What I've learned about parenting as a stay-at-home dad | Glen Henry
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- Опубликовано: 16 сен 2024
- Glen Henry got his superpowers through fatherhood. After leaving behind a job he hated and a manager he didn't get along with, he went to work for an equally demanding boss: his kids. He shares how he went from thinking he knew it all about being a stay-at-home parent to realizing he knew nothing at all -- and how he's now documenting what he's learned.
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Honestly this guy can hold a crowd, he could talk about anything and people would instinctively listen
The guy is a beta.
Doesn't seem to affect his charisma !
Except i tuned out after i realized hes being a sjw.
Years of practice on stage, cuz he's been a rapper for a decade or so. Beleaf is his name.
Stay at home dad here. Being a parent is much harder than any 9-5 job.
Dude, a 9-5 is like a vacation!
THANK YOU from a Mom who stayed home for 14 yrs and did not regret it one bit. God Bless you! 👍
Debbie Spafford I've been a stay-at-home dad for about 3 years now and I still believe I have not figured it out sometimes, actually most of the time I feel like I'm going insane.
😭
As a father of two having spent 5 months as a stay-at-home dad, this is quite a precious talk.
Filipe Almeida thanks Filipe! ruclips.net/video/mi4dpmSiEHA/видео.html
Thank you sir. You are an excellent example of a wonderful father. I loved your talk.
Thanks man I really appreciate it! Here's a video of my experience before the Ted Talk ruclips.net/video/mi4dpmSiEHA/видео.html
Exceptionally well spoken man! Great message.
"The farther makes himself present and the children pursue him." This is exactly how God is He is always waiting for us like a perfect gentleman.
Been stay at home dad with a 4 year old with severe eczema on immunotherapy. It’s a tough job for sure. Spent first 3 years staying up from 6pm-7am because his suffering. It’s the lack of leaving the house/feeling you get from working and coworkers that causes me to have depression. Being with my son is worth anything though.
Great talk. I was part time stay home dad for a couple of years and it's tough, especially when the 2nd comes along.
Maximo101 yes that’s when I started! The 2nd is tough but 3 is next level. ruclips.net/video/mi4dpmSiEHA/видео.html
Amen brother
I have been a stay at home mom for almost 22 years. Best decision I ever made!!
elana R 🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿 ruclips.net/video/mi4dpmSiEHA/видео.html
Every man who thinks that staying at home parenting kinds is easier than the job they do, should experience this. Being a stay at home parent might seem as a piece of cake; they say "what do even do all day sitting at home?" or anything along those lines. But men don't realize that being a mom is a "job" that you can't take weekends off. You don't take holidays and you don't get to go "home" from your job and have at least a few hours rest. There is no chance to quit this job and look for something "more suiting". Being a parent is a "job" that you do 24/7 until your kid grows up and goes their own way. But even then you still have it as a "part time job", because even grown up he/she is still your kid that you keep worrying about 24/7.
Well said.
You are weak. Go move a 25 pound grinder for seven hours across concrete while on your knees. You bee crying for home life in 3 days.
Valient Six no one have to do that that's not a job most all men with kids well tell you being at home with them is harder then working
Kk Kk that is a job that more white men do than any other species of human. And you dont have them on ted talks telling you how difficult thier job is. Women are weak and watching kids is simple.
i am a stay-at-home mum for 6 years now. thanks for converting my feelings into words. it was amusing and a bit sad but most of all comforting.
you're a great dad, you have my respect. thanks for standing up for as stay-at-home parents.
cheers to us! 🥂👍
Well done Beleaf. So proud of you. God bless!
Great TED talk. I admire my SIL (stay-at-home dad) and my daughter who loves her job AND my two grandchildren who adore both of their parents.
Appreciate it! Here's a behind the scenes video ruclips.net/video/mi4dpmSiEHA/видео.html
As a fellow stay at home dad, I have had the advantage of bonding with my child on a daily basis in a way that traditional working dads can't. It's great. It is scary at first, I admit, but the rewards far outweigh the effort. Not to mention, the time from a one week old baby to a kindergartner goes by really quickly, so you can always return to the traditional workforce (at least part time) then.
Go Beleaf! You're an amazing dad and an amazing creator
Wow, I genuinely loved this. My Mom has been a stay-at-home parent as well. She never regretted it!
Exactly me in my life right now. But as a single mum. He made very good points. I can tell. But there is one thing, and that is that u really have to be present 160% and so selfaware in that "parenting period of time" so nothing goes wrong.
Even when u r playing with ur child and others thing ooh thats so simple i could do that allday.. its not just that.
Im also a stay at home dad.. i love my 1 yr old son so much.. i also work graveyard 56 hours a week.. lol.. burned tf out.. i feel bad i cant raise my son better because im tired.. i do my best..
I was a stay at home mom for my two young children. I just got a job last week. And I have been working. I’m getting to know my job. And my boyfriend has just became a stay at home dad. He has been home with our 4 year old and 10 month old. He really appreciates me for being a stay at home parent while he went to work all those months and years. He is really realizing the challenges and rewards that come with being a full time parent.
So awesome! Definitely life changing! Here's a video of my experience before the Ted Talk ruclips.net/video/mi4dpmSiEHA/видео.html
This is for those real men, like myself, who love and appreciate their spouse and children to the point where they will do anything that takes real “big balls” including but not limited to:
putting their own ego aside and having it smashed regularly, the silent scorn of your peers/family/culture, denial of profit or accolades over your own people, disregard for the “traditional family” model, self loathing at times, disrespect from the partners friends and family, literally “on ones knees” chasing and cleaning up after children, fear, resentment, self doubt, seemingly spoiled and sometimes ungrateful family, never ending bucket of love and empathy with a smile is the expectation daily. It is the toughest job to stay on. It is 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, even when you go out on a tour you are still 100% in the stay at home parent game.
I am right there with you.
Thanks man appreciate the support! Here's a video of some of my fears before the Ted Talk ruclips.net/video/mi4dpmSiEHA/видео.html
Beleaf In Fatherhood I see you got skills on the mic! I am an indie music producer/musician/engineer when I am not raising my 3kids. Maybe we can collaborate on a track sometime. I am on some “anti fascist” at the moment but putting out more mellow stuff next album. I am in Burbank, I will go on down to SD to track vocals. Peace and continued success! kitorodriguez.com
Kito Rodriguez definitely up for it!
I feel a lot less alone after watching this. My fiancee doesn't understand.
Mystee Pulcine Sorry Mystee, didn’t mean to make you feel that way. My hope is to provide perspective to Spouses who work and don’t understand what it’s like to stay at home. Could you share this with your fiancé? Maybe it may provide some insight?
Here is a little behind the scenes video to show you what my ted experience was like ruclips.net/video/mi4dpmSiEHA/видео.html
You got it! Only gets better from here.
By far one of the best ted talks. I just followed Beleaf’s personal yt account
Dropout Tone hey thanks fam!!
Single full time dad here. This spoke to me I needed this 😂😂😂😂 this was great 👍🏿
Realy like this video. Seems to me there a lot of stay at home mums could learn a lot from you. For me, success as a parent is how well your children bring up their own children. I sincerely wish you the best of luck.
Stephen Catton thank you Stephen I actually learn a lot from fellow stay at Mother’s and advocating for them as well
My wife works at an Infant school here in the Uk (4 to 7 years of age) as a pastoral care worker and from the stories hear I doubt if any of them would be found rolling around on the floor in nappies (diapers) or engaging them at the same level of intensity that you do. I especially admire what you do as you have two boys. I have 5 grandchildren (all boys) and I have to frequently remind my daughters of their children (actually I let their mother do this as I am not brave or stupid enough) that the world does not stop at their smartphones and that they need to play with their sons. With an eye to your son's future if you haven't already i do recommend that you watch the TED video by Sir Ken Robinson of how schools kill creativity
www.ted.com/talks/ken_robinson_says_schools_kill_creativity .
I think that it highlights what is missing from our educational process and so helps us identify where we as parents can help fill in the gaps.
learning a deeper meaning of love
Your kids are going to be great dude! Fathers make a huge difference
As an 18 year old living alone on welfare I'm constantly terrified of what my future holds. Will I have a successful career? Will I have fulfilling relationships? Will I be able to build a healthy family without resenting them all, should I end up sacrificing my career for them? Even if it had its faults, this talk was a good reminder that I don't have to worry about any of this stuff for a long long time. So that's nice...
So the talk had "faults", and all you got out of it is "glad it's not me yet"? ...lolz.
So basically you haven't been told that as a female the older you wait to have kids the chances of autism down syndrome retardation and deformity increase. The younger you have children the more of there life you can share with them as well. Vs being 65 when they are 15 years old... oh are those your grand kids? Ouch
Also...keep in mind no one has any idea what they're doing. No matter what you read, we're all just making it up as we go. No one has it all figured out, especially at 18.
Mac Ton I have a job. And full time education. And a disability. And you don't know which country I live in, so it's nice of you to assume it's your own taxes that fund my extravagant, fraudulent, greedy lifestyle. Thanks.
Ignore the wannabe edgy boys replying. They love to come on to TED talk videos and spew their insecurities on anyone who dare comment.
You'll figure it out. Stay in school and work hard. Education is the way out and up. You don't have to have kids ( and you have 17 years until you're at risk for having a kid with Down Syndrome, so ignore that asshole's comment too), and if you do have kids, it will work out. But yes, focus on improving yourself for now. The ifs don't matter. Now matters.
Thanks for the video, been feeling lost after assuming the same role.
All i can say man is thank you
Thank you for your presentation
Beautiful
Thank you Glen Henry
This is awesome. I love it!
The best psychiatrist and dad ever. "Creativity comes from the emotions." Never realized that, of course.
Emocionante, uma verdadeira lição de vida!
My goal before 2020 is to become a stay home dad. First, I gotta find a way to make 6 figure income so I can quit my corporate job. 2nd find a nice gal for my kids. And last, enjoy every min of raising my own kids. It's much better than giving them up to some stranger in a wicked school system!!
Wow! Congratulations Beleaf!!!
Thank you so much! Here's a behind the scenes video ruclips.net/video/mi4dpmSiEHA/видео.html
It's difficult. I started that experience at 20. You can't hide from it until you make up your mind to be.
Stay at home dad here for a couple of years after getting out of the military. I keep going through depression episodes, like right now I have no motivation to do anything. Feel like I'm in a rut going through the motions every day. Some days I'll try and teach my 4 year old numbers letters etc. But I know I'm not a good teacher and I get frustrated easy. All my kid does is watch tv all day from sun up tell sun down. I just feel like I'm failing as a father that I should be doing something with/for my kid but dont know what or how.
Omg! Really powerful
As a work from home mom the emotional fatigue is so real
I decided to give up my job to help care for family but it basically helped shoot my professional career in the foot. I would have continued working part-time or flexibly but that wasn’t an option - they wanted all or nothing. Seems like workplaces still don’t allow for work-life balance, even though they are supposed to offer that kind of flexibility by law.
JE Hoyes yea I totally understand check out my journey to the ted stage ruclips.net/video/mi4dpmSiEHA/видео.html
Thank you ! People have to see this ! It's hard to stay at home 7/24 /365 ... It's not sitting on a chair, look TV, and waiting .... Lol. 😂 So many people think it's just that ..... Good luck to your family 😜
Отличное выступление! Согласна с ним полностью в том, что иногда бывают моменты эмоционального истощения, именно поэтому, находясь в декретном отпуске, я периодически подрабатываю себе в удовольствие, когда муж меня заменяет в свои выходные дни.
◕‿◕ loved it 💜 !
i stayed for the first two years (my max) and gained so much from it
(am very close to my baby which is now all grownup and in the navy).
(ღ˘⌣˘ღ) kudos, friend ! your kids had gained and will not forget it. i promisssss
Guys a gem
Awesome.
I have had difficult situations but never "hated" a job. First and foremost--- what is the purpose of employment: serving others or serving yourself? There lies the problem.
Ivtook my kidsvto school everyday of their school days; then I went to a jobsite. When I got home I spent a littlevtime with the family and then eorked 'til 11:00 pm on average. Weekends were in my home shop.
7 days x 12 hours = about 80 hours for 20 years.
Jobs and projects afforded me the opportunity to raise our kids and be home more than on the road. Win-Win for my employers and my family. 💗
Leaf!! My g!!!
GoljansTwin YO!!!!
Being a disabled parent of two children one being autistic is super frustrating and tough..
Friday, may 6, 4:35 pm
It's fun here but of word. Song Heng doesn't live on a farm. His folks have a large apartment in a big old house. The call it a flat. I asked for the bathroom they thought I wanted a bath. I'm learning fast.
Great video!!
No one died bruh
😂😂
daisyaf FACTS 😂
Ted talk behind the scenes ruclips.net/video/mi4dpmSiEHA/видео.html
I want to be a stay at home dad in a few years and earn enough on RUclips to support a family, Looks like part of the RUclips channel is going to be rolling on the ground with a diaper on my head with my kids in the future
Keep make quality content
Felix Nurwahid I’ll do my best
For most people it's literally impossible for one parent's income to support the entire family. Both parents *must* work. This is not 1950s America.
Not really, it is very expensive to put kids in daycare to point where it be cheaper be a stay home dad or mom. Not every one needs big screen tv's and fancy cell phones.
mindlesstube
If daycare is equivalent to a parent's entire salary in your area, there's something seriously wrong already.
In an ideal scenario, both parents would work part-time (3 days a week) so the child would only need 1 day of daycare. That would both put you in a lower tax bracket and minimize costs, plus other benefits which I could go into.
Try getting rid of that internet bill tv bill and restaraunts. You can make it just fine...
its virtually required that you have internet because so many jobs and school work requires it, the same for cellphone bills.
Except sometimes the income doesn't balance out daycare. We cut some serious corners and make a single income household work
am I the only one who busted out in tears lol
how many of my friend gushed I am jealous of your sister when I said she was a mom. I want to be "Mr Mom"
SpeAk TrUTH!🤓😉😊
It is cute and quite relatable but it would have been better if some genuine issues or problems related to parenting were discussed with possible solutions.
Ashique Desai oh okay... 😂
Ashique Desai the substance requires more thought. The point is that you never know what it’s like to be in someone else’s shoes therefore, you can’t judge. I use my experience being stay at father to show how ignorant I was. Now that I’ve spent time in that position I have a new perspective. The question now becomes what else do think I know? Does that help?
Beleaf In Fatherhood, Hey pal I am not judging you, I am a father myself and I can understand what you are talking about and I appreciate that. But I was just giving you my honest feedback. You are a good public speaker and the subject you chose is great too...but it is missing something...there is humour, there is relatability but there isn't any thing concrete or with substance, this is my personal opinion, you keep on making great videos, may be my little feedback which has irked you a little now, will help you in your future work or may be not! Don't bother. Take care. The talk was nice by the way...if I did not mention it.👍
Ashique Desai sorry if I seemed a little irritated that wasn’t my intent I appreciate the feedback. Maybe this helps add context ruclips.net/video/mi4dpmSiEHA/видео.html
Dope!
LEt's go
Beleaf Melanin. I see you.
BELEAF!!🍃
M e HEY!!!
❤️❤️
💙💜
Re-upload?
TheKarleil no, the other one was on TEDx
Pimpin in the apt laundry room. Sukit
You lucky SOB :)
Don't EVER let that woman go !
Beleaf!!!!
MARTIN 2nd HEYY!!
.
😄
13th comment
Moral of the story: Dont have kids.
PaiN ExoTiC good luck finding joy and purpose later on in life, but maybe you’re the exception to the rule.
PaiN ExoTiC It’s not for everyone. I wouldn’t do it. Mind you, caring for a dependent family member isn’t limited to children. So, chances are quite high that at some point in your life you will have to face being a primary carer for someone who needs feeding and being kept clean.
I have and it's one of the reasons I don't want kids in adulthood. Had the responsibility of semi-taking care of my younger brother when I was younger and it has had a lasting effect on me to not want any of my own.
first
For anyone gullible enough to believe that being a stay at home parent is *the hardest job in the world* or even some great achievement, I'm here to inform you that the vast majority of women will not agree to work while the father takes care of the children. When situations like that occur, the woman often starts to resent and leaves the man. Even when she comes up with the idea and the man simply follows it, she will no longer find him attractive and kick him. "Stay at home dads just ain't sexy." and "Love is a one way street."
My SIL is a stay-at-home dad and he's great with my grandchildren, they are growing up happy and well-rounded and my daughter just (two months ago) got a great promotion at the company she's worked for since she was 16.
I don't know how you came to believe what you posted (if you believe it), but life isn't that way all over.
Steve Muratore An exception doesn't disprove a rule. Without a rule, there can be no exceptions to it.
Exceptional women do exist. That is why I used *the vast majority of women*, *often* etc.
Sweetie...who hurt you?
Jacob Collazo right
What exactly was the point of this other than to pander to women about how hard it is to be a mother?
Stephen Bennett telling fathers to be better fathers
Being a mother is hard. Im a dude so I wouldn't know first hand but it's a challenge
to be really really funny and an amusing watch? can't talks just be talks sometimes? Is it bad to pander to women...? they are like 50% of the population. pandering to 50% of the world's population is pretty good. There are plenty of ted talks that pander to small small subsections of society (a percent of a percent).
TheManzinator just cus I typed one thing doesn't always mean another thing. Im saying that the experience that people in Glenn's position learn a lot on how to be a better parent imo. Definitely not disregarding the working parents who are out here providing for their family.
There's always one jerk in every comment thread. Congratulations to Stephen for winning.
He lost me the moment he said "we are pregnant"
c@mbaz what’s wrong with that?
This video what so completely obtuse and unironic. I was first dumbfounded and then just offended that TED would drop the bar this low. I kept waiting for the profound part, but it kept getting worse and worse until I realized that this was it, another straight man talking about what women as mothers and caregivers have been saying for centuries and centuries. And that doesn't even scratch on the interesting or important topics about caregiving that have been studied and discusses. I'm sorry to go full Womyn's Studies on you all, but I can't help it. Other than being a man who has experienced something new that women have already experienced and been outspoken about, what gives Glen the authority? For one, what was that dry-erase board thing?? Does Glen know anything about early childhood education? He did say he "read an article" *rolls eyes*. So in that part of the video, Glen begins, "I thought I knew that the best way to teach kids right from wrong was to discipline them...the pain, the fear, that would teach them" (6:14). Unfortunately misinformed. I wonder which powerful, gender-based system of violence, oppression, and control gave Glen those ideas about raising kids... Anyway, then without explaining at all what he's doing with that poor 2 year old (to us or him?), Glen says he, "makes connections that they can understand". Much better! Very sharp stuff you've got there with the dry erase board... Oh, and I hate to rag on his little home made videos, but spewing those irresponsible patriarchal views makes it worth it. The home video clips...were a little painful. The kids were cute, but the videos were clearly staged by the dad, or at least had a big element of "ooOOH let me go grab my camera!" when a stereotypically cute thing happened, like drawing on the walls with crayon while wearing matching superhero masks. And then good on Glen for making up games and taking his children outside? Good on him for giving his enlightened, sensitive perspective to another man too? You're being a MODERATE parent. You haven't impressed me at all yet. Honestly, that fictional woman that you made up about the laundry and the child and the dog made me more sympathetic. Not only do women stay at home at significantly higher %'s than men, but women care for children as single mothers at significantly higher %'s than men. Are any of them trending #2 on TED Talks right now? TED Talks, please delete this boring waste of a viewer's time and find a real, original, well-done, and worthy "Idea Worth Spreading" to replace it. Maybe by a mom?
With that attitude, the only straight man in your life will be your hand.
Thank you ! People have to see this ! It's hard to stay at home 7/24 /365 ... It's not sitting on a chair, look TV, and waiting .... Lol. 😂 So many people think it's just that ..... Good luck to your family 😜