What is a Christian Marriage really like? W/ Preston Perry
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- Опубликовано: 6 июл 2024
- Have you ever wondered what a Christian Marriage is really like?
It can be difficult to know what to expect from marriage when you haven't been married and It can be very difficult to know who / what information to trust. Being that there is a lot of conflicting information available, in this episode, @apologeticswithprestonperr4060 uncovers the “truth about marriage” (from a biblical perspective) and helps level set expectations. Preston Perry is a spoken-word poet, performing artist, and teacher from the Southside of Chicago. He and his wife Jackie Hill Perry are Christian leaders and have a great podcast @WithThePerrys
Time Stamps:
0:00 - intro
2:02 - How Preston and Jackie met
5:24 - Did Preston know Jackie is the one?
7:18 - What is a Christian marriage like?
12:35 - If marriage is so hard why do it?
27:54 - How can you know if the sex will be good if you are waiting till marriage?
31:42 - Are gender roles biblical?
48:34 - How to prepare for marriage when you have never seen a good marriage?
53:15 - Shaq asks if boyfriends and girlfriends should get "husband / Wife Treatment"
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Marriage is not the cure and singleness is not a disease.
Imma write this down!!!🎯🎯
Pastor Terry Anderson 🙌🏿 👏🏿 🙏🏿
Powerful
Marriage is not a disease either. It's a covenant from God. There's nothing wrong with desiring marriage either, just understanding the why and who
Yes
I’m a 24 year old virgin, and man I ain’t finna lie😅 the hunger has been unbelievable! It’s been hard, but every time I talk to other guys about it, at first it’s an argument of disbelief, then it goes to “how you do it” then it’s “I wish I were you man ”.
It then reminds me why I’ve been abstaining for so long. How beautiful will it be to be able to tell my kids that their mother is the only person I’ve been with, and they were the result of it.
“How will you know if you’re going to lay it down if you haven’t had sex before?” Well, look at it like this. If you go around enjoying different ice cream flavours, you won’t be able to appreciate the one God intended for your taste buds. The best way to kill something is to compare it.🤷🏽♂️
If it’s both our first time, we get to learn one another, together. Without any comparison!
Amen brotha. I’m 22 and wish I could go back. Practicing celibacy now but there’s nothing like waiting for that special person and time. Keep goin man💯💪🏿
I applaud you! Continue to hold on to your virginity for the special person God has for you! Because like many, I too, wish I could have held my virginity for my special person! I know it’s hard but you got this . Stay close to God word, ensure that your community meaning the people you associate with understand and respect your moral and values! If they go against what you know to be right according to the WORD, it’s time to remove yourself. Blessing
@@joemilleriv The blood that was shed on that cross has already wiped it all away brother! You got this! Also, thank you man, let’s stay rooted in the Christ!
@@patricerodgers6099 I too applaud you for turning a new leaf! You’ve got this. Thank you so much! You know what’s beautiful about having a relationship with Christ? The endless Grace and Love!
So true!
I've watched Preston and Jackie's relationship and she's softened in her demeanor over the years. It's almost like their marriage is healing her from her past.
I agree soo much!! its kinda amazing to see
Marriage to the right person
You can tell when a marriage centers God because it’s a blessing and a ministry to all involved! I love that Preston and Jackie were friends first.
That's the way it should be, The husband helps the wife heal, through his unconditional love, and the wife is there for the husband as well through her respecting him. And with communicating and hearing each others hearts, and validating each other.
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Two men discussing what to expect in a biblical marriage. I'm here for this!
Two BLACK Men 🙌🏾
Me too!!!
Facts!!
Awesomely transparent conversation! I agree "the Church" should be doing more to prepare but not before being an honest example of what marriage is. Maybe the first step can be a seasoned couple mentoring; walk alongside a newly wedded couple; creating boundaries of course. ❤️
My husband just told me he wants a divorce. I am devastated. I am a believer but he isn’t - I have not been perfect. Please pray for us if you see this 💔
Hey love. I just did for you. God is the God of what seems impossible. I’m a newlywed myself, but my husband and I went through some EXTREME rough patches for years before we got married that made me want to leave him several times. At one point I pretty much did. The Bible says that by faith a woman shall save her husband, 1 Corinthians 7:14-16. And no, I don’t go around thumping scripture lol. That’s just one of a few I am keen on. I’m sure you’ve heard of what it means to be unequally yoked, but I am not saying that to make you feel bad. While that is true and it can make things harder, God is ABLE and He can bring those that don’t believe to Him through those of us that do. You have not been perfect? Sweetheart, none of us have or ever will be. That is common for EVERY one of us walking this earth. Even in my relationship I wasn’t perfect to him either, no matter what he did or didn’t do. What you have been is the only Bible and sermon your husband has likely read or heard or seen or listened to. He qualified you to be the believer your husband chose to marry, flaws and all. That means something. Don’t doubt God. Trust Jesus, and His will be done, whether you are meant to stay in your marriage or not. But I am a very optimistic person and I believe it will turn around even at the midnight hour 😊.
Praying sis I can’t imagine how heartbreaking this is 💛
Praying 😢
🙏🏾
Praying for your support system to surround you with love. I hope you pray for peace and understanding to accept what's coming. I hope you feel Him.
"If God gave us a spouse that met our conditions, we wouldn't learn how to live unconditionally."
Love it! ❤️
“If God gave us a spouse that met our every condition we wouldn’t learn how to love unconditionally” - Preston Perry
🤯
That’s good stuff!
That was the same reaction I had when I heard this
Yes, this is a wonderful statement.
Words from someone seeks the Lord❤ Amen
Yeah it is great! I think I heard Paul Washer say something like this before
"every condition" THAT'S CUTE an escape clause😆
I wish the church prepared us ALL better for marriage!
We must stop being so addicted to falling in love!! Marriage is about selfless and sacrifice! If you can’t abide by those tenants you may need to examine your heart!
“Obeying Jesus is not just not sinning but listening to all the wisdom he is giving you so you won’t be tempted to” whew Chilee 🥴
I think that he is absolutely right that the role of the husband culturally is not esteemed. There is so much focus on being a wife but not the actual role and severity of what a husband should be.
Amen
Bullseye 🎯
Preach
I love that you used the word severity. That's such a great word to describe the calling of a husband
Agreed
I been married for 1 year and it has been difficult. You have to look God to fulfill all your needs and know that no human being could ever love you the way God does. It's important to love God above everyone and everything.
Amen so so true.
Amen!!!Beautifully said.
Start smiling in general, especially 4 pics.
Proverbs 15:13.
What are some general things that have been difficult?
@@thensaidJacob the usual: $, sex, kids (if they have any), in-laws. If you're gonna marry, take her to divorce court. Open to the public. Free premarital counseling. Talk through the issues. Dose of reality I swear, lol
It’s actually good to be friends before you rush anything. Friendship builds trust
🎯
Many men try, then the women they try this with get taken by men who simply state they would prefer to start being in a relationship instead of being friends first
@gintoki_sakata__ not every friend is supposed to be your wife. The ones who chose someone else belonged with someone else.
@gintoki_sakata__ not every friend is supposed to be your wife. The ones who chose someone else belonged with someone else.
@@meh3766 my point is, you were friends with the purpose of getting to know each other to later be in a relationship. Since she gets taken, you've wasted a lot of time on the wrong woman
The friendship route is a waste of time
You can tell these men are in two completely different mindsets. The man being interviewed gets it.
Marriage works if you put God first. I met my wife when I was not looking and God has moved in so many ways from the day that we met till the day that we got married. I can definitely relate to the purity part this is the kind of podcast that we need
As a person who waited until marriage to have sex with my husband, listen God knows what you like!!! My husband is the only one I didn't test drive. He is the BEST lover I have ever had!!! God knows what you want. He got you.
This was encouraging because so many times we get told that our God sent spouse will be people that aren’t attractive as long as their heart is good. But God knows what we like !
@@charlinecharlostin3188 Honey, God knows what you like!! 😂🥰 My husband is FINE!!! That man has the body and the heart. I am NOT complaining. Period.
@@shaelovesJesus To God be the glory because now I’m excited. I’m so glad I didn’t settle. I heard God sends him when you least expect it, but I surrendered the idea of marriage to the Lord.
This got me excited because I have heard so many times how looks aren't important and sex is also not that important. And it kinda makes me feel a little sad sometimes.
@@charlinecharlostin3188 I definitely wasn't looking for him. I was cool with my focus being God and my daughter. I desired to be married but i was okay if I didn't. It took me along time to be content in singleness. I'm glad I didn't get marry when I wanted to. I wasn't ready then. I had things I needed to heal from before my husband came into the picture.
“Marriage is the opportunity to grow in your Jesus likeness.” I love that! 🙌🏾💯
The part where he said don’t act like you’re married before you are really hits and makes so much sense. Give your heart time for what’s about to happen. I was in a whole 4 year situationship and I felt like I was married. But I cut it off..best thing I could’ve done. I felt like it was what I wanted but in reality it’s just holding me back from growing and being who God made me to be.
Thank you for your transparency.
4 years? 😮💨 you didn’t want to marry after that long? What held you back?
Lawd I’m the wife, and I needed this. My reaction is who was going to tell me had I not listened to this? Confessing my pridefulness 🤚.
Your husband would probably tell you if you listen
The bible tells us if we would pay attention to the word.
18 years with my wife and these brothers are 🔥🔥
I thought men like this did not exist anymore 😢❤❤❤❤😢😢😢 honestly a lot of men say marriage and monogamy is for Christian people and they are not or they would call it religion but when I read God’s word he shows me otherwise God Bless the men that genuinely believe in your word and marriage let them be examples to what a Godly marriage should be like ❤
Great video, I was in a beautiful marriage before my now ex wife left me,i still love her and most times i cant stop thinking about her, i am doing my very best to get rid of the thought of her, but i just cant, i love her so much, i dont know why i am bring this here for, i cant stop thinking about her..
@jay pritchett Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive
If you want a godly marriage I wouldn’t consult a caster or healer- I’m sure God can reveal what is needed if you believe you are suppose to be with your wife. Let the Lord do the work because he knows all things
Praying for you Juande
You literally just have soul ties .
This man is full of wisdom , God bless him my mind is blown 🤯 with how he correlates Adam and Eve with the answer to the question. ,” are gender roles biblical ?” He made Genesis sound like a whole new book to me , idc how many times I read it . God is so strategic and intentional 🥲
It’s paramount to remember the biblical way verses societies way 💯 . Corruption at its finest
I love that Mr. Perry kept it real. People think that marriage is going to be perfect and easy because we both love God and that’s not reality. Satan hates marriage so he always going to attack it. If God both husband and wife have a relationship with God and they put him first in the marriage they will overcome anything Satan throws at them.
Sex is wonderful when shared in a safe loving marriage. Marriage matters.
You said a mouthful. Safety matters. Biblical marriages were not always safe as we read. Conversations like this teach us that being secure in womenhood and manhood creates a safe space.
The reason why so many of us worry about how sex will be in marriage it’s because we spend so much time fornicating, watching pornography, and just expose ourselves to so much sexual immorality. The cure for all of that is to live a Godly life. If both the man and the woman weren’t fornicating before marriage then whatever happens sex wise in their marriage will be good to them because that’s all they know.
If you’re reading and you have and still are fornicating (like I used), it’s not too late. REPENT and submit to Jesus. Start living a life consecrated to Jesus and He will purify your desires and you’ll look at sex differently.
Live Godly Lives!!
Preston's wife, Jackie Hill-Perry has an amazing testimony.
I’m single never been married! I prayed for a wife and crickets!! God answered my prayer, by not answering it! I love my single life and it’s flexibility and lack of drama! Just got back from Berlin Germany!!
This young man has become soo wise!!! It’s beautiful to witness. Thank you Preston for submitting to God.
A marriage with the Lord inside, also both people on the same frequency is the most beautiful marriage ever to be had. It's built on a solid rock. The rock is Jesus. It takes time to build.
I purely understood what they are saying about being a fixers. I am a fixer also. It can cause lots of trouble in your marriage. I had to learn you can't fix people only God can. It is the Holy Spirit's job to fix us.
I always love getting a man/husband’s perspective on Christian marriage but everything you said is sooo true Preston! me and my husband are in year 4 and we FINALLY are coming together as a unit so I’m grateful for the grace of God allowing us both to stick it out. also, pride in a marriage is a real thing. it’s such a stronghold and can be dangerous if God doesn’t deal with your heart
Great interview. When he said “I became more of a pharaoh-see than Jesus.” That hit home. Women want to be heard and listened to and not needing their partner to fix something majority of the time. What an honest conversation this was.
When people say test drive and how will you know if it's good etc.. In my opinion sex doesn't keep a marriage or a relationship. If you feel as though you're not connected to a person unless you are having sex with them or touching them then that's not a good foundation to build your relationship on. Relationships need a genuine connection in order to sustain a relationship. This includes a genuine unconditional love and respect for one another. These things outlast any thing that's tangible because trust me you see marriage and relationships fall apart everyday and I guarantee it wasn't because of sex.
The Godly wisdom that rests on Preston is really amazing. Flesh & blood did not reveal these things to him... definitely Holy Spirit inspired. It’s truly allowing Christ into your real-life experiences... this is the ONLY way for Christian men to truly discover what it means to love their wives as Christ loves the church. Great discussion 👌🏾🔥
Great job, Preston. Thank you for teaching the young men and the old. And the women. God has done a great work in you .
Amen
“Your spouse’ sin will always expose yours”….👍🏿
The Interviewer asked such smart and necessary questions. Always a pleasure listening to Preston Perry! Lovely episode 👌
Preston is so wise! And the host asked good questions. This was very insightful. Thanks guys!
Exactly ❤️ 💯
What Preston said about 'giving your spouse room to grow' made me think of Adam in the garden cultivating and nurturing it to do what God created it to do- flourish and reflect His beauty. Wow. Thank You, Lord.
I love when Preston and Jackie speak!!! They are both soooo full of wisdom!
We have to normalize that marriage/relationships are not perfect!!!! They’re work & teach us to love someone unconditionally!!
Preston speaks with much wisdom. 🙏🏽
I’m a wife and this convo is on point, we as a nation need to humble ourselves and pray. God help us all to follow your lead.🙏🏽❤️
This was beautiful! Me and my husband watched it together! & it helped us both! We need more transparent BIBLICAL BASE conversations like this! God Bless you both!
Conversations like this our essential,
God bless the both of you.
The guy at 52 minutes is so right. Some women do want to be treated like a wife while dating. But I think what they truly want is security. In my opinion, women will give wife privileges too soon out of fear. If they don’t do it, another woman will which leads to a false sense of security. You’re sleeping with him, moved in with him, and cook for him, so he’s not leaving. This then leads to some men prolonging marriage for 5yrs, 10yrs, 20yrs, etc. I know so many women who settle in these situations. The man takes forever to lead the relationship in that direction because they don’t need to.
Wife/husband will come if you don’t idolize it but be the person God wants you to be and that will attract that person much faster than our own way
The church cannot prepare until it repairs itself.
Every marriage is very different! Always putting GOD first is crucial!!!! Reflecting on yourself and letting go of selfish desires is also crucial. Sacrifice is a major factor.
This interview blessed me so much to be content with just resting and healing in God's presence until this season in my life comes. We see marriages falling apart all around us and to be reminded that a solid marriage really starts with each person's mindset and relationship with Christ is so important!
I will also add that I thought the discussion on men being "esteemed" was very interesting! In between the lines, I felt like the interviewer was trying to hint at the man in the relationship being "more valuable". I have noticed this sort of notion floating around quite a bit throughout social media. I feel like men and women have to be careful with making one role "more important" than the other because both are needed and neither is "easy". Stay blessed folks and keep growing! 🦋🙏🏾
definitely got those red pill vibes from the interviewer. it's really getting into the church.
8:59-9:05 is a gold bar for all Biblical marriages for all time.
That’s powerful Preston!
When Preston said that Jackie shut down after getting married, I felt that. The vulnerability make me the same way. I was scared!!!! 😂
As a woman, I’ve often had that same thought that I’m glad I don’t have the responsibility of being a husband. When God gives instruction to two people and one of them is to be like Jesus, that’s tough. There’s a big amount of respect demanded for a man who actually walks in that. I’m glad it doesn’t have to be me, but even more so I honor that role. Truly, the better a man walks in what God called him to do in marriage, the easier it is for a woman to. Literally how Jesus’s love for the church draws the church to submit to Him.
This is phenomenal!!! Whew!! Men and women both can learn from this interview!!! We need more men thinking this way! Men that their worship aligns with their words!! Not perfect men, but men in position to receive their promise all while praising and giving Glory and honor to God!! Whewwwwwwwww!!! This interview needs 10 million views!!!!! 🙏🏽 God, keep using Preston!!!! In Jesus name!!!! I was screaming!! 😫😂😂😂❤️❤️
I'm in tears!!! That's really Christ's love!!! ❤
Yes!!! Christ like leadership is sacrificial and sometimes it’s not always about getting the credit. That spoke to me! Speak on it!! God is good!
It can only be God who can give you such wisdom and understanding!
Preston just set me free in my parenting with that story his aunt told him. Thank you.
This man is allowing me to grow and giving me to room to come out of my shell.” Great advice on how patient a spouse should be.
Brothers laying down the True Principles, Language and Laws of Marriage... Yesssss, Brothers and Sisters ListenUP!💯🗝 🙌🏽💪🏽🙏🏽
The Holy Spirit spoke straight through you on this one timely and so insightful. Thank you 🙏🏾
This is everything! ❤
Great conversation!!
Loved this!!
Great convo. Bless you guys
This was so needed!
Wow, really blown away. Needed this 🙏🏾
This was soooo good to listen to!! 🙏🏾
great conversation thx for sharing 🙌
this was amazing!! thank you both!🙌🏽❤️
Grateful for this episode. Thank you fam 💕
So beautifully said...
Absolutely enjoyed this conversation❤️
This was such a good conversation. Thank you!
I love seeing you do this Josh!!! God bless your ministry
This was beautiful to see.
Such a necessary convo! 🙌🏽🫶🏽
I really appreciated this conversation 🙌🏽❤️
Thus conversation was beautiful and full of wisdom. Thank you both!
Good teaching.💕
That was an amazing interview! I believe God has sent me my husband that I am currently dating and going into our relationship it was all flesh. We now have pulled back and sometimes struggle to stay pure and please God. We both love God and want the best for each other. I did all the things described cook, clean, pray and sex. Now being convicted by the Spirit saying you me I am
not his wife! Yet 😅 I must demonstrate that yes I showed you all these things and now I’m showing you that I was acting out of my flesh not my spirit. If it’s meant for us to be together than we will. However I want to please God more than I want to get married 🤷🏽♀️
I need to watch this twice because there is so much wisdom shared!! 🙌🏾
Thank you for this content, Fam 🌻
Need more of these convos. A gem for this generation
"Love sacrificially"🔥🔥🔥🔥😭
Wow this was so good. Real talk!! Thanks❤
I love following the Perry’s ministries! Great interview, Preston! God bless!
It is refreshing to hear such wisdom
Straight fire. What a blessing this podcast was!
Gentlemen that's for the episode! Great information and thanks for sharing!
This advice and wisdom needs to be in a book - very good!
Great conversation
A lot of wisdom has been shared. I’m so appreciative.
The amount of peace I feel after this interview in undescribed.
Love the way you answered and targeted each question. 👏🏻
Preston, you keep saying that churches need to prepare people better for marriages in SO many podcasts.
This topic should be your next book!
That would be an amazing book!
Preston dropping BARS AND GEMS as usual. Dope!
Iron sharpens iron and I promise, since following The Perry’s, I have truly seen beautiful fruit in my (second ) marriage. I truly appreciate their testimony and how they encourage believers to seek God and stand firm on His word. Your ministry has blessed so many, greatly! Thank you❤ Many blessings to you 🙏🏾🕊️