmaooo
@@denarius_morales7622 he is a straight clown
I had this as well. For the most part they have already decided the answer is your elimination from the workplace
The only real solution to all these problems is to get rich and be the boss. Until then you will always be at the mercy of a master.
Im dealing with 2 toxic bully bosses... They really do all these things ..i thought i was losing my mind because i dont understand why i was being treated like this. I did great at my job plenty of positive reviews and i was getting sabotaged for it. Now my hours are cut and im looking for another job.
Two of my old bosses were dating female employees. Those same female employees were also interested in me. My bosses soon started acting kind of weird around me.
Its one thing to get the girl if you're the boss but to get the girl without the job says you got some serious game.
Don’t ever date someone at work
You just explained my situation and my boss EXACTLY to the T. I've been Soo stressed out about this. She has clouded the upper boss. The upper boss compliments me all the time, she gets very jealous. I also noticed that he won't do it in front of her. She controls everything and all employees appear to be afraid of her. They are suck ups with her. I am not the type to earn respect or acknowledgement by sucking up. I earn my way. I always have but this is a first for me. She protects all the wrong people rather than the good ones . Very hypocritical and sneaky. The upper boss seems to be under her control as well. She sits at his desk, while he sits on the side chair 😂 God I feel so helpless!! Thank u for the advice. Gonna be a tough one! 🤯
We are in the same boat.
🤷🏾♂️
My supervisor gon get his .. one day or later
This sounds like my boss 😮
Hi, Im 27F - In my 8 years of working in this lifetime, only now did I come across a female boss who seems like she doesn’t like me. She’s not blatantly mean to me or anything but she treats me differently than others. I pride myself with my work ethic so I think it’s not that I’m underperforming or not delivering. All of my other higher ups express their praise at me but with her it’s just a different vibe… sometimes I even get ignored in the groupchat but she replies to other with those fun looking emojis, lol.
I’ve been pondering on this for a few weeks now and maybe a stranger’s perspective will help shed light to it. Thanks!
Yes! Me too. Exactly. It’s become very odd. Very weird vibe from her.
What is really discerning for me is when I sit in my bosses office discussing anything… as I look around her office and see motivational picture phrases of her direction and being a woman and a placard on her desk that says BOSS LADY. Actually it best describes herself. Because she is the most rude, insecure, toxic, un tactful person I’ve met. Clearly NOT a leader!
I can’t wait for my exit review!
Sounds like the general workplace MO... Good to have a strong internal validation base. Be aware so that your 'aura' doesn't shrink, due to toxic dynamics; since this can stifle your joy, pride and development. to become the best version of you. If you stay clear and build yourself, you can actually grow in some regards, in an abrasive, toxic environment. But don't fool yourself, everything has a price.
I personally have one foot out the door, I'm ready to jump ship any minute. I don't have anything lined up but I'm also at a place where the environment has been toxic.
Update: Looking at this video again, some of these signs were things that the owner and general manager did to me. They finally laid me off which was a blessing because I was ready to quit at any given moment even if I didn't have a job lined up.
There was this company I worked for, that told me I was going to have to take a cut in pay, because of the company budget;
Then about 3 weeks later, I resigned; Because I found a better paying job.
Then the manager asked me; How much was the new job paying? Then when I told him; He said they couldn't match it.
Then I said; Well, I'm just going where the money is. 😂✌
Intimidated and jealous already sounds quite bad, just a step behind a toxic boss.
Amazing advice. Your new videos are incredibly helpful!
I appreciate that!
Interesting. A boss that I worked for at a local authority up until about 20 years ago ticked all of the six points that you mentioned. He engendered a toxic atmosphere in the work place by treating people at the same grade differently and positively encouraging them to snitch, tittle tattle and back stab each other. It was reassuring for it to be confirmed that I experienced all of this because he was intimidated by me and wanted to crush my self confidence and not because I was crap at my job, which I knew I wasn't.
The next boss I had working at the same authority was the complete opposite. She thought I was brilliant at my job and said I didn't need managing and she could always rely on me to complete work on or ahead of time and deal competently with the more challenging tasks without compromising on quality or volume. The first boss got his come uppance during a reorganisation where he was made redundant by stealth. Needless to say I didn't get an invite to his leaving do. Happy days.
had a manager that wouldnt give me a promotion without a real explanation, even when i pulled up the job description with examples of me meeting all of the expectations. ended up taking my list to the director and got a promotion immediately. Well, that put a target on my back for my manager and he used every opportunity to ignore my opinions, criticize my work, remain rude and distant, ignore my PTO requests and refuse to give me a bonus, after receiving the promotion. I realized that I can take my work elsewhere and now I'm happy with a higher paying job with less stress.
Sounds to me this is like workplace bullying. My boss is well aware I know the legalities of this and she backs off.
Damn. This video was spot on. I've had tons of insecure professors and bosses before and you're right, you need to re-assure them in their leadership abilities. They want validation too.
Really appreciate this video, it's really painful learning these things in the corporate world. However it's so refreshing that I am not going crazy and there's a genuine reason for what I am seeing at work!
This is my situation right now. It's a relief to know it's not me. Thank You 🙏🏾
I think leaving is the best and working towards that
Always keep your distance
If the boss is supportive it will all flow naturally.
Omg, this is great content. It describes clearly the toxicity of some workplaces when an envious boss is around.
Exactly , my supervisor did that same thing to me. She would criticize in a mass text, but thank God I got another job, and now she would do anything for me to come back to work, but i work one day as relief. They hate when u speak up for yourself, they love when u suck up to them and be afraid of them.
Honestly many of those pointers felt relatable and gave me a clear insight, thank you
Great job! These tips are spot on and so validating. Thank you.
Thank you for this video. Each sign I am experiencing at my current position. I had a feeling my boss was threatened by my presence, but to recognize each of the signs you outlined, convinces me I was right. It helps me to deal with the attack and not let me internalize them.
So true. Everything he said is true. Point by point like so precise. Thank you for validating my opinion. Shared this video to my co-worker. Im subscribing🥰🥰🥰
#1,4, and 6 is what I experienced at my last job and then got fired after just one month... I had never experienced these things in my other two jobs and that is how I knew that something was wrong. I had a personal trainer, in which after two weeks she told me that I am ready to be on my own, and how she saw great potential in me etc. But when my boss would talk to me she would say that we need to have a few more days of training and that she doesn't feel confident in me to be on my own. Also, my office was next door to my boss' office and I am able to over hear her in her meetings. She had two meetings on two different occasions, both meetings specifically based on me. I can hear how the opposite person suggested something but before they could finish, my boss interrupted and said, "no no she doesn't have purpose as an individual" along with many other things... My boss would have one on one meetings with just me and her, and she told me that I need to be more interactive, I need to be more involved in the chats (we had chats which was something created early covid before I got hired and when the job switch to remote/hybrid. It was a form to stay socialized within the work place.) She told me I need to smile more and then gave the example of looking dead by referencing to herself, but I know she was indirectly telling me that I look dead. Mind you, within the group meetings, everyone takes a turn to say something based on the topic at hand, in which you could say that we are all forced to talk; although, I did not mind talking at all and did not hesitate to take the spotlight and speak when it was my turn. I enjoyed working there, I always said hi to the lady at the front desk and to the ladies I went to orientation with. Anyways, being that I was only in the training process (for the entire month), why was she so focused on how I looked and me sending a good morning text or a "going to lunch" gif in the chats, more than she was with the training or the actual work that I got hired for?
This was my first job in accounting field and the amount of excitement I had to get my first job after four years of college was very high. Although, because of what happened within that one month, now I question if accounting is for me....
thats how i felt about being something simple like a cashier. You should practice a bit more, regain your confidence and go back out there and find some real work accounting if that is what you want. Dont let people or thoughts in your head tell you otherwise. You go out there and conquer. Best of wishes to you. Shalom
I just got fired today after 1 month of work (2 weeks of training in a new field, 2weeks of work on my own).
I read your story and I can picture myself there. I was ignored, excluded of the team for 2 weeks. It’s been 1 month of pressure on my mental health… Im going to be short and just say that we had quite the same experience. Very sad. I never lived a situation like this before. I lost all my personality, confidence there…
Crazy just how spot on that is every word I've been going through this for 8 and 1/2 years at my company with three different GMs..
My boss telling me you work excellent and flawless. Then said I want to tell you something but don't get me wrong there is another job somewhere else for a manager role and I think it is tailored for you. We want you here of course but we can't be selfish. I was laughing inside hahahah. I ain't leaving
The fact that your boss is giving you feedback and acknowledges your talent is actually very positive. From the little you’ve shared, maybe he suggests this for this personal gain, but I wouldn’t call him a toxic boss. You shall read some of the stories here about really horrible managers to notice the difference.
That might have been your opportunity for a promotion.
I love just seeing the video is there and exists. We need to talk about threatened bosses and employees.
New sub😊
I’m so thankful I found your channel !
Thank you for helping the workforce.
Your words have been very helpful.
I personally like having male managers /supervisors because they don’t have jealousy like women do/ competition gossiping. I can say this from experience😢
this content is gold ! thank you
I love the way he talks
And how he express the ideas 😃
it’s very helpful
Omg thank you! 😭 This was my last manager to the T!! I tried to talk to them about it and all I got was empty promises to change and gaslighted. So glad I left.
Toxic bosses don't change
good on you that you left
You've done all the right steps. You've first tried your best to work things out and to improve communication between you. But as you've mentioned things only got further and worse. I hope your current work environment is good and that it stays this way. Always happy to see you around!
@@positivethinking4464 You are right, the toxic ones won't change.
Thanks for sharing Marat, you hit a nail on the head again. If your boss is toxic even when you try to acknowledge their authority and affirm your intention to help the team and support them, you have no choice but go to another job, you boss is so happy to see you go voluntarily. If you need to apply for another job in the future, could you ask them to be your referee? Would you think after you leave and you ask for their favour, they would do it for you? I appreciate your advice. Many thanks Marat.
There are additional and different signs as well. It will vary based on their own personality/character traits. Agression and vindictiveness will vary too. Usually when your gut is telling you something is up, something is up. If you have reached the end of your rope and have nothing to lose, its time to go over their head and attempt to initiate an alternate narrative for the situation. It might be the last thing you do but it can lead to changes and improvements for others down the road. And thats a positive effect on the universe.
Wow. Exactly. My colleagues don't talk to me. My boss throws any good thing I try to do away immediately! This includes an Incident Report folder which we still don't have - despite someone who fell on company grounds and was injured. She's very toxic.
I am sorry you are experiencing this. Sometimes it's a set up within the company which has been created by toxic leadership and it's impossible to make any change.
Merry Christmas btw!
Hire a lawyer if you have a brain
Validating false authority over yourself isn't how to deal with this type of issue. All you do is embolden the person to continue to take cheap shots at you, making them respect you even less than they did before.
Regarding high-value individuals:
I think that many of the examples given in the video (them not letting you communicate with upper management etc) are spot on. The level of pettiness that some of these middle managers will display is truly, truly astounding as a result of their own deep insecurities/envy.
High-value, high-performance individuals don't need to play political games with management. Of all things one could do, you cannot respond in kind, because you'll only damage yourself, lowering yourself to their level, to their puerile behavior.
Continued professionalism, continued results are the way to go. Sustained professional behavior forces the nasty employee(s) to play at your level, and this is precisely what you want, every single day when you step into the office.
If upper management largely responds in the same manner as the lower level boss, it's likely systemic, and it's time to go.
My goodness, every word you say is spot on!
Thanks for clarifying this.. I know I’m good at my job and for a long time I do feel that I am a threat to my boss and my other code worker.. I was getting stressed by just feeling like it wasn’t ok for me ask questions that was already answered in past. But hearing you says this just encourages me to keep going. Knowing she’s feels threatened by me. It no longer makes me doubt myself. Because she was making me doubt myself. Which i feel deep inside i did nothing wrong by just questioning her on certain things i want to know more or again. Thank you
Thank you!!! Your videos are so helpful right now.
Spot on, I feel like I am losing my mind.
Mine wouldn't even make eye contact. Go figure!
You are clearly not on their favorites list!
@@myemmotion I did not go back after the pandemic. I heard the next one quit after 2 months. LOL!
@@amandatarkington6877 Let's see how long it will take for the company to finally realize how problematic this person is!
@@myemmotion Do big companies that have bad management ever get their karma by going out of business? Cuz it seems like all big companies ever do is escape accountability, blame the victims, and then hire new employees. Do companies with high turnover rates just keep raking in the money indefinitely or do they ever finally implode and go out of business?
Thank you, sir. This gives me clarity.
Thank you so very much... I am learning a lot about this currently & this was a clear explanation explaining what has been very confusing
Great series of videos, help those isolated know what they need to do.
I like the tips at the end of the video. My boss is very insecure and many of my good achievements have been brushed under the table. The atmosphere at work is tense and she complains about us almost constantly. I am heading for a review and if I can just get her to give more responsibility to the rest of us I think it will help. Time to try buttering her ego or I think a lot of us will walk. Many thanks
That never works with these people. Butter them up and they take it as an approval of their garbage leadership skills.
I'm dealing with this kind of boss by now. Every signs you mentioned, I find them all in my boss.
Thanks for the eye opener
You are very welcome!
Thank you, JUst what I needed to hear tonight , I suppose sending one's boss the link to this video wound not generally be advised.
Aww this is making crying it is exact what happened to me from my boss. With you advice I can confirm that I am doing the right thing, I appreciate you
I've just sent a resignation letter telling him of his manipulative tactics and told him straight after asking me to stay.. I told him I don't associate with behaviour that is a detriment to another and his company is a liability
It feels like you are talking about my EXPERIENCE.
Found it very helpful. Thank you so much
This Dude has discribed my entire work experiance to date.
No!!! Don’t give them any space for them to feel power over you, you don’t have to take their bs. It’s that simple, yes be respectful, don’t take the bait, but if you feel you’re being disrespected , or even being outright bullies to you, you don’t have to go take that. You don’t!!! If you’ve taken that approach and you feel that your boss has overcome that mindset of theirs towards you, then you’ve done well. But if their constantly trying bully you and discredit you and mistreat you, you tell them right away, cause this about your health and your well being, guess what, they don’t care about how you feel. They’ll make your life miserable and then go to their homes like nothings happened, no way. Speak up for yourself, don’t be disrespectful, but learn how to destroy them with class, cause some of them actually need a lesson in class, most of them anyway. You don’t have to acknowledge anything, yes you have to do the work they’re paying you for, but you’re not their slave. A lot of what he’s saying could work if these people were decent enough to acknowledge great employees. And that’s the keyword here , “employees” employers need employees to make money, not the other way around. We make these people the money they get, a company a business is nothing without great employees. Is that simple, without us they’re nothing, absolutely nothing, and it really bothers me that these people actually have the nerve to treat the people who makes them money like crap. It’s ridiculous, now it’s true there are some really bad and no good employees out there, but for the most part people actually want to keep working because if they don’t they don’t get paid, and people like getting paid. Some of what he’s saying sounds good but most of the time it will backfire, because most of these people are scum and I know what I’m talking about, life is much too short to be enduring stupid people, so if you feel like you’re being bullied at work, mistreated and even humiliated at work, it’s probably because you have let it.
Agreed. There's no reasoning with a toxic, narcissistic boss. Keep communication at a minimum, continue to do your work, and look for better opportunities to leave. Dealt with this in the past, and it never ends well. Best to cut your "losses" (I put that in quotes bc is leaving a toxic situation for a better one really a "loss"), and move on. Life is too short to be dealing with this crap. It's time as employees to take our power back. Bc as you stated, these employers are NOTHING without the great work from the employees.
Best part was at the end...very soloution oriented. I like that. 😊
Very helpful! Thank you!
Awesome video! I discovered your channel because of your toxic boss video so for me there was no way to end well with my ex manager who was an a**hole
I am really glad you've subscribed and have been so supportive, I really appreciate each of your comments and feedback!
This was confirmation for me. Everything you said is completely true.
Bro is right on point this is what is happening to me at work...
This is happening to me right now. I've been at my job for 6 years and I loved it here. My old boss retired and the new one is being like this. IDK y'all.
Never outshine the Master.
Unless the master is an ahole. If so do your work to the best and get out
I remember my old boss used to Trimble when I stood close to him. For example, he would show me something on his computer. When I leaned over to look closer at the screen, his body would start shaking. I always thought that was kind of odd.
If he's an old boss it might be Parkinson's
My gosh you hit the nail on the head
Ok so thanks for that, I needed it! Everything you said is exactly what I have dealt with up until yesterday. My boss did all those things and it came to an end yesterday when he pushed me onto the ground and slapped me across the face for saying I’m done with his shit! At least next time I will notice the signs before a get assaulted 🤷🏻♂️ thanks again ✌🏻
Whaaaat? That’s assault. He should be arrested and fired immediately. Sorry you had to go through that. He sounds insane.
Yes he should be 100% and it wasn’t an employee it was the owner of the business. I am still thinking about pressing charges because this is the first time he has done it to me but the third time he has got physical with an employee. It’s just a hard call for me as I don’t like drama and live a simple routine life, however he deserves to be locked up and his business shut down! Thanks for the kind words