This is why Chris Voss still continues to be my favorite negotiators. The years of experience, details, and nuance can't be read from a book. Student for life over here!
*NEGOTIATOR's REAL WORLD HIGH STAKES CHALLENGE* *What can be done when a hostile person is already angry & threatening bodily injury directly at you, there is no escape possible, and you have seconds to influence the outcome of the situation?* *Or is all this only good for business negotiations and hostages?*
Its time for employment benefits to renew. Corporate greed has motioned to sunset our pension and sub in some lackluster benefits. I'm searching for info to speak like the pro in the heat of the moment. I'm gonna need some smooth influence like you Black Swan. Thanks
"No" orientated questions GET YOUR REPS IN 1. Is now a bad time to talk? 2. Is it a ridiculous idea? 3. Are you against? 4. Have you given up on? a. (Your system is perfectly designed to give you the outcome you've obtained) b. Go after a "that's right" If not "sounds like I left something out? 5. Let out Your " No " a little at a time. a. "How am I supposed to do that" b. Look for implementation issues. c. Seek Empathy 6. Your offer is very generous I'm afraid it just doesn't work for me a. You're Generous b. removes external criteria c. Don't back them into a corner 7. It sounds like you have a place you want to start 8. What makes you ask? I want to make sure I'm answering what you are really asking me. 9. It seems like you have a good reason for asking that. Be prepared to count to ten be respectful 10. It seems like you have a reason for not doing.... Make sure they feel safe and respected. 7.
1- Is now a bad time to talk? 2- Is this a ridiculous idea? 3- Are you against...? 4- Have you given up on...? 5- How am I supposed to do that? Let out "NO" a little at a time. 6- Your offer is very generous I am afraid it just doesn't work for me. 7- It sounds like you have place you'd like to start 8- What makes you ask? 9- It seems like you have a good reason for asking that? 10- It seems like you have a reason for not doing...
I just used the technique of "are you against..." with a person that had not responded for a month to a request to buy a product from him. Less than half an hour after I sent the email saying are you against selling your product ..., I got a response and things are moving forward now. Thanks for the advice Chris
I’ve put all of the Black Swan philosophy to use and it works. I had to trust Chris and trust myself. Patience is the critical skill. Empathy rules! Thank you Chris!
I love the description of decision fatigue. Most people, unless they are committed to not being participants of decision fatigue, make decisions where they get tired of thinking. I do love that the Black Swan methods and tools are grounded in respect.
The 3pm low in energy is often times due to adenosine. People who drink coffee right after waking up are going to have a crash around that time when the caffeine wears off and the adenosine is allowed to bind to its given receptor again. This crash doesn’t occur if the coffee user waits 90 to 120 minutes after waking to have their 1st cup.
The timeline break down of the video is extremely helpful - whoever did that is a genius...........i would say that this video is even more helpful that the book.
I just imagined a conversation between 2 people using this technique: - How are you? - Sounds like you got a place you want to start - What makes you say that? - Looks like you have a good reason to avoid my question? - You are very generous but it doesnt work for me - Sounds like you’ve given up on this conversation? - How am I supposed to do that? - Hold on… what the hell are we talking about?
13:18 Yeah, it can backfire SO tremendously (speaking from deep, painful, personal experience here) that even if you're "dominant" in the situation you feel completely powerless when you can't bully someone into agreement by pressuring them to give a response. They will get super defensive with a "do or die, you're my enemy" mentality, even if it's subtle. More often than not you want to keep people feeling in control. This shows the flip side of appearing weak but in actuality being the most powerful person in the room, cause without your consent they can't do nothing, they can only threat in hope you don't realize the truth. I think the Black swan method realized and captured the essence and genius of this dynamic.
@@mikecoronado138 #6, but it's more broader than saying no yourself, it's for any time you want to force someone to do something, even if it's simply telling you how they feel (turn out people don't go revealing their deepest emotions like an open book. This also relates to the Unknows Unkowns concept - the things that are pulling their strings and the situation, that they don't want to share or may not even know too. That was a huge part of what caused my failure by the way). That doesn't mean you can't be assertive or aggressive but calculate their response.
Just finished your book yesterday. Excellent stuff! The thing that separates this from the other negotiation books is that it combines tactics and strategy in an easy to use way that anyone can do. Granted, the more one applies these, the better one will get at using them, but even a stumbling neophyte can get some good results from them. Just what I was looking for!
Chris hi, Tess here. Use of power & trust based influence achieved through mirrors & labels, as well as emotional intelligence & tactical empathy seek to understand the collaborating counterpart before being understood (It's not about you) for greatest chance of success in the resolution of a situation . A most respectful consideration in both context and process.
Read your book years ago. It's the only book I've ever made notes about. I lent it to someone and never got it back, but need to buy another copy. Great book.
1. Is now a bad time to talk? 2. Is it a ridiculous idea? 3. Are you against......? 4. Have you given up on......? Letting out a "No" a little at a time 5. How am I supposed to do that? 6. Your offer is very generous. I'm afraid it just doesn't work for me. 7. Sounds like you got a place to start. 8. What makes you ask? 9. Seems like your have a good reason for asking. 10. It seems like you have a reason for not doing......
Hi Chris, I wanted to comment on one of your statements. You mentioned that if you have to go before the parole board, or judge, that you shouldn't do it in the afternoon because of decision fatigue. Several studies have shown that the one factor that is correlated more than any other to getting parole is the glycemic level of the judge. In other words, have they had lunch.
@@jasonmiller9497Thanks for the response. That could be true. However, I would lean towards an explanation that suggests that if I am able to over-satiate someone with whom I am negotiating, not only have I shown that I am generous, and reasonable, but I might have also dulled their senses by forcing their body to focus blood, and resources on digestion, and \away from cognition.
Master, I've graduated. I'm now on to people like Kahaneman-Tverski and Slovic. I've found your masters. Y'all should give your sources more credit; you say research has been done, well, name sources. It's merely right, and some of us would love to go deeper. But you still the man, I still listen as you translate your sources' theories into action.
@@guybarley you didn't even bother looking further? you found one to start on and there's your night, $#!+hedd? It was a year ago Mr.Jaygoff. You knoe Bill Shatner in that SNL sketch? Search for it, you"re welcome.
LOVE LOVE LOVE THE BLACK SWAN GROUP:))have changed my life in the most beautiful way, I feel confident to speak and the art of negotiation is so fun now! infinite blessings to you all 🙏 happy new 2022
I loved your video and I have one question. Is there any way to negotiate with a Sociopath, who has managed to exploit me using humongous lies? What can I offer them to engage in a reasonable dialogue? Would you be willing to do a video on this topic? Thank you
No is an easy answer to give, and people have caught on to the fact that sales people BELIEVE that three yes responses means a sale. I love your advice, because it made sense, and I put it to the test. I never ask if someone can talk. Is there any significant difference between these two versions of the question: Is now a bad time to talk? Is this a bad time to talk?
I'm really getting a lot of great info from these videos. I'm using quite a bit of it in my day to day business. Thanks for sharing your wealth of knowledge and experience in the most stressful situations Chris.
I read Never Split the Difference and highlighted what would be 11 pages worth of key critical material. With videos like this, I add to those notes. The only problem I have run into is that I take on Chris's affect, down to his accent, when I speak with people using his techniques; so basically, I sound like a New Yorker from Iowa.
Wish I knew this years ago. I wasted so many years on yes tiedowns. This stuff is magic. Are you against... This may sound ridiculous... It seems like... How am I supposed to do that? Oh this is great 👍
Great video Chris! Amazing delivery from a top-notch negotiatior! I just finished your book and now I am revisioning my notes and watching your videos & talks.
Criss Voss sounds exactly like Mike on Breaking Bad. I listened to an interview with him on Joco Wilinks podcast and was picturing Mike the whole time lol
Extremely respectful mental synapses. Against or in favor of xyz is a no oriented questions is a difference in hypothesis. Yes or no to get reps in? It's an advisory way to make it work more than anything else. Contribution to silence is just educating yourself on how this can be done. Summarizing while simultaneous using accusation audits can increase chances in getting, 'that's right'. It's only a sample size of 30, though. Forced empathy?
I've been trying for years to use black swan methods with trolls on social media. They work sometimes. It's more difficult when there's no tone to go with the words on their screen.
Hey Chis though these questions seem to work in majority of situations. What if we translate them in other language and apply then, will they have same sort of effect?
I'm not a native English speaker, the whole "how am I supposed to do that" really got lost in translation. In my language the most likely answer would be along the lines of "well, that's your job". What if I say something like "how are WE supposed to do that?" What are your thougts? Thanks for the great content.
Hi @eng_Simoes I live in a country with similar language challenges. I don’t know if this is a good answer, but what I try to use is something like “can you tell me more?” Or “can you tell me what that would look like?” or “how do you see that playing out when we’re halfway done?”. If they push back with “that’s your job” because I’m part of implementation, I respond that I want to understand their expectations as I build that implementation plan. 🤷♀️ Thoughts?
I read the book... Never split the difference by Chris Voss... If they say 'That's your job' you need to keep the continuous question by asking 'how?' How can I do that? How supposed I do that? They will break some info and that's how you use it... They will give you more and more info, now you know how the negotiations go, more info into your hands... Let them play, you just keep asking the question 'how'... They will be tired and most likely tell you the truth by themselves.
Great video and fantastic book with lots of good references. Chris, It seems like you are very well read and I noticed the book ego, authority, failure behind you. Would you be against sharing your best reads in a future video?keep up the good work!Thanks
This is why Chris Voss still continues to be my favorite negotiators. The years of experience, details, and nuance can't be read from a book. Student for life over here!
They can be read from a book. Cause he wrote one
*NEGOTIATOR's REAL WORLD HIGH STAKES CHALLENGE*
*What can be done when a hostile person is already angry & threatening bodily injury directly at you, there is no escape possible, and you have seconds to influence the outcome of the situation?*
*Or is all this only good for business negotiations and hostages?*
Chris Voss reminds me of a squared away Marine.
Its time for employment benefits to renew. Corporate greed has motioned to sunset our pension and sub in some lackluster benefits. I'm searching for info to speak like the pro in the heat of the moment. I'm gonna need some smooth influence like you Black Swan. Thanks
Oh no! I just bought his book! 😅
"No" orientated questions
GET YOUR REPS IN
1. Is now a bad time to talk?
2. Is it a ridiculous idea?
3. Are you against?
4. Have you given up on?
a. (Your system is perfectly designed to give you the outcome you've obtained)
b. Go after a "that's right"
If not "sounds like I left something out?
5. Let out Your " No " a little at a time.
a. "How am I supposed to do that"
b. Look for implementation issues.
c. Seek Empathy
6. Your offer is very generous I'm afraid it just doesn't work for me
a. You're Generous
b. removes external criteria
c. Don't back them into a corner
7. It sounds like you have a place you want to start
8. What makes you ask?
I want to make sure I'm answering what you are really asking me.
9. It seems like you have a good reason for asking that.
Be prepared to count to ten be respectful
10. It seems like you have a reason for not doing....
Make sure they feel safe and respected.
7.
Thanks for taking and sharing notes! ❤️👍🏼
❤️
Thank you so much!! Would you be against accepting our love?
Excellent thanks ❤️
Thank you for this!!!
1- Is now a bad time to talk?
2- Is this a ridiculous idea?
3- Are you against...?
4- Have you given up on...?
5- How am I supposed to do that? Let out "NO" a little at a time.
6- Your offer is very generous I am afraid it just doesn't work for me.
7- It sounds like you have place you'd like to start
8- What makes you ask?
9- It seems like you have a good reason for asking that?
10- It seems like you have a reason for not doing...
I just used the technique of "are you against..." with a person that had not responded for a month to a request to buy a product from him. Less than half an hour after I sent the email saying are you against selling your product ..., I got a response and things are moving forward now.
Thanks for the advice Chris
"If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go as a team."
That in itself is such a great line!
I’ve put all of the Black Swan philosophy to use and it works. I had to trust Chris and trust myself. Patience is the critical skill. Empathy rules! Thank you Chris!
Got a 3k euro discount when I was buying my car and at the time I was reading this guy's book! Thank man!
I love the description of decision fatigue. Most people, unless they are committed to not being participants of decision fatigue, make decisions where they get tired of thinking. I do love that the Black Swan methods and tools are grounded in respect.
id thought this chap was just some internet celeb - glad i gave him the benefit of the doubt. real, valuable and actionable insight. Thanks
Really nice Chris, can apply these all right away. No gimmicks, no tricks, just sound principles that work.
That's Right!!
Wow! If it's free, I will take three. What a phenomenal phrase......
The 3pm low in energy is often times due to adenosine. People who drink coffee right after waking up are going to have a crash around that time when the caffeine wears off and the adenosine is allowed to bind to its given receptor again.
This crash doesn’t occur if the coffee user waits 90 to 120 minutes after waking to have their 1st cup.
The timeline break down of the video is extremely helpful - whoever did that is a genius...........i would say that this video is even more helpful that the book.
I just imagined a conversation between 2 people using this technique:
- How are you?
- Sounds like you got a place you want to start
- What makes you say that?
- Looks like you have a good reason to avoid my question?
- You are very generous but it doesnt work for me
- Sounds like you’ve given up on this conversation?
- How am I supposed to do that?
- Hold on… what the hell are we talking about?
13:18 Yeah, it can backfire SO tremendously (speaking from deep, painful, personal experience here) that even if you're "dominant" in the situation you feel completely powerless when you can't bully someone into agreement by pressuring them to give a response. They will get super defensive with a "do or die, you're my enemy" mentality, even if it's subtle. More often than not you want to keep people feeling in control.
This shows the flip side of appearing weak but in actuality being the most powerful person in the room, cause without your consent they can't do nothing, they can only threat in hope you don't realize the truth. I think the Black swan method realized and captured the essence and genius of this dynamic.
Are you referring to his #6 or #7 question?
@@mikecoronado138 #6, but it's more broader than saying no yourself, it's for any time you want to force someone to do something, even if it's simply telling you how they feel (turn out people don't go revealing their deepest emotions like an open book. This also relates to the Unknows Unkowns concept - the things that are pulling their strings and the situation, that they don't want to share or may not even know too. That was a huge part of what caused my failure by the way). That doesn't mean you can't be assertive or aggressive but calculate their response.
I don’t recall what i said but it was a ‘how’ question and it shut down a hostile person superior to me at work. Thank you.
Just finished your book yesterday. Excellent stuff! The thing that separates this from the other negotiation books is that it combines tactics and strategy in an easy to use way that anyone can do. Granted, the more one applies these, the better one will get at using them, but even a stumbling neophyte can get some good results from them. Just what I was looking for!
Chris hi, Tess here. Use of power & trust based influence achieved through mirrors & labels, as well as emotional intelligence & tactical empathy seek to understand the collaborating counterpart before being understood (It's not about you) for greatest chance of success in the resolution of a situation . A most respectful consideration in both context and process.
This is why I'll read your book for the second time. Golden material. Specific suggestions have worked for me. I wish you continued success!
This guy is brilliant. Thanks for explaining why I get to a point where I just can't deal with crap any more.
I hv read his books, and he is using two of the his fav voices in this video. How owsome
Read your book years ago. It's the only book I've ever made notes about. I lent it to someone and never got it back, but need to buy another copy. Great book.
1. Is now a bad time to talk?
2. Is it a ridiculous idea?
3. Are you against......?
4. Have you given up on......?
Letting out a "No" a little at a time
5. How am I supposed to do that?
6. Your offer is very generous. I'm afraid it just doesn't work for me.
7. Sounds like you got a place to start.
8. What makes you ask?
9. Seems like your have a good reason for asking.
10. It seems like you have a reason for not doing......
This person is 80 year old, he has seen so many things, I am hooked by his book.. Looking forward to learn a lot from him..
Actually I think he might be 90
He's 65
WTH
Is it ridiculous that I greatly appreciate this unique content AND the Chapter Outline!
I love the stories or should I say your examples. This guy is smart. I am going to have to watch it a couple of times.
Thank you for these videos and advice
I shut my eyes while listening and you turned into the CALMEST George Carlin. :)
Seriously, though , super information! Thank you for sharing it!
Your book is life changing. You’re a very interesting man! Thanks for all you share !
Thank you for those kind words!
Chris , you are wealth of information. Thank you for this video , much appreciated.
Hi Chris, I wanted to comment on one of your statements.
You mentioned that if you have to go before the parole board, or judge, that you shouldn't do it in the afternoon because of decision fatigue. Several studies have shown that the one factor that is correlated more than any other to getting parole is the glycemic level of the judge. In other words, have they had lunch.
That's really interesting!
I wonder if that is why traditionally negotiations were conducted over meals?
@@jasonmiller9497Thanks for the response.
That could be true. However, I would lean towards an explanation that suggests that if I am able to over-satiate someone with whom I am negotiating, not only have I shown that I am generous, and reasonable, but I might have also dulled their senses by forcing their body to focus blood, and resources on digestion, and \away from cognition.
Every single word. GOLD.
You really resonate with me. I am extremely impressed with your clarity and radical ideas
Chris ... we should rename you as the “ HUMAN WHISPER “. Your awesome bratha.
Chris Voss is amazing! Thanks for your generosity in sharing your valuable 🙏masterpiece creations.
Blue Ocean 🌊 I remember reading that before starting my business. Stuff works
thank you for your advice. I appreciate the knowledge you and your team share.
Master, I've graduated. I'm now on to people like Kahaneman-Tverski and Slovic. I've found your masters. Y'all should give your sources more credit; you say research has been done, well, name sources. It's merely right, and some of us would love to go deeper. But you still the man, I still listen as you translate your sources' theories into action.
Seems like you have not listened to him giving credit to Kahneman on countless interviews he has done.
@@guybarley you didn't even bother looking further? you found one to start on and there's your night, $#!+hedd? It was a year ago Mr.Jaygoff. You knoe Bill Shatner in that SNL sketch? Search for it, you"re welcome.
Appreciate you and all the knowledge & wisdom you’ve shared blessings
Flipping amazing! Only words I have!
“A giraffe is a horse designed by a committee”, what a hilarious take!
Outstanding tips. Mahalo for sharing. God bless you and your ohana always.
The best book on negotiation I have ever know ❤
Thank you Chris and team!
Thanks sir, my perception of your lesson, give me peace.
that's right, so powerful
Thanks for sharing this!
Great stuff. Thank you Chris
Made my day! Mr Voss you know how to get your message across 👑
Tactical empathy
Got two words for you Chris -Luv You.............hugs
You are a Good Man Sir
Chris Voss is a god
So, so good. Bought the book, watched the Masterclass, and always more to learn. Thank you
I did the same! 😄🙌
LOVE LOVE LOVE THE BLACK SWAN GROUP:))have changed my life in the most beautiful way, I feel confident to speak and the art of negotiation is so fun now! infinite blessings to you all 🙏 happy new 2022
This is bad ass. Big Pass A Put in your mind when at the tray. Stay focused on negotiating- not delibratong😢
This is incredible
Thanks Chris!
tactical empathy awesome.......
Great negotiation bullets and fantastic book. Thank you for sharing your knowledge.
I loved your video and I have one question. Is there any way to negotiate with a Sociopath, who has managed to exploit me using humongous lies? What can I offer them to engage in a reasonable dialogue? Would you be willing to do a video on this topic?
Thank you
that is worth so many millions
I have your book also but seeing how you do this in these Videos is very helpful
GREAT REAL WORLD STUFF!
excellent!
Glad you think so!
This is GOLD
It can be very good parenting guide too,
Just please don’t tell our children, they could use on us too 😀👌
Thank you loved the video 💜❤️💚💙⭐️🙏
No is an easy answer to give, and people have caught on to the fact that sales people BELIEVE that three yes responses means a sale. I love your advice, because it made sense, and I put it to the test. I never ask if someone can talk.
Is there any significant difference between these two versions of the question:
Is now a bad time to talk?
Is this a bad time to talk?
Great content thank you for sharing!
I'm really getting a lot of great info from these videos. I'm using quite a bit of it in my day to day business. Thanks for sharing your wealth of knowledge and experience in the most stressful situations Chris.
That's amazing! We love to hear about your success using the techniques! Keep up the good work!
This is powerful stuff! Thank you!!
Impressive. Greetings from Indonesia
It’s important to respond “What MAKES you ask” or, “What CAUSES you to ask and NOT “Why do you ask”.
I read Never Split the Difference and highlighted what would be 11 pages worth of key critical material. With videos like this, I add to those notes. The only problem I have run into is that I take on Chris's affect, down to his accent, when I speak with people using his techniques; so basically, I sound like a New Yorker from Iowa.
Stay curious, be likable and use your accommodating/ friendly tone
I just busted out laughing at this comment. 😂
Wish I knew this years ago. I wasted so many years on yes tiedowns. This stuff is magic. Are you against... This may sound ridiculous... It seems like... How am I supposed to do that? Oh this is great 👍
Your voice sounds like Al Pacino
Great video!
You think so?
Great! Such a great info ! Some much to learn!
Great video Chris! Amazing delivery from a top-notch negotiatior! I just finished your book and now I am revisioning my notes and watching your videos & talks.
Hey! Keep up the good work!
Excellent content! 🎉
Criss Voss sounds exactly like Mike on Breaking Bad. I listened to an interview with him on Joco Wilinks podcast and was picturing Mike the whole time lol
Excellent !
Extremely respectful mental synapses. Against or in favor of xyz is a no oriented questions is a difference in hypothesis. Yes or no to get reps in? It's an advisory way to make it work more than anything else. Contribution to silence is just educating yourself on how this can be done. Summarizing while simultaneous using accusation audits can increase chances in getting, 'that's right'. It's only a sample size of 30, though. Forced empathy?
Right on Boss!
My understanding it has been shown that is better to ask after lunch when people are fed and rested.
I've been trying for years to use black swan methods with trolls on social media. They work sometimes. It's more difficult when there's no tone to go with the words on their screen.
Fantastic tips
Worked for me
Hey Chis though these questions seem to work in majority of situations. What if we translate them in other language and apply then, will they have same sort of effect?
Thx., once again.
Back again, using these techniques with very capricious people. Cheers.
I'm not a native English speaker, the whole "how am I supposed to do that" really got lost in translation. In my language the most likely answer would be along the lines of "well, that's your job". What if I say something like "how are WE supposed to do that?" What are your thougts? Thanks for the great content.
Good question
I don't think "We" is the best option Vinde. I'd suggest something more like, "How so?"
Hi @eng_Simoes I live in a country with similar language challenges. I don’t know if this is a good answer, but what I try to use is something like “can you tell me more?” Or “can you tell me what that would look like?” or “how do you see that playing out when we’re halfway done?”.
If they push back with “that’s your job” because I’m part of implementation, I respond that I want to understand their expectations as I build that implementation plan. 🤷♀️
Thoughts?
I read the book... Never split the difference by Chris Voss... If they say 'That's your job' you need to keep the continuous question by asking 'how?'
How can I do that?
How supposed I do that?
They will break some info and that's how you use it... They will give you more and more info, now you know how the negotiations go, more info into your hands... Let them play, you just keep asking the question 'how'... They will be tired and most likely tell you the truth by themselves.
great info
Is there anyone in the world who doesn't love this man... 🚀✨ Thank you for writing one of my favourite books and doing all these amazing things 🙂
Great video and fantastic book with lots of good references. Chris, It seems like you are very well read and I noticed the book ego, authority, failure behind you. Would you be against sharing your best reads in a future video?keep up the good work!Thanks
That's a great idea!! We'll definitely brainstorm doing that. :)
Golden
Power
You need to be a guest on Scott Adam’s Periscopes
decision fatigue - i got that once at subway... lettuce? onions? tomatoes? on and on - never went back
Love how he is using latenight fm dj voice throughout
I'm curious how these transfer over to remote work using text messages and emails.
Incredible