An Honest Conversation about Psychosis | My Life with Schizoaffective Disorder Bipolar Type

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  • Опубликовано: 4 дек 2024

Комментарии • 157

  • @timothywilliams2887
    @timothywilliams2887 6 месяцев назад +40

    When I was young, far away from being diagnosed. I felt people watching me and I couldn't shake it. Now I am very grateful for modern medicine because I don't have to be homeless. It's a real blessing.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +5

      It so is, glad you got help too!

    • @natas12rm
      @natas12rm 5 месяцев назад +1

      How does the medicine prevent you from being homeless? I just saw a study that 85% of people taking antidepressants couldn’t tell the difference between an ssri and a placebo. 85%!! I’m sure numbers could be similar with schizophrenia. Idk I don’t take meds and haven’t for the most part all my life. What helps me is the experience of going through psychosis so I can maintain when it happens and people around me wouldn’t even know because I’m holding it together. Honestly, the last time I was at the hospital and got harassed by the dr who was trying to break his patients, I got a $3k bill. Now I just push through the psychosis and I get it almost everyday for the last 2 years. It pushes me to the limits to hear a hundred voices say kill yourself a thousand times an hour while you have to work in a fast paced environment but I did it. I wish I could tell what my psychosis is like. I could make a movie scarier than insidious. Anyway the point is it’s you keeping yourself from homelessness. The doctors would tell me to get ssi and just be a vegetable for the rest of my life putting chemically lobotomizing pills down my throat. THEY defeat you, not the illness. It ain’t easy but I can’t just look at a comment like this and be like sounds right after all the fascists I’ve seen working in the hospitals and the doctors who would intentionally try to make their patients have a breakdown.

    • @extrememiami
      @extrememiami 3 месяца назад +2

      ​@natas12rm every person is didn't and ypu shouldn't equate ypur situation with that of others. SSRIs are prescribed as a treatment of depression and don't work on a large percentage of people because only some forms of depression are from serotonin. Antiphyscotics work to a higher degree because most physcotic disorders are dopamine related. Also it sounds like you are a high functioning skitsoaffective, where you can have audible hallucinations but maybe have lighter or even no episodes of physcosis, others do though and medicine can be a huge help to those. Just saying don't advocate against something that has been proven to help others, state that in your case it didn't help. Antiphyscotics are not at all similar to SSRI's.

    • @natas12rm
      @natas12rm 3 месяца назад

      @@extrememiami you just parrot what ever they tell you. Also, serotonin has no relation to depression ie the 2022 study published in molecular psychiatry. Chemical imbalances play no part in depression. But you were saying it was before science not for profit of pharma did a study. It’s a racket, a racket ran by eugenicist profiteers.

  • @WWS322
    @WWS322 6 месяцев назад +19

    I live on disability and I have affordable housing. I am disabled, even handicapped. I played guitar today and had to stop after 20 minutes because I was burned out. I was disappointed. If I had a job and provided for myself I'd be proud.

  • @dannyllerenatv8635
    @dannyllerenatv8635 6 месяцев назад +29

    Dude, I would hug you if I could. This is so relatable, especially the part where you are stable yet the second significant amount of stress hits you, things go haywire. Thank you for being so candid with us and I am hoping you feel better!

  • @Gothy_Guru
    @Gothy_Guru 6 месяцев назад +4

    I wanted to cry watching this. It’s hard to describe this feeling and the struggle to know what isn't real. It feels so isolating, and I feel like I have no one to talk to who can relate to or understand. I just want everything to stop.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад

      It might not feel like it, but none of us are alone. I hang onto that as much as I can. And it helps

  • @rainygreene9161
    @rainygreene9161 6 месяцев назад +10

    The someone in the room watching you thing. Can you talk more about that and what it is. I experience that sooo much.
    I hate how terribly this hurts you inside!

    • @spxrtzn-vc5oq
      @spxrtzn-vc5oq 6 месяцев назад +1

      dude i hade this last night soo bad it kept me up for 2 hours and i was hearing a youngf female voice. being schizo is cool sometimes but hell others

    • @spxrtzn-vc5oq
      @spxrtzn-vc5oq 6 месяцев назад +1

      external voices too.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +1

      I definitely will, I’ll add that kind of hallucination to the list!

  • @benstramel2355
    @benstramel2355 6 месяцев назад +5

    For something that is bee🐝 related giving you good vibes and a hug 🥰 from Florida

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +2

      Thank you so so much!

  • @HeWhoWearzHatz
    @HeWhoWearzHatz 6 месяцев назад +5

    I don't question or define what is "real" anymore. Everything cycles. I sit in the current perception of reality and acknowledge it as canon, and then I let it pass. I compartmentalize it while also acknowledging that everything is connected. Contradicting layers upon layers. I set boundaries and rules of love and compassion for all entities. These rules and boundaries follow me in every perceived reality. My goal is to plant both feet in consensus reality while letting my heart fly and meet the voices/hallucinations where they are. The dark and the light. "My heart is my compass, the stars are my home. In the light, in the dark, I am never alone." All our experiences are different and traumatic and ineffable, but they rhyme. I lean on hope. -with unconditional love and understanding, I see you ❤️

  • @annasfakianaki7979
    @annasfakianaki7979 6 месяцев назад +10

    Hey Kit! I totally understand your desperation about this condition and it is totally valid and hard. But remember. You are not alone. There are tons of us who relate to you on this level and feel the same sometimes. I fully understand what you say. And the funny thing is that this video finds me in a mood where I feel desperate as well but for other symptoms of psychosis. For me it is the social withdrawal and social awkwardness that ruins my life. I just returned home totally tired of social interactions and I watched your video which put in words all my thoughts and feelings of today. And I feel so much relieved. We are together in this. I know life is harder for some people and we are these "some people" but I hope none of us is alone. And you are a reason for this. Much love from me

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +3

      We are never alone, so true! And its so easy to feel alone but I know deep down I’m not and that gives me some level of peace in this h*llscape

  • @mr.beaver2822
    @mr.beaver2822 6 месяцев назад +6

    Given to my language barrier I can't both comment and or descrive what hell of a life is been and still is nobody said until I was 53 that I was a Bipolar!! I have been screwing and messing everything up since I was a kid... I am still watching this video and couldn't stop writing something to share know that only we 'ill' community can understand you... thanks for what you do on here and the energy you need to be talking about yourself Hugs from Italy

  • @lindotimo
    @lindotimo 6 месяцев назад +5

    You have to cope with your illness unavoidably. There are no other choices. I can only show my empathy to you. As a child of a schizophrenic mother, I remember my mother as a good mother.

  • @DavidGalich77
    @DavidGalich77 5 месяцев назад +2

    It sounds very bad and I know the feeling of "why me?" Just keep on keeping on and do not forget to breathe.

  • @ourbipolar
    @ourbipolar 6 месяцев назад +5

    Friend! I’m so glad you were vulnerable and made this video.
    The crack in the universe type of psychosis with everything feeling off sounds so disconcerting. I haven’t experienced that.
    You didn’t ask for any of this. I didn’t ask for bipolar 1.
    I relate to your fear of wondering when symptoms will appear. Especially since the meds don’t get rid of symptoms entirely, like you said.
    This video will help so many feel seen and less isolated and will help so many others understand psychosis better. ❤ -Jess

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +2

      This is so sweet Jess thanks for the comment! And I hate that you relate in terms of that fear of symptoms. It’s such a scary lace to be and I try not to think about it too hard. Thanks for this!

  • @Transwithhands
    @Transwithhands 6 месяцев назад +2

    That feeling makes sense. From what i know, it's a matrixing disorder, so how your brain processes things differently. Giving you the fun house effects.

  • @RickardSvensson-t1u
    @RickardSvensson-t1u 6 месяцев назад +4

    I'm kinda like you, i've got schizophrenia according to my doctors but i go across the world on music festivals to see my favourite punkbands. 2019 i went alone to Slovenia from Sweden to camp in the fucking mountains for 5 days, i always go psychotic during these trips and i know i will before going, i worry 6 months ahead of everything that could possibly go wrong, but i'm alive and i'd say it keeps me growing and going forward, can't let your fears control you totally or what other people say, i had psychologists tell me not to go, but i went, had the best time of my life, made tons of new friends and saw my favourite bands.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +2

      I will never stop traveling, I’ll just get better at coping. I want to see the world more than most things in life and my illness is well, also a part of my life. But I refuse to hide in my room and never go anywhere.

    • @RickardSvensson-t1u
      @RickardSvensson-t1u 6 месяцев назад

      @@SchizoKitzo Well apparently i like to quote dillinger four but they have a lyric that goes "when thinking of the size, of this world right outside, please don't waste it trying to hide"

  • @andreimarinescu4259
    @andreimarinescu4259 6 месяцев назад +3

    Keep strong, Kit! You here, making the uncomfortable just a bit more comfortable has helped immensely. You're literally a ray of sunshine in a lot of people's lives and I really hope you'll feel better soon! Big hugs!

  • @MichelleAmor-ip3nd
    @MichelleAmor-ip3nd 6 месяцев назад +5

    Hi! I'm so sorry you are going through this. My heart goes out to you. Last year I was diagnosed with bipolar and was having psychosis too. It is really something else. You hang in there. You're such a beautiful person and I have been so blessed watching these videos. You have inspired me and so many others. I do wish that you didn't have to suffer like this. I will be praying for You. Keep on keeping on. Peace and love.

  • @johniannuzzi9635
    @johniannuzzi9635 6 месяцев назад +1

    I like to watch her videos because it makes me feel like I’m not alone in this. Even this very moment I find my self in pain.

  • @LoveWarDeath
    @LoveWarDeath 2 месяца назад

    I cried during this. I don't have a psychotic disorder, but my psychiatrist thinks I have Schizoaffective. I truly believe that I was misdiagnosed with an Anxiety disorder since I was thirteen. But I utterly understand the crack in the universe break experience. I feel for you so much! its so terrifying and isolating. But I support you!
    TW: Unreality
    I have ones where I feel I'm slipping between dimensions and that I'm dreaming, or dead, or in a coma. Sometimes that I'm being pulled from both sides into a different realm of reality. truly terrifying.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  2 месяца назад

      You’re heard. And best of luck on you diagnosis journey, and know a diagnosis is not the end!

  • @Fisherman_1992
    @Fisherman_1992 6 месяцев назад +4

    I hope you’re feeling better ❤❤❤ I know it’s hard but you can get through this ❤❤❤

  • @anitazhinzhikova5827
    @anitazhinzhikova5827 3 месяца назад

    Thank you so much for sharing your experience. Knowing that you're not alone struggling with mental issues is a blessing. I hope you'll be better.❤

  • @MrSamdam66
    @MrSamdam66 6 месяцев назад +1

    Incredibly relatable, the whole crack in the universe, for me it feels like theres actually a crack across the sky that only I seem to be able to experience and everyone around me is oblivious to the pending dread that I know is there. Carrying on without a care while I feel the my world die

  • @alsbigsmoke
    @alsbigsmoke Месяц назад

    I hope you're doing good kit, I'm schizophrenic and i know how you feel it's got to the point where i hate this life as it's ruined my hopes and dreams and robbed me of opportunities I'll never get back and decades I'll never get back and my future looks bleak but I'll keep going and hope theres a better tomorrow not just for me but all who suffer with mental health. Take care kit, and everyone here, i hope and wish you's a good and worry free life.

  • @makeu1376
    @makeu1376 5 месяцев назад

    I'm currently having a relapse of a psychotic episode, so I know exactly how you feel. Thank you very much for your honesty. Take care. Be strong. You're a wonderful person.

  • @rubi-roe230
    @rubi-roe230 6 месяцев назад +2

    The process of greiving the person you could have been had things been different is a tough and long one.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +3

      I try not to think about it too hard 😔

  • @damnablethief
    @damnablethief 6 месяцев назад +2

    There is so much that I want to be able to say, but I don't have the words. But I want you to know it is comforting for me to know someone else out there experiences what I experience, and your channel really does help me...ALOT. I know it's tough and shit gets real sometimes, but I wish you the best Kit. For real. Stay in the fight. It's worth it.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад

      I won’t let it beat me. Ever. :)

  • @nicolamustard7232
    @nicolamustard7232 4 месяца назад +1

    Hello honey, I'm new here. Would you believe my diagnosis isn't official yet... I've been dealing with it since I was a kid and I'm now in my 40's. Last I knew, the diagnosis was agitated depression with psychotic features. It gets bad.... Last time I was hospitalized for 10 months. My husband and I have kids. It wasn't good.
    But you know, these illnesses mold us into better people. We can empathize with others on a completely different level. I have a deep faith (Catholic), and it gives me a deeper understanding of suffering and the actual good that can come of it. That's not to be morbid, just an acceptance, and we live the best lives we can with what we're given. No one understands this better than those of us who struggle with these illnesses.
    I'm sorry you're struggling! It is indeed so hard. But suffering in this way makes us resilient in ways no other struggle can.
    I just found your channel. You're a brave and strong young woman. Thank you for your videos and for being so honest about your experiences. Continue the good fight, hun! 😊🙏🏼🕊️

  • @SevenUnwokenDreams
    @SevenUnwokenDreams 6 месяцев назад +1

    I'm sorry you are suffering right now. I hope it's some small comfort to know that you are helping people. You're helping me understand my illness and not feel alone. You just taught me that feeling a presence when no one is there is a hallucination and there's a special name for it. I didn't know that. I didn't know what it was, but in the past I thought there were ghosts following me (my delusions and hallucinations tend to be spiritual in nature). I sometimes feel like I tipped into a different consciousness, or like I'm in an alternate reality because everything looks exactly the way it is supposed to but it feels off, like it's all a sham, a television set or something. I'm always okay in the end too, but yeah. It's exhausting. I'm 32. I think sometimes, wow, I have a few more decades of this stuff? I'm tired. I hope you feel back to yourself very soon.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +2

      They’re “extracampine” hallucinations and are usually experienced by those with Parkinson’s, at least that’s what my research led me to believe. And I used to think they were spirits for sure but now the veil has been lifted. Still freaks me out when it happens though. Stay strong!

  • @mjlove6574
    @mjlove6574 6 месяцев назад +3

    We love You Kit❤

  • @lmg88.80
    @lmg88.80 6 месяцев назад +1

    Music is my outlet during my relapse and recovery too. I have the same diagnosis as you. I'm so glad I was taught to play flute as a child. I go to music and get lost in sounds so I don't think too deeply about the inner thoughts I don't want. It's my saving grace. Music really heals. You can turn your thoughts into fictional songs and poems. You are very articulate 😊

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +1

      I have played piano for nearly 20 years and it’s super helpful! I just play improv for hours and it does help. Sometimes I record it and keep it, most of the time I hear and play it once and never again. Thank you!

  • @beatcause
    @beatcause 6 месяцев назад +2

    Not sure this would s helpful :( but… I used to think that thought a lot “if you only had three years left to live, how would you spend it?” I immediately thought of this TED TALK when watching this. It’s really good. Hey, I love your kindness and compassion and I hope it all comes back to you! Here’s the title of the Ted talk :: My life started when they said it was over | Elin Kjos | TEDxKI

  • @zoealvarez8427
    @zoealvarez8427 6 месяцев назад +2

    im really sorry your having a hard time and thank you for your channel. For a few years how I been hav ing bad delusions and thinking I was being haunted severely. im not going to go into much detail because I know you are not doing well but just know its gotten bad. I been going to the doctor and she hasn't diagnosed me but she keeps mentioning schizophrina and I actually started watching your channel because i didn't know what this was and thought it wasn't bad enough to be schizophrenia potentially and thought it could just be a ghos or something and I was hearing and seeing spirits but you really have a lot of the same things I go through and im not sure if its schizophrenia but you have really given me hope that I can get better from whatever it is and I can have a kinda normal life and grow and thank you for that because I really didn't think I could ever get better. I hope you heal and get better and remember all things pass.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад

      Things do pass, and that goes for you too!

  • @Readmybumpersticker
    @Readmybumpersticker 6 месяцев назад +2

    Sorry to hear you're having a bad time. It sounds like a feeling of dread. I have learnt to see it coming a bit when I start hearing voices. But it still sucks, that feeling of slipping away into a world you know isn't real, but if you get sucked in you can't tell what is real.
    I admire your strength in holding down a job and leading a 'normal' life. Your job sounds pretty cool - yay science :).

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +1

      Yes yay science! And thank you

  • @johnnyrodrigo
    @johnnyrodrigo 6 месяцев назад +1

    I appreciate your vulnerability, honesty, and candidness. I too struggle and take medications and still feel the universe shift. None of us asked for bipolar, schizo, effective disorder and yes, it does suck.
    But your channel has made me feel heard and understood. Thank you!

    • @johnnyrodrigo
      @johnnyrodrigo 6 месяцев назад +1

      ruclips.net/user/shorts8sMfk_ujBR4?feature=shared

    • @johnnyrodrigo
      @johnnyrodrigo 6 месяцев назад +1

      Did the video I sent you work?

    • @johnnyrodrigo
      @johnnyrodrigo 6 месяцев назад

      ruclips.net/user/shorts8sMfk_ujBR4?si=xp195UB-KA_ratfA

  • @davidchilders2437
    @davidchilders2437 6 месяцев назад +1

    Hang in there kit! We all love you!

  • @SheyannaRose
    @SheyannaRose 6 месяцев назад +1

    Thank you for making your channel. It's been very educational for me to learn about your disorder and how it can be somewhat similar to BPD which is what I have. To hear you say "I wish it would stop" and that you didn't ask for any of this. Also that you wish the meds would completely take it away. That's exactly how I feel about my mental illnesses and how it affects my daily life life as well. I feel less alone. I've thought about making a channel about living with BPD but idk how people people can judge you when you're exposing things like this. But again, thank you for making your channel.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад

      Thank you for following my journey! And the more we talk the more normal this stuff becomes, but also know it’s okay to not talk too. It’s whatever works best for you and your experience.

  • @idostuff5766
    @idostuff5766 6 месяцев назад +1

    I'm here to give you a hug kit. You're amazing i love listening to you

  • @endrecsikos4279
    @endrecsikos4279 6 месяцев назад +2

    Hey there, I'm really sorry to hear what you're going through and just wanted to tell you that I think you're an awesome person and I really like your videos! I hope you feel better!

  • @anthonybarnes7667
    @anthonybarnes7667 6 месяцев назад +1

    Thank you for sharing your experience and thoughts. I have the same diagnosis. I always thought it was just how life is for everyone. Still do most days. I swear, that you are very strong and an amazing person. We made it this far, you got this.

  • @lisatomihiro3488
    @lisatomihiro3488 6 месяцев назад +1

    I am so sorry that you are going through a rough time right now, Kit. Praying for you.🙏❤️

  • @soutenu_ninja5678
    @soutenu_ninja5678 6 месяцев назад +2

    This is my life. I feel ya struggles. Thanks for the video 😊

  • @rhuwrong1135
    @rhuwrong1135 6 месяцев назад +1

    I love you. Im proud of you for reaching out to us emedietly whilst youre going thrue this deep deep feelings.

  • @wicdavid
    @wicdavid 6 месяцев назад +2

    If you have others you can turn to, please do. I know it does not fix things, but it helps to not be alone.
    I have been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder depressive type. This thing is at the core of my life ending up with me being alone almost all of the time. I know that it is for life and I honestly feel I can relate to the stress of knowing that. I am sick of being alone even after I have spent years working to try to have others in my life that I can count on when I am 'with it'. The sad thing is that seems to not have been enough as I am alone almost all of the time other than the darn doctors and such. That is not any sort of over-the-top statement. I often have and still do go a week or more with no other people around me other than the bit of online contact. Screen time is not the same as having someone actually here.
    That is more than enough about my situation. The main thing is if you can, be with at least one person to help you and be there. It can make a massive difference and help in more ways than most people seem to understand. Isolation is a living nightmare no matter if you are diagnosed with a mental health condition or not.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +1

      Trying so hard not to isolate, thanks for reinforcing it! I have a great group of friends that’s been helping me and reaching out, I just gotta keep replying to their messages :)

  • @jeffsoto5435
    @jeffsoto5435 6 месяцев назад +2

    Definitely relatable, hugs to you

  • @elysemattocks1495
    @elysemattocks1495 6 месяцев назад +2

    🫂 it's unsettling to go through times like this. I hope this will pass fast. Glad you take such good care of yourself and can be venerable on this channel. I appreciate you !

  • @angeliquesurguy-hershey1752
    @angeliquesurguy-hershey1752 6 месяцев назад

    Kit, I can feel your pain in this video and I can empathize🫂💜. I live with schizophrenia and what you describe is very much like what I experience m and when you said the very minute that you are stressed your psychosis symptoms set in, I was like yes, me too, I def relate and I was tearing up. I'm so sorry! It's hell! When you said how you didn't ask for this, it just broke me. I def understand. It's not fair! It sucks. And you're so right you'll be okay because you always have been. That's exactly and understandable comment. It conveys that feeling that you have to just keep going and being strong. But it also conveys how hard it is and how lonely it is🫂💜. No words will make it better just know there are people that get it. And you are a beautiful person who is doing amazing and helping others like me feel less alone💗

  • @User-kd9ij
    @User-kd9ij 6 месяцев назад +1

    You sound like a very intelligent, articulate, sensitive person. Do you mind if I ask I wonder if it’s like flashbacks of bad memories? I think sensitive people feel pain more strongly and I get those when I don’t rest enough or am under stress and it passes after a little while. Don’t be scared either way, this too shall pass! Just remember you are safe now. You are strong! Get rest and some good sleep. I hope you feel better soon.❤

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +2

      Nope I did not. This is 100% my brain. Thanks so much for the comment and I will get through this!

    • @User-kd9ij
      @User-kd9ij 6 месяцев назад +1

      @@SchizoKitzo I’m happy you are pushing through, on your way to healing💜

  • @tylerogrady8194
    @tylerogrady8194 6 месяцев назад +3

    I'm tapering off of klonopin soon with my DR because of the fact that I'm addicted to it. I'm scared that psychosis will have a rebound effect. I know exactly the off feeling you get when your in those symptoms. I definitely understand what you're going through and wish you the best of luck.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +1

      The off feeling is the worst, good luck with your own meds!

  • @siobhonc
    @siobhonc 6 месяцев назад +1

    I feel you. It is just so hard. The recurrent nature of mental illness sucks.

  • @Jayisjay-g5c
    @Jayisjay-g5c 6 месяцев назад +2

    The "self" is burdened with so much sometimes. Wish I could break it all up and rearrange it sometimes. Remove the great level of importance I sometimes attach to things. The things are just things. All the noise of equals and opposites. Need another self. Hope the meds are helping😊 you feel better. I know schizophrenia can be bizarre.😢😊😊❤

  • @derekpmoore
    @derekpmoore 6 месяцев назад

    I hope you’re feeling better!!!!

  • @roberttravers7587
    @roberttravers7587 6 месяцев назад +1

    Great video! Hope you feel better soon

  • @Leafy_Sees
    @Leafy_Sees 6 месяцев назад

    Kito you are true inspiration..
    I'm sorry that you are in such pain, just remember that you once said your life is worth living, even with all the suffering (which I hope will go away ASAP)

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад

      Life it totes worth living!

  • @Sophia-cd2ci
    @Sophia-cd2ci 6 месяцев назад +1

    Yeah. Psychosis sucks. Sometimes it's really nice to just hear/say/acknowledge that yes, this huge part of everyday and my/your/our life forever sucks. Thank you. Sending love from the southern hemisphere, and hope things start to get easier soon.

  • @UniversalistSon9
    @UniversalistSon9 6 месяцев назад +1

    What sucks and is so sad is that you could be having spiritual experiences but it’s so hard to know what is what..the mind is a pain in ass.

  • @professorJorge11
    @professorJorge11 6 месяцев назад +5

    I have regular schzo , and I live with my parent. My dad is battling cancer and some days I get the weight of all that ( Oh, there's a cure Kit )

  • @SkibbityFlee
    @SkibbityFlee 6 месяцев назад +1

    I Have BPD along with my Schitzoaffective diagnosis. This sounds so much like the dissociative/derealization I deal with from BPD. It is so very scrambled because it feeds into my delusions and shuffles everything around. Hang in there. I feel ya. its rough.

  • @rosalindwebb7729
    @rosalindwebb7729 6 месяцев назад +1

    Sorry you go through this bless you. Thank you for sharing take care. X❤️🌹 I know it’s not nice it’s upsetting. God bless you.x

  • @custardcreambaby
    @custardcreambaby 6 месяцев назад +2

    Thank you for this. Im going through something similar at present and its nice to know im not alone. Feel better soon ❤️‍🩹

  • @HighScore-yh9vc
    @HighScore-yh9vc 6 месяцев назад +1

    Kit, I know exactly what you are talking about it's going on 2 weeks and I'm feeling the same way where thing is off things aren't right tomorrow I get to see my doctor and have a talk with her. I hope you feel better soon.

  • @RiverJumper2
    @RiverJumper2 4 месяца назад +1

    I feel you I also have the same condition, it's hard to deal with

  • @rhheaaldduummontte5132
    @rhheaaldduummontte5132 6 месяцев назад +3

    I’m on my pills but I feel my creativity is gone, it’s quite in my mind but I’m like was I telepathically talking to people before, I go to bed early even snore, my food intake could be greener, sometimes when I call my mom a bitch in my head in real life she gets meaner, it’s smoky where I live sun obscured by a grey smoke blur, I wish my thoughts were purely mine, you’ll get better kit I hope that your fine

  • @joshuapost8564
    @joshuapost8564 6 месяцев назад +1

    I relate with this post too much. Having schitzoaffective is a fun, cruel joke. It piles up like laundry, falls over and then folds itself and puts itself away.

  • @netherfae
    @netherfae 6 месяцев назад

    I just got back from a concert and I got to say, i am not coping well either. I just want to experience normality. Sometimes I just want to be normal. I do want to say though that you aren't alone in this. Schizophrenia is such a pain.

  • @ivanvicente9633
    @ivanvicente9633 6 месяцев назад +2

    The unverse crack thing I can weirdly relate to even though I have never experienced that directly, but it is a way of putting how I feel when dissociationg.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +2

      I can totally see how that might relate!

  • @spxrtzn-vc5oq
    @spxrtzn-vc5oq 6 месяцев назад +1

    yup. all too relatable. last night i was up an extra 2 hrs in bed hearing a young female voice (externally), feeling prescences, being watched etc. weird stuff

  • @blueflury
    @blueflury 4 месяца назад

    This is so relatable :(

  • @alexandermatthewsmusic
    @alexandermatthewsmusic 6 месяцев назад +1

    Im a bit "in it" at the moment too... Its hard sometimes for sure i guess your not alone in it though 😊⭐❤️👑

  • @smerkin5000
    @smerkin5000 6 месяцев назад +1

    Thanks for sharing

  • @jameslewis5131
    @jameslewis5131 6 месяцев назад +2

    "No way of experiencing the reality of anything" U.g krishnamurti.

  • @sylvainslater7496
    @sylvainslater7496 6 месяцев назад +2

    I hear all my voices as internal voices not sure if its common or not but I feel like external would be worse

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад

      I prefer the internal ones. Easier to tell they’re voices 😂

  • @iOnRX9
    @iOnRX9 4 месяца назад

    just had same psychosis

  • @bethdouty4591
    @bethdouty4591 6 месяцев назад +1

    Do you try cognitive behavioral therapy? if so,does it help control the stress that leads to psychosis?For you,does any if your psychosis result from social anxiety or anxiety in general?

  • @transparentghost2817
    @transparentghost2817 Месяц назад +1

    Sometimes when i walk outside and im really fucking stressed, i also get these... weird.. odd.. reality shifts.. like.. everything is fine one second, and the next step i take, its like im stepping into a 2nd dimension.. it dosent matter if i take a step back, i cant "go back" .. Suddently everything is different.. My pulse goes crazy, everything seems... tilted? .. Colours are different.. The same.. But more vibrant.. Suddently my balance gets thrown off.. And i start to wonder if.. is this REAL? ... usually goes away after some time, but it does happens sometimes.. Especially during stressful times..
    Can relate to the "something is putting pressure on my back" aswell. Sometimes it even fucks with my breathing so much, that i suddently feel like im getting a panicattack. That im haveing a heartattack? .. And i KNOW my body is breathing.. Cus i can see it.. I can feel it.. But my brain is telling me, im not getting any air.. Its soo disturbing.

  • @emmajohnson2501
    @emmajohnson2501 6 месяцев назад +1

    I've had psychosis 4 times , I have panic attacks, and I hear voices 😢 and I'm holding onto to be a mum . Will it ever truly be gone?

  • @RickardSvensson-t1u
    @RickardSvensson-t1u 6 месяцев назад +1

    "Don't wanna hear any fucking voices at all even if they're saying i'm alright" - dillinger four

  • @Susanne-qp8vj
    @Susanne-qp8vj 6 месяцев назад +2

    I find your channel very informative and admire your great commitment to this important topic. I'm interested to know if you've considered trying a ketogenic diet. I follow the channel 'Living well with Schizophrenia' by Lauren, who lives with schizoaffective disorder. Despite a sophisticated medication regimen, she has regularly reported on mild to severe symptoms in her posts. For the past five months, she has been following a medical ketogenic diet under professional coaching. She has managed to reduce her medications by 60 percent and feels she has found an incredibly effective therapy. Since starting the dietary therapy, she has not experienced any hallucinations or extreme mood swings. I would be interested in hearing your opinion on the subject. Best regards and all the best.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +2

      Good for her its not for me

  • @cloudbenson5562
    @cloudbenson5562 Месяц назад

    I know what this is like. It can be exhausting. I am slowly working my way out of it at the moment. The toughest aspect is not having anyone to talk with that has experienced it. Do you know of any support groups or would you have time to zoom together? Jon

  • @piperlynne1
    @piperlynne1 6 месяцев назад +2

    I'm not sure if you know about medical Keto and how it can help people with mental illnesses. I was watching videos from "Living Well with Schizophrenia" and she has found some help from her symptoms. She has been able to go down a significant amount in her meds. It may not help everyone but it can be another thing to try to reduce your symptoms. I hope that we find cures for these mental illness soon because it's very difficult for everyone living with them. Hang in there you will feel better.

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +1

      Good for her its not for me

    • @piperlynne1
      @piperlynne1 6 месяцев назад +1

      @@SchizoKitzo Ya it's not for me either but it's good to see other people finding some other ways to lower symptoms.

  • @natalija7098
    @natalija7098 3 месяца назад +1

    How do you manage to be thin with medication?

  • @Vandbærer
    @Vandbærer 6 месяцев назад +2

    Hi Kitz. You might've been asked this before, but I was wondering if it might be possible to program your brain to rather have "safe" psychotic experiences in the sleep-state and be able to then recall it(?) The eccentric magical-thinking dreamer in me kind of wants to tell you that you are a psychic medium of some sort and that the specific "presence" close to you is actually a real person, being blocked, who wants to connect with you and be allowed to give you a hug while you're laying down (especially on your side and when things are going rough in your life). We are sometimes sent the genuine in-between the fake. Don't want to offend anyone here. Your illness is real and there are layers to it that could very well still be hidden from you at present. Please take care. Ciao for now.

  • @ullaskoglund9926
    @ullaskoglund9926 6 месяцев назад +1

    ♥️♥️♥️

  • @Achilles-m5k
    @Achilles-m5k Месяц назад

    I have internal dialogue but I don't hear voices breaks with reality sometimes I get that but I just blame the world..... it's their fault.... always.

  • @maxilia7446
    @maxilia7446 6 месяцев назад +1

    Hi kit, do you work and what kinda work do you do?

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +1

      I do! I’m a lab tech

  • @ivaylohandarov4080
    @ivaylohandarov4080 6 месяцев назад

  • @kinzhe83
    @kinzhe83 6 месяцев назад +1

    I know this might not be a popular opinion but have you considered going back to your parents/parent? That way you would never be alone, I think loneliness is not very helpful for us "mentally sensitive" folks. I know it might be annoying to be requested to go fetch a milk from cellar, if you know what I mean, but at least there's always someone willing to share your burden, and, I'm pretty sure, your parents benefit too, long story short you take care of each other. For example my mother (who is schizoaffective) and I (bipolar I) have same psychiatrist and one time she went from 5 mg of zyprexa to 2,5 mg and her positive symptoms appeared, but I was there to immediately report that to our doctor and she put her back on 5 mg and in just a few days my mother was fine again, and potentially large and damaging episode was prevented. So we sort of "guard" each other, and I think it's super helpful. That's just my short 2 cents on this, I hope and wish you get better soon :)

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +1

      The way I’ve done it with my dad (my main support person) is that while I do technically live on my own, I only live a mile away from him. We talk every day, and often walk the mall a few times a week for a few hours and I see him on the weekends. When I have issues I will sometimes sleep on his couch, or he will come over to my apartment and help there. For now, this plan is working. But it’s not out of the question to move back in with someone at least down the line. I’m just taking it a day at a time. Thanks Kinzhe!

  • @ivaylohandarov4080
    @ivaylohandarov4080 Месяц назад

    I hit rock bottom

  • @AndrewChun791
    @AndrewChun791 5 месяцев назад

    Merecer Cheerleader?😊

  • @elizabethbarmann5361
    @elizabethbarmann5361 6 месяцев назад +1

    🙏💜🩷🙏

  • @michaelward6333
    @michaelward6333 6 месяцев назад +1

    🍎🌲🍺 have you tried tongue placement to the roof of mouth and flexing it till you touch your heart. Or headstands and egg white fasting. 🕊️🧘🏼🕊️ Dao quickly come, ah! ❤️‍🔥👻👻🙏

  • @jameslewis5131
    @jameslewis5131 6 месяцев назад +2

    Were all technically hallucinating reality perception for normies isn't really that accurate either has anybody on here seen the lectures by Anil seth about the brain hallucinating conscious reality. it makes you wonder how anybody's perception of reality is accurate at all.

    • @susantaylor2937
      @susantaylor2937 6 месяцев назад +1

      Follow up with Donald Hoffman and you will have your answer.

  • @mannye21
    @mannye21 6 месяцев назад +1

    What is up SchizoKitzo

    • @SchizoKitzo
      @SchizoKitzo  6 месяцев назад +1

      The sky

    • @mannye21
      @mannye21 6 месяцев назад

      @@SchizoKitzo OOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooohhhh

  • @KevinChristensen-h8x
    @KevinChristensen-h8x 6 месяцев назад +1

    Ya i was schizoeffective bipolar when i was younger. So i went off my medicine and grew up. All the symptoms are from immaturity.

  • @w.okkerse915
    @w.okkerse915 6 месяцев назад +2

    This may be a confronting message for you. A message that may be attacking your identity. But shouldn't you consider a quieter job. Travelling in an air plane is tiresome and nerve wrecking even for a person without stress vulnerabilities. If your job involves this regularly, this seems an enormous challenge

    • @lisbethbird8268
      @lisbethbird8268 6 месяцев назад +1

      She does it for fun, not work.

    • @w.okkerse915
      @w.okkerse915 6 месяцев назад +1

      @@lisbethbird8268
      Well, in that case maybe a more relaxing way to spend your free time is then more appropriate.

  • @Lisa-yc1mn
    @Lisa-yc1mn 6 месяцев назад +2

    Watch Robert breaker how to be saved.

    • @rainygreene9161
      @rainygreene9161 6 месяцев назад +2

      You likely haven't seen her story about how she used to be a believer. I am not going to take it upon myself to share that part of her story. It's not mine to share even though she posted it.
      Second you can't assume someone doesn't know the LORD just because they battle some type of psychotic disorder. You wouldn't say that to someone with cancer just as well as you should never assume it for someone with psychotic symptoms of a mental illness.
      I very much so have a relationship with God and I also battle psychotic symptoms. My relationship with God is absolutely the only thing that gets me through it and sustains me through the days the battle of it makes me wonder why I am still here. I know He has a purpose and I know in that purpose He will use my life to bring glory to Him.

    • @Lisa-yc1mn
      @Lisa-yc1mn 6 месяцев назад +1

      @@rainygreene9161 I did know she was raised Baptist. I just care about her

    • @Lisa-yc1mn
      @Lisa-yc1mn 6 месяцев назад

      @@rainygreene9161 and your a believer and saved or you never believed at all. And your the one assuming. I did have cancer. I know we cant control these diseases

    • @rainygreene9161
      @rainygreene9161 6 месяцев назад

      @@Lisa-yc1mn yes I agree that there are people who thought they believed but never really did believe. I do agree with your first statement.
      Second, I think I didn't communicate what I was trying to say. I never assumed anything nor did I accuse anyone of assuming anything. I was only saying that sometimes people think someone that being saved will totally rid someone of psychotic battles and a lot of those people would never say that to someone who battles something such as cancer. I wasn't saying that is what you were doing and I apologize for not being more thoughtful in how I communicated.
      Also, I hate that you battled cancer. I hope you are doing much better.

    • @rainygreene9161
      @rainygreene9161 6 месяцев назад

      @@Lisa-yc1mn ohhhhh.. I should have said one can't assume. I use you all inclusive a lot not meaning literally the person I am talking to.

  • @Tarpinitaoinô
    @Tarpinitaoinô 6 месяцев назад +2

    smile up.ii.yes.oaghsa.bad good good. closed. suture now. instant. abc sight. dbd. s and p.

  • @leonas3840
    @leonas3840 6 месяцев назад +1

    Well schizophrenia can not be cured with drugs , however it's possible to get cured . But before I can explain to you how it's first important to know the right steps and precautions else the condition can worsen. Please contact me for more information.

  • @gh0stpyram1d
    @gh0stpyram1d 6 месяцев назад

    Thanks for sharing