Exactly, I divorced because of it. He allowed lies about me, alhamdulillah he always believed me but didn't try to stop it at all. It angered me because I always stood up for him but he couldn't do that for me. People have to learn that stopping one of your parents of doing haram isn't disrespectful.
Hey sister, I'm sorry for your struggle I really am and I know I'm a stranger on the internet but just hold tight. You're not a camel, you should not be mistreated and be okay with it. You deserve to be happy and not emotionally or physically or mentally abused. Try and speak to your husband and go and see a sheik and if he refuses to change then leave. Divorce is not the worst thing in the world. A lot of times it's actually the path you take TOWARDS your happiness. Get that stigma out of your head of what people will think or the thought that no one wants to be with a divorce. That's not true and Allah SWT has created the perfect partner for all of us. Do not settle. I'm sure you've survived things in this life that would break other people but your husband should be your peace. Your heaven on earth. Not a further test. If you want I can give you my Instagram if you ever need a stranger to talk to with nothing to lose.
Me too! If it’s not that I came from a non Muslim family, and it would be very difficult for me to raise my son up alone in a non Islamic environment, also financially speaking, I would not stay with him for one more minute!
I think divorce ia the best option first try to talk woth your husband and solve thw matter but if he acts too ignorant still tahn it is better to divorce him because setimes it is better to let go of something
men and women need to adult up! for the sake of their marriage, respect your parents yes, honor them, but your marriage is at risk every time you choose your parents over your spouse, one day the parents will die and children will move out all you have is your spouse if your lucky. and not divorced or stricken will sickness.
No divorce is allowed in the religion can be initiated by any spouse There a whole section about divorce in the holy book regarding the matter. Wife's rights husbands right divorce etiquettes
Very powerful statement. Parents die, children move out, then you're left with each other and you'll be regretful if you spent the time in the middle allowing outside forces to destroy your bond.
Please pray for my friend her father hits her for no reason and abuses her both physically and mentally...like one day she was playing ludo with her sister he came all of sudden yelling at her for playing ludo and said you are 16 now you are not supposed to play you should do the chores and took the board and hit her with it on back which gave her a bruise on back and once she was playing with her cousins he comes in suddenly and holds her by throat and says u r not a kid anymore u are not supposed to play and it made her throat swell she was unable to eat properly for 3 days as she can't swallow due to pain i have urged her to file a complaint but all she says is i don't want to cuz wht ever he does to me he'd still my father and he is the reason am here, he brought me down here on this earth.....please my dear brothers and sisters i request you to pray for her and her father please pray for her father to change his way she even tried to kill herself please ask allah to help her and her father
My parents were abusive to me their daughter but super nice to their son-in-law (you would think he was their son). It is some cultures that puts son-in-laws on a pedestal while ignoring their daughters bcos they think males have more value/power and must be shown respect, daughters are second class citizens.
My mother in law is great, but my father in law treats me like garbage, and my husband has essentially gotten tired of speaking up against him for my sake, and I feel bad because it ruins their relationship...but I shouldn’t, because I’m not the one spewing vile words. Most recently, he flat out lied to my husband about my health history, and I just never want to visit him again, but I’m not sure that’s realistic. I’m just so hurt, and the most I visit, the more broken I become.
He sounds really awful to be around. Does he behave like that with everyone or just you. There really needs to be a healthy balance how much parents and spouse is treated. Some children abandon parents completely whilst others have to endure everything. But children have to take up their own lives too. Well, just have less to do with him in this case.
May Allah guide you accordingly. Ameen. If possible have less and less to do with him.or nothing at all. Tell your husband and m9ther in law if he does not change in behaviour then I will not be around him. And show annoyance whenever he is around.
How come you hint my heart: I have a problem with my wicked mother in law she doesn't like me at all and everything I do pissess her off. But my loved husband always stands up for me and then she starts cursing us . I have been patient but it's becoming too much for me when all my in laws are saying that am a bictch: a witch who witched their brother whenever he stands up with me they think that he has forsaken them what can I do ? It's really killing me
I’ve been through something similar. No matter what happens, it’s always an issue. No matter what I do for them, they’ll never be happy. Alhamdulillah my husband is always by my side. Not because I’m his wife. But because he is a fan of justice. He sees right and wrong and can differentiate. And he’s seen how badly I’ve been treated by his parents (and even how badly they’ve treated my own parents too)... best thing to do is keep distance if things have gone too toxic. In Islam, daughter/son in law have zero obligations towards their parents in laws. And parents in laws have absolutely zero rights on their children’s spouses. So you won’t be sinned for not seeing your in laws. I know this isn’t an ideal solution for many of you, but with what we’ve been going through as a couple by his parents (since literally before we got married to each other), me keeping my distance from them is the best thing to do atm.
@@freehaiqbal4516 No that's not true. In Islam they are quite near to real parents. I know it might sound hard in a toxic environment to even build any good relationship. But that's what Allah wants us to do. Do you not remember how Prophet Muhammad pbuh relative treated him? This is the test of life from Allah. And you will be judged accordingly. Be wise and follow our Prophet's pbuh strategy. Because if we forget our relationships then life will have no meaning and society will loose moral. What is actually happening now. Because our children are watching. I wish you good luck and much patience. The point you are right you don't have to obey them as your own parents. "Obedience of the parents-in-law does not reach the stage of the obedience of one's parents as far as obligation, reward and punishment are concerned." Read Fatwa No: 82200 "The Rights of Parents and Parents In-Law"
Assalamu alaikum sis. Allahumma barik your husband stands up for you. First of all, if she curse him while he didn't do anything wrong her dua against him is haram for her to make and will not be answered. If you don't live with her, try to limit contact to what is necessary. So you can avoid her evilness and avoid also the breaking family ties. Even if it's one message per month will do. Also, thank Allah that you have a husband who protects you. My ex couldn't even tell his mother to stop lie about me. Even when he new it was a lie, which ended up in divorce. So hold on to him in shaa Allah. May Allah bless you
salam sir im from philippines 48yrs old..i converted to islam at 16..married with malaysian.. he passad away 2yrs ago.. i have a son from other man but my mother inlaws took him away from me 10months ago,.. misses him so much to point that i suffered major depression.. i hv no family n friends..my kids left me cos of money on the other side..pls advice
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatoellahi wa barakatu sister. Sister if this is true you fall under the category oppressed. The dua of the oppressed person is always answered alhamdulillah. Make besides your 5 daily prayers a lot of dua, do the istikhara prayer and as soon as you have done that work towards getting your child back. If you're child is in an other country, start with saving money for a plain ticket, if you're in the same city, call the police. My English is not good enough to explain what I mean without sounding rude. What I mean is. After that istikhara prayer you just do what ever it takes. Even when it grabbing your child and run until your feet fall of. Because after Allah, nobody but you have the highest right on your child! May Allah make it easy for you.
Please also make a video on my case. My wife and I have been together for the last 9 years with 3 years of happily married life and a beautiful 2 year old daughter. My wife and I had some differences for the last 3 months now and amongst a sudden tiff 50 days ago she left me and went to her house and now her parents are oppressing me with unusual demands that are not favourable to me and threatening me with dire consequences. They have poisoned my wife so much that my life doesn't wanna come back nor is willing to care about our daughter. She has taken along our daughter, her assets including jewellery and educational certificates credentials and also passport. I am not sure if this was planned. But now they are demanding me to separate myself from my mother and live ask my property share from my mother. For me this is not acceptable. I am traumatized and being harassed and I feel despair now. I have attempted multiple times to counsel my wife but in vain. Everytime I try to talk to her, her parents intervene between and start harassing me. I am going hopeless now. I dont have a father and I am a very plain guy. Please advice.
listen... i wanna give u one advised . but don't tell me u cant because it might help.. that is when her parents harshly talk to u or threats u... then u also give them threat of divorcing their daughter and tell them ur kid will also live with you and you'll win her at court if they didn't give ur kid ... threat them this then youll see.. trust me..
@@redlilly2584 Thank you for the advise. I really appreciate that mam. However, I cant tell them that I will divorce my wife. Since my wifes family is looking for a reason from my side to ensure that they break our relationship and shoot everything from my shoulder and blame me for everything. I am on haqq and I dont wanna resort to that step. I have left my destiny on Allah Swt. He is the best of planners In sha Allah. Please keep me in your dua. JazaakAllah khair. Assalaamualaikum
@@deenaxclusives if they are trying to break your relation . theyll face more harship because their daughter will be burden on them and no one will marry their divorce daughter.. its really tough keeping such daughter...just do what i said
@@redlilly2584 Mam, her father and mother already told that my wife doesn't want to be with me. They are telling openly that if I dont change my house they will not leave my wife and daughter. My wife is playing very badly with my and my daughters life. And she is being influenced by her family and reluctant to understand anything that I am trying to tell her to save our marriage. My wifes parents are very bad and they are searching for a reason to put the blame on me. I will try to see what I can do.
Md Nurul Amin Sayeed dont be afraid of their blame... just do what's best... living like this and being silent to them doesn't help...life is short . Don't think much..amd dont care or think they'll put blame... why dont u blame and shaming them in society. ?
Its not the elderly people fault it's always that daughter in law comes to someone house and ruin that family being to rude to that guy family shouting and yelling at them. Sory to say same thing happend in my family.
If something happened in your family that doesn't mean that it happens everywhere. I agree there are some miserable daughter in laws out there but the ratio is very small. Mostly guy's mother and sisters are the people who manipulates and hurt the new daughter in law and say her all kinds of things, they want to keep control over her son/brother's married life
@@maheenkhalid4709 Well not. Your generation women ruined it and the sad thing is when you will get old your daughter-in-laws will be much more worse. Because she sees how society changed and follows the new ideology.
It's not the words of inlaws that hurt. It's the silence of husband
But being silent is better. Talking often makes it even more worse. So be proud of your husband. Don't see it as weakness.
Spot on!
Absolutely true
Exactly, I divorced because of it. He allowed lies about me, alhamdulillah he always believed me but didn't try to stop it at all. It angered me because I always stood up for him but he couldn't do that for me. People have to learn that stopping one of your parents of doing haram isn't disrespectful.
Inshallah, these type of husbands will be answering for their silence on the day of judgement. I know this pain, bcoz my husband is one of them
My parents are horrible to my husband. May Allah soften their hearts.. 😢I feel really sorry for him. He tries really hard with them but can never win
Not all parents r mature enough to understand children and treat them in right way. Such families r dysfunctional families
Wow I wish all religions would teach the same values in this video. This is incredibly wise and empathetic.
My in-laws are the worst. They treat me like I'm nothing. Husband always take the parents side. I think of divorce on a daily basis
Hey sister, I'm sorry for your struggle I really am and I know I'm a stranger on the internet but just hold tight. You're not a camel, you should not be mistreated and be okay with it. You deserve to be happy and not emotionally or physically or mentally abused. Try and speak to your husband and go and see a sheik and if he refuses to change then leave. Divorce is not the worst thing in the world. A lot of times it's actually the path you take TOWARDS your happiness. Get that stigma out of your head of what people will think or the thought that no one wants to be with a divorce. That's not true and Allah SWT has created the perfect partner for all of us. Do not settle. I'm sure you've survived things in this life that would break other people but your husband should be your peace. Your heaven on earth. Not a further test. If you want I can give you my Instagram if you ever need a stranger to talk to with nothing to lose.
😔😔 so sorry to hear that
Me too! If it’s not that I came from a non Muslim family, and it would be very difficult for me to raise my son up alone in a non Islamic environment, also financially speaking, I would not stay with him for one more minute!
I think divorce ia the best option first try to talk woth your husband and solve thw matter but if he acts too ignorant still tahn it is better to divorce him because setimes it is better to let go of something
@@shabnamyounus2305 may Allah punish them for this! What they did is haram in so many different ways
men and women need to adult up! for the sake of their marriage,
respect your parents yes, honor them, but your marriage is at risk every time you choose your parents over your spouse, one day the parents will die and children will move out
all you have is your spouse if your lucky. and not divorced or stricken will sickness.
wait what? I'm not a muslim but I sometimes look into stuff online. I thought divorce was forbidden unless the husband initiated it?
No divorce is allowed in the religion can be initiated by any spouse
There a whole section about divorce in the holy book regarding the matter.
Wife's rights husbands right divorce etiquettes
Yes!! 100%.
Very powerful statement. Parents die, children move out, then you're left with each other and you'll be regretful if you spent the time in the middle allowing outside forces to destroy your bond.
@@cultofmalgus1310 no it's just 2 different words. For the men talaq, for the women khula
Please pray for my friend her father hits her for no reason and abuses her both physically and mentally...like one day she was playing ludo with her sister he came all of sudden yelling at her for playing ludo and said you are 16 now you are not supposed to play you should do the chores and took the board and hit her with it on back which gave her a bruise on back and once she was playing with her cousins he comes in suddenly and holds her by throat and says u r not a kid anymore u are not supposed to play and it made her throat swell she was unable to eat properly for 3 days as she can't swallow due to pain i have urged her to file a complaint but all she says is i don't want to cuz wht ever he does to me he'd still my father and he is the reason am here, he brought me down here on this earth.....please my dear brothers and sisters i request you to pray for her and her father please pray for her father to change his way she even tried to kill herself please ask allah to help her and her father
My parents were abusive to me their daughter but super nice to their son-in-law (you would think he was their son). It is some cultures that puts son-in-laws on a pedestal while ignoring their daughters bcos they think males have more value/power and must be shown respect, daughters are second class citizens.
Here in india Pakistan, most marriages end up because of family. Its sad!
In india tooo
My mother in law is great, but my father in law treats me like garbage, and my husband has essentially gotten tired of speaking up against him for my sake, and I feel bad because it ruins their relationship...but I shouldn’t, because I’m not the one spewing vile words. Most recently, he flat out lied to my husband about my health history, and I just never want to visit him again, but I’m not sure that’s realistic. I’m just so hurt, and the most I visit, the more broken I become.
May Allah ease your pain.
He sounds really awful to be around. Does he behave like that with everyone or just you. There really needs to be a healthy balance how much parents and spouse is treated. Some children abandon parents completely whilst others have to endure everything. But children have to take up their own lives too. Well, just have less to do with him in this case.
May Allah guide you accordingly. Ameen. If possible have less and less to do with him.or nothing at all. Tell your husband and m9ther in law if he does not change in behaviour then I will not be around him. And show annoyance whenever he is around.
May Allah grant you ease, aameen. Going through a similar situation.
ماشاءاللہ
Nice lecture. Sir
I was kicked out of my house after nikkah...and had to live in a garage...kicked out by my father...
Then wot u did
I need help
How come you hint my heart: I have a problem with my wicked mother in law she doesn't like me at all and everything I do pissess her off. But my loved husband always stands up for me and then she starts cursing us . I have been patient but it's becoming too much for me when all my in laws are saying that am a bictch: a witch who witched their brother whenever he stands up with me they think that he has forsaken them what can I do ? It's really killing me
Your language tells me you have a big share in the way you are perceived. Please watch your language. You see how things will improove. Thank you! 😊
I’ve been through something similar. No matter what happens, it’s always an issue. No matter what I do for them, they’ll never be happy. Alhamdulillah my husband is always by my side. Not because I’m his wife. But because he is a fan of justice. He sees right and wrong and can differentiate. And he’s seen how badly I’ve been treated by his parents (and even how badly they’ve treated my own parents too)... best thing to do is keep distance if things have gone too toxic. In Islam, daughter/son in law have zero obligations towards their parents in laws. And parents in laws have absolutely zero rights on their children’s spouses. So you won’t be sinned for not seeing your in laws. I know this isn’t an ideal solution for many of you, but with what we’ve been going through as a couple by his parents (since literally before we got married to each other), me keeping my distance from them is the best thing to do atm.
@@freehaiqbal4516 No that's not true. In Islam they are quite near to real parents. I know it might sound hard in a toxic environment to even build any good relationship. But that's what Allah wants us to do. Do you not remember how Prophet Muhammad pbuh relative treated him? This is the test of life from Allah. And you will be judged accordingly. Be wise and follow our Prophet's pbuh strategy. Because if we forget our relationships then life will have no meaning and society will loose moral. What is actually happening now. Because our children are watching. I wish you good luck and much patience. The point you are right you don't have to obey them as your own parents. "Obedience of the parents-in-law does not reach the stage of the obedience of one's parents as far as obligation, reward and punishment are concerned." Read Fatwa No: 82200 "The Rights of Parents and Parents In-Law"
Assalamu alaikum sis. Allahumma barik your husband stands up for you. First of all, if she curse him while he didn't do anything wrong her dua against him is haram for her to make and will not be answered. If you don't live with her, try to limit contact to what is necessary. So you can avoid her evilness and avoid also the breaking family ties. Even if it's one message per month will do. Also, thank Allah that you have a husband who protects you. My ex couldn't even tell his mother to stop lie about me. Even when he new it was a lie, which ended up in divorce. So hold on to him in shaa Allah. May Allah bless you
@@abinyturbo4x476 no, you don't have to obey your in laws. The only rights they have over you are the general rights that count for every Muslim.
salam sir im from philippines 48yrs old..i converted to islam at 16..married with malaysian.. he passad away 2yrs ago.. i have a son from other man but my mother inlaws took him away from me 10months ago,.. misses him so much to point that i suffered major depression.. i hv no family n friends..my kids left me cos of money on the other side..pls advice
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatoellahi wa barakatu sister. Sister if this is true you fall under the category oppressed. The dua of the oppressed person is always answered alhamdulillah. Make besides your 5 daily prayers a lot of dua, do the istikhara prayer and as soon as you have done that work towards getting your child back. If you're child is in an other country, start with saving money for a plain ticket, if you're in the same city, call the police. My English is not good enough to explain what I mean without sounding rude. What I mean is. After that istikhara prayer you just do what ever it takes. Even when it grabbing your child and run until your feet fall of. Because after Allah, nobody but you have the highest right on your child! May Allah make it easy for you.
Masha Allah 💖❤
Please also make a video on my case.
My wife and I have been together for the last 9 years with 3 years of happily married life and a beautiful 2 year old daughter. My wife and I had some differences for the last 3 months now and amongst a sudden tiff 50 days ago she left me and went to her house and now her parents are oppressing me with unusual demands that are not favourable to me and threatening me with dire consequences. They have poisoned my wife so much that my life doesn't wanna come back nor is willing to care about our daughter. She has taken along our daughter, her assets including jewellery and educational certificates credentials and also passport. I am not sure if this was planned. But now they are demanding me to separate myself from my mother and live ask my property share from my mother. For me this is not acceptable. I am traumatized and being harassed and I feel despair now. I have attempted multiple times to counsel my wife but in vain. Everytime I try to talk to her, her parents intervene between and start harassing me. I am going hopeless now. I dont have a father and I am a very plain guy. Please advice.
listen... i wanna give u one advised . but don't tell me u cant because it might help.. that is when her parents harshly talk to u or threats u... then u also give them threat of divorcing their daughter and tell them ur kid will also live with you and you'll win her at court if they didn't give ur kid ... threat them this then youll see.. trust me..
@@redlilly2584 Thank you for the advise. I really appreciate that mam. However, I cant tell them that I will divorce my wife. Since my wifes family is looking for a reason from my side to ensure that they break our relationship and shoot everything from my shoulder and blame me for everything. I am on haqq and I dont wanna resort to that step. I have left my destiny on Allah Swt. He is the best of planners In sha Allah. Please keep me in your dua. JazaakAllah khair. Assalaamualaikum
@@deenaxclusives if they are trying to break your relation . theyll face more harship because their daughter will be burden on them and no one will marry their divorce daughter.. its really tough keeping such daughter...just do what i said
@@redlilly2584 Mam, her father and mother already told that my wife doesn't want to be with me. They are telling openly that if I dont change my house they will not leave my wife and daughter. My wife is playing very badly with my and my daughters life. And she is being influenced by her family and reluctant to understand anything that I am trying to tell her to save our marriage. My wifes parents are very bad and they are searching for a reason to put the blame on me. I will try to see what I can do.
Md Nurul Amin Sayeed dont be afraid of their blame... just do what's best... living like this and being silent to them doesn't help...life is short . Don't think much..amd dont care or think they'll put blame... why dont u blame and shaming them in society. ?
Salaams ,I have a question, but I need to ask you privately Mufti
Salam can i ask a q
After a long time video uploaded..
According to islam and as well as in other religion it is said that a person will be resposible of his ancestors sins ! How it is possible and why
That is definitely not part of islam. All adults are responsible for themselves and their own sins.
Its not the elderly people fault it's always that daughter in law comes to someone house and ruin that family being to rude to that guy family shouting and yelling at them. Sory to say same thing happend in my family.
Not always dear...Don't blame the innocent ones suffering each and every second by their in-laws
That’s why they should live separately
Ha! This must be a mother in law. YES, IT OFTEN IS THE ELDERLY’s BAD BEHAVIOR. It CAN be the new child in law, but parents in law can also be POISON.
If something happened in your family that doesn't mean that it happens everywhere. I agree there are some miserable daughter in laws out there but the ratio is very small. Mostly guy's mother and sisters are the people who manipulates and hurt the new daughter in law and say her all kinds of things, they want to keep control over her son/brother's married life
@@maheenkhalid4709 Well not. Your generation women ruined it and the sad thing is when you will get old your daughter-in-laws will be much more worse. Because she sees how society changed and follows the new ideology.