I once had a lady book in after a bullet vibrator got swallowed up. Took everything in me not to ask if it was still vibrating in there and if the battery was a duracel extra long life 😅
Who is lying about that lol? Like the embaressing part is you put something in your butt. How is it less embaressing that its a candle instead of something else that doesnt belong up there?
I've told my nieces and students, "Don't put anything in your body you don't want to explain to a doctor how it got there." The students usually ask more questions and I say, "You think about what I said and come back to me next week with a question, not now." Usually one kid per class will come back with, "Miss did you mean our butts or our nose." The answer is always Yes.
I remember being told in elementary school the only thing you should stick up your nose is your elbow. Some class clowns then proceeded to attempt it for laughs.
@@maddietourmaline46Popcorn seed got me as a child, when I laughed because my sister laughed. Sucked it up in my nose way up in the back! Mama started freaking out, laughter had turned to crying, then… with all my might, all 50 pounds of myself gave out such a hard and fast blow to not only dislodge freakin popcorn seed from my right nare, it was so fast and forceful that the seed got hot and I thought my nostril was going to explode because the popcorn seed popped! Craziest things happen in real life. 🟡👃🔥☄️🍿😂
@@craterglass Say we get into the pants and through the underwear, and through the cheeks we can't open, and into the forbidden orifice. Say we do all that, we're just supposed walk out the back door without getting stopped?
I work in a pathology lab. My favorite object we've received is a peanut butter jar with a broken shoelace tied around it. They had a plan, it just didn't work.
I bet like over 99% of these cases are people who can't get appropriate sex toys for that, like a man that's married to a woman or a guy who lives in a religious household
I recently heard some guy put a light bulb up his ass... I don't think I have to say why this is a bad idea... Also it shattered when he tried to remove it... Glass splitters, literally everywhere...
@@macaronsncheese9835 u can order these things on the Internet without the package saying what's inside, or even which shop it really came from😂 that's no excuse anymore. I mean the delivery person may know what kind of shop u ordered from, but they also sell things like condoms, so absolutely no reason to be ashamed 😅 (not that there is anyways) And yeah, choosing something which could just shatter inside u is so weird😅
Either that or they have parents who are against buying one of said onjects and have no way to buy one without parents finding out, but agreed, out of all the goddamn options, why glass?!@@macaronsncheese9835
@@Cara-39I have no idea but isn’t there insurance stuff? If you say “I was bored and decided to put X in the butt” can’t insurance say that it is self inflicted damage and give you trouble with payment? If you say “I accidentally fell on X” it is an accident and insurance can’t proof it is not.
@@robbspace7731 I feel like there's a very strong argument that the need for medical intervention is unintentional, even if the original action of insertion is intentional. Also, the policy would need to exclude self-inflicted injuries. To know what's covered or not covered in an insurance contract, you need to know the language of the specific contract, the policies of the company, and what's actually legal. They could deny the claim illegitimately, but then it's a legal and economic concern as to whether it's worth fighting over.
@@robbspace7731if you lie about the mechanism it could be cause for getting extra screening and care through insurance. Sitting on a bottle versus falling on one can have very different effects on your internal organs. More diagnostics would have to be done to ensure no rupture in your colon was observed.
You know, like how we all walk through our garden naked with our cucumbers sticking straight up in the air and pre cut off the main plant. Very realistic scenario, especially in February lol.
Basically - your colon is LONG and likes to squeeze. Item goes in butt -> gets squeezed up into colon. You can't remove it or try to force it back out. At best, it needs to be manually removed by a doctor. Embarrassing and you'll be sore. At medium, it needs to be surgically removed by a doctor. At worst, it perforates your colon and you have infection in your abdominal cavity or even sepsis. Use a flared base please.
9.9 times out of 10 it was an old man that was saying "in not some kind of *homophobic slur* Like sir I actually feel bad about how self hating you are but it's obvious you're gay lol
There probably are a few people that actually have accidentally sat or fell on sonething in a freak incident and know damn well no one is going to believe them
🤣 people are hilarious. Just own it. It's embarassing yea, but at least it's a funny story, and ER staff have seen that type of shit (and way wilder shit) plenty of times. Trying to lie about it just makes it even more embarassing, cuz it's not like the staff are stupid enough to actually believe that lol. Like whoopsie just sat down and a whole thermos slipped up my ass 😭 C'mon now. Even if we wanna entertain that claim and say it's hypothetically true, that means you already have the loosest gaping anus and musta already been voluntarily shoving that up there on the regular LOL 🤣
Like, are people's butt cheeks so flat and wide open, while having a loose butthole to where something can be "oops accidentally sat on it" can happen? Like, imo seems impossible to happen outside of this one sad video I seen where a guy fell? Jumped and landed on a pole, went halfway up him and he died, they couldn't find out how to remove him, etc. Only extreme falls can that happen, and imo you'd be in immediate danger and pain if that happened, not embarrassing and slowly telling health staff about it, that is a sign of someone who did something they know they shouldn't have, like people who shove stuff up their noses. I would know, as a small child I shoved a bead up my nose.
@@Watery_Tart That can go for just about anything. "Even if you don't think someone's stupid enough to do it, someone somewhere sometime was probably stupid enough to do it."
When my husband was an intern, he was called into the ER to consult on a rectal foreign object. He showed up and was like “why am I needed?” They said “you’re the surgical intern.” He was like “actually I’m the neurosurgical intern… but I still want to keep this case because I HAVE to know the outcome” 😂
Hospital security here, if you put stuff in yourself that isn't made to go up there, it will result in a very embarrassing hospital trip for you, and potentially perforate your insides! Plus we will forever know you as "bottle guy" or "Lava Lamp girl"
I worked in the ER for many years. You always knew how triage was going to go when someone booked in looking sheepish with 'undisclosed personal issues' on a Saturday night
Me going to the ER because I got a very thin tampon stuck in myself after it absorbed too much blood and expanded beyond the width of my contracted pelvis(0.6" outlet). They had to take it out in pieces. Fun times.
@DGlaucomflecken - I know that sentence is supposed to sound very clinical/diplomatic, but it's really rather ooky when you think about it. Even put delicately, it's still indelicate. 🤢🤣
@@playfulpanthress what the hell are you talking about lol? The guy made a joke and it went right over the other guys head. Then you respond with that? You both must be on the spectrum or something. Maybe you can be friends since neither of you halfwits understand what jokes are.
I know that's right! Furthermore, like what you are just so clumsy, walking around naked and somehow you fell on a light bulb big side up and didn't break the glass?!? Did it really make you feel less embarrassed to say something so stupid? I mean if you like stuff up in there, embrace it. That doesn't bug me as much as being an idiot.
@@pookie717 [Speech 30/45] "Well you see doctor someone left a banana peel on the floor and before I know it there was a paper towel holder stuck up my ass."
@@pariahmouse7794for a lot of people, I think it's sensation play. Kinda like Icy Hot, cool but also burning, it's a weird fun sensation that you don't do very often. I'm mostly a sex repulsed ace, but what stuff I do actually do tends to be centered around exploring and enjoying sensations, a weighted blanket of sorts. There's also a bit of taboo for some people, I think. This isn't societally approved, so I'm a rebel for doing this cool thing. Childish and stupid in 2024, but hey. Some people also do it as a bit of peak bagging. Let me add another pokemon to my collection, or let me keep going bigger and bigger, and set the world record for Pac-Man high score. And then there's the concept of sexual attraction which I can't really comprehend, so I won't speak to it.
@hallsrelief2791 um, please elaborate? There are so many things wrong with me- what aspect of my existence irks you in particular? The fact that things up the butt don't particularly appeal to me? Seems odd, coming from a straight man such as yourself... I kind of thought such activities were verboten for your kind?
I love it because it's as if she's so into putting things up her butt that the advice bothers her. Not sure if that is really the case, but I'm having a great time thinking about her enjoying her hobby.
Some hospitals publish charity books with anecdotes about some of their dumbest patients (no names or identifying details etc), 'Items up the butt' is often a full chapter, alongside 'drunk stunts' and 'why did you eat/drink/lick that?'
I ate/drank/licked that because fifty bucks is fifty bucks, and I didn't expect them to have dosed it with bleach. Anyways, mind if I have a copy of that bill to go? I have some people in funny black suits and nice ties that need to see it.
@@leochapahell You’re right, I can't identify the joke of “or what”, seeing as there was no punchline, & the set-up exists in a sphere where people spout absolutely dogshit takes every 30 seconds. Can you please explain what is supposed to be so funny here?
I refuse to believe she asked that question without knowing the answer. She probably just wanted people to send her pictures of these horrific x-ray examples.
@@dklein2008 I always wonder if at least once in human history somebody has fallen over and something's gone up there legitimately. Like when they went to the emergency room and said "I slipped and it just went up there" and was not lying. I wonder if that's ever happened 😆
I read somewhere that the doctors would be able to tell. You'd have quite a lot of bruising, lacerations, and or cuts if you legitimately fell on something that way. There would also not be any lubricant (unless, I guess, they were preparing to insert it and accidentally fell on it [too] roughly instead?).
Seen a feller from the UK that slipped and fell in the shower on a old WW2 artillery shell. Somehow it was just sitting in his shower all lubed up and he fell in the squatting position perfectly over top of it.
I may be wrong but from the pelvis size, I think the candy cane was a kiddo... which would make sense from toddlers just chewing on and fiddling with everything. The others... like the candle WITH A REMOVABLE LID what did they think would happen... "it'll make my farts smell nice"? At least make sure if you're gonna try something that is against advice... that it doesn't have a second part that's removable... like even the Thermos if that still have the screw top on depending on what you're doing with it that's potentially gonna come off... *edited to add*... and the bottle too potentially had the lid on... and beer bottle lids with the flared edges would bloody hurt coming back out (like cat claws down the entire tunnel)
I’m a medical records clerk and the ER reports for these incidents are almost poetry. It gets particularly powerful when the patient has “prior medical history of foreign objects per rectum.” The gentle desperation of a clinician who must reflexively clench when they read the name on the chart.
Same. The funniest part to me was this one guy who ended up in the OR. His triage read something like "Lost adult toy in the rectum 2 days ago, toy contains battery but is powered off." It was the addition of it being turned off for me.
@@-Gax- Have a patient who presents the same time every year with “the complaint.” My two favorite quotes was a remark that this item per rectum was “at baseline” and a recommendation of “aggressive mental health treatment the month before expected incident to prevent reoccurrence”
I had a paramedic tell me about transporting a guy and his four foot florescent light bulb. 🙃 Patient couldn't understand why the paramedic wouldn't just yoink it, but it seems obvious to me.
We had a guest speaker come in our pre-med club and lead a presentation on ER trauma’s at our local hospital in the past year. He showed us an x-ray of a BUTTERNUT SQUASH in someone’s intestines- a large one. We had seen plenty of other traumatic pictures… gruesome motorcycle accidents, a hand torn off, dog attacks… the silence from the horror of seeing a squash that large in that part of the human anatomy was deafening. After about 15 sec someone asks very quietly ‘how did it get that far up?’ And the presenter said “you know… at some point suction takes over”. That image will live with me forever. The patient actually had to get over half of his intestines removed because they had lost blood flow for too long and the damage was irreparable.
Does that mean they had to be fitted with a colostomy bag?! I realize this is a stupid question, as it's likely self evident. I'm just hoping I'm wrong, and that the patient was able to avoid that form of permanent disability...! 😢
Every ER worker gets a thousand mile stare when you ask them what’s the weirdest things they’ve seen people put up their racetrack. My favorite was a precious moments doll - I feel like someone had a veeeery complicated relationship with a female relative.
@@TheBrindleBoxer well you see typically, as the female variety does not have a prostate, they have an alternative compared to the male variety, which is more efficient. in such events things also get stuck up there.
My cousin is a head ER nurse. He told me that they call that a SUIT. “Something up in there” so if you’re ever in an ER and hear them say “we’ve got a SUIT in 3.” You’ll know what that means. 🤣🤣🤣
Hello! Wound care LVN, here. Yes, make sure the base is flared, OR, you may end up with a colostomy to allow your RECTAL LACERATION to heal. And that may take 2 years or more. Then, you will need to go through the process of reversing the colostomy which may require a wound vac. Be careful.
@@ZebraLuv see, the thing about the internet is the people im talking to do not know me irl, they will not be able to judge me and affect my personal life with it. hospital staff very much know me irl, and they WILL judge, and it WILL affect my personal life. That's the difference. 😂 If a guy is on a nudist beach and sees someone he knows, he will cover his face, not his dick.
@@ZebraLuv Well that's the internet, it's anonymous and is nowhere as embarrassing as real life. There's no sitting in front of the doctor as they stare at you for answers, then having to explain what happened, and so on and so forth.
This was a first year of med school issue for us. A radiologist literally put up abdominal films and asked us “what’s this?” It sparked some interesting group discussions about human behavior and risk-taking.
Honestly...I think many people unfamiliar with such practices automatically assume, if it goes in, it will also come out on its own. They maybe don't immediately consider the exact shape of the object and that maybe being tense and in a panic can influence things. It would also never occur to someone not into this, that people might use really large objects for this. Like a beer bottle 🫣.
Probably stimulates the prostate better. Though I question if it was really a candy cane. I think in that case you can just put some water up there and wait a few hours instead of going to the hospital.
Or what? You'll have to explain to the ER why you've got random household object stuck there. And that's more embarrassing for you than it is for them.
@eloquentsloth6080 I've heard that story so many times. I counsel them to leave all cylindrical objects away from the shower. I don't know why there isn't a law mandating that everything less than a foot wide must have a retrieval loop so you can snag it.
@@rimjhimdhusiya699 most of these cases would probably happen from sexual curiosity or autoeroticism, particularly with biological males since massaging or stimulating the prostate is very pleasurable. Also masochistic desires to push through the pain which further enhances the pleasure. The anus has nerve endings and for some it feels good, putting things up there can also indirectly stimulate the vagina. Of course in cases where larger objects have been found, the patient probably experimented with smaller items first as the area actually doesn’t stretch super easily since you have a sphincter muscle holding everything in. Another reason is drug smuggling, or just smuggling in contraband, and ends up stuck. Or could be accidental like losing a rectal thermometer. Could also be from attention seeking behaviour mostly seen in psychiatric patients, also could be a form of self harm. Unfortunately, it could also occur from assaults.
This past christmas, my sister boyfriend, who's a surgeon, told us a story about a 82 year old who he has now had to remove an object from his rectum twice now. I've heard of some weird objects before, but this one took the cake. He lodged a RAW turkey leg up there. Yeah...my tthoughts exactly. Then to make matters even worse, when it got stuck, he tried to get it out himself using a wire coat hanger that he had cut and made a sharp hook out of. This ended up causing him to tear multiple holes in his colon and he still proceeded to wait 4 days to go to the ER. It was apparently one of the worst smells he has ever encountered. And stories like this are why I'm glad I never went into medicine!
i had considered being a nurse, and these kinds of stories discouraged me, lol. 82??? a raw turkey leg??? and a sharp wire coat hanger. uggggggh. surely there's got to be better ways to get some excitement in your life, yeesh
I once heard screaming coming from the upstairs apartment in my old building. Very loud "help help help help me me please and screaming and crying" I'm a former soldier and I had worked as a medic whilst in the army then on a close protection detail as a medic after completing in 9 month trauma medic course at a hospital in Johannesburg where there was endless stabbings and shootings and on a number of high altitude expeditions as a medic. I was Firefighter for a number of years until I was injured on the job and had to retire early. So I have a good working knowledge of how to stop bleeding. I went upstairs and a man has put a bottle up his bum and it had broke. It was impossible impossible to stop the bleeding. I had to get him to lay perfectly still (although by now he was unconscious through shock) and I just kept putting Celox in a syringe with no needle and just shot the powder again and again into the river of bum blood And packed hyper absorbant gauze around the glass that I could see. I used 14 sachets of Celox. I am making light of this because by an absolute miracle he survived. They transported him to hospital whilst continuing to transfuse him and I believe he had more blood than any other patient ever treated by St Mary's. He had caused catastrophic damage to his intestines, bladder, prostate gland and rectum. As you can imagine his quality of life is not good now. It left him totally unable to achieve orgasm, with a colostomy bag, a permanent catheter bag for urination, significant nerve damage which would cause autonomic disreflexia. I once treated somebody who had a 1-in laceration in their femoral artery caused by a piece of flying shrapnel during the aftermath of an IED attack in Iraq and the blood was coming out like f****** garden hose and I had that stopped, Packed and stabalisted and he was ready for transport within a very short time saving the man's life which required 1 sachet of celox and that incident was not even close to the Horrors of the river of bum blood. Please please please just go online and buy something that is meant to go up there. It's a lot more sanitary, it will be a lot more enjoyable and it will not kill you or leave you with lifelong disabilities. Seriously please
Oh my god... i dont know how to begin to feel for you when packing the bum blood river.. And now the man who lost a lot of things just to try to put GLASS up his arse.. jesus...
I just wrote a bunch of stuff but had to delete it all because it was just too graphic. There's just no way to describe what I was faced with that day. That hospital has been open for nearly 200 years and this man still to this day received the most blood ever. They basically had to cut him in half vertically to stitch everything back together internally. I saw some horrific things during the GWOT years but this is by far the one that makes me shudder at the very thought of it.
There's a weird video out there that I watched as a kid with friends of a guy shoving a mason jar up his rectum. Once the jar was fully consumed he clinched and broke the jar internally! The amount of blood pouring out still haunts me.
@@heatherduke7703 I have done a lot of work over the years on developing and improving techniques that stop the flow of blood from injuries caused by catastrophic trauma by using hemostatic clotting agents like celox and the dreaded kwikclot ( the latter used to cause chemical burns to the cornea so was fun to use in windy exterior conditions, it was discontinued!) a lot of injuries in War are caused by extremely hot pieces of metal so many wounds can be almost cauterized to a point. What made this injury extremely special was that something unimaginably Sharp had started cutting tissues from within the body which is why it was so challenging to treat. There was a lot of damage but the lower part of the bottle where it broke had started to move upwards towards the branch of the interior vena cava. I believe had it reached it then even with the auto transfusing that they eventually started there would be nothing that could be done as the blood just wouldn't stay in the body.. Although I'm not a surgeon I don't know what to do once someone is in the hospital. My abilities have always been keeping the personal life until they get to a surgeon. 🙂 I hope people read my original comment and maybe it stops somebody from doing this in the future. There are many places people can buy toys from for that kind of thing that come in discrete packaging and don't put anything on the credit card statement that might draw attention to them.
@@Darkwelltold my dad about that post a few years ago including the quote and he nearly fell over laughing. I’m glad people are still thinking about it
Best one i saw as a radiographer was a lightbulb lol, i still remember the poor new doctor asking if he could have a look on our screens, two seconds later he goes white and whispers in horror “how am i going to get that its glass” and after a minute to collect his wits ran for the consultant lol
Ìt's extra weird because a lightbulb *is* something with a flared base. For some ungodly reason, people go out of their way to insert THE FLARED BASE SIDE.
@@h3lblad3 been there, done that. The reason is that it's exciting and feels amazing. Being horny turns of your prefrontal cortex. You don't stop to think "mhh should I do this? Does it make sense mechanically?" you just sit on it, like the whore you are 😂
Probably dilate the sphincter, clamp it open then go in with rubber coated tongs. Like salad tongs but with pressure springs so you can't apply much force. Possibly go in and super glue a suction cup to the bulb, or part of it then attach that to a coated wire and slowly work it free. If it shatters while in the intestines, well have fun with the immediate need for a blood supply and emergency wash/drain of intestines, then subsequent fine stitching. People are incredible. You just NEED SOMETHING UP YOUR ASS and instead of going to your local supermarket for a vegetable 🥒 you grab a spare lightbulb 💡 and think "YES! This will do!".
Truly. Nobody says they CAN stop you; if you ask for the 'or what' you'll be told and if you don't listen then your body will stop you instead and it will not be as kindly. Knowledge gets more common and sense gets less so, but I'll never understand how.
Alright I know this looks bad but GET THIS so I tripped on something and my shorts fell down so as I was falling backwards I reached for something that could break my fall and then, and this'll sound farfetched, I grabbed the nearest thing I could find and my gerbil
Not far fetched at all - something very similar happened to a friend of mine. Except he didn't grab a gerbil but fell on a cucumber that happened to be upright for some reason. It's just so totally unfortunate when your belt and balance fail you at the same time.
Oh... They don't always fall on objects. I saw someone with an apple 🍎 stuck up his behind. He said he was up a ladder against a tree, picking apples and passing them down to his friend. His friend threw an apple back up to him and "it went inside".
As an intern, years ago, we had this middle-aged man come in with profuse rectal bleeding. The first doc to examine him cut his finger. Turns out he had "sat" on a 150W light bulb; it took a while to fish out all the glass shards and suture his rectal mucosa. Luckily, the glass had not perforated the organ. Have also seen a coke bottle and a candle.
All of them followed by, “see, see it” 🤣 Dude please never stop making videos - the most subtle facial expression from you & I’m already giggling - thanks for brightening so many of my days 💙
Human tenacity really knows no bounds. Like, it must’ve taken a lot of care and great patience to get that candy cane up there without breaking it 😂 Edit: Shouts out to RaditionRadish for pointing out that it’s probably a decorative candy cane! Still am confused as to how it got in there curved end first, tho.
I think it's a plastic or decoration candy cane. An actual one would show up pretty homogenous. The one on the xray is denser on the outside of it which may mean hard plastic with a hollow center
My friend is a radiologist and said he's pretty certain is shaving cream. Said it's a surprisingly common thing he sees up a butt, and says he usually sees one thing a week on average up a butt
I have so much respect for those in the medical field for being able to keep a straight face when talking to these patients. I applaud you and respect you for that because I’m too much of a child to refrain from giggles and butt jokes. You’re all saints.🎉
I used to work in a hospital as a coffee barista for staff and patients, and let me tell you. Hospital staff are NOT saints. At the end of the day, they're still people. That's why you gotta be picky about your care provider. Edit: People might read too much into my comment and assume I HATE all doctors and nurses. Which isn't the case. Just warning against assuming every doctor or nurse is well-intentioned. Some are just really arrogant and disrespectful, and I just don't get how anyone can respect them when they are so disrespectful to their patients themselves.
The rectal foreign body stories that always stuck in my memory were the concrete enema where they had to drill through the plug to equalize pressure, and the man who came in to the ER with what turned out to be a live mortar round up his butt.
ER Spelunking. We used to have x-rays competitions to see which shifts would win the Dahmer award. Truly an amazing collection of peoples creative Idiocy/depravity.
@@ellie8272it's only a Darwin award if they died or otherwise destroyed their reproductive abilities. Most things you stick up your butt aren't gonna do that
And probably how the first claim of "aliens probed my butt" started.....some guy not wanting to admit to his buddies why he couldn't sit down for a bit.
I'm a pathologist assistant and we get all kinds of crazy butt items in my lab (from the ER mostly). The worst one was a 2-foot-long heavy-duty flashlight that came with a segment of sigmoid colon that had perforated. Don't stick household items up your butt!
I know the "I fell" exuse is an old classic at this point but in my mind it would be Less embarrassing to go "we both know how it got there, can we move on to the next question?"
It's the glazed-over eyes for me. Like a solider who has witnessed countless horrors, and now finds comfort in violence.
this would sound really epic if u hadnt misspelled soldier
instead it just sounds tumblr-epic, which is close enough ig
1000 yard stare.
@@embelished_meister500 1000 arse stare
@@lechonkwoopersupremacy9029 they always said we got a third eye....
Fell on it
"Without a base, without a trace."
One of many slogans we had in the ER.
I once had a lady book in after a bullet vibrator got swallowed up. Took everything in me not to ask if it was still vibrating in there and if the battery was a duracel extra long life 😅
In the hole like a mole.
the fact that yall have slogans about putting stuff up butts lets me know where we are as a species. 😂
Well if it went up there without a trace you wouldn't need the ER, now would you?
@@patrickhaarhues2870 Take your tinfoil hat and shove it up your ass.
X-ray tech here. It will show up on the image, so... You may as well be honest from the get go
"How'd that get in there!?"
@@therabbithat repeat after me: I TRIPPED AND FEL ON IT. BACKWARDS. MULTIPLE SLIPS. 😮
X-ray tech-you must have some interesting stories! Bless you for the work you do!
Who is lying about that lol? Like the embaressing part is you put something in your butt. How is it less embaressing that its a candle instead of something else that doesnt belong up there?
And you're named Jonathan! Glad you're out there helping out all the docs 😉
I've told my nieces and students, "Don't put anything in your body you don't want to explain to a doctor how it got there." The students usually ask more questions and I say, "You think about what I said and come back to me next week with a question, not now." Usually one kid per class will come back with, "Miss did you mean our butts or our nose." The answer is always Yes.
I remember being told in elementary school the only thing you should stick up your nose is your elbow. Some class clowns then proceeded to attempt it for laughs.
Bahahaha
None of them consider that maybe you meant swallowing? They all go for butt or nose?
Seeing as I stuck a machine screw up my nose as a kid and then panicked when I couldn't get it back out right away this is God's work
@@maddietourmaline46Popcorn seed got me as a child, when I laughed because my sister laughed. Sucked it up in my nose way up in the back! Mama started freaking out, laughter had turned to crying, then… with all my might, all 50 pounds of myself gave out such a hard and fast blow to not only dislodge freakin popcorn seed from my right nare, it was so fast and forceful that the seed got hot and I thought my nostril was going to explode because the popcorn seed popped! Craziest things happen in real life.
🟡👃🔥☄️🍿😂
Butt stuff is like robbing a bank. Never go in without an extraction plan, or things get bad real fast
This has to be part of a safer sex PSA campaign! I want this on a sticker!
I want to see an Ocean's Eleven style briefing in preparation for the booty heist.
@@craterglass Say we get into the pants and through the underwear, and through the cheeks we can't open, and into the forbidden orifice. Say we do all that, we're just supposed walk out the back door without getting stopped?
It's just because you weren't tough enough on the staff. And because the cops have to turn up to ruin the day every time.
🤣🤣🤣
I work in a pathology lab. My favorite object we've received is a peanut butter jar with a broken shoelace tied around it. They had a plan, it just didn't work.
That's embarrassing 😂
🤣
😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂
Who in their right mind would want to have a OB jar up there ?! 😮
It always astounds me that people decide that the objects made specifically for this purpose aren’t enough and then go for *GLASS* bottles
I bet like over 99% of these cases are people who can't get appropriate sex toys for that, like a man that's married to a woman or a guy who lives in a religious household
I recently heard some guy put a light bulb up his ass... I don't think I have to say why this is a bad idea... Also it shattered when he tried to remove it... Glass splitters, literally everywhere...
Probably in a lot of cases it's that they're too embarrassed to just go out and get one of said objects. But that said, your next option was GLASS!??!
@@macaronsncheese9835 u can order these things on the Internet without the package saying what's inside, or even which shop it really came from😂 that's no excuse anymore. I mean the delivery person may know what kind of shop u ordered from, but they also sell things like condoms, so absolutely no reason to be ashamed 😅 (not that there is anyways)
And yeah, choosing something which could just shatter inside u is so weird😅
Either that or they have parents who are against buying one of said onjects and have no way to buy one without parents finding out, but agreed, out of all the goddamn options, why glass?!@@macaronsncheese9835
When he said "This is a candle, and it still.." I was POSITIVE he was going to say ".. and it's still lit"
It still has the cap on.... For NOW! 😂😂😂
Not enough oxygen.
😂😂😂 OMG! Me too!
As my favourite saying goes: "never do anything you cant admit to paramedics"
That's why the only explanation they receive is slipped an fell on it!
@@Cara-39I have no idea but isn’t there insurance stuff? If you say “I was bored and decided to put X in the butt” can’t insurance say that it is self inflicted damage and give you trouble with payment? If you say “I accidentally fell on X” it is an accident and insurance can’t proof it is not.
@@robbspace7731 I feel like there's a very strong argument that the need for medical intervention is unintentional, even if the original action of insertion is intentional.
Also, the policy would need to exclude self-inflicted injuries. To know what's covered or not covered in an insurance contract, you need to know the language of the specific contract, the policies of the company, and what's actually legal. They could deny the claim illegitimately, but then it's a legal and economic concern as to whether it's worth fighting over.
@@robbspace7731if you lie about the mechanism it could be cause for getting extra screening and care through insurance. Sitting on a bottle versus falling on one can have very different effects on your internal organs. More diagnostics would have to be done to ensure no rupture in your colon was observed.
Then you just get people who aren't ashamed to admit things.
Like that chick that was using a wooden bedpost because it was large and round.
Friend of mine was working in the ER. A patient was in the garden and slipped. Cucumber went straight up his butt. It was February.
the lengths men will go to just to not admit they like a little butt fun. I mean, I do get it, but I wish it was different.
This one got me laughing 😂😅
You know, like how we all walk through our garden naked with our cucumbers sticking straight up in the air and pre cut off the main plant. Very realistic scenario, especially in February lol.
This is why you don't garden naked while lubed up. It ends badly every time. Lucky it was a cucumber and not a rake or something.
Who’s gonna tell him?
Basically - your colon is LONG and likes to squeeze. Item goes in butt -> gets squeezed up into colon. You can't remove it or try to force it back out. At best, it needs to be manually removed by a doctor. Embarrassing and you'll be sore. At medium, it needs to be surgically removed by a doctor. At worst, it perforates your colon and you have infection in your abdominal cavity or even sepsis. Use a flared base please.
Whats a flared base ?
@@daizydoll6202base is wider than the rest of it
@@daizydoll6202 flares out, as in wider at the base than the shaft of the primary object that is going up in there.
@@treyshaffer lol thanks
But why can't you poo it out? Why does it get sucked up there
If you've ever done a suppository, you know there's a point where your butt just goes: "MINE"
Like a seagull 😂😂😂
“I just sat down and it was there….” said EVERY person I transported to the hospital with a random object stuck in their rectum.
9.9 times out of 10 it was an old man that was saying "in not some kind of *homophobic slur*
Like sir I actually feel bad about how self hating you are but it's obvious you're gay lol
There probably are a few people that actually have accidentally sat or fell on sonething in a freak incident and know damn well no one is going to believe them
🤣 people are hilarious. Just own it. It's embarassing yea, but at least it's a funny story, and ER staff have seen that type of shit (and way wilder shit) plenty of times. Trying to lie about it just makes it even more embarassing, cuz it's not like the staff are stupid enough to actually believe that lol. Like whoopsie just sat down and a whole thermos slipped up my ass 😭 C'mon now. Even if we wanna entertain that claim and say it's hypothetically true, that means you already have the loosest gaping anus and musta already been voluntarily shoving that up there on the regular LOL 🤣
Like, are people's butt cheeks so flat and wide open, while having a loose butthole to where something can be "oops accidentally sat on it" can happen?
Like, imo seems impossible to happen outside of this one sad video I seen where a guy fell? Jumped and landed on a pole, went halfway up him and he died, they couldn't find out how to remove him, etc.
Only extreme falls can that happen, and imo you'd be in immediate danger and pain if that happened, not embarrassing and slowly telling health staff about it, that is a sign of someone who did something they know they shouldn't have, like people who shove stuff up their noses. I would know, as a small child I shoved a bead up my nose.
@@krystami5789fr and not to mention you’d have to be naked for that to even happen 😭 no way just sitting down does that
Once asked a friend in the medical field how his day went. He sighed, shook his head, and muttered “If it can fit up a butt, it’s gonna go up a butt.”
You've heard of rule 34? I believe that is rule 33.
Well there was that one guy in France with WW1 artillery shell up his butt...
Corollary: Even if you don't think it can fit up a butt, someone, somehow, will make it fit.
@@Watery_Tart That can go for just about anything. "Even if you don't think someone's stupid enough to do it, someone somewhere sometime was probably stupid enough to do it."
@@Watery_Tartlike a traffic cone
I promise a toy designed to go up there is cheaper than the medical bill.
Any given toy off Squarepeg or Bad Dragon is still cheaper than my med insurance deductible. No excuses, people!
But then you have to wait for it to arrive - what I'd you want something up your butt NOW!
Where to find a $14,000 dildo
That's not the search bar
@@averywhitaker3513 amateur. I know it off the top of my head.
"or what?" ... famous last words of some unknown brave girl
Let me correct that, unknown idiot girl
Stupid girl, more likely.
I thought these stories were just exaggerations...until I worked on a trauma/surgery floor.
Well the 80s didn’t even convince people sooooo…
Convince people of what? @@audreyxatomic
Even if everybody has to find out only once, there are *so many* everybodys.
I can’t wait to work in those areas now 😭😭
I'm genuinely impressed that candy cane didn't snap.
Same
Fake... Those pictures are fake.
@@yellowdayz1800 yeah i believed it til the candycane
They make plastic candy canes… some are even large enough to be placed in the front yard on stakes. They even light up, believe it or not.
@@CSG0103 🙄
When my husband was an intern, he was called into the ER to consult on a rectal foreign object. He showed up and was like “why am I needed?” They said “you’re the surgical intern.” He was like “actually I’m the neurosurgical intern… but I still want to keep this case because I HAVE to know the outcome” 😂
Neurosurgery should only have been called for a rectal FB if someone had their head up their ass
"This person's a repeat offender. We're gonna need you to remove his thalmus so he can stop"
@@stansman5461
LMAO
Who’s the bigger fool, the fool who shoves something up his butt, or the fool who doesn’t know the difference between a butt and a brain?
Yeah it went so deep they needed neurosurgery
Worst I saw was a bulb inserted...it broke.
YOUCH
Swear I was just thinking about that. I don't remember where I saw it!! But it was horrendous..
Hospital security here, if you put stuff in yourself that isn't made to go up there, it will result in a very embarrassing hospital trip for you, and potentially perforate your insides! Plus we will forever know you as "bottle guy" or "Lava Lamp girl"
I hope to god that lava lamp wasn't on
Lava lamp!? 😂😂😂
@jeremyhearne where's the fun in a non working lava lamp?
There's silicone toys shaped like lava lamps now. Just buy those. Far less risk
Oh gosh was there really someone who took a lava lamp and…”fell on it” ???
I worked in the ER for many years. You always knew how triage was going to go when someone booked in looking sheepish with 'undisclosed personal issues' on a Saturday night
And 99% of them "fell on it".
Frank: (to the proctologist) A million-to-one shot, Doc, million-to-one.
Me going to the ER because I got a very thin tampon stuck in myself after it absorbed too much blood and expanded beyond the width of my contracted pelvis(0.6" outlet). They had to take it out in pieces. Fun times.
@@LycanFerretaaaaannnd that's reason 5,091 I use pads😭 Hell no to any of that
🎵 Saturday night and I got no plans, gonna stick a candle up my azz 🎵
Perfect response to the question.
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
Tbf the original person had to have been joking but. People really do think that way
🎶It’s you and me. That’s my whole world. Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince.🎶
@@McKinleeBean-ol2ksOMG I WAS THINKING THAT😭😭😭😭
"Or what?"
lady that's just common sense
So overused
OMG, that delivery! Utterly FLAWLESS! Chefs kiss, Doc! 🧂💋
I'll be honest, I'm just surprised they got those things to fit up there
The rectum is very accommodating
@@DGlaucomflecken Rectum? Damn near killed 'em!
@@boogeyratt 😂 that is the best use of that joke that I have ever seen. You now own that joke as far as I am concerned
@DGlaucomflecken - I know that sentence is supposed to sound very clinical/diplomatic, but it's really rather ooky when you think about it. Even put delicately, it's still indelicate. 🤢🤣
Practice.
Love from the RadTech crew, Doc.
Never do anything you wouldn’t want to explain to the EMTs.
Words to live by
Exactly
I don’t think some ppl would care lol. Some have no shame 😂
if ever there were a 2nd Golden Rule!😂
As an EMT.. 🙌🏼🙌🏼👏🏼👏🏼😂😂
There is a game doctors used to play at my hospital called “guess the foreign object” we played once every Friday
😂
EVERY friday?
@@emilysha418 yup and according to the nursing student I know you can get triples on fridays during pride month
@@avroarchitect1793 YOOOOOOOOOOO
@@avroarchitect1793 rip
"This.. uh.. is a candy cane.." the horror in his eyes and voice 😂😂
Looks like the beer bottle would've been flared enough but someone got greedy 💀
LMAO
😂😂😂
Bruhhh 😭😭😭
😂😂😂😂💀💀💀💀💀💀
😂😂😂
I need a thermos with a flared base so I can sneak soup into the theater
I. On it , sir. To who who whom do I send the bill? Plz?
Soup? Really? Most people would smuggle alcohol containing beverages.
@@robzee5733Do you not know what a joke is?
@@Dead1yCoolJoking doesn't change reality, buddy.
@@playfulpanthress what the hell are you talking about lol? The guy made a joke and it went right over the other guys head. Then you respond with that? You both must be on the spectrum or something. Maybe you can be friends since neither of you halfwits understand what jokes are.
7 barbie doll heads was the worst one I ever heard of from a friend who was an x-ray tech😂
SORRY WHAT
What the......😂
There was a Grey's Anatomy episode where a guy had a bowel obstruction from swallowing 10 Judy doll heads. That's what this made me think of.
Anal bead style?
the fact that there was seven either implies that somehow they were all at the same time, or they just kept going even after the first six got stuck
I have a friend who used to be a paramedic, according to him it's surprisingly common for people to "slip and fall on" all kinds of crap
"I fell on it"
"Yeah we get that a lot" 😂😂😂
Lol 😆 🤣 😂... I almost die laughing. Thank you, what great comment.
I know that's right! Furthermore, like what you are just so clumsy, walking around naked and somehow you fell on a light bulb big side up and didn't break the glass?!? Did it really make you feel less embarrassed to say something so stupid? I mean if you like stuff up in there, embrace it. That doesn't bug me as much as being an idiot.
😂yes I came across a ‘I was just hoovering naked , slipt and unfortunately landed on the shampoo bottle’
@@pookie717 [Speech 30/45] "Well you see doctor someone left a banana peel on the floor and before I know it there was a paper towel holder stuck up my ass."
@@Achiles5th and a pair of vice grips. I must just have bad luck.
Every surgery dept has a wall covered with these X-rays. Such a common behavior among earthlings.
@@pariahmouse7794for a lot of people, I think it's sensation play. Kinda like Icy Hot, cool but also burning, it's a weird fun sensation that you don't do very often. I'm mostly a sex repulsed ace, but what stuff I do actually do tends to be centered around exploring and enjoying sensations, a weighted blanket of sorts.
There's also a bit of taboo for some people, I think. This isn't societally approved, so I'm a rebel for doing this cool thing. Childish and stupid in 2024, but hey.
Some people also do it as a bit of peak bagging. Let me add another pokemon to my collection, or let me keep going bigger and bigger, and set the world record for Pac-Man high score.
And then there's the concept of sexual attraction which I can't really comprehend, so I won't speak to it.
@hallsrelief2791 um, please elaborate?
There are so many things wrong with me- what aspect of my existence irks you in particular?
The fact that things up the butt don't particularly appeal to me?
Seems odd, coming from a straight man such as yourself...
I kind of thought such activities were verboten for your kind?
I think you mean “degenerates”
Aye bro, are you an alien?
And they all have the same excuse: "I sat on it" 😂
Quite a wild piece of advice to rebel against. Like girl.....do you, but don't come begging for help after you find out the "or what"
I love it because it's as if she's so into putting things up her butt that the advice bothers her. Not sure if that is really the case, but I'm having a great time thinking about her enjoying her hobby.
@@thisismyyoutubename1214Nobosy needed to know this
The funniest this it not only girl that like to shove thing back there. Maybe less straight man but I hear story. And both party are down bad.
@@piesayshello5509orangutan tidy
She has to be joking right?
Some hospitals publish charity books with anecdotes about some of their dumbest patients (no names or identifying details etc), 'Items up the butt' is often a full chapter, alongside 'drunk stunts' and 'why did you eat/drink/lick that?'
I ate/drank/licked that because fifty bucks is fifty bucks, and I didn't expect them to have dosed it with bleach. Anyways, mind if I have a copy of that bill to go? I have some people in funny black suits and nice ties that need to see it.
That third one I’m like 90% sure is some sort of aerosol canister which is even more terrifying when you look up how those are designed
I thought so too
And human body is 37° Celsius 😭
Looks like a can of spray paint like Rust-Oleum. 😮
@@sandracheboThink this is a Montana gold XD (JK, you can't really tell from an X ray)
“or what” DO THEY THINK THERE’S SOME GATEKEEPING CONSPIRACY?? HONEY, THE EVENING WILL END IN AN ER TRIP
everyone knows that we have portals up there to the gods.
@@spongmongler6760The government hid microphones up there, the flared base is designed to keep it from touching the secret GPS tracker
Honestly exactly what someone who was gatekeeping would say
I hope you can identify a joke someday 😂
@@leochapahell You’re right, I can't identify the joke of “or what”, seeing as there was no punchline, & the set-up exists in a sphere where people spout absolutely dogshit takes every 30 seconds. Can you please explain what is supposed to be so funny here?
I refuse to believe she asked that question without knowing the answer. She probably just wanted people to send her pictures of these horrific x-ray examples.
She just doesn't want to feel like her options are being limited
>woman
honestly, it's not intuitive to understand why they won't eventually just come back out
There's flat earthers and climate change deniers, it isn't outside the pale for her to be that ignorant.
I think you spelled hilarious wrong XD
I like how the doctor calmly and quietly shows us these objects
Ah, the old slip n fall, always lodges the craziest objects, but never causes any trauma
@@dklein2008 I always wonder if at least once in human history somebody has fallen over and something's gone up there legitimately. Like when they went to the emergency room and said "I slipped and it just went up there" and was not lying. I wonder if that's ever happened 😆
I read somewhere that the doctors would be able to tell. You'd have quite a lot of bruising, lacerations, and or cuts if you legitimately fell on something that way. There would also not be any lubricant (unless, I guess, they were preparing to insert it and accidentally fell on it [too] roughly instead?).
Seen a feller from the UK that slipped and fell in the shower on a old WW2 artillery shell. Somehow it was just sitting in his shower all lubed up and he fell in the squatting position perfectly over top of it.
I may be wrong but from the pelvis size, I think the candy cane was a kiddo... which would make sense from toddlers just chewing on and fiddling with everything.
The others... like the candle WITH A REMOVABLE LID what did they think would happen... "it'll make my farts smell nice"? At least make sure if you're gonna try something that is against advice... that it doesn't have a second part that's removable... like even the Thermos if that still have the screw top on depending on what you're doing with it that's potentially gonna come off... *edited to add*... and the bottle too potentially had the lid on... and beer bottle lids with the flared edges would bloody hurt coming back out (like cat claws down the entire tunnel)
@@BeckiMuttleyreading your horrorfest of a comment thread earlier makes this reply hit in a much different way LOL
I’m a medical records clerk and the ER reports for these incidents are almost poetry. It gets particularly powerful when the patient has “prior medical history of foreign objects per rectum.” The gentle desperation of a clinician who must reflexively clench when they read the name on the chart.
If only the patient had reflexively clenched, nobody would be in this situation.
@@rrl9786💀
"Paul's back. Third time in as many months. Somebody go buy him something WITH A BASE. We'll call it his prescription"
Same. The funniest part to me was this one guy who ended up in the OR. His triage read something like "Lost adult toy in the rectum 2 days ago, toy contains battery but is powered off." It was the addition of it being turned off for me.
@@-Gax- Have a patient who presents the same time every year with “the complaint.” My two favorite quotes was a remark that this item per rectum was “at baseline” and a recommendation of “aggressive mental health treatment the month before expected incident to prevent reoccurrence”
"There's no lost-and-found box in surgery. There's an ass-box."
No ladybits* box?
* 🐈/🍑/🦪/🦫
She says that while chewing the pen!
@@Toimu13 Which, hopefully, was not taken from the ass-box.
You've never seen scrubs, have you?@@SiiriCressey
Pretty sure the lost-and-found box is just a patient's chest cavity.
Moral is ,getting something stuck there can be a real pain in the ass
I worked with General Surgery for 5 years at my last job. The intact lightbulb was the most impressive one, because we managed to keep it intact.
Wow…good job
How did you remove it?
Incandescent or LED?
I had a paramedic tell me about transporting a guy and his four foot florescent light bulb. 🙃 Patient couldn't understand why the paramedic wouldn't just yoink it, but it seems obvious to me.
@@traveller23e Easy, you shove a lamp up there, give it a few turns, and pull. Gently.
We had a guest speaker come in our pre-med club and lead a presentation on ER trauma’s at our local hospital in the past year. He showed us an x-ray of a BUTTERNUT SQUASH in someone’s intestines- a large one. We had seen plenty of other traumatic pictures… gruesome motorcycle accidents, a hand torn off, dog attacks… the silence from the horror of seeing a squash that large in that part of the human anatomy was deafening. After about 15 sec someone asks very quietly ‘how did it get that far up?’ And the presenter said “you know… at some point suction takes over”. That image will live with me forever. The patient actually had to get over half of his intestines removed because they had lost blood flow for too long and the damage was irreparable.
This will haunt me for years to come. Unreal. 😭😭😭😭
well.
This is horrifying.
God its so messed up, yer I guess it's like a vacuum 😢good lord!
Does that mean they had to be fitted with a colostomy bag?! I realize this is a stupid question, as it's likely self evident. I'm just hoping I'm wrong, and that the patient was able to avoid that form of permanent disability...! 😢
Every ER worker gets a thousand mile stare when you ask them what’s the weirdest things they’ve seen people put up their racetrack. My favorite was a precious moments doll - I feel like someone had a veeeery complicated relationship with a female relative.
@@TheBrindleBoxer You really need to ask? Of course it's men.
oh my
Are you serious? LMAO @@TheBrindleBoxer
"Racetrack" 😆
@@TheBrindleBoxer well you see typically, as the female variety does not have a prostate, they have an alternative compared to the male variety, which is more efficient. in such events things also get stuck up there.
The fact that the candle is spent is the wildest part to me. So many questions. 😂
My cousin is a head ER nurse. He told me that they call that a SUIT. “Something up in there” so if you’re ever in an ER and hear them say “we’ve got a SUIT in 3.” You’ll know what that means. 🤣🤣🤣
Does it really happen that much?
@yellowdayz1800 far more commonly than you would guess.
@@P4brotagonist oh my goodness... Lol. Wow. Lol
🤣
Hello! Wound care LVN, here. Yes, make sure the base is flared, OR, you may end up with a colostomy to allow your RECTAL LACERATION to heal. And that may take 2 years or more. Then, you will need to go through the process of reversing the colostomy which may require a wound vac. Be careful.
This is terrifying.
omg the insurance bills....💀
jesus christ that sounds awful! i'd much rather just buy a well-designed toy. shame is wild 😂
Yeah… I’m just gonna not stick stuff up my butt. 😂
Yikes why do people want things in there?! I don't even like pooing
💀@@izzydeadyet7336
"Never do anything you don't want to explain to ER personnel" words to live by
You sure? We've all seen the internet's ability to overshare. Embarrassment and self respect seem to be long extinct.
@@ZebraLuv see, the thing about the internet is the people im talking to do not know me irl, they will not be able to judge me and affect my personal life with it. hospital staff very much know me irl, and they WILL judge, and it WILL affect my personal life. That's the difference. 😂
If a guy is on a nudist beach and sees someone he knows, he will cover his face, not his dick.
@@ZebraLuv Well that's the internet, it's anonymous and is nowhere as embarrassing as real life. There's no sitting in front of the doctor as they stare at you for answers, then having to explain what happened, and so on and so forth.
That’s boring life.
There’s a bunch of stuff that can go wrong even IF you do it right…
As a former Radiologic Technologist I’ve seen many FBOs in many bodily orifices. I did not want to know why and how🙄
This was a first year of med school issue for us. A radiologist literally put up abdominal films and asked us “what’s this?” It sparked some interesting group discussions about human behavior and risk-taking.
I've personally x-rayed one with a beer bottle! It's amazing to see in person. "Please don't tell my wife" 😂
If only she knew though, she could get him a special Christmas present with a flared base
😂 poor guy
@@traveller23e this is an underrated comment. So thoughtful!
@@traveller23enot all woman are chill like that.
I learned this from house md. “His colon had an idea 💡 “
I think that was Scrubs, where the Janitor figures out how to get it out without surgery. Quote is correct, I think Dr Cox said it though
Was the LIGHT BULB intentional?😂😂😂
Me, from E.R.
Say you have a fetish without saying you have a fetish.
I love that she says "or what?" So confidently lol. Girllll why don't you try it and find out 😂
It’s probably a joke. He just stitched it so it skips the context
@@DeathnoteBB yea I figured but it's fun to play along with the joke
@@DeathnoteBBWith that smug energy😂
Nah
@@FineWine-v4.0it literally is a joke
Honestly...I think many people unfamiliar with such practices automatically assume, if it goes in, it will also come out on its own. They maybe don't immediately consider the exact shape of the object and that maybe being tense and in a panic can influence things. It would also never occur to someone not into this, that people might use really large objects for this. Like a beer bottle 🫣.
The candy cane has the HOOK SIDE UP THERE
fish going for the worm mentality.
It's fake.
its just edited onto a legit x ray . Nobody waste good candy shaped like that .
I thought it was one of those plastic lawn ornament candy canes?
Probably stimulates the prostate better. Though I question if it was really a candy cane. I think in that case you can just put some water up there and wait a few hours instead of going to the hospital.
Or what? You'll have to explain to the ER why you've got random household object stuck there. And that's more embarrassing for you than it is for them.
Clearly she fell on it after getting out of the shower
@eloquentsloth6080 I've heard that story so many times. I counsel them to leave all cylindrical objects away from the shower.
I don't know why there isn't a law mandating that everything less than a foot wide must have a retrieval loop so you can snag it.
But like doesn't it hurt ? Why do ppl do it if it hurts?
@@rimjhimdhusiya699 most of these cases would probably happen from sexual curiosity or autoeroticism, particularly with biological males since massaging or stimulating the prostate is very pleasurable. Also masochistic desires to push through the pain which further enhances the pleasure. The anus has nerve endings and for some it feels good, putting things up there can also indirectly stimulate the vagina. Of course in cases where larger objects have been found, the patient probably experimented with smaller items first as the area actually doesn’t stretch super easily since you have a sphincter muscle holding everything in.
Another reason is drug smuggling, or just smuggling in contraband, and ends up stuck.
Or could be accidental like losing a rectal thermometer. Could also be from attention seeking behaviour mostly seen in psychiatric patients, also could be a form of self harm. Unfortunately, it could also occur from assaults.
@hemera16 omg thank you for giving me an actual answer . That's really nice to know
I can’t unwrap a candy cane without breaking it, yet they got it up there with no breaks? Rectum? Damn near killed em!
All these poor people who fell on these random household objects...
This past christmas, my sister boyfriend, who's a surgeon, told us a story about a 82 year old who he has now had to remove an object from his rectum twice now. I've heard of some weird objects before, but this one took the cake.
He lodged a RAW turkey leg up there. Yeah...my tthoughts exactly.
Then to make matters even worse, when it got stuck, he tried to get it out himself using a wire coat hanger that he had cut and made a sharp hook out of. This ended up causing him to tear multiple holes in his colon and he still proceeded to wait 4 days to go to the ER.
It was apparently one of the worst smells he has ever encountered.
And stories like this are why I'm glad I never went into medicine!
Holy shhhh...I would have thought that sheer embarrassment alone would have prevented the second instance. Clearly I would have been wrong.
...
Ph my god how did this man live wtf
Everyone knows you only put COOKED POULTRY in your prison wallet! We need Greta Thunburg to do a PSA or Afterschool Special on it
i had considered being a nurse, and these kinds of stories discouraged me, lol. 82??? a raw turkey leg??? and a sharp wire coat hanger. uggggggh. surely there's got to be better ways to get some excitement in your life, yeesh
I once heard screaming coming from the upstairs apartment in my old building. Very loud "help help help help me me please and screaming and crying"
I'm a former soldier and I had worked as a medic whilst in the army then on a close protection detail as a medic after completing in 9 month trauma medic course at a hospital in Johannesburg where there was endless stabbings and shootings and on a number of high altitude expeditions as a medic. I was Firefighter for a number of years until I was injured on the job and had to retire early. So I have a good working knowledge of how to stop bleeding.
I went upstairs and a man has put a bottle up his bum and it had broke. It was impossible impossible to stop the bleeding. I had to get him to lay perfectly still (although by now he was unconscious through shock) and I just kept putting Celox in a syringe with no needle and just shot the powder again and again into the river of bum blood And packed hyper absorbant gauze around the glass that I could see. I used 14 sachets of Celox.
I am making light of this because by an absolute miracle he survived. They transported him to hospital whilst continuing to transfuse him and I believe he had more blood than any other patient ever treated by St Mary's. He had caused catastrophic damage to his intestines, bladder, prostate gland and rectum. As you can imagine his quality of life is not good now. It left him totally unable to achieve orgasm, with a colostomy bag, a permanent catheter bag for urination, significant nerve damage which would cause autonomic disreflexia.
I once treated somebody who had a 1-in laceration in their femoral artery caused by a piece of flying shrapnel during the aftermath of an IED attack in Iraq and the blood was coming out like f****** garden hose and I had that stopped, Packed and stabalisted and he was ready for transport within a very short time saving the man's life which required 1 sachet of celox and that incident was not even close to the Horrors of the river of bum blood.
Please please please just go online and buy something that is meant to go up there. It's a lot more sanitary, it will be a lot more enjoyable and it will not kill you or leave you with lifelong disabilities. Seriously please
Oh my god... i dont know how to begin to feel for you when packing the bum blood river..
And now the man who lost a lot of things just to try to put GLASS up his arse.. jesus...
I just wrote a bunch of stuff but had to delete it all because it was just too graphic. There's just no way to describe what I was faced with that day. That hospital has been open for nearly 200 years and this man still to this day received the most blood ever. They basically had to cut him in half vertically to stitch everything back together internally.
I saw some horrific things during the GWOT years but this is by far the one that makes me shudder at the very thought of it.
There's a weird video out there that I watched as a kid with friends of a guy shoving a mason jar up his rectum. Once the jar was fully consumed he clinched and broke the jar internally! The amount of blood pouring out still haunts me.
Holy cow, you saved that man’s life. What are the odds of him having a neighbor who was a military medic. Craziness
@@heatherduke7703 I have done a lot of work over the years on developing and improving techniques that stop the flow of blood from injuries caused by catastrophic trauma by using hemostatic clotting agents like celox and the dreaded kwikclot ( the latter used to cause chemical burns to the cornea so was fun to use in windy exterior conditions, it was discontinued!) a lot of injuries in War are caused by extremely hot pieces of metal so many wounds can be almost cauterized to a point. What made this injury extremely special was that something unimaginably Sharp had started cutting tissues from within the body which is why it was so challenging to treat. There was a lot of damage but the lower part of the bottle where it broke had started to move upwards towards the branch of the interior vena cava.
I believe had it reached it then even with the auto transfusing that they eventually started there would be nothing that could be done as the blood just wouldn't stay in the body..
Although I'm not a surgeon I don't know what to do once someone is in the hospital. My abilities have always been keeping the personal life until they get to a surgeon. 🙂
I hope people read my original comment and maybe it stops somebody from doing this in the future. There are many places people can buy toys from for that kind of thing that come in discrete packaging and don't put anything on the credit card statement that might draw attention to them.
Excellent points made.
Going to go with flared base objects for rectal exploration.
One of my favorites is the Buzz Lightyear toy. With the tiny wings extended in the back.
To infinity, and beyond! 😂
And the mandatory quote, "You've got a friend in you."
More like "To infinity and behind!"
@@NiallBoggins 😂
@@Darkwelltold my dad about that post a few years ago including the quote and he nearly fell over laughing. I’m glad people are still thinking about it
Buzz was never the same after that.
Best one i saw as a radiographer was a lightbulb lol, i still remember the poor new doctor asking if he could have a look on our screens, two seconds later he goes white and whispers in horror “how am i going to get that its glass” and after a minute to collect his wits ran for the consultant lol
And very thin glass! Yikes!
Scrubs did that one
Ìt's extra weird because a lightbulb *is* something with a flared base.
For some ungodly reason, people go out of their way to insert THE FLARED BASE SIDE.
@@h3lblad3 been there, done that.
The reason is that it's exciting and feels amazing. Being horny turns of your prefrontal cortex. You don't stop to think "mhh should I do this? Does it make sense mechanically?" you just sit on it, like the whore you are 😂
Probably dilate the sphincter, clamp it open then go in with rubber coated tongs. Like salad tongs but with pressure springs so you can't apply much force.
Possibly go in and super glue a suction cup to the bulb, or part of it then attach that to a coated wire and slowly work it free.
If it shatters while in the intestines, well have fun with the immediate need for a blood supply and emergency wash/drain of intestines, then subsequent fine stitching.
People are incredible. You just NEED SOMETHING UP YOUR ASS and instead of going to your local supermarket for a vegetable 🥒 you grab a spare lightbulb 💡 and think "YES! This will do!".
The "You can't stop me" attitude is what really gets me. Like, seriously, listen to the advice of those who know what they're talking about.
party pooper🙄i would say to her that she shouldn't do it only once and then watch😸🍿after all it's rude to interrupt a clown mid performance🤡
Ikr! I just thought "well do it and see what happens" 🙄 ignorance and arrogance are both good friends of natural selection
Truly. Nobody says they CAN stop you; if you ask for the 'or what' you'll be told and if you don't listen then your body will stop you instead and it will not be as kindly. Knowledge gets more common and sense gets less so, but I'll never understand how.
Let her find out how far stupidity and belligerence will take her...right into an operating room.
The candy cane sent me flying😂😂
Lol. There's a shopping icon and the first two items that come up are the Jonathan candle and the Nephorology thermos. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Please tell me the thermos looks like a container of salt I can grip menacingly.
@@jimwormmastergo look, its fantastic! Most expensive thing on the site, but that cant be helped
Dr G, sir, are these YOUR X-rays hahah
the ''thermos'' looks like a spray-paint can, it has the valve in the middle and the sloped design on top
Hairspray or body spray of some kind be my guess.
@@t-bfr45-70No. It’s a 400ml spray can. Most likely paint, brake degreaser, or clearcoat.
@@Fathom324 I was thinking more like the old aqua net you could be on to something.
WHY?! Just no!
Haha! Agreed. I thought aerosol can as soon as I saw the 'thermos'.
Alright I know this looks bad but GET THIS so I tripped on something and my shorts fell down so as I was falling backwards I reached for something that could break my fall and then, and this'll sound farfetched, I grabbed the nearest thing I could find and my gerbil
Million to one shot, doc. Million to one.
Not far fetched at all - something very similar happened to a friend of mine. Except he didn't grab a gerbil but fell on a cucumber that happened to be upright for some reason. It's just so totally unfortunate when your belt and balance fail you at the same time.
@@DGlaucomflecken Million to one chance happens every time, everyone knows that
I remember reading about a guy who claimed this excuse for a *WW2 shell* up his butt when he went to A&E 😆
Oh... They don't always fall on objects. I saw someone with an apple 🍎 stuck up his behind. He said he was up a ladder against a tree, picking apples and passing them down to his friend. His friend threw an apple back up to him and "it went inside".
I always wonder how long people ....um ???sit tight??? 😂😂 until they go for professional help
As an intern, years ago, we had this middle-aged man come in with profuse rectal bleeding. The first doc to examine him cut his finger. Turns out he had "sat" on a 150W light bulb; it took a while to fish out all the glass shards and suture his rectal mucosa. Luckily, the glass had not perforated the organ. Have also seen a coke bottle and a candle.
That is horrifying… lightbulbs are so fragile! I get a teeny bit anxious just changing out dead ones. Glad to hear rhe damage wasn’t worse.
Wow
moral of the story: don't put glass up your ass
He should have had more thought for the staff and warned them first. A cut infected with the contents of a rectum is an awful hazard.😮
My granddad was a psychiatric nurse, one patient managed to get 13 table tennis balls up there.
Impressive.
That takes balls
13 of them
Im making a new world record attempt
@@youdontknowwhoiam2449 😂
Good luck?
I know this is still pretty wild, but imagine my relief when I re-read this and finally saw the word "table" in the sentence.
Retired ER doc here. Been there done that. Thanks for the trip down memory lane.
I hope the trip didn't involve falling onto an object with a non-flared base.
@@suzyactiondoll only if he also fell after he tripped.
All of them followed by, “see, see it” 🤣
Dude please never stop making videos - the most subtle facial expression from you & I’m already giggling - thanks for brightening so many of my days 💙
"Or what?" That's the kind of talk that gets one's xrays into such a video XD
She thinks she is the brave and smart one, doesn't she?
Yes in the " old days" radiologists had walls of unusual xrays in their office...no identifying info.
I miss those days
I refuse to believe radiologists don't have file folders on their computers of their favorite images.
Human tenacity really knows no bounds. Like, it must’ve taken a lot of care and great patience to get that candy cane up there without breaking it 😂
Edit: Shouts out to RaditionRadish for pointing out that it’s probably a decorative candy cane! Still am confused as to how it got in there curved end first, tho.
😂right!?
I think it's a plastic or decoration candy cane. An actual one would show up pretty homogenous. The one on the xray is denser on the outside of it which may mean hard plastic with a hollow center
If they had just gone in the other way, everything would have been fine.
I didn’t even think about “without breaking it”
Man, we ain’t mentioning the fucking thermos?
All ER Docs and nurses have their horror stories 😂😂
Never put anything up your butt that you don't want displayed up on an X-ray in the middle of the ER.
To every single colleague that walks into the nurse's station!
So, then.... everything I do want displayed? I'm going to have to think about that for a while. Nope, not coming up with anything.
@@meganrhode88 THE STATUE OF LIBERTY 🦅🦅🦅🔥🔥‼️‼️‼️
"So what's the biggest you've had in bed?"
"A thermos"
"What?"
Looks like a paint can tbh
@@Morpheas001
I thought that too. Looks like you're changing nozzles.
My friend is a radiologist and said he's pretty certain is shaving cream. Said it's a surprisingly common thing he sees up a butt, and says he usually sees one thing a week on average up a butt
Really makes the idea of someone talking about their fb Stanley a bit more interesting 😂
WHY IS NOBODY TALKING ABOUT THE CANDY CANE??? 😭😭 HELP
I have so much respect for those in the medical field for being able to keep a straight face when talking to these patients. I applaud you and respect you for that because I’m too much of a child to refrain from giggles and butt jokes. You’re all saints.🎉
I used to work in a hospital as a coffee barista for staff and patients, and let me tell you. Hospital staff are NOT saints.
At the end of the day, they're still people. That's why you gotta be picky about your care provider.
Edit: People might read too much into my comment and assume I HATE all doctors and nurses. Which isn't the case. Just warning against assuming every doctor or nurse is well-intentioned. Some are just really arrogant and disrespectful, and I just don't get how anyone can respect them when they are so disrespectful to their patients themselves.
The constant, "See it?" is taking me out!!!!!!
🤦🏻♀️ people, there are toys specifically for what you want. Don’t be that person in the ER with the excuse that you fell on it, okay?
The rectal foreign body stories that always stuck in my memory were the concrete enema where they had to drill through the plug to equalize pressure, and the man who came in to the ER with what turned out to be a live mortar round up his butt.
A live morter round???
You shouldn't let concrete touch your skin, it will eat right through it
Why would you let it enter your rektum?
@@punkinpiez poor doctors.
Ha ha, my ears aren't so good anymore, for a second there I thought you said CONCRETE ENEMA, ha ha, can you even imagine..... wait what? 😳
@@DaddyBeanDaddyBean
pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/3649167/
50 years ago I was a medical transcriber. ER chief resident dictated about a cucumber he removed, “Baby delivered. Mother and baby doing well. “😂
I SERIOUSLY doubt the baby was “doing well,” but still. Worth the joke. 100%😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂
"Baby alive and well, yet smelling a little weird"
My dad saw an X-ray of a bottle of Tabasco once
ER Spelunking. We used to have x-rays competitions to see which shifts would win the Dahmer award. Truly an amazing collection of peoples creative Idiocy/depravity.
You mean the Darwin award?
@@ellie8272 I would think so? Dahmer's famous for having his guests for dinner, not for insertion of things.
@@ellie8272it's only a Darwin award if they died or otherwise destroyed their reproductive abilities. Most things you stick up your butt aren't gonna do that
😱😱😱 my eyes want to un-see😱😱😱
@@grmpEqweer that's Hannibal... but he WAS cannibal
This is why aliens don’t stop by for a visit.
It's why they think the anal probe is a friendly handshake for our species.
And probably how the first claim of "aliens probed my butt" started.....some guy not wanting to admit to his buddies why he couldn't sit down for a bit.
Not true. Aliens are rectal probe enthusiasts
Except for the kind into anal probing... Which makes sense now that I think about it.
probably doesn't help that we blame them for probing us in the ass so much.
"why are humans so obsessed with having things shoved up their assholes?!"
As a radiation technician, I've seen way too many weird stuffs in buttholes 😢
Can we get a top 10?
@@user-vb6ky1mo9eglassbulb
I REALLY love how you show each image like a kid going through show and tell with a curious yet somewhat monotone voice like. "see it?"
I'm a pathologist assistant and we get all kinds of crazy butt items in my lab (from the ER mostly). The worst one was a 2-foot-long heavy-duty flashlight that came with a segment of sigmoid colon that had perforated. Don't stick household items up your butt!
2 FEET LONG??? I’m impressed the person made it out alive!
This is something that should be shown in every high school health class. Along with a mention of all the procedures and surgeries that happen.
Also make sure it has a strong base. I have read case studies where the problem was that the flared base broke off during the extraction attempt.
The lid on the candle the whole ass thermos and then the candy cane lmfao!!!!!!! Ive watched this too many times lol!!!!! 😂
😂 I think I'd just prepare to die because I can't see myself driving to a hospital and explaining this to anyone on staff lol
Yep. 😅
I fell on it. Lol 😆 🤣 😂
Look it’s either that or your family figures it out during the autopsy
@@TheMewtata 😆 🤣 😂 😹 ill be dead
Perhaps I have no shame, but I would be totally honest and make jokes about it to the medical staff. No point in lying 😂
Doctors: "don't put weird stuff up your butt!"
Me: absolutely correct
Doctors: "don't put q tips in your ears!"
Me: you can't tell me what to do
Oh damn you got me
BAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Fifty years of using Q Tips. Haven't lost one yet!
Use a hook, feels better and you're actually taking things out of your ears instead of pushing it in
Hydrogen Peroxide works, just don't use too much. It also makes happy bubbly noises. Just rinse with cool water after
I know the "I fell" exuse is an old classic at this point but in my mind it would be Less embarrassing to go "we both know how it got there, can we move on to the next question?"
"you see doc, the reason for the candycane was... Well... Tis the season right?😂