Why Does He Flirt And Show Interest And Get Close, And When You Reciprocate, He Pulls Away?
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- Опубликовано: 10 май 2014
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thank you, youtube uncle
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RUclips uncle 🤣😜
I mean your techincally correct😂😂
Either he's married or has a girlfriend. He is a jerk who just likes to flirt for ego purposes! #Truth
This happened to me recently, what angers me is he is the one who initiated everything, we talked forever, on a regular basis, asked me to hang out, made plans to then ghosts me out of nowhere. I will never chase an Insecure ass game player.
lol i bet u will
Forreal like YOU came to ME!!!!!
EXACTLY!!! I boggles my mind. He put those fillers out there and all Im doing is responding in kind. This type of behavior is so selfish and inconsiderate.
I just experienced this and now he says you can walk out and it's getting difficult to move on
".. He initiated everything.. " "... I will never CHASE an insecure player"
How you were the one to chase when he initiated everything? Make it make sense.
Bitch, you didn't reciprocate, that's why he left your ass.
There is literally no other excuse for this behavior, you completely nailed it on the head. It is all about manipulating a person. I tried to believe it was more innocent than that, it wasn't. The person is insecure and wants control again.
Exactly there's no excuse for this behavior its manipulative and inconsiderate.
@@cleanchannel3029 I dumped his ass! He hates me ever since. But I am proud! I have taught him a lesson!
I have found this with men. They don't like it when I make the first moves because it's like I'm emasculated them. I never realized that's how my moves or desire was getting interpreted in that way.
Happened to me so many times with various men, I have lost count. Every time I would blame myself that I scared them away or that I looked too desperate or that I am not attractive enough for them to actually date me or that I am an idiot who misread friendly gestures or whatever. And every time it was revealed later on they had a girlfriend all along. I'm just glad I'm not the one to blame. It is too harsh when the only way you know how to deal with rejection is blame yourself.
It must have been very tough to deal as I do face the same issues.. I don't know how to even cut him off I try ignoring him but I do fail.. I end up making fool of myself and blaming myself.. Puff
I feel better I’m not alone in how I feel
My current situation..he has pulled back so I decided to fall back too. Now there's no communication between us
Jarhonda Gamble me too! Well, I've decided that I was going to ignore him the next time he messages me. One day he'll send me ultra sweet and flirty messages. Then, when i reciprocated a couple days later, he didn't respond. I don't want to get caught up in his game and give him all the power. I think I'll try giving him a dose of his own medicine. I was afraid that if I did that, we would lose contact altogether. Like, what if he could care less and I was just a pass time, and he doesn't care if I don't respond to him. But, that just has to be a chance I'm willing to take. If he's. or the one, he's not the one. And if I don't hear from him after that, I'll get over it and meet someone else.
Right,me too! Too old for fames!
@@ladydignity Never too old. I'm 52 and I get young men in their 20's. I played their games and now they are hooked. I just walk away Everytime. Young boys don't do anything for me. Just an ego boost
Jarhonda Gamble same do you think I should just move on
A lot of men that do this are emotionally unavailable men
Ugh. I hate when guys do this and they shouldn't. To them yes, flirting with a girl is fun and makes them feel good, but to a girl it's misleading and unfair. And in my experience it's not just brief flirtation as he passes by in the hallway, it's pretty heavy come-ons. And then you find out they have a GF. Been there a million times
kristin lee now you know how is guys feel with woman who are big flirts.
Same here. Cute guy at work. Every time I pass him he gives me incredible smiles! Like obvious real big ones. Meet cute type stuff. A few weeks later I got his name and pinged him on bbg chat. He did t even know who I was until I told him. It was perfunctory at best. Just a bunch of dull questions and then he said he had a client meeting. Never heard from him again. Am I stupid? I still see him and don’t look his way and just avoid. I thought it was on me to say something. He made a joke about asking what he could do to make my day better and playfully responded “how about a coffee or cocktail” bc we first saw each other at the Starbucks. I don’t get it? What’s the point if you have no desire to even speak to me. God I feel like a stalker or something!
This is what I am currently dealing with, and it's hard. I like him but the withdrawal is upsetting and so I am going to step back. Just the way it is and I need to protect myself. Thanks for making these videos, they are really great.
Can you tell me and you still into him or have you moved on since?
and u can open ur path to the right person to come in!
It's a dam shame
Everything you talk about is so TRUE. This guy in my class flirts with me all the time but when I flirt too he kind of backs out, and recently I discovered he's still in love with his ex girlfriend.
Good that he backs out, save u some heartache!
That is so true :P
I am dealing with this pain
Me too as a guy a girl just ghosted me.
Guys are selfish....he flirts with me but I can't flirt with him? Sorry, but that's NOT okay. It hurts, if you don't know that.
Amen. He's essentially being the male equivalent of a cocktease -- something men find appalling and aggravating...but it's OK when they do it? Double standard guys, not to mention cruel and rude.
Yes it does
I think you just decribed what happened to me. for months a guy has acted interested, flirted, showed concern, hugged me every time he saw me. Then last week announces that he has a girlfriend! He looked at me and told me a few months ago that he was single. I was trying to be patient and not pressure him.
Wow. This is the BEST explanation I have EVER heard, and I’m not even exaggerating. I’m experiencing this exact scenario.
It sucks, but damn I dodged a bullet and refuse to be manipulated again. (I have a child with a narcissistic disordered man)
I am content with being single indefinitely, or maybe become a lesbian❤️
Thank you dear!!
I know this is an old video, but thank you for making clear what I wasn't able to understand. Made no sense why a guy would bother flirting so much, only to potentially have to deal with a woman who now likes him. But the ego boost makes total sense.
Yes!! You nailed it again! I just love you!
Thank you for giving real, clear, to the point answers. You're one of the best coaches I've seen on the internet.
This is kind of how I feel with someone I'm seeing now We're getting closer but I don't think he necessarily WANTS a relationship with me. However I am ready for one and would like to keep moving forward. I think he's just in a place in his life where he doesn't want to jump into anything serious, he probably didn't expect us to hit it off so well after our first date. I also think he wants to see what else is out there..Idk if his all that attracted to me tbh : ( I'm not really his type based on looking at his exs..it sucks but what can you do. I can only move on and expand my horizons.
why ? BECAUSE YOU LET HIM DO IT
it becomes like a drug he treats you so badly then gives you little empty fake attention to keep you hanging
Same here. Cute guy at work. Every time I pass him he gives me incredible smiles! Like obvious real big ones. Meet cute type stuff. A few weeks later I got his name and pinged him on bbg chat. He did t even know who I was until I told him. It was perfunctory at best. Just a bunch of dull questions and then he said he had a client meeting. Never heard from him again. Am I stupid? I still see him and don’t look his way and just avoid. I thought it was on me to say something. He made a joke about asking what he could do to make my day better and playfully responded “how about a coffee or cocktail” bc we first saw each other at the Starbucks. I don’t get it? What’s the point if you have no desire to even speak to me. God I feel like a stalker or something!
Hat's off to your level of understanding. Thanks.
thank you so much you just answered the question that's been lingering for awhile
thank you again ! your logic is so true !
Spot on !!!! Your awesome. Such great insight and knowledge, mans perspective is a plus !! When I don't respond to his texts. He bombards me .. Now I will just block him.
Yes
My current situation. This info is so huge. I’ve watched a lot of your video and even some lives you were doing. Almost wanted to chime in, But this video specifically, is the answer I was looking for. I appreciate your work.
fantastic channel, thanks man, keep up the great work! so good to see someone talk sense, to the point and in such short videos!
I'm going through this right now. I have a crush on this guy that I work close with... and he flirts with me all the time and always tries to make me laugh. He texts me when we're at work and he comes and visits me at my job.. we talk for a little bit then he's rushed to leave... I don't know if I have too much power when I flirt with him? He just seems like he doesn't initiate anything else after the workplace flirting... it drives me insane. I guess I just have to get over him.
You're young and beautiful, he spunds like an absolute dickhead!! Definitely let him go fuck elsewhere. Eventually he'll fall on his swords.
@@carriefawcett9990 you get the gold star in understanding relationships don;t cha
Sounds like he has a gf or wife and just flirts with women at work to boost his ego
OMG! So much clarity, thanks so much🇦🇺👌🤗
THANKS the most confusing I have ever encountered
This is so true, this happened to me wow.
thank you for ur wisdom. Today as true as 8 years ago, when u released it.
I really enjoy your videos and advice you make the most sense on you tube to me and you are very down to earth I find you the most genuine you are my favourite and I had to subscribe Thank you for being you God bless
good deep stuff thanks for the wisdom cheers!
that's correct i do this . you even explain my actions without me knowing mann. lol
I think that is it...sounds right. We will be just really good friends. And that is ok.
This is so true omggggg
This is really good.
This is happening now. He always liked me and flirts with me to no end emotionally and teases the fact that I'm the "one". I was hesitant for about two months but he was persistent so I finally gave him my number...he never called. No big deal oh well his loss we still work together,one day he said didnt call cause he lost his phone. Ive Given him my number again weeks passed and still no call I asked why keep flirting with with no intentions he said in the sincerest way possible to mankind that hes so sorry he has a lot thing happening with relatives and had to pick up another job and he have no sleep anymore which gives him less ability to communicate to everyone, I felt bad and said okay and he said hes off on a Tuesday let's go out. Tuesday come and goes and here we are again. We have been good friends prior to any attentions to date,but after this it's hard for me to have any respect for him even as a friend, nevermind a significant other. I'm starting to think he had no interest at all in dating me,and from the grapevines I heard he just got into a new relationship. So I'm questioning Was him not calling was his subtle rejection. I let him pass my guarded walls for him to reject me and find someone else instead. It's just wrong to lead someone on like this and I never been rejected like this so I dont know how to act like we're still the best of friends if he couldn't be upfront and say that he was no longer interested
Don’t worry..the new girl will give him the same strife and confusion he put you through. Karma has a perfect way of balancing out wrongs done to humans. All the best on your love journey!🦋
I feel better. Thank you.
U made me understand alot, thank you!
Very true. I’m a girl, and I have done this before (I know it’s wrong)
You nailed it once again. I'm definitely getting into ALL of your insight. Wish I could talk to you personally!!! 😀
Omg so am dealing with a player!!
If a guy teases you - look at you from head to toe- call your name - and smiles at you - DO HE HAVE A CRUSH ON ME !! He haven't really said anything cause we work together. I need to know what I should do HELP PLEASE
if no further approach, he is using you and probably has a gf.
Thanks very helpful!
What are some of the signs of a guy being affraid of being in a relationship but he likes you?
Killuminatisx blupp This video is all aboht what you wanna know.
Thank you You are awesome!
im going through something identical to this. there is a guy i care for who flirts, shows interest, gets close, we have very intimate and deep conversations about our lives. we cuddle each other at nights, he treats me like someone he is romantically interested in. we share kisses, then when i let him know how i feel, he says he only wants to be my friend. i dont understand. i tried to get a consultation but the link doesnt work.
aimi anetor I had the same thing happen to me
G A Y
aimi anetor tell him friends don't cuddle.
aimi anetor I had the exact same situation. Send him to space. Its fake. Don’t settle for less. It took me 3 years to get to this point where I can pass all the hurt he caused. Its not worth it.
@@blankakasza7221 are you with someone now?
Love your videos.
and he freks out.
Or he got cool with you and realized that "oh shit, I really want her in my life.... but I already have a girl." Sadly this has happened with me many times. It's just the way men keep women as back up options, just like women keep one or two guys in reserve. But I'm at least tell them I have a girl, and leave it to them to stay or keep playing a long. Still toxic doe☹️.
I'm going through this now . This guy approached me asking why am I always running from him when he try to talk to me , I said what do you want to talk about ?? He said nothing . After he said that I started speaking to him everytimr I see him .. today he asked me when are my off days that's it . He always have small talk then dissapear like wtf is he going to ask for my number
Thank youzzzzz
Good words !
I'm with a guy I adore. He says he likes a lot of space...the lone wolf. We get close on weekends, then he is cold as ice through the week. It's been like 2 months of dating. Can a guy who enjoys control & space (from everyone) even fall in love?
He might find love but it’s gonna be difficult.
Sounds like he is hiding something
I've come to realize this is 100% me. Natural flirt with women, but when things seem real I back out. The only somewhat difference in the video would be the reason behind it. I choose to be a flirt for fun, but I refuse to get serious because all i can ever think about is the mental state of mind my ex-girl put me through for months. So many girls I've led on and backed out of for this particular reason.
Shtangarang
I got my crush's number without his permission (he put his phone number on social media for fans and sponsors to contact him since he is an actor/model). I tried to contact him by a phone call but i didn't want to seem to be eager to talk to him or a stalker, so i acted like his number was saved by someone in my phone under no name and that is why i called him to know to whom belongs the number ! He replied and denied that the phone number belongs to him ! He gave me a false name (maybe he thought it's a trap or someone is trying to troll him) but when i said my real name he acted like he doesn't know me even though i'm the sister of his brother's wife and he shared a dance with me( not even his friend who came with him) at their wedding in front of everyone ! When i was calling i heard some people (probably his friends) talking to him maybe he ignored me because he didn't want to get teased or me to heard something ? Maybe he thought that some girl is trying to talk to him using my name ?
He is a celebrity and girls are fighting over him in social media and real life.
Maybe he felt that it is going real and this is why he also pulled away ?
Karma will hit you back...you give false hopes to satisfy your ego..
That’s just cruel and selfish. Hopefully you don’t go through what you’ve put others through but maybe it’ll take it happening to you for you to learn.
This was 5 years ago, so hopefully you’ve learned and stopped doing that.
Yeah it's really irritating..i don't know what to do
it is cool couse your stuff that i listen to it works around my crush
Yes yes yes i am trying to get with a man like this right now he's a wonderful man that i would love to get to know better and marry he's a old fashion kind of Man i would love him forever
This is exactly what is happening. And I have been giving this guy time (as he has so many things on his plate with his mother (health)/career peak/immigrating to new country) and so now I have just been talking less as its been 6 months and I don't want to indulge my heart..being cautious (plus I have been busy). He does care but maybe once he settles he will know exactly what he wants. He still talks to me but I am kinda trying to make him work for me. If he really wants me, then he should reciprocate back..if not then guess time to move on.
Sun K Let go completely. It's time. Been there.
Dhumma Vati Ya I agree :(
Sun K So have you?
Yes I have recently let go of my thoughts to conquer him. His loss not mine. If he wants me he should call and make more of an effort.
Sun K That's the spirit! As Maya Angelou said: "Never make someone a priority when you are only an option to them."
I agree to this guy❤
Are there any solutions to this?
I love your example of watching a horror movie 🤣
Interesting..... this guy I’ve liked for a long time has been brushing against me, flirting w me by making eye contact and saying I had no balls to buy him a drink and then he still looks at me at the club but also pretends I don’t exist. However he talks to his friends about me but he said he wasn’t interested so I’m super confused. Please help 🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️ 😊
I really need your advice, I work with my crush and he’s the one who flirted with me first. At work he calls my name and we have a good conversation and whenever my shift is over earlier than his, he stretches his arm out so that I hug him. I text him if we could play online together and he agrees but he never played with me or messaged back. I’m confused, does anyone have tips for me?
Okay. This is happening to me. So, should I just ignore the next time he messages me? Give him a taste of his own medicine. Idk. Turn the tables a little bit?
Going thru same and wonder what should i continue to do??? Work with him and see him everyday. Ughhh
Omg! I can relate
This is literally the most horrible thing. They promise you long relationship stability trust me and all that. Finally when you open your heart , not even a message. Why the hell do they do this??? Literally every guy is like this.
I just want to talk to any nerds who will listen,, but basically I've really liked this dude but I kind of just wanted to get over it. then all of a sudden he is flirting being super kind and making me go mad over him. but then... he kind of just stops... and ignores my texts tries to make me jealous and all sorts of things like that so its nice to know my youtube uncle has my back and this boy is just being egotistical and controlling and I can try my best to get out of my situation
My ex does this. He flirts with me, is attracted to me, but he doesn t want a relationship with me again yet..
I wonder if the guy I talk to is the same as you described cause he flirts with me a lot when I start to flirt he enjoys it and even he said I push him away and if I was at his place he would approach me but in reality he is the one who push me away cause I know he suddenly will start to talk about his ex and how he is not over her all the time..
so that means he don't want a relationship but why is he acting like
that ?
I feel like being played...
He might not be sure about his sexuality. That just happened to me with my straight friend.
I'm experiencing this right now he me feel like me sweet an dconcern over text and suddenly pull away
That's true because I met him five years ago though I call him from time to time since there were no balance though I went on with my life thought I'll check it though he had conversation however we've seen one another the day we met though he seem to be a gentleman at the same time comments on how I should take his number because he this or that though he like the way I'm fitting them jeans though I should get involved into something he's interest go on about how I can do that..woo
I'm really confused. Sometimes I hear my crush talk about me with his friends, but then he's too scared to talk to me for some reason, but he isn't afraid to say ”hey beautiful” to me but I'm not sure if he meant me maybe maybe not and then I just get confused. And I heard he has a sister. Well I assume that they are related because they look a bit similar. His sister is in my history and his sister gives me this look like she knows something which is strange... I don't know what this means at all... He tries to say hi to me sometimes but I'm kind of scared to say hi back to him. Before the bell in school, I would start leaving early, and then a few days later he does the same too what does it all mean?
So how can we react to cause a shift, help him be at peace, & fall in love.
Madam Blue wondering the same .
You can't change a man so don't even try
So basically these are the immature ones addicted the chase, the rush they get from it. I flirt back and forth with a guy but im not sure he wants anything serious. He lives far but he's is travelling to see me this year
After 12 months of flirting I doubt it he is dealing with something or someone in his life.
Please help.is my case, I asked him, and was his answer, kind of.lol.what to do in this situation, I am in love now, we have been with this for almost a year now.😒
what can i do about it??? is there anyway so he won't freak out?
Try to get him to hang out with you doing something you know he loves.
I like you the way you come across
An guy did that to me
YUP! This is him. Amazing how most of your videos is describing my guy. How frustrating!
I'm dealing this kind of situation right now.he flirt with me before.I've met him last Dec.and until now we are dealing this kind of stuffs we had sex already.but we don't have any relationship because he's married but he told me I'm special to him.we are not dating only the two of us..should be with my friends..but I really love this guy.what should I do I need him to miss me..I'm just the one initiating contacts
He's using you
Regular human being :)
is this the same reason for women who do this?
yup, especially stay away from those women; they're CONTROL FREAKS.
how to react to this sort of a person, this horror movie stuff is going on in my life at work..
Same here! WhAt to do????
❤❤
🤦🏾♀️
Yea but why would he do it for 5 years ?
It's like, if the girl is acting arrogant and bitchy along with showing real signs of interest after an interaction, then I have to be cautious and take control of the situation for survival purposes.
this is what my 'he' is doing these days.
please tell how to react! your vids have helped me a lot dealing with my crush lately! per your vids he seems to be a player!
😂 dump him big deal u need to cry alone vibe on a sad song but just ghost him that’s what they deserve
So that means he likes me
Does that mean I have a chance with him
Well he flirts back
I feel like he has a girlfriend and why he couldn't just be honest. The way he went cold turkey on me after questioning him smh
Omg very irritating 😠
Why not do a unisex video on this? Girls do this shit too.
in other words he's just a jerk whoever he is hahaha